Bullies don’t only want to hurt you or destroy your good name. More than anything, they want to get into your head and alter your mind.
The worst thing about bullying isn’t the physical assaults. Cuts and bruises heal easily. It isn’t even the name-calling, the smears, the rumors, or the marginalization. It’s what it can do to the mind if we aren’t careful.
The worst thing that can happen to a target of bullying is when he begins to believe what he’s being told. The worst thing that happens is when she begins to see herself through the eyes of the very people who hate her and who want nothing more from her than her complete destruction and ruination.
Anytime a target begins to believe he is nothing, he does himself a huge disservice because he discards his own definition of him and replaces it with that of his bullies. He values the bullies’ opinions over his own.
I cannot stress enough the importance of loving yourself even when it looks as if others don’t love you back. You must continue to believe in yourself even when it seems that no one else does. You must also continue to stand your ground even when people want to bury you in it.’
That’s how you keep your confidence and self-esteem from tanking. It’s how you keep even a little bit of your dignity and it’s how you protect your spirit from being broken.
Yes, your confidence may take many blows, but it doesn’t have to die. Your self-esteem may be pummeled, but you can keep it for hitting rock bottom. Bullies may break off pieces of your dignity, but you don’t have to give them the piece of it you still hold for yourself. Your spirit may take a hard beating, but only you decide whether to let them break it.
In short, you don’t have to surrender everything that matters to your bullies.’
You have more power than you know. Your thoughts are the freest commodity you have. No matter what they take from you, they can never take your mind if you don’t let them.
“Power is not what you have but what the enemy thinks you have.” ~ Saul D. Alinsky (Rules for Radicals)
Think about that quote for a moment and realize that it’s what all bullies live by.
I was in a friend group of 7 or 8. I was closer with 2 since I knew them longer. As we grew older, one of the two would hate one of us in the friend group every six months, or so. It passed back and forth. I never expected I would become her next target since I was close to her.
That happens more than we think and it’s hurtful. It really tells us who our friends really are.
That’s DEFINITELY true. But all I can do is send her love and light. Whatever I had to make her so afraid, I hope she over comes it on her path.
Anyway, thank you for posting your affirmations/quotes every morning. I get a boost of energy in the morning as soon as I read it.
You’re so welcome. And I’m so glad the posts help you and make your day better. Sending you all my best!
Great post. This was my downfall while I was bullied. I started to believe them. I loss my self-esteem. It took a long time to build it up.
Thank you, Aimee. I made the same mistake too, sweetie. Many of the posts I post are things I learned the hard way. I’m so glad you were able to restore your confidence and self-esteem! It makes such a huge difference.