‘Want to know how to spot gaslighting at work, especially if it happens to you? Here are the classic indicators of workplace gaslighting so that you can know when it’s time to to update your resume and plan your escape before your job and entire career take a huge hit.
Gaslighting at work is no joke. If you’ve been on the receiving end of it like I have, you’re wondering how you spot it and know when it’s time to carefully plan your resignation and transition to a new job with a better company.
You will learn about all the signs of gaslighting at work so that you can better protect yourself against it.
After learning about all these surefire indicators, you will be better equipped to make the decision whether to dust off your resume and get out of that toxic work environment.
This post is all about gaslighting at work. This post will give you the symptoms that every job applicant and employee with any integrity should know about
Gaslighting at work: Signs to watch for
Gaslighting is gaslighting regardless of where it happens. It is a type of manipulation to make its target doubt their own sanity or feel/seem crazy.
Although it happens at home and at school, it can also happen in the workplace. As with all gaslighters, workplace bullies gaslight their victims to avoid accountability for their own behavior. So, what are the signs?
1. The person doing the gaslighting is usually someone higher up.
When gaslighting happens at work, the people doing it are usually supervisors or those in management who use it to abuse the employees under them. In many cases, these unscrupulous authority members use charm and deceit to do their gaslighting. Therefore, it can be hard to spot it while it’s happening.
Supervisors and managers will often use their position of power and authority as leverage. This serves to discourage the employees who work under them from challenging them or reporting their abuse.
Also, the gaslighted employee is more than likely suffering workplace bullying and mobbing. Workplace bullying can add so much stress on an employee that they may be unable to think straight. And, when you cannot think straight, it’s even harder to identify gaslighting in real time.
People in authority are more inclined to gaslight in the workplace simply because of their authority. Why? Because they know that the word of a bottom of the hierarchy employee doesn’t carry much weight in the workplace.
Also, bottom employees face bigger threats of job loss and career ruination than those in positions of power.
In most cases of Gaslighting at work, IT’s not about right and wrong. It’s about Hierarchy.
Understand that in any case of workplace bullying, mobbing, or gaslighting, it’s not about right and wrong. It’s about hierarchy. Therefore, the unspoken message is this.
“We’re in charge, you’re not, so, we can beat our chests and get away with it. And your best bet is to shut up and take the abuse or quit and go somewhere else. Good luck with that, by the way! You still have to list us as a work reference. So, not only can we fire your butt, we can also block you from getting future employment anywhere else.”
Sadly, there are some truly psychotic managers out there and they’re a force to be reckoned with.
However, it is still possible to spot gaslighting if you remain calm and know what to look for. If you are being gaslighted by a boss, your best recourse will most likely to first, gather your evidence.
Next, you quietly secure another job with a different company and put in your two-week or thirty day notice of resignation. Finally, once you leave, you’re free to sue the pants off the company. That is, IF, you have sufficient evidence to do so.
2. the gaslighter in charge is vague in their instructions.
Bullies use vagueness as a weapon. Bully bosses are always vague in their instructions. Understand that they do this deliberately. It’s a slick way for them to withhold information that’s vital to an employee’s job performance.
Moreover, workplace bullies do this in order to make the employees they despise look incompetent. Remember this. If you ever find yourself on the wrong side of a bully boss, you can be sure that they will be looking for any excuse to fire you.
Therefore, look for them to be as vague as possible when they give you instructions on how to perform your job. In other words, they will intentionally leave out important details. Later, they will admonish you harshly, in front of an audience, to humiliate you and make you look like a moron. This is just another form of gaslighting at work.
When this happens to you, I would highly suggest that you get out your resume and look for employment somewhere else. You want to do this before things get worse. And believe me, they are about to get worse, much worse.
Therefore, it’s better to go ahead and head it off now before it escalates into something that could destroy your career.
3. gaslighting in the workplace also includes a disregard of company policy.
For instance, if an employee the bully boss doesn’t like gets hurt on the job and files a report. The supervisor will accidentally-on-purpose forget to send it through the proper channels.
Then, he will accuse the injured employee of failing to report an on-the-job accident. Therefore, this provides the evil boss just another excuse to get rid of the employee.
And who’s the upper management going to believe? The employee or the supervisor? I think you already know the answer to that question.
This is why you should always make copies of the accident report if you ever get injured on the job. You will save yourself a truckload of trouble.
Again, gather your own evidence and plenty of it. Then, when another job opportunity comes open, get the hell out of there. Once you leave that hell-hole and you’re clear of any of the bullies, then haul them into court if you have satisfactory evidence to do it.
4. moving the goalposts is another form of gaslighting at work.
Understand that if you’re on the wrong side of a workplace bully in a position of power and you are lucky enough to reach a company goal, your bully boss will move the goalposts. They do this on purpose to make you look slow.
Though you may exceed goals time and time again, realize that your bully boss may view your successes as threats to his job. Therefore, he/she will cheat by raising the standards so high that it will be impossible for you (or anyone else) to reach.
Therefore, this will give them plenty of fodder to exercise their authority by chewing you and everyone else out for “failing to meet the company quota.”
Don’t even try to meet those impossible goals. You’ll only wear yourself out eventually. Besides, how many attempts to satisfy these bullies are you going to make before you become exhausted?
How long are you willing to shapeshift before you realize that conforming and adapting accordingly to their standards will never yield desired results?
You’ll only end up disappointed because, just as you can never fill a sieve, you can never appease a bully in the workplace, or anywhere for that matter.
So, stop wasting your time and energy. Realize that these people aren’t worth the powder to blow them up.
Again, the best you can do is look for other employment. Then, once you have another gig lined up, blow on out the door and bid these tyrants good riddance. No job is worth your mental or physical health.
5. gaslighting at work is also done by co-workers.
Even co-workers may gaslight you in hopes of securing that coveted promotion. In other words, they kick you and others down to move up in the company.
Other forms of gaslighting by co-workers is when they take credit for your work. And when you speak out against it, they make it look as if you’re trying to take credit for theirs. In essence, they reverse the roles of victim and offender.
Consequently, this tactic is so easy it shouldn’t work. But, it does.
Other forms of gaslighting at work by co-workers include them making up negative stories about you.
Also, they will deliberately sow discord between you and other co-workers. In other words, they will cause unnecessary conflict between you and your colleagues to make you look as if you’re a troublemaker who just isn’t a team player.
Lastly, bullying co-workers will also intimidate your colleagues and threaten them with retaliation if they continue to associate with you.
In conclusion, you must remember this very important tidbit here:
Most cases of workplace bullying, mobbing, and gaslighting by co-workers have somebody high-up behind the scenes, directing the entire movie. Put another way, your co-workers are likely gaslighting and bullying you at the behest of a bully supervisor or manager.
And they do this because the person in power has given them incentives to do so. They’ve offered them promotions or maybe even huge bonuses to bully you out of your job.
Therefore, it’s imperative that you begin an exit plan the moment you find yourself in these kinds of situations. The sooner you quit and move on to greener pastures, the better off you’ll be.
This post was all about gaslighting at work to help you decide when it’s time to prepare your exodus, cut your losses and move on to a better job and work environment.
Related posts you’ll enjoy:
1. How to Respond to DARVO: 7 Powerful Ways to Shut it Down
2. Signs of Gaslighting: The 7 Signs You Must Know
3. Setting Boundaries: 3 Powerful Practices to Hold Your Ground