Tag: self-love

self-love

Never Apologize for Who You Are

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Make no apologies for who you are nor what you stand for. And make no apologies for any successes nor victories you’ve had. Most importantly, make no apologies for loving yourself and going after what you want and deserve.

Bullies will get jealous of your successes and victories and try to undermine them. They give you backhanded compliments, accuse you of having “freak luck,” or call you an imposter.

Also, if you’re a confident and happy person, bullies will be jealous of that too. They will accuse you of being “full of yourself,” “arrogant,” “conceited,” and other such nonsense.

Turn a deaf ear to these haters!

Many times, bullying targets, after having been bullied for so long, end up apologizing for or explaining away the beautiful parts of their personalities because they have been forced by others to believe that something really is wrong with them. If this applies to you, I want you to stop doing that! You owe no one any apologies nor explanations for being YOU.

I want you to think about this: Perceptions are often wrong, and just because others “perceive” you to be less than does not mean that you are. Accept yourself, embrace the imperfections. You know the imperfections I’m talking about- the ones you can do nothing about, because we all have them. We wouldn’t be human if we weren’t a little flawed in some way, shape, or form. Stop apologizing, stop explaining, and begin loving yourself for all that you are.

Even The Most Confident Have Their Moments

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A few years ago, a thought occurred to me that even the most confident people have moments and days when they don’t feel so confident. I most certainly have them. I know where my talents are, I know all of my good qualities and bad, and I know who I am and what I want. However, I also know my limitations- it pays to know those too because confidence doesn’t mean arrogance.

If I don’t like something, I take steps to change it, and if it cannot be changed, I find ways to embrace it.

For the past decade, I have felt peace I never before knew. Yet, there are still days when I don’t feel as confident as I should.

There are times when I feel a tad insecure and nervous. There are times when I feel my old shyness trying to creep back in. After all it’s only human.

Only I refuse to give in to it. I give myself psychological pep talks to make the insecurity go away, then face the fear head-on.

Everyone has those days. So, when this happens to you, don’t toil over it. Accept it as a part of being human, and when insecurity does rear its ugly head, either use your mind to lessen the feelings or make them go away.

Even if you are a happy and confident person, there will be days when things go wrong, and there’ll be days when you just aren’t feeling it.

So, I hope you remember that just because you are having a day when you don’t feel so good, it does not mean that you are not a strong, resilient, and confident person. It just means that you are human, and just like everyone else, you will have downtimes and bad times. Just keep the faith because those times never last.

You Should Never Let Bullies Tell You What to Do

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A crazy young man in a white shirt standing and screaming at a woman in a pink dress. Women don’t care and looking at the camera with a toothy smile—indoor studio shot, isolated on light brown background.

Targets should never give in to their bullies’ demands nor requests, no matter what. And they should never let their bullies talk them into anything. I know, I’m one to speak because many times, years ago, I caved in.

However, knowing what I know now, I’d take a beating before I’d give in to them because I realize that I’d more than likely have to take a beating anyway. Bullies are known for constantly changing their rules and demands to fit their needs and narratives.

Understand that bullies may give you empty promises and false incentives. They may sweet talk you, or they may threaten you with even more exclusion, more smears of your name, and more bullying.

But here’s the thing. Here’s something that targets don’t think about:

You can’t lose something you never had. Your bullies already hate you, and they already want to hurt you. So, it’s not like you can lose any ground with them because you never had it in the first place.

So think about it. Dig deep and think.