The Best Revenge Against Bullies: What is It?

January 20, 2026December 19, 20252 Comments

‘Want to know the best revenge against bullies? Here’s the one thing that will hurt them more than anything you could ever do.

The best revenge against bullies isn’t about retaliation. It isn’t about getting payback. So, what is it? In this post, you will learn the best way to come out on top.

Once you learn what the best revenge against bullies really is, you will be more compelled to rise above your bullies the right way.

This post is all about what the best revenge against bullies really is, so you can do what you need to do to take care of yourself and live a peaceful life.

The Best Revenge Against Bullies

Let’s get into it. What is the best revenge against bullies? There are three ways to win against your bullies. Here they are.

1. Living a Peaceful Life

As the old saying goes, “living well is the best revenge.” And it’s one of the most factual statements you’ll ever hear or read.

When you live a peaceful and drama-free life, people, especially bullies, will despise that. Why? Because they want you miserable like they are. Therefore, they will do something to disrupt it.

The best way to avoid this and keep tranquility in your life is to avoid toxic people. This is the best way to prevent disruptive individuals from disrupting your peace.

2. Success.

Yes! You read this correctly! Success is, by far, the best revenge you can ever take against your bullies. Why? There are several reasons!

Most bullies believe that they are superior to you. Any time you make an achievement, they will see it as a threat to their power. Then, they will increase their attacks against you.

And they will do it not only to punish you, but also to keep you in your place. Therefore, it isn’t always safe to share your accomplishments.

Moreover, your bullies might convince others that you are bragging. In cases like this, please allow someone else to announce your success rather than doing so yourself.

And, again, sometimes it’s better to keep it quiet.

The Best Revenge Against Bullies:

Not everyone wants you to succeed.

You must realize that not everyone wants you to succeed. And this includes some of your closest friends.

Why? Because your success would force them to reflect on their own personal failures. If you’re a target of bullying, your bullies will be damned before they allow someone they see as inferior to reach success and overshadow them.

Bullies consider any success you enjoy as a personal affront. Any time you achieve a goal, you score a win. And when you score a win, you force your bullies into a place of lesser power.

It’s you who gets the recognition, praise, and glory, not your bullies. And they know it! In other words, you force them into the shadows while you get to shine. You get to be recognized for your accomplishments.

This infuriates your bullies because they aren’t the ones in the spotlight! Understand that bullies crave attention and adoration most. And when they find that you’re getting more of those things than they are, it’s Katie bar the door!

The Best Revenge Against Bullies:

IF you score a win, your bullies will make you pay for it.

Naturally, they will retaliate by launching all sorts of attacks against you. Your bullies will make all sorts of accusations. They may throw shade by bringing up your past mistakes.

You must see through their behavior. They only do it because their power has been threatened. And when your accomplishments drive them into obscurity, they reveal their true colors.

Therefore, you force them to expose themselves and their evil personalities. So, how do you handle this?

You handle it by staying above it. Refuse to react to the bullies’ foolishness. Instead, continue enjoying your wins and successes and let them stew in their own juices.

Let them talk. Let them launch all the personal attacks they desire. Watch with a smile as they seethe themselves into a ball of madness!

Because when they act out and spew nonsense against you, they only dig their own graves.

If you haven’t made any accomplishments yet, work quietly and stealthily until you reach your goals. The more quietly you work, the less interference you’ll have from anyone.

And the fewer roadblocks you will run into along the way. And once you reach your goals, then you can bask in it, and with it, give your bullies the surprise of their lives.

“Your journey is silent, but your destination will be loud.”

1. It’s a type of revenge in which you don’t have to resort to being petty nor violent.

In achieving success, there’s no need to say a word or lift a finger against the bullies. In this, you can silently exact revenge without reducing yourself to the bullies’ level.

As a result, you don’t look petty in the eyes of others!

2. The Best Revenge Against Bullies:

Envy and jealousy are natural human tendencies.

It’s a fact that most people hate to see others succeed and reach their goals and dreams. And secretly, bullies take pleasure in watching others, especially you, suffer.

However, when you become happy and prosperous, it takes the wind out of the bullies’ sails. It only disappoints, frustrates, or even angers them. All while you continue to smile, shine, and move on to even bigger things!

Therefore, if you’re a victim of bullying, any successes you achieve will automatically incite jealousy.

3. If you’re lucky, you get to watch your bullies seethe as you collect your accolades.

And hey! Let’s be real here! There’s nothing more satisfying than watching your bullies squirm with jealousy and rage as you get recognition for your accomplishments!

And if you want, you can covertly eat your bullies alive by looking at them with a taunting smile!

So, find something you enjoy doing – something you are good at! Practice and perfect any talents and gifts you’ve been blessed with. Then display those talents before the world!

Your self-esteem will skyrocket. And you never know where it may take you!

4. The Best Revenge Against Bullies:

You prove them wrong

Bullies despise it when you show them up. When you prove a bully wrong, you show everyone else that they aren’t so perfect.

This undermines their image. Therefore, they’ll try to get back at you to repair it.

5. You outshine them

Upstage a bully, and you’ll get tons of flak for it. To your bullies, you are inferior, and they want you to stay that way.

If you make a significant accomplishment, this makes your bullies look less important. You naturally overshadow anything they’ve accomplished. And they’ll do everything possible to try to reduce you to a place of inferiority.

Bullies Hate Competition

Bullies hate competition. And they despise it, especially when it’s you they must compete with. If someone they deem inferior outmatches them in any competition. Oooo! Talk about a blow to the bully’s ego. Ouch!

They see your accomplishments as a threat to their superiority. Why? Because the bullies’ sense of self-worth is rooted in one-upmanship.

Therefore, they will get angry and say things like:

“You think you’re better than us!”
“You think you’re hot stuff!”
“You think you’re so f***ing cool, don’t you?”

I’ve come to realize that any time a bully makes any statement that begins with, “You think you’re…,” it usually means jealousy. And it means anger, or resentment aimed at you for a success or desirable quality that you have. Always!

Understand that those three little words can say so much.

The Best Revenge Against Bullies:

They despise your confidence.

Bullies despise any confidence you have. Why? Because when you’re confident, you believe in yourself. Therefore, you don’t let others define who you are.

Confidence is your first line of defense against bullying. It naturally buffers your self-esteem for personal attacks.

When you have confidence, you’re likely to tell your bullies where to stick it. Again, that’s a huge threat to their power. They may try to push you around one time. But it will be the only time they do it.

It pays to love yourself even when it seems others don’t.

Let Bullies be Your Jet Fuel to Unimaginable Heights

Instead of letting them bring you down, use your bullies as motivation to succeed. Let them be your drive to accomplish anything you see set to do.

Walk with your head held high, even amid taunts and attacks from bullies. Believe in yourself even when it seems no one else does. Be your own advocate, and be your own best friend.

Love and respect yourself. Do the things you enjoy the most. Stand up for your beliefs and convictions. Take care of yourself and stay true to your own heart.

Put yourself first. Be a little selfish and allow yourself to say no, whether anyone approves or not. Be your authentic self and be assertive and outspoken.

Keep company only with people who love you most and uplift you. Take charge of your own happiness and never depend on anyone else for it. Be proud of your successes, accomplishments, and accolades.

Do all of these things, and your bullies will be less likely to affect you.

The Best Revenge Against Bullies:

Using Bullying as a Motivator for Success and Happiness

I want to tell you that being the object of bullying does not mean that you’re a failure. It does not mean that you must give up.

Remember that bullies are not only cowards, they’re also liars. They only want to convince you that you are nothing.

And they want you to believe that because they are very much afraid that you WILL amount to something. So why not use them as motivation?

Here are ways that you can survive bullying and keep your self-esteem from tanking:

Practice and display any talents that you have.
Spend time with those you love and who love you the most.
Take care of yourself.
If a great opportunity comes your way, TAKE IT!
Do the things you enjoy the most.
Smile.

If you are a victim of bullying, there’s no better time to do whatever it takes to stay confident! Don’t let bullying devastate you; allow it to motivate you.

When they hate you, love yourself anyway. That’s how you get revenge. And you do it without even trying.

This post was all about the best revenge against bullies so that you can release any grudges and shift your focus from them to yourself.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Revenge on Bullies? Here are 17 Better Alternatives.

2. Things Bullies Hate: 9 Things That Drive Them Up the Wall

3. What Bullies Hate Most: 9 Things Bullies Despise

4. Jealousy and Bullying: 7 Proven Signs Your Bullies are Jealous

5. How to Love Yourself when Everyone Hates You

people pleaser trauma response psychology

People Pleaser Trauma Response: 5 Adverse Events that Cause It.

January 16, 2026December 16, 20254 Comments

‘Want to know about the people pleaser trauma response? People pleasing is mostly a trauma response. Here are five adverse life events that can lead to fawning, along with ways to break this self-sabotaging habit.

In this post, you will learn all about the people pleaser trauma response and the five adverse events that cause it.

Once you learn all about these crucial details, you will be able to not only recognize it in yourself if it’s something you struggle with, but you will also be able to narrow down where it came from.

This post is all about the people pleaser trauma response so that you can recognize it, know what causes it, and identify all the signs of it.

People Pleaser Trauma Response

People-pleasing caused by trauma is real. Why? Because people-pleasing behavior, in general, is usually caused by some past trauma.

Let’s find out why some folks people-please.

Psychological Conditioning

Another name for people-pleasing is fawning.

As I’ve mentioned in other posts, many victims of past bullying and abuse struggle with people-pleasing. Abusers have instilled the belief that, to win approval, you must bend over backwards for others. You must even tolerate shitty treatment from creeps.

So, they obey others’ demands because bullies have brainwashed them. And, not so much by words, but by their actions.

How? By retaliating and inflicting harm anytime the victim grew a spine and refused their demands. By doing this, bullies send the message that the next time you refuse to submit, they will punish you.

Moreover, they will often hurt you for daring to say “no!” Therefore, you fear asserting yourself. And you quickly adapt to having to cater to others to ensure your safety. Sadly, some victims linger on in the same situation for years on end.

It’s a hell of a way to live, and it’s akin to being held hostage. You feel as if you exist only for others’ purposes, agendas, pleasures, and entertainment, not your own.

People Pleaser Trauma Response:

Bullies don’t take no for an answer.

Bullies have a massive sense of entitlement. Moreover, they feel that they are superior to you. Therefore, they don’t take no for an answer, especially from a little peon like you.

They punish anyone who refuses their demands. And that punishment can be psychological or even physical. However, this doesn’t mean that you don’t continue to stand firm.

It’s better for others to hate you than for you to hate yourself because you caved into someone else’s demands. Realize that no one can make your time and your needs a priority but you!

The Difference Between Kindness and People-pleasing

Kindness means that you give of yourself because you want to. Those who are kind have healthy self-esteem and give out of love. However, they never give at their own expense.

However, a people-pleaser has low self-esteem. Their giving and generosity come from fear instead of love. They give because they feel no one will like them if they don’t. Or, they do it because they may suffer consequences if they don’t.

So, what are the disadvantages of people-pleasing behavior?

People Pleaser Trauma Response:

the disadvantages of People-pleasing

You end up feeling stressed, exhausted, miserable, and controlled!
You’re never free to pursue your own interests because people are constantly haranguing you for favors.
You have no time for yourself.
Your productivity declines because other people’s priorities constrain your time.
Others lose respect for you.
It erodes your confidence and self-esteem.
You feel anger and resentment, not only at the people who constantly use you, but toward yourself for allowing them to.

If nothing else, realize this. Most people have their own self-interests in mind. I want you to understand that you are the only person responsible for your needs. No one else can do that for you.

Charity always begins at home. Don’t run yourself ragged trying to take care of others. You must take care of yourself first.

Now, let’s learn the signs of people-pleasing you may see in yourself.

People Pleaser Trauma Response:

Signs You’re a People Pleaser

First, what is a people-pleaser? It is someone who always puts others before themselves. In other words, they put themselves last.

Many, especially targets of bullying, will have an overwhelming urge to people-please. This is not to say that they’re bad for doing it. However, it is unhealthy because what you are doing is not only counterproductive but also self-destructive.

To know the signs, you must distinguish between kindness and people-pleasing. Again, those who are kind give of themselves out of love. Their giving comes from the heart, not self-esteem issues or fear.

So, how do you know you’re a people-pleaser?

The fear of retaliation.
The desire to be liked and win friends.
To prove your worth.
To avoid conflict.
From insecurity.
You have low self-esteem.
Feeling like no one appreciates you.
Secretly having anger and resentment toward those who use and abuse you.
Being angry at yourself for allowing it.
Others may call you a “simp.”

5 Adverse Events that Cause People-Pleasing Behavior

1. Bullying or Past Bullying.

Bullying, whether at school or work, is traumatic. If you aren’t careful, it won’t take long, and before you know it, you’ll be walking on eggshells around everyone. And that’s what causes people-pleasing behavior.

In this situation, you aren’t trying to get others to like you. You’re trying to keep them off your back. Therefore, you fawn to keep them happy. But it only produces the opposite results. Others who are evil will notice it and only exploit it.

2. People pleaser Trauma Response:

Growing Up with Child Abuse.

Child abuse is another adverse event that causes people-pleaser behavior. Children who live in abusive homes learn quickly that to stay off an abusive family’s radar, they must fawn.

In other words, they must do everything humanly possible to make the abuser happy. Why? Because they know that if they don’t, there will be hell to pay.

They develop survival habits that are normalized. And by the time these kids reach adulthood, they become a way of life.

Sadly, through their people-pleasing behavior, they only attract more abusers. And they end up a victim of bullying for life. Understand that bullies and abusers look for a trauma response. It’s how they select their victims.

3. Spousal Abuse.

Spousal abuse is so potent. Oftentimes, a person who marries an abuser is highly confident at first. However, it doesn’t take long before domestic abuse whittles their self-esteem down to nothing.

Once your self-esteem is gone, you’ll bend yourself into a pretzel to please your abusive partner. And because trying to please them rewards their behavior, they’ll only treat you worse.

4. People Pleaser Trauma Response:

Not Knowing Any Better.

You may genuinely believe that you’re being kind when, in fact, you may be overdoing the pleasantries. And the next thing you know, others are treating you like a doormat, and you don’t understand why.

You may have been raised to treat everyone as you would want to be treated. However, your guardians may not have taught you that some will take advantage of it. Therefore, you people-please without realizing it.

Again, people-pleaser behavior is a sign of trauma. And signs of trauma are what abusers look for in potential victims.

5. Emotional gaslighting.

Bullies and abusers will use emotional gaslighting when you dare to defend yourself. Understand that they do this to drag you back under their power.

Therefore, if you have a habit of people-pleasing and you begin defending yourself because you’ve grown tired of taking bullshit, look for others to gaslight you.

It’s what happens when you first begin standing up for yourself.

Here’s how to get rid of the people pleaser trauma response:

1. Establish boundaries

When you have no boundaries, others will have no respect for you. Pleasers have no boundaries. Therefore, others quickly notice it and exploit it.

Setting boundaries may feel weird at first. However, it is a must if you want to take back control of your life. Why? Because setting boundaries shows that you have self-respect.

It also shows that you’re not afraid to prioritize your needs, even if it makes others angry. Realize that you teach others how to treat you. And how you treat yourself depends on how you allow others to treat you.

I can’t stress this enough: trauma responses attract bullying and abuse.

2. Stop apologizing

From the time we’re toddlers, our parents teach us to apologize when we do something wrong. Although this is a good thing, overdoing it can backfire.

Anytime you make unnecessary apologies, you’re taking responsibility for things that aren’t your fault. And when you give unsavory characters undeserved apologies, you take accountability for their deplorable behavior.

In the end, it only makes you a bigger target.

But when you refuse to apologize when you don’t need to, you show greater self-esteem. Moreover, you show greater power and display more dignity and integrity. Therefore, you instantly become less of a victim.

So, stop giving needless apologies. Realize that this overwhelming urge to over-apologize is only a knee-jerk reaction to extreme fear. Bullies and abusers can sniff fear from miles away.

3. How to Get Rid of The People Pleaser Trauma Response:

Say no.

The word no yields more power than any other word in the English language. On the other hand, the word yes holds none whatsoever.

Saying no is risky. However, saying yes to bullies won’t keep them from harming you. It may hold them off for the time being, but it won’t keep the bullies away forever. They always come back for more later.

Realize that saying yes to some, especially bullies, means saying no to yourself. So, never be afraid to say no and mean it.

4. Practice self-care

Self-care isn’t selfish. It’s essential to your physical and mental well-being. Nobody else will do it for you. Therefore, it’s up to you to take care of yourself, even if others disagree.

Understand that if you don’t begin looking out for number one, you’ll only continue playing second fiddle to others. Or worse, you might end up coming in last!

The only one you should come second to is God! Especially around bullies and others who don’t value you.

So, continue to do you. Others may not like it, but that’s their problem, not yours.

5. How to Get rid of the people pleaser trauma Response:

Make your needs a priority

You can’t pour from an empty cup. If you make your needs a priority, you’ll have more to give to others. Always remember that.

Realize that you don’t need to kiss ass, eat shit, and lick boots to prove your worth or ensure your safety. When you tend to people-please, you only bring more bullying and abuse into your life. Why? Because evil characters look for signs of trauma in potential victims

It isn’t your fault. However, you must still learn how to ward off bullies and attract healthy people. Standing up for yourself is how you do it.

This post is all about the people pleaser trauma response so that you can know where it comes from and how to break the bad habits that attract bullying and mistreatment.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Bullying and Trauma

2. People Pleaser Test: 4 Signs You’re a People-Pleaser

3. Over Apologizing Trauma Response: 9 Easy Ways to Overcome It

4. Bully Proof: 7 Do’s and Don’ts for Victims of Bullying\

5. The Perfect Victim: 9 Traits Bullies Look for in Potential Targets

Manipulators: 8 Ways They Manipulate

January 13, 2026December 13, 202561 Comments

Want to know about manipulators and how they operate? Here’s everything you need to know.

Manipulators are everywhere, at school, in the workplace, and even in the home. Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about manipulators and the tactics they use to get what they want.

Once you learn all about these crucial details, you will be better able to spot them and protect yourself.

This post is all about manipulators so that you can recognize when you’re being taken for a sucker and drop them like they’re hot.

Manipulators

So, why do people resort to manipulation? They do it because they feel powerless inside. They don’t have the guts to come out and ask for what they want.

Moreover, they feel they can’t get their needs met any other way. Therefore, they must resort to indirect means and trickery to get their needs and wants met.

There are many ways people, especially bullies, manipulate. Here are all the tactics they use to get what they want from you.

1. Guilt Trips

Manipulators will make you feel guilty when you don’t let them have their way. And they will continue to violate your boundaries.

If you “dare” to stand up to them, they’ll become offended and angry. They will try to make you believe you are the bad guy.

Many times when I was young, others tried to constantly manipulate me. They told me that if I didn’t do what they wanted, I wasn’t a good person. Or they would imply that I wasn’t a team player.

They would accuse me of being selfish, stingy, or greedy. The other person would always say things that made me feel rotten.

Manipulators may also attempt to make you feel obligated somehow. They may refer to something they did for you and imply that you now owe them.

For example, if a partner asks a girl for sex and she tells them she’s not ready to take that step yet, the partner will then say something to the tune of, “I just took you out to a five-course dinner and treated you to a great movie…” Blah-b-blah.

Let’s be clear, you don’t owe them anything, especially if it’s a date trying to get in your pants. The same goes if someone is trying to talk you into joining them in doing something illegal.

If something doesn’t feel right and you get the feeling you’re better off not going along, trust your instincts. And say no, then tell them to either beat it or take you home right then!

2. Tactics of Manipulators:

Pretending not to understand

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” We have all heard that line many times. Manipulators will claim they don’t understand. However, they know darn well what you’re saying, but don’t want to.

Do not fall for this! Either walk away, or tell the person, “Don’t give me that crap. You know exactly what I’m talking about.” Then, walk away.

3. Being friendly only when they expect something in return

Every single one of us has dealt with those types- you know the ones. You never hear from these people. Moreover, they may even treat you coldly when they see you out and about.

Then, suddenly, magically, out of the blue, they call you up or start being friendly. Next, they ask you for a favor, some help with a problem they are dealing with. Or maybe they need a little cash.

And so, you help the person, and once they’ve gotten what they wanted, it’s back to true blue. They disappear or go back to treating you like trash.

You must see this person for who they are. And this creep is nothing but a user. They’re one of many manipulators who get over on you and many others.

Ditch this person because they will only drain you. You don’t need them in your life.

4. Tactics of Manipulators:

The silent treatment

This is one of the most common tactics manipulators use. And they do it to exploit the natural and extreme human need for social acceptance and community.

Let’s face it. We are all hardwired for social connection. Furthermore, it’s natural to go silent on someone when they’ve done us wrong.

However, the silent treatment can also be abused by manipulators when they don’t get their way, and can be damaging to the target when used against them.

If a bully or anyone else tries to get you to do something you don’t want to do, no law says that you have to do it. And how you protect yourself against this childish behavior is to not care about it. Instead, mirror it back to them.

In other words, when someone gives you the silent treatment, you give it back to them. Always remember that two can play that game!

5. Acting as if an agreement has been made when there’s been no agreement at all

This can be the most infuriating. These creeps will often go ahead with their plans before you’ve agreed. Or they’ll tell you something like, “Remember? We agreed to so-and-so last week,” knowing darn well you never agreed to anything.

Manipulators will try to put words in your mouth to strong-arm you into giving in. They won’t even stop to think about how you feel about it. Why? Because they don’t care.

Don’t go along with this. Give this person their walking papers. Pronto!

6. Tactics of Manipulators:

Predicting negative outcomes to your plans

Anytime you have plans, there will be those who will try to break your confidence. And they will do it by giving you words of discouragement.

For example, if you plan to record a CD, they might say things like, “I’m not trying to disappoint you, but chances are your CD will never chart.” Or “I hate to say this, but it’s no guarantee a producer will ever sign you to a record deal.”

Moreover, if you’re planning to publish a book, someone might ask you, “How do you know your book will even sell?” Or they might ask, “Do you really think you’re that good a writer? You need to be honest with yourself.”

They may also ridicule and belittle your goals and dreams. They do this to make your dreams seem foolish or something to be ashamed of. And sadly, these kinds of tactics work.

They’re even more effective when manipulators use them in front of an audience.

Trust me, I had people do the same to me, but it never discouraged me. It only ticked me off and made me double down on my plans to publish my books. And the best part is, I finally did it!

I advise you to do the same. If a shady character tries to discourage you from pursuing your plans, goals, and dreams, keep going.

Realize that the reason people discourage you is that they’re so afraid that you might succeed. In fact, the very possibility of you succeeding scares them to death!

Why? Because your success would force these jerks to take a long look at themselves and their own pathetic lives. Moreover, it just might put you ahead of them.

7. Tactics of Manipulators:

Distracting you from your goals

If jealous manipulators know that you’re striving toward a goal, they will deliberately try to distract you. Again, the reason they do this is that, deep down, they’re afraid that you might succeed. Then you will force them to compare your life to theirs.

Point blank, these people want so badly for you to fail. And they want you to stay on the same level as them. Why? So they won’t be left alone in the gutter, feeling so bad about themselves.

For example, people might be real sneaky about it. They may begin inviting you to parties or trying to get you drunk.

When they do this, they can claim that they only want you to have a good time instead of sitting at home studying all the time. Or they may be more overt and interrupt you while you’re working.

Or, they may play loud music while you’re trying to concentrate. Again, these people are scared to death of your success. And they will very slyly put out all the stops to distract your attention. So, beware.

How you combat this is by politely declining any invitations. Or, you can go to a place where you can work quietly and not be interrupted or distracted.

8. Tactics of Manipulators:

Isolating you.

Abusive partners

This is, perhaps, one of the worst manipulation tactics. And it happens often in abusive marriages and relationships.

The person may try to keep you away from caring family and friends. Therefore, you must see the reasons they do it.

One reason is to control the narrative. They want to make sure your loved ones don’t give you information that could put them in danger. For instance, your family members may see right through your partner.

As a result, they may tell you that they aren’t good for you and that you should drop them. Moreover, your partner may want to keep you all to themselves. However, you must understand that this isn’t normal and should be seen as a red flag.

Bullies

If your manipulators are bullies, they may turn your friends against you. They may also make it difficult for you to make new friends.

Understand that they do this to control your social life. If they can ruin your reputation and turn everyone against you, they can make you lonely. Moreover, they can cut off any support you might otherwise receive.

And it’s all to maintain power over your life.

Tactics of Manipulators:

in conclusion

These are only a few tactics manipulators use, but they are the most common. Other tactics include gaslighting, physical abuse, and fear.

Your best defense against them is knowledge. When you know their tactics and personalities, you can better predict what they’ll do. Then you can block their attempts to control you.

With knowledge comes empowerment.

Here’s a brief summary of what we just covered:

Guilt trips
Pretending not to understand
Being friendly only when they expect something from you.
Giving you the silent treatment
Acting as if an agreement has been made when you haven’t agreed to anything.
Predicting negative outcomes to your plans.
Distracting you from your goals.
Isolating you.

This post was all about manipulators and the tactics they use so that you can use what you’ve learned to predict their next move and outflank them.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Sub-types of Bullies: 7 Personalities of Bullies

2. What Bullies Hate Most: 9 Things Bullies Despise

3. Gaslighting Examples: 11 Notable Tactics Gaslighters Use

4. Bullying Tactics: 9 Subtle Moves Bullies Use to Avoid Detection

5. Psychological Abuse Tactics: 9 Mind Games Seasoned Bullies Use

Bullying and The Human Stress Response

January 9, 2026December 7, 20252 Comments

‘Want to know about bullying and the human stress response? Here’s everything you need to know.

Bullying and the Human Stress Response go hand in hand. Bullying automatically activates this response in victims.

Whenever bullies accost their target, their body instinctively goes into survival mode. Therefore, the automatic response is either to fight or flee.

But what happens when their bodies stay in that state due to long-term bullying?

In this post, you will learn all about bullying and the human stress response. You will also learn what happens when a person stays in survival mode for longer than usual.

Once you learn all about these crucial details, you will become more proactive in protecting yourself from bullying.

This post is all about the human stress response, so you will understand the mechanisms by which bullying affects the brain and the sympathetic nervous system.

Bullying and the Human stress Response

Bullying automatically throws the victim’s body into survival mode. We no longer fight saber-toothed tigers and woolly mammoths to survive. However, our bodies don’t know the difference.

Therefore, bullying activates the same human survival instinct that wild animals did during prehistoric times. When bullies approach you, your bloodstream floods itself with adrenaline.

This is useful in emergencies because it lets you run faster from a pack of wolves. Moreover, it gives you the strength that you wouldn’t usually have. This is the stamina you need to fight off people who want to harm or kill you.

It’s all a part of the survival instinct that all humans have. However, this burst of adrenaline is only meant to be temporary and subsides once the danger has passed.

Therefore, if you live on this adrenaline for too long, it can have devastating consequences.

the effects of Long-term bullying on the sympathetic nervous system.

A certain amount of stress is healthy because it helps us to get things done. However, too much stress for too long can cause significant damage.

According to the Cleveland Clinic website, “Your sympathetic nervous system is a network of nerves that helps your body activate its ‘fight-or-flight’ response. This system’s activity increases when you’re stressed. It also kicks in when you’re in danger or physically active.

Its effects include increasing your heart rate and breathing ability, improving your eyesight, and slowing down processes like digestion.”( https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/body/23262-sympathetic-nervous-system-sns-fight-or-flight#:~:text=Your%20sympathetic%20nervous%20system%20is%20best%20known%20for%20its%20role,your%20get%20out%20of%20danger. )

Bullying and the Human Stress Response:

What happens when you live in survival mode for too long?

The effects are devastating! After so long, bullying can screw up the target’s Sympathetic Nervous System. It can cause confusion and emotional numbness.

Moreover, the constant bullying puts your fight-or-flight response into overdrive. After bullies have bullied you for so long, it causes adverse changes in your brain.

It causes your thinking ability to decline. Also, your brain rewires itself to expect a hostile environment. In other words, it will create new neural pathways to support this.

When you live in survival mode, the logical part of your brain automatically shuts down. Therefore, the primal part of your brain takes over.

What are the most common outcomes?

1. If people bully you in school, your grades fall, and class performance suffers.

As we all should know, bullying can have a devastating effect on grades and class performance. Here’s how:

Anytime you are a victim of bullying, you are on constant alert for an attack. It feels as if you have a target on your back and you must grow eyes in the back of your head. In other words, you become hyper-vigilant.

When you must focus so much on protecting yourself, safety takes priority over studying lessons. How can one concentrate on schoolwork? You can’t study when people constantly bombard you with threats, taunts, name-calling, and physical violence.

How can you learn effectively when you’re stuck in never-ending fight-or-flight mode? It’s almost impossible! I tell you this because it happened to me.

Therefore, is it any wonder that the majority of victims have such poor grades?

2. Bullying and The Human Stress Response:

Learned helplessness.

When you suffer bullying, many people repeatedly tell you that you’ll never amount to anything. After hearing the same crap repeatedly for so long, you begin to believe it yourself.

Therefore, a condition, known as “Learned Helplessness,” develops. And, soon, you stop trying altogether.

Bullying can affect ALL areas of your life. Not only social, but also academic and achievements.

3. Bullying stunts victims’ social development.

The bullied brain has difficulty developing properly. Social intelligence may not keep you from becoming a victim of bullying. However, it will lessen your chances of it.

Social intelligence always has, and always will, supersede book smarts. It will get you much further than college degrees, awards, and credentials alone.

Moreover, it is the reason high school dropouts have become millionaires. And it is also why many college graduates have ended up flipping burgers at McDonald’s.

Social intelligence is THE most important quality you can have. It’s the highest-paid skill and most important asset in the entire universe.

But, sadly, most victims have had their confidence and charisma bullied out of them.

4. Bullying and the Human Stress Response:

Social withdrawal.

However, if you suffer bullying, the abuse can batter your self-esteem into oblivion. And, to cope with it, you may withdraw from the rest of the world.

When you’ve been bullied for so long, you become deathly afraid of other people. Also, you come to believe that you’re inferior to everyone else.

Therefore, you’re afraid to talk, scared to mingle, and fearful of social situations. You retreat into yourself and live inside your own head.

You may create a fantasy world where you feel safe, wanted, and loved. It’s a world of imaginary people who accept you. As a result, you shut out the “real world” and live in this fantasy world- this safe haven you’ve created.

This is not good because, when this happens, you stop watching people and the world around you. As a result, you stop learning the social graces and nuances that you need to know to nurture relationships and create a good life for yourself.

5. You become socially awkward.

In other words, you become too quiet, shy, and reserved.

You look right through people instead of smiling and saying hello. You become sullen and spaced out instead of happy, upbeat, and engaging.

Also, you feel numb instead of the emotions you should feel at different times.

Therefore, it stunts your social development!

6. Other negative outcomes you may face.

You will have trouble making your own choices. Why? Because you won’t trust yourself to make the right decisions for your life, especially if you are a child.

Relentless bullying can cause children to lose the ability to discern abuse when they experience it. They may make wrong choices to reach safety. This usually happens due to changes in their brains.

Bullying can also affect emotional control. You may suffer loss of cognitive abilities and a severely diminished ability to control emotions. This is why victims often snap and do irrational things when the pressure builds to the breaking point.

This happens especially with children. Because their brains are still developing, kids are more likely to have defects in emotional regulation.

Bullying and the Human Stress Response:

Flowers Can’t Grow and Bloom Without Sunlight

Bullying causes self-doubt. And self-doubt is the killer of dreams. It comes when a person is consistently showered with toxicity.

Toxicity comes from toxic people- bullies and abusers. When all a person gets is insults and abuse for a long time, they become exhausted. And any positivity they once had is slowly drained from them until they’re totally depleted of it.

Eventually, if you aren’t careful, you’ll start seeing yourself through the eyes of your bullies. And you’ll give up. And, when others look at you, they will see a person who’s lackluster and slow.

When you’re a target of bullying, you’re like a flower that gets nothing but constant rain. The flower doesn’t grow and develop properly.

The consistent abuse zaps your energy and keeps you hyper-vigilant and on guard 24/7- waiting for the other shoe to drop.

You lose your happiness, confidence, pride, will, and purpose in life. In essence, your bullies take away your good qualities and turn you into a person you don’t even recognize anymore.

This is no way to live.

So, what can you do?

Never accept the bullshit bullies try to cram down your throat. I want you to realize that they don’t know you at all. They may claim they know you more than you know yourself.

The truth is, nobody can possibly know you like you know yourself. And anyone who tells you otherwise is lying through their teeth.

1. Bullying and The Human Stress Response:

Refuse to accept their definition of you.

Understand that bullies and abusers are miserable people who want you to be as miserable as they are. Therefore, stay away from those people. They aren’t worth your time or energy.

Remember that there’s always hope. You’re worth much more than what your bullies say you are. And you’re worth more than you may think you are.

Never let bullies destroy the things inside you that matter the most. That is your self-love, self-respect, confidence, and sense of pride. Those things are yours and not for anyone else to have!

2. Remove yourself from the environment if possible.

Focus on self-care. If at all possible, remove yourself from the bullying environment. Go to a new place where you can grow and flourish.

Transfer to a place where you can make friends. Be your own best friend. Be your own hero. And be your own sunlight!

Keep company with people who let you shine and let the sun shine on you!

Remember that a plant cannot grow in a hostile environment with no sunlight or water. And neither can human beings flourish in fight-or-flight mode.

Constant survival mode is no way to live.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

This post is all about bullying and the human stress response so that you will be more aware of the outcomes and start defending yourself now.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. The Bullied Brain: 7 Ways Bullying Affects Mental Health

2. Fight Flight Freeze Fawn: 4 Stress Responses of Bullying Victims

3. Bullying Survival Mode: 5 Things Victims of Bullying Do Wrong

4. Bullying and the Fight-or-Flight Response

5. Effects of Bullying on the Victim: 13 Symptoms of Bullied People

Signs Verbal Abuse will Turn Physical

January 6, 2026December 7, 20258 Comments

‘Want to know all the signs verbal abuse will turn physical? Here are all the indicators you need to know.

There are always signs that verbal abuse will turn physical. Therefore, in this post, you will learn what those signs are so that you can act beforehand.

Once you learn all these indicators, you will be better prepared to defend yourself when a bully raises a hand to you.

This post is all about the signs verbal abuse will turn physical, so that if you’re being verbally bullied, you will be prepared to defend yourself. And if you’re in an abusive relationship, you can start planning your exit strategy now.

Signs Verbal Abuse will Turn Physical

You would be surprised at how quickly and easily a bully (or any abuser, for that matter) can change from letting their mouths do the talking to letting their fists and feet speak for them.

No one should ever tolerate verbal abuse. However, many do put up with it and don’t realize that words can turn into physical blows.

here’s a scenario you’ll probably recognize

Bullying always escalates. Always. For instance, bullies have been verbally abusing you for quite some time. You remember how they began with subtle digs and zingers. Next, you noticed that they progressed to openly screaming at you and cursing you out like a dog.

They called you ugly names and accused you of things you are not guilty of. They probably shouted you down, everything you even looked like you were going to speak.

And now, they are making threats of violence against you. You’ve begun to feel afraid because you’re not sure if they mean it or not. Therefore, you don’t know when the bullying will become physical and what they’ll do to you when it does.

Understand that your bullies are still pushing your boundaries. Little by little, they up the ante to test you and figure out how you’ll react. In other words, they are seeing what you’ll let them get away with.

Therefore, they always start small. And they ever so gradually turn it up in teeny tiny increments. Bullies do this to condition you to take worse abuse. And sometimes, you don’t even know they’re doing it.

So, how do you know when the verbal bullying you suffer is about to become physical? Here’s how:

1. Signs Verbal Abuse will Turn Physical:

they invade your personal space

You can’t mistake this body language. When bullies invade your space, it’s a surefire sign that things are about to get physical. They get a little too close. They’ll follow close behind you as you’re walking down the hallway or street.

They may stand too close to you in the lunch line or while you’re punching the time clock. They may even step in front of you and block you from going any further.

Understand that body language speaks louder than words ever will. The verbal attacks were only a precursor. If nothing else, know this! Anytime a bully gets too close to you, it means they want to strike you.

Therefore, they are making sure that you are within their reach so that they can. Moreover, they are experimenting with you to gauge your response.

If someone gets in your face, your first response should be to knock the living hell out of them.

In this case, offense is the best defense. In other words, don’t even give them a chance to hit you first. Why? Because the first strike just might be the one that maims or kills you.

Therefore, to prevent a possible physical attack, the time to act is now! You must tell them in no uncertain terms to back off. And if they don’t, it’s time to strike first.

Yes! You heard me correctly. I’m not beyond hauling off and punching someone in the nose if they get in my face and refuse to back off.

However, be aware that you may be in a place where punching a bully isn’t suitable. You may be working at your job or studying in class.

In lieu of fighting, I recommend that you look the bully dead in the eye. And give the hardest glare you can muster. Then tell them in a low, growling voice to knock it off. Keep in mind that your nonverbal communication (your body language) must match what you say.

Keep glaring at them, without blinking, until they avert their eyes. Make sure you’re standing absolutely still and facing them in a power pose. (More on power poses later) The goal here is to put the fear of God in the bully.

2. Signs Verbal Abuse will Turn Physical:

they lay claim to your things and your territory

Bullies may sit at your desk. They may also pick up your belongings or lean on your car. Understand that, by touching your belongings, bullies are laying claim to what is yours. This is another sign of hostility.

This is the time to assert yourself firmly. Tell them to keep their slimy, grimy paws off your stuff! Bear in mind that messing with your belongings or destroying them is also considered to be physical bullying.

However, be forewarned that most bullies will see this as a challenge. And they will dare you to do something about it.

In this case, don’t be afraid to throw up your dukes. It’s your stuff they’re messing with, and they’re doing it to test you and see how far they can push you! So, don’t fail!

But, just as I mentioned earlier, if you use fisticuffs, make sure the time, place, and conditions are as close to right as possible. If not, do what I suggested at the end of the last section.

3. they will begin assaulting you and making it look like an accident

I call this borderline physical abuse.

Bullies will begin their physical assaults through“accidental” shoves, pushes, and bumps. They may do things “accidentally on purpose.”

For instance, they may“accidentally” run or bump into you in the hallway or parking lot. They might “accidentally” trip you or knock you down.

Or they’ll “accidentally” knock things out of your hands. They will say, “Oh, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to (trip, shove, run into you, etc.).

And they’ll say it knowing damn well they did it deliberately. Also, you’ll know it too.

Moreover, they do it, thinking that maybe, just maybe, you won’t notice that it’s escalating. After all, accidents happen all the time. No harm, no foul. Right?

The problem is that if bullies get away with these types of games, they’ll only escalate it until it gets out of control. And once bullying gets out of control, it’s almost impossible to stop or even slow down.

Again, it’s time to throw up those dukes! Remember not to doubt yourself and what you know and feel. And you always know when something is done on purpose. You can sense these kinds of things.

Signs Verbal Abuse will Turn Physical: Like any other form of abuse, Bullying will only get worse if you don’t act.

Understand that bullying, or any form of abuse, always- always gets worse if you let it slide. Because it’s a dark part of human nature to push, push, and push further to see how far one can go.

Again, tune into your body and intuition. In other words, listen to your gut. Why? Because your gut will tell you if what the person did to you was deliberate or an accident.

If your senses tell you they did it on purpose, call it out and ask them to stop it right away. If that doesn’t work and the bully keeps it up, it might be time to throw down. But, whatever you do, put a stop to it because it’ll only get worse if you don’t.

4. They begin threatening physical violence.

This is a surefire sign that verbal bullying is about to escalate to fists. If a bully starts threatening to “kick your butt,” believe them. Take it seriously. And be prepared to defend yourself. Don’t back down and don’t turn your back on them. Why?

Because bullies don’t fight fair, they will attack you from behind the minute you turn your back and walk away.

And if they get in your face, they are violating your personal space. Moreover, it means that they want to get close enough to attack physically. So, don’t hesitate to punch their lights out.

Never doubt what you feel. Trust it!

Many victims of bullying hesitate to act because they don’t trust their instincts. They question their own instincts. “Is he really about to attack me, or is he only trying to scare me?”

The trick is to trust your gut. It picks up on the other person’s energy. If your gut tells you that the person wants to hit you, it is probably right.

Signs Verbal Bullying will Turn Physical:

In conclusion

To defend yourself, you must pay attention and trust your instincts. Look for these signs. And if you see them, you must do whatever it takes to contain the threat. And if that means hitting first, then do it.

With knowledge comes empowerment.

This post is all about the signs Verbal bullying will Turn PHYSICAL so that you can be ready for when the bully attacks you.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Verbal Bullying

2. Physical Bullying Information: 5 Must-Know Secrets Bullies Don’t Want You to Know

3. How to Deal with Physical Bullies

4. Non Verbal Bullying: Hostile Body Language Head to Toe

5. Examples of Non Verbal Bullying

what doesn't work with bullies in school

What Doesn’t Work with Bullies: 10 Reactions to Stop Right Now

January 2, 2026December 6, 20258 Comments

‘Want to know what doesn’t work with bullies? Here are all the responses you need to know that only produce the opposite of what you hope for.

Specific responses never work with bullies. And you must know what they are to avoid using them and making yourself an even bigger target.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn what doesn’t work with bullies so you can avoid them more easily and respond more effectively.

Once you learn these vital tips, you will be able to respond to bullying more effectively.

This post is all about what doesn’t work with bullies, so you’ll know how to avoid responding.

What doesn’t work with Bullies

Some responses and reactions work, and some don’t. Some responses will prompt bullies to back off. However, others will only encourage them to continue and even escalate their harassment.

So, what doesn’t work with bullies? Here’s a list of ways to avoid responding at all costs.

1. Ignoring them.

I’m sure you’ve had many people tell you to ignore the bullies when they bully you. This is just another classic, worn-out piece of bad advice.

I got that lousy advice, too. And I learned the hard way – it doesn’t work. Period. Full stop! It never works.

Bullies will only become angry when you ignore them. And they will escalate the bullying. Moreover, they will mistake your ignoring them for fear.

If a bully gets in your face, how do you ignore that? It’s impossible.

You might think that the best way to handle it is to put your hand up and walk around the bully. This isn’t necessarily a bad response.

However, how do you know the bully won’t come after you and attack you from behind? When people tell you to ignore the bully, what they really mean is one or more of three things:

They don’t want to hear about it, don’t want to deal with it, or don’t have any answers themselves.

Therefore, keep calling it out. And keep setting boundaries.

2. What Doesn’t work with Bullies:

Asking them why.

Many victims mistakenly ask their bullies why. And it’s because they haven’t been taught more effective responses.

“Why are you doing this to me?”
“Why me?”
“What did I ever do to you?”

These questions are pointless. Why? Because, by asking these types of questions, you’re only reinforcing your role as a victim.

A bully will never answer those questions. And it’s because they either can’t or won’t answer them. Why would they tell you?

Remember that part of the bully’s power is to keep you confused. And believe me, their silence on it speaks just as loudly as their words. They love to keep you guessing and trying to rack your brain.

That alone is power in and of itself. If bullies can keep you wondering, they can continue the behavior. And they can do it without you catching on that they are the ones with the problem and not you.

Therefore, it’s best to look up articles and books on bullying to get the answers to your questions. You’ll get much better answers from these sources than you ever will from your bullies.

What Doesn’t Work with Bullies:

Why keeping you confused is half their power.

Again, keeping you bewildered is a power all its own. Why? Because when you’re confused, you can’t think clearly. And if you can’t think clearly, you are less likely to figure out what to do about it.

Understand that bullies will never relinquish their power. Never! To tell you why they bully you would be like giving secrets to the enemy. To be honest about what they hate about you would be like giving their power away to you, and they’ll be damned if they ever!

Therefore, I want you to know that there’s nothing wrong with you. You must know in your heart that you never did anything to deserve brutal treatment.

To take back your power, you must realize that they are the mentally impaired ones. They are the ones with the problem, and they are responsible for their behavior.

Instead of focusing your attention on finding out why your bullies are giving you problems, focus on self-care.

Instead of asking, “Why me?” ask, “What can I do to take care of myself?” Ask “What can I do to remove myself from the situation and the toxic environment?”

Consider your options and weigh each carefully. Then quietly begin making plans to get out of there as soon and as safely as possible.

3. I-Responses.

Instead, respond with a You-Response. For example, tell them, “You chose that behavior, I didn’t.” Or, you can say, “You’re such an asshole.”

Whatever you do, keep your response away from yourself. Always say, “You are the problem,” or “You chose to be a jerk.” Choose any response that points to the bully and not at you.

4. What Doesn’t Work with Bullies:

Begging.

When you beg a bully not to hurt you, it only makes you look weaker. Moreover, when you beg, bullies get a rush of power. Bullies love it when you beg. Therefore, don’t give them the satisfaction.

More importantly, it doesn’t work. It only makes bullies want to harm you more. Why? Because it makes you seem like a loser.

Instead of begging, look the bully in the eye and firmly tell them to back the hell off. And if they don’t, you may have to put up your fists. Begging comes from a position of weakness. So, you must speak from a position of strength.

5. Apologizing.

Apologizing to bullies is a trauma response. So, it isn’t your fault.

Apologizing is appropriate when a situation warrants it. A sincere apology to someone you’ve hurt shows good character and integrity. It brings about healing and reopens communication between you and those you’ve wronged.

But what if the circumstances do not need one? Apologies can backfire when you offer them needlessly to people who don’t deserve them.

You may say “I’m sorry” before you even have time to think. It’s an automatic response. So, when you catch yourself about to say “sorry,” Stop for a moment.

Assess the situation and the person you’re apologizing to.

NEVER apologize to a bully. Bullies will only see it as weakness. Understand that you can never appease a bully.

Giving bullies undeserved apologies makes you take accountability for their deplorable behavior. So, instead of apologizing. Tell them, “You’ll get over it,” and walk away.

In fact, here’s what you do before apologizing to a bully.

What Doesn’t Work With Bullies:

Ask yourself these questions:

Doesn’t this warrant an apology?
Is this person someone I need to apologize to?
Is this my fault?
Did I have any control over this?
Am I responsible for someone else’s behavior other than my own?

If the answers are no, then save your apology for a person who deserves it and a situation that warrants it.

Do these people bully and abuse me?
Do they gaslight me when I defend myself or when I assert my needs and wants?
Have they yelled at me, insulted me, or ridiculed me when I’m having fun and just being myself?
Do they bully me more intensely when I express my own thoughts and opinions?
Do they punish me for feeling angry or sad emotions?
And, do they ridicule me for asking for help?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then you don’t have to apologize. So, don’t!

I can’t stress this enough. When you offer apologies to bullies, you are wandering into people-pleasing territory. Also, your apologies will eventually lose their meaning when used too much for too long.

Moreover, they can weaken you in the eyes of predatory people. You will become the victim of people who wish to take advantage of you for their own selfish and sick pleasure and gain.

Why? Because you’re sorry for simply existing and taking up space.

What Doesn’t work with Bullies:

What you should say instead of apologizing.

If a bully or abuser is trying to force you to apologize for something you know isn’t your fault, is beyond your control, or something that doesn’t need an apology, these are powerful responses.

You’ll get over it.
You’ll be alright.
By the end of the day, this won’t even matter.
It’s no big deal.
This isn’t a crisis. Everything’s going to be okay.

Therefore, understand that in those circumstances, you are not inconveniencing anyone or being a bother. Realize that your needs are just as important as everyone else’s.

This trauma response comes from a bullied brain. In other words, after people have bullied you for so long, you over-apologize because you’re afraid of being bullied again. But it can only bring more bullying because people will use it against you.

6. Explaining.

Explaining is a trap. Why? Because most things don’t need an explanation. Yet bullies are good at getting their victims to explain things that don’t need explaining.

Worst of all, victims of bullying are unsure how not to get sucked into needlessly explaining themselves. Therefore, they end up wasting their breath on people who aren’t worthy of their time or consideration.

As a result, they end up making themselves even bigger targets and get stuck in endless cycles of having to explain their every move.

This can become exhausting and, not to mention, dis-empowering! Therefore, you must realize that this is just another bullying tactic.

What Doesn’t Work with Bullies:

Why Bullies Bait you into the Explaining Trap.

To throw you off-balance
To gather ammunition with which to fire back at you later
And to get you emotional.

So, how do you respond to this tactic intelligently and with strength? You respond by giving them a dismissive look, then walking away. Sometimes, silence speaks the loudest.

7. Being Nice.

Sweet talk never works with bullies. Too much sugar is never good because it not only eats away at your teeth, but it also eats away at your self-esteem and your life.

In a world full of evil people, being too nice means having no backbone or boundaries. Therefore, bullies will only see your kindness as a sign of being a fool. And don’t think they won’t find ways to exploit it.

With bullies, you must grow a pair and stand up to shabby treatment. It’s the only way you will ever get through to them.

8. A soft “No”.

When you say no to bullies, you must give them a hard no, never a soft one. A soft no is a no that is gentler and includes an explanation (see number six). It has no teeth. Therefore, bullies will only steamroll right over it.

On the other hand, a hard no is a firm, point-blank refusal. It has strength behind it. For instance, you can say, “No,” “Nope!” or “Absolutely not!” Then walk away.

Responses to bullies should always be firm.

9. What Doesn’t Work with Bullies:

Submitting and trying to appease them.

Anytime you submit just to appease them and make them go away, you are rewarding their behavior. In other words, you’re giving them what they want. And, if you give them what they want, what makes you think they won’t come back for more?

You cannot submit your way out of being bullied. And you cannot appease a bully. Moreover, bullies don’t understand politeness or diplomacy; they only understand strength. These are facts you must know right now!

10. Pandering

I’ve seen so many bullied targets- even people who aren’t victims pander- or, in laymen terms, suck up. Bullies can be intimidating, even downright threatening, no doubt.

Anytime someone feels threatened, their first instinct is to do whatever it takes to quell the danger. That, I understand entirely.

But, unless they threaten your life, it isn’t a good idea to pander to bullies. Why? Because it wouldn’t change anything. You only give away more of your power by bowing down and kissing their feet.

As a result, you’ll end up feeling even worse about yourself than you did before.

Pandering is for pansies. So, think for yourself and start standing up to anyone who violates your boundaries. They may bully you harder at first. You may have to fight harder and for longer to assert yourself.

But if you stick to it, they will go away sooner or later. And you’ll feel better about yourself.

What Doesn’t Work with Bullies:

In conclusion

To know how to respond means learning how not to respond. Therefore, avoid these reactions, and you will become bully-proof and live in peace. I promise you.

This post was all about what doesn’t work with bullies so that you can stand strong, make them leave you alone, and preserve your SELF-ESTEEM.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Important Facts About Bullying: 3 Truths You Must Learn

2. The Explaining Trap: 3 Reasons Bullies Set It and How to Respond

3. No Apology Necessary: 8 Things You Should Never Apologize For

4. Saying Sorry Too Much: 4 Reasons You Do and How to Stop It