This is How to Distinguish Between Being Alone and Being Lonely

Being alone means being in solitude- being by yourself. When you’re alone, you’re without the company of others. Being lonely, on the other hand, means having feelings of abandonment- being sad due to being isolated and alienated from others.

Alone is a state of being. Whereas, loneliness is a state of mind. An emotion. You can be in a room full of people and though you may not be alone, you can be lonely. It’s not about the number of people around you, it’s about how you feel.

When you’re alone, you can be happy. When you’re lonely, you can’t.

Being alone is sometimes beneficial because it allows you to focus on a project without disruption and makes concentration so much easier. So, you can be alone without necessarily being lonely. And everyone needs a little bit of “me-time” every day!

Being alone is being at home by yourself and enjoying a good book.
Being lonely is that dull ache in your chest after you’ve lost a family member or been thrown under the bus by your friends.

Here’s how to beat that awful feeling of loneliness:

1. Concentrate on your hobbies. Do something you enjoy doing- preferably something that takes a little concentration and consumes some time.

2. Get up and move. Exercise works wonders and has a way of producing endorphins that make you feel good. Dancing to some good music is a great picker-upper!

3. Do a home-improvement project. Clean out your garage or declutter your closets.

As you know, I was bullied for six long years in school. But I also had hobbies that distracted me from some of the loneliness.

My writing and art projects at home were one of the ways I survived those lonely years. They made things a lot more bearable and when I’d finish a project, that feeling of accomplishment I’d get would always supersede any feeling of abandonment I felt!

Never fear being alone. Too many people think that because you’re alone, it means you’re lonely. It doesn’t!

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Targets of Bullying Should Never Act from Neediness

Refraining from acting needy can be hard to do, especially if you’re a target of bullying. The feelings of loneliness and desperation are real, and they can have a death-grip on you after so long. Remember that humans are hardwired for social connections and relationships and it’s not easy to fight the urge to cling to unhealthy relationships and friendships when you’re treated like an outcast.

However, acting clingy and needy only invites more bullying, abuse, and usery. It also opens the door for ridicule. It also makes you a target of disgust and contempt. Yes, a few people may even feel sorry for you, but do you really want to be pitied? Ewww! I sure wouldn’t!

Moreover, it gives the bullies satisfaction and free entertainment. The last thing you want is to look desperate in front of them and humiliate yourself.

Again. I understand that feeling of not having any friends. I understand the longing for friends and human connections. I understand the longing to be noticed and to have your voice heard. And I understand that deep ache in your soul when people ostracize you because, once upon a time, I felt the intense psychopathic hate of my classmates and the resulting soul-deep pain.

However, I learned the heard way that, if nothing else, you still have your pride and your dignity, and you either choose to keep those treasures or give them away. And if you give them away like I did for a time, the good news is that you can always take them back anytime.

How you take it all back is to cut these life-leeches out off your life and make them irrelevant. You also take it back by speaking your truth and taking the abuse they inflicted on you to help others.

You turn your pain into power!

You turn your bullies’ weaknesses into your strength!

Your bullies’ ignorance becomes your wisdom!

You turn their hatred for you into love for others, especially those who are bullied.

And that’s how you overcome! That’s how you go “From Victim to Victor!”

With knowledge comes empowerment!