I loved this post by Billy Mac. And I think you’ll find it very insightful and uplifting!
We live in a vain, narcissistic and selfie-obsessed world. We have all had to step around people blocking sidewalks and paths taking pictures of themselves. We all have that FB friend who posts pictures of every meal and of every stop they make. I know a woman who has no less than thousands of selfies […]
via The man in the mirror — Superman can’t find a phone booth
A beautiful and true post from “Lighthouse Survivors”!
We have to stop running from our mistakes, from our decisions that didn’t pan out, running from our pasts, and running from our failures in life. In order for someone to truly love us we have to show the true us, the part’s we hide from others. The pureness of it all is that despite […]
via What Truly Shapes Us — 🐠Lighthouse Survivors 🐠
You’re awesome just the way you are!
I have a wish for you this year, as we begin a shiny new decade. May you embrace whatever is true for you. May you embrace your “too.” “Too” as in when friends or family tell you that you are “too fill-in-the blank.” Too smart. Too sassy. Too independent. Too sensitive. Too brash. Too bookish. […]
via You’re (not) too much — candidkay
Jealous Girls taking behind her back
Like is subjective.
Not everyone is going to like you. Some may even hate you. But remember this! It’s their problem, not yours.
No matter how good, talented, famous, great or small you are or who you are, it’s estimated that 10-35% of the people you know will not like you.
But always stay true to yourself, your beliefs, and your convictions. Use your God-given talents to the best of your ability. Be the best you can be and you will be happy.
Realize that everyone- EVERYONE, has someone who doesn’t like them. And if you don’t have enemies, then you’re doing something wrong.
If those who are exceptional, like celebrities, politicians, and athletes have people who dislike them or hate them, it should be proof that there’s nothing wrong with you.
So, feel good about yourself. Embrace everything about yourself. Appreciate the people who love you. Let love in and let yourself shine!
Brent’s post about cyberbullying is heartbreaking and very informative!
Many students have been affected by bullying, maybe even ourselves when we were in school as well. Bullying has been an issue for decades, and it makes you wonder why we can’t find a solution or ways to curb this behavior. Personally, I never really realized that I was bullied when I was in school […]
via Cyberbullying…it is always personal — Growth. Leadership. Learning.
Bullying changes you, sometimes several times over. Here’s a heart touching post from the “Falling in Love with Jesus” blog.
Since I could remember through the time I graduated high school I was bullied. It affected me so much that I didn’t want to go to school; I didn’t want to think about school; I didn’t want to live. In high school people started rumors about me. They were sexual rumors that no one would […]
via How bullying changed me — Falling in love with Jesus
This is not one of those post where I attack anyone , I just wanna share some of my thoughts about how so many out there still can be so mean…. Almost every week I’m a guest blogger on a snap channel and to be there takes a lot of me. Don’t get me wrong, […]
via Kids bullying because we are!! — LiveNotExist
bully word in a dictionary. bully concept.
Because people use the term “bullying” so widely today, they too often misuse and abuse it. In today’s climate, people throw the word around flippantly, and “bullying” is used in situations that don’t fit its use.
Many are too quick to stick the “bully” label on anyone who says anything they either disagree with or don’t like. There’s so much confusion about what is bullying and what is only rudeness, being a jerk, or voicing an individual opinion, whether good or bad.
Therefore, I feel an obligation to point out the definition of bullying and to clarify what truly is and isn’t bullying.
Here is the definition:
Bullying – an ongoing and deliberate misuse of power in relationships through repeated verbal, physical, and/or social behavior that intends to cause physical, social, and/or psychological harm. It can involve an individual or a group misusing their power, or perceived power, over one or more persons who feel unable to stop it from happening (https://www.ncab.org.au/bullying-advice/bullying-for-parents/definition-of-bullying/ )
All too often, bullying is confused with:
1. Disagreements and truthful debates
2. Misunderstandings
3. Stubbornness
4. Incivility and jerky behavior
Bullying has become a blanket term to describe anyone who is only rude or opinionated. The label of “bully” is too quickly stuck to people who are not necessarily bullies but only uncivil jerks and jackasses- basically anyone who says, does or believes anything that the labeler doesn’t find comfortable. This is wrong.
For something to be considered bullying, there must be all of these ingredients:
1. An imbalance of power
2. Repetition
3. Repeated attacks against the same person over a long time.
4. The behavior has to be a habit or the same pattern, against the same victim.
If a 6’5” tall and muscular knucklehead on the street bumps into you and says, “Hey, idiot! Watch where the hell you’re going!”, then keeps walking. That’s not bullying. Is the person a total jackhole? Absolutely. But he isn’t necessarily a bully.
Now, if he deliberately ran into you and shot his mouth off to you every day, every time he saw you on the street. And he made a habit of it by continuing to harass you, then yes! He would be a bully. Because he would be using his size and height to intimidate you and he’d be repeating the behavior every day.
Here’s another example:
A person is voicing an opinion. When someone asks them if what they think of their new next-door neighbor, the person answers by saying,
“I think he is an arrogant, egotistical jackass.”
This is NOT bullying. It’s only voicing an opinion.
But! If the person continued this behavior for a length of time and smeared the new neighbor to everyone in the neighborhood in an attempt to turn everyone against her, then yes! It is bullying.
If two people are arguing over different beliefs, it’s not bullying Even if the argument is heated.
Only when one of the arguers resort to repeatedly (notice I said, repeatedly) calling their opponent names and shaming them because they don’t agree nor share their beliefs, and the harassment goes on for a long time, against the same opponent! That, my friends, is bullying!
To prevent innocent people from being labeled as bullies, we MUST get clear on exactly what it is that constitutes bullying! Only then will we be able to apply it to those who are truly deserving of the label.
The scourge of cyberbullying from a teenaged boy’s perspective.
The most common places for cyberbullying are:-Social media such as Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat and Twitter-SMS -Instant messaging (via the device, email provider services, apps and social media messaging features) Tips to overcome For kids and teensWe know it’s not your fault. What people call “bullying” is sometimes an argument between two people. However, if someone […]
via Cyberbully -the invisible killer — Rui Xiang’s blog
Beauty is subjective and in the eye of the beholder! A beautiful post from Manjul at “Innumerable Thoughts”.
Hello everyone!!!! Straight away coming to the topic before that – Give yourself a tight hug Because you are beautiful and you know that Because you are talented and you know that Just self realise is a matter which you don’t know and you are trying to neglect it Lets see the conversation of two […]
via Learn to embrace your own skin — Innumerable Thoughts
From “The Wierd Chick’s Blog” is a post about the remorse one lady feels years after she witnessed a bullied girl get pummeled in the bathroom years ago in school and failed to stop it.
This post will pull at your heartstrings.
By Paula Bianchi – Manipulation has been used as a tool to get what we want for eons. It’s something that we learn while we’re babies, then, we hone and expand our skills throughout our lives. Some of us become masters in manipulation. Every personality type, uses manipulation differently. Some may use it for the […]
via Mind Games: Manipulation — This Weird Chick’s Blog
A beautiful article about forgiveness from “Fuel For My Soul” blog.
Original Link : https://byrslf.co/why-we-must-forgive-853be66b12a When I was in high school, I found out a close friend of mine was talking negatively about me behind my back. It hurt so much because we were both leaders of an extracurricular organization, and I put so much trust in him. When I confronted him about it, he feigned […]
via Why We Must Forgive — Fuel for my soul
A beautiful post about forgiveness by the “Inner Miracles” blog.
What does Forgiveness mean to you? Well for me I think forgiveness is understanding the other persons perspective and having some empathy for what they are going through and understanding that they may not have realised what an impact they were having you on. But I have never been the sort of person who subscribes […]
via Opportunity To Forgive — Inner Energies
This post from “Amie Anne” nearly brought me to tears. Here’s a story of a lady who was bullied as a young girl and how she overcome later. I love reading about people who’ve been through the worst of circumstances and then won in the end!
Many targets of bullying do overcome and became loved and cared for people later! Please don’t give up!
I was teased by almost everyone I knew in real life. I was teased by people I should have expected to be loved and accepted by. I was twitted for my clothes, my speech, my height, my interests. I was told I was a loser, I even had a large, huge L painted on my […]
via If You Listen to Lies — Amie Anne
Bullies keep so many secrets. They have to, to maintain the facade they hide behind. Bullies must continue to wear a veil of perfection, toughness, and coolness, and they take extreme pains to keep that veil from falling off.
But if you watch and listen, your bullies secrets will eventually seep through by either dumb mistakes they make, or through the gossip of others.
1. One or both of their parents were drug dealers. A few classmates came from homes that people bought drugs out of. Because of this, these bullies were either ashamed of what they were living in or felt ignored.
2. They were on welfare. Many of my bullies came from families that had a tradition of living on welfare and in many cases, it went back a few generations. These bullies were deliberately having babies because they wanted to draw a welfare check. Others were ashamed of it and took extreme measures to hide it from the rest of the student body.
3. Their parents fought all the time. Other classmates dealt with such drama at home. Therefore, they would start altercations at school too. You are what you live.
4. They were being abused/neglected by parents. Several classmates were getting their butts kicked at home. So, they’d come to school to bully and physically attack me and a few others to overcompensate and feel some sense of power. If they had no control over their own lives, they would come to school and assert control over someone else’s.
5. Their mothers had a different man over every night. So many of the female bullies would come to school and call other girls whores, sluts, and skanks. But these were names they really wanted to call their own mothers because the men in their mothers’ lives usually came before the needs of their daughters.
6. They had a parent who was an alcoholic/drug addict. Many of my classmates were angry and bitter because they had parents who stayed drunk and loaded. The drugs and booze would usually come before the child and would force the family into poverty. Some of the parents were “mean drunks” and lashed out at their children.
7. They had a parent who was supposedly a criminal. One of my female bullies had a parent who was rumored to be a murderer. Although the suspected parent was a big wheel in the town and was never convicted, there was plenty of talk about it around town and everyone knew about it.
8. They were dirt poor. Many of my bullies lived in trailer parks, shacks, and the projects. Some didn’t have indoor plumbing and used outhouses for a bathroom- even in the winter. Because they were ashamed, they’d come to school and shame others to feel better about themselves.
9. A parent had abandoned them. Again, may of my bullies were full of anger and bitterness. When they got to school, they’d take it out on their vulnerable targets. It gave them a sense of power. Many of these bullies were also jealous of targets who had more than they did and would bully them as punishment for being from families who were financially better off.
10. They were victims of sexual abuse by a family member or their mother’s boyfriends. These girls felt utterly powerless. So, to not feel so helpless, they’d jockey for power at school by asserting dominance over their targets.
11. They’d had multiple abortions. Many of my female classmates, especially those who were popular, slept around and many become pregnant- two or three times during school. Their parents were public figures with images to protect. Therefore, these parents would finance their daughter’s abortions to hide the shame they feared would befall their perfect little families. One girl had an abortion in the sixth grade.
12. They’d go slumming. Many of the bullies in the preppy crowd would go to the projects and slept with some of the women who lived there. When the parents of two of them found out about it, they sent them to a group home for the rest of the school year (ninth or tenth grade).
13. One of the teachers who bullied me was sleeping around – even having sordid affairs with some of the boys on the varsity football team. And it was common knowledge around town.
But because this teacher had connections in town and her father was a businessman, she kept her job and everything was hush-hush around certain people who were allies of hers.
However, when people were at a safe distance and out of earshot of anyone who might have gone back and informed her of who the talkers were, they would trumpet the juicy info loud and proud.
This is in no way intended to pass judgement on anyone. We all have our hangups. The point is, bullies have dirty little secrets that they don’t want to get out. Always! Why do you think they target others with their vitriol? It’s all designed to keep the negative spotlight off them and place it onto the target.
It’s a way to keep their own skeletons from seeing the light of day. Because if everyone is too busy looking at and judging the victim, they won’t pay any attention to the bullies’ sins, snafus, and faux pas.