‘Want to know exactly how to document bullying? Here are all the things you need to record in your bullying journal if you even have trouble with bullies.
If you want to gather evidence that people are bullying you at school or at work, writing about it can be the first step to making a record of the attacks.
Therefore, in this post, you will learn exactly how to document bullying and all the things you need to write down so that you can have admissible evidence handy to present in court or at the company tribunal.
Once you learn all about this game-changing information, you will better be able to prove bullying and cover yourself should you ever need to take legal action or appear before a tribunal at work. Moreover, documentation is also the best thing to present before the school board if you’re bullied in school.
This post is all about how to document bullying so that you know exactly what to include in your bullying journal and write about it in a neat and organized manner.
How to Document Bullying
It is your responsibility to gather evidence that your classmates or coworkers are bullying you. Why do I say this?
Because, chances are that no one is coming to rescue you. Even if you report bullying to school staff or HR, it’s likely they won’t help you. In fact, they may hurt you in the long run. Why?
Because, although they may be in a position to help you, is doesn’t mean they will. If nothing else, remember this. Most people only have their own interests in mind. Therefore, you must be the one to gather your evidence.
Again, the responsibility is on you. No one else! Where targets and victims of bullying mess up is when they rely on others to investigate bullying. This is a grave mistake!
Why Document Bullying?
Bullying, especially psychological and emotional bullying, is difficult to prove. People in authority who are in a position to help you may not want to help you. There are several reasons why people who are in a position to help bullying victims often don’t.
Moreover, if you’re a teenager being bullied by a teacher at your high school, you especially need to document it! In other words, keep a log of the bullying.
There are six reasons why you should document bullying.
1. Bullies are master seducers.
In other words, they’re charming and alluring to others. Bullies are experts at sucking up to authority. Therefore, it’s likely that those in power will let the bullies off the hook.
Also, if your bullies are star performers and get high marks, they’ll use that as leverage. For instance, if school bullies excel academically, the school will likely protect them and blame you. Why? Because the bullies make the school look good.
Therefore, it takes more than simply reporting incidences of bullying to members of authority. Why? Because, in most cases, they will only rebuff and blame you.
These are only a few reasons why you must keep a journal if bullies begin targeting you.
Many bullies can also use good looks, impeccable dressing, and grooming to seduce others. We call this the halo effect. The Halo Effect is a phenomenon where those who look the best are the most trusted and respected by others.
A bullying journal helps you to keep a log of the abuse.
Bullies are slick! They are experts at deceiving authority and making you look like the bad guy.
Therefore, journals are the best way for victims to protect themselves. When you keep a bullying journal, you establish a pattern of bullying that is believable. Moreover, you also provide evidence to present in court if you decide to go the legal route.
Keeping a journal may be risky. However, I still urge you to keep one if you have bullies on your tail.
I’d also advise you to keep your journal safe at home. Never take it to work or school with you. Why? Because bullies are known for plundering through your belongings.
Therefore, you risk them finding it and snooping through it. So, keep it home and write about any of the day’s bullying events as soon as you get home, while your memory of it is still fresh. The sooner you write about it, the better.
2. How to Document Bullying:
Bullies are convincing liars and actors.
They have a flair for spreading the most convincing rumors and lies. Bullies do this to convince others not to associate with you. Therefore, they strip you of support and isolate you until you have no one to turn to for help.
For instance, let’s say that your bully won’t leave you alone. They keep pushing your buttons until they finally get a highly emotional reaction from you. Your bully will then weaponize your reaction while putting on a calm and collected demeanor in front of authority members.
This is why people in authority almost always side with the bully. Because they see your emotional response while the bully displays false coolness.
How do bullies weaponize your reaction? Simple. They point out your perfectly normal emotional reaction and take it out of context. They then twist everything to suit their narrative.
As a result, they successfully convince everyone that you’re the instigator. Moreover, they make you look unstable, overly dramatic, or too sensitive.
3. They Play the Victim
Another thing bullies do is cry those crocodile tears and play like they’re the victim. Therefore, those in authority will likely shift the blame onto you and protect the bullies.
Understand that seasoned bullies are master wordsmiths. In other words, they’re good at explaining and rationalizing any bad behavior.
They can spin a story that is so convincing that teachers and supervisors will find it hard not to believe it. In the end, you get the blame, the bullies get off Scot free, and you get punished for their behavior.
4. How to Document Bullying:
Documenting gives you a voice.
In other words, it allows you to have your say when no one else is listening. By documenting the abuse, you can tell you side without others interrupting you or ignoring you.
Moreover, it makes it harder for your bullies or anyone else to trivialize your experiences.
5. It Gives you a legal record of the bullying
For instance, if the bully hurts you badly enough to send you to the hospital, you can use your documentation as proof in court. Why? Because it will show that there was a long pattern of bullying before you got hurt.
Moreover, if you sue for psychological damages, the journal will also prove the bullying that cause you the psychological injuries. Again, documentation is admissible in court.
6. Keeping a journal is cathartic and therapeutic.
It allows you to express the emotions you otherwise couldn’t. Journals cannot trivialize your experiences, nor can they invalidate you in any way.
Journals are also confidential. They cannot go to the bullies nor anyone else and repeat what you tell them.
How do you Document Bullying?
Believe it or not, there is a right way and a wrong way to document bullying. Therefore, we’ll talk about the right way first. The best way to document is to use the 5W Method.
How to Document Bullying:
the 5W Method
1. What
Record in your journal what happened. When you write about it, describe the incident exactly as it unfolded. Include any exchanges of dialogue and by whom.
2. Who
Identify the bullies by writing down their full names. If necessary, include their titles and positions. Also, include the names, titles, and positions of any bystanders and witnesses.
If there were any teachers or supervisors present, add their names, titles and positions as well. They may not want to provide any testimonies. Also, they may even deny seeing the bullying attack.
However, if you document correctly, your bullying journal will expose them for the liars and cowards they are.
3. When
Record the date and exact time of the incident. Very important!
4. Where
You must include where the incident happened (school locker room, gym, bathroom at work, parking lot, etc.)
5. Why
Write down why it happened. For example, was the bully retaliating because you reported prior harassment?. Write down every detail!
If you don’t know why it happened, write that down. Moreover, if you need to, also describe how the incident happened.
Again, you owe it to yourself to document the bullying if you’ve tried talking about it and no one will listen to you.
What not to include in your journal
Pay attention to the quality of your documentation. Also, make sure you write everything neatly and legibly. You don’t want writing that isn’t easy to read.
Don’t be vague. Here are examples of vague statements in documentation.
- “Her words made me feel hurt and embarrassed.”
- “He assaulted me.” This is why detailed documenting is so crucial.
Always write everything down in the tiniest details possible. And no hearsay. In other words, none of the “he said, she said” stuff. Ever!
If you didn’t hear it with your own ears, it’s best not to record it. Only record your own experiences.
In closing, if people are bullying you, I can’t stress enough how important it is to have documentation of it. Documentation gets more credit than spoken words.
Why? Because when victims use the spoken word to describe what they’ve experienced, they can become emotional and end up rambling. And it will hurt you more than it will help.
When you’re being bullied, it’s not the time to be lazy. You must be proactive and document! It’s truly the best defense there is!
This post is all about how to document bullying so that you can have the best evidence if you ever need to prove a case of bullying.
Related posts you’ll enjoy:
1. Bullying by Teachers: 15 Proven Signs a Teacher is Bullying You
2. Empowerment: 7 Things that Come with It
3. Why Bullying Goes Unpunished: 7 Reasons to Stand Up for Yourself