Tag: dictators

4 Easy Ways to Avoid Being Gaslighted

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Gaslighting is the worst form of abuse. It is the worst form of manipulation and psycho/emotional control and it happens when bullies and abusers consistently feed their targets lies that cause them (the target) to doubt their own experiences and what they know to be true. In other words, it undermines your perception of reality. Consequently, if bullies gaslight you often enough and for long enough, it can make you think that you must be going crazy.

Nowadays, narcissists, abusers, users, and psychopaths (BKA, bullies) are everywhere, and they will gaslight you. That is, if you don’t know how to avoid it. Sadly, many targets don’t have this knowledge and, therefore, end up brainwashed once the gaslighting has gone on for so long.

One this happens, targets will then become victims. Gaslighters and brainwashers can be anyone- bullies in school or at work, abusive parents and spouses, satanic cult leaders, and crooked politicians and dictators. Although these categories of people are different kinds of bullies from different walks of life, know this! They all pull the same tactics and play the same game.

Moreover, they all have the same goal- power!

Therefore, it’s imperative that you learn how to avoid it to overcome it and protect yourself from any future gaslighting.

Here are three easy ways to avoid this evil tactic:

  1. First and Foremost, Know yourself!

This is the most important thing to do. It means knowing who you are, what you want out of life, and what you absolutely will not accept. You must yourself inside and out and be secure with who you are. Once you know yourself completely, you’ll have the courage to set firm boundaries. Additionally, you’ll feel even better about yourself for doing it.

  1. Recognize gaslighting tactics when bullies use them!

So, what are the tactics used in gaslighting?

  • Doing something abusive and then denying it when you call it out.
  • Attacking your self-esteem when you defend yourself against abuse, such as name-calling, minimizing the abuse, and ridicule.
  • Projection- when the bully projects all their shortcomings onto you.
  • Distraction- when the bully calls attention to your flaws to keep people from noticing theirs.
  • Victim-blaming- blaming you for their abuse of you. Saying things like, “You made me do it,” “You had it coming,” “You deserve it.”

bye, talk to the hand

  1. Distance yourself from the bully (if possible)

This means having as little to do with the bullies as possible. Avoid the places they may gather. Put your hand up and walk away from them if they approach you. Do everything you can to put distance between you and them. If they start running their mouths, don’t respond unless you see an opportunity for a good burn that will embarrass the bejeebers out of them.

  1. See the bullies for the pathetic chumps they are.

When you realize that bullies are really a bunch of cowardly blowhards and on a lower lever than you, their words will no longer carry any weight and their gaslighting is least likely to affect you.

I can’t stress this enough! Confidence is the number one deterrent of bullies and bullying. The more confidence you have, the less likely you are to fall victim to gaslighting. You may be a target of bullies and their gaslighting, but you will never be a victim. Therefore, after so long of gaslighting you and not getting the reaction they want, the bullies will more than likely get bored and move on to someone else.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Reasons Bullies Need Targets to Depend on Their Approval

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Sadly, bullies successfully convince targets that they must depend on them for something. It’s true.

“Depend on bullies? For what?” You may ask.

For acceptance and approval. For the ability to make friends and establish relationships. Yes, many targets of bullying have been hoodwinked into thinking that they should depend on bullies to have these things. This is how bullies keep targets essentially begging for it- by dangling carrots of the possibilities of having them. And the reasons why bullies do this is to keep their targets under their control and to force them to do what they want them to do.

Think about it. Domestic abusers, who are also bullies, do basically the same to their partners- keep them dependent in order to keep control of them. Only domestic abusers keep their partners dependent mostly on financial resources by keeping a tight grip on any money that come into the household.

Domestic abusers also close their partners off from any job opportunities and cutting them off from their friends and family who may see through them and convince their partner to leave.

Abuse is abuse, whether it comes in the form of bullying or domestic violence and psychological manipulation.

Oh! But wait!

Socialist and Communist governments (again, also bullies) always do this to their peoples- make and keep them dependent on them to keep control of them, their behavior, and their thoughts. These tyrannical governments keep their citizenry dependent by controlling all the resources- food, the water supply, energy distribution, income and wealth distribution.

Because, if you can keep someone dependent, you can make the rules and tell them what they can and cannot do. Even worse, you can force them to put up with horrible conditions and treatment- things that they wouldn’t, under normal circumstances, tolerate. You can control every aspect of a person’s life if you can make them depend on you for their very survival!

When bullies do this, they keep you afraid to be your own person, to exercise your autonomy, speak freely, be creative, and to flourish. They keep you fearful of standing up to them, calling them out of their atrocious behavior and abuse, and of asserting your God-given right not to be controlled and abused.

Understand that bullies, domestic abusers, and oppressive governments/regimes have the same in common- to control everyone and destroy their targets. It’s how they keep everyone dependent and obligated, and, therefore preserve dominance and power over.

Realize that in the minds of bullies, other people are only there for their convenience, their purpose, and their agenda. Nothing more!

With knowledge comes power!

4 Jobs School Bullies Take Once They’re Out of School

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Bullies thrive on power, dominance, and fear. They love positions of power and will often opt for jobs that give them either authority over people or prestige.

Here are some of the jobs bullies select.

1.Politician. Remember that well-seasoned bullies are the biggest and most convincing schmoozers, liars, and convincers on the face of the Earth. They have a way of steamrolling their ways to the top. And why not? They’ve been politicking since they were in diapers and often have connections in high places who give them boosts up the ladder. Should it be any wonder we have politicians who schmoozed constituents to get into office, then do nothing once they get there? This is not to say that all politicians are bullies, but all bullies seem to be politicians.

 2. Law Enforcement Officer. First, let me start by saying that most police officers are great people who have my utmost respect, especially in today’s climate. They do a difficult and thankless  job. They put their lives on the line every day to keep us all safe and to prevent criminals from harming law-abiding citizens and their families.

However, like any profession, law enforcement also has its bad apples. And when people who were bullies in school take these jobs, they often become those bad apples in their departments- the very people who put shame on the badge. These bullies will abuse their power at will.

And it isn’t fair to the good cops who sincerely want to make a positive difference and make our streets safer. The good cops are the ones who suffer when this happens.

3. Correctional Officer. Even correctional officers have authority over inmates- just not all inmates because there are some inmates who flat out run penitentiaries. It happens. Bullies pick this job because in prisons, they get free rain to do to “select” inmates, usually, the inmates at the bottom of the social order, whatever they want, and what are those inmates going to do about it? It’s their word against the bully CO’s and whose word do you think the warden will take?

Even worse, bully CO’s also abuse the good and decent CO’s who are competent and perform their jobs well. My last husband worked as a Corporal in a penal institution before he died. And he told me a few horror stories. I also, have friends who work in the TDOC system and they too tell me that it isn’t the inmates they must watch out for, it’s their coworkers.

 4. Supervisors and Managers. Again, bullies love positions of power and once they take those positions, they usually have carte blanche to abuse who they select to bully. I can’t count the stories I hear of workplace bullying and of bully bosses who get drunk on power and destroy others’ careers and lives.

It seems that bullies can’t live without having power over another.

With knowledge comes empowerment

Bullies, Abusers, and Oppressive Governments – Why They Want You Dependent

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Deep down, many targets are brainwashed into thinking that they must depend on their bullies for something. It’s true. I know this leaves you scratching your head. You may ask,

“Depend on bullies? For what?”

Here’s your answer:

For approval, acceptance, and to have the ability to make friends.

Bullies

Yes. Bullies want targets to believe they must depend on them to have those things. And it’s how they keep targets essentially begging for it- by dangling carrots of the possibility of winning approval to keep targets under their oppressive thumb and doing what bullies want them to do.

Domestic/Spousal Abusers

Think about it. Domestic abusers do basically the same to their abused partners- keep them dependent to maintain control and domination of them. Only domestic abusers keep their victims dependent on financial resources by controlling the purse strings and shutting down opportunities for the partner to make their own money.

Another control tactic of the spousal abuser is cutting the partner off from their family and friends- people outside the relationship who may help the partner, see the abuser for what they are, advise the abused partner to leave the relationship, and, therefore, threaten the abuser’s power.

Abuse is abuse whether it comes in the form of bullying in school or the workplace, or domestic abuse and psychological manipulation in the home.

Oh! But wait!

Oppressive Governments

Socialist and Communist governments also do the same to their people. They manipulate events and media narratives, and even deliberately crash their countries’ economies to force their people to become dependent on them. They even set up terrorist regimes to beat any dissenters into submission and burn their homes and businesses. And this is nothing new. These tactics have been done down through history!

Though all this, these governments are able to wrest control of their people’s behavior, thoughts, and very lives.

Why? Because, if you can keep someone dependent on you, you can make rules for them to follow, tell them what to do, and have complete domination over their lives. You can force them to put up with the most unspeakable and evil of abuses and ensure their silence by keeping them in fear of withdrawing whatever it is they depend on you for- whether it be approval, acceptance, friendship, love, money, a good living, or even food and medicine to keep you alive.

You can have complete control over every aspect of a person’s life if you can keep them dependent on you for their very safety and survival.

Understand that when control freaks use these methods of control, they strip you of your freedom and autonomy. They keep you too afraid to be your own person, to exercise your human rights. They take away your ability to speak freely, to be creative with your life, and to flourish. They also keep you too afraid to stand up to them, call them out on their abuse, and asserting your God-given right not to be controlled and abused.

The controlling person does this by keeping you under the threat that they will retaliate and unleash even worse pain on you if you don’t obey or you step out of line.

The problem with this is that bullies, abusers, and oppressive governments only get drunk on their own power and are never satisfied. They must always up the ante and take more, more, and more control. Also, abusers tend to be sadistic monsters who live to see others go through pain and suffering, and no amount of suffering is enough for them. They have an insatiable blood-lust, and need to witness the pain of others, especially their targets.

You must realize that bullies, domestic abusers and oppressive governments and regimes have all the same in common- they love to control people and destroy their targets. And how they do it is to make them feel obligated and keep them dependent on them for social, financial, economic, or physical survival!

In their minds, you’re only here for their convenience, their purpose, their agenda, and their pleasure. Never your own.

In summary, always remember that bullies always rely on fear and dependency in others! Always- whether they bully in school, the workplace, the home, or government and politics. And the tactics, although done on different levels, are both universal and timeless.

We may not know it or may have been convinced otherwise, but we have more power over our lives than we know. It’s up to us whether bullies take away that power.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Jobs School Bullies Usually Take Once They’re Out of School

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Bullies thrive on power, dominance, and fear. They love positions of power and will often opt for jobs that give them either authority over people or prestige.

Here are some of the jobs bullies select.

1.Politicians. Remember that well-seasoned bullies are the biggest and most convincing schmoozers, liars, and convincers on the face of the Earth. They have a way of steamrolling their ways to the top. And why not? They’ve been politicking since they were in diapers and often have connections in high places who give them boosts up the ladder. Should it be any wonder we have politicians who schmoozed constituents to get into office, then do nothing once they get there? This is not to say that all politicians are bullies, but all bullies seem to be politicians.

 2. Law Enforcement Officer. First, let me start by saying that most police officers are great people who have my utmost respect, especially in today’s climate. They do a difficult and thankless  job. They put their lives on the line every day to keep us all safe and to prevent criminals from harming law-abiding citizens and their families.

However, like any profession, law enforcement also has its bad apples. And when people who were bullies in school take these jobs, they often become those bad apples in their departments- the very people who put shame on the badge. These bullies will abuse their power at will.

And it isn’t fair to the good cops who sincerely want to make a positive difference and make our streets safer. The good cops are the ones who suffer when this happens.

3. Correctional Officer. Even correctional officers have authority over inmates- just not all inmates because there are some inmates who flat out run penitentiaries. It happens. Bullies pick this job because in prisons, they get free rain to do to “select” inmates, usually, the inmates at the bottom of the social order, whatever they want, and what are those inmates going to do about it? It’s their word against the bully CO’s and whose word do you think the warden will take?

Even worse, bully CO’s also abuse the good and decent CO’s who are competent and perform their jobs well. My last husband worked as a Corporal in a penal institution before he died. And he told me a few horror stories. I also, have friends who work in the TDOC system and they too tell me that it isn’t the inmates they must watch out for, it’s their coworkers.

 4. Supervisors and Managers. Again, bullies love positions of power and once they take those positions, they usually have carte blanche to abuse who they select to bully. I can’t count the stories I hear of workplace bullying and of bully bosses who get drunk on power and destroy others’ careers and lives.

It seems that bullies can’t live without having power over another.

With knowledge comes empowerment