Tag: bullying

unwanted, aggressive behavior among school-aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time.

Rumors and Lies Breed False Memories

1 Comment

As rumors and lies circulate, details are included and added to the stories, and these details have a way of being inserted into people’s memories. There have been cases of burglaries where the homeowners “thought they saw” an unarmed burglar with a gun when, in fact, there was no gun.

Understand that in these cases, people don’t lie on purpose. They really and truly believe they saw a gun in the criminal’s hand or his pocket. They actually “remember” seeing it.

And the reason they remember it so plainly is that they’ve heard and talked about it so much their brains filled in the blanks with the details based on what they heard. Another reason for false memories is that when bullies ask questions such as,

“Did you see her do this?”

“Did you hear him say that?”

they only suggest that she did do this, or he did say that- the Power of Suggestion at work.

It’s so easy to influence people’s memories by presenting something in a particular way. Also, the memory will adjust itself according to a person’s stereotypes and expectations. People see what they expect to see.

Too often, people’s memories depend on social expectations- what they expect the target to do and not what he is actually doing.

Understand that memories are mistakable and can be falsified. Sure. And whether accurate or make-believe, once it becomes a memory, there’s no way to tell the difference.

If you’re a target of bullying, I want you to realize that this does happen and that you must make preparations accordingly to protect yourself better.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

2 Reasons Why Ignoring Bullies Won’t Make Them Go Away

12 Comments

I cannot count the times I was advised by both family members and teachers to “just ignore them.” – to ignore my bullies and their guff. However, when I took that advice, I found out that it only made the situation worse.

They only escalated their attacks. Ignoring bullies is a slap in the face to them because they’re about taking power any way they can. When you ignore them, you proverbially thumb your nose at them. You send them the message that you refuse to bow down to them or let them scare you. This is not a bad thing, don’t get me wrong. You’re handling it the best way you can and that makes you the better person.

But the problem is that when you ignore the bullies, one of two things happen:

1. It only infuriates the bullies. They become much more determined to “get you.” And they won’t stop until they do. I want you to realize that if bullies can’t get any reaction out of you, they will push you and push you until you snap. They will then claim that you are mentally imbalanced. Or they might physically attack you.

2. Bullies mistake your ignoring them for fear. Bullies are like a pack of wolves. If they even think they smell fear, look out! Anytime bullies think you’re afraid of them, they know they have you and they move in for the kill. They’ll bully just for fun and the power rush they get from your (perceived) fear. And they won’t stop because they won’t be able to get enough of that power high. Understand that the high they get is no different than a drug. Once they’re addicted to bullying you, they’ll always come back when that rush wears off and they need another fix.

It’s much better to stand up to them and set boundaries from the start. Never let it go one for long without asserting yourself. Look the bullies in the eyes and tell them in no uncertain terms that you’re the wrong one and that you won’t tolerate their crap. If you take a stand right when the harassment begins, chances are good that they’ll back off and go find someone else to jerk around.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

The Number One Indicator A Bully is Guilty of Something

4 Comments

How do you know a bully is guilty of something?

Easy! They’re busy accusing someone else of it.

Bullies are notorious for projecting. Anything they accuse you of doing, you can bet dollars to doughnuts they’re doing it. Put another way, bullies do the same things they accuse innocent targets of doing. Understand that this is how they tell off on themselves.

There’s so much truth to the saying that, any time you point a finger, there are always three pointed back at you.

Humans can never know the inner workings of anyone else but themselves. They see from their own perspectives and speak from their own thoughts and attitudes. It is why most cheating spouses will often accuse the other spouse of doing the cheating. Every wife or husband who’s ever been cheated on knows that this is a red flag that’s all too common.

Realize that any time you have some schmuck accusing you of something terrible that you know in your heart you’re not guilty of, the chances are high that your accuser(s) is/are the one(s) guilty of it. Projection is one of the oldest tricks in the book.

blame accuse pointing finger

Remember the quotes of Joseph Goebbels, a well-known propaganda minister:

“Accuse the other side of that which you are guilty.”

And…

“A lie told once remains a lie. A lie told a thousand times becomes the truth.”

So, understand that when bullies project, they’ll repeat the same lie over and over again until people (even you if you aren’t careful) begin believing it.

The more you know!

The One Thing That Gets Targets of Bullying in The Most Trouble

12 Comments

Overreacting. Any overreactions to the taunts, insults, and attacks of bullies only bring more problems targets would otherwise avoid if they stayed calm. Unfortunately, I learned this lesson through time-consuming trial and error, and it could’ve gotten me either maimed or killed. But you don’t have to.

Overreacting can have a boomerang effect because when you get overly excited, the chances are that the bullies will too- especially bullies who are overly aggressive. Overdoing the response could cause the altercation to escalate into something you may not be able to walk away from. Also, the bullies could use your overreaction against you.

The target’s overreaction is how bullies feign victimhood and make the victim look like the aggressor. It’s how bullies bait their victims. So why not use a different strategy?

Chess board and text “Strategic plan” Business planning concept

The smart thing to do is to fake a surrender or submission. Make it look as if you’re giving in to your bullies’ demands. I realize this may feel a bit cowardly to you, but you aren’t caving in, you’re only making your bullies think you are. So, remain calm and make them believe they have the upper hand. Doing so will stabilize the bully’s temper.

But wait! There’s another benefit! Your bullies more than likely expect or even want you to react with a high degree of aggression. But you don’t, and it will throw them off guard. It will surprise, even shock your bullies, because you remained calm and agreed with them. The surprise is a powerful weapon if you know how to use it.

Use your fake surrender as part of a bigger plan once you fool them into thinking you care. On the inside, you continue to stand your ground, but on the outside, you give in to their desires. Doing so can give you time to quietly plan a countermeasure that will bring the bullies down. Smarts will always trump aggression every time!

However, understand that this takes a truckload of self-discipline and self-control. And, as mentioned earlier, you may feel like a big old wimp when you use this technique. Just remember this: You’re not giving the bullies what they want. You only look like you are. You’re only playing dead to save your life!

Here’s a third benefit. By faking your submission, you also allow yourself time to study your bullies and carefully plot any future moves. And when the bullies are satisfied and lay off you, you’ll finally have room to make your countermove.

So, go ahead—fake your submission. Get close to your bullies and learn their ways. Give them no reason to react, nothing to prepare for, and no cause for resistance. Then when the time is right, BAM!

They won’t know what hit them.

Any time you make it look as if you submit to your bullies, you’re only mocking them. It’s silent disdain – like expelling a silent fart in their direction, only they don’t know they’ve been farted on.

You turn their own power against them and make them look like idiots. But they can’t retaliate because you did what they told you to do. Right?

With knowledge comes empowerment!

It’s No Use Trying to Change Other People

11 Comments

Many targets of bullying try so hard to get others to like them, only to drive them further away instead. It all boils down to this: You are trying to change them.

Don’t. Because you can’t. I say this because anytime you try to change someone, they will sense that and only double down. Stop thinking about them because they aren’t worth the extra time and energy.

And why would you want the approval of people who only use and abuse you? Why do you even want those people in your life? I want you to realize that anyone who bullies you is the last person who deserves a spot in your life.

Or you could look at it another way: Would you want another person to try and change you? How would you feel if the roles were reversed? You’d feel even more resentment toward the other person, wouldn’t you? I would.

No one wants to be force or made to feel compelled. Including you. Besides, your bullies are already trying to force you to feel bad about yourself. They’re already trying to exert control over you. Do you really want to crawl behind people like them? Yuck!

Instead of focusing on them, focus on yourself and your goals and dreams. Get busy doing you. Be a little selfish. This is the time when you should make it all about you.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Bullies and Narcissistic Entitlement

16 Comments

Bullies of the narcissistic variety truly believe they’re better than and more important than anyone else. They believe the world revolves around them and owes them. They believe that they deserve better treatment. They think people should favor them and bow down to their every whim. They really have grandiose delusions of themselves, how others are supposed to treat them, and how the world is supposed to work.

Narcissistic bullies will take advantage of others and exploit their weaknesses for their benefit. They have no empathy and have no care how they hurt their targets. They pass unfair and ridiculous judgements on their targets, or anyone they deem inferior.

Narcissists have very fragile egos, and they feel threatened by anyone who outshines them in any way. They put up mental walls to keep threatening messages and info from penetrating their grandiose sense of self-importance and those walls are supported by the insults they hurl at their targets.

(Narcissism as a protective barrier)*

Narcissistic bullies can’t handle social rejection and they react fiercely to people they feel threatened by. Less than perfect evaluations send them into a fury. They protect and re-enforce their grandiose but fragile egos by criticizing any negative evaluations and feedback.

Many narcissistic bullies use grandiosity as a cover-up for their feelings of vulnerability, inadequacy, and incompetence. They’re deathly afraid that their shortcomings will be exposed, so, they hurl disparaging remarks and ugly names at others to distract others from their own flaws.

That’s why they need targets to project their own issues of insecurity, fear, and self-loathing. They are really quite pathetic when you stop and think about it.

It’s so easy to see why narcissists are so hateful and hurtful. They need to hurt people to feel better about themselves.

Normal people, especially confident people, don’t feel the need to constantly fire off zingers to intentionally hurt other people. Therefore, they don’t have to have a target because they have a healthy sense of self.

No. People who are truly confident and not narcissists like to get along with everyone and enjoy seeing others happy. They have a love for other people and empathy for those who are hurting.

While narcissists degrade others and need a target, healthy and confident people have a more favorable view of everyone, including people who are targets of bullying. Confident people who love themselves do not need to put others down.

On the other hand, a narcissist feels that the only way they can love themselves is to put others down- including those who aren’t necessarily a threat to their grandiose views of themselves.

Narcissists feel their value comes from having power, riches, good looks, and popularity. Whereas, confident people get theirs from having healthy relationships with the people who mean the most to them and from having positive experiences with them.

And these are the differences between narcissists and people who are truly confident.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Attitudes You Deal with When You Encounter Bullying Behavior

6 Comments

When a target encounters bullies and their unacceptable behavior, he/she often feels dehumanized. They also feel canceled- erased- blotted out! To the bullies, the target’s feelings don’t matter because the target isn’t human to them. Understand that once the target is successfully dehumanized, it becomes much easier for bullies and others to brutalize them.

To the bullies, the target shouldn’t exist. And trying to defend themselves against the brutality only leaves the target exhausted and run down. He/she also goes through severe mental anguish and intense emotional pain. Fear grips the target like a vice because there’s always a risk of a brutal physical assault.

Understand that bullies don’t want to hear or understand the target. They only want to hurt him/her and control their life- every aspect of it. All bullying behavior, whether subtle (such as a micro flash of contempt), or obvious (such as a fit of rage heavily sprinkled with horrible names and expletives) only attempts to harm and control.

It doesn’t matter if the behavior is ridiculous and complete nonsense. When bullies have an outburst, they don’t see themselves as being ridiculous and irrational, even if others do. They see themselves as justified and right and the target deserving of persecution and being controlled.

With that said, I want you to see it for what it is- an attempt by the bullies to control, dominate, and harm. It’s an effort to take away your power, autonomy, freedom, and happiness.

And once you see this, it’s imperative that you walk away from these people and not give them one nanosecond of your time. You must do what you have to do to keep yourself safe. As far as you’re concerned, they are dead to you.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Bullying Is a Form of Theft- Getting Back What They Stole From You

10 Comments

By nature, children are happy and carefree. Their only responsibilities are to obey their parents and guardians and to complete homework and a few chores. Outside of those responsibilities, they engage in play and pretend, or they’re supposed to.
Bullying has a way of stealing everything that matters from you.

Bullying steals your happiness and takes the joy out of life.

It strips you of your confidence and self-esteem, and with them your sense of safety, security, and peace of mind.

Bullying takes away your dignity and respect, and with it your pride.

Bullying gags you, silencing your voice and overall ability to communicate.
It robs you of self-expression.

Bullying snatches away love and belonging.

It steals your ability to think for yourself and forge your own path in society.

After a while, it tires you out, wears you down, and zaps you of energy.

Bullying steals your childhood and causes you to grow up way to fast. It takes away your innocence and faith in humanity. If you’re a bullied adult, it takes away dignity, respect, and good-standing in a community.

In a nutshell, it robs you of power, of autonomy, and of freedom!

But!

As with anything that is stolen, you can always get it back! And how you get it all back is by keeping company with those who love and uplift you, indulging in your hobbies, displaying your talents, focusing on your goals and dreams, and reciting affirmations every day! You also get it back by working on yourself. You do it by changing your thinking!

Here’s a quick note: I’ve found that when I focus on my goals and where I want to go in life, I don’t have time to focus on any bullying or negativity! Try it! You’ll love it!

I won’t lie to you. It will be tough, and it will take a while. But nothing worth anything is easy or quick. Right?

You’ll never get back the years they bullied you. But if you put in the inner work needed, you’ll eventually get back your confidence, your dignity and everything else they took from you.

I promise you! It’s worth it in the end and you’ll be so glad you were patient and put in the work!

The 7 Purposes of Ridicule and Why Bullies Use It

9 Comments

 

Ridicule is indeed one of the most powerful weapons against a target. No one wants to be ridiculed. Many people, in fact, consider death to be a better option. However, we must continue to remind ourselves that there are reasons bullies use it and the number one reason is to contain threats to their status and power.

In other words, anytime your bullies dial up the ridicule, it’s likely because they see you as threat. Maybe they’re on high alert because you somehow give them the impression that you see through their bullshit and that you just might expose them to the rest of the world and cause them to lose respect and topple them from their proverbial thrones.

And now, they must do some damage control. You made trouble for them and now they must jump through hoops to re-enforce their power and control of you. Because, if they can’t have power over you or anyone else, they deem inferior, then who can they have power over? Who else is there to dominate?

Understand that this is how bullies’ minds operate. So, without further ado, here are the 3 purposes of ridicule:

1.To silence you. As I’ve stressed many times before, anytime you report bullying or speak out against it, bullies will turn up the ridicule. They’ll laugh and call you “crazy,” “crybaby,” “whiner,” “wuss,” or other such names. Trust me. It’s all designed to shut you up and give the appearance that you’re weak and they’re still in control and unafraid.

 But they’re very afraid. So, they use something they know is likely to work- and stick.

2. To ruin you in the eyes of others. Ridicule has a powerful contagion effect and bystanders love to join in. And once you get ridiculed a few times, you become an outcast and at the bottom of the pecking order. Once you’ve lost respect, you’ve lost credibility as well.

3. To induce fear of social rejection. As mentioned earlier, many people fear death less than they do social rejection and alienation. Ridicule is the best way to mar a person in the eyes of others. Once a person is ridiculed, people shun them because they fear that if they associate with the target, they may be ridiculed and rejected too.

4. To keep you under their thumb. When people ridicule a target, they’re asserting power and dominance over that person. Ridicule is one of the best ways to strip someone of their personal power and lord dominance over them.

5. To punish you for stepping out of your place. Whether you speak out against abuse, you succeed at something, or outshine who perceive themselves to be the “ruling clique,” in the minds of bullies, you’re stepping out of your place, and you must be dealt with, not only as punishment, but to be made an example to others that this could happen to them to if they get out of line.

6. To keep you subdued. Fear keeps most people subdued and and the ruling clique in power. When you’re afraid, you’re more than likely to keep your head down and go along to get along.

7. To shame and humiliate you. Shame and humiliation are also powerful weapons, and they break your self-esteem very easily. Bullies use these to weaken you and take the fight out of you. And once your self-esteem is broken, you’re least likely to defend yourself.

In a nutshell, ridicule is designed to strip you of power. However, if you see the ridicule for what it is and know the reasons behind it, your self-esteem is less likely to take a big hit and you will better be able to stand against it and let the bullies know that you won’t be jerked around. Remember that this knowledge can be a power all its own.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Why It’s So Important for Targets to Meet New People Outside the Bullying Environment

15 Comments

If you’ve ever been a target of relentless and excessive bullying, meeting people, especially new ones, can be paralyzing. I can relate because I’ve been there. It’s easy to withdraw from social situations because you’re afraid the new person you meet will reject you. After all, it seems that everyone else you know already has, and you just can’t take another chance of it happening again.

But never be afraid to meet new people because they are opportunities for you to make friends and allies. Total strangers are the best people to meet and establish connections with. They make the best potentials because you have no history with them. They don’t know you from the bullying environment, so, you aren’t a target to them and likely will never be one.

With total strangers, you can begin with a clean slate and have opportunities to put your best foot forward and get a fresh start.

Therefore, when you meet someone new, don’t be shy or nervous. Find out what you have in common with the person to establish common ground. Be genuinely interested in the person because people love the one who’s interested in them and their lives. Make small talk and show them the awesome, one in a million you.

I promise you that you’ll be glad you did, and your confidence and self-esteem will shoot up tenfold!

With knowledge comes empowerment.

Bullies Who Bully People for Superficial Reasons

14 Comments

Many people think their superior to those who make less income than they do. Oakley, TN was and still has many of those who have that attitude, unfortunately. Don’t let me wrong, not all of the people in the town are like this.

There are several people there who are down to earth, friendly, and don’t care about those things if you treat people well- if they like you, they like you no matter what your station in life is. However, the true, authentic people seem to be vastly outnumbered by the superficial bullies there.

There have been many occasions when I’ve seen waitresses in a restaurant being treated like dirt by fat cats and fake fat cats who never tip them and talk terrible to them. I’ve seen janitors and custodians degraded by other employees in a few workplaces I’ve been employed at, by other employees who were in higher positions. And many of these menial workers were awesome people with hearts of gold.

Yes, bullies treated these people like cockroaches they wanted to exterminate.

I’ve also seen these bullies bully people who were less attractive. I’ve witnessed bullying of people over the clothes they wear, the car they drive, the family they come from, etc.

Understand that when people value material possessions more than they do people, they don’t think that material possessions can be lost so easily.

They don’t think about the fact that they could end up in a car accident and lose their ability to work. Their so-called riches may all go to hospital bills. Then what will they have? If you define yourself by the possessions you have, what happens if you lose it all?

But! That’s not the only problem they’re have. Others will also remember how these bullies treated them and not care to help them. And their materialistic and smug friends who hung around them because of what they had? They’ll only discard them like yesterday’s garbage because once they’re broke and disabled, their high-flying friends will have no more use for them.

Bullies who bully you because you’re less attractive. I’ve seen some “beautiful people” mistreat those who are average-looking. Their arrogance is out of this world because they never stop to think that beauty is fleeting- it always fades over time. Let’s face it, we’ll all end up old, toothless, and ugly if we live long enough.

Judge Judy Sheindlin had a point when she stated that, “Beauty fades, dumb is forever.” And I would much rather be ugly and smart than beautiful and stupid. Intelligence lasts longer!

And what happens if they get disfigured in an accident?

What happens if they end up bullying the wrong person? Perhaps some psycho nut-bag who ends up sneaking up behind them, calling out their name, and throwing a bucket of acid in their face as soon as they turn around, or slashing their face with a box-cutter?

Though I would never condone such a sick and depraved act, I have enough sense to realize that this has happened before and still does. We can’t deny that such crazy, messed up, and vengeful people exist, and you never know who’s a raving lunatic and who isn’t.

And here’s another thing about material possessions and riches. At the end of the day, you can’t take any of it with you when you go. So, what do you have?

Sure, those things are wonderful to have, and I sure wouldn’t mind having a million dollars. Who would? But just because you have those things don’t mean you bully those who don’t because you don’t know what they must go through to get what they do have.

Again, you can’t take it with you when you go. When it’s all said and done, the only thing any of us will have, is a rock and a hole in the ground.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Addressing Women Who Date Lowlifes

49 Comments

Throughout my lifetime, I’ve known many women who seemed to pick shady and nasty characters to date. I’m talking about smart and beautiful women who you know can do better if they’d be a little more selective!

I’ve found that many of these women date no-count losers who don’t treat them well. I’ve seen their partners degrade these poor women and try to control them. Many of these partners are either broke, jobless, or working dead-end jobs.

Several of these bad partners and spouses are in and out of jail and who always have their women post bail for them. And this becomes a cycle. Even sadder is the fact that many of these smart and beautiful women either move in with or marry these losers, then end up having to keep these scrubs up!

These women will pay their partner’s bills and try to make life easier for them, only to be disrespected by them later.

Let me give you my opinion here. And this opinion may tick a lot of people off, but I’ll say it anyway.

Unless they are sick and can’t work, any significant other who lives off a woman or works and spends the money on themselves rather than contributing to the home is a sorry sack! That’s how I view them. Still, many smart, talented, and beautiful women end up with just the type.

But why?

It’s because many of these women have low self-esteem. They’re blind to their beauty, intelligence, and strength. They’re afraid of being alone and don’t think they can do any better than these worthless partners. So, these women take what they think they can get and settle for so much less than what they deserve.

Also, they think that they can change the person or that the person has “potential.” So, again, in order to keep from being alone, they delude themselves into thinking that their partner is just going through a rough patch and that, eventually, they’ll do better. This is wrong and ends up dragging the poor woman down too.

denial willful blindess self-deceit, willful ignorance

It happens all the time. Smart and beautiful women resort to dating beneath their own standards to ensure they have a partner. Understand that they have the attitude that “anything is better than being alone.” So, they’re willing to put up with shabby treatment, spend all their hard-earned money to keep these creeps out of jail and do without just to keep a romantic partner.

I don’t know about you, but I’d rather be alone than to put up with some lazy piece of crap who does nothing but keep me stressed out and broke. I can do bad all by myself! I don’t need help from some scumbag.

I realize that life can be tough and we all get down on our luck sometimes. It happens. So, if you have a partner who’s striving and has lost their job, by no means am I suggesting that you leave because things happen that are beyond our control. And chances are that a person who really wants to do better will eventually. But if your partner doesn’t bother to try, you may want to consider other options.

If you’re in either of these types of relationships, know that you owe it to yourself to leave and to be more selective. Know that you’re worth it and if the other person can’t get their act together, you have every right to show them the door.

The last thing you should do is to waste any more time with a partner who doesn’t value you or the good you bring to their life. So, don’t settle or continue a relationship with someone who only takes you for granted. Find someone who values and cherishes you. Don’t you think you’re worth it? I do.

Later, I will post about men who date toxic partners.

Bullies Always Go After The Best of The Best

23 Comments

motivational inspirational dare to dream

Being the best- working hard, striving toward goals, and excelling at high levels all come at a high cost- a lot of resentment from others and having them try to sabotage. There’s a social penalty for high scores in work, creativity, ethics, good-heartedness- anything positive.

It’s why their peers don’t nominate the ones who are deserving of awards and accolades, nor do they recognize them for their success. They work too hard or too fast, they’re too passionate, too perfect, or excessively detailed.

Jealousy, envy, and resentment are often disguised as cold silence and ignorance, which are intentional slights from classmates, coworkers, and superiors designed to hold someone back. Peers who are secretly angered by the successes of a winner will only undermine by stealthy silence because to openly do it would be too obvious.

It would look to much like sour grapes, like the feeling of inferiority to the victor, and everyone is careful not to give off even the slightest stink that they might feel a little inferior.

Blue-collar workers often penalize those for working too fast. Classmates hate other classmates who get top scores. Peers covertly hate those who are record-breakers.

But why?

It’s because any person who breaks records unwittingly raises the bar, therefore raising teacher or management expectations for the rest, creating a new goal that’s much harder to attain.

The best of the best only threaten the rest.

It never pays to be a little too perfect in an imperfect world. You don’t score points by being a ray of light in an environment of dark souls.

The feeling that someone else is better than them are is uncomfortable and only nags at bullies until they find a way- any way possible, to level the playing field.

Many times, people perceive the best to be the worst.

Bullying and The Insanity of “Wokism”

26 Comments

So many times, I’ve heard people on the far left say things such as- “Intentions behind saying or doing something don’t matter. All that matters is that you did it or you said it and someone’s feelings were hurt. So, you should still be held accountable for hurting that person’s feelings.”

Though I understand it if you’re being bullied, and, if you are, then yes, you absolutely should be offended because bullying behavior IS intentional harm. It is something you should address quickly. However, if it’s unintentional and the person has the guts to apologize, why not accept the apology and move on?

In this major talking point, what the Radical Left is really saying is that we should be responsible for everyone else’s feelings and, therefore, handle others with kid gloves.

They’re saying that we should, in essence, walk on eggshells around other people and do it consistently.

They are saying that there’s no room for being a fallible human being, even though we all are by nature.

They’re also saying that any apology for an accidental offense won’t suffice, and that forgiveness is out of the question.

That still, you must pay a huge price regardless of your “intentions” and regardless of whether you’re remorseful for the perceived slight.

This kind of dichotomous thinking blows me away because, not only is it delusional, but downright ludicrous!

There have been times when I’ve accidentally ran into people in the supermarket on or the street, would it have made any difference if I’d run into them deliberately?

I’ve had other drivers accidentally pull out in front of me, does it mean that they did it on purpose and should be punished for it? No. Sure, it was aggravating, and, in the privacy of my car, I may have shouted, “Hey! Watch it, you idiot!” But I didn’t want to get even with the person, and I never thought that this person should be punished for it. Accidents happen. People make mistakes.

I accidentally dropped my oldest son when he was a toddler, but does that necessarily make me a terrible mother? Would it make any difference if I told you that I was sorry for it and that it scared me so bad that I took him to the ER just to make sure he was okay?

I see right through this nonsense. And one thing I know all too well is that bullies are the types who get the most offended about the tiniest and most insignificant of things. Bullies are the very people who subscribe to this kind of tripe because they’re the type who love to make any error someone makes ten times bigger than what it is. Even worse, bullies constantly search, and search high and low, for anything…anything to blow up, be offended about, nitpick, and make out to be an unforgivable sin that you should be given a death sentence for.

They will pick apart even the tiniest infraction regardless of whether it was intentional.

This is a form of bullying, in and of itself. And the “intentions-don’t-matter” bologna only serves to give bullies the excuse they’re looking for.

I spent enough years tippy toing around bullies and I’ll be damned if I ever again walk on eggshells around anyone! Sorry, Lefties. Getting your feelings hurt is a part of life and the sooner you accept it, the better off you’ll be. I no longer care even the slightest what others think of me. Most of the people who think less of me never meant much to me in the first place.

And unless you’re on the autism spectrum or you’ve suffered a traumatic brain injury (which are things that can’t be helped), you can usually tell whether an offense was intentional or unintentional because you can sense these things. You can feel the vibrations coming off the offending person. And I’ve had people, even friends, accidentally say something that hit me in my heart. But I knew that they didn’t mean anything by it. Also, they usually apologized for it. Even better, I graciously accepted their apology.

Let’s face it, sometimes words just don’t come out right and innocent actions can have adverse reactions.

Again, that’s life, and life happens.

I still get my feelings hurt from time to time, even now. Do you know what I do about it? I brush myself off and I move on. And if it’s intentional, I quickly put the person in their place with as few words as possible, then I walk away and let it go. I don’t go out of my way to get back at the person. I flat refuse to allow a few assholes to ruin my day- I won’t give them that kind of power over my life.

And the fact that people can proclaim that there isn’t a difference between intentionally and accidentally harming another person, and still manage to keep a straight face, only goes to show that they have serious mental health issues which have for too long gone unaddressed, even denied.

Wokism is, in and of itself, a mental illness. There is a purpose behind their loud trumpeting of such nonsense. And that purpose is so they can have a reason to bully others. In short, it’s all a form of mass manipulation.

We’re all human and we make unintentional mistakes, and one of those mistakes is that sometimes we say and do the wrong thing merely by accident. The Left knows this, so they spread this paranoid nonsense to justify their bullying of others, even of their own.

And if we allow ourselves to fall for their crap, we’re doomed not only as a country, but also as the human race. The truth remains that nobody is responsible for your feelings but you. If a person intentionally harms you, you have two choices, either you can give away your power by staying angry, carrying a grudge, seeking revenge on the person who offended you and making yourself even more miserable. Or you can decide just to tell them what you think, drop that person and deny them any more power over you by letting them go.

And if the person accidentally offends you, you can either accept their apology and live a happier life knowing that they realized their mistake, had the guts to admit it, and apologized, or you can choose not to accept their apology, hold grudges, and stay miserable by dragging a bunch of toxic baggage around for the rest of your life. The choice is yours.

4 Surefire Signs Someone’s Having Their Strings Pulled

3 Comments

In most cases of bullying, many targets suffer at the request of a ringleader. They may have friends and allies at first but slowly, one by one, these supporters disappear until there aren’t any left. Do you know why? It’s because the bullies have gotten to these allies and either threatened them for having something to do with the target or offered generous incentives to turn against the target.

Anytime there’s bullying, people outside the bully/target relationship will be influenced and persuaded by the bullies. Many people will instantly conform to the bullies’ way and I discussed why in the post entitled, “10 Reasons Why People Make Excuses for Bullies,” just a couple of days ago. But how do we know when someone has been influenced by bullies? How do we know when our friends have been compromised? Believe it or not, it’s easy to tell when someone is being told what to say, what not to say, and what to and not to do.

Here’s how:

1. They will be wishy-washy and flip-flop back and forth. This person will say whatever they’re told to say and that often means they must flip-flop. They say one thing, then later, say the opposite. They say whatever they think will benefit them, or what they believe will keep them out of trouble.

2. They say anything they think people want to hear. You can easily pick these people out if you listen and observe them around different types of people. Understand that folks in this category are puppets!


3. They go with the prevailing belief or narrative. If the prevailing belief or narrative (started by the bullies) is that the target is evil, crazy, a criminal, a whore, take your pick, that’s what the puppets around them will believe. And they won’t dare ask questions. They won’t care if proof to the contrary is available. They’ll only go along with whatever the word of the day is.

And understand that narratives are very flexible. They change like the weather. If you’re a target of bullying, one day you may be deemed crazy or stupid, the next day, you might be a cunning and shady con artist, and a week from now they’ll deem you an ax-murderer. You get the point.

4. They’re social chameleons. They speak and act one way around this group of people, then the exact opposite around another group of people.

Understand that these are people who can’t think for themselves. They flex and bend to anything others tell them. They’re sheep who are easily lead and persuaded.

Such people have no real personality, no backbone, and no beliefs and convictions of their own. When it comes down to it, they’re really quite pathetic and those who are true, real, and authentic (like the target), have no respect for them.

If you’re a target of bullying and you have friends who seem to turn on and off, hot and cold, because of things they hear about you and they don’t even bother to get the facts, you might want to shit-can these wimps and find better friends. Ditch and switch, baby!