The End of a Precious Life

bullying, empowerment, phoenix rising in the sky

I’m sad to have to inform everyone that my family and I lost our youngest grandchild this past Sunday. We not only mourn the loss of this beautiful child, but we also mourn for the parents. I look at these wonderful parents and try to put myself in their shoes and I just can’t.

Out of respect for their privacy, I won’t reveal their names, but they are hurting in ways that anyone who hasn’t experienced this kind of thing will never comprehend. I cannot even fathom the heartbreak and yes, the anger and and feelings of injustice they are enduring. My husband and I are sad and angry too as is my daughter-by-marriage and her family. This is going to be a very difficult Christmas for us all, especially the parents, and all anyone can feel is sad.

It hard enough to lose an adult loved one. However, when it’s a child, it’s especially hard because you always expect your children to bury you one day, not the other way around. It goes totally against the natural order of things.

The birth of a child brings so many hopes for the future but the death of a child dashes all those hopes. The parents will always wonder what that child could have grown up to be and accomplish, what he/she would look like at age 2, 5, 10, 16, and beyond. Their hearts will forever yearn for him/her.

My apologies for the delays in response to any comments. 2023 has been a difficult year, yes. However, the loss of a child is the worst tragedy that can ever befall any parent (or grandparent). As a grandparent, you don’t want to focus too much on your own grief but to be strong for the parents (your child, stepchild, or even grandchild). You want to say or do something- anything to make them feel better. However, you know that no words nor good deeds of yours could ever assuage their pain. So, you just vow to be there for them anyway you can.

My heart not only cries for the lost child, but also, the bereaved parents. That child is in heaven with The Lord now so he will never have to suffer. However, those left behind will have the hardest journey ahead. Therefore, I ask you to please pray for the parents. Also pray for the older brother and the entire family. Pray that God will comfort them and give them the strength to carry on.

Services will be tomorrow at noon.

Thank you all so very much.

4 Reasons Bullies Bring up Your Past

If you are a target of bullying, have you ever noticed that bullies always seem to bring up your past? A past mistake? A record of some kind, such as a police record of vandalism you might have committed when you were seventeen. Maybe you got drunk at a frat party and did a table dance while stripping down to your underwear. Whatever the faux pas might have been, people sure seem to love throwing it in your face.

However, I want you to realize that they do this for several reasons. And if you knew those reasons, you just might end up feeling so much better about yourself.

Therefore, here are 4 reasons bullies bring up your past:

1. Your bullies do it out of jealousy.

A jealous person feels threatened by your good qualities and accomplishments. Your bullies may resent an accomplishment. Also, they could envy a characteristic you’ve recently developed. Maybe you’re becoming more confident lately and they’re jealousy of your confident attitude. You’ve brought your grades up and begun making straight A’s. Or you’ve won that coveted promotion at work. It could be that you’ve gotten an outstanding paying job with one of the top paying companies in town. Nevertheless, they see that you’re evolving and it threatens their power.

Understand that anytime you accomplish something, no matter how small, you will attract a mountain of jealousy your way. However, the best thing to do is to let them go ahead and act out. Realize that they’re doing it out of raw emotion and chances are, they’ll make total fools of themselves.

In other words, when a bully acts out of jealousy, he is unwittingly admitting to you and the other people around him that he feels inferior to you. Remember the quote by Napoleon Bonaparte, “Never interfere with an enemy in the process of destroying himself.

2. Your past is just that – the past.

Realize that we all have pasts, some good and others not so pleasant. We’ve all made mistakes and will continue to make them. There is nothing you can do about the past. What’s done is done and it’s time to forgive yourself and move on. Even if you have others who constantly remind you of the “old you”, you must keep in mind that you’ve changed for the better and that person doesn’t exist anymore.

Moreover, here’s something else to keep in mind. Several celebrities had rough pasts before they became famous. Some came from incarceration, others were addicts or came from poverty. Therefore, never be ashamed of your past. It doesn’t define you, nor does it determine what your future will be.

3. The bullies are getting desperate.

They’re desperate to find something terrible you’ve done or were involved in to sully your reputation. Understand that if they can’t find dirt on you, their next objective is to bring up your past.

4. Your past is the stepping-stone that got you to where you are now.

Whatever you might have done or gotten involved in during your past, you had to go through that phase of your life to get where you are now. It was only a stop along the road that lead you to the place you’re at today. So, don’t be ashamed of it. Be proud of how far you’ve come since.

So, don’t let that shake you. Do not let these people tear you down! Consequently, there are so many people who either live in regret of their pasts, or they let others make them feel bad by reminding them of it. These people can’t seem to move forward because something which happened years ago is holding them back.

Therefore, don’t be one of these people! Know that your past doesn’t determine your future. See this dirty tactic for what it is and see your bullies for who and what they are. They are only jealous and desperate people with low self-esteem and insecurity issues. And the only way they can feel better about themselves is to pee on your victories and bring you down to their level. Pathetic, isn’t it?

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Heide’s Story of Hope and Inspiration

May be an image of 1 person, bangs and smiling
Here is the heartwarming story of a lady who not only survived bullying, but overcame it. She draws on her faith and singing talent to inspire others and give them hope.
This is my story—of oppression, of getting through, of moving on—my survival story.
Looking back on the events of my life, I realize that the hurt I’ve dealt with was due to extreme neglect as a child. Our parents’ loved their children to the best of their ability; however, my mother suffered from major depression, to the point where she was slowly giving up on life. And, in my father’s case, his own father had left him when he was young.
No one had taught my mother and father how to be good parents. As a child, I had very little to no supervision. My mother was very carefree with us. One memory I retain was when I was four years old. I was swimming in a lake, and a neighbor frantically called my mom to let her know I was out there. My mother’s response was to ask her to just send me home. To this day, my family and I laugh about it, but looking back, it was extremely neglectful on my mother’s part.
As I started school, kids were very mean. I was teased, spat on; I was not picked for teams in gym, and I often sat alone at lunch. Teachers would not say anything to stop it. I felt scared to go to school and terrified to ride the bus. I truly hated elementary and middle school. I hardly had any friends, and the ones I thought were my friends were often two-faced. We came from a poor upbringing and I believe that these were part of the reasons I was made fun of and rejected so much.
In seventh grade, I was at a friend’s house, in her basement, and a girl with rings on physically beat me up, holding me down and punching me repeatedly in the face. There was a boy watching and swinging a knife around, laughing. Then I had to walk two miles home in the dark, alone, after being beat up. When I got home, my mother was lying in bed, asleep, with no idea I hadn’t been home.
Looking back, I was severely neglected, and it wasn’t a nurturing, caring living environment. When my mother was not working, she was sleeping. Now and then she did things to take care of us, but most of the time, we ran the streets and fended for ourselves. Sadly, she passed away from breast cancer when I was thirteen.
Over the years of neglect, I developed many insecurities. I now realize the trauma I dealt with made it difficult to socialize with other children as well. My sisters and I came from a poor upbringing, and I truly believe that is one of the reasons as to why I was made fun of and rejected growing up. Many years later, I was diagnosed with ADD/OCD and anxiety. I had these brain-based challenges my entire life but did not realize it at the time.
OCD/ADD causes individuals to be impulsive, to have less patience around others, and to overthink everything. These tendencies can cause people to react to you in a way you may not deserve, but it’s unfortunately a result of struggling with mental health issues. These issues were key as to why I heavily grieved over losing my mother, why I chose relationships that kept me feeling “vulnerable,” and why I always felt so alone.
I even allowed my ex-husband to control everything in our marriage. I wanted to feel safe, but this led to various forms of abuse. In 2015, I became a single mother, and even though I was scared of failing and struggled financially, I had to learn how to do everything on my own. Though difficult, I became a strong woman and a mother, and I was finally happy.
These foundations of my identity, as well as my faith in Jesus, helped me feel secure and that true hope could be fulfilled. To this day, I still struggle with self-esteem issues, anxiety, and some seasonal depression; however, I choose to see other people’s needs instead of focusing on my own negative emotions. My goal is to use my past hurts to bring them hope. I have a motto for myself: “I’m the glass half full kinda girl.”
Year ago, when I shared my story, others would often say, “I don’t remember you being bullied, when/who bullied you?” Questions like these caused me to question the validity of the pain I felt and made me think I had no right to use the word “abuse/bullied” to describe my pain. However, as I dealt with all of the denial, anger, blame, sadness, and grief over the years, I realized I indeed had the right to feel everything I did, and no person could take that away from me.
That emotional strength and security has made me want to make a positive out of EVERY negative. Recently, I reached out to the girl that beat me up in the seventh grade and I reminded her of the events that happened. She did not even remember and explained how much hurt she was going through at the time. She apologized, I told her I forgave her, and now we are friends and talk from time to time. So you see, I chose to use my pain to inspire others and show them that there IS hope, no matter what you go through in life.
Sometime it is as simple as saying hello to random people on the street, calling others by their names, making sure to wear a smile often, and going out of my way to be a friend to ANYONE who needs one. This is especially important to me, since I lost my brother in 2018 to suicide.
I know I suffered a lot of loss and hardships in life, but I know that others have suffered quite a lot more. We all experience different things, and what’s important is not how others think we’ve lived, but instead how we ourselves experience life.
Thinking of everything I’ve been through I realize that even though I can’t control what happened to me I decided to turn it into hope for others.
I’m strong because it made me who I am today.
I am compassionate and empathetic towards others and I take every opportunity to be an inspiration for every person I can.
I love to sing more than anything. It brings me so much joy and I inspire others while I do.
I love to smile, laugh, encourage others and to help them feel worthy of everything life has to offer.
This life has taught me to forgive, move forward and love others
I TRULY believe if I can share—or sing, a passion of mine—my story and save a life or even inspire one person, then it makes it worth going through all of this pain and coming out the other side.

VIDEO: School Board Will Not Help Special Needs Child Bullied by Classmates and Their Parents

Guys, this is despicable! The target’s classmates have put a special needs middle school girl and a few other targets at the school on a hit list. What’s even worse is that the bullies’ adult parents and other family members are calling this child’s phone and leaving threatening messages on her phone late at night and in the wee hours of the morning. Still, the school board acts like it’s a big joke. My heart goes out to this young lady and her family. May God form a hedge of protection around them and keep them safe.  Watch below:

Hello Fellow Bloggers and Friends! I’ve Missed You!

I hope you all have been enjoying the Springtime. I’ve been taking a long hiatus from blogging due to exhaustion and recovering from health issues. However, I plan to begin posting again starting next week. I won’t post nearly as often as I did in the past, maybe once per month on average. Know that you all have been on my mind and I appreciate each and every one of you. And, as you can see, I’ve finally gone self-hosted and I couldn’t be happier about it!

Have a wonderful rest of this week! ‘See you next week!

Daily Prompt- 1838 – Death

I’ve always known that we each owe a death- that, eventually, death comes to us all. However, it never really hit home with me until 2005, when I lost both my father and maternal grandmother, both exactly ten weeks apart.

Up until that year, at the age of thirty-four, I was fortunate not to have lost anyone who was close to me. And I look back now and think that I might have taken things a little for granted before. The death of a loved one really puts things into perspective.

It has a way of changing our view. It reminds us to appreciate each day we’re giving and to show more love to the people we love. We must let our loved ones know how much we love and appreciate them each time we visit them or see them in the supermarket. For we never know when it could be the last time we ever get to talk to them.

Taking Life for Granted

When we’re young, we don’t take death as seriously as we should and don’t yet understand the finality of it. However,  as we age, and with each passing loved one, we look at this life a little differently.

The older we get, the closer we get to our own appointment with death. As such, we’re more grateful with each morning we rise. Speaking for myself personally, I have made a vow to stay away from drama and people who bring it. Life is too short to spend time with people who drain the oxygen out of the room.

Also, I make it a point to love hard the family I have left- my mother, aunts, the uncles I have left, and my siblings, husband and children.  I don’t know how many years I have left. The average lifespan for a woman is around 80 years old. Therefore, statistically speaking, I have about 28 years left if God allows. And I want to make the next 28 years, the best of my life.

But more importantly, I want to love and embrace my living family while they’re still here and to savor each day given me.

Hi-Ho! Hi-Ho! It’s Back to Work I Go!

Good morning, readers and fellow bloggers. On Jan 9, I started a new job. Which is the reason I haven’t posted many articles as of late, only quotes that had been per-scheduled in December.

So far, the job has been great and I enjoy it. I am getting out of the house and meeting new people, with the exception of the last few days due to the winter storm that hit my area, of course. Know that although I have been away and it takes longer for me to answer your comments, I’m still thinking of you and I will pop in from time to time to answer comments and replies.

God bless you. And pray for me as I embark on this new job.



“10 sneaky signs you have low self-esteem (and how to cure it)” Blog from Fingerprint for Success

Low self-esteem: what it is, how to spot it, and how to be more confident.

Low self-esteem can hold you back from your dreams. Read on to find out what coaches, therapists, and psychologists have to say about some surprising signs of low self-esteem. Plus, find out what you can do to be more confident.

What is low self-esteem? And how is it different from low self-confidence?

The American Psychological Association defines self-esteem as:

the degree to which the qualities and characteristics contained in one’s self-concept are perceived to be positive. It reflects a person’s physical self-image, view of his or her accomplishments and capabilities, and values and perceived success in living up to them, as well as the ways in which others view and respond to that person.”

Self-esteem is how you see yourself and how well you like yourself. Self-confidence, on the other hand, is your belief in yourself and your abilities. You can have high self-confidence but low self-esteem. For example, you might believe in your social skills and know that you’re good at making friends (high self-confidence), but you might not like yourself (low self-esteem).

Even though they’re different, learning how to be more confident can help you build self-esteem, since it can affect how you view yourself. If you see yourself as capable and skilled, you might appreciate yourself more.

What are the signs of low self-esteem?

Below are some signs of low self-esteem that might surprise you.

1. Poor boundaries

If you find that you’re constantly saying “yes” to things you don’t want to do, this could be a sneaky sign of low self-esteem.

“When we are not feeling confident and sure of ourselves, we compromise our boundaries and comfortability for other people,” says licensed marriage and family therapist Janika Veasley, LMFT. “We don’t believe that we can advocate for ourselves and still maintain the relationship. However, the more sure and confident we are, the more we hold onto our boundaries and connection with others.”

2. Humor

Everyone loves the class clown, but dig a little deeper, and that jokester might actually be dealing with negative self-perception.

“Comedy is usually born from a seed of tragedy that is well cared for and nurtured,” explains life coach Kate Chapman. “If the humor is self-deprecating or cuts another person down, that is a sign of very low self-esteem on the part of the joke teller. Humor can be used in all sorts of ways. If it’s being used as a weapon—making fun of a person, as opposed to a situation—then it’s being used by someone who has a low sense of self. Once a person knows what it’s like to esteem themselves (and also others), their humor most always changes into something that uplifts, rather than cuts down.”

3. Self-deprecation

Constantly putting yourself down, even if it’s in a joking manner, is yet another sign that you might not value yourself. If you don’t think highly of yourself, it’s easy to shoot down compliments or make fun of yourself as a way to beat others to the punch.

4. Over-apologizing

People with low self-esteem are especially prone to thinking they’re bad or that they’ve done something wrong. To compensate for this, they’ll apologize frequently, even when they don’t need to. For example, someone with low self-esteem might be having a friendly conversation with someone and then suddenly say, “Ugh, sorry I’m talking so much.”

5. Problems accepting praise

Can’t take a compliment? While others might think you’re being modest, it could be that you don’t esteem yourself.

“Some people may see it as humility, but people with low self-esteem tend to find it difficult to accept positive feedback or compliments because they don’t see themselves positively,” explains clinical psychologist Brian Wind, Ph.D., the chief clinical officer at JourneyPure treatment center.

6. Comparing yourself to others

Remember, self-esteem is about valuing yourself and seeing your qualities as positive. When you lack these things, you’ll fall prey to constant self-comparison. Someone with low self-esteem might obsess over the positive qualities others have and think that they lack these same positive qualities. This constant self-comparison feeds that negative self-view and lowers self-esteem even more.

7. Arrogance

Ever met someone who seemed so arrogant that you were sure they thought they were the greatest thing since sliced bread? Well, it might actually be the opposite.

“When we meet arrogant people, we often get frustrated as we cannot understand why they think so highly of themselves,” says Ray Sadoun, an addiction advocate at OK Rehab. “However, they are often secretly insecure. They mask their low self-esteem by pretending to be extremely confident, which throws people off the scent.”

8. Refusal to try new things

If a friend asked you to take up surfing with them or join them in a pottery class, would you be excited by the opportunity to try something new? Or would you shrink from the potential to fail?

“A lack of openness to trying new things could be attributed to past discouragement or failure when things were attempted that didn’t end well for us,” says Erin Dierickx, a licensed marriage and family therapist associate. “Perhaps we tried a new activity but became embarrassed after not succeeding after the first or many tries. Or maybe we were told by someone we know, love, and trust, particularly at a young age, that we weren’t meant to do something or weren’t very good at it.”

9. Taking things personally

Being sensitive can be a superpower, but if you find that you’re frequently hurt by someone else’s words or actions, it might be an indicator that you’re struggling with low self-esteem. Why? If you liked who you are, your sense of self wouldn’t feel threatened by external factors.

“People with high self-esteem feel good enough about themselves that they don’t take things personally,” says empowerment coach Patricia Heitz.

10. Overcompensating

Do you frequently take on more than you can handle or try to prove yourself to others? You might be overcompensating, and that might be a sign of low self-esteem.

“There is usually an extreme external focus of needing attention, wanting to be in charge, accepting more of a workload than others, feeling compelled to say yes when they should be saying no,” explains licensed mental health counselor Justin Baksh, LMHC, MCAP, the chief clinical officer at Foundations Wellness Center.

What causes low self-esteem?

Adversity and trauma

When I asked mental health professionals for causes of low self-esteem, one common theme emerged: there are many causes of low self-esteem, and they all have to do with adversity.

“Some things that can contribute to low self-esteem can include abuse, trauma, difficult social experiences, and failing at something you wanted to succeed at,” says licensed professional counselor Mikela Hallmark, LPC.

Inflated praise during childhood

Too much of a good thing can also cause low self-esteem. Research published in Child Development found that receiving inflated praise during childhood can lower a person’s self-esteem because they’re worried about living up to those high expectations. Instead, it’s better if parents treat their children warmly.

Not being seen in childhood and adolescence

“When a person is not heard nor acknowledged by others, it is difficult for that person to develop a solid sense of self,” explains licensed marriage and family therapist Ashley Hudson, LMFT. “They are attempting to be unique and try on many hats when developing their identity. If the child or teenager is not validated nor acknowledged for the unique self they are, other views of themself creep in and can potentially lead to low self-esteem.”

How to be more confident: 7 ideas for boosting belief in your abilities

1. Cultivate positive relationships

In a meta-analysis published in 2019 in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, the American Psychological Association found that positive relationships, social support and social acceptance boost self-esteem. But the inverse is also true: having low self-esteem could negatively affect relationships.

Study author Michelle A. Harris, Ph.D., of The University of Texas at Austin noted that, because of this reciprocal relationship, if someone struggles with low self-esteem or has poor social relationships, clinical interventions can help break the cycle.

2. Join more identity-based groups

Speaking of positive social relationships, belonging to multiple social identity-based groups can boost self-esteem more than friendships alone. That’s according to research by the Canadian Institute for Advanced Research and published in PLOS One.

By looking at groups of school children, the elderly, and the formerly homeless, researchers found that, consistently, multiple group memberships predicted self-esteem, but a large network of friends did not. However, this was only true when the groups contributed to the participants’ sense of self (identity-based groups).

3. Savor nature

A 2020 survey of 3,000 adults in Japan found that more frequent use of greenspace and views of greenery through windows at home was linked to increased levels of self-esteem during the pandemic.

“Our results suggest that nearby nature can serve as a buffer in decreasing the adverse impacts of a very stressful event on humans,” said lead author Masashi Soga, Ph.D., of The University of Tokyo.

So the next time you’re feeling down about yourself, try savoring the view from your window. If you don’t have a good view of nature around you, walk to a park if you can.

4. Work with a coach

Coaches are professionals who are experienced in unearthing the root problems that are holding you back from realizing your full potential. They’ll discuss your goals and struggles, as well as ask questions that help you come to new realizations. When you find the right coach, they can truly help you gain perspective that you wouldn’t get on your own.

5. Enlist the help of a mental health professional

If your low self-esteem is frequently interfering with your life, a good place to start is speaking with your physician or contacting a licensed therapist. Both are qualified to address and diagnose mental health concerns and help develop a treatment plan, or at least, they can point you in the right direction. Even a routine checkup with your family doctor is a completely appropriate time to bring up self-esteem concerns; they can refer you to the right provider if necessary.

6. Set small, achievable goals

Confidence comes from seeing proof of your ability, but the problem is, being good at something the first time you try it is unrealistic. To build confidence, give yourself some grace and start small when setting goals.

For example, instead of saying you want to run a marathon when you’ve never run before, start with buying a pair of running shoes. Then, break them in by walking around your neighborhood. Gradually, you can build up to short runs around the block, running a 5K, a 10K, and so forth, until your body is capable of doing a marathon. By starting small, you give yourself a boost of confidence each time you achieve that small milestone until, eventually, you achieve the big goal.

7. Use positive affirmations with caution

Positive affirmations such as “I am loved” or “I can do this” are usually touted as effective ways to boost self-esteem—but there’s a caveat: they may make those with low self-esteem feel worse. That’s according to research by psychologist Joanne Wood, Ph.D. In one experiment, she and her colleagues randomly assigned participants to a neutral-focus or positive-focus condition. Both groups were given a positive statement (“I am a lovable person”). The positive-focus group was asked to focus on how the statement was true for them, while the neutral-focus group was asked to focus on how the statement was true and not true for them.

The results? Participants with low self-esteem reported feeling worse when they were told to focus on how the statement was true for them (positive-focus group) when compared to the neutral focus. For those with high self-esteem, though, there was no change, regardless of positive or neutral focus on the statement.

If positive affirmations work for you, great! But if they make you feel worse, try more neutral affirmations. For example, instead of saying, “I am a generous person,” say something that can’t be disputed, like, “Tessa made it to her doctor’s appointment because I drove her there.” That way, it’s not a generalization but a concrete example of generosity. While you might balk at being called “generous,” you can’t dispute that Tessa got to her appointment because you took the time and energy to drive her there.

You can learn how to be more confident

As you can see, low self-esteem can block so many areas of your life, and there are many potential root causes. But thankfully, you can build both self-confidence and self-esteem. Sometimes, you just need a little support and guidance.

Want to improve your low self-esteem? Get fast, personalized online coaching today.

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Lowlife Homewreckers

Breaking up the families

And destroying the lives

Wrecking the happy homes

Along with the hearts of wives

Stealing the children’s fathers

Twerking in the dive bars

No morals and no self-respect

Picked up in different cars

So fast and loose

Thinking you’re all that

Acting silly as a goose

But you’re only an alleycat

While never thinking of the reality

If he cheats with you, he’ll cheat on you

See, I told you so, Runaround Sue!

Attention New Followers!!!

As of May 31, 2022, WordPress has taken away my ability to follow new blogs nor like new posts. And they’ve done it for reasons that are unjust.

However, I do have a plan B. I can put you in my blog roll and keep up with your posts this way. It’s the next best thing to following. Know that I do appreciate new follows and if I could, I’d follow you in a heartbeat! God bless you all!

Losing My Beloved Furbaby

This is so painful to type. My tears flow down my cheeks and land on my keyboard. Tonight, my beloved Pomeranian, Roxie, gained her angel wings. For 12 1/2 years, she was my constant furry companion and we were inseparable.

I keep ruminating on the day I got her- the first time I saw her sweet little face. It was love at first sight. It was a cold November evening in 2010 when I met her previous owner in the Wal-Mart parking lot after seeing a social media post entitled, “Full-blooded Palmeranian for sale.” Yes, they misspelled Pomeranian, but that detail is something I look at with love.

I contacted the owner and told her that I was interested in the little dog and she sent me a picture of her entitled, “This is Roxy.” The picture only sealed the deal. I changed the spelling of her name because I thought that dropping the y and adding the ie made the name more ladylike.

I met the girl that evening with the forty dollars she asked for. She then handed me the puppy and to see her sweet face for the first time in person, I loved her even more. The girl then handed me what was left of her puppy food and we parted ways.

I made a mad dash into Wal-mart to get a new leash, a large bag of puppy food, a bag of puppy snacks, a dog bowl, some puppy toys, and a dog bed. It was a cool November evening, so it was safe to leave her in my car. Twenty minutes later, I came back to the car, loaded the dog care items into the trunk, and drove her home.

As Roxie, grew, she became more and more beautiful- long hair, bushy tail, she was a beautiful little lady. I would take her on long walks. Also, I would take her outside and throw the ball for her to fetch. And she fetched it, then would come back, stop in front of me, and drop the ball on the ground.

She always slept pressed next to me on my bed. There wasn’t a night she didn’t sleep with me and I loved it when she’d follow me from room to room. I used to get down in the floor and play with her and make sure to give her lots of love and affection.

Roxie was my sidekick, my best friend. And though, in time, I may get another puppy, Roxie can never be replaced. No other pet will ever take her place in my heart. She was brilliantly smart and was an outgoing little dog and to see her and know her was to love her. She was very affectionate and would always jump on my lap and lick my face.

It’s going to be tough and I don’t how I’m going to get through this overwhelming sadness that fills my heart. Being without my baby is going to take a lot of getting used to. I do know that I will smile again eventually and I will remember her with a smile rather than tears and weeping.

Tonight, I held you one last time.

Rest easy my sweet Roxie. I will see you again in Heaven some day. 🐾🐾

November 8, 2010 – January 11, 2023

Survival Mode

Tippy toe, tippy toe, I must walk ever so carefully

While looking up to Heaven I plea prayerfully

Walking through this toxic place is like walking through a minefield

They see me as worse than Newman on an episode of Seinfeld

In glee the bullies watch as they smile with their eyes twinkling brightly

Their unsolicited advice is for me to tread lightly

Constantly watching and waiting for the other shoe to drop

No end in sight, not even a sign that the bullying will stop

Knowing in my gut that something’s about to pop off

If I didn’t have hope for my future, I’d bust some shots off

Angry and contemptful eyes narrowed into slits all around me

Watching, waiting, and anticipating the next juicy opportunity

Looking at me, watching me, with their breath just a-bating

Like ravenous vultures, they continue waiting and anticipating

My stomach turns, flips, and draws up in knots

As they gather ‘round to make their evil pot-shots

Holding my head high, I continue to walk this proverbial death march

Like a cornered cat in preparation for attack, I feel my back arch

“Walking the Mile, Walking the Mile, Walking the Green Mile”

I walk with a brave face through a cesspit nest of creatures so vile

Making a point to be careful not to disturb and stir the hornet’s nest

On high alert, I see nothing but red as I try my level best

Just to blend in, be safe by only being another face in the crowd

Look, look! There she is! Get her! Get her! They all yell aloud

Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, to escape this chilling cold

Forced, compelled, with no other choice but to live in survival mode

Pretty Privilege

Enjoy it while you have it

Because time in a thief

Youth is fleeting

And beauty fades

You’re no better than her

Only prettier

But what she lacks in looks

She makes up for in brains

Beauty’s only skin deep

Ugly is to the bone

Beauty’s only temporary

Stupid is permanent

Smarts is something you can stand on

Beauty, you can only fall back on

Enjoy it while you have it

Because time is a thief