When a target encounters bullies and their unacceptable behavior, he/she often feels dehumanized. They also feel canceled- erased- blotted out! To the bullies, the target’s feelings don’t matter because the target isn’t human to them. Understand that once the target is successfully dehumanized, it becomes much easier for bullies and others to brutalize them.
To the bullies, the target shouldn’t exist. And trying to defend themselves against the brutality only leaves the target exhausted and run down. He/she also goes through severe mental anguish and intense emotional pain. Fear grips the target like a vice because there’s always a risk of a brutal physical assault.
Understand that bullies don’t want to hear or understand the target. They only want to hurt him/her and control their life- every aspect of it. All bullying behavior, whether subtle (such as a micro flash of contempt), or obvious (such as a fit of rage heavily sprinkled with horrible names and expletives) only attempts to harm and control.
It doesn’t matter if the behavior is ridiculous and complete nonsense. When bullies have an outburst, they don’t see themselves as being ridiculous and irrational, even if others do. They see themselves as justified and right and the target deserving of persecution and being controlled.
With that said, I want you to see it for what it is- an attempt by the bullies to control, dominate, and harm. It’s an effort to take away your power, autonomy, freedom, and happiness.
And once you see this, it’s imperative that you walk away from these people and not give them one nanosecond of your time. You must do what you have to do to keep yourself safe. As far as you’re concerned, they are dead to you.
With knowledge comes empowerment!
OMG Cherie, this nails it:
“It doesn’t matter if the behavior is ridiculous and complete nonsense. When bullies have an outburst, they don’t see themselves as being ridiculous and irrational, even if others do.”
Girlfriend, you were spot on with that. 🎯💯😡 It’s like an out-of-control wild animal that you’re trying to tame. UGH! 😱 Sometimes you want to haul off and knock ’em up side their heads to try to knock some sense into them, but that might only make them even more irrational, ridiculous, and act like a highly crazed maniac. 😠 Unreal!
Thank you so much, Kym! “It’s like an out-of-control animal that you’re trying to tame.” Kym, that’s such a perfect explanation of it! You couldn’t have described it with a better analogy! I love your thoughts on this!
Oh girlfriend, I think we all are following your lead, because we know such attitudes all too well. 😫 It simply baffles me how these folks don’t see themselves when, or if they look in the mirror! 😲 Thanks so much for sharing your perspective on this mind-boggling pattern of behavior! 💯👀🎯
Aww, thank you so much! 💖💐🌹 It baffles me too, girl. But if you notice, narcs are always on the defensive because they’re so afraid of being pinpointed. They react the way they do to protect their shaky sense of self and their fragile egos. 🤣😂🤣😂
Oh girl….booyah! 💯🤜🏽🤛🏽🎯👏🏼🤨🎤
😊🤗😊🤗