Bullies aren’t just a pain in the butt; they’re power-hungry confidence thieves who can wreak havoc on your life if you aren’t careful. Understand that the laws of human nature dictate that no one does or says anything without some sort of psychological benefit.
Bullies reap several benefits at your expense if you’re a target. Here is a list of those benefits:
1. A sense of power – bullies bully for power, control, and domination. Anytime a bully takes a victim down, they get a tremendous rush of power and become addicted to that rush. This is why bullies never bully once. They always come back for more.
It’s no different from being a drug addict. The evil actions, cruelty, and power become a drug in and of themselves.
Also, as with any drug, the same tactics and frequency of bullying lose their potency after a while, so the bully must escalate the torment to keep getting the rush they crave.
For example, when name-calling and verbal abuse of the target lose the thrill they once gave and begin to get boring, bullies will often escalate to either cruel pranks, humiliation, or physical assault and battery to keep getting the rush they look for. It’s the same as when a drug addict builds a drug tolerance and begins taking higher doses.
2. Popularity – Bullies bully because people think it’s cool or cute. Bullying gives the bully lots of attention and visibility from others.
3. Superiority – Bullying gives the bully an appearance of strength and sends a message to those around him that he’s a badass, and they’d be a fool to mess with him. The bully also gives the appearance that he’s a top dog.
4. Attention and Sympathy – if the bully can make the targeted student look like the bad guy, he gets to enjoy the attention and bask in the sympathy others give him.
5. Distraction from their own shortcomings – Bullies are experts at making the target look weak and pathetic. If the bully can distract everyone else’s attention to the victim’s flaws, weaknesses, and shortcomings, he can keep the spotlight off his own defects and imperfections. Because if people expect to see trouble coming from a specific place, that’s where they’re going to look.
6. Projection of their own flaws onto someone else – Bullies have a flare for accusing their targets of the same deplorable behavior of which they are guilty. If the bully can make the target look like the bully, then the real bully can go unpunished and continue to attack the victim freely and with impunity. Again, it also takes the focus off his own misdeeds.
7. The satisfaction and gratification of seeing the target suffer – Bullies love to see their targets suffer. For the bully, the victim’s misery is entertainment and gives them a rush of power. Just know they can determine how the target feels and how their day goes gives them a feeling of dominance.
Don’t give them the satisfaction. Be a waste of time and energy to them.
True…bullies bully to hide their own insecurities.
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They are emotional vampires who have to feed off others to energise themselves.
Yes they are. And the best we can do to get rid of them is to go grey rock.
I learned to give the bully an unanticipated reaction to throw them off their game, as one tactic.
You said it. Be unpredictable and they won’t know what to do. 🙂
Yes, so true!! Bullies are the most insecure in the first place!!!
Absolutely they are! 💯
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All bullies really do have the same tactics!
Absolutely, Bella! And their tactics are universal and timeless.