‘Want to know about bullying and double-standards bullies and others hold you to? Here are 7 things bullies get away with that others don’t.
Unfortunately, people holding you to double standards is a huge part of being a target of bullying. However, knowledge is power and it can be a tool you can use to overcome it.
Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about bullying and double standards so that you can call it out and use it to defend yourself.
Once you learn all about these game-changing information, you will be able to call it all out for what it is and use it to fight back.
This post is all about bullying and double standards so that you’ll have the knowledge to arm yourself with.
Bullying and Double Standards
Bullies are the biggest hypocrites! Moreover, another unfortunate reality of bullying is that they almost always hold you to their double standards.
The bullies, especially those in authority, will often condemn you for statements and actions they allow others to get away with. Ever heard the term, “selective outrage?”
Selective outrage is when people get angry at you for things they’d never get angry at others for. In other words, bullies select who to inflict their outrage on and who they should grant a free pass.
Here’s another thing bullies do. They demonize you for things that are harmless or innocent.
Merit goes out the window
Here’s another thing to be aware of. Bullies and their followers personalize ideas and creations, which are independent things that should stand on their own merit.
In other words, bullies and others will undermine or dismiss any idea or creation if they find out that it originated from you. On the other hand, if the exact ideas or creations come from anyone other than you, people will accept them. In fact, they may even praise them.
In short, it’s not about the idea or creation itself. It’s about who it comes from.
Sadly, the reality is that nothing- no action, statement, idea or creation ever stands on its own merit. Nothing is ever independent of the person who conceived it.
Bullying and Double Standards:
So, why Do people Set double standards?
1. To Assign different roles to different people in different positions in the social hierarchy.
In other words, they put them in place to assign good roles and more freedom to the people society approves of. On the other hand, people also set them to assign lower and more restrictive roles to those they hate or dislike.
No, it isn’t always fair. Therefore, should you continue to wonder why bullies defame and demonize you to others?
They do it to turn others against you, yes. However, they also do it because they know that once everyone is against you, you won’t have the freedom and mobility you once had.
Therefore, a bad reputation, whether you deserve it or not, keeps you down and locked in place. There’s no chance for advancement or mobility unless you leave the environment.
2. Bullying and Double Standards:
To elevate, angelize and benefit the people we approve of and to degrade, demonize and harm the people we disapprove of.
Understand that people hold a target of bullying to double standards for one reason only. And that sole reason is to stress, oppress and invalidate the person.
Again, it doesn’t matter whether or not you deserve it. What matters is how people feel about you.
Remember that emotions and personal feelings always- always take priority over logic. It always has and always will. And the sooner you accept it, the quicker and more effectively you will be able to find your way around it.
Here are a couple of ways you can get around a double-standard:
1. Go incognito if possible.
If you write a paper or invent something, don’t use your real name in the beginning. Use a pen name or pseudonym before submitting it.
If you have bullies around, they won’t know it was you who created it. Therefore, they will likely approve of it.
Then, once people approve and recognize the work for its brilliance, everyone will want to know who the mystery person is. Once an award has been prepared and everything’s all said and done, you can reveal who you are. Think of the movie, “The Cinderella Pact.”
I’ve also heard of people doing similar things in real life. However, this only works in certain situations.
2. Meet strangers who don’t know and haven’t heard of you.
Find and befriend strangers who don’t know of your damaged reputation. Then keep company with them.
These people are least likely to judge you because there will be no history or biases. With them, you start with a clean slate. Therefore, you can put your best foot forward and be your best you!
Reputations are hard to change, but with careful thought, inventiveness, and creativity, you can intelligently work your way around your circumstances.
When there’s a culture of bullying at school or in the company, everything is all about appearances. Therefore, it isn’t about what’s being done; it’s about who’s doing it.
Sadly, people often hold victims of bullying to a double-standard. Again, if someone makes a statement, it’s never about the comment itself.
It’s about who it came from. Unfortunately, politics, whether it be on a national, local, school, or office level, is rife with double-standards.
Bullying and Double Standards:
So, What do bullies get away with that others don’t?
1. Romantic relationships, whether it’s an affair or a Genuine Love Relationship.
For example, the student body and people in the community find out that a particular girl is in a monogamous romantic relationship. She and her boyfriend aren’t only dating; they have sex every weekend.
If she’s a target of bullying, she’s a “whore.” Moreover, her boyfriend must be with her for the sole purpose of getting in her pants.
It’s only a matter of time until he gets tired of her and dumps her for something better. Therefore, everyone uses her lack of celibacy as an opportunity to persecute her.
On the other hand, what if she’s one of the bullies? Also, what if she’s not a target of bullying? She doesn’t necessarily have to be one of the popular crowd. All it takes is not to be a target of bullying.
Therefore, she can be just an average Jane who blends in.
As long as she’s any girl who isn’t a target of bullies, she’s only a girl in love. She and her boyfriend are only experimenting and exploring the sexual terrain. This is just a normal part of being a young couple in love.
Therefore, everyone cuts her some slack. They don’t say anything about it. Or, they congratulate her for reaching the milestone of finding love and losing her virginity.
2. Bullying and Double Standards:
Partying, Drinking and Doing Drugs.
A boy in the school goes out, drinks and does drugs on the weekends.
If he’s a target of bullying, people will label him a worthless drunk or druggie. Moreover, they won’t let him live it down.
However, if he’s any boy who isn’t a target of bullying, people only say that he’s a hell-raiser! He’s only doing what most teenage boys will try at some point during their adolescent years. Therefore, others dismiss it as his being one of those rowdy kids from high school.
3. Getting Pregnant.
Students and school staff discover that a certain girl at school is pregnant.
If she’s a bullied girl, they’ll only label her a cheap little slut. Moreover, they won’t be surprised she’s “knocked up.” People shun her like Hester Prynne in Nathaniel Hawthorne’s “The Scarlet Letter.”
Moreover, everyone judges her harshly. They take on the attitudes that she and her baby will only live on welfare and leach from society. And they’ll do it while the non-bullied kids will move on to successful careers.
Others will make predictions. They’ll predict that they and everyone else will support this sorry excuse for a human being and her little spawn with their tax dollars.
But if she’s any girl who isn’t a target of bullying, she’s just a good girl who made a bad mistake. Therefore, everyone reaches out to her and extends compassion.
They may throw her a baby shower and celebrate the occasion. Do you see where I’m going with this?
Therefore, you must learn school, office, any kind of politics. Double-standards are firmly put in place to keep a select few down and oppressed.
Bullying and Double Standards:
In Conclusion
If you aren’t a target of bully, there’s margin for error. So, others allow you to explore many worlds. You’re allowed to make mistakes and you’re allowed to be a human being.
However, if you’re a target of bullying, you’re not afforded any of it. You’re not allowed to be yourself. You’re not allowed to be human because in the minds of others, you aren’t human at all.
Therefore, in the minds of the student body, you aren’t even allowed to be- to exist.
But no matter how they judge you, do it anyway.
- Allow yourself to make mistakes because that’s how you learn.
- Be yourself because that’s how you weed out the people who aren’t supposed to be in your life and attract into your world the people who belong there.
- Be human because being human is what exposes the people who are wrong for you and shows you the people who are right for you.
Don’t only exist, but live! Be alive! Live life to the fullest! Most importantly, know that happiness is a choice! And that you do have the power to choose.
This post is all about bullying and double standards so that you can recognize it, ignore it, and keep living your life the way you choose.
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