How to Recover from Bullying: The 1 Thing You Must Do

December 12, 2025December 11, 20252 Comments

‘Want to know how to recover from bullying? Here’s the one thing you must do if you expect to recover from and overcome bullying.

To recover from bullying takes time and effort. Therefore, in this post, you will learn how to recover from bullying and reclaim your power and your life.

Once you learn this one crucial step, you will overcome bullying so much faster.

This post is all about how to recover from bullying so that you can move on to a better and more rewarding life.

How to Recover from Bullying

This may make you angry because it did me when someone gave me this advice years ago.

Moreover, you may think that I’m an idiot for what I’m about to say. However, when I finally did it, it worked for me. Therefore, here is the ONE thing you must do to recover.

You must forgive your bullies.

Ouch! I know this is not what you expected to read. However, know that forgiveness doesn’t mean that you have to be buddy-buddy with them.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean foolishness

Healthy forgiveness doesn’t mean that what they did to you was okay. What it means is that you refuse to let those who transgressed against you set up camp in your mind.

It means that you refuse to hold onto grudges that may block you from your rightful blessings. In this, you make room for growth and success.

Sadly, too many people think that forgiveness means that you must play nice. They then wonder why they keep getting hurt.

Realize that bullies only see forgiveness as a weakness and stupidity. They view forgiveness as a green light to continue their abuse. Why? Because they assume you’ll always be okay with it.

Forgiveness doesn’t obligate you to interact with bullies. It doesn’t mean you continue to be someone’s fool. You can forgive someone and still realize that they’re no good.

Toxic people are dead weight, and though you may forgive them, you realize that it’s still best to keep them at arm’s length.

How to Recover from Bullying:

You’re strong enough to forgive but wise enough to avoid toxic people.

You avoid them because you realize that these people will only take your forgiveness for foolishness. Because these people have a history of pushing your boundaries, you’re forgiving yet assertive.

Forgiveness is great because it gives you peace of mind. However, if you continue to allow these people to have a place in your life, they’ll continue to take advantage of you.

You don’t have to be mean to or mistreat them. However, no law says you have to trust them again. In fact, you shouldn’t trust them.

Some people you must forgive from afar.

The Importance of Forgiveness

Forgiving your bullies and anyone who’s ever wronged you isn’t easy. However, it’s the most important thing you can do for yourself.

I know, I know! I can practically hear the groans of dread and scoffs coming from a few already. To be honest, I once had the same attitude myself anytime someone advised me to forgive.

I wasn’t ready to because I hadn’t healed yet.

How to Recover from bullying:

You must heal before you can forgive

Sometimes, you need time to process the abuse you suffered and heal before you can forgive. I understand because I’ve been there. And only you can know when you’re ready.

Again, forgiveness doesn’t mean that the transgression they committed against you is okay. And, it does not mean that you have to buddy up with the person who wronged you.

But when you’re ready to forgive, it will only benefit you, not your attacker.

It took me several years to forgive my classmates. It was why I didn’t go to the ten or twenty-year class reunion. I had no desire to see their faces. I was just damn glad they were out of my life.

As long as I stayed away from my former schoolmates and they stayed away from me, I was happy. But when I’d see one of them on the street, I’d turn and walk away without giving them so much as a “hi” or “kiss my ass.”

To heal and forgive, you must allow yourself to feel the emotions.

When you’ve been a target of bullies, it’s only natural to feel anger, resentment, and disgust. To heal, we must allow ourselves to go through the pain and raw emotions.

Never bury the pain. Never keep it stuffed down inside because you’re afraid to make anyone angry or uncomfortable. Why? Because it will only fester if you do.

You will internalize everything you’ve been through, which is the worst thing you can do. It will come out sooner or later in a very destructive rage or physical illness, such as a heart attack.

How to Recover from Bullying:

It’s okay to feel sad. Just don’t dwell on it.

Take your time and feel your emotions as long as you need to. Go somewhere private and cry if you need to. Crying doesn’t mean that you’re weak. It means that you’re a human being.

Please do whatever you need to do to get it off your chest. The sooner you process those bad feelings, the sooner you can forgive and move on to a better life.

Just don’t stay in that dark place for long. Don’t set up your tent and live there!

Be open about your anger and talk to a friend, family member, or therapist. Tell them you’re pissed. Speak out about the abuse. But get it out! And realize there will be those who won’t like it.

Understand that, in this world, some people won’t mind wiping their feet all over you. However, they will be greatly offended when you become angry about it and speak out.

There will be those who expect you to be okay with something they know good and well they wouldn’t be OK with if it were done to them. But tell those people to get lost because they don’t matter. What matters is that you care for yourself and put yourself first.

It’s okay to speak up and defend yourself.

Why should you give a ticker’s damn about their feelings? They never gave a damn about yours. So, never let those ignoramuses make you feel guilty for speaking out and responding in kind!

Tell them what you think and let it out. But do it constructively. Put some bass in your voice. Be firm, but don’t yell. A certain amount of cursing is expected when you’re pushed too far.

But don’t drop any F-bombs. Raise your voice if you need to, but don’t scream and yell. Screaming and yelling will only incite toxic bullies to push your buttons to see you react. Then they will tell anyone who’ll listen that you’re “mentally unstable.”

I’m glad to say that I eventually healed and forgave them. Doing this felt like a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. And when I forgave, I found a peace I hadn’t known in years.

I was able to move on through reading, researching, and writing about bullying. But first, I had to heal!

How to Recover from Bullying:

Forgiveness is the prerequisite for re-empowerment.

This bears repeating. It’s not about letting anyone off the hook. It’s about setting yourself free from toxic emotions that hold you back.

This message is for targets of bullying today and for survivors. Forgive them when you’re ready. I can tell you that for me, there’s truly no better feeling!

Let go of grudges.

Anytime you hold on to grudges, that individual controls you. They may have exerted control over the years they bullied you. But you don’t have to let them control the rest of your life.

Let me put it another way, holding onto anger doesn’t hurt the person it’s aimed at. It hurts you. Why? Because the people you have grudges against either don’t know about it, or they don’t care.

While you’re sitting around stewing over someone who did you wrong, that person couldn’t care less. They’re going on with their lives and not giving you a thought. So, why should you allow them to take up space in your mind?

Forgiveness is the only solution. It’s the only way that you will be able to take back control of your life.

If you want to be happy, successful, and live in peace, forgive those who wronged you. It’s the only way!

How to Recover from Bullying:

Never allow Yourself to Hate Your Bullies

Sadly, hate is too easy for bullying targets to get sucked into. When others have treated you so horrifically for long enough, you lose faith in humanity.

A person who is the object of bullying begins to believe that all people are self-serving and enjoy seeing others suffer. They soon become the very ones they’re suspicious of. I’ve been there.

Targets of bullying often think that there is justification for their hate. However, does this intense loathing serve any purpose or have benefits? No!

No matter how some creep may have wronged you, never give in to hate. Because it is poisonous! Not to the other person but to YOU!

Here’s Why:

It burns you up inside. It eats down into your very soul and prolongs feelings of hurt, depression, and downright misery.
Again, it doesn’t hurt your enemy. It hurts you because nine times out of ten, the person you hate either doesn’t know about it or doesn’t care.
You give up your blessings. Also, you forego any opportunities that would otherwise come your way. You invite negativity and evil into your world instead. Hatred causes you to forego your own happiness, and life is too short to be anything but happy.
Again, while you are sitting around stewing over some idiot who has wronged you in the past, they aren’t thinking about you.
It can destroy your happiness and prospects.
It skews your judgment and ability to think clearly.
It causes you to make horrible decisions- decisions that can alter the entire trajectory of your life.
It numbs your conscience and dulls your reasoning capabilities.
You will condone things that you would otherwise deem immoral and evil.
You will approve of the most depraved, heinous, and atrocious atrocities directed toward the one you hate. Yet you will condemn it if it’s against anyone else, even a total stranger.
It prevents you from recovering.
It is a sick and twisted obsession, and it can take over your life if you allow it to.

As a result, you will never recover from bullying.

It Serves No Purpose

While you are holding grudges and plotting ways to get back at them, that person is getting on with life. The person who hurt you doesn’t care about you.

They are not thinking about you. So why do you allow them to live rent-free in your head? They are a complete waste of brain activity!

Hate, insecurity, grudges, and excessive anger are all garbage in your life. And they need to be disposed of.

It’s time to take out the trash and take back the peace and happiness that you not only deserve but have a divine right to.

You deserve to be happy. And the only way you will find happiness is to let go of any grudges and hate and replace them with love and acceptance. It is what I had to do before I could recover from bullying and finally be happy again.

How to Recover from Bullying:

What hate does to the hater

It eats the hater’s soul out from the inside. Their minds are so consumed that all they can focus on is ways to harm the object of their hatred.

It causes them to give a pass to things they would otherwise deem the most depraved and heinous. That is, as long as they’re done to the person they despise.

Hate can turn the kindest humans into the vilest monsters. If it’s someone they loathe who is being abused, they will stand by and watch it happen with smiles on their faces.

If you’re bullied and the object of animosity, your bullies have a sick and twisted obsession with you. They can’t get you out of their minds, and they want to hurt you as much as they possibly can.

Yes! You read that correctly. Hate is an obsession. And it won’t destroy you alone. It will ruin your bullies, too.

You can choose to let your haters get to you or not.

You have the delicious power to re-frame your thinking and see their hatred for what it is. It comes from something inside them; it has nothing to do with you.

They are only poisoning themselves with it. So, sit back, eat your popcorn, and watch them eat their hearts out and self-destruct.

As a survivor of severe bullying and peer-abuse, I’ve seen the faces of hate- up close and personal. And let me tell you, it’s ugly! And dangerous!

I’ve looked into the eyes of my bullies- deep into their eyes- down into their souls! And I genuinely believe that if there weren’t a law against murder, I wouldn’t be here today.

I know what it looks like. I’ve felt its powerful and painful sting and been paralyzed by it. As much as I don’t like to admit it, I even directed it toward others in those days.

But I’ve also learned that there’s dignity in being hated.

How to Recover from Bullying:

Indifference is Much Better than Hate

Indifference is better. Why? Because with indifference, you couldn’t care less. You couldn’t care less if the person is doing good or bad, what he thinks, what he says, or what he does.

On the other hand, with the former, you care because you want the despised person to suffer. There’s a strong desire to ensure nothing good happens to the other person.

And you obsessively seek to destroy them and their life. You want to make sure all opportunities are closed off to them. This is what animosity does. It causes you to obsess over the hated.

So, if you’re a target of bullies, let them go ahead and hate on you. But don’t return the animosity. When you refuse to despise those who wronged you, you recover from bullying so much faster.

Instead, be indifferent toward them; do that by stopping your thoughts about them. Stop caring what others think. Forgive them. Recover. Then move on and do your thing, baby!

How to Recover from bullying:

Summary:

To recover from bullying, you must forgive your bullies.
Forgiveness isn’t letting anyone off the hook; it’s setting yourself free.
Get rid of any hatred because it will only rot you out from the inside and hinder recovery.
Realize that there is dignity in being despised. So, don’t give your bullies the dignity they don’t deserve. On the same token, if you are the object of hatred, smile. Because your enemy is giving you dignity without realizing it.
Through forgiveness, you recover from bullying much faster.

This post showed you how to recover from bullying so that you can move on to peace and happiness.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Healing from Bullying: 11 Amazing Recovery Tips

2. Recovery from Bullying: Journey to Healing

3. The Importance of Forgiveness

4. Forgiveness Does Not Require Reconnection

Survivors of Bullying: How It Feels to Overome

July 14, 2025July 14, 20257 Comments

‘Want to know about the resilience of survivors of bullying? If you’re one of them, this post should make you feel proud that you not only survived, but you overcame!

The survivor of bullying who escapes the abuse first comes out with shock, anger, and sadness. But once the healing is underway, they’re filled with renewed hope.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn about the resilience and strength of survivors of bullying and why you should be proud of overcoming bullying and regaining your happiness and peace of mind.

Once you learn about what it means to overcome bullying, you will feel nothing short of victorious.

This post is all about survivors of bullying and what it feels like to finally rise above bullying and feel that renewed confidence that those like me feel to give you hope if you’re currently being bullied.

Survivors of Bullying

When school or workplace bullying experiences have exposed you to the darkest sides of human nature, you have a stronger sense of your own endurance and capability. This is all because of what you have endured and were able to overcome.

You never know your own strength until you’ve overcome bullying, especially severe and chronic bullying and mobbing.

They have an enhanced ability to read people and their intentions.

Another takeaway is that the survivor has a stronger sense of people. They can smell fakery and BS from a mile away. Additionally, they can identify bullies before even speaking to them.

The survivor pays closer attention to how people carry themselves. They also notice their body language and the vibes and energy others emit.

As a result, they are better able to avoid people who might want to harm them. Why? Because they’ve learned the hard way the importance of listening to their gut instinct and heeding it.

Anytime something is even the slightest bit “off” about a person, they notice right away. The survivor of bullying has learned that it’s essential to trust himself. Additionally, they realize that it’s equally important to trust his feelings and judgment.

Survivors of Bullying make it a point not to follow the crowd.

On the other side of bullying, a survivor learns and develops the determination never to conform to the standards of others. They live life on their terms because they know what it’s like to be a slave to the approval of others.

In other words, they know what it’s like to be a prisoner to outside influences. And they see the powerlessness of having one’s pleasure depend on the permission of others.

They know what it’s like when others force them to apologize for simply being who they are. And they aren’t having any of it!

They know that following the crowd will only suppress who they are. Therefore, they refuse to lose themselves in the crowd! They’ve learned this the hard way.

They know their worth.

Overcoming past abuse gives the survivor a restored and refined sense of their worth. In other words, they gain insight into the immense value they bring to the world.

He awakens to his goodness and realizes that yes! They are worthy of love, friendship, affection, and all the best things in life.

He also realizes that there are people who love him and there always have been, no matter what those vile bullies told him. The survivor of bullying ends up with a much clearer vision of what she will not tolerate or settle for.

She is unmovable in her refusal to kiss butt or bow down to anyone no matter what the cost may be. She’s wasted enough years living on her knees. And if others are going to punish her for her unwillingness to kowtow, she’ll suffer those consequences standing up.

Survivors of Bullying stand up for other victims.

The survivor of bullying is also a fierce warrior for other victims. If he sees another person being bullied, he will stand up for that person. He will go toe-to-toe with the bullies to protect the target.

And they will fight for that victim, then take them under their wing. They will also teach them how to defend themself.

They know what it’s like to take crap off of people. Therefore, they bestow onto other victims what they’ve endured and what they’ve learned from it.

They make it a point to set boundaries and enforce them if they must.

The survivor who has overcome bullying isn’t afraid to say no. And they aren’t too scared to walk away from any relationship that doesn’t fulfill them.

Additionally, they aren’t afraid to call out bad behavior. They will stand up to anyone who tries to abuse them. Predatory people may try to bully them, but they’ll only do it once.

They’ve been through that bullshit before and they aren’t about to endure it a second time.

Survivors of Bullying are selective of the people they allow to come around them.

They automatically gravitate toward relationships that nourish them. Moreover, survivors of bullying keep their circles small. This is because they choose the quality of friends over quantity.

In other words, they’re highly selective of who they allow into their lives. If they ever find out that someone they thought was a friend is betraying them, they aren’t afraid to cut that person off.

Moreover, they aren’t afraid of being alone and friendless for a while. The survivor of bullying knows that they can always make new friends. And they would much rather be by themselves than tolerate those who only pretend to be their friends.

Loyalty is a characteristic that survivors look for in potential friendships. And once you break their trust, they rarely give second chances.

If they do, they make you work like a dog to prove yourself worthy of their friendship.

They refuse to stay in toxic places.

Survivors of bullying refuse to stay in any environment that doesn’t allow them to grow and flourish. They avoid toxic environments like the plague.

For example, if a survivor of bullying works in a toxic work environment. They won’t stay there long. They’ll quickly and quietly search for employment with a healthier company, then submit a letter of resignation.

Survivors of Bullying don’t settle for anything less than what they want.

The survivor realizes what she deserves and goes after it with resilience and tenacity. Life’s given her enough of what she doesn’t want. And now, the time has come for her to claim what she knows she deserves and has a right to.

The survivor realizes, probably more than anyone, that life is short. And you only get one shot in this world. Therefore, they work diligently to create the life they know they deserve. And they do it without guilt.

The survivor knows that she’s neither entitled nor privileged. She realizes that the big, bad world owes her nothing. And that’s okay. She’s willing to work for what she wants.

They are self-reliant.

Survivors of bullying are fiercely independent. They realize that there’s no such thing as a free ride. Why? Because, damn! No one ever gave them anything but hell.

What they understand more than anything is that all you have is you. The only person you can depend on is you.

So, they know that reaching their goals and dreams is up to them and them alone. And they work toward those goals with fervor.

Survivors of bullying never take their friends and loved ones for granted.

The survivor of bullying makes it a point never to take anyone for granted. They let their family and friends know they love and value them. Why? Because they know what it is like to be alone, unwanted, and abused.

And they would never want anyone, especially the people they care about, to feel that way or endure what they have.

They see the people who love them as blessings, and they appreciate them.

They are grateful for everything positive in their lives.

The survivor of bullying savors every wonderful moment, every positive encounter, and every happy event because he has seen enough negativity.

What the survivor enjoys more than anything else is wonderful relationships. Why? Because they were relationships they never had when people were bullying them.

Survivors of bullying are also thankful for every happy moment they are blessed with. Moreover, they create more of them.

They enjoy helping others who go through what they once endured. And they use their experiences to encourage them and give them hope. This also creates positive rewards for them.

In Closing

Bullying can be traumatic. But sometimes, others must tear you down before you can build yourself back up again. Sometimes, fake friends must abandon you now before you can truly appreciate the family and friendships you have later.

And sometimes, it takes having others deny you approval and validation before you can enjoy the freedom of self-love. When you finally regard others’ opinions with indifference, you set yourself free.

When you learn to discard the opinions of those who don’t matter and, perhaps, never should have mattered, your self-esteem skyrockets and you take back your power and live life on your terms.

Surviving and overcoming bullying gives you a renewed sense of your value, independence, and overall freedom. It changes everything! And for the better! And, if you’re an adult survivor of school bullying, congratulations! You’re getting an earlier start!

And there’s nothing that tastes sweeter than that!

Therefore, never be ashamed of having been bullied. Be proud that you overcame it!

This post was all about survivors of bullying so that, if you survived bullying and overcame, you can feel good about that!

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Adult Survivors of School Bullying: 19 Things They Do Differently

2. Bullying and Trauma

3. How to Overcome Low Self-Esteem: 7 Easy Ways