You Should Never Let Bullies Tell You What to Do

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A crazy young man in a white shirt standing and screaming at a woman in a pink dress. Women don’t care and looking at the camera with a toothy smile—indoor studio shot, isolated on light brown background.

Targets should never give in to their bullies’ demands nor requests, no matter what. And they should never let their bullies talk them into anything. I know, I’m one to speak because many times, years ago, I caved in.

However, knowing what I know now, I’d take a beating before I’d give in to them because I realize that I’d more than likely have to take a beating anyway. Bullies are known for constantly changing their rules and demands to fit their needs and narratives.

Understand that bullies may give you empty promises and false incentives. They may sweet talk you, or they may threaten you with even more exclusion, more smears of your name, and more bullying.

But here’s the thing. Here’s something that targets don’t think about:

You can’t lose something you never had. Your bullies already hate you, and they already want to hurt you. So, it’s not like you can lose any ground with them because you never had it in the first place.

So think about it. Dig deep and think.

But You’re My Parents. You’re “Supposed” to Love Me

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You’re at the dinner table eating with your child. Lately, you’ve noticed that your son or daughter, who used to be happy, carefree and bubbly, has been going through some changes. Your once happy-go-lucky child is now withdrawn, sad and sullen. You ask questions only to be stonewalled in the beginning. Finally, your son/daughter confides in you. He/she is being bullied at school and feels worthless and stupid.

You sit down beside your child, place a loving arm around their shoulders and tell them that you love them and that they are awesome no matter what others at school may tell them. You explain that they have value and are worthy of being loved. You even point out their best qualities to them, only to find that your loving words provide little, if any consolation or assurance.

Your teen or tween looks at you as if you do not know what you’re talking about and says, “You only love me because you’re my mom/dad.” or “I’m your kid. You’re supposed to love me.”

This is exactly what young victims think and say when well-meaning parents or grandparents begin attempting to convince them that they are, in fact, good people.

All too often, the parent is the last to know when their child is being bullied and by the time the parent or legal guardian does find out, the harassment has gone on for so long that the child’s self-esteem has already worn thin. This is why parents should never stop reminding their children/teenagers of their worth.

If your child is a victim of bullies at school, keep showing them love and affection. Never stop praising them because they need it now more than ever! Although children, especially teenagers may respond rather coldly and it may not look as if the loving words and gestures are having any effect right away. Your child does hear you and it just might be the only thing which keeps him/her from trying to harm themselves.

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Know that for a few years, between the ages of about 10 to 18, life is about having friends, looking cool and being held in high regard by peers. Popularity is highly valued by those in this age group. Also, remember that bullying is a form of brainwashing. Bullies repetitiously remind victims that they are worthless and sadly, after enough time has gone by, the victim comes to believe it themselves.

Parents should be just as repetitious, if not more than the bullies when countering the messages that bullies bombard their children and teenagers with.

It may take time before the child begins to see their own goodness but rest assured that eventually, the positive words and actions toward the child will pay off and he/she will finally begin to realize that they really are awesome people. Therefore, the words of bullies will no longer be so devastating and chances are that the bullied victim will regain confidence. Better yet, they just might cease to be a victim because of that regained confidence!

Cancel Culture Is Just Another Form of Bullying

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Lately, there’s been a ton of cancel culture going on not only in this country, but around the globe. Cancel culture seeks to do many things- to instill fear in people, silence them, and oppress them. It looks to cover up wrongdoing, abuses of power, and atrocities. CC and bullying are no different.

When it happens in school or the workplace, we call it bullying. When it happens on a political or government level, we call it cancel culture. Understand that cancel culture and bullying are one and the same.

Cancel culture enforces a double-standard and holds targeted people to standards that no one outside the targeted group lives up to.

What is wrong for the targeted group is right for the in-group. What’s celebrated for one person or group is loathed in another. What’s deemed illegal for one person or group is legal, even heroism in another.

Sound familiar? It should.

This is bullying on a grand scale. Because one group has the right to commit crimes, hurt, and kill people. But the other group doesn’t even have the right to defend themselves or their families and homes against the same criminals who are given carte blanche to harm them.

Many people have lost their jobs, livelihoods, homes, even families to cancel culture. Understand that cancel culture is bullying and it isn’t right to refuse someone else’s right to speak, think, work, flourish, and exist simply because they have different opinions, beliefs, and perspectives than you.

If this isn’t mass bullying, I don’t know what is!

The message cancel culture send is, “We can, you can’t,” “Do as I say, not as I do,” “Rules for thee and not for me,” and dissenting opinions need not apply.”

So, what shapes our opinions, beliefs, and perspectives?

Several things:

  1. The family we’re born into
  2. The environment we grew up in
  3. Personal experiences
  4. Education
  5. Culture

Cancel culture isn’t just defamation and smear campaigns. No! It goes much further.

It includes doxing the target- digging up information about the target and their family and using it to cause harm to the target and his/her loved ones. Cancel culture seeks to take away the target’s good name and standing in society, their rights to earn a living and feed their family, and their physical safety. I don’t care what side of the aisle you’re on. Cancel culture is wrong! It’s evil and it has to stop!

I want you to understand that everyone has a divine, God-given right to their own opinions, to be neutral, or to stay silent. These are Human rights, and again, no matter what side of the aisle we’re on, we each have those rights!

Right before our very eyes, certain groups are being conditioned not to defend their most precious rights. They’re also being programmed not to believe what they see happening, nor to listen to their God-given gut instincts. And it’s scary!

Nowadays, it’s too easy to destroy someone’s life and take everything away from them- everything they’ve worked hard their whole lives for. The sad thing is that, if a bully wants to destroy you, they don’t need evidence to back them up. They don’t need proof to do it.

All it takes is an accusation, an allegation, or suggestion.

All it takes is a tweet, Facebook post, or any online post from ten-fifteen years ago.

All it takes is one harmless joke that’s deemed offensive, or a picture of you from the seventies or eighties in a Halloween Costume that is seen as politically incorrect today.

Bullies can dig up something from years ago, a high school photo, an old photo of you at a kegger or house party when you were a wet-behind-the-ears teenager and wipe you out! There’s no forgiveness or redemption on the internet!

Yes, people! This is the crazy world we’re living in now.

Cancel Culture doesn’t take into consideration that people grow up. It doesn’t care about the fact that people change as they get older or that we learn from our mistakes. Maturity doesn’t sway it. Cancel culture has no concern that we all do and say stupid things when we’re kids and that we’re all human beings capable of making errors.

Understand that if bullies cannot pin anything on you, they will either claim that you’re mentally imbalanced, or they will dig up something, anything from your past that puts you in a bad light.

I’ll say again. Cancel culture is bullying of the highest order. It’s also stalking and it’s dangerous. Cancel culture puts our very lives at risk and people have had to flee their own homes due to doxxing and having their lives and the lives of their family threatened. There are even a few that have gone into hiding. Some have even had to go underground.

It is my hope that people wake up and see the craziness and obsessiveness of cancel culture. Each and every one of us should take a stand against this madness.

Believe it or Not, Bullies Get Talked About Too

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If there’s one thing small towns are known for, it’s gossip. If you find yourself unfortunate enough to be a victim of bullies in a small town, gossip about your (perceived) transgressions has reached from city limits to city limits…at light speed.

However, take it from someone who has been there. Bullies get talked about too, only people never talk openly about them. Because the talkers fear becoming the bullies’ next targets, the talk is always in secret.

Believe me, you aren’t the only one being victimized. There are others. But because the others more than likely won’t admit to being bullied and because bullies will never tell you if there are others, you never hear about it and, therefore, mistakenly think that you are the only one they pick on.

If you are a victim of bullies, it would be in your best interest to find out who your bullies’ enemies are and align yourself with them. It’s what I did, and boy, did I find out some really juicy tidbits about their lives…most of which is rather embarrassing information!

I didn’t have to ask. I would only sit or stand quietly, observe, and listen! Bullies may think they’re stars, but scratch the surface, and you’ll discover that they don’t shine so brightly after all.

One of my bullies is now a nurse, and I am good friends with several nurses who’ve had the displeasure of working with her. In their words, “she is as incompetent as they come.”. Also, she has a big family secret, and if you’ve lived in the same town that she lives in long enough, you know what that secret is.

I’ll stop here to protect privacy. For years, this woman has bounced from one job to another, either getting fired or quitting when things didn’t go her way. She has also been through five, maybe six marriages.

Another bully dropped out of high school and ended up working as a waitress. She now owns her own restaurant but barely breaks even. Several others are incarcerated or have been, with one being convicted of murder and another convicted of armed robbery, running guns, and possession of illegal substances.

The bullies I battled in school are only ordinary people. Yet, even today, most of them continue trying like mad to keep up with the Jones’s, making everyone think they have beaten the rat race and failing miserably. Most have never left the small town and still put on the facade of power and a perfect life. It’s hilarious when you really think about it.

Here’s some advice:

1. Befriend your bullies’ enemies. Befriend the other outcasts in your school, workplace, or community. Because I guarantee you that you aren’t the only one they’ve steamrolled. Bullies leave a lot of shattered lives in their wake and make lots of enemies. And strength always comes in numbers.

2. Listen out! You will hear many stories about your bullies from other outcasts and other people who cannot stand them. You will be surprised at what you find out. It may be that your bullies get laughed at too. People are only careful who they do it around and are quieter about it. They must be, or the bullies will target them too.

Bullies aren’t as important or invincible as they put on. It’s only an act! People such as these must work hard to maintain the facades they put on, and the reason they give victims a difficult time is that victims don’t have to work that hard. They simply choose to be themselves.

How do I know this? Because I ingratiated myself into the good graces of the enemies of my bullies and would get an ear-full every time we got together.

Any information you get about your bullies is valuable to you. Always! Because it can then be used as leverage should the bullies come for you.

Make no mistake. Bullies have enemies…LOTS of them! However, they will never in a million years tell you about it. They don’t want you to believe that others disrespect them behind their backs because it would shatter the image of invincibility they’ve set for themselves.

Instead, they want you to believe that everyone loves them and thinks they are the best things since the wheel’s invention. And they want you to believe it because they want you to feel bad about yourself.

Put another way, if bullies can make you think that everyone loves them, then you’re more likely to believe the lie they drum into your head every day. That you’re just plain garbage. Because a bully’s popularity and greatness (perceived or not) only serves to re-enforce any dislike the target has for themselves after they’ve been bullied for so long.

Please don’t let this happen to you. Befriend your bullies’ enemies. Open your eyes not only to your great value and worth but also to the facades your bullies hide behind and the acts they put on. I guarantee that your self-esteem will skyrocket.

Faking a Surrender to Bullies to Trick Them into Leaving You Alone

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Is there ever a time when you should surrender to a bully? The answer is yes, or at least make it look like you’re surrendering to them. In life, there are times when we should pick and choose our battles- to decide whether to fight back or leave well enough alone. It is a must when your bullies are extremely powerful because it isn’t smart to fight them and give them a chance to defeat you.

Sometimes real power comes with swallowing your pride and giving in to them first. When you do this, you’ll only enrage the bullies and throw them off-kilter because they were looking for a fight and so sure they’d get one but didn’t.

There’s no point in fighting an unwinnable battle. Showing weakness can be a strength if you know how to use it correctly.

When you surrender (or make it look as if you do), you give yourself time to recuperate and time to torture and irritate your bullies subtly. You can sneakily sabotage your bullies in ways they’d never expect nor detect. Maybe you can get what you can out of the surrender, then fight later when your bullies are not so strong. Believe it or not, bullies do eventually lose power.

You don’t surrender because you give up. You do it to humor your bullies and lull them into a false sense of complacency- to fool them into thinking they’ve won. Understand that bullies are continually trying to show dominance and superiority, and if you make it look like you surrender to them, it’ll be so easy to trick them.

Being submissive to them (for the time being) makes them feel satisfied and powerful. In this, the bullies become easier targets for a later countermove or indirect ridicule.

For example, You surrender, and the bullies let you walk away. But as you turn and walk away, you can cut a silent fart in their general direction, and they won’t think it came from you. They’ll only be looking at each other and wondering who dealt it.

Silent ridicule works wonders for self-esteem!

Don’t Ask Why Because Bullies Will Never Tell You.

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Understand that keeping you guessing is half the power bullies have over you. They will never tell you why they bully you also because, in many cases, they don’t know themselves.

To keep you confused and bewildered is a power all its own. Because when you’re confused, you can’t think clearly. And if you can’t think clearly, the less likely you are to figure out what to do to escape the bullies and their abuse. Or worse- how to defend yourself, conquer your bullies, and win your power back.

Understand that bullies will never relinquish their power. Never! And to be truthful as to why they bully you would be like giving secrets to the enemy. To be honest and tell you what they hate about you would be like giving their power away to you, and they’ll be damned if they ever!

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I want you to know that there’s nothing wrong with you. You must know in your heart that you never did anything to deserve the brutal treatment your bullies continuously dish out to you. They are the crazy ones. They are the ones with the problem, and they are the ones who will have to answer for what they’re doing one day, either in this life or the next.

So instead of focusing your attention on trying to find out why your bullies are giving you problems, focus on self-care.

Instead of asking, “Why me?” ask, “What can I do to take care of myself?” or “What can I do to remove myself from the situation and the toxic environment?” Think about what options you have and weigh each of them carefully. Then quietly begin making plans to get out of there as soon and as safely as possible.

Why Targets of Bullying Have Trust Issues

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It’s not that targets don’t want to trust people because they do. They want so badly to be able to trust someone not to harm them or to turn on them.

Targets want so much to trust, to be able to relax and to be comfortable in social situations. Only they don’t know who to trust. Therefore, it’s much safer not to trust anyone- safer to put up walls and keep the rest of the world out.

Targets have, over time, built up invisible fortresses around themselves for protection. The problem with this is that these protective fortresses can become prisons and sometimes tombs!

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Here’s why this happens:

1. Targets of bullying have been outcasts for so long they don’t trust invitations to event. Even worst, they don’t trust people enough to even talk to them.

2. They get blamed for everything that goes wrong in the environment they’re stuck in.

3. They’ve been treated so badly that they’ve lost faith in humanity.

4. Bullies and their followers have, in the past, baited the target into trusting them somehow, all for the purpose of pulling a joke or prank on him. And the target can no longer risk being fooled again.

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Understand that people need human connection. And trust issues are a factor that re-enforces isolation and is no way for anyone to live. It’s a terrible existence and can sometimes create an opportunity for the target to commit suicide.

If you notice that your loved one is isolating themselves or is developing trust issues. It’s imperative that you lovingly talk to them, do a little investigating, and find out why.

Someone just might be bullying your loved one.

If a Bully or Someone Who Normally Mistreats You Starts Being Nice All of a Sudden, LOOK OUT! (Part 2)

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So, your bullies have suddenly had a change of heart. They’re finally treating you right. They’re finally talking to you like you’re equal to them. The bullies are smiling in your face, giving you pats on the back, and talking to you like you’re one of them and you belong.

But you’re smarter than what they give you credit for. You notice that the bullies are so sweet – too sweet. You think that if they don’t stop with the pleasantries soon, you’ll surely fall into a sugar coma!

You also notice a slight fakeness in the tones of their voices and that instead of making you feel good about yourself, they instead make you feel a little gross. But you don’t mention it to them. Just stay polite yet neutral.

The bullies are even inviting you to sleepovers, parties, cookouts, lunch and dinner dates, meetings, and family get-togethers. Every time these people talk to you, they seem to gush over you, and there again is that sick feeling in the pit of your stomach.

You grow suspicious of them, and rightfully so. And in your mind, you ask yourself, “Why are they acting so nice to me all of a sudden?”

You politely decline the invitations they extend to you. But trust me, they won’t give up so easily. There will be a few more tricks up their sleeves. You can bet on it.

Here’s another bad sign to look for:

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1. They’re nosey. The bullies will seem so interested in your life and in what you’re doing. But don’t be flattered. Chances are, they’re only probing you for information they can use against you later.

They will ask you a ton of questions about your family and what you do outside of school or work. Those questions are innocent enough. However, they will slowly and gradually move into more personal territory.

Bullies will begin asking you what your political views and beliefs are and about your religious views. You don’t have to answer those. It’s none of anyone’s business!

Before long, they will begin prying into your personal and private business. These snoops will ask your opinion of this person and that, who you’re dating, how you feel about this, that and the other. They will ask questions that anyone with a brain would know better than to ask. Some things are just off limits!

Bullies will even share with you some personal deets about themselves. But don’t be fooled! They’re only doing it to put you at ease and in hopes that you’ll share a few of yours. Again. Don’t fall for it!

Understand that any time someone asks questions that are none of their business, it’s a dead giveaway that they intend to use your answers against you. Don’t answer them!

Also, anytime people ask you very personal questions, it also means that they don’t respect your right to privacy. And be warned that when you refuse to let them in on your private business, they may come back and accuse you of “having something to hide.”

Don’t believe it! Because it’s not about having anything to hide, it’s about knowing that some things aren’t anyone’s business, and they should respect that.

Never share anything that you wouldn’t want anyone else to know!!!

If a Bully or Someone Who Normally Mistreats You Starts Being Nice All of a Sudden, LOOK OUT!

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If you are a target of bullying, you should beware if your bullies ever just up and all of a sudden, out of the blue, start being kind to you. Anytime bullies are up to something, they need you to let down your defenses. And how they get you to open up to them is to pour on the sweetness.

I want you to understand that if you see this sudden change in your bullies at school or in the workplace, they could be setting you up to be humiliated, to fail, to get in trouble with authority, or for a brutal physical attack.

Here are the signs:

1. A sudden change of heart – Nobody becomes a friend overnight. Friendship takes time because trust isn’t free; it’s earned. Trust needs a considerable amount of time to build. Just as you shouldn’t rush into a romantic relationship, neither should you rush into a friendship. If someone who usually is brutal toward you just up and begins treating you warmly, you’d better beat feet to the nearest exit- fast!

2. Flattery/Sweet-Talk – Bullies instinctively know that when a person is bullied over a certain amount of time, that person is more than likely hungry for any morsel of acceptance, approval, and kindness, and they take full advantage!

You’ll know that something is off because they’ll overdo the pleasantries. Bullies will use excessive flattery to get you to let your guard down and trust them. And man! Do they lay it on thick! If they’re so sickeningly sweet that you swear you’re getting a mouth full of cavities just listening to them, that’s your cue to find the door.

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3. A fake smile – As one verse in the old song goes, a smile is only a frown turned upside down. If they smile with their mouths and not with their eyes, it’s time to end the conversation and get away from those creeps.

4. Microflashes – If you pay close attention to their body language and facial expressions, you’ll notice those tiny, split-second flashes of contempt on their faces when they think you aren’t looking or paying attention. Don’t ignore those. Bid them goodbye and politely leave.

5. Giggling or smirking among themselves after you turn and walk away – Dead giveaway! Give these idiots the boot!

6. They will get furious when you politely decline any invitations or requests – Again! Steer clear. It only goes to show that they don’t respect you as a person with feelings, boundaries and human rights!

Also, it’s a sign that in their invitations or requests, they more than likely had plans for you that you don’t know about. Maybe they invited you to dinner or a party as a way to lure you to a possible set-up for something humiliating or dangerous? You never know. And if you don’t know, don’t go!

When it comes to bullies, always be on the lookout for anything out of the ordinary or that doesn’t feel right to you because that’s usually your clue. Your gut will always give you the correct answer. Listen to it.

It’s Not Only About Punishing Bullies. It’s About Helping Targets.

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Businesswoman blamed unfairly

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Holding bullies accountable isn’t the end all, be all. Yes, bullies must be exposed and made to take responsibility. I’ll agree with that. But!

A bully may be punished and severely so, but there’s no guarantee he/she will learn from it and leave the target alone.

In fact, it almost never works because in most situations, when a bully is caught and held responsible, it only further angers the bully and makes them that much more vindictive and determined to retaliate against the target.

In instances such as these, the objective should also be to take steps to care for and protect the victim.

If a bully sees that others are rallying around the target and showering him/her with love and support, the least likely he (the bully) will continue to harass that target or plot retaliation.

Remember that bullies are great big wusses at heart and prefer to catch the target alone and isolated because that is when the target is most vulnerable.

Giving support to a victim of bullying could be as simple as walking them home from school, praising them for an accomplishment or helping them to enroll in a self-defense class.

So, it you see someone being bullied, give them support and show you care. You never know. You could end up saving a life! You could be someone’s hero! How awesome is that?

Survivors of Bullying, Listen Up!

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Once you realize that the bullying you suffered in the past was no fault of your own and wasn’t because you were unloveable, nor because you were a bad person, you will be amazed at how much your confidence will skyrocket and how easy it will be to forgive.

I realize now that my bullies in school had issues and that their abuse of me was only their ways of covering up their own mental and emotional problems and projecting them onto another person.

In essence, my classmates were hiding behind me (Gee, they sound so pitiful and pathetic, don’t they?). Therefore, I can’t help but look back and feel sorry for them all.

You never asked to be treated the way they treated you and I want you to know that their opinions of you do not define you or your life, never did, and never will.

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Regardless of what happened, you are fantastic, beautiful and intelligent. You are strong! You are amazing! Do you know why? Because you survived! Even better, because you rose above it! And you’ve come so far!

So, please don’t be bitter because the past is the past and cannot be changed.

Continue to love and take care of yourself. Because as you’ve probably learned, no one else will do it for you.

For people to love you, you must love yourself first. You deserve it!

Sending you peace, love and prosperity!

Ultimate Guide to Overcoming Bullying

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Welcome to The Ultimate Guide to Overcoming Bullying, on this blog, you will learn how to overcome bullying and take back control of your life.

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The Ultimate Guide to Overcoming Bullying is a place you can come to for support and for learning about every aspect of bullies and bullying!

Being bullied is a hell that no human being should ever be subjected to. If you’re in the same predicament that I was in and people are constantly bullying you, you are doing all the research you can to learn how to protect yourself and defend against bullying. As a former target of bullying myself, I am giving you all the facts and successful tips, tricks, maneuvers, and mind hacks that I have used and now swear by.

After The Ultimate Guide to Overcoming Bullying teaches you about all of these facts and successful tips, maneuvers, and mind hacks, you will be wise to your bullies and their tactics. Most importantly, you will be ready when they come for you.

So, again, welcome to The Ultimate Guide to Overcoming Bullying, where you will learn all about the tips, maneuvers, and mind hacks that every victim of bullying should know about.

On The Ultimate Guide to Overcoming Bullying, You Will Learn:

1. The psychology of bullies.

In other words, you will learn about the bully mentality and mindset. Put simpler, you will learn how bullies think and what makes them tick.

Also, you will learn to pinpoint your bullies motives and intentions. Once you learn this, you will be able pick the brain of any bully. You will also be able to correctly guess their moods and dispositions so that you can be prepared and better protect yourself.

2. The Ultimate Guide to Overcoming bullying Blog Will Also Teach You The Different Types of Bullies and The specific tactics each type of bully uses.

As you learn the different types of bullies and their specific bully tactics, you will also learn the motivations and intentions behind each tactic. In other words, you will learn what each type of bully hopes to gain from each tactic they use and what outcomes they desire.

Additionally, you will learn how to spot each type of bully and better ways of countering their attacks or avoiding them altogether.

Once you learn these things, you will be better prepared to respond calmly and appropriately. This knowledge will also make you better able to avoid situations that could harm you or your reputation.

3. How to Properly Defend Yourself Against Bullies and Bullying of All Kinds.

You will learn that it is perfectly okay to defend yourself. Also, you,ll learn mind hacks you can use to buffer your self esteem against bullying attacks and passive-aggressive behavior.

4. The Ultimate Guide to Overcoming Bullying Will Also Teach You How to Boost Your Confidence and Attain Happiness and Personal Fulfillment.

Bullying can absolutely obliterate your confidence! This blog will teach you not only ways to maintain your confidence, but also how to regain it if bullying has destroyed it. Moreover, you will learn how not to care what people say or think of you.

You will also learn the importance of being yourself and why you should never change for anyone, especially bullies. Lastly, you will learn to stop people-pleasing and that you do not have to be nice if a situation doesn’t call for it.

5. How to spot fake friends and frenemies.

You will learn how to spot fakes and avoid them. Additionally, I will teach you how to use the knives in your back to cut ties. In others words, you’ll learn how to gather the courage to walk away from fake friends who betray you.

6. How to Set and Enforce Boundaries.

Moreover, you will learn the courage to say no to frenemies, users, and abusers and mean it. You will also learn what body language cues you can use to command and receive respect.

7. the Ultimate Guide to Overcoming bullying will teach you precisely what body language to look for in potential bullies.

You will learn what nonverbal signals bullies give when they are about to physically attack you. And once you do, you will better be prepared to stop them.

Also, you will learn whether people are laughing with you or at you and proper ways to respond in kind to people who throw zingers and subtle insults. Lastly, you will learn how to spot microaggressions and ways to mirror the people who use subtle intimidation tactics against you.

In a nutshell, this blog will tackle bullying from every angle, covering every aspect of bullying and subjects related to it.

8. All About Social Aggression and the Motives Behind it.

You will learn all about rumors, lies, gossip, and smear campaigns and how to protect yourself from them. You will also learn the motives and intentions behind them so that you can call it out and speak out bravely.

9. The Ultimate Guide to Overcoming Bullying Will Teach You How to Document Bullying and Gather Your own Evidence.

You will learn how to document the bullying you suffer, using the 5W method and how to organize your documents in a way that is clear, concise, and easily readable.

Also, you will learn about the use of digital recorders and hidden body cams to record the bullying so that you can easily prove your case to a principal, school board, HR manager, or a judge in a court of law. Most importantly, this blog will show you how to find out whether the laws in your state or area allow you to record bullying.

Now, at some point or another, many victims/targets of bullying have asked questions such as:

“How do I stop people from bullying me?”

“What is it about me that makes people see me as an easy target?”

“How do I make friends and allies and what exact steps do I need to take to do so?”

“What does it take to boost my charm?”

“What exactly do I need to do to get that allure that naturally draws friends and dates?”

If you find yourself asking these questions and other questions related to bullying, you will find the answers on this blog!

Hello, everyone! My name is Cherie White and I am a mom, writer, and anti-bullying advocate. Like you, I suffered many years of intense bullying in school and as a young adult. Because the bullying impacted me so deeply, I set out to know everything possible about bullying.

I searched for the answers to why people bully, what drove bullies to single out only certain individuals, and what bullies look for in potential victims. Also, I wanted to know how bullying affected different people and the specific characteristics that determined victimhood. Most importantly, I researched and practiced different ways to stop people from victimizing me and how to overcome bullying.

In short, instead of allowing it to traumatize me, I wanted to learn from it

Therefore, I began researching bullying in 1995 after discovering a magazine article about a boy who had been bullied in school and eventually overcome it. During the nineties, I poured through countless library books, magazine articles, news columns, anything relating to the subject of bullying. I read about the different personalities of bullies, bystanders, and victims. I also poured through books and articles on the subject.

Additionally, I researched bullying related to school and office politics, social infrastructures, and the power dynamic. For the last 20 years, I have learned so much. Coupling personal experience with years of trial and error, I eventually overcome bullying and took back control of my life.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful to have found the information and learned how to win the battle against bullying. However, it took me many years of not only research, but also trial and error before I was finally able to take back my personal power and declare victory over bullying. Although trial and error is progress, it is a slow and time-consuming process.

I Learned through Years of research and Trial and Error. But, Lucky You! You Don’t Have to!

With that said, one of the objectives of this blog is to save you years of trial and error. Another objective is to alleviate any confusion bullying may cause you. The material in this blog is material I wish was available when I needed it. In other words, I’d like to be the person for you that I needed when I was a target of bullying but didn’t have access to.

Today, too many young people are dying due to being the target of bullying. Children and teens are dying before their lives have even begun and it is a tragic waste of young life. Adults are dying before they have a chance to see improvement and it’s heartbreaking!

This is why I’m  passionate about re-empowering targets who endure bullying today. I know how it feels to be bullied by everyone for everything. It causes a pain so deep you can’t even cry!

What Can Happen When Bullies Target You?

When you endure bullying, many terrible things can happen. Friends you thought highly of and never thought would hurt you suddenly turn against you. Strangers will hear bad things about you and judge you before having the chance to meet you. Even worse, you will risk being physically assaulted.

Nevertheless, this blog will tackle all these scenarios and advise you of what you must do. I have respect for all other anti-bullying websites out there because they have the best intentions and truly desire to help victims. Of that, I have no doubt. However, as someone who has endured bullying in the past, I don’t feel that they get deep enough into the subject. In my humble opinion, they only gloss over the problem and there’s a lot to bullying they either leave out or haven’t though of.

This blog covers everything about bullying or related to it.

Why? Because bullying is so complex. It’s also a broad term and it’s hard to stop if you don’t know every tiny detail about it. That’s where we come in. This blog fills in all the holes and gaps.

So, here’s my message to victims and targets of bullying:

If people are mercilessly bullying you in school, work, or in the community, I want you to know that I’ve been right where you are. Also, I want you to be assured that the torment will not last forever. Even though you may not see an end to it now, there will come a day when you will be free of your tormentors. Therefore, you will be free to be your true authentic self without fear of ridicule. Know that all is not lost! You can go on to live a very happy, peaceful and prosperous life. I did it and you can do it too!

With knowledge comes empowerment!