‘Want to know how to go about practicing self-care when people bully you? Here are awesome ways to give yourself compassion when you’re being bullied.
If you don’t start looking out for number one, you’ll only continue coming in last! I cannot stress this enough. It’s not selfish to make yourself second to only God. Especially around bullies and people who don’t value you.
Now, don’t get me wrong. If you’re a parent raising children, or you have an ailing mother who depends on you, it’s only natural that you would put your family ahead of yourself- that’s a given. We all have an obligation to our families.
It’s also a given (or should be) that you always put God ahead of everyone else, including yourself. Again, that’s completely understandable, and more than that, it’s expected.
But when you’re in a toxic environment, around people who want to use and take you for granted, understand that you are top priority and to hell with them if they don’t like it.
Therefore, in this post you will learn the 10 ways in practicing self-care when people bully you.
Once you learn all these important tips, you’ll have the tools to show yourself compassion and feel better about yourself.
This post is all about practicing self-care when people bully you so that you can begin putting yourself first and begin to take back your peace.
Practicing Self-Care When People Bully You
Understand that when you’re being bullied in school or the workplace, the only person you have is you! Therefore, be good to yourself. How do you do this?
1. Set firm boundaries
Setting boundaries means saying no. And when you say it, say it early-on and often! Moreover, it means confidently calling out any disrespect. Then, walking away from the disrespectful drama starter without looking back. And this goes even if it’s someone you love and care about.
You have to look out for number one, because, if you don’t, no one else will. In fact, they just might use you as a rug.
So, protect your peace no matter what.
2. Keep in your mind that self-care isn’t selfish.
Self-care isn’t selfish, it’s crucial!
Many people may have conditioned you to think that putting yourself first is selfish. Those people may have called you self-centered for it. Maybe you were raised being told that self-centeredness is a huge turnoff to others. In many cases, that’s true.
Bullies and abusers also tell you this. However, they only say these things to shame you into staying around and silently taking their abuse. Therefore, you must pay attention to context and know when people are gaslighting you with this statement.
There’s a difference in practicing self-care and being self-centered.
- Self-centeredness comes with self-entitlement. It involves stepping on the rights of other people and not caring how they feel. It is the root of bullying and abuse.
- Self-care, on the other hand, means taking care of yourself without walking on others’ rights. In other words, it means that you know you’re no better than anyone else, but just as good as the next person. It means you know your rights and you’re not afraid to stand up for those rights.
You practice self-care because you hold yourself in high regard. Moreover, you treat yourself like the family member or friend that you dearly love.
It’s funny how quick bullies are to call you self-centered when you stand up to their abuse. Therefore, see it as a part of the bully’s playbook.
Therefore, if you have bullies and abusers who abuse you, always know that if they accuse you of anything- anything at all, you can bet that they are doing it themselves.
So, continue to look out for number one, even if you must find a way to do it on the sly. Don’t you think you’re worth it?
3. Practicing Self-Care When People Bully You
Self-Care May Mean Making Heartbreaking Decisions
Once you choose not to be a target anymore, you may have to make very tough decisions. You will more than likely have to weed certain people out of your life for good.
Moreover, some of those people may even be people you love very much.
You can still love them, ‘nothing wrong with it. However, as much as you may love them, they are not always healthy for you to be around.
It’s a decision many have to make with toxic family members. And it’s very excruciating for them. Why? Because, when someone has to stop talking to a family member, they miss them very much.
In fact, they mourn the person deeply. Even after all the cutting remarks, that family member may have made or the abuse they inflict, the victim still mourns them. It’s akin to having a death in the family.
There’s no pain like mourning someone who’s still alive.
However, you still must cut the person off if they continue to disrupt your peace. It’s the only way you’ll be able to heal and rebuild your life.
If you’re going through something similar, don’t lose heart. Your relationship with your estranged loved one is still repairable. Some stories do have happy endings.
There’s always a chance you’ll be closer than ever later on! Sometimes, it takes a separation to bring people closer. Although painful when it happens, walking away may actually be a great thing and produce awesome results later on.
Anytime you walk away, your value and the other person’s value often go up. Therefore, in time, you both learn to respect one another. Then you love each other even more than you did before.
4. Do the Things You Enjoy most.
The idea is to create positive experiences for yourself that will balance out the bad stuff. Doing your favorite hobbies is a great way to do that.
5. Practicing Self-Care When People Bully You:
Work toward your goals.
If you focus on your goals, you won’t have time to focus on your bullies. Besides, they don’t deserve even to be an afterthought. So, work on your goals and where you want to go.
Moreover, make life all about those things. Keep doing your thing!
6. Treat yourself.
In other words, treat yourself to a good, long soak in the bathtub, or to a makeover. Go to a spa and get a good muscle massage and pampering session.
Focus on your well-being and the more likely you are to heal from bullying.
7. take a trip.
Sometimes, it’s just good to steal away to a beach house on a secluded beach with your family or friends. Also, you can visit an out of state relative.
Whatever you decide, getting out of town helps to bring you out of stagnation and revive you. It also gives you a sense of adventure, and that always lifts the mood. So, pack your things and go!
8. Indulge in your hobbies.
Hobbies not only make you feel accomplished, but they take your mind off your bullies and the bullying you suffered in the past. Therefore, find something you enjoy doing the most and concentrate on it.
Being creative is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Moreover, it helps to remind you that you are good at something and that you have value. Which, you do!
9. Practicing self-care when People Bully You:
kick toxic people out of your life.
In other words, go no contact with anyone who uses or abuses you even a little. Why? Because the little abuses can add up to a huge punch to your self-esteem. Instead, begin keeping company with those who love you and who uplift you.
Spending time with the people who love you the most can be a buffer to your self-esteem. Why? Because it has a way of making up for all the hurt bullies cause you.
It gives you an equal or more amount of positivity in your life. Therefore, hang with those who make you feel best about yourself. Share happy times with them, laugh with them, because laughter truly is the best medicine!
10. work out and eat healthy.
Eating a good diet has ways of making you feel well. This alone can work wonders for your self-esteem. Instead of eating junk that make you feel sluggish, eat proteins and green veggies to energize you.
Also, it pays to exercise every day.
Exercise not only makes you healthier and promotes weight loss and better muscle tone, but it can also be one heck of a stress buster. Whether you like High-Intensity Training with weights or a brisk walk through the park, it increases endorphins and other feel-good chemicals to help you feel better.
Focusing on your physical health is another way to take care of yourself when people bully you.
This post is all about practicing self-Care when people bully you so that you can better protect your self-esteem and overall mental health.
Related posts you’ll enjoy:
1. Putting Yourself First: 7 Powerful Self-Care Practices
2. Bullying Support: 7 Resources You Can Reach Out to
3. How to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem
4. How to Stop Being a People Pleaser: 5 Powerful Steps
5. Bullying and Self Confidence: 7 Steps to Keeping Your Confidence Up When People Bully You
I think that is right. Sorry for my bad english. Have a nice day
Thank you so much. 💖And it’s okay. You still get your message across and that’s all that counts. 🙂 You have a nice day as well.
Yes!! 🙏🏼💗
Thank you so much! 💖
Well written covering almost everything. And yes I have found myself in similar situations. Sometimes Luck saved me sometimes I had to make an effort.
Thank you so much, Shashi. The same thing happened to me too- sometimes it was luck and sometimes I had to take care of myself. Awesome comment! 👍
Even I think self-care is very important and not a selfish as it may sound. Coz, if anyone wants to take care of someone they love, then they should take care of themselves or perfect themself (for the ones they love)…I know it sounds selfish, but is a selfless act in disguise.
I couldn’t agree more! You must take care of yourself before you can take care of others. And no, it’ not selfish. It’s selfless.
sensible advice 😇😇
Thank you so much, Jim. 🙂
🤗🤗🤗
Great post Cherie. When defending myself in the past I was led to believe it was wrong and I was shamed into shutting down once again. In the past year, I have managed to know the difference and know what I do, including my site, is all about self-are, not selfishness. I am looking after my number one, ME! Reading your posts the past few years, have rubbed off on me.
I’m so glad to hear that, Stella! You are a warrioress, dear! And you’re on your way up! <3
Making yourself number one it’s a must but you got to be careful and don’t get carried away….❤️ U.
That’s true. There’s moderation to everything! 🙂
Absolutely…thanks!
💞💞💞
Girl Cherie, not only is self-care about turning the attention to your personal needs and maintenance, it is therapeutic, regardless of the nonsense going on around you. Self-care does not have to cost an arm and a leg (and possibly a foot and an eye), but there are so many small things you can do for yourself that will mean the world of good to your mind, body, and spirit. Frequent long baths, with a cup of tea, a book, and some candles are what I call my “Calgon, take me away” moments, that I do multiple times a week. 🙏🏼🛁📖☕🕯
And yes, self-centeredness is totally different, which you explained so eloquently my friend. Wishing you a FANtabulous “self-care” day girlfriend!!! Do whatcha gotta do!!! 🛀🏼🧘🏼♀️🧎🏼♀️
Thank you so much, dahhh-ling! And you’re so right, girl! Self-care is actually very cheap financially but so valuable healthwise!
I love how you put old songs, TV shows, movies, and commercials in your comments! 😍😍😍I definitely remember the “Calgon, take me away.” commercial! 😁I also remember my mother having a box of Calgon sitting beside our bathtub and she would have her soak every night after us kids went to bed. 😁😁😁Such good memories!
Girlfriend thank you so much. I am so glad you can relate. Sometimes I feel old saying these catchphrases from the past! LOL 😜😆🤣 Geez! But your topic on self-care took me back to that place in time. At least 4 days of the week, I bask in the essence of my bath, a loooonnnnnggggggg bath, although it’s not with Calgon!!! LMBO 🤭😱🛁
I hear you, my fellow DeeJay! And sometimes I feel old too with the old phrases and commercial quotes. But I sure like a good soak in the tub! Calgon may be a thing of the past but I have bath bombs! And I keep plenty of them in my bathroom closet! Don’t you just love to watch a bath bomb fizz when you drop it in the water??? 🛀🪥🧼
Girl those bath bombs are the bomb!!! 💣 Honey, when they start to fizz, you know you are in for an adventure! I am always gamed!!! Hahahaha 🛁💖🛀🏽
You know it, honey! There’s nothing like a good soak, but bath bombs are like icing on the cake! An extra treat to give your bath that extra kick! I’m a bath bomb girl through and through!
It’s all about the bass, the bath, the bomb, the bass (uh-oh, channeling my Meghan Trainor)! 😲🎶🥁😎🎼🎤🎸😁 https://youtu.be/7PCkvCPvDXk
“I’m all about that bass, bout that bass, no treble!” Girl! I love the size confidence in this girl! Woo-hoo! Now that’s how ya work it!
Oh yes girlfriend! Slam, bam, thank you ma’am!!! 🎼🎤🎶
😂🤣😂🤣 You betcha!
Very nice article again! Love this quote — “When you’re not used to confidence, confidence feels like arrogance. When you’re used to being passive, assertiveness feels like aggression. When you’re not used to getting your needs met, prioritizing yourself feels selfish. Your comfort zone is not a good benchmark.” ~ Dr. Vassilia
https://themindsjournal.com/when-youre-not-used-to-being-confident-confidence-feels-like-arrogance/
❤💀
Thank you so much! 💖 I’ll definitely check out the link.
Its a really good text.
I think you have absolutle right.
If everyone think on this way, World will be better.
Thank you!
Good day
Krzysiek
You’re most welcome, Krzysiek! And thank you so much for your insightful comment! Welcome to the Chateau! 😊
One way I handled the bullying was to escape into my own little fantasy world. It did take a lot of stress away. Great advice as always Cherie.
Thank you so much, Michael! Much appreciated!