There are three signs that verbal abuse will turn physical. Moreover, you would be surprised at how quickly and easily a bully (or any abuser for that matter) can change from letting their mouths do the talking, to letting their fists and feet speak for them.
here’s a scenario you’ll probably recognize
Bullies have been verbally abusing you for quite some time. You remember how they began with subtle digs and zingers. Next, you noticed that they progressed to openly screaming at you, cursing you out like a dog. Now, they are making threats of violence against you. You’ve begun to feel afraid because you’re not sure when the bullying will become physical and what they’ll do to you when it does.
Understand that your bullies are still pushing your boundaries. Little by little, they up the ante to test you and figure out how you’ll react and see what you’ll let them get away with. So, they always start small. And they ever so gradually turn it up in teeny tiny increments.
So, how do you know when the bullying you suffer is about to become physical? Here’s how:
1. they invade your personal space
When bullies invade your space, it’s a surefire sign that things are about to get physical. They get a little too close. They’ll follow to close behind you as you’re walking down the hallway or street. They’ll stand too close to you in the lunch line or while you’re punching the time clock. They may even step in front of you and block you from going any further.
Therefore, to prevent a possible physical attack, the time to act is now! You must tell them in no uncertain terms to back off. And if they don’t, it’s time to strike first. Yes! You heard me correctly. I’m not beyond hauling off and punching someone in the nose if they get in my face and refuse to back up off me.
However, be aware that you may be in a place that isn’t suitable for punching a bully, like on the job or in class. In lieu of fighting, I recommend that you look the bully dead in the eye with the hardest glare you can muster. Then tell them in a low, growling voice to knock it off. And keep glaring at them until they avert their eyes away. Make sure you’re standing absolutely still and facing them in a power pose. (More on power poses later) The goal here is to put the fear of God in the bully.
2. they lay claim to your things and your territory
Also, bullies may also sit at your desk, pick up your belongings, or lean on your car. Understand that in touching your belongings, bullies are laying claim to what is yours. This is the time to assert yourself firmly. Tell them to keep their slimy, grimy paws off your stuff!
Messing with your belongings or destroying them is also considered to be physical bullying.
However, be forewarned that most bullies will see this as a challenge and dare you to do something about it. In this case, don’t be afraid to throw up your dukes. It’s your stuff they’re messing with and they’re doing it to see how far they can push you!
But, just as I mentioned earlier, if you use fisticuffs, make sure the time, place, and conditions are as close to right as possible. If not, do what I suggested at the end of the last section.
3. they will begin assaulting you and making it look like an accident
Bullies will begin their physical assaults through“accidental” shoves, pushes, and bumps. They may do things accidentally on purpose– “accidentally” running or bumping into you in the hallway or parking lot, “accidentally” tripping you or knocking you down, or “accidentally” knocking things out of your hands. They will say, “Oh, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to (trip, shove, run into you, etc.). And they’ll say it knowing damn well they did it deliberately. Also, you’ll know it too.
Moreover, they do it, thinking that maybe, just maybe, you won’t notice it’s escalating. After all, accidents happen all the time. No harm, no foul. Right?
The problem is that if bullies get away with these types of games, they’ll only escalate it until it gets out of control. And once bullying gets out of control, it’s almost impossible to stop or even slow it down. Again, it’s time to throw up those dukes! Remember not to doubt yourself and what you know and feel. And you always know when something is done on purpose. You can sense these kinds of things.
Like any other form of abuse, Bullying will only get worse if you don’t act.
Understand that bullying, or any form of abuse, always- always gets worse if you let it slide. Because it’s a dark part of human nature to push, push, and push further to see how far one can go.
Again, tune into your body and intuition because they will tell you whether what the person did to you was deliberate or an accident. If your senses tell you they did it on purpose, call it out and tell them to stop it right when it happens. If that doesn’t work and the bully keeps it up, it might be time to throw down. But, whatever you do, put a stop to it because it’ll only get worse if you don’t.
With knowledge comes empowerment!