Want to know how to stop taking shit from people? Here are all the things you need to know to empower yourself.
When people bully you for long enough, there comes a time when you get sick of people’s crap.
Therefore, in this post, you will learn how to stop taking shit from people and reclaim your power.
Once you learn these life-changing details, you will be a force to be reckoned with when the next bully tries to toy with you.
This post will teach you how to stop taking shit from people so that you won’t be afraid to stand up to bullies and take back your power and your life.
How to Stop Taking Shit from People
When your give-a-damn bursts, you will know it!
If you are a target of bullying, there are times when you get fed up with people’s crap. Then…BOOM! You snap on some creep who pushed you over your limit.
Believe me, I understand. If this has happened with you, I cannot fault you for it. I empathize with you wholeheartedly.
It’s not that you want to fight because you don’t. You intensely hate fighting. However, if you’re a 5’4”, 120 lb. teenage girl with a target on her back, what do you do? Stand there and let them jump you?
Like most targets, I too hated to fight, but there were times I didn’t have a choice. It was either fight or be beaten within an inch of my life.
Not only would the girls try to jump me, but the guys would too. And most of those redneck brutes had no qualms or reservations about beating up on a female, even one who was little.
Some of the bullies at Oakley High threatened me with a knife or a box-cutter, and it’s a wonder I got out of there alive.
But that’s what bullying does to people if they don’t have the proper psychological tools, confidence, or know-how to deal with it. It makes them feel powerless. Moreover, it makes them desperate and puts them in survival mode!
How to Stop Taking Shit from People:
Bullying throws you into constant survival mode.
In other words, it awakens your primal instincts. It rewires your brain in preparation for a hostile environment.
When you are a victim of bullying, you must live in constant vigilance and adrenaline. You must always be on high alert.
In other words, you must grow eyes in the back of your head and be prepared for danger every time you turn a corner. But it’s not normal to live that way all the time.
It gets both frustrating and exhausting after so long. And you will grow tired of it. You will become angry and bitter if you aren’t careful.
After taking all you can take, you will show your booty to people. And you won’t just let off a little stream, you’ll blow a gasket!
The rage and bitterness only builds until it explodes.
Moreover, the longer you are bullied, the more it builds- the sense of injustice, the sadness, the rage. It all piles up.
We are all human, and no one can hold that crap inside forever. It doesn’t matter how resilient you are. It’s humanly impossible. You’re like a bottle of soda that’s been shaken up until it finally spews.
Like a dormant volcano that finally awakens, you erupt when that last creep sticks as much as a toe over your boundaries. Some people, you scare half to death, and they avoid you like the plague afterwards.
Others, you piss off even more and make them twice as determined to get you. A few see your tirade as personal entertainment. I did that a few times back when I was being bullied and abused at school.
There will be times when you yell, curse the bullies out, throw stuff, and slam doors. You will tell people to get the eff away from you and not to come back around.
Bullying can cause you to show the worst side of yourself. And when you do, the people who are there to see it won’t forget it.
How to Stop Taking Shit from People:
Personal Experience
I remember grabbing one girl by the hair and beating the living snot out of her in the library. This happened after she’d spent the last month getting in my face and taunting during the last class of the day.
Another bully received the business end of a fist after attempting to shove me down a flight of stairs. I remember running back up the stairs, whacking her upside the head with a fist, a second time with my purse, then a textbook.
The next thing I remember is dragging her down the stairs. She seemed to hit and bounce off every step going down.
Then, once I got her to the bottom, I beat and kicked her until a teacher and three other students pried me off her. These were only two of the many incidents that occurred during those years.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not something I’m proud of. Each time, I remember feeling terrible about it after it was over, and everything had cooled off.
Everyone has their breaking point.
No decent person wants to lose their cool and act like a fool. However, when you’ve been pushed and pushed, there is an eventual breaking point.
Yes, I got into fist fights. I won some fights but lost a few too.
Sadly, it all seemed to be a cycle. After getting bullied and bullied for several months, I’d snap. Moreover, some of the tiredness bled over into my home life.
Sadly, when bullies have worn you down, you’re too exhausted to even be there for the people you love when they have problems, too. You’re fresh out of patience and energy, and yes, even love.
You can’t pour from an empty cup, and as a result, you don’t give a crap about anything or anybody. All you want is to be left alone.
How to Stop Taking Shit from People:
Looking back
I look back now and realize that I didn’t handle the bullying the right way. Understand that if you don’t set healthy boundaries, this is what can happen.
So, how do you stop taking shit from people before it reaches a boiling point?
1. Set Boundaries from the very beginning.
In other words, you must stand up to the bullying when it first begins. Never wait until the bullying has gotten out of control.
Because if you keep taking shit off of people and then fight back after it’s gotten so bad, it won’t do you any good. Why? Because once people get used to treating you like crap, they won’t stop, even if you stand up to them. They’ll only double and triple down on it.
Once people have grown comfortable with bullying you, they won’t want to get out of that comfort zone. Therefore, it will be like pulling teeth to get them to stop.
It will take an act of Congress to get them to leave you alone. Start standing up for yourself now. You may be a target, but you don’t have to be a victim.
2. How to Stop Taking Shit from People:
Use confident body language for the very beginning.
Don’t slouch when you sit or stand. Stand and sit up straight with your shoulders back and head held high. Confidence is your first line of defense against bullying.
Additionally, maintaining good eye contact with others is essential. Avoid looking down or away.
Do everything you can to look confident.
3. Take pride in your appearance.
Appearance isn’t the end-all, be-all, but it helps. When you look good, you feel good. So, dress your best and take care of your hygiene.
To put it bluntly, don’t go to school or work looking like you just got out of bed. Look your best and you will feel your best. And when you feel your best, you are least likely to take shit off of others.
4. Walk away from drama.
Anyone who brings you drama doesn’t deserve to be a part of your life. Therefore, cut them off. Life’s too short and you have better things to do than to put up with people who bring you drama.
Sometimes it’s best to walk away.
5. How to Stop Taking Shit from People:
See your bullies for the cowards they are.
Realize that bullies aren’t happy people. In fact, they’re quite pathetic. Therefore, learn to see them for the kinds of people they are, and their antics won’t bother you as much.
Why? Because you will know that their behavior says more about them than it does about you. So, don’t give them the power to rile you.
In conclusion:
Take it from someone who has gone through bullying
Today, I’m a much calmer and happier person than I used to be. Why? Because I’m more assertive and I set boundaries. If I say no or ask someone to please stop doing something when they violate my boundaries, and they insist on continuing the behavior, I either tell them to leave right then, or I walk away after telling the person exactly what I think of them. I then cut them out of my life.
You should do the same if this happens to you.
I have learned that, although you cannot control another person’s behavior, you do have control over your own and whether to continue having them in your life. And if you refuse to associate with a person, they no longer have easy access to you. Therefore, it’s not nearly as easy for them to get to you and harm you.
So, never allow people to bully you and get out of control with their abuse. Speak out when people violate your boundaries. It’s the only way to keep the pressure from building and reaching a boiling point.
This post was all about how to stop taking shit from people so that you can reclaim your peace and take back your power.
Related posts you’ll enjoy:
1. How Bullies Gain Power: 9 Astonishing Ways They Do It.
2. “You Ain’t Shit!” – 5 Reasons Why Bullies Tell You This
3. Standing Up to Bullies: 7 Ways Bullies React When You Stop Taking Their Crap
🙏👍🌹
Aum Shanti
Thank you so much, Shanti!
Several thoughts here. Let’s start with the physical aspect. I think one of the mistakes victims make is the unwillingness to physical combat a bully. The reason is either a victim is timid and passive by nature, has no experience physically defending themselves or they fear that will make them an aggressive violent person. That definitely does not have to be the case. Fighting should be a last resort, but the mistake people make is not having a very big arsenal to combat bullying. Putting up your dukes needs to be one. Here is the bottom line. Physically being willing to engage with a bully often will cause them to back down. Often times they will say things like, “You aren’t worth it.” Well if they say that, good. The truth is they don’t want to be exposed for who they are. Plus, it is like this. If you win, their power is completely taken from them. Two, if you hold your own, you did better than expected and three, if you lose then it was expected anyway. Regardless, you will gain some respect from others and a bully will often move on to an easier target. Don’t ever be the one who initiates a physical battle and do not make that a habit, but it should be in your arsenal.
Second, stand up for yourself right away. Don’t mistake what I am saying here. Friends and siblings sometimes will playfully pick at you. I am not saying going after them is always the right move. If you know it is in a joking manner, that’s different. But let me also say this. If even joking, someone legitimately hurts your feelings, call them out. Make them aware of how they made you feel and see if they cool it. If they don’t, reexamine that relationship. But do not be afraid of verbally going back at a bully.
Third, report blatant bullying. Look, the truth is many schools and places of employment won’t do jack about it but still report it. Document each incident, etc. I will go one step further and say this even for poor customer service. Everyone has a bad day but let’s say there is a girl who checks out groceries at Kroger’s. If she is constantly rude to you or other customers, report it to Kroger or a manager there. You may or may not get a resolution but you may be helping someone else. Bottom line, if it weren’t for people like you buying a business’ product, they wouldn’t have a business. You are essentially paying their salary.
Four, getting back to the mental and physical side of not putting up with shit, take advantage of opportunities to “toughen yourself up.” What I mean is consider things like say a sibling rivalry. Those are normal if not taken too far. If you are playfully picking at one another, use that ability you develop with a quick comeback to your advantage. Use that for real against a bully. Playfully wrestle, rough house with siblings and close friends, it can toughen you up. Be aggressive in a productive way in any sports you are playing with siblings and friends.
Lastly, stand up hard for others being tormented. Get the reputation that if not only does a bully not mess with you but they don’t mess with your family, friends or anyone who can’t defend themselves.
Absolutely, Bradley! In all cases here, you’re being assertive and assertiveness is what it takes to make bullies back down, whether you’re standing up for yourself or for someone else.
Here is a little tip I was taught a while ago. If someone is being mean I always sternly say, “I would appreciate you not insulting me. Make a deal with you. You stop disrespecting me and I won’t tell you about you.”
Haha! I like this, Kandi! There’s a little shock value to it!
The biggest way to learn how to not take shit off of anyone is to constantly work on your demeanor. Don’t be rude of course. Show compassion and human decency and kindness. BUT if someone disrespects you in what they say and this even includes family members such as one’s spouse, children, anyone then let them know in a heartbeat they will learn to show some respect. This even goes in the workplace. Look sometimes your boss may give you a directive you aren’t crazy about. That’s business but if they are crude in how they say it or try to belittle you, let them know you aren’t going to take being talked down to. In other words, work on standing up for yourself and make it a part of who you are.
And I have said this for years. I don’t care if you are a male or a female. I don’t care what the situation is, you will not physically intimidate me. I am a non-violent person but if you choose to physically threaten or put your hands on me, I am willing to engage. I have heard the expression, “It’s not the size of the dog that fights. It’s the fight in the size of the dog.”
Absolutely, Kandi. You can be the smallest person in the room but if you stand up to a bullying and keep doing so, eventually they’ll back down.