Tag: prejudice

When the Labels Meet People Before You Do

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The most insidious thing about being a target of bullying is the loss of opportunities to meet new people. In other words, you lose the inability to move on with new friends. When bullies and their drones have unjustly slandered or libeled you, even total strangers will no doubt hear of you. Then, chances are that they will automatically have their minds made up about you before they get a chance to meet you. Sadly, this is one feature of bullying that crosses very few people’s minds.

invisible enemies

What’s even scarier you are left completely defenseless against any attack these strangers may bring. When you haven’t the slightest idea who your attacker is, how do you know who to watch out for? How do you know who to avoid? It’s impossible to protect yourself from invisible enemies.

This is often the case once bullies have unjustly used smear campaigns against you. It is a situation in which you are walking blind and it’s even more dangerous! You cannot see the enemy. Someone could walk right up to you on the street, in broad daylight, with a weapon hidden on them and you would never know of their intent to hurt or kill you until it was too late.

Remember. We lost the Vietnam War because we didn’t know who the enemy was. We didn’t know exactly who was or wasn’t on our side!

Fighting Ghosts

It’s the same when you are a target of bullying, especially if you live in a rural area where everyone knows everyone. Once your tarnished reputation reaches so far, there will be times when you won’t know who is coming for you. And it will be as if you are fighting ghosts.

Sadly, in these cases, the bullying has for so long gone on that your reputation in the community has become ironclad, and there isn’t much you can do to change it. Therefore, the best you can do to better your life is to move away and get a fresh start in a new town. It will be the only way you will find happiness and stability.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

The Strongest, Bravest, and Purest Souls!

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…are the mentally disabled people with special needs.

If you’re from my generation, I’m sure you remember the series from the early ’90s, “Life Goes On.” And if you remember this television series, then you automatically think of Corky Thatcher, the mentally challenged middle child of the Thatcher family, played by Chris Burke. He, in real life, has Down’s Syndrome.

I’m not writing this for personal gain. The chances are that neither Chris Burke nor any of the other cast members or producers will ever read this post, which is only proof that I write strictly from my heart and about what I’ve noticed on many, many occasions throughout my lifetime.

The Mentally and Intellectually disadvantaged have the purest and sweetest of hearts, yet they live in a world that looks down on them. They’re unwanted- shunned, ridiculed, and brutalized. Yet, most of them maintain their smiles and their unconditional kindness. Their moral compasses never waiver. They’re innocent, childlike, and have hearts of the purest gold.

They Exhibit the Most Resilience

I write books about unsung heroes, who are different and who bullies target daily. But I’ll tell you this:

These courageous, amazing real-life heroes are the best of the human race! I admire their unbreakable will, unshakeable courage, dogged determination, and amazing ability to keep smiles on their faces even under the most challenging of circumstances!

These are the people who have the fortitude to overcome odds that would be overwhelming to a cast majority of people. And I state this with full conviction.

These beautiful souls also work the lowliest of jobs- jobs that most people think are beneath them. They display the best work ethic, the most dedication, and the most pride in their work. Yet, others treat them the worst and supervisors and coworkers devalue the mentally disabled.

Most Others Don’t Appreciate nor Value Them

These angels have more heart and soul than those who are “normal” and twice their ages.

You have to wonder how they do it. How do the mentally and intellectually disabled find the resolve to go up against such tremendous odds every single day? How do they keep pushing amid jeers, jokes, and cruel insults? Situations under which most “normal” people would’ve thrown in the towel?

Another reason why I salute the mentally and intellectually challenged is that they don’t let on that they even realize it when the rest of the world is showing it’s booty to them. They’re the people who never complain nor seem to feel sorry for themselves like most “normals” do any time life gives them a one-two punch. Yet people give them the least respect. Others devalue and abuse these people the most- all because they see them as having the least power of all!

The mentally and intellectually disabled don’t retreat into drugs and alcohol. Instead, they retreat into their work and hobbies. They keep their minds occupied with things that interest them.

They Display the Most Talent

I’ve found that these people show the most talent in the arts. Many of them draw and play musical instruments like professionals! Yet, others overlook those talents because of who they belong to!

I don’t claim to know for sure, so I can’t speak for all the mentally and intellectually disabled. But through my observations over the years, I’ve come to realize that, maybe, the reason the mentally and intellectually disabled seem to handle adversity with such grace and aplomb is that they’ve accepted it as their normal.

I’m not saying that they don’t get hurt by it because they have feelings too. They have the same desires as everyone else- to be loved and accepted for who they are. We all have the desire to be apart of something and to be included. Humankind is hardwired that way.

But the mentally and intellectually challenged have such a way of bouncing back from years of repeated rejection- back to their cheerful selves much quicker! And they forgive much more easily!

They Forgive the Quickest

That’s what makes them such beautiful souls! They’re the brightest and most brilliant lights in a very dark world! And it will go to their credit and be celebrated in The Afterlife!

Therefore, all I can say to the millions of earth angels is this:

Keep up the good fight! Keep being a shining example to the rest of the world! I love you all!

My novel, “Kids Under the Latch Key,” is a first-person narrative about a mentally handicapped young man named Randy and a group of neighborhood kids who take him under their wings and protect him from the cruelty of several people in a small Southern town, who bully and label him because he is different. It is narrated by a now middle-aged Grace, who is one of the kids who befriended Randy and tries to protect him before an unexpected and tragic turn of events intervenes. The tragedy prompts Grace to question God and gives her a new perspective of the world and of people in general.

“Kids Under the Latch Key” by Cherie White

Special Needs Children and Adults: Why They Suffer Such High Rates of Bullying

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cute girl in wheelchair playing with developing toy in kindergarten for children with special needs

People with autism and other neurological disorders suffer extremely high rates of victimization and bullying.

It’s bad enough that they must go through life struggling with a disability that they neither asked for nor have any control over. Even worse, they also struggle with constant cruelty from people in the general population because of that disability.

“A new study finds that children with autism spectrum disorders are bullied for more often than their typically developing peers.” (healthland.time.com)

According to Time Magazine (the above link), 46% of children on the spectrum reported being bullied compared to only 10% of neurotypical kids.

And the statistics are estimated to be even higher due to either being nonverbal and the inability to read social cues and, therefore, recognize the subtler forms of abuse. No one can report anything they do not know is occurring.

Because of their difficulty reading social cues, having repetitive behaviors, and being highly sensitive to external stimuli, bullies quickly zero in on these perceived weaknesses and see these people as easy prey who are ripe for harassment and degradation. Those with special needs are targeted because of their extreme vulnerability and inability to assert and defend themselves. In the minds of bullies, people with special needs are easy prey.

Special education words on cork background

Bullies get a rush out of the power they wield over their special needs victims because they consciously know they can torment them endlessly and with impunity. They also know that the chances are that no one will stop the abuse nor speak out for the victim because the sad reality is that most others do not see those who have special needs as “human.” Therefore, bullies take full advantage.

Anyone who intentionally targets a person with special needs is, in my opinion, a coward of the lowest common denominator. Too afraid to go toe to toe with someone of their equal, they seek out victims who cannot speak for or defend themselves!

Every day, mentally disabled people have Autism/Asperger’s or Down’s Syndrome are accosted, taunted, physically attacked, or even murdered because they are considered different and to be easy targets. Laws must be firmly put in place to protect these people, who are unable to defend themselves. Any crime against people in the above categories should be considered a hate crime because of the high vulnerability and severe disadvantage compared to neurotypical people, which equals a clear-cut imbalance of power.

It’s discrimination, any way you look at it, and just as horrible as bullying someone due to age, sex, race, religion, or orientation. Besides, most people in the other five groups have the facilities to speak for and defend themselves. They can demand equal treatment. People with special needs can’t, which is why we MUST make those with special needs a protected group!

The neurologically challenged are already fighting a very tough and likely, lifelong battle. Why do those who are more fortunate wish to make their lives much more complicated than they already are?

With knowledge comes empowerment!

When People Lump You into A Category Based on The Bad Behavior of Someone Close to You

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I hear these stories all the time from people who have a ne’er do well brother, an uncle who’s the town drunk, or a sister who’s notorious for being promiscuous. But whether your dad did a stint in prison, or your mom is perceived by others to be the town nut-job, know that these are things you have no control over and therefore, are not your responsibility. You aren’t defined by the lousy choices or unfortunate circumstances of a few relatives.

Yes, I know that the judgement people heap on top of you hurts and hurts terribly, but I want you to know that you’re an innocent person in all of it. You’re an individual and you shouldn’t feel ashamed of anything because you’ve done nothing wrong. Realize that humans have a bad habit of lumping people into categories, whether justly or unjustly. And they’re wrong for painting you with the same brush based on bad choices a few of your family members made.

People also do this with different races and ethnic groups as well. It seems that many automatically think that all Blacks are thugs, all Whites are racist, all Native Americans are savages, all Hispanics are illegal aliens and so forth.

Yes, I’ve heard all the above statements throughout high school, in a few workplaces, even in the news media and it’s all garbage! We should all know that none of it is true. There are some of the greatest, loving, and most tenderhearted people in every race and there are many who don’t live up to the ignorant stereotypes that society likes to hoist upon them.

Therefore, I want you to know that anyone who puts you in a category with a few evil bad apples, or people who’ve simply made bad choices, doesn’t know the individual you. They do not know your heart nor your inner reality. And they don’t know what you think and feel.

Nobody can possibly know these things but you and God. And if they claim they do know, they’re only playing God by claiming to know the unknowable. Realize that when people perceive you to be someone you aren’t, their thoughts and opinions aren’t worthy of even being considered and you shouldn’t place any value to them.

In fact, you should kick these people to the curb because they aren’t worth your time nor energy. You deserve people in your life who get you- who love you for you and the good you bring to this world.

So, know that you deserve better and that you are not the labels others stick to you.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Bullying and Bias Go Hand in Hand

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Humans tend to be selective of those who are more like them because sameness brings comfort and security. We can choose who to date, who to be friends with, hang out with, and with whom to do business. We choose who we choose.

I can agree that we have the right to choose the people we associate with. What we don’t have the right to do is mistreat, dehumanize, and demonize the people we don’t choose. Although we may not like certain people, we should respect their right to human dignity and to exist. We should let them go on with their lives and pursue their happiness, goals, and dreams, rather than try to hold them back just because they’re different from us.

Though we may not like a person, we must know that that person is due the same human rights. And where we go wrong is when we regard anyone different from us, “the enemy,” solely on their differences and not because of any actions they’ve done against us.

In deeming someone an enemy without just cause, we force them to become our enemy by the abuse we commit against them. Our offense justifies their defense. We make them an adversary by provoking them to fight back and defend themselves.

Biases can cause a kind of tunnel vision in that we can’t see outside our comfort zones. Sameness and familiarity may make people more comfortable and give certainty and security, but, on the downside, it causes narrow-mindedness and short-sightedness. It produces blind spots, and the more biased we are, the more we miss, or rather, reject information that may broaden our horizons and make us better and more informed people. In short, it promotes blindness to the world around us.

It’s like living in a small town all your life and never venturing outside the city limits. There’s so much you miss because there’s a much bigger world outside that small town.

It’s the same with selecting the same types of people to be in your life- people who look like you, think like you and act like you. You cheat yourself out of meeting many people who are also great and exciting. You miss out on people you could learn from and who would otherwise be significant assets to your life- people who would otherwise be great friends and add love and positivity to your life.

After all, “variety is the spice of life.” Right?

On the other hand, when you base your biases only on character and open yourself up to people who are different from you, you open yourself up to a much wider world. You broaden your outlook, widen your vision, and open yourself up to a broader range of ideas that might add benefit to your life.

With knowledge comes empowerment.

Bullying and Rising Rates of Antisemitism

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The Jewish people and other minorities have been bullied worldwide, down through history, as have women. They’ve been intimidated by individuals, groups, corporations, schools, communities, and governments!

Recently, there has been an uptick of antisemitism from individuals, interest groups, certain celebrities, even government officials, such as Ilhan Omar and several others! They have also been attacked right here in America by Radical and Extremist Groups.

Understand that antisemitism, racism, and sexism are all forms of bullying because there is a clear-cut power imbalance. The evil committed against the Jewish people has been repetitious for so long!

People may disagree with me and may even get angry. But it is what it is, and I’m not going to hide it nor sugarcoat it.

Most bullies are bigots and racists because bullies are known to have hatred for anyone different from them in any way, although most of them would never admit it for fear of losing face. However, bullies must always have a target to degrade.

So, they prefer to bully someone safer to bully and not as legally protected, such as a person on the autism spectrum, who’s mentally ill, or an older person.

Understand that bullies despise differences from them in any way, and you can bet that most bullies are only closet racists and sexists. Still, because they choose to go the “lesser of two evils” route and be more politically correct to play it safe, they only bully those to whom they can do it and get away with it.

Understand that racism is wrong, no matter who it’s aimed at! Antisemitism is wrong! Hate is wrong!

Just because someone is different in race or skin color, in the religion they practice, or lives a different lifestyle, it gives no one the right to mistreat them!

Eliminate the hate!

Bullies Who Bully People with Special Needs

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cute girl in wheelchair playing with developing toy in kindergarten for children with special needs

For months, I’ve wanted to speak out about people with autism and other neurological disorders and the extremely high rates of victimization and bullying they endure.

It’s bad enough that they must go through life struggling with a disability that they neither asked for nor have any control over. Even worse, they also struggle with constant cruelty from people in the general population because of that disability.

“A new study finds that children with autism spectrum disorders are bullied for more often than their typically developing peers.” (healthland.time.com)

According to Time Magazine (the above link), 46% of children on the spectrum reported being bullied compared to only 10% of neurotypical kids.

And the statistics are estimated to be even higher due to either being nonverbal and the inability to read social cues and, therefore, recognize the subtler forms of abuse. No one can report anything they do not know is occurring.

Because of their difficulty reading social cues, having repetitive behaviors, and being highly sensitive to external stimuli, bullies quickly zero in on these perceived weaknesses and see these people as easy prey who are ripe for harassment and degradation. Those with special needs are targeted because of their extreme vulnerability and inability to assert and defend themselves. In the minds of bullies, people with special needs are easy prey.

Special education words on cork background

Bullies get a rush out of the power they wield over their special needs victims because they consciously know they can torment them endlessly and with impunity. They also know that the chances are that no one will stop the abuse nor speak out for the victim because the sad reality is that most others do not see those who have special needs as “human.” Therefore, bullies take full advantage.

Anyone who intentionally targets a person with special needs is, in my opinion, a coward of the lowest common denominator. Too afraid to go toe to toe with someone of their equal, they seek out victims who cannot speak for or defend themselves!

Every day, mentally disabled people have Autism/Asperger’s or Down’s Syndrome are accosted, taunted, physically attacked, or even murdered because they are considered different and to be easy targets. Laws must be firmly put in place to protect these people, who are unable to defend themselves. Any crime against people in the above categories should be considered a hate crime because of the high vulnerability and severe disadvantage compared to neurotypical people, which equals a clear-cut imbalance of power.

It’s discrimination, any way you look at it, and just as horrible as bullying someone due to age, sex, race, religion, or orientation. Besides, most people in the other five groups have the facilities to speak for and defend themselves. They can demand equal treatment. People with special needs can’t, which is why we MUST make those with special needs a protected group!

The neurologically challenged are already fighting a very tough and likely, lifelong battle. Why do those who are more fortunate wish to make their lives much more complicated than they already are?

Bullying People Perceived to Be Mentally Ill or Neuro-Diverse

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It’s comparable to racism.

Discrimination is discrimination, and prejudice is prejudice. It doesn’t matter who’s dishing it out or who is receiving it. The mentally ill and mentally disabled are still a minority; it doesn’t matter their sex, race, religion, or orientation. Even if you think that person is “crazy” and they happen not to be, you’re still guilty of discrimination, prejudice, and bias.

The mentally ill and disabled are favorite targets of bullies for several reasons:

1. They are different.
2. They are least likely to have the ability or know-how to defend themselves.
3. They don’t have the same protections as other minority or oppressed groups (racial minorities, women, LBGTQ, elderly, etc.).
4. Others flippantly disregard the mentally ill and disabled and do not see them as human.
5. They are least likely to be believed or taken seriously if they report abuse and victimization.

All the above leave the mentally ill and disabled most vulnerable, and bullies take full advantage! It’s no different than being a racial minority, a woman, a member of the LBGTQ community, or being a senior citizen.

In fact, it’s worse because other oppressed groups have more legal protections under the law than the mentally disadvantaged. Therefore, if you are a bully and you target these people, or you stand by and watch it happen without speaking out, you are no different than a card-carrying racist, homophobe, or misogynist!

There’s a term for this kind of bullying. It’s called Ableism!

Here’s something I’ll bet no one has thought of. If a person bullies these people, they probably are a racist, etc. They only hide it because it’s politically incorrect and against the law, and it’s not considered by society to be as evil or illegal to discriminate against those who are or are perceived to be mentally disadvantaged. The mentally ill are safer victims to bully, so they’re who bullies target.

Therefore, it would be safe to say that most bullies are racists and sexists at heart because bullies don’t accept anyone who is not like them. It doesn’t matter what the difference is.

The more you know.