Everyone deals with jerks and disrespect, but not everyone gets bullied.
Jerks and disrespect are a normal part of life. Bullying, on the other hand, is a whole other animal. Although a jerk’s behavior is hurtful and negative, it does not mean that it can be classified as bullying.
When is hurtful behavior classified as bullying, and how do we tell the difference between bullying and disrespect? What is the difference between a jerk and a bully?
When a person is “just being a jerk,” his/her bad attitude is random, sporadic, and directed at anyone at any time.
On the other hand, bullying is when the ill-treatment becomes a habit or pattern and is directed towards one person in particular- the same person over time.
Bullying requires a target! It is systematic, deliberate, vicious, and always escalates over time. Bullying involves smear campaigns, witch hunts and is relentless. Bullying seeks to destroy.
A jerk is afraid you might want something from him.
A bully wants something from you.
Because of bullying, many targets become jerks. They do this for their own protection.
Absolutely they do, Michael. And you’re right- it’s a defense mechanism.
I can attest to this. Because of the bullying I received in junior high, I was a bit of an obnoxious jerk in my freshman year of high school.
I can’t say I blame you. I was one too, for many years.