Townies, Cronies, and Hayseeds II C3.9

When Brielle arrived at the nearby grocery store, Ruby’s Mad Dash Market, to pick up three packs of soft drinks, she noticed a woman who seemed familiar and looked exactly her age. Then suddenly, it hit her!

“Oh, my goodness! Raina?” Brielle called.

The strange lady turned around and sure enough, it was Raina, who had, luckily, been one of Brielle’s two trusted friends during high school. Like Brielle, Raina had also been bullied in school. The woman looked at Brielle.

“Well, you look familiar, but I can’t remember who you are,” Raina told her.

“I’m Brielle, from high school,” Brielle reminded her.

Raina’s eyes widened with shock at first, then she smiled.

“Brielle! Oh, my goodness! When did you get back!” she burst in excitement.

“About three weeks ago,” Brielle answered.

Raina and Brielle hugged.

“My God! It’s so good to see you again! How’ve you been?” Raina gushed.


“Now, you do know the class has got a 20-year reunion coming up. Right?”

“I didn’t know.”

“Yes. Actually, it’s going to be more of a multi-class reunion. The classes of 1999 to 2003. Are you coming?”

Reuniting with Her Best Friend from High School

“Nah! I don’t think so. It’ll probably be packed with people I’d rather not ever see again.”

“Oh, come on, Brielle. I’ll go if you go. I think most of them have grown up a little, I think. And if not, it’ll give you and me some time to catch up. There’s no law that says we have to hang with any of them.”

“Mmmm. Give me some time to think about it.”

After much cajoling, Raina managed to get Brielle to agree to go to the reunion with her.

When Brielle arrived back home with the drinks, Grandma Bennett had also arrived to have a look at Brielle’s new house.

“It’s absolutely adorable! You have a wonderful home, Brielle. Now, you and the kids can have a real home and live in peace for a change,” Grandma Bennett gushed.

Brielle hugged her grandma.

“I know, Grandma! And I’m so excited!”

Brielle passed out the drinks and the family visited until late. The night turned into a huge celebration as Brielle turned on her old Pioneer stereo, which was still working after thirty years.

Grandma Bennett had brought a platter of her to-die-for spicy fried chicken and homemade sour cream-flavored mashed potatoes with chives. She also had brought a pan of her scrumptious homemade buttermilk biscuits.

Upcoming Twentieth Class Reunion

Brielle’s mother and father brought a pot of greens, corn on the cob, and a cooked ham. As they all sat at the tables on the patio and ate, Brielle’s mother, Marcelle, spoke up.

“So, do you have any job prospects, Brielle?” she asked.

“I have a few,” Brielle answered, “I have an interview at the Boot Factory Tuesday morning. And they pay pretty good. They start out at eighteen dollars per hour. It’s not what I’m used to making in California, but the cost of living is a lot cheaper here, so, that’s a good thing,” Brielle said.

“Brielle, it’s about time you got a real job instead of dancing around half-naked in some club,” Grandma Bennett chimed in.

“Aaaa-MEN!” Brielle’s father agreed.

“Oh, come on, ya’ll. Not that again,” Brielle groaned.

“Sweetie, we love you and we know that you’re better than that. You’re smart, you’re creative- you got a good head on your shoulders,” Marcelle assured her daughter with a smile.

“Well, don’t worry. It’s not something I plan to do again. Believe me, dancing in gentleman’s clubs isn’t what it’s cracked up to be. And to be honest, you all, I never liked having to dance for a living. That job can be downright dangerous! I know one woman who was raped and murdered when a deranged customer followed her home one night. After that, I started planning my exit and my return home to my family.” Brielle admitted, “Before, I had been under the false belief that my looks were the only thing I had going for me, but after the murder and, as I’ve gotten older, I realize that there’s more to me than that and that I’m good for so much more,” Brielle admitted.

Turning Over a New Leaf

Although Brielle was optimistic about the future of herself and her children back home in Tennessee, she’d never worked in a factory before and the thought of it made her a little nervous. It was fear of the unknown. How would she fare working in a stifling factory as opposed to a strip club? She knew that the stage in those clubs could get pretty hot some nights due to all the lights and the exertion while dancing. However, the heat in a factory was much worse, so she’d been told.

Body Language Speaks Louder Than Words

Body Language Speaks Louder Than Words

Words have power, yes. But without the body language that goes with them, they’re only static- empty noise. The best way to ward off bullies is to influence them by transmitting the most appropriate and compelling nonverbal cues.

Around 80% of communication is nonverbal, we’ve often heard, and it’s the truth! Therefore, it’s not only necessary, but wise to pay closer attention to others in terms of body language. In other words, we must pay closer attention to pantomimes, which are their facial expressions, gestures, demeanor, and mannerisms.

Likewise, we should also pay close attention to the way we come off to people through our own nonverbals.

We Often Miss the Subtler Body Language

In other words, we not only need to learn to better read other’s body language but also to better monitor our own physical signals, so we don’t give others the wrong impressions. However, it’s not as easy as it looks. Many forms of body language are so subtle that we can miss them if we’re not careful.

Therefore, we must find ways to learn these micro-signals and what they mean. And once we do, we will gain mastery over our social situations.

If you’re stuck in an environment that’s peppered with bullies, the ability to read even the most subtle cues is a must. Bullies are masters at hiding their imperfections, their motives, and their intentions. Therefore, you must pick up on what they try to conceal, and you can only do it by correctly observing their most subtle cues and pantomimes.

Every movement, even the tiniest, from eye movements to gestures, holds a wealth of information. Moreover, every body position and stance also hold info. Everything people do or don’t do conveys a message. We are forever communicating.

Every Tiny Movement Conveys a Message

Therefore, you must be aware of it. And if you aren’t good at reading these silent subtleties, you must learn how. But here’s good news! The areas of intelligence we weren’t born with are those we can learn.

Even those who have high-functioning autism can study and learn these things to better improve their social lives. I’ve seen a few people on the spectrum do this and it helped them to change their situations and live better lives. As a result, they moved on to better relationships with family and to make good friends. They also went on to get married and have families of their own.

Therefore, we must learn the subtext of not only words, but also nonverbal signals. Subtext can be read in our choices of clothing to wear and in the way we arrange our furniture. Moreover, it can be read in the rise and fall of our voices when we speak. Each of us is a living, breathing open book to those who are expert people-readers.

The Importance of Subtext

Again, it’s imperative that you learn to read what people are thinking and feeling more accurately. This includes learning to pick on up their hidden motivations and intentions. Once you do, you will better be able to distinguish between who’s for real and who’s fake.

More importantly, this new knowledge will protect you from sneaky and nefarious people. It will also open you up to limitless opportunities! Also, in learning to transmit the right nonverbal signals, you will repel bullies, abusers, users, and other unsavory types of people. You will be able to bring down social barriers, build rapport with others, and build connections. Ultimately, it will help you become more fruitful in life and have confidence you never thought you’d have!

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Townies, Cronies and Hayseeds C3.8

Thirty minutes later, Petunia led Brielle into her office and Brielle sat in front of her desk. Petunia typed a few keys on the computer and the copier began running. Once the copier stopped, Petunia took the newly copied papers from the copier and sat back down, shuffling the papers. Brielle leaned forward.

“Would you take three hundred thousand dollars cash? Today?” Brielle asked politely.

Petunia’s eyes widened with shock.

“Come again?”

Brielle repeated the question.

“Wow! It’s not every day that we get a customer with kind of offer…or with that kind of money lying around to pay for a house outright.” Petunia replied, astonished.

“Well? Would you take it?”

Stan chuckled and scoffed before leaning back in his chair and folding his arms.

“If you’ve got that kind of cash laying around, you bet your sweet bottom dollar we’ll take it.” He said with a hint of sarcasm and hilarity.


Brielle flashed Stan a dirty look, then looked at Petunia. Petunia glared at Stan and mouthed, “shut up.” Stan quickly clammed up.

“Very well.” Brielle said as she opened her billfold and pulled out a cashier’s check in the amount of three hundred thousand dollars and handed it to Petunia.

Because Brielle had close to a million dollars saved up in a private bank account with only her name on the account, she was able to buy and pay for a house and ten acres of land in the country. While in California, Brielle had learned that with cash, you could always get superb deals! She knew that realtors were notorious for jumping through hoops to get that cold hard cash.

Judging from their demeaner, Brielle knew that Stan and Petunia Early, who were former classmates, hadn’t seen her in so long, they hadn’t recognize who she was. That would prove later to be a huge plus for Brielle.

Although Brielle knew who they were, she kept quiet about it. She wasn’t in any hurry to tell anyone in Thomasville who she was. Although they would all find out sooner or later, for now, she preferred to keep the fact that she’d gone to school with the two realtors quiet, since they were also two of her former bullies.

A Shocking Proposition

The asking price of the house was three hundred, fifty thousand, but with cash, Brielle was able to talk them down fifty thousand dollars. The two realtors agreed, took the cash, and signed over the deed before handing Brielle the keys to the house.

Later that afternoon, when Brielle arrived back at her grandmother’s house and announced the good news, both Jane and Olivia squealed with joy. Baby Kennedy sat in her highchair and babbled “na-na-na-na” as Grandma Bennett held a tiny spoon of baby food for Kennedy to take a bite.

“So, when do we move in?” Jane asked.

“I start moving our things tomorrow. We won’t move in until I buy our furniture and get the place situated.” Brielle told her.

Over the next two weeks, Brielle bought a newer-used BMW, new furniture, and electronics. And with the help of Grandma Bennett and her brothers Jesse, Joey, and Paul, she moved all the new furniture and what little furniture she’d come back with into the house.

As the adults worked hard, Baby Kennedy gurgled as she lay in her playpin on the patio. Jane and Olivia played fetch with Bandit, each taking turns throwing a rubber ball for the dog to run and catch.

Moving In and Getting Settled

The large collie loyally took the ball into his mouth, then ran back to the girls and dropped the ball in front of them. He then sat down and barked playfully at them, waiting for them to grab the ball and throw it again.

Jane grabbed the ball, then threw it again. Bandit took off after it.

The brothers also built a nice doghouse in the backyard, for Bandit. And the cousins; Tim, James, and Jerome, came and built a treehouse in the huge oak tree for Jane and Olivia.

By the time the work was done, the sun was getting low in the sky. Grandma Bennett, the brothers, cousins, and kids were all resting on the patio and sipping tea as they talked. Brielle got up.

“Would anyone like some soft drinks?” She asked.

“Sure!” Jesse chirped, “I could sure use a nice, cold can of co’cola!”

“Me too!” Jane added.

“Alright. Wait here while I make a run to the store and pick up a few packs of sodas.” Brielle told them, and she went into the house, grabbed her purse and keys, then left.

How Redundancy Backfires on Bullies

Have you noticed how bullies tend to repeat the same personal attacks over and over again? It’s true that a lie repeated a thousand times become truth. However, it can also have the opposite effect- it can become boring.

Sometimes, the attacks go on for so long, they become boring to the point that they actually lose their effect on the target…and everyone else. Why?

Because, instead of tapering off a bit once the attacks do have their desired effect, the bullies only increase them, trying to make absolute sure the labels stick. They want to ensure that others don’t forget how disgusting and revolting the target is.


But! What the bullies end up doing is repeating the same tired, worn-out lines and narratives that they end up losing support. In other words, it all backfires right in their faces.

Let Them Repeat, Repeat, Repeat!

This is good because the target now has leverage and can use it to their advantage.

If you are a target of bullying and your bullies are pulled this broken-record tactic, all you must do is to sit back and let your bullies do what they will do. You never know. They just might end up shooting themselves in the foot!

Then you get to smile as you watch them make complete fools of themselves. Also, you get to listen as people laugh at your bullies behind their backs. And, it you think they won’t dare laugh at the bullies, wrong. They may not do it to their faces, but trust me, they’ll go wild with the jokes and laughs behind the bullies’ backs. I guarantee it!

So, align yourself with those your bullies have bullied in the past. Enjoy listening to the ridicule as you laugh with your newfound friends and allies. Because that will be the fun part!

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Townies, Cronies and Hayseeds II C3.7

When Brielle arrived at the house the next day, Petunia Early, one of the realtors, was waiting in her car, parked in the driveway. Brielle had hired two independent inspectors to inspect the house after her first contact with the real estate company. Now that she knew that there were no cracks in the foundation and other issues with the house, Brielle was ready to tour the house.

When Brielle pulled up, Petunia got out of her car and the two women shook hands. Brielle recognized her immediately, she was formerly Petunia Iverson, one of her old classmates from high school.

Brielle had remembered her to be a passive-aggressive bully and had had many catfights with her. She wondered if Petunia had recognized her because it had been many years since she’d last seen her and Brielle’s appearance had changed over the years. Instead of the toothpick-skinny, dark haired, eyeglasses-wearing, geeky look she’d sported back in high school, Brielle was now a blonde who wore contact lenses and had an hourglass-shaped figure.

“Are you ready to go look inside?” Petunia asked excitedly.

“Absolutely.” Brielle answered.

Great Prospects

The house was a one story, light greyish-green, ranch-style home with a large front porch and huge picture window. It was a lovely-looking home that looked spacious and cozy. The house had a chimney, so Brielle knew it had a fireplace and she loved fireplaces.

The house also had a huge front and back yard with a shop in the back. It also had lots of trees and a white picket fence lined the property line of the three-acre estate. There were granny smith apple trees and plum trees in the back yard. There was a huge oak tree in the center of the backyard. There were also pecan trees. One of the pecan trees had an old tire swing tied to one of its huge branches. There was more than enough yard for the kids to play in.

Farther up the driveway stood a garage that was separate from the house and a cobblestone walkway that led from the garage to the side door of the house.

So far, Brielle loved what she saw outside. The two women walked up four cement steps to the porch. Petunia took the key, unlocked the door, and led Brielle inside the house.

A Home of Her Very Own

Brielle walked inside to see a specious living room and kitchen which were only separated by a long counter. The kitchen was big enough to be an eat-in kitchen and had a breakfast nook. She slowly made her way into the kitchen and looked at the appliances, opening the doors to each.

Petunia spoke up.

“As you can see, you have brand-new, stainless-steel appliances. A double-door refrigerator with icemaker. A dishwasher, stove, and built-in double oven. All are self-cleaning.” She informed Brielle.

Light beige carpet provided plushy softness to the living room floor and the kitchen had beautifully tiled floors. There was plenty of cabinet space, a pantry in the kitchen, and a door on the east wall of the kitchen led to a nice-sized washroom, complete with shelves and cabinets.

Once the two women were finished looking at the living room and kitchen, they went into a cozy-looking den where Brielle got to look at the fireplace and hearth. She loved what she saw.

Liking What She Sees

Once they were done viewing the den, Petunia led Brielle back through the living room, then down the hall. At the end of the hall was a door and when Petunia opened it, she led Brielle into the master suite, which included a large master bedroom, spacious master bath, and walk-in closet.

The bedroom was painted a light grey with white trim and ceiling. It had plenty of windows to let in plenty of sunlight and a set of French doors that led out onto a small deck.

When the ladies left the master suite, they went back into the hall and opened the next door. It was another bedroom not much smaller than the master bedroom but smaller, nevertheless. Brielle got to see the other two rooms which were smaller than the previous bedrooms they’d toured. They then checked out the second bathroom across the hall, which also had plenty of space but was smaller than the master bath.

Next, Petunia led Brielle back through the kitchen and back door and outside onto the back patio. They walked across the back yard to the shop and Brielle looked at the inside. The shop was big enough to park two cars inside and there were plenty of shelves and a fluorescent light overhead.

Ready to Make a Deal

Brielle turned and looked at Petunia.

“What did you say the asking price is?” She asked with a smile.

“Three fifty plus closing costs.” Petunia answered.

“I like it.”

“Great! Let’s go back to the office and we’ll hatch a deal for you.”

Why Write About Bullying and Abuse?

I’ve mentioned the importance of documenting the bullying you suffer and why you should do it. Writing about it indeed helps you to purge all those toxic emotions. However, the reasons go much deeper than what I’ve mentioned before.

Just as the pen is mightier than the sword. It is also mightier than the mouth.

Writing is so much better than talking. Speaking about bullying and abuse through the pen is so much more powerful because you can speak freely and without interruption.

No one can try and stop you from speaking your truth when you use the almighty pen. They can’t talk over you nor shout you down. No one can gaslight nor blame you. They can’t name call you nor throw guilt trips on you to distract you.

Unlike speaking to another person face to face and having to share the conversation, you can write alone, in private. When you communicate through writing, there’s no need to worry about anyone becoming combative. Whereas, during a face-to-face confrontation, an abusive bully is likely to become irate and more abusive as a reaction to being called out.

Bullies despise it when you put them on front street.

Writing about it is much safer. Because your writing is yours and yours alone. Therefore, you can pour your heart out freely on paper and no one can bother you. Bullies can’t demand that you take back your words. They can’t control what you say. There’s absolutely nothing they can do to stop you from speaking out about the pain and suffering they inflicted.

All they can do is attack you after the words are already written, published, and read by many pairs of eyes. And, by then, it’s too late. The cat’s already out of the bag.

And here’s the best part! In their explosive reactions and retaliatory attacks, they only prove that everything you wrote about them is true. They confirm themselves to be exactly as you described them.

Therefore, let them attack you. Let them retaliate and seek revenge. Permit them to call you what they like. Your bullies can scream, shout, curse, plot, and be as passive-aggressive as they want.

Smile when they shoot you a dirty looks in the supermarket. Chortle when they whisper behind your back at the doctor’s office.  Laugh to yourself and stare back when they stop and stare you down on the street.

Understand that it’s far better to draw first blood then to be on the defense.

Why? Because, in doing these childish things, they only make you more believable. They only expose themselves and the evil deeds they committed.

Moreover, some people are still mad at you because of the evil things they did to you. Think about it. They need to stay pissed at you so they can keep from feeling so dirty and sleezy. And they’re even angrier at you because you wouldn’t be destroyed. They hate you because you did the opposite of what they expected. You refused to sink. You didn’t crash and burn. Instead of drowning, you only went airborne and soared to unimaginable heights!

Know that you’re the winner here.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Townies, Cronies and Hayseeds II C3.6

At just before seven the next morning, Brielle awoke to the stirring of baby Kennedy, who gurgled next to her, and to the mouth-watering smells of breakfast cooking and coffee brewing in the kitchen downstairs. Bandit was curled up on the bed by her feet, wide awake. He sniffed the air, then licked his chops before starting to pant.

Brielle crawled out of bed, took the baby in her arms, then tiptoed down the hall, peering into the room where Jane and Olivia were. The two girls were still sound asleep.

She carried the baby downstairs, with Bandit following close behind, and went into the kitchen to see Grandma Bennett in front of the stove cooking pancakes and sausage. Grandma Bennett, dressed in her granny gown, robe and house shoes, looked up and smiled.

“Well, good morning, sunshine.” She greeted, “How’d you sleep last night?”

First morning home

“Like a baby. Kennedy didn’t even wake up once. She was out like a light too.” Brielle answered.

“Long trips will sure take it out of you.” Grandma Bennett said.

“Tell me about it.” Brielle agreed.

Brielle grabbed her cellphone from her pocket and checked it. She gasped when she saw how many times Bill had tried to call. She noticed that his last attempt was at four a.m.

“Good grief!” Brielle sighed.

“What’s the matter?” Grandma Bennett asked.

“Bill was blowing up my phone. ‘Tried to call fifteen times last night and this morning. It’s a good thing I turned off my ringer. We never would’ve gotten to sleep.”

A desperate caller.

Grandma Bennett’s eyebrows shot up.

“Fifteen times! What in the world is wrong with that man! Lord, I declare! There’s something wrong with him!” She cried.

“Yep. There is.” Brielle said, shaking her head, “I just don’t want to talk to him right now. I know he’s not just calling for the girls. He’s calling to find out where we are.”

“Doggone right, he is!”

It was Sunday and besides attending church services with Grandma Bennett, Brielle rested, still recovering from the long time home.

The following day was Monday. After feeding the baby, the dog, and herself, Brielle rose from the table after breakfast.

“I’ve got to go set up an account at the bank and then get information on that 4-bedroom house down the road. It seems like it would be a good place for me and the kids.”

“Just make sure you don’t do a fool’s rush in. Have the place inspected before you buy it.” Grandma advised.

“Will do, Grandma.” Brielle said as she took the baby upstairs.

Starting Over

After getting dressed in a nice pair of jeans, light summer blouse with shoulder holes in it and sneakers, Brielle straightened her hair and put on her makeup. When she came downstairs, the girls had awoken and were eating in the kitchen.

“’Morning, sweeties.” Brielle greeted as she kissed each of the girls. She turned to Grandma Bennett.

“Grandma, I’ve got to run. Girls, you behave for Grandma. Okay?”

She kissed her grandmother and gave one more kiss to the girls, then left.

Hearing the motor of Brielle’s Escalade crank, Jane looked at Grandma Bennett.

“Where’s Mom headed?” She asked.

“She’s got to run to the bank and then check out a house she saw advertised in the real-estate section of the newspaper last night. I think she’s going to be gone a while. She’s got to get you all established in a new town and that takes a while.” Grandma Bennett answered.

“Wow! What kind of house?” Olivia asked.

“It’s a 4-bedroom house down the road from here. ‘Seems to be a good place for you all. If she gets the house, you’ll be within walking distance from here, so you’ll be close to family.”

“Cool!” Olivia shouted.

The next day, Brielle called and made an appointment with the real estate company that was selling the house. She also called an inspector to inspect the home for cracks in the foundation, bad wiring, and such.

A New Home

The following week, Brielle’s parents arrived at Grandma Bennett’s house after their honeymoon. Seeing that Brielle and the kids had returned home from California, the look of pleasant shock flashed across their faces.

Jane and Olivia excitedly came running out of the house when John and Marcelle Bennett pulled into the driveway in their metallic maroon Ford F150 quad-cab. They got to the truck before the grandparents had time to get out of the truck!

“Granny! Grampy!” Jane and Olivia shouted excitedly.

“Oh, my goodness! Jane! Olivia!” Brielle’s parents squealed from inside the truck.

As the grandparents saw them, they smiled as they got out of the truck. They each gave the excited girls long hugs and lots of kisses.

“Well, Jane! You’re growing into such a beautiful young lady!” Marcelle said as she hugged her, then took her by the shoulders and looked at her.

“I’m thirteen now.” Jane said in excitement.

“A teenager! It seems like only yesterday you were just a six-pound little rat I held in my arms at the hospital in California! We flew there just to be there when you were born!” Our first grandchild! We just had to be there!” John told Jane as he took his turn hugging her and kissed her on the cheek.

He then hugged and kissed Olivia.

Brielle came out of the house with Kennedy on her hip, followed by Grandma Bennett. She waited until the kids got their love from her parents before passing the baby to her mother for kisses and love.

Happy Reunion

“Oh, she’s getting so big! She was such a tiny thing when you and Bill came here back in March!” Brielle’s mother Marcelle gushed.

“I’m just sorry we didn’t stay longer. Bill only wanted to stay for three days. I barely had a chance to visit everyone.” Brielle said.

“It’s okay, honey. We understand. Bill’s always been a demanding old drip.” Marcelle replied.

“Well, Bill’s no longer an issue. I left him and I’m not going back. I’m home for good this time, Mom.”

Marcelle’s mouth dropped in shock, then a huge smile spread across her face. She put her arms around Brielle and hugged her tightly.

“Welcome home, baby! I’ve been waiting so long for this day to come because I know how badly he treated you and these children.” She said softly.

“I gotta set an example for my girls, Mama. I have to teach them that they don’t have to stay in a relationship that hurts them, and they don’t have to take abuse from a man, ever!” Brielle replied.

“I’m so proud of you, sweetie! I always knew that you would eventually get tired of his crap. I didn’t know when, but I knew that eventually, you’d get enough of it.” Marcelle told her, “I’d get damn mad at you sometimes, but I’ve always believed in you.”

Brielle’s Strength

“Thank you, Mom. I’m so glad to be home!” Brielle said with tears in her eyes.

“What are you doing tomorrow morning?” Marcelle asked.

“I have an appointment at the realtors’ in the morning.” Brielle answered, “I’m looking at buying a house for me and the kids.”

“Oohhh! I didn’t know.”

“It’s okay. I’m not rich, but I’m not broke by a long shot. I figure that I might as well go ahead and buy a home while I have the money to do so.”

Grandma Bennett came out onto the front porch.

“Well? Is anybody up for some pot roast, steamed potatoes, and carrots tonight?” She called out.

“Sounds great!” Jesse called back.

Why Bullies Usually End Up Eating Their Own

Bullies want to have a target or a victim. In fact, they need targets. To feel almighty and powerful, bullies must have people to dominate and subjugate. And having power over is extremely addictive to them. It’s like a drug. It’s why bullies repeatedly bully their targets over a a long period of time, years even. Because that “drug” wears off rather quickly and it won’t be long before your bullies come back for their next “fix.”

However, what happens when you finally realize who your bullies really are behind the tough facades, they put up? What happens when the masks fall off, and your bullies’ cowardice and insecurity come to light? Oooo! This is beginning to sound delicious, isn’t it?

Here’s what happens. Once the target sees these revelations, his confidence will get a big boost. The target will realize that she isn’t and never was the one with the issues. In this, he will find that it was the bullies who had the issues all along. Then, the target will finally have the courage to give the bullies the old proverbial middle finger and tell them all to go eat a fat one.

Moreover, the power dynamic will take a sudden shift and the scales will automatically tip in the target’s favor. In other words, the person will be a target no more. Remember that the best way to disempower bullies is to empower targets.

Because, once the target ceases to be a target, bullies no longer have power over him. Therefore, the bullies must go search for another target.

The Sudden Power Shift

When these bullies spot several potential targets, they’ll test the waters by performing several tests on these “potentials.” They will test these potential targets by watching them closely and launching subtle attacks and insults just to see how they react. But! What will the bullies do next, when things don’t go quite the way they expect? What happens when the potentials also give them the double middle finger?

Uh-oh, now they can’t find someone they can target! Curses! Now, what’s a poor bully to do? Simple. They begin eating their own. In other words, they turn on a member of their in-group.

That’s right, ladies and gentlemen! Once the bullying in-group runs out of targets on the outside, they have no choice but to turn their bullying inward and start bullying people within their group.

Remember that bullies need a target victim. They need someone to dominate and subjugate to have power because they can’t get power any other way. Without someone to ride roughshod over, to tell what to do, and to exert control over, bullies feel powerless. And you know what? They are!

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Townies, Cronies and Hayseeds II C3.5

Privacy security or safeguard diagram or flowchart written on a dry erase board as tips, advice or information on making your personal, sensitive data safe and secure

Brielle had just fed and burped the baby and laid her asleep in her play pin. She then sat down to eat when suddenly, her cellphone began to ring with the song, “These Boots Are Made for Walking” by Nancy Sinatra for her ringtone. She had selected the ringtone specifically as the ringtone for Bill’s number that afternoon because she knew that Bill would call just as soon as he’d gotten home and found that she and the girls were gone, and Brielle’s things were missing.

Grandma Bennett looked at her from across the table.

“It’s Bill, isn’t it?” She asked.

Jesse stood up with a serious look on his face.

“Nobody but.” Brielle replied.

She continued to let the phone ring.

“Well, are you going to answer it?” Jesse asked.

“I don’t know if I should. I left him the new number in case he wanted to talk to the kids.” Brielle said.

“You gave that monster your new number? Brielle, what in the heavens were you thinking?” Grandma Bennett asked in an annoyed tone.

“He’s the girls’ father, Grandma. I can’t just cut him out completely. And you don’t know him. He’s vindictive as hell. He’ll use this to tell the courts that I’m keeping him for seeing the girls- violating his rights as a father.”

His rights? What about your rights to be safe and not to be harmed? What about the girls’ rights not to be harmed?” Joey asked angrily.

“I know, Joey. But that won’t carry much weight with Bill. He doesn’t care.”

As they talked, Bandit, curled up on the floor under the table, panted and his ears perked up. The phone finally stopped ringing after the sixth ring. Then began ringing again. After Bill attempted to call for the third time, Brielle turned off her ringer.

“You don’t think he’ll show up here, do you?” Amy asked.

“He better not show up here!” Paul thundered.

“Damn right! We’ll give him a welcome wagon he’ll never forget!” Jesse promised in a threatening tone.

Brielle snickered.

“Alright, knock it off!” Grandma Bennett ordered, “You boys stop crowin’! He’s not going to come all the way here.”

“You think not? Grandma, somebody like him could hop on a plane and be here in a matter of hours.” Jerome said.

“I don’t think so.” Grandma said, “I don’t think he’s that stupid.”

“Oh, Lord, I hope not.” Brielle sighed.

“Well, Grandma. We’ve got to go home and retire.” Jesse told Grandma Bennett as he leaned down and kissed her. Each of the guys kissed Grandma Bennett, Brielle and each of the girls and baby before they gathered their wives and children and left for their houses.

Now, it was just Brielle, Grandma Bennett, the girls, and baby in the house. Brielle rose from the table.

“Come on, girls. Let’s get ready for bed.” Brielle called.

After the girls were in bed, Brielle and Grandma Bennett sat up and talked. Grandma Bennett picked up her coffee mug, took a sip, and set it down on a folded napkin on the table.

“So, what happened between you and Bill, Brielle. What did he do this time?” She asked.

“He’s just got a volatile temper. He just can’t control his temper. And he thinks he owns me and the girls. He treats us more like his property than his family.” Brielle explained.

“He hit you again, didn’t he?” Grandma Bennett pressed.

“Yes. He hit me, Grandma. But never again. Because I left for good this time. I need to be happy. The girls need to be happy, and they need to live in peace. I must teach them that it’s not okay for a man to hit you and this is how I do it. I have to be an example for my girls.” Brielle continued.

“That’s right, Brielle. And I’m so proud of you for leaving that scumbag! Just don’t go back to him. Don’t let him talk you into- “

“Don’t worry, Grandma. I won’t. I’m done with him. I don’t even love him anymore.”

“I’m glad to hear it. You deserve better than him, Brielle. You deserve to be happy for once.”

“You’re right. I do. And so, do the girls.”

Brielle than got up, then she turned back around and looked at Grandma Bennett.

“Oh, by the way, do you have this week’s newspaper lying around somewhere? I need to look in the classifieds and the real estate ads. I want to see about buying a place for me and the girls and start looking for a job soon.”

“Sure. This week’s newspaper is lying on the counter. I just got through reading it.” Grandma Bennett answered as she pointed to the counter with the newspaper folded on top of it.

Brielle picked it up and learned against the counter as she read it.

“It says here that there’s a 4-bedroom house for sale a few miles down the road from here. It’s in the country where it’s peaceful and quiet.” Brielle said as she continued to read.

“That’s the old Hancock Place. It’s been up for sale for over two years, and they can’t seem to sell it.” Grandma Bennett told her.

“I wonder why.”

“Because they wanted too much for it. The realtors have since brought down the price a little and they still can’t sell the place.”

“I’d like to call the realtors in the morning to set up an appointment. Then I want to go look for a job. It’s ten o’clock so I need to get to bed so that I can get up bright and early. Thanks again, Grandma.” Brielle said sweetly.

She then leaned down and kissed her grandmother on the cheek.

“Goodnight, Sugar. I’ll see you in the morning.” Grandma Bennett said.

“You Can’t…”

Bullies say you’ll never prevail

They repeat that you’ll always fail

“You can’t do this, and you can’t have that”

Be careful or their words will lay you flat

They say, “Try as you might but it’s no use”

That no matter what you do, you’ll forever lose

That winning is something you’ll never do

That success is for anyone who isn’t you

Turn toward them and their words a deaf ear

Replace their words with words of cheer

Then you’ll surpass them by leaps and bounds

And drown out the yelps of those mangy hounds

You’ll leave them behind to drown in distress

As you climb and reach the pinnacle of success

Bullies, Cowards, and Chumps

independent 20s girl with threatening body language

Have you noticed that bullies love to talk smack? They trumpet to the world about how tough they are and that, in so many words, everyone else should bow down and tremble in their presence.

Bullies work hard at beating their chests and bluffing. It only goes to prove that they’re the least confident and most insecure schmucks on the face of the earth. In other words, anyone who must announce that they’re tough, smart, awesome, take your pick, can’t be.

In contrast, people who do have any of these qualities are usually the quiet ones. They don’t have to talk about it. How many times have you heard stories about the quiet kid beating the crap out of the loudmouth bully who pushed him too far?

Genuinely tough people never talk. You don’t see these people running around, spouting off about how tough they are because they don’t have to. They don’t need to tell you about it because they already know they’re tough and there’s no need to prove it to anyone. They’ve already proven it to themselves and that’s enough.

Bluffs, Blowhards, and Windbags

Therefore, if any bully messes with them, they will get hurt.

I’ve dealt with thousands of people of this caliber and one thing I noticed a long time ago is that they’re loudmouth losers. They puff out their chests and flap their lips, talking about how they’re going to kick this person’s butt, whip that person’s butt- they never stop. With these chumps, it’s one pissing contest after another.

As a result, having to constantly listen to their gas gets boring real fast. Why? Because, again, that’s all you hear out of them. Anyone who must spit such rubbish isn’t only trying to convince the rest of the world, they’re also trying to convince themselves.

These are characteristics of every single chump who has ever bullied me in my lifetime. It’s not only pathetic, but laughable that they must go through life this way.

Furthermore, these people are so incredibly insecure that you can trigger them and set them off by challenging their toughness, popularity, intelligence, or what have you. Their egos are just that fragile.

These bullies may even approach you and get in your face if they have their entourage of lackeys behind them.

If you’re a target of bullying, know this. Your bullies are total fakes. They’re phonies. Cowards. Chumps!

When you stop and think about it, it’s hard to hate anyone who is this pathetic. They only thing you can do is feel sorry for such pitiful souls.

Again, remember that those who are genuinely tough don’t have to talk about it. It’s just there.

Always remember this the next time a bully shoots his mouth off at you or gets in your face. Feel confident in knowing that you’re not like this person and you don’t have to resort to such buffoonery. This alone should be a real self-esteem booster.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Townies, Cronies, and Hayseeds II C3.4

Back in California, Bill pulled into the driveway in his BMW. Noticing that Brielle’s vehicle was gone, he got out slowly then paused and stared at the empty space in the driveway with an annoyed look on his face. He then looked around.

Bill took his briefcase out of the trunk. After closing the trunk, he went to the front door, unlocked it, and went inside the house. He dropped his briefcase when he took one look around the house and realized that not even the dog was there. He also noticed that Brielle’s recliner was missing as were the baby’s play pin, toys, and Brielle’s pictures of her family and a few pictures of the girls.

An Unpleasant Surprise

Bill then raced upstairs, into the master bedroom and jerked open the door to the walk-in closet. Brielle’s clothes were missing. He then darted into the bathroom. Sure enough, Brielle’s makeup and toiletries were also missing.

Next, he ran into the girl’s rooms and noticed that they were completely empty, no beds, no vanities, no computers, no desks, no pictures, no toys or nick-nacks. Nothing. He burst into the baby’s room. Again, nothing. Jane’s, Olivia’s, and the baby’s rooms were all empty and bare.

After making a mad dash down the stairs, Bill went into the kitchen and found three cellphones lying on the counter- Brielle’s, Jane’s, and Olivia’s. In a rage, Bill picked up one of the phones and, with a scream of fury, hurled it through the window in the patio door.

A Dear John Letter

He then found a note on the far counter by the stove and picked it up. It read:


I have been doing a lot of thinking over the last few months. Things haven’t been good between us for a long time now and I think that it’s time to end our marriage and go our separate ways. The girls and I deserve to be happy, and we haven’t been because all you do is hurt us. Well, I won’t let you hurt us anymore. I’m determined for us to be happy, and I’ve come to the conclusion that we’ll be much happier without you.

Don’t worry. You can still come see the girls. I won’t keep them from you. But we just can’t live with you anymore. I wish you all the best in life. Know that I’ll always care about you. You’re the father of my children. But I’m not in love with you anymore. Little by little, you killed that love with each slap, each punch in my face, each time you called me a bitch, and each time you verbally assaulted me. And now it stops.

You go on with your life and let me and the girls go on with ours. That’s all I ask of you.



  1. Here’s my new number if you need to talk to the girls.



Bill took the letter, crumpled it up, and threw it across the kitchen.

“Goddammit!” He screamed, “That bitch!”

He then picked the crumpled letter back up and straightened it out. Next, he read it again, took out his cellphone and dialed the number written in the letter.

Heide’s Story of Survival

Child abuse with the eye of a young boy or girl with a single tear crying due to the fear of violence or depression caused by hunger and poverty and being afraid of bullying at school.

This is my story—of oppression, of getting through, of moving on—my survival story.
Looking back on the events of my life, I realize that the hurt I’ve dealt with was due to extreme neglect as a child. Our parents’ loved their children to the best of their ability; however, my mother suffered from major depression, to the point where she was slowly giving up on life. And, in my father’s case, his own father had left him when he was young.
A Survivor of Neglect
No one had taught my mother and father how to be good parents. As a child, I had very little to no supervision. My mother was very carefree with us. One memory I retain was when I was four years old. I was swimming in a lake, and a neighbor frantically called my mom to let her know I was out there.
My mother’s response was to ask her to just send me home. To this day, my family and I laugh about it, but looking back, it was extremely neglectful on my mother’s part.
As I started school, kids were very mean. I was teased, spat on; I was not picked for teams in gym, and I often sat alone at lunch. Teachers would not say anything to stop it. I felt scared to go to school and terrified to ride the bus. I truly hated elementary and middle school. I hardly had any friends, and the ones I thought were my friends were often two-faced.
In seventh grade, I was at a friend’s house, in her basement, and a girl with rings on physically beat me up, holding me down and punching me repeatedly in the face. There was a boy watching and swinging a knife around, laughing. Then I had to walk two miles home in the dark, alone, after being beat up. When I got home, my mother was lying in bed, asleep, with no idea I hadn’t been home.
Inner Strength In Spite of Her Bullied Past

Looking back, I was severely neglected, and it wasn’t a nurturing, caring living environment. When my mother was not working, she was sleeping. Now and then she did things to take care of us, but most of the time, we ran the streets and fended for ourselves.
Sadly, she passed away from breast cancer when I was thirteen.
Over the years of neglect, I developed many insecurities.
I now realize the trauma I dealt with made it difficult to socialize with other children as well. My sisters and I came from a poor upbringing, and I truly believe that is one of the reasons as to why I was made fun of and rejected growing up.
Many years later, I was diagnosed with ADD/OCD and anxiety. I had these brain-based challenges my entire life but did not realize it at the time.
The Effects of Trauma
OCD/ADD causes individuals to be impulsive, to have less patience around others, and to overthink everything. These tendencies can cause people to react to you in a way you may not deserve, but it’s unfortunately a result of struggling with mental health issues.
These issues were key as to why I heavily grieved over losing my mother, why I chose relationships that kept me feeling “vulnerable,” and why I always felt so alone.
I even allowed my ex-husband to control everything in our marriage. I wanted to feel safe, but this led to various forms of abuse. In 2015, I became a single mother, and even though I was scared of failing and struggled financially, I had to learn how to do everything on my own. Though difficult, I became a strong woman and a mother, and I was finally happy.
positive bullied victim says NO
These foundations of my identity, as well as my faith, helped me feel secure and that true hope could be fulfilled. To this day, I still struggle with self-esteem issues, anxiety, and some seasonal depression; however, I choose to see other people’s needs instead of focusing on my own negative emotions.
The Courage to Leave an Abusive Marriage
My goal is to use my past hurts to bring them hope. I have a motto for myself: “I’m the glass half full kinda girl.”
Year ago, when I shared my story, others would often say, “I don’t remember you being bullied, when/who bullied you?” Questions like these caused me to question the validity of the pain I felt and made me think I had no right to use the word “abuse/bullied” to describe my pain.
However, as I dealt with all of the denial, anger, blame, sadness, and grief over the years, I realized I indeed had the right to feel everything I did, and no person could take that away from me.
That emotional strength and security has made me want to make a positive out of EVERY negative. Recently, I reached out to the girl that beat me up in the seventh grade and I reminded her of the events that happened. She did not even remember and explained how much hurt she was going through at the time.
She apologized, I told her I forgave her, and now we are friends and talk from time to time. So you see, I chose to use my pain to inspire others and show them that there IS hope, no matter what you go through in life.
Sometime it is as simple as saying hello to random people on the street, calling others by their names, making sure to wear a smile often, and going out of my way to be a friend to ANYONE who needs one. This is especially important to me, since I lost my brother in 2018 to suicide.
I know I suffered a lot of loss and hardships in life, but I know that others have suffered quite a lot more. We all experience different things, and what’s important is not how others think we’ve lived, but instead how we ourselves experience life.
I TRULY believe if I can share—or sing, a passion of mine—my story and save a life or even inspire one person, then it makes it worth going through all of this pain and coming out the other side.
A Passion for Music
Heide has a lovely singing voice! You can check out her single, “Bulletproof,” here!

When Bullies Label You “Mentally Ill”

When people label you “mentally ill,” “crazy,” “unhinged,” take your pick, based on the lies of bullies; no one has to take you seriously ever again. People will automatically doubt everything you do, good or bad. Anytime society sticks a person with the “mentally imbalanced” label, it can be worse than if they deemed them a criminal. Because at least people take criminals, even murderers and rapists more seriously. What a crying shame!

Therefore, when bullies can con an entire community into deeming you crazy, they can make you disappear and become irrelevant. And they can do it even after you’re dead.

The most insidious thing about this label is that it can make the labelled person doubt their own sanity. In other words, it’s not so much that they think you’re crazy, it’s that they want you to believe it. Why? Because, if they can make you believe it, then you’re more likely to live up to it.

Further, the crazy card is the easiest for bullies to play. Although they can never prove you’re a basket case, there’s no way you can prove that you aren’t one.

The label, “crazy” is worse than the label, “criminal.”

This is why the crazy label is the most widely used among bullies and society as a whole. Also, it’s the most common form of gaslighting. “Crazy” can be used as a last resort when bullies run out of options and can’t pin anything else on you.

Think about it. They can’t as easily label you a whore if you haven’t slept around. Just the same, they can’t as easily label you a criminal if you don’t have a police record to prove it. And they can’t easily label you a thief if you never took anything that wasn’t yours.

Whereas, you can’t as easily disprove crazy.

Therefore, the more we understand the ins, outs, and reasons behind the use of this label, the better we can defend against it.

The best thing you can do in this situation is to keep your head and continue showing them up. It may take a while, but eventually, the label does get old and wear itself out. And when that happens, it will lose it’s effect.

With knowledge comes empowerment!