Here’s something I’m sure almost no one has thought of…that Bullying often has somewhat of a trickle-down effect on victims. What I mean by trickle-down effect is this:
The target has a bully or bullies who harass her to get a reaction. They trash-talk her, name-call her, basically run her down to her face and to others. The victim simply ignores the bullies. However, when the name calling and trash talking fails to give the bullies the desired reaction, they turn it up a notch by shoving. When shoving produces no desired results, the bullies soon get physical and began to kick, punch, or knock the victim down, or pull her hair and either make her cry or prompt the target to snap and fight back.
The bullies then use the crying, snapping or fighting back as proof that the target is weak, crazy, evil…take your pick. Next, the bullies embellish the story of the victim’s weakness, craziness or evilness by adding to the story to make it sound more believable and interesting. They make the victim sound even worse until they have finally succeeded in ruining the target’s reputation.
I’ll say again…Bullies harass a victim to the breaking point. They next use the victims breakdown as evidence that they are weak, evil or mentally unbalanced (Note that “mentally unbalanced” is the favorite claim of most bullies).
They go on to tell members of their families and everyone they come in contact with what a pathetic and despicable person the victim is, offering up the victim’s perfectly normal reaction as evidence. Some bullies will even go so far as to tell strangers on the street.
As word spreads, total strangers, people the victim doesn’t know (and whom don’t even know the victim) began to judge her…before having the chance to even meet her!
This is a very dangerous situation for the victim because she now has enemies, whom she doesn’t even know exist! How can she protect herself when she doesn’t even know who’s gunning for her? I know about this because it happened to me when I was young. You feel as if you’re walking blind and any moment, someone could attack and severely harm you and you wouldn’t even see it coming! You stay home, afraid to go to school, afraid to drive a car through town, afraid to walk your dog through the neighborhood,afraid to go out with your friends, afraid to go for a walk in the park or to the local swimming pool, afraid to go to the grocery store for your grandmother…afraid to be seen alone in town because you know that at any moment, you could be injured or even killed! I can tell you that it’s a very frightening situation to be in and one I wouldn’t wish on anyone!
Point! Victims have more to worry about then anyone realizes. If someone is being mistreated, instead of judging them and justifying it, ask questions. Watch and see if the person in question isn’t really a victim instead of the antagonist!