Bullying and Toxic Conformity

Conformity can be good because we conform to sensible laws and rules in order to ensure a safe and well-run society. Conformity holds us together. However, toxic conformity is never good and can place us in danger.

What Toxic conformity brings:

Toxic conformity brings unawareness, silence to wrongdoings and injustices. Also, it promotes abuse of power and totalitarian authoritarianism.

In a toxic environment, bullies in power demand that you agree with everything they say and do. Right or wrong, they expect you to keep your mouth shut if you disagree. Moreover, you’re cannot give off any nonverbal language of opposition. In other words, you must go along if you expect to get along.

Because, if you don’t, the powers that be will subject you to ostracism, rejection, smear campaigns, even physical violence. And in extreme cases, the bullies in power will send mobs to your door. Consequently, you may endure physical torture and murder.

Schools and workplaces with a culture of bullying demand total conformity, absolute loyalty, or- toxic conformity. Totalitarian authoritarian communities and societies also demand these things. In these types of environments, there’s no margin for error.

Expect to be Ostracized if You Don’t Conform to a Bully’s Buffoonery

Moreover, you can’t deviate even the slightest bit without being punished in some way, shape, or form. And it doesn’t matter if the deviation was an honest mistake. In other words, they don’t allow you to be human. For instance, in schools and workplaces where people practice toxic conformity, creativity isn’t allowed. In communities and societies of this nature, the head honchos forbid free thought and expression.

Understand bullies see anyone who doesn’t conform to their rules and standards as a threat to their power. And they will make that person pay dearly for daring to be different. Anyone having the audacity not to stay in lockstep with their morals (or lack thereof), rules, and standards faces danger.

As I mentioned, if you dare to be different- to show creativity and talents, God help you. Having your own thoughts, opinions, and ideas puts you at risk of the bullies’ hatred and brutality.

Therefore, if you’re a target of bullying, it’s imperative that you find a way out of that environment. Otherwise, you may pay dearly with your health and peace of mind. I realize that it won’t be easy. Nothing worthwhile is easy.

 Change, especially positive change, is never easy.

However, persecuted people have uprooted and left their home countries for the US in order to attain freedom. And they found a better life. So, how much easier would it be to leave a toxic school or workplace? Find an environment where you’re free to be yourself, express different ideas, create, grow, and flourish. Only then will you truly be free!

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Why Bullies Usually End Up Eating Their Own

Bullies want to have a target or a victim. In fact, they need targets. To feel almighty and powerful, bullies must have people to dominate and subjugate. And having power over is extremely addictive to them. It’s like a drug. It’s why bullies repeatedly bully their targets over a a long period of time, years even. Because that “drug” wears off rather quickly and it won’t be long before your bullies come back for their next “fix.”

However, what happens when you finally realize who your bullies really are behind the tough facades, they put up? What happens when the masks fall off, and your bullies’ cowardice and insecurity come to light? Oooo! This is beginning to sound delicious, isn’t it?

Here’s what happens. Once the target sees these revelations, his confidence will get a big boost. The target will realize that she isn’t and never was the one with the issues. In this, he will find that it was the bullies who had the issues all along. Then, the target will finally have the courage to give the bullies the old proverbial middle finger and tell them all to go eat a fat one.

Moreover, the power dynamic will take a sudden shift and the scales will automatically tip in the target’s favor. In other words, the person will be a target no more. Remember that the best way to disempower bullies is to empower targets.

Because, once the target ceases to be a target, bullies no longer have power over him. Therefore, the bullies must go search for another target.

The Sudden Power Shift

When these bullies spot several potential targets, they’ll test the waters by performing several tests on these “potentials.” They will test these potential targets by watching them closely and launching subtle attacks and insults just to see how they react. But! What will the bullies do next, when things don’t go quite the way they expect? What happens when the potentials also give them the double middle finger?

Uh-oh, now they can’t find someone they can target! Curses! Now, what’s a poor bully to do? Simple. They begin eating their own. In other words, they turn on a member of their in-group.

That’s right, ladies and gentlemen! Once the bullying in-group runs out of targets on the outside, they have no choice but to turn their bullying inward and start bullying people within their group.

Remember that bullies need a target victim. They need someone to dominate and subjugate to have power because they can’t get power any other way. Without someone to ride roughshod over, to tell what to do, and to exert control over, bullies feel powerless. And you know what? They are!

With knowledge comes empowerment!

4 Jobs School Bullies Take Once They’re Out of School

Bullies thrive on power, dominance, and fear. They love positions of power and will often opt for jobs that give them either authority over people or prestige.

Here are some of the jobs bullies select.

1.Politician. Remember that well-seasoned bullies are the biggest and most convincing schmoozers, liars, and convincers on the face of the Earth. They have a way of steamrolling their ways to the top. And why not? They’ve been politicking since they were in diapers and often have connections in high places who give them boosts up the ladder. Should it be any wonder we have politicians who schmoozed constituents to get into office, then do nothing once they get there? This is not to say that all politicians are bullies, but all bullies seem to be politicians.

 2. Law Enforcement Officer. First, let me start by saying that most police officers are great people who have my utmost respect, especially in today’s climate. They do a difficult and thankless  job. They put their lives on the line every day to keep us all safe and to prevent criminals from harming law-abiding citizens and their families.

However, like any profession, law enforcement also has its bad apples. And when people who were bullies in school take these jobs, they often become those bad apples in their departments- the very people who put shame on the badge. These bullies will abuse their power at will.

And it isn’t fair to the good cops who sincerely want to make a positive difference and make our streets safer. The good cops are the ones who suffer when this happens.

3. Correctional Officer. Even correctional officers have authority over inmates- just not all inmates because there are some inmates who flat out run penitentiaries. It happens. Bullies pick this job because in prisons, they get free rain to do to “select” inmates, usually, the inmates at the bottom of the social order, whatever they want, and what are those inmates going to do about it? It’s their word against the bully CO’s and whose word do you think the warden will take?

Even worse, bully CO’s also abuse the good and decent CO’s who are competent and perform their jobs well. My last husband worked as a Corporal in a penal institution before he died. And he told me a few horror stories. I also, have friends who work in the TDOC system and they too tell me that it isn’t the inmates they must watch out for, it’s their coworkers.

 4. Supervisors and Managers. Again, bullies love positions of power and once they take those positions, they usually have carte blanche to abuse who they select to bully. I can’t count the stories I hear of workplace bullying and of bully bosses who get drunk on power and destroy others’ careers and lives.

It seems that bullies can’t live without having power over another.

With knowledge comes empowerment