People, especially males, are visual creatures. A part of human nature is that appearances do matter. We choose dates based on how the other person’s physical appearance.
Although how you look isn’t the entire package and things like personality and disposition are what counts in the long run, looks are what gets your foot in the door. It’s just the crazy, unfair world we live in.
It’s no secret that many females pride themselves on how they look. Hey, I do it too! Beauty is power. There’s also a phenomenon known as the “halo effect.”
The halo effect is “a cognitive bias that occurs when an initial positive judgment about a person colors the individual as a whole.”
Beauty often makes a person appealing, making it difficult to change the minds of others when they receive new and negative information about the person. It makes the person appear more trusting and friendly. People who possess a certain positive quality or strength are assumed to have positive qualities in all other areas as well.
A teacher might be so impressed with a student’s looks or charming personality that they may give that student an A when, in reality, they may deserve a C. Clothes, hairstyles, and makeup are presumed to be of more value than, say, a person’s good heart or generosity.
Bullies instinctively know this, which is why they not only bend over backward to keep up the best appearance, but they will either shame someone else, particularly girls and women if they don’t look as good as them, or tear them down if they look better than them.
Weight-shaming is all too common these days. Many people ridicule overweight females (and some males) because “they’re not thin enough.” Bullies may also taunt tiny women and men and tell them they “need to put some meat on their bones.”
Because the person is overweight or underweight, those around them take pleasure in making them feel as if they aren’t good enough and that they should not love and accept themselves.
This is wrong!
I want you to understand that weight doesn’t mean that you’re unattractive. I know many overweight and underweight people who are beautiful. They have impeccable hygiene, they dress nice, and they have fantastic personalities and positive outlooks on life. These people are happy, regardless! And they feel good about themselves!
Realize that bullies will often pick out what they perceive to be flaws in your physical appearance when they have nothing else to judge you on. They have a real flair for picking out something about yourself that you’re highly insecure about and using it simply because they know it triggers you.
But know that it takes a shallow and superficial person to resort to this kind of behavior.
No matter how you look, you still have value, and you matter! You are loved regardless!
However, here are a few ways you can feel better about yourself if your classmates or coworkers are body-shaming you.
1. Dress your best. Because if you look good, you feel good.
2. Apply a little makeup. Again, this will do wonders for your self-esteem.
3. Maybe get a new hairstyle. Something new will often make you feel better about yourself. It will give you that burst of excitement that you’ve probably needed for a while now.
4. Eat right and exercise. But only if you’re not happy with your present weight or physical endurance.
Do it because it’s better for your health. We should take steps to take care of our bodies so that we can ward off any illnesses in the future. Also, exercise is a great stress-buster!
You should always practice self-care!
And don’t do it thinking that the bullies will stop harassing you because chances are, they won’t. They’ll only find something else to disparage you about. It’s what bullies do best!
But do the above for YOU, because YOU want to do it and because you want to change things about yourself that YOU don’t like. Not because others say you should.
And if there’s something you cannot change, don’t beat yourself up. Find ways to embrace it. And if others don’t like the way you look, tell them to hit the road!
Change the things you can and accept the things you can’t change.
Understand that good looks isn’t what makes you as a person. A beautiful outer appearance counts for nothing if you’re ugly on the inside. And beauty is fleeting, but a good personality lasts a lifetime!
Look your best not to impress others, but to make yourself feel good.
And lastly, know that you’re beautiful and that you’re loved! You have a purpose for being here! Never forget that!
Someday when I’m going to be a parent I want my kid or kids to feel loved and beautiful in their own skin. Like you said Beauty Doesn’t Have A Weight Limit!
That’s the spirit right there! Teach those babies confidence. 💖💖💖
Bodyshaming is definitely a form of bullying. That being said I have no use for superficial people and Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder. What one person is attracted to, the other may not be.
You said that perfectly! 👍💯❤💖
Agree and disagree with you 🙂
I agree that the shape doesn’t really matter, because a person can be unattractive in any shape skinny or fat. As long as people can find the right style and take care of themselves from hair to toe, they will look good.
But I think nowadays people are very soft and everything “hurt their feelings”. What about turn bulling to good motivation? What about instead of getting depressed go to gum, start to run/walk, have a diet. Just do something ! No?
I assume lots of people will be mad at me 😀😀 I gained 5 kg during the pandemic and I’m on the keto diet now. Works pretty well – 2 kg for 10 days
Have a great day!
I agree with you wholeheartedly, Angela. Many people get offended so easily these days and it’s sad. I also agree that bullying should be a motivator and I will definitely wrote a post about that in the future. Thank you so much for your thoughts! 💖🤗💐
Thank You! 🙃🌞💗
Oops! I pushed the send too soon. I meant to say Congratulations on your weightloss. Keep up the awesome work! 🙂💖
Thank you! With age, I noticed, even harder to lose weight. But 2-3 more kg…… and I will be in my regular shape and can fit into clothes again 😀😀 I’m getting there😜😀
I wish you all the success in your weightloss, honey. And I feel your pain. I’m on the Keto diet as well and I’ve lost 20 lbs. But I need to lose another 30. I was a nice size when I got married almost five years ago. But the weight slowly crept on until I had to do something before it got bad. I agree it gets harder and harder to lose as you get older.
20 lb is a lots!!!!! Amazing!!!!!
I found Keto diet not too bad. I’m not starving at all, but craving for bread and chocolate 😀😀
I whish both of us good luck! We will win 😀👍 100%
20 lb is a lots!!!!! Amazing!!!!!
I found Keto diet not too bad. I’m not starving at all, but craving for bread and chocolate 😀😀
I whish both of us good luck! We will win 😀👍 100%
Thank you so much, Angela! And yes! The lack of starving is what I love about Keto. And we’ll definitely win at this battle! Absolutely we will! Hard work and determination pays off Bigly in the long run! 💪😊💖
Absolutely!
Sorry for double messages, my phone glitched
I understand, Angela. That happens a lot. 🙂
This is so good. I’ve been shamed for being dusky, while I was in school, and I really want a future where my kids won’t face this ever in there lives. All of us are beautiful and unique. ALL OF US! ❤️
That’s exactly right! I’m so sorry you were made to feel less than because of such a superficial reason. Thank you so much for your thoughts. ❤
Thanks to you too! ❤️
So much pain is caused by the American obsession with thin. We should strive to be healthy.
I couldn’t agree more. And it’s not just an American obsession. It’s a Global obsession.
A lot of pain is caused by the American obsession with thin. We should strive to be healthy and happy.
Absolutely. 🎯💯 And it’s not just an American obsession. It’s everywhere- England, France, Germany, the Middle East- it’s a global obsession.