‘Want to know how to develop charisma so that you can use it as a weapon against bullies? Here are all the tips you need to know about.
Some people seem to be born with charisma and come by it naturally. But sadly, others must learn it.
Moreover, learning charisma may not totally eliminate your chances of falling victim to bullies. However, it can lessen your chances of it.
Therefore, in this post, you will learn how to develop charisma so that you can reduce the likelihood that you’ll continue to be bullied. Also, you can use it as a powerful weapon against your bullies.
Once you learn all about these important tips, you’ll be able to not only protect yourself from bullying, but make new friends so much easier.
This post is all about how to develop charisma so that you can make friends and allies easier and ward off bullies.
How to Develop Charisma
It’s true that your reputation can be your most valuable asset. How people talk about you when you’re gone can be the difference between your ability to make friends or not. It’s the sum total of the impression you make.
And first impressions are everything. They set the stage for your future in many areas. With charisma, you’re more successful and you have more positive relationships with others.
Also, you make more money and get faster promotions. Charismatic salespeople score more sales, and win more negotiations and debates.
In other words, charisma allows you to have more influence over the people you meet. And you’re much more persuasive. Now, who doesn’t love that.
What is charisma?
Charisma is that alluring, magnetic quality that draws people in like bees to honey. Anther word for it is je ne sais quoi.
When you have charisma, you live in the moment with people. You’re focused on them and interested in them. In short, you like them more. And people have a natural desire to be liked.
With charisma, you don’t care whether they like you but you want to like them.
You can have all the good looks, all the fancy clothes, cars, and money. However, all that is nothing if you don’t have charisma. Why? Because charisma is something that’s much more powerful.
How to Develop Charisma:
Some people are born with it.
It’s true that some are just born with charisma. They have that coveted quality that goes way beyond having a pretty face or and banging body. In other words, these people have the ability to create rapport that mesmerizes people and makes them feel special.
They have that super-power that makes others respond to them positively and instinctively.
Years ago, when I was being bullied so horrifically, I would notice the people that seemed to get everyone to like them with little to no effort. Moreover, I despised these people because they had something that I wanted so badly.
I hate to say it. But, I’d give them a hard time out of pure jealousy. Also, when I asked a few family members how I could learn to be as magnetic as them, here’s what they’d tell me.
“You might as well give that up. You either have the ability to schmooze successfully, or you don’t.”
“You’re either born with charisma or you were just tough out of luck! You just have make-do without it!”
“‘Sorry, hun. That is something that can’t be taught! It’s something you’re born with. So, you just have to get along the best you can.”
You can imagine just how pissed off I was at God! In fact, I stopped talking to him for quite a few years.
How to Develop Charisma:
Thankfully You can learn it.
Thankfully, we now know that charisma and the ability to schmooze successfully can be taught, learned, and harnessed.
Charisma is an art, a craft, and you must perfect it. And you perfect it by practicing the charisma-skills you’ve learned on your family and closest friends. Then, you can work your way outward to the people you meet each day.
To learn it, you must read and study the art. Moreover, you must be able to identify the behaviors charismatic people use. Here are the characteristics of charismatic people.
- Charismatic people enjoy giving others a positive experience.
- Charismatic people understand how to make people feel great about themselves. So, they make them feel special and important.
The benefits of being charismatic
- People listen to you.
- Others give you extra chances.
- You get opportunities others don’t.
- Others will more likely forgive you for things they’d crucify others for. Bullies are very charismatic. However, their charisma is fake.
- You get filled in on secrets others don’t
- People make excuses for you, and give you the benefit of a doubt.
- Others go out of their way for you. In fact, many people will bend over backwards for you.
- You sweep people off their feet- especially potential partners.
How to Develop charisma:
Here’s what charismatic people do.
Those who are charismatic have certain behaviors that draw people to them. Here they are.
- They seem to like you…a lot!
- Those who are charismatic seem to value your opinions and beliefs
- People with charisma seem to give you all their attention and no one else. They have a way of making it feel like it’s only the two of you in a room even if the room is crowded.
- They make it seem as if you’re the most important person in the room
- Those with charisma make you feel like a million bucks.
- They make you feel great about yourself.
Understand that this kind of power is unlimited. So, nurture it, cultivate it, and exploit it! If you want to make your bullies look like the devils they are, you must first learn it!
Therefore, learn it and practice it every day. If you do this long enough, it will some come like second nature. Then, you can give your bullies a proverbial slap in the face by reaching unimaginable heights.
I can’t stress this enough! Do everything you can to develop your charisma. It can be one of the best offenses against bullies!
If you can create that awesome feeling in others anywhere and at any time, you have a gift that’s priceless! And the social rewards are limitless! With charisma, you have the keys to the kingdom!
In fact, you have that je ne sais quoi that most people covet!
How to Develop Charisma:
What is Je Ne Sais Quoi?
What is that coveted je ne sais quoi? Je Ne Sais Quoi is French, and it means, “I don’t know what.”
The term is used to describe a special but indescribable characteristic that someone has. This characteristic is hard to name. Therefore, it’s that unnameable characteristic that attracts people, especially suitors, and puts them under your spell.
When someone has a certain je ne sais quoi, people will usually say things like, “There’s just something about them.”
For example, someone who falls in love will often use that phrase when others can’t understand what they see in the love-interest.
Again, some people were born with this mysterious allure and come by it naturally. These lucky people seem to attract people easily and effortlessly.
Others, like many bullying victims, were not blessed with it. Therefore, they have great difficulty making friends. Shy individuals and those on the autism spectrum tend to have the most difficulty in this arena.
Je Ne Sais Quoi is charisma! But, it’s more than that!
You may be a victim of bullying who has difficulty making friends or finding love. However, all is not lost!
The secret to getting that je ne sais quoi is to understand exactly what it is. And, again, you can learn it! And, once you learn it, you can use it to your advantage.
So, what is it exactly?
Simple. It’s charisma. It’s also social intelligence. JNSQ is a combination of confidence, charm, and charisma. I call it, The Three Attractive C’s.
Therefore, the most precious thing in the universe isn’t money. It isn’t gold or silver. It’s these three traits because they set you on a path of success in every aspect of your life.
How to Develop Charisma:
you must have good self-esteem.
However, to have the three C’s, you must first have healthy self-esteem.
Sadly, many targets of bullying don’t realize this. They want these traits so badly but don’t have the self-esteem to back them up.
As a result, they live a lonely and unsuccessful life. Moreover, they secretly resent those who have it as they sit on the sidelines and watch them have a blessed life.
And, they may resent God for not blessing them with it, which only makes things worse.
Here are a few things you can do to raise your self-esteem and with it, your charisma.
1. Smile!
And by smile, I mean do it authentically. A real, genuine smile is one complete with the crinkles around the outer corners of the eyes.
If there are no crinkles around the eyes, the smile is fake. Realize that you must display confident body language or it’s all for naught!
2. When you’re talking to a person, say their name.
According to Dale Carnegie’s book, entitled, “How to Make Friends and Influence People,” a person’s name is music to their ears. Therefore, saying their name when you speak to them just makes them feel that having a conversation with you is all the better.
3. How to Develop Charisma:
Engage in small talk.
Never talk about anything deep. Great small talk conversations discuss topics such as the weather, sports, movies, music, and current events (just don’t go to deep on the current events).
4. Realize that it’s not about you.
One thing I want you to know right now. People care more about themselves and their lives than they do about you.
It’s just the reality of human nature. Therefore, become interested in other people and their lives. People always love someone who’s interested in them.
Start with doing the above practices and don’t be afraid to learn new tricks. Realize that you will probably need to fake it, at first. So, fake it until you make it!
It’s what I had to do. However, I discovered that when you act confident, you will soon feel confident. And when you feel confident, the fake becomes real.
Practice these things and you will soon be able to raise your charisma level and draw people to you. And once you do that, you’ll be able to schmooze like a pro!
But more importantly, you’ll feel confident as hell!
This post is all about how to develop Charisma so that you can keep away bullies. Also, so you can feel confident and in control.
Related posts you’ll enjoy:
1. Confident Body Language: 11 Ways to Look Confident
2. How to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem
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Aum Shanti
Thank you so much, Shanti!