Bullies are good at giving unsolicited advice, even through they despise it when the shoe is on the other foot.
They give you free advice on how think, act, or feel under any circumstances. What bullies are best at is telling you how you should react to the very abuse they inflict. These morons have a lot of nerve, don’t they?
However, I want you to understand why bullies do this. Bullies give unsolicited advice because it serves them to do so. How does it serve them, you may ask? It does so by giving their audience the impression that they know more and are more qualified than you.
In other words, bullies don’t give advice to help you. They give it to help themselves– to look cute and like they’re smarter than you.
Therefore, if you don’t know why bullies do it nor how to counter it, it can chip away at your self-esteem. So, what are ways that you can counter a smartass bully who gives you advice you didn’t ask for?
You Don’t Need a Bully’s Cheap Two Cents.
You counter this by having a clear understanding that the amount of weight another person’s opinion carries with you depends on their relationship with you. Or, at least, it should.
Put another way, the people who are the closest to you and whom you feel closest to are those whose opinions you should value the most. These are the people who love and care for you the most- your parents, grandparents, your spouse- your dearest family and friends.
In contrast, the opinions of any bullies, fake friends, anyone who uses and abuses you, should carry the least weight. We should never value the opinions or judgements of bullies. Ever! Even if the bullies happen to be bosses, teachers, or any other superiors, you don’t have to give any worth to any opinions they have. Only with superiors, you may want to handle this differently. Perhaps the best thing is to keep quiet about it until you find a way out from under their thumbs.
Understand that all through life, many people will give their opinions. However, those opinions won’t serve you nor will they have any bearing on your life.
Never Give Value to Anything that Has None.
Opinions are like elbows and everyone has one. But the value of an opinion must always be determined by who they come from and the relationship you have with them.
Therefore, stop giving undue value to the opinions of those who aren’t worth your consideration. In that, you happily discard any unsolicited advice from anyone who hasn’t earned your respect. When you do, you keep your power and your dignity.
With knowledge comes empowerment!
🙏
Aum Shanti
Thank you so much, Shanti! 💖
I’ve experienced this firsthand. I learned to thank them and let them know I’d take it under consideration, for rejecting their advice only labeled me as argumentative and led to more people “correcting” me. We need to be judicious with our answers, but keep in mind that ultimately, we need to make our own choices, no matter how clearly others may see things in ways that does us no good!
Absolutely right! You can do it diplomatically. Telling them to MYOB usually does the trick when diplomatic answers don’t work.