Believe it or not, it’s easy to tell when someone is being controlled. If you pay attention, you’ll always know if a person you know is being told what to say, what not to say, what to do, and what not to do.
If you are a target of bullying, you more than likely suffer at the request of a powerful ringleader. You may have had friends and allies at first, but you’ve found that slowly, those friends and allies have only disappeared and now, you have no one left who will associate with you, much less help you.
Do you know why? It’s because your bullies have gotten to them somehow. They have either threatened to retaliate and harm them if they have any more to do with you, or they may have given them good incentives to turn against you- social and financial perks, promotions, rewards, etc.
So, how can you tell when a person is compromised?
1. They flip-flop back and forth. This person will say whatever they’re told to say and that often means they have to flip-flop. They say one thing, then later say the opposite. They say whatever they think will benefit them, or, at least, keep them out of hot water.
2. They say anything they think people want to hear no matter how irrational and stupid they may sound. Again, this goes back to flip-flopping and bullies do change narratives often, so, the puppet must change with their puppet-masters and handlers if they want to stay in their good graces.
3. They go with whatever the prevailing narrative or belief is. These people will fall in line quick. You can always tell a follower because they stay in lock step with your bullies. They quote whatever quote is popular, say whatever is popular, wear whatever the bullies are wearing, and act however they must, in order to stay on the bandwagon. In short, they’re a bunch of wannabes trying haplessly to fit into the bullies’ world of morals and standards.
4. They’re a chameleon. This person will behave one way around this person and another way around that person. Understand that this person has no personality of their own. They change personalities like a model changes clothes.
5. They can’t think for themselves. Again, these people never think for themselves. They only flex and bend to anything others tell them. They’ve been sucked into the group-think. God help them if they ever had an original thought. Or worse, took a stand (gasp!).
6. They’re easily led and influenced. Life must really suck if you need someone to hold your hand in order to make decisions and choices. But some people would rather be controlled than to go out on a limb and choose for themselves.
They’re under the belief that it’s better to have security than to have freedom. That freedom and independence are too risky because they just might fail!
It’s true that being your own person involves a lot of risk. To be independent and have your own thoughts and opinions will invite the risk of failure and the enmity of a few others. But understand that anyone who doesn’t like you because you prefer to be yourself is more than likely a controlling person- an abuser, a bully, a narcissist. That’s right. Only people who like to control others hate those who are independent and who think for themselves.
So, why would you want to please those types of people? Why would you want to have a puppet-master? Understand that only objects have owners. And you’re not an object, you’re a person with your own thoughts, feelings, opinions and beliefs. Keep it that way!
If you’re a target of bullying and your friends and allies have turned their backs on you, it’s best that you have nothing more to do with them and find new friends outside of the bullying environment.
You don’t want friends who are sheep and too weak to have your back when the chips are down. Trust me on that one. You want strong friends and allies- people who aren’t too chicken to have your back and are more than happy to go to bat for you. That’s what real friends do!
You want the types of friends who are hard to find, not those who are a dime a dozen. Know that you deserve better!
With knowledge comes empowerment!
I have an Aunt like this!! My sister is the bully and the master manipulator, and for years my Aunt was her pawn, but recently my Aunt broke away from my sister’s strings and she is ready to reclaim her life and pursue the relationships that were forbidden. Only God can restore this way!!
– And I will restore or replace for you the years that the locust has eaten..Joel 2:25
Such an awesome outcome! 💖💐🌻 I’m so glad your aunt found God and took back her personal power! She’s no longer a victim, she’s a victor! 🎉🏆
Thank you so much for sharing this 🙏☺️
I trust God. Surely He will take care to remove bully. Only matter of time.
Regards 😊🙏
Absolutely, He will! One way or another! 💯
😊🙏
Surely
Amen
“Surely He will take care to remove bully. Only matter of time” I was heartbroken about the broken relationships and the loss of time- but God calls those lost years- temporary!! I trust Him Also🙌🏾
Thanks so Much For sharing Your thoughts and comments💕💕
Thank you so much for your comments. Your words have encouraged me. i can not break relation. My society and other rules etc are not easy for braking a marriage. however i Trust God and I beleive in Lord Jesus since my child hood. many miracles happened in life.
Therefore I have accepted this Bully, who is my life partner, but to hell with this bully.
Just hard core!
Still I beleive in almighty.
Thank you so much for your kind words.
My name is Arun
Nice meeting you TamwearyStay blessed always
Thank You for explaining your situation Arun. I would love to know more about your culture and Society. But Today, I have prayed for you and will continue to Pray for You. Stay Encouraged and Stay in prayer- The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much!! (James 5:16)
Thank you so much for your prayers.
I believe that your prayers will work.
Only thing I need is that my Bully stops all nonsense. Let her stop all crookedness.
Let there be a normal relationship.
I am thankful to you.
I stay encouraged and stay in continuous prayers. That is my meditation.
Regards.🙏😊🙏
You’re in my prayers as well, Arun. 🙏🙏🙏
God is great
God has sent you as an angel 😇
I wish to share my experiences in my college days, when Lord Jesus did miracles for me during my Physics practical exam while I was persuing Graduation.
Since I was true Christian that time, as I used to preach Gospels, my professor used to tease me for all my activities.
But I completed my exam 2 practicals in no time with accurate results.
Professor conveyed me messages through my hostel mates that “ARUN has changed my wrong notion”
😊😇😀
That’s such a blessing, Arun! I’m so glad that you made it to graduation!
Yes Cherie!
So I am happy that Lord Jesus loves me. But bully is bully. Let her go to hell for her activities.
😇😀😌🙏
Absolutely. The only one responsible for her is her.
😌🙏
You’re are So Welcome.God does indeed hear You!!
-And God heard the voice of the youth, and the angel of God called to Hagar out of heaven and said to her, What troubles you, Hagar? Fear not, for God has heard the voice of the youth where he is. (Gen 21:17)
My best regards to you. I am thankful to you
🙏😌
😊🤗😊🤗
By the way I noticed that you have a Physics background…My daughter is studying quantum engineering and the University of Chicago.
That’s awesome! ❤️ I wish your daughter much success in her studies amd in her chosen career field!
Thanks Cherie!!💕
You’re very welcome. 🙂
Tomorrow’s Trivia Thursday topic is going to be ‘Bible Bullies’ – I expect you to ace the exam Cherie💕👍🏾🙌🏾😂
I’ll be there! Let me know when you post! 🙂
Will Do!!💕
Great that your daughter is studying Quantum Engineering.
Quantum physics and quantum biology is modern science since in 1905.
As you know that Newtonian physics (classical physics) does not believe in God and His creation.
But New physics (quantum) believes in God and His creation.
The wave-particle duality is the basis of quantum foundation in physics. A particle is believed to be present in one place or at different places even in different galaxies.
Quantum entanglement is unique topic in that field.
The theory of quantum physics is now applied in quantum engineering. Very interesting subject and difficult too.
When I did my graduation in 1980, then quantum physics was not popular and I didn’t study that time.
But by the grace of God, I got chance to do basic course on quantum physics from reputed institute of technology in India.
Thank you so much for your comments.
I wish your daughter will bring a great achievement in the field of quantum engineering.
My best regards to you.
😊🙏😌
“But New physics (quantum) believes in God and His creation.” This is Great News!! 💕We are extremely proud of her. Thank You so much for you well wishes! Tomorrow I am doing a Blog on Bible Bullies- make sure you watch for this.
I can’t wait! One Bible bully I remember off the top of my head was Jezebel. Others were King Saul, Delilah, Joseph’s brothers, and Nebuchadnezzar.
Delilah is a really good one, so is Nebuchadnezzar.
Yes they are! I think Jezebel was the worst though!
She vexed him so…She was like the contentious woman in Proverbs 27:5
– A continual, non-stop drip- how annoying!!
A ball and chain to Ahab!
Thank you so much
I will be waiting for your blog.
Regards 😊🙏
I did not have any knowledge on bullies, and how they target. After reading most of your posts, i understood, how I am being bullied.
I am also astonished that how a dull headed, less qualified, with full of unethical practices, a bully can control an intelligent, honest and hard working sincere guy?
How? Please tell me Cherie!
I am really astonished.
Your posts, and this post is pointing me all that you have mentioned are true for me.
I am not a fighter
I can not fight and I will not fight.
I trust GOD, I believe, HE will do the needful. Will do something to blow the Bully. Only one bully is real hell. Oh my GOD! get this bully out
Finally, accept my best and kind regards Cherie. You are an Angel!!!😊🙏🙏🙏
Less intelligent bullies control more intelligent targets with FEAR, Arun. When you decide that you aren’t going to be intimidated by the bullies, you take away their power! Always remember that, Arun. Your bully doesn’t have the power they make you think they have. Know that you have more power than you know. Sending you lots of love and light! 🤗🤗🤗
Thank you so much. Getting knowledge from you. still i dont know why bully does this. Just double and unethical behaviour. Dishonest. Not loyal, not at all. What a creation!! Disgusting!
But I do not have FEAR.
Only I get disturbed, when i am being teased and abused.
Thank you so much for your love and care.
God is almighty😊🙏🙏
Yes he is. I believe your bully is acting out because he’s jealous and insecure. You once said that anytime you’re happy or get recognition for a good deed or job well done, your bully gets angry and acts out. That’s a really tell all right there- he feels jealous of you and feels that you’re taking the spotlight off him. Bullies crave attention and admiration and your bully feels that you’re stealing his spotlight.
She is so
When life partner is bully
What can be done?
I got my answer 😃🙏
Oooh! A life partner? That’s when you must end the relationship. I know that’s difficult to do especially if you love the person. But you have to live yourself enough to know when someone is harmful to you and it’s time to walk away. 🚶♀️
Cherie
You are absolutely right. But breaking at this juncture is not possible. Here rules are stringent.
On the other hand I have adopted the path of austerity on desires.
I have found the path of Enlightenment.
Therefore, I am able to digest all the blows from Bully whether it is teasing or abusing or anything bull sheet she is talking.
You may be happy to know that since last 5 years I have been studying extensively, the ancient philosophy and quantum physics. I have started writing blogs and found great motivators like you in this world of blogging.
all these are working as shock absorber.
The biggest blow of betrayal by the bully was a kind of deadly threat for me when I detected it on social media.
I have been reading your posts, when i discovered it is bulling that you are creating awareness among the victims.
Your posts have worked well for me in building positive and powerful state of mind.
I am thankful to you.
Regards 😊🙏🙏
You’re most welcome, Arun. 😊 Do what you think is best.
😊🙏☺️
Excellent article, Cherie. Thanks. Roughly half the country…
Thank you so much, RJ! 😊 I totally agree!
Articles like this is why your writing is so important.
Aww! Thank you, Jack! 😊
So true!! I could definitely see this happening to my mom at times
It’s sad when you see it happening to a loved one because in many cases there’s nothing you can do for them. 😥
So true 😔
🤗🤗🤗
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