Will I Attend My 30th High School Reunion?

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If you’ve read my blog for long enough, I’m sure you can already guess the answer to that question. “Why not?” you may ask?

There are several reasons:

  1. I’d be a fool if I ever trusted them again. And I’d be a damn fool to put myself into a situation where I’d either get sucked into any petty drama or worse- hurt! And if they expect any trust from me, it’s too late. They should’ve have earned it by acting better.


  1. Most of my classmates haven’t changed a bit since high school. Many are still the same drama-filled buffoons they were in high school. Only they’ve gotten older and less attractive over the years. They’ve gone from being obnoxious and self-absorbed punks to being angry and bitter mid-lifers who are resentful and crotchety because their lives didn’t turn out like they had thought. And they wouldn’t think twice about causing harm if it meant they could relive the glory days of high school.


  1. Also, at high school reunions, people tend to regress into kids again. This little gathering would only be an opportunity for most of the classmates to compare themselves and their lives with one another.
Text sign showing Learn To Say No. Conceptual photo decline or refuse few things before you destroy yourself Woman wear formal work suit presenting presentation using smart device.

Text sign showing Learn To Say No. Business photo text decline or refuse few things before you destroy yourself Woman wear formal work suit presenting presentation using smart device

  1. Most of them will probably be drinking excessively, which, at our age, equals unattractive, obnoxious, and stupid. And it also means a higher intolerance of liquor than the good old days and being hungover and puking the next day. No, thank you! ‘Not my scene!


  1. The reunion would, more than likely, be nothing more than a circus of posturing, showboating, and one upmanship, where all the women would only talk about who’s gotten fat, who’s got the most wrinkles, and who’s had facelifts, tummy tucks, and boob-jobs. The men would probably only brag about who’s made the most money, who has the most sex, and who can still achieve an erection. And I have no time to listen to a bunch of drunken, and middle-aged adults compare bank accounts, waist measurements, or penis sizes.


  1. I forgive my classmates, yes. But it doesn’t mean I desire to play footsie with any of them. Again, many of them will probably be getting sloppy drunk and puking their guts out around a huge bonfire, and they will probably talk about the same boring crap over and over again. And I’ve got better things to do.


So, with that said, anytime you don’t feel safe going to a particular function, trust your instincts and don’t go!

If anyone tries to talk you into going to a gathering of any kind and you know specific people are going to be there- particularly people who’ve brought you drama and those you wouldn’t trust to shovel manure, there’s nothing wrong with rejecting the invite.


Self-care is of the utmost importance. And if going to any function means that you must be around people who’ve given you no reason to trust them, then you have not only a right, but an obligation to yourself not to go!

And if they get offended or angry with you for declining, all the more reason you shouldn’t go! Remember that your safety and peace of mind comes first!


0 thoughts on “Will I Attend My 30th High School Reunion?

  1. bigskybuckeye says:

    A week ago, my wife Andi were talking about class reunions. Both of us have fallen out of touch with former classmates. I haven’t attended since my ten-year, but I don’t think I’ve missed much.

    • cheriewhite says:

      I hear you there. I went to the 25th renunion but that was only because most of the classmates weren’t there (the troublemakers were gone thank goodness). Only a few were there. There was about 2 or 3 who gave me dirty looks but nothing dramatic. And I only overlooked the two rotten ones and continued to have a good time. Our renunion will probably be postponed until 2021 due to COVID. But most of the class will be at this one I’m told. Even the bullies, so I decided to snub this one.

  2. murisopsis says:

    I’ve kept in touch with the few people from HS that I liked. I went to the 5 and 10 yr reunions and they were boring. The people I had hoped to see weren’t there and the one who were in attendance were never my best buds. I did get to see a couple of people and catch up with them but for the most part is was not worth the effort. I’m glad you can say no to the invite and you are absolutely right about people regressing when they get together…

    • cheriewhite says:

      If you can stay in touch with a few old classmates, that’s a wonderful thing. And it’s truly sad when one has no desire to see their old classmates. But it is what it is and I have no regrets about it whatsoever. I’m perfectly happy without any of them. And I only post a few of my blog posts in the class group just to tick them off. They’re of no loss to me.

  3. Herb says:

    I went to the 10 year one just to see what it was like but I didn’t go to any of the others (The last invite was in 2017 to my 40th) and I don’t feel I missed much. The very small handful of friends I did have told me about them and they were pretty much how you described. Who needs to re-hash all that old junk. I wish them well, but I don’t want or need anything from any of them.

  4. powerinthemind43 says:

    To me and this is no criticism to those who did have a good high school experience and want to attend their reunions so I hope I don’t offend but in this day and age I don’t find them necessary. The first reunion usually 10 years later may have some excitement, because people change a lot from 18 to 28. Physically people often that were akward in high school and college grow into their looks, many have started families, maybe young kids. A lot of it is more curiousity. And occasionally some wounds may be healed or you may restart an old friendship. But then you also see those who haven’t progressed that think they are still in high school. Every one after that you start seeing fewer people in general want to come and by the third or fourth one the interest has wanted a lot. Plus in a day and age of Social Media and texting you can easily keep up with most people if you are truly interesting in knowing how their lives are or vice versa.

  5. powerinthemind43 says:

    With what you went through and the fact you have gone on and became a successful writer, some will probably feel proud to see you succeed but there will be those who are eaten up with jealousy. I probably wouldn’t go either.

    • cheriewhite says:

      Right. And I’ve gotten a few nasty messages from a few old bullies from school about my published books and blog. And those are going to be the ones who will be at the 30th reunion (whenever it happens). So, nope! I’ll pass.

  6. gjef2871 says:

    Wow. This is such good advice, and it’s topical in my life right now.

    I find it so hard to reject people, because I hate being rejected. At the same time, I’ve come to the realization: I do not have to put up with that **** any more!

    I can set boundaries. I can choose the people I’m around. My time is not a free pass for bad behavior. I value my time. I value feeling good. I choose to be around people I admire and who help me improve.

    Go you for missing the reunion and setting boundaries. You go girl.

    Also: I like your blog 🙂

    • cheriewhite says:

      You don’t know how much this means! This made my heart fill with joy! Thank you so much for your lovely comment! I’m so proud of you for loving yourself and setting boundaries! 💖💐🌹🌺🌻🦋

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