I know you’re scratching your head on this one. “Why,” you ask. It’s because they taught me things I never would’ve learned otherwise. And they showed me things that, although weren’t pleasant, were things I would need to know later.
1. They showed me the kind of person I never wanted to be and still never want to be.
2. They showed me the ugliest side of human nature.
3. They showed me the level of evil humans are capable of.
4. They showed me the types of people I don’t need nor want in my life.
5. They showed me the types of people to always avoid.
6. They showed me what signs to watch out for.
7. They gave me the determination to love myself and to go after what I want in life.
8. They molded me into a good judge of character.
9. They taught me the value of true, genuine friendships and to take no one for granted.
Yes. Although they were brutal people, and none of the bullying they dished out was fun by any stretch of the imagination, my bullies in school taught me all these things. And I hold these takeaways close to my heart today.
It’s hard to look for the silver lining while people are bullying you. However, once you get away from your bullies and the torment is over, not only do you regain a renewed sense of hope, but you also see so much clearer the lessons in what you had to endure.
With knowledge comes empowerment!
0 thoughts on “I’m Thankful for My Bullies”
Exactly. Taking out the positives from the negatives. Great Post!
Thank you so much, Kritika. It took me a long, long time to reach this point but better late than never. 😀
Well said and congratulations to you for your growth and perseverance and then enlightening so many people. <3
Thank you so much. <3
Have you ever read Robert Greene?
Yes I have! I looooove his books! I’ve read “The 48 Laws of Power,” “The Laws of Human Nature,” “The 33 Strategies of War,” and “The Art of Seduction.” I’m going to read “Mastery” real soon.
Interesting, what did you take from them?
I take from them lessons on how to survive and how to live the best life possible. How to protect yourself against invisible enemies. How to avoid social pitfalls. How to get to where you want to go…this is the short version. If I gave you the long version, this comment would be miles long. LOLOL
So, the reason I asked is because Greene and his type – actually Sun tzu and Machiavelli came first for me – offered a bit of a sea change. Before I came across Sun tzu and Machiavelli, I had read thousands of pages about how people “should” be, how they might change to conform with “universal” values.
After I’d read them, I discovered the delight of putting “should be” aside and focusing on how people are and, even more, appreciating them for how they actually are.
I wondered if you’d had a similar experience.
I did. I noticed that too and I knew that wasn’t reality. And having been bullied in the past, I make it a point to accept people as they are. I think those books are more advice and strategy books than anything. I’m reading Sun Tzu’s “The Art of War” right now- just started on it and so far, so good. Once I’m done with that, I move on to Machiavelli’s “The Prince.” I guess I’m going about it backwards.
I don’t know if it’s “backwards,” just the opposite direction I took. (I didn’t know Greene existed until 2017.) Also, the Prince is Machiavelli’s most famous book, and his most accessible, but I think “Discourses on Livy” is actually better, if you have the time for a longer work.
How did Greene’s works interact with your experiences being bullied?
Having been bullied made me want to learn what drives people to bully- it made me want to learn everything about people in general. I wanted to learn what motivates people, who they do what they do and the psychological payoffs they sought from their actions. I wanted to know how some people could be well- liked while others hated. I wanted to learn all the secrets to deter bullies and all the secrets to protect yourself from enemies and I felt that in order to do that, I had to learn about the dark side of human nature so that I can better think ahead and predict. I did this years ago.
One of the things I learned from those writers is how “being good” without any power doesn’t mean much. It’s actually something I practice with my Education College students.
Absolutely, Ben! And it’s good that you remind your students that. Sadly, most schools and colleges don’t teach that. It makes you wonder why.