Category: self-esteem

Confident Body Language: 11 Ways to Look Confident

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‘Want to know all about confident body language and all the ways you can look confident even if you don’t necessarily feel confident? Here are all the tips and tricks you need to know about.

confident body language

Confidence looks great on anybody! Even you! Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about confident body language and ways to look like you just won a million bucks!

Once you learn all about this life-changing information, you will not only look but feel better! Moreover, your magnetism will skyrocket!

This post is all about confident body language and ways to look confident so that you not only give your self-esteem a boost but your charisma too. And the best part is that you’ll less likely look like bully-bait!

Confident Body Language

The look of confidence can be the difference between being badass or being bullied. But before we talk about body language that make you look confident, let’s talk about the body language you should avoid.

5 Body Language Mistakes You Should Avoid

Bullies are always on the hunt for targets. Therefore, they look for signs in a potential target that screams “victim.” But, how do they do this?

Bullies will study your body language first and foremost. They also notice your emotional reactions to certain things.

In other words, they watch how you handle conflict and adversity. Here are all the negative body language moves and ways to correct them.

1. Lack of Eye-contact (Looking down or away)

Lack of eye-contact signals either dishonesty, or a lack of confidence. This is exactly what bullies look for.

Many victims of bullying get nervous in social situations. This is understandable.

When people have bullied you for long enough, you no longer feel safe in social interactions. Therefore, you’ll often avoid them altogether.

A little nervousness is normal. However, when you’re nervous to the point of avoiding eye-contact with others, bullies may notice.

As a result, they’ll peg you as a victim. Also, even people who aren’t necessarily bullies may mistake you for being deceptive.

Therefore, the best thing to do is to relax and look others in the eye when socializing. Realize that not everything is about you.

Make the interaction about the other person or people in the conversation. Smile. Act confident.

Yes, acting confident may seem fake. However, personal experience has taught me that if you act confident, you will soon feel confident.

And confidence is the best way to get through any social situation. Also, it lessens your chances of attracting bullies.

2. What isn’t Confident Body Language:

submissive body language

This includes poor posture, such as slouching and hunching down. Also, people-pleasing is another form of submission.

Behaviors such as shying away from saying what you want to say and not seeking to achieve your needs are forms of people-pleasing.

You must stop this behavior right now. Begin standing and sitting up straight. Stop trying to please other people. Instead, start achieving your own needs for a change.

Remember that you deserve, just as much as the next person, to have your needs and wants met. Therefore, start working toward your own goals. And to hell with the rest of them if they don’t like it.

3. self-protective behaviors (closed body-language)

Crossing of the arms in front of you and crossing your legs are both self-protective behaviors. So are hunkering down into the shoulders and hiding the neck.

Bullies will instantly notice this behavior from a mile away and think, “fresh meat!” when they see it.

Instead, open up and allow yourself to take up some space. Lengthen your neck and hold your head high. Relax. Always relax!

4. What isn’t Confident Body Language:

Having a Sheepish Look On Your Face

That includes downcast eyes, holding your head down, and looking bashful. Again, hold your head high.

Look people in the eye and smile. I guarantee you they will appreciate it when you do and think more highly of you.

5. trying to stay motionless to avoid drawing attention

This almost always gets you opposite results. Staying motionless won’t keep you from drawing attention. It just might get you the wrong attention- from bullies.

Therefore, you must move freely and I’m going to say it again… relax!

You must watch your body language if you don’t want bullies to spot you as a potential target. In fact, it’s the most important thing you can do.

If you catch yourself looking down, correct this by looking people in the eye or looking ahead. If it’s slouching you find yourself doing, sit up straight.

And keep doing this until it becomes second nature, no matter how long it takes. Why? Because body language speaks louder than words ever will.

Moreover, not only should you mind your own body language, you should also watch the bullies’ nonverbal cues as well.

11 Confident Body Language Cues

Close to ninety percent of our language is nonverbal. All too often, when bullies have attacked you for an extended period, your self-esteem and mental health suffer.

Even worse, people will see it in your everyday body language. You won’t realize it’s happening.

Consequently, most targets only attract more bullies and bullying. Why? Because their body language changes with time as they endure daily abuse.

In other words, the victim’s body language will transform from confident to diffident– meaning lack of confidence. This is the reason most victims have very few friends.

Why do most targets of bullying have difficulty making friends?

This is because, others can spot insecurity a mile away. And it makes it difficult to attract healthy people into your life.

You’ll only attract users and more abusers. Why? Because, human nature dictates that healthy people stay away from those who have low self-esteem.

If you aren’t confident, you’ll attract predators. And these people will only pretend to be your friends to exert control over your life and get something from you.

Moreover, nonverbal signals, such as lack of eye contact, looking down, fake smiles and closed body language make you appear unapproachable.

Confident Body Language:

It’s not your fault.

Naturally, this is not your fault. It is just something that happens after you’ve endured abuse for so long. However, here’s the good news!

Confident body language is something that you can learn. Moreover, it’s something you can teach yourself and practice.

And once you perfect it, you will instantly attract faithful friends and better people into your life. Also, you’ll begin to repel bullies and other human predators.

Here are 11 powerful tricks you can use to Look Confident and instantly win friends.

1. Smile! And smile genuinely!

Smiling at people shows that you approve of them. Also, it shows that you’re open to friendships.

Moreover, it conveys confidence and confidence is where it’s at! On the other hand, a fake smile is easy to spot and a major turn-off.

It only repels people and invites more bullying. Fake smiles only hurt more than they help.

2. Make good eye contact.

When you make good eye contact, you show others that you are genuinely interested in them. It also shows respect.

People love those who take an interest in them. Therefore, when you’re engaged in conversation with someone, look them in the eye.

Just don’t overdo it or you’ll seem creepy. Just find that happy middle.

3. Confident Body Language:

Stand up straight.

Bad posture, such as slouching and hunching, only conveys insecurity and low self-esteem. So, stand up straight and walk with purpose.

Also, throw in a few power poses when you stand. Feet should be shoulder-width apart, with your hands on your hips with your thumbs on the front of your waist.

This also signals confidence. Again, confidence keeps bullies away. When a bully sees someone do this, they think twice before messing with the person. Why? Because their body language is signaling confidence and, more importantly, power!

And if there’s one thing bullies understand, it is power!

4. Practice open body language.

This will instantly make you more approachable. Put simpler, open body language means facing the people you talk to and keeping your whole body turned toward the person you’re speaking to.

Also, look them in the eye when. When you do all this combined, you’re signaling that you’re interested in what the other person has to say.

5. Slightly lean in when you talk to someone.

Again, this shows that you are fully engaged and interested in what the other person is saying. However, only do it slightly to avoid invading your interlocutor’s personal space.

Make sure to do this properly and you will build rapport with the people you speak to. Also, they will be more likely to trust you.

6. Confident Body Language:

Nod when you agree with the person you’re talking to.

Nodding not only shows that you are listening and fully engaged. Also, it conveys understanding and agreement.

Therefore, it’s a very powerful form of communication and often gets amazing social results!

7. Use hand gestures when you speak.

Using hand gestures can help you to think and express your thoughts and feelings more clearly. Moreover, it conveys understanding, energy and warmness.

8. Relax.

If you want people to feel at ease around you, relax when you’re having a conversation with them. There is nothing worse than talking to someone who seems nervous and tense.

Not only does it weird people out, it sends the message that you might be trying to hide something!

Therefore, always relax around others. Having relaxed body language conveys that you’re comfortable and confident with yourself.

Moreover, it shows that you’re confident about them too. It signals trust. Therefore, others will be comfortable and confident with you.

9. Confident Body Language:

Hold your head up.

Holding your head down or looking down conveys low self-esteem and lack of confidence. Therefore, always hold your head high. Doing this says confidence and others notice.

Look like you feel good about yourself and your attitude will soon align with it.

10. Be aware of where your toes are pointed.

If you’re in a conversation with someone and your toes aren’t pointed toward them, it only conveys that you want to go elsewhere. In other words, it says that you don’t want to be with the person.

Now, some people don’t think about the feet. However, those who are the most aware of body language cues will.

Therefore, always stand with your feet and toes pointed toward the person you’re talking to. It signals that you want to move toward them – that you’re happy to see them and speak with them.

11. Make sure your body language is congruent with your words.

This is so important! If you’re saying one thing and your body language doesn’t match, you will come off to others as insincere.

As a result, they won’t take you seriously and will be repelled by you. Nobody likes fake. So, more than anything else, be sure that your nonverbal cues are in line with your verbal ones.

This post was all about confident body language so that you can not only keep bullies away but attract healthy people and friendships.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Bullying and Self Confidence: 7 Steps to Keeping Your Confidence Up When People Bully You

2. Confidence vs Arrogance

3. How to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem

facts about respect for yourself and others

Facts About Respect: 9 Time-Tested Truths You Must Know

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Do you want to know the facts about respect and the purpose of it? Here are the nine truths of respect that you need to know.

facts about respect

Today, people, especially bullies, seem to think that they’re entitled to respect they never earn. Moreover, victims of bullying have a self-depreciating habit of giving respect to those who don’t return it.

As someone who’s been on both sides of the fence, I’m giving you truths about respect that I had to learn the hard way.

You will learn all the facts about respect and what they mean.

Once you learn all these truths, you will be more selective with who you give respect to and who to withhold it from. Also, you will know more about how to gain respect so that you can live in peace and harmony and get along better with others.

This post gives the facts about respect that every target of bullying must know about.

Facts About Respect

It’s true that we should remain humble. However, sadly, most people these days think that they’re entitled to respect simply because they exist. This especially describes those with even a little bit of power.

However, at the end of the day, no one is any better or more important than the next person. Having a degree of humility is a virtue. Why? Because we all have weaknesses, imperfections, and shortcomings.

Everyone, no matter how great, has limitations and must know what their limitations are.

Therefore, you must respect the people who respect you. On the other hand, you must also respect yourself enough to walk away from those who disrespect you.

You Must Respect yourself also.

Self-respect– it sounds good. It’s so pleasing to the ears.

However, it’s difficult to master and sometimes takes a lifetime to develop, especially if you’ve ever been a target of bullying and abuse.

When people bully, abuse, and gaslight you, it can often compel you to seek approval. Consequently, you might do some pretty drastic things to get that approval.

Sadly, many people never master self-respect because they’re under the presumption that life’s all about having a truckload of friends. Moreover, they may be obsessed with having huge wads of cash or getting all the girls.

Bullies are all about having power. Moreover, they believe that life’s all about being popular, or pretty. They aren’t satisfied unless they can be the king of the mountain, or the baddest mother on the block.

These are the bullies- the people who are constantly trying to prove themselves to others. That’s not self-respect.

Facts about respect and about Self-Respect

When you have self-respect, none of the superficial stuff interests you. Therefore, you don’t feel the need to perform cartwheels and showboat.

You feel good about yourself and there’s no need to prove your worth to the rest of the world. Why? Because you could care less what anyone else thinks.

Self-respect means treating yourself like you want others to treat you. Moreover, how well you treat yourself is determined by how you allow others to behave toward you.

You choose what you will and will not accept. Therefore, it means not settling for anything less than what you know you want and deserve.

Self-respect means taking care of yourself, mind, body, and spirit.

It means knowing who you are, what you want, what heights you’re capable of. Moreover, it means believing in yourself and never doubting what you can achieve.

In other words, it means refusing to allow bullies and abusers to convince you that you should hate yourself. Also, it means refusing the desperation to please, appease, and impress others and knowing that the only Person you should seek approval from is God Himself.

Self-respect means knowing your worth. In other words, you know the value you bring to the lives of others. Moreover, that belief stands regardless of what a few toxic people may think or say.

You continue to stay true to your values, beliefs, and convictions, whether or not they’re popular.

It means accepting and embracing everything that is you. This includes your age, sex, race, nationality, creed, body composition, weight, height, looks, quirks, and idiosyncrasies.

Facts About Respect:

What happens when you give respect to those who haven’t earned it from you?

Never respect anyone who doesn’t respect you back. Why? Because when you do, it’s not self-respect. What it is, is self-abuse.

Anytime you give unearned respect, it only reeks of desperation. In other words, when you give respect to people who don’t respect you,  you allow yourself to be a slave, a prisoner, a whipping boy.

To put it bluntly, you make yourself somebody’s bitch. You put your value, and sometimes, your life, in someone else’s hands.

Never take the respect others give you for granted.

Whereas, never take the respect you get from others for granted. Again, respect isn’t something you’re entitled to. It’s not automatic, and to think you’re owed such a commodity without earning it is arrogance. It means you’re a pompous, self-serving turd who’s full of yourself.

Bullies are people who demand respect but have none for anyone else. Therefore, here is what they fail to realize:

People may act like they respect them to their faces. However, once the bullies are away and out of earshot, people will gather and talk mad trash about them behind their backs. T

Others will know the truth. That the bullies are only self-satisfied pieces of crap who think they’re entitled. And people will call them exactly what they are and laugh at them in secret.

Here are the 9 facts about bullying you must know.

1.Respect is earned, not freely given.

Respect is not an entitlement! No! it is something you must give to get. Understand that everyone has a space to fill, even you.

Moreover, it is either mutual or none at all and there’s no in-between. Respect is a two-way street. Always!

2. Like love, respect is something money can’t buy.

It doesn’t matter how much money, power, and prestige you have. If you’re a piece of scum, you’re a piece of scum.

Besides, your money is something you can never take with you when you go. Neither can you take your power nor your prestige.

We all come into this world naked and so shall we leave it.

3. Facts about respect:

You cannot demand it nor get it through bullying and instilling fear in others.

Only gangs and mobsters demand respect- all while giving none in return. These people steal, kill, and destroy the lives of others, then have the chutzpah to demand respect from the very people they harm.

However, as mentioned earlier, people don’t respect them. They only act like they do. And believe me, they will talk smack once the bullies turn their backs.

4. Respect is something you must sometimes stand up and fight for.

There are toxic people everywhere- users, abusers, bullies. In other words, people who think they’re superior and that you’re their personal property.

Those who are evil will try to manipulate you. Moreover, they’ll disrespect you, harass you, and violate your boundaries.

They will especially do this if you’re young and aren’t experienced enough to know how the world operates. Therefore, it’s imperative that you set firm boundaries and walk away from such people.

5. Facts about respect:

Respect isn’t something you should ever have to ask nor (gasp!) beg for.

If you’ve earned it and already give respect, it should come back to you naturally. However, if you must ask or beg for it, you’re with the wrong people.

Therefore, ditch these creeps without looking back. Love yourself enough to walk away and find better quality people to keep company with.

6. Respect is a two-way street.

Like anything else, it’s a give and take. Again, no one is entitled to it, they must earn it. In order to get respect, you must give it, and that includes giving it to yourself too.

7. Facts about respect:

Respect and like are different.

When you like someone, it means you share common ground with them and like having them around. On the other hand, when you respect someone, you have regard for their human rights or you have a certain reverence toward them because of their knowledge, wisdom or position.

You can have respect for someone you may not necessarily like. For example, if you’re a recruit, you may not like your hard-nosed drill sergeant, but you know to respect them. Moreover, your mother may do things that make you not like her at times, but you respect her.

Therefore, this is the difference between like and respect.

8. Respect has a purpose.

Respect is there to ensure that humans can live together in safety, peace, and harmony. It isn’t self-serving. It’s meant for the good of all living creatures.

On the other hand, if there’s no respect, there’s no regard for the safety of others. Therefore, without it, there can only be anarchy and lawlessness.

Why? because people who don’t respect you will violate your boundaries and jeopardize your safety every chance they get.

When people disrespect you, they do it out of self-interest:

1.To feel superior

2. To look cool

3. To look tough

4. To look bigger and better

5. To boast their egos

6. To assuage feelings of insecurity and inferiority

7. To look and feel powerful

8. To feel better about themselves

9. Facts about respect:

Respect is easily lost but harder to gain.

It take a while to earn respect and you must either work or contribute something to get it. Respect can take years to build.

However, it takes a split second to lose it. One wrong statement or one wrong decision can instantly destroy any respect you once had.

Moreover, bullies can unjustly take it from you. They can smear and defame you with lies and ugly rumors. They can destroy your reputation, causing others to lose the respect they once had. Unfortunately, this happens a lot these days.

Therefore, you must do everything you can to protect the respect you get and never take it for granted. Moreover, if bullies steal it from you, you must continue to do and say things which are respectful to others no matter what.

In time, people may see your actions and realize that you’re not so bad. Even better, they may see your bullies for the liars they are and things may turn around for you. This also happens as well.

this post gave you the facts about respect to teach you what it is, how you earn it, and how to keep it.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Like vs Respect: What’s the Difference?

2. Benefits of Self-Respect: 18 Good Results of Treating Yourself Well

3. How to Have Self-Respect: 7 Powerful Ways to Treat Yourself Well

4. How to Stop Being Too Nice: 5 Powerful Changes that Win Respect

how to build self-confidence and self-esteem in teenagers

How to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem

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‘Want to know how to build self-confidence and self-esteem? Here are the exact steps to more confidence and better self-esteem, which leads to better overall  mental health.

how to build self-confidence and self-esteem

You can have all the determination in the world and work like a dog but without confidence, you are just spinning your wheels. Why? Because determination without it equals desperation and desperation comes from a spirit of lack.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn how to build self-confidence and self-esteem so that you can feel better about yourself, stand up to bullies, and go after what you want in life.

Once you learn this important and life-changing information, you will be compelled to do what you must do to raise not only your confidence and self-esteem, but your overall happiness!

This post is all about how to build self-confidence and self-esteem so that you can change your life for the better!

How to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem

When you’re always unsure and insecure, it is a proven fact that you won’t perform as well at school or work. Moreover, you’re likely to have strained relationships.

High self-esteem and confidence levels equal great performance and rewarding relationships, which equals success. Therefore, all this combined equals even MORE CONFIDENCE than before!

Why? Because it reinforces more confidence!

A winning attitude is key to having success in any area of life. Also, you’ll have faith in yourself, which will get you through tough times.

One of my favorite speakers is Zig Ziglar and he talks about “Stinkin Thinkin” and the damage it can do to self esteem. Therefore, you must turn this “stinkin thinkin” into thoughts of success, gratitude, and happiness.

Only then will you be amazed as you watch every area in your life take a turn for the better. And it will happen like magic!

Once you Build it, you must maintain it.

However, once you build your self-esteem and confidence, you must maintain them. Moreover, they will still be times when you will fail. However, remember this.

Failure is the predecessor of success. You will always make mistakes. No one is perfect nor all knowing. Instead of beating yourself up over your errors, look for the lessons that they mean to teach you.

Also, search for the positive in the mistake.

When someone tells you that you can’t, pay them no mind. Others can steal your morale if you allow them to. Moreover, understand that is not easy to be yourself and stay sure when surrounded by bullies.

Know that there will be others who hurl jabs and insults your way. Moreover, some people just won’t believe you can be successful. However, don’t put too much stock into their opinions.

Instead, hold on to your confidence and self-belief even if you have to give yourself pep talks several times daily. Adverse things will happen and people will hurt you. It’s just a part of life.

To feel hurt, anger, or sadness is normal and expected when something negative happens. Also, there will be times in life when you will not feel confident. Things will happen and throw you off kilter.

However, the difference is that when you have confidence, you will bounce back more quickly and will be less likely to dwell in negativity.

How to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem:

If you have a negative mindset, you’ll need to reprogram your thinking.

For instance, if people bully you at school or at work, you’re more likely to feel insecure and have a horribly negative outlook. Therefore, it will take a lot of reprogramming in order to take back your confidence.

Moreover, it will be the hardest thing you may ever do in your life. It is easy to change certain things about yourself.

However, changing your thought patterns once others have conditioned you to think a certain way, is one of the hardest feats to accomplish. And it won’t happen overnight.

Negative thought patterns can take years to change completely.

However, once you start, little by little, you will see a positive difference in your outlook. Also, the circumstances that come into your life will change for the better.

You will begin to feel confident and the more confidence you have, the more momentum you will have behind it.

Therefore, always keep that momentum going and you will be on the right path for the rest of your life. With confidence and a winning smile and attitude, you can achieve beyond your wildest dreams!

How to build self-confidence and self-esteem:

Here’s how it works.

Through our thought patterns, we unconsciously ask for what we get, good or bad. Therefore, by sending a certain vibe out you always get the same in return.

In other words, if you are negative, you are unwittingly asking for more negativity to come into your life. On the other hand, if you are positive, confident, happy and at peace then you are asking for more of the same and it shall be given.

So keep showing your pearly whites and smile from the heart! I once heard Zig Ziglar talk about a spirit of gratitude.  Counting your blessings and being thankful are the fastest ways to turn any negative into a positive and with it comes confidence. He was right!

Here are the steps you can take to change your way of thinking.

1. Every time you catch yourself thinking a negative thought, turn it into a positive thought.

For instance, you have a test or an interview coming soon and, in your mind, you ask yourself, “What if I fail?” or “What if I don’t make it?”

Immediately catch yourself. Then, turn that thought into a positive one by asking yourself, “What if I pass?” “What if I succeed?” or “What if I do make it?”

Or, if you find yourself thinking, “What if things go wrong?” Immediately turn it around and ask, “What if things go right?”

Also, if you catch yourself thinking that you’re a loser. Tell yourself, “No. I’m a winner.”

Continue doing this until thinking positive becomes like second nature!

2. How to build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem:

Maximize your chance opportunities.

If you’re talented in writing and you find that there’s a writing contest enter the contest. In other words, instead of letting this opportunity pass you by because you’re too afraid that you’ll lose, face your fears and enter the contest anyway.

And you never can tell. You just might win that contest! The point I’m making here is to try! Because if you don’t try, you don’t know. Put another way, if you try, you at least have a good chance of winning. However, if you don’t, there’s no chance of it.

Therefore, taking risks is crucial if you want positive change in your life.

3. Get out of your comfort zone.

This brings us back to what we mentioned in the last section, taking risks. Confident people with high self-esteem take risks. Therefore, because they take risks, they score many successes.

This isn’t to say that you’ll succeed every time, because you won’t. Even confident people fail. However, they don’t let failure stop them.

The confident do not give up. Instead, they move on to the next chance opportunity and they keep trying until they reach success!

Remember the line in Rocky Balboa, “It ain’t about how hard you hit, it’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done.”

In other words, confident people get hit all the time, but they keep moving forward. They keep taking risks and they don’t stop until they get to where they want to be. And that’s how they win! So, don’t be afraid to take risks!

4. How to Build Self-confidence and Self-esteem:

Don’t Compare yourself to others.

Self-comparison is the killer of confidence and self-esteem. Therefore, stop comparing yourself to other people. Moreover, realize that we are all different and we’re each made to do different things and have diverse experiences.

Embrace the fact that each person has a different mix of talents. Some have more gifts, some have less. However, it doesn’t meant that those with less are less capable of success.

5. Turn negative self-talk into positive and loving words to yourself.

In other words, talk to yourself like you would your best friend. Instead of putting yourself down, begin building yourself up.

Giving yourself love and acceptance and know that you deserve it. Encourage yourself to keep going when things get tough. Give yourself the love you would give to your family and best friends.

6. Set goals and work hard to achieve them.

Set goals and go after them. Work hard and don’t quit until you achieve those goals. Moreover, never let bullies and jealous people discourage you.

Why? Because if word gets out that you’re working on a goal, there will be those who will do everything possible to discourage you. And this goes especially if you’re a target of bullying. Therefore, keep striving and don’t stop until you reach the finish line.

No matter what!

This post is all about how to build self-confidence and self-esteem so that you can achieve better mental health and better life results.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Be Happy Be Yourself: 3 Benefits You Reap When You Stop Caring What Others Think 

2. Bullying and Self Confidence: 7 Steps to Keeping Your Confidence Up When People Bully You

3. Knowing Yourself: Why it’s the First Step in Building Confidence 

4. Putting Yourself First: 7 Powerful Self-Care Practices

5. How to Overcome Low Self-Esteem: 7 Insanely Easy Ways

self-acceptance

Why is Self Acceptance Important? 21 Must-Know Reasons

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Sadly, many people go through life without self-acceptance. But why is self-acceptance important?

why is self-acceptance important

You may have heard the term “self-acceptance” many times before and may be asking yourself, “Why is self-acceptance important?” Moreover, you may not even know what it is.

Here you will learn the definition of if, why it’s important, and how you can achieve it in order to better your life.

Once you learn all these important details and put them to use, your confidence will soar and you’ll finally be able to take more control of your life and it’s trajectory.

This post will give you the answers to the question, “Why is self-acceptance important?” so that you can reap the benefits of it and reclaim your personal power.

Why is self-acceptance important?

Again, there are many reasons. However, first, lets discuss exactly what self-acceptance is and how it relates to bullying and it’s victims.

Anyone who has ever been bullied will tell you that it sometimes takes years to overcome the after-affects, get completely comfortable with yourself and find happiness.

Because of the torment they suffer, victims often withdraw and become shy. Moreover, the shyness can last a lifetime if they aren’t careful.

This reserved condition often comes from not only fear, but a lack of self-acceptance. Shyness is painful. Therefore, self-acceptance is the most important gift you can ever give yourself.

Here are the reasons that self-acceptance is so important.

1. you can see your own beauty.

A lack of self-acceptance blinds you to your own individual beauty. Therefore, once you accept yourself for all that you are, you will easily see your beauty and every good quality you have. You will then relax and just be.

2. you give yourself permission to make mistakes.

You realize that everyone screws up, including yourself. Therefore, you’re okay with making errors. You may not necessarily like goofing on a project, or singing off key. However, you’re still okay with the blunders you make throughout your life simply because everyone else does it too.

Moreover, you won’t try so hard to be perfect because you realize that perfection is impossible for anyone to reach. So, you’re able to just relax and go with the flow.

3. Why is self-acceptance important? You feel free to express yourself.

The reason many victims of bullying don’t practice self-expression is because they’re afraid that others won’t approve. In other words, they spend too much time worrying about what other people think or what they’ll say.

Therefore, they live in an invisible prison they don’t know how to escape from. The prison of whether they get other people’s approval. What they don’t realize is that they don’t need approval from anyone else.

However, when you express yourself, you don’t feel restricted. Therefore, you feel free to express yourself and aren’t the least bit concerned with what the people around you might think about it.

Why? Because you know that you don’t need the approval of others to live your truth and be who you are.

4. You feel free to be yourself.

In other words, you know you don’t need to try and be someone you aren’t. You don’t have to put on a big front to impress others. You’re completely comfortable in your own skin and as discussed in number three, you express yourself more freely.

Moreover, when you can be yourself, you’re relaxed, calm, and content with who God made you to be.

5. You accept all your flaws.

Why? Because you realize that everyone has imperfections. Therefore, you understand that you’re no different and you’re fine with it.

In other words, you accept all parts of yourself, the good and the not so good.

6. Why is self-acceptance important? You’re not afraid to display all your talents, gifts, and natural abilities.

Though others may criticize you for it, mostly out of jealousy, you keep showing what you can do best. Moreover, you’re not concerned with the way people may feel about it.

Sure. You like to display your natural gifts before others, but you do it because you enjoy it and not to impress anyone.

7. You feel free to have your own opinions, feelings, and beliefs.

In other words, you’re not afraid to voice those opinions. In today’s world, being an individual and having your own opinions is of the utmost importance.

Why? Because now more than ever, society frowns on differences of opinions and beliefs.  Agreeing to disagree is, sadly, becoming more and more out of date with the majority of people attacking those with differences in thought, taste, and opinion.

Understand that no two people are going to agree on everything. That’s why you must have the courage to have your own beliefs and convictions even if it causes others discomfort.

8. you work on getting to know yourself better.

You can begin keeping a journal and writing in it everyday. Also, you can take a few courses and try new things. These are a few ways to get to know yourself better.

9. You’re not afraid to grow, learn, and try new things.

Learning and trying new things brings growth. Moreover, it’s also exciting! Therefore, never stop learning, no matter how old you get. Because, when you stop learning, you become stagnant.

10. Why is self-acceptance important? Because You’re more likely to face your fears head-on.

Self-acceptance takes courage. Moreover, when you accept yourself, flaws and all, you’re more likely to take risks.

Risk taking is important because it brings you out of your comfort zone. And when you step out of your comfort zone and put yourself out there, amazing things happen!

11. you discover talents and abilities you never thought you had.

When you accept yourself, you’re more willing to try new things. And when you try new things, you’ll find those hidden natural gifts and abilities. Also, you’ll have the patience to practice them and the courage to show them to others.

12. You believe in yourself.

In other words, you believe that you can succeed at what you set out to do. You have confidence in yourself and are much less afraid to take on projects and tasks.

Moreover, you’ll be more confident in tackling anything life throws your way. Why? Because you know that you’re strong and that you’ll triumph over it.

13. Why is Self-Acceptance Important? Because You’re not afraid to set goals, work on those goals, and pursue your dreams.

People who accept themselves have goals to work toward and dreams to fulfill. They’re usually so busy that they don’t have time to worry about what others think and seek approval.

Therefore, accept yourself and be too busy doing you! This will only bring you success and happiness down the road if you don’t give up.

14. You practice self-care.

When you accept yourself, you love yourself. And when you love yourself, you’re more likely to take care of your body. In other words, you’ll make sure you eat right and exercise everyday.

Also, you’ll get plenty of rest at night and see the doctor if you get sick.

You will take care of your mental health as well. Moreover, you’ll do this by protecting your peace from bullies, abusers, and other toxic people.

15. You’re not afraid to set boundaries nor to enforce them if you need to.

In other words, you don’t put up with bad behavior from anyone. Again, you’ll protect your mental health by keeping toxic people out of your life and protecting your peace.

Moreover, you’re not afraid to set boundaries and call out anyone who verbally abuses you. And you aren’t afraid to walk away from people who take advantage of your goodness or get abusive with you.

16. Why is self-acceptance important? When you accept yourself, new opportunities and better situations open up for you.

You’ll think that the floodgates of heaven have suddenly opened and you are being washed away in a river of blessings.

In other words, your relationships will improve and you’ll suddenly begin attracting better people into your life. You’ll make new friends and associates.

Moreover, other opportunities will come through these new people, such as great jobs, careers, and travel.

17. You’re not afraid to show your silly side and have fun.

In fact, you’ll enjoy having fun and goofing off a little. Also, the people around you will enjoy it too because you’ll be a fun person to be around!

18. You’re better able to have compassion and empathy for others.

The prerequisite to loving others is to love yourself and that takes self-acceptance.

If you can’t accept yourself, you won’t be able to accept others either. This is why a lot of people become bullies and most bullies haven’t achieved self-acceptance.

Being a bully doesn’t score any points. Moreover, it doesn’t make bullies feel any better in the long run. Sure, they may feel better about themselves the instant they put someone else down.

However, that feeling won’t last long. In fact, it fades rather quickly. They’ll then need to attack someone else to get that fix and it will only make them look like insecure little cowards.

But when you accept yourself, you don’t worry about the opinions of others and are better able to give love and compassion to the people around you. Even better, you won’t feel the need to bully anyone.

Therefore, work on changing the way you see yourself and begin loving yourself more.

 Only then will you be able to properly love others.

19. Why is self-acceptance important? Your personal relationships improve.

Because you accept yourself, you accept others. You love yourself and give the same to others. This can only improve your personal relationships.

People love those who love them and they accept those who accept them. Therefore, your relationships can only get better, not worse.

20. You’re social life improves.

You become much more attractive to people and they are drawn to you like a magnet. And the individuals who are waiting for you to mess up actually get bored, give up and stop watching you. I know this from experience. Acceptance of self (all aspects) is such sweet freedom!

No one likes to be around a self conscious and insecure person with a victim-mentality who doesn’t like themselves.

Again, when you accept yourself, others will too.

21. You find peace and happiness.

Self-acceptance is one of the main stepping stones to happiness. When you accept yourself as you are, quirks and all, you release yourself from the enslavement of others’ approval. Moreover, you stop concerning yourself with how others see you.

In that, you lift a huge weight off your shoulders. This brings peace and happiness into your life.

This post is all about the importance of self-acceptance and the amazing life-changes it brings.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Benefits of Positive Thinking: 6 Positive Changes You’ll See

2. The Advantages of Having Enemies: 7 Powerful Positives

3. Secrets Bullies Hope You Never Find Out: 11 Must-Know Facts about Bullies

4. Knowing Yourself: Why it’s the First Step in Building Confidence

5. Setting Boundaries: 3 Powerful Practices to Hold Your Ground

when you stop caring what others think

When You Stop Caring: 9 Positive Results You’ll See

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‘Want to know what happens when you stop caring what people think of you? Here are the 9 life-changes you’ll notice.

when you stop caring

When you care to much, you hold on too tightly to the outcomes instead of letting things happen naturally and in their own time. However, caring too much can make you a slave to other people’s approval and permissions.

This is no way to live.

In this post you will learn the positives that flow into your life when you stop caring. Period.

Once you learn about all these advantages, you will be more willing to just relax and go with the flow.

This post is all about the amazing things that happen when you stop caring about other’s opinions and approval so that you can experience more freedom than you ever thought possible.

So, what happens when you stop caring about other peoples opinions of you?

1. You stop apologizing for being you.

Why? Because you stop allowing others to make you feel guilty for just being you. Instead of hiding your flaws, you begin to embrace them.

Moreover, Instead of judging yourself, you start loving and accepting yourself- all aspects, the good and the not-so-good.

Even better you begin living up to your own standards instead of someone else’s. In that, you start living life on your terms.

2. You set yourself free from the chains of fear and anxiety.

It’s like a weight that you take off your shoulders because you’re no longer a slave to others’ opinions and approval. Moreover, you stop walking on eggshells and hiding your natural humanness.

Also, you stop feeling like you aren’t good enough and comparing yourself to others. When you stop concerning yourself with the opinions of others, you no longer allow anyone else to dictate what you should say, do, think, or feel.

3. What happens when you stop caring?

You permit yourself to make mistakes.

Therefore, you free yourself. You realize that everyone makes errors whether or not some admit it. Even better, you begin learning from those mistakes and seeing them as life lessons, instead of defects

Moreover, you finally accept that you’re not and never will be perfect. Who is?

4. You gather the courage to be disliked.

Why? Because you realize that like and dislike are subjective, never personal. You accept that not everyone is going to like you and are not only okay with it, but you embrace it!

Moreover, you understand that a person who doesn’t have people who dislike them isn’t doing something right in one area or another. You also know that chances are that they aren’t embracing  their true, authentic self.

5. You follow your heart.

You freely do the things you love to do. Therefore, you sing, dance, speak your piece, and yes! Even act a little weird. In all this, You take back control of your life and find freedom you’ve never known.

The day you stop caring what people think is the day you get your life back!

6. What happens when you stop caring?

Your bullies slowly disappear.

Your bullies will notice the change in you. They’ll attack you, as usual, but suddenly, their pettiness doesn’t affect you like it once did. In other words, your bullies will notice that you no longer give them the reaction they’re looking for.

At first, they may try harder to get it. However, they’ll soon get the hint that you’re just bored with their childishness. And, when enough time has passed, one by one, your bullies will begin to disappear from your life.

Why? Because you’re no fun anymore and now, the bullies must search for an easier target to take your place.

7. You feel great about yourself.

In other words, you will begin to feel beautiful, smart, and, best of all, equal.

8. Positive things, events and circumstances begin coming your way.

Moreover, they will do it magically and seemingly without effort. You will begin attracting the right people into your life.

Instead of drawing in users, abusers and losers who are out to get something from you, you will draw in genuine people who were loving, caring, uplifting, and inspiring.

Existing relationships will drastically improve. An abundance of opportunities and blessings will flow into your life.

Also, you’ll start seeing wins and successes and life will become very rewarding and fulfilling. As a result, this will only encourage you to stretch your imagination, take more risks, and try new things.

9. What Are other things that you notice when you stop caring?

You look back and wonder why you even cared what your bullies and others thought.

Why? Because you’ll finally know that they never meant jack to you and couldn’t do anything for you. Moreover, you’ll realize that they’re not your family or friends. Also, you will think to yourself:

  • These creeps aren’t my family or friends.
  • They don’t pay my bills nor sign my paycheck every week.
  • These jerks don’t hold my life in their hands.
  • And they most certainly aren’t people I care anything about.

10. You wonder why you wasted so much time and energy on people who were never worth your consideration.

Why? Because you’ll realize that most of those people were never even worth your consideration.

Moreover, you’ll realize that the only opinions that matter are those of my God, your family, spouse and closest and most trusted friends.

You’ll also realize that the only things that matter are your faith in God, your dreams, morals, and taking care of the people you love. In addition, you’ll place value on your ability to be the best you that you can be, and on your desire to extend kindness and help those who need you.

Anyone or anything outside of that will be irrelevant.’

I understand that it’s difficult to love yourself when it seems no one else does. However, you must commit an act of rebellion against those people. And how you do that is to continue to love and respect yourself.

Realize that the best kind of love is the love you give yourself. Why? Because, without self-love, you won’t be able to love others properly and healthfully.

Therefore, you must decide that you’re going to love yourself no matter how others feel about you. However, it may not happen overnight.

This will be the beginning of a long journey. You may be about to take on an exceedingly difficult task. And that will be to reprogram your mindset.

In other words,, you’ll need to purge all the negative stuff people have told you for many years. And it won’t be easy by any stretch.

What happens when you stop caring? Life just gets better!

It will take reversing and undoing many years of abusive programming. Also, it will require a lot of grunt work.

Moreover, when you rise to this challenge, there will be times when others will fight against you. But, why would they do that?

Because they won’t like the differences they see in you. Understand that they’ll be threatened by the positive changes you’ll implement for yourself.

Also, your mind will fight against you as well. But, stick with it because that tiny spark within you will always tell you that you deserve better.

You’ll continue to vomit out all the garbage others have made you believe about yourself. And it’ll be difficult to cleanse yourself of the negative thoughts and self-beliefs that have kept you shackled for so long.

It will be a long fight, I won’t kid you. However, it’ll be so worth it in the end! You be be happy, confident, and comfortable in your own skin. In other words, you will experience a freedom you’ve never known!

So, continue to put in the work to break the chains that bind you.

If you’re a victim of bullying and haven’t gotten there yet. I want you to know that loving yourself is the hardest lesson you’ll ever learn.

11. What happens when you stop caring?

You turn your pain into power.

However, sometimes, you have to be torn apart to put yourself back together again. You have to be naïve to become wise.

Also, you must be weakened by bullying for several years before you can finally realize your own strength. And you have to be cheapened by others before realizing your worth.

And lastly, you must feel hate from others before you can love yourself fully and completely. There will be people who will drum so much poison into your brain and make you feel worthless. However, you have a choice whether to allow them to do that to you.

Realize that there are people who want you to hate yourself as much as they hate you. But don’t give them the satisfaction! Hold on to your self-love no matter how people bully and abuse you.

Here’s how you do it:

  1. Celebrate your successes even if you don’t feel up to it.
  2. Make a list of your positive qualities.
  3. Make positive affirmations.
  4. Reward yourself.
  5. Talk kindly to yourself.
  6. Catch every negative thought and replace it with a positive thought.
  7. Do things you enjoy most.
  8. Stay away from toxic people if at all possible.
  9. Surround yourself with positive people.
  10. Don’t put pressure on yourself to meet standards that are unattainable.
  11. Place no value on the opinions of people who aren’t worthy of your time and energy.
  12. BE YOURSELF!

If you practice these twelve things every day, I promise you that you will see change in your overall outlook. It won’t be easy, and it won’t happen fast. However, as mentioned earlier, it will all be worth it in the end. I guarantee it!

This post is all about what happens when you stop caring what others think and the positive changes that happen when you do.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. The Advantages of Having Enemies: 7 Powerful Positives You Can Take from It

2. When You Need Someone More Than They Need You: 8 Ways to Tip the Scales of Power!

3. Be Happy Be Yourself: 3 Benefits You Reap When You Stop Caring What Others Think

4. How to Stop Caring What People Think: 9 Powerful Steps

5. Removing Toxic People: 5 Successful Ways to Give Them the Boot

What Babies Can Teach Us About Confidence

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Babies are so adorable! They have that charm and innocence that no other age group has. They don’t worry about what others think of them and they never try to impress others. These little darlings display sweetness, purity, complete authenticity, and hearts of gold.

Babies have not a care in the world what people think of them. They have no inhibitions whatsoever. They’re not afraid to cry and express their wants and needs. You can see it in the way little toddlers shamelessly coo, laugh, babble, skip, run, and dance. And they’ll do it in front of anyone. These little sweeties are fearless. They’re not afraid to show their emotions, express their thoughts, show their creativity.

Furthermore, their precious little souls are completely open. They give, share, and receive love with an open and grateful heart. They love being loved and doted on and will receive it with a soft coo or laugh.

Everything starts with self-love and babies are a perfect example of it.

Sadly, as time passes and these babies grow bigger, the ways of people and the world slowly and incrementally taint their little hearts. Many grow up in toxic environments and with parents who excessively criticize and abuse them.

Therefore, they build a protective wall around themselves to try and keep the contamination out. Because family members and others discount, ridicule, even punish them for their feelings, they learn to mask those feelings. They collect emotional baggage as they become preschoolers, school-aged kids, then teenagers, and finally, adults.

Also, many are raised by drug-addicted, mentally ill, and neglectful adults and they build walls to protect themselves from that as well. Therefore, many must learn to raise themselves.

None of us have low self-esteem and lack of confidence at birth. Either ell-meaning family members who wish to keep us humble and sweet, instill those characteristics in us or bullies and abusers force-fed them to us.

Consequently, many adults will cause a baby to grow up thinking that they are unlovable. They don’t feel they deserve to have their wants and needs met. Thus, they grow up filled with either anger and self-loathing, or sadness and depression.

Life Has Ways of Eroding That Confidence and Goodness We Were Born With.

We all go through these terrible changes, even those who aren’t bullied. Only few people in this world manage to keep that confidence and joy they were born with. Furthermore, life’s disappointments, hurts, and heartaches have ways of doing these things to all of us. However, the worse changes happen to targets of bullying and abuse.

They stop expressing emotions and give up asking for anything. Why? Because sometime during their childhoods, other people conditioned them. They conditioned them to think that they’re self-centered and wrong for ever needing or wanting anything out of life.

Therefore, they resign themselves to the attitude that, things are “just the way they are” and that there’s nothing they can do to change anything.

Consequently, when you tell them about self-love and how important it is, they wince at the idea because it makes them uncomfortable. But, again, other people program them to think that self-love is somehow self-absorbed and evil. I can relate to this because, when I was thirteen and fourteen years old, I did the exact same when I was first told about the idea of self-love and self-care.

The thought of looking at myself in the mirror every day and telling myself “I love you” or “You’re beautiful,” “You’re Smart,” “You’re awesome,” etc., felt both weird. In fact, it felt downright sickening because I was under the impression that it was all a sign of sheer vanity.

It’s Sad When People Can Successfully Condition You to Believe that Self-love is Vanity

Self-love can feel downright painful after you’ve wasted years and decades hating and degrading yourself. After all, it’s not something you’re accustomed to practicing. Anything new and out of the ordinary feels painful at first. Like all things, it must first become a habit. And it can only become habit through rigorous learning and practice.

‘You see? My bullies and a few abusive others sold me on the idea that any form of self-care or self-love was abhorrent and self-serving. I was under the misguided belief that self-degradation and self-criticism was a virtue. It was a sign of being humble and meek. Therefore, I thought that was what normal people did, as I watched a few family members do the same thing.

Some of my family members still do this at times and it breaks my heart. If only they could see, I mean, truly see their value. . In my eyes, their worth is more than that of gold.

The truth is that self-hatred is the equivalent of having a millstone hung from your neck. You drag it around everywhere you go because it’s exhausting. Therefore, it zaps your energy. It takes the magic, wonder, and excitement from your life. And it keeps you stuck and worse, invites more disrespect and abuse from others.

Self-love doesn’t equal Vanity, It equals Virtue!

Self-love can only come from within, never from without. It doesn’t come from a partner, a spouse, or a boatload of friends. It can’t come from a banging body or fancy clothes, hairdos, or makeup. Money can’t buy self-love. Power doesn’t give it to you and neither does prestige. Self-love comes from the heart and only the heart.

Additionally, self-love is about self-acceptance and being perfectly okay with your imperfections. It comes from being comfortable in your own skin and not caring even the slightest what others think or say of you.

In order to find peace and joy in life, self-love is a must-have. It helps you to achieve your goals and realize your dreams and aspirations. It determines your outcomes- whether you succeed or fail. Also, it helps you to better re-frame bad situations and see them as learning experiences. Self-esteem and self-love give you peace of mind.

In a nutshell, self-love gives you complete freedom! It is the key to happiness and joy!

Don’t you think you deserve to be at peace with yourself? Don’t you think you deserve happiness and joy? I do.

So, be like a baby. Love yourself. Know that your true colors are vibrant and never be afraid to show them. Dance like you’ve never been ridiculed. And play like you’ve never fallen and scraped your knee. Express your emotions. Love, laugh, and live.

You’ll be surprised at how everything will change for the better! I promise!

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Ways to Build Your Child’s Self-Esteem

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Bullying can be devastating to a child’s or teen’s self-esteem. And the damage can last a lifetime. It can have a negative effect on their progress even into adulthood.

No, it isn’t your fault. You and your child are innocent in this, but you still must do some damage control.

The parents of bullies should teach them kindness and empathy, yes. However, the targets’ parents also have work to do- they must teach their children confidence. Neither side gets out of this without some degree of responsibility.

I realize that it isn’t fair that most of the confidence-building work must be done on the target’s end. But nothing in life is fair and we can’t change that reality. We, as parents of bullied children still have to take action. We still must do our part to ensure our children’s confidence stays in tact so that they’ll be able to flourish. Therefore, it’s up to us to tip the mental health balance more in the target’s favor.

Teaching targets confidence involves teaching them never to look to bullies, or anyone for that matter, for confirmation of their worth and validity. Most of all, it means creating experiences for them that naturally balance out all the negative experiences they face at school. To neglect this work would be devastating for our children!

How do you do that?

By giving them opportunities to make friends outside their toxic school environment.

For instance, they can join a martial arts class, a scout troop, or go to summer camp, to name a few. There are so many options available for targets to forge lasting friendships. And you will be amazed at just how it will help build their confidence and self-esteem.

Yes, kind words, encouragement, and verbally re-enforcing positivity to your child is important. But giving them the positive experiences that back up your well-meaning words will work doubly well because it will serve as confirmation that they really are good and normal kids and give the self-esteem that extra boost.

So, give your bullied child fun, exciting, and positive experiences that they can look back on with confidence and assurance! They will thank you for it later! I guarantee it!

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Why It’s So Important for Targets to Meet New People Outside the Bullying Environment

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If you’ve ever been a target of relentless and excessive bullying, meeting people, especially new ones, can be paralyzing. I can relate because I’ve been there. It’s easy to withdraw from social situations because you’re afraid the new person you meet will reject you. After all, it seems that everyone else you know already has, and you just can’t take another chance of it happening again.

But never be afraid to meet new people because they are opportunities for you to make friends and allies. Total strangers are the best people to meet and establish connections with. They make the best potentials because you have no history with them. They don’t know you from the bullying environment, so, you aren’t a target to them and likely will never be one.

With total strangers, you can begin with a clean slate and have opportunities to put your best foot forward and get a fresh start.

Therefore, when you meet someone new, don’t be shy or nervous. Find out what you have in common with the person to establish common ground. Be genuinely interested in the person because people love the one who’s interested in them and their lives. Make small talk and show them the awesome, one in a million you.

I promise you that you’ll be glad you did, and your confidence and self-esteem will shoot up tenfold!

With knowledge comes empowerment.

Reasons Bullies Hate Those Who Prefer to Be Themselves

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Bullies are fake. They have to be to instill fear in those around them. And they resent anyone content with themselves and comfortable in their own skin.

Here’s Why:

1. Most bullies are highly insecure– more insecure than others; people who are themselves are usually more charming, seductive, and graceful. An authentic person will captivate others without trying. Because of his openness and fluidity, he draws people to him like a magnet. And bullies are jealous of anyone who enjoys good relations with others.

Understand that not only are bullies insecure, but they’re also vain. Authentic people outshine them without even trying and just their presence alone makes the bullies appear less alluring and charismatic to others.

Avoid these vanity bullies like the plague because they will find a way to destroy you if you stay around them. These people will only force you to suppress your natural charm and goodness, so you won’t look like you’re better than them.

be yourself

2. People who are themselves don’t have to make any effort because they are their natural selves. On the other hand, being fake requires a lot of work. There are also a lot of worries that go with it- worries that you might slip up and get your lies twisted, that you may accidentally expose yourself through your actions, and that your true personality will somehow seep through.

Bullies resent the fact that authentic people don’t have to work and worry as they do.

But no matter what these bullies may throw at you, never be afraid to be yourself. Never hide anything about you. Because if you do, you’ll only lose a bit of yourself each time you put on an act until you lose yourself entirely.

To be fake, you have to work too hard. I’m too lazy for that. And so is anyone who prefers to be themselves.

Confidence is Everything!

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Confidence is the most important characteristic you can ever have, not only during school to ward off bullies, but all through life. It does not matter how smart you are or how high your grades are.

You can have five PhDs and be the smartest person on the face of the earth. But if you don’t have confidence, you will not be able to effectively communicate nor interact with people. Your social/people skills will be lacking and you won’t get anywhere in life.

Whether you choose to believe this, the reality is that other people really do have control over whether we succeed or fail in life. Other people are the gatekeepers to our success and if you think otherwise, you are only fooling yourself.

I’ll give you a few examples: You can’t get that high position you want without being selected for the job by another person- the interviewer, who could be the owner of the company, an HR manager, or supervisor.

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Even during school, although the vast majority of teachers and professors are honest and grade students fairly regardless of how they may feel about the individual, it’s still not unheard of for a student to receive a failing grade solely because the instructor didn’t like them. It does happen, though not often.

Confidence= great people skills= charm= great friends and connections= success!!! Great people skills will always trump smarts, good grades, high marks, and college degrees! Always!

Confidence, or lack thereof, is something that people notice right away when they meet you for the first time. When you walk into a job interview and meet your interviewer, he is going to notice right away whether you are confident in yourself and if you’re not, chances are very unlikely that you will get hired for that esteemed position that you have been coveting. The reason for this is that if you’re not confident in yourself, how then can you expect others to be confident in you?

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Make no mistake about it. Confidence is the number one ingredient in all areas of your life. It’s the first trait that potential employers look for and not only potential employers but also prospective associates, prospective customers, friends, and dates. Whether or not you are confident is something that everyone looks at unless they are so low on confidence themselves that they can’t afford to be the least bit selective.

This is why you must never let a bully take away your confidence. If another person has already taken it away, you must fight like crazy to get it back. You do this by surrounding yourself with people who love you and lift you up, doing the things you enjoy and are good at, showing off your talents, taking care of yourself, and taking pride in yourself and in your appearance. Only then will you begin to see your own worth.

If a person steals your confidence, they also steal your potential for success and happy life. In short, they steal your future. Bullies are confidence thieves! Never surrender your confidence to anyone! This brings me back to Ralph Waldo Emerson. He said it best when he made this quote:

“If I have lost confidence in myself, I have the universe against me.”

How right he was!