You drag them out.
What do I mean by this?
When they attack you with insults, you simply say, “That’s your opinion,” or “Opinions vary.” When you do this, you will only force the bullies to repeat the attacks over and over again- drag them out until they become boring and redundant.
I won’t kid you; this technique won’t be an easy thing to do. Any time we are attacked, our first instinct is to jab back with attacks of our own. But sadly, this usually proves ineffective as it only pulls us down to the bully’s level.
Also, although this method can be effective in the workplace, it’s much harder and usually takes much longer to have an effect as adults are more tenacious and stealthier with their bullying. This strategy works much better in the school environment.
Respond, yes. But react, no.
And how you respond is with short comebacks like those above, then walk away and leave the bullies standing there, running their mouths and looking stupid. Because, when you don’t give them the response they want (which is for you to attack them back by name-calling, yelling, screaming, or cursing), their natural reactions will be to repeat, repeat, repeat like a broken record.
In other words, you force the bullies to repeat the same attacks until it gets so old and stale that others outside the bully/target dynamic get thoroughly sick of hearing the bullies that they no longer pay attention to it.
In deploying this neat little method, you expose the bullies’ fakery and the childishness of their attacks. You also expose the weakness of the bullies’ position, which they thought was their strength. Instead of turning their “audience” against you, they end up alienating them because bystanders become bored after a while.
With knowledge comes empowerment!
This is a good nonviolence technique I learned where I used to work. Don’t give someone acting out any fuel for their rage. Absorb their energy and be flexible and nonthreatening. Say completely noncommital things like….THAT’S FINE, OKAY, I’M LISTENING, I UNDERSTAND, I’LL THINK ABOUT THAT, THAT’S GOOD..etc.
Those may work.
Respond, yes. React, no. That is such an important lesson when dealing with bully – they, like trolls online, are all about reactions. They want to demean, debase, humiliate while showing a power over their victim.
Take the power away, by taking the reaction away. Just blank face them. Reactions and attention feed bullies and trolls. But many will get bored and stop if they don’t get the satisfaction of a reaction.
Exactly! 💯
Excellent tactic!
Thank you so much, Valerie! 💖 If only I’d known about it when I was young. 🙂
Absolutely nothing but the truth. Speaking to my heart directly and it consoles me. I had to save this so I can always take a glance on a steady. I love this
Thank you so much, Richard. 😊 I’m so glad this helps.
🥰