‘Want to know the signs someone is gaslighting you and the symptoms you have while it’s happening?

When people gaslight you, you may not know it but you’ll feel it if you pay attention. Victims of gaslighting often start out as confident and level-headed people.

However, once a gaslighter gets a hold of them, they can go on such a downward spiral. They continue this decline until their confidence and self belief are completely stripped of them and they become shells of their former selves.

In this post, you will learn the 13 signs that someone is gaslighting you. These are the symptoms you feel in your mind, body, and heart.

Once you learn all these physical and psychological effects, you will be better able to recognize it not only in the other person’s behavior, but also in how you feel.

This post is all about the signs someone is gaslighting you so that you can recognize it when it happens and decide on a course of action to get away from your gaslighter.

Signs Someone is Gaslighting You

Bullies are notorious for gaslighting their victims, as are domestic, child, and sexual abusers. In reality, bullies are abusers and abusers are bullies. However, that’s the topic of another post.

As we know, when a target speaks out about the abuse and begins defending themselves, bullies are quick to paint the target as cr*zy. Moreover, they will try to reverse the roles to make the victim look like the bully.

They may even try to convince the victim that what happened didn’t really happen. The bully/abuser might say that it was all in the targeted person’s imagination. Also, bullies may accuse the victim of being overly sensitive or overreacting.

Therefore, if you’re someone who is gaslighted, understand that bullies will gaslight you to shut you up. And they want you to stay silent about the abuse so that they can keep their moral high ground and continue looking good to others.

Moreover, they do it to make you doubt your sanity. Now, you may ask what they have to gain from this.

Realize that these bullies know that if they can make you doubt your own sanity, then it’s a sure bet that others will doubt it too.

It’s tough to recognize what these bullies are doing because, in most cases, others may agree with them. Others outside the bully/victim relationship may believe that you really are mentally unbalanced, or too sensitive.

And when others agree with them, you’ll feel even more compelled to say, “well, maybe I really am overreacting. Therefore, you just clam up and go along with it to keep from being further bullied and gaslighted.

So, what are the signs someone is gaslighting you?

Simple. You know just by how it makes you feel. Here are the symptoms:

1. You constantly second guess yourself.

It’s a brutal cycle. You say something, make a judgement call, maybe a decision, and then you turn right around and begin wondering if you said or did the right thing.

This is bad because second-guessing ourselves can cause us to feel stuck in life, and there are few worse things than feeling stuck.

Moreover, you’re hyper-self-aware, self-conscious, and always on guard to make sure you do and say the right thing all the time. Realize that too much second guessing can cause you to do and say the wrong things out of nervousness. That’s no way to live!

How you solve this problem is to stop worrying about what others think. Also, understand that your first instinct will usually be the correct one.

 2. You wonder if you’re imagining things or being too sensitive and you do it several times a day.

They don’t call it “crazymaking” for nothing because it can drive you cr*zy. In other words, when people are constantly taking pot shots at you, you hesitate to make any comebacks.

Why? because, again, you’re too busy doubting yourself and putting too much value on the opinions of others.

The best way to solve this problem is to trust what you feel and go with it. You may get bullied harder for it, but wouldn’t you feel better about yourself later, knowing that you stood up to those creeps?

3. Signs someone is gaslighting you:

You over-apologize.

You apologize for trivial stuff that anyone else could do and probably get away with. Moreover, you apologize for other people’s behavior.

You may even apologize for having to go to the bathroom! In short, you apologize for everything!

Therefore, understand that some things do not require an apology. Know what those things are, then flat refuse to give any apologies. There’s no need for apologies when people are treating you like doody!

4. You’re confused all the time.

Should you do this or that, say this or that? You live in constant confusion. Again, stop worrying about what others will think or say. This is your life! Don’t waste another second of it jumping through hoops for people who don’t give two hoots about you.

Stand up to them and tell them to go @$%# themselves! Then sever ties, baby! Walk away from them without even looking back!

5. You’re never happy but feel you should be.

That’s a dead ringer that you’re being gaslighted! Why? Because when people gaslight you even for feeling a certain way, this is what happens.

Therefore, realize that your feelings are right on target. You should be happier. Only you have a gaslighting abuser in your life holding you back from the happiness you so richly deserve. And, what’s worse is that you’re enabling them!

Please understand that in no way am I blaming you. However, you must realize that you have more power than you’re being led to believe you have.

It’s time for you to get angry and tell these people to go kick rocks! Life’s too short to put up with people who mistreat you! You deserve better!

6. Signs someone is gaslighting you:

You make excuses for other people’s behavior.

This especially happens when you have fake friends who only use and abuse you. You don’t want others to know what they’re doing to you because you already know.

Moreover, you’re riddled with shame over it. It can be embarrassing when the people you call friends disrespect you because you end up looking pathetic to others.

Hence, you make excuses for them not only to hide the shame of being treated like a pile of manure, but also, to keep your abusers from being angry and making you pay for it later.

However, the only way to stop the abuse is to face the truth and ditch these fakers! Realize that, if you must make excuses for people who only bully and abuse you, they can’t be friends.

It’s time to show them OUT! And the sooner you do, the better off you’ll be!

7. You lie to avoid being ridiculed or put down, even about things you should have nothing to worry about.

When you feel you must lie about things that are not a big deal, that’s definitely a red flag! People are going to ridicule you no matter what. So, why lie about anything?

Ask yourself this question. Who are these chumps that you should have to lie?

The best thing to do is to be honest. Then, if they have a problem with it, tell them to shove off. It’s better to be honest then to live in regret, wishing you had spoke your mind when they were the ones being abusive.

Show these morons the door! Fast!

8. Signs someone is gaslighting you:

You feel that you’ve changed- that you’re no longer the confident and outgoing person you used to be.

You’ve noticed a change in yourself and it isn’t a good one. You’re not the happy and healthy person you once were and, chances are, you don’t know why.

Therefore, this is the time to begin evaluating all your relationships and know who your abusers are. Once you figure out who’s making you feel so rotten, you must make some tough decisions as to who to keep in your life and who to let go.

9. You feel like you can’t do anything right.

Its not that you can’t do anything right. It’s just that you’re allowing yourself to be forced to live life on someone else’s terms and not your own.

Moreover, your bullies are forcing you to live up to their standards and not yours. Again, life is too short to be anything but happy. Therefore, gather the courage to make the changes you must make to salvage your peace.

This means establishing and setting boundaries. Then, you must be ready to enforce those boundaries if ever the need arises.

You must not allow a single soul to disrupt your peace and your happiness.

10.  You feel hopeless.

I’ve been there. However, you must realize that nothing is hopeless. Especially if people bully and abuse you. It’s not easy to leave a toxic workplace when you’re living paycheck to paycheck. Therefore, quietly begin looking for new employment now and line something up.

Then, when a new job comes up, quit!

The same goes if you have a partner who abuses and gaslights you. Start putting money away or reach out to your family to provide a place for you until you get a job.

The idea is to get away from the gaslighters in your life.

11. Signs someone is gaslighting you:

You wonder if you’re good enough.

Trust me! You are good enough! You’ve only been led to believe that you aren’t. Understand that people have succeeded in breaking your confidence. Therefore, you must begin working hard to regain that confidence!

How you start is to find ways to get rid of the gaslighter in your life.

 12. You know something’s wrong, but you can’t put your finger on it.

Realize that being gaslighted day in and day out causes you to eventually lose yourself. In other words, it causes you to lose sight of who you are and once that happens, bullies and abusers will have you exactly where they want you.

Therefore, understand that some things are not so clear and that there are situations that we won’t get direct and easy answers to. That is why it’s so important to go with how you feel. Listen to your body. Put another way, listen to your gut.

“Trust your feelings, Luke.” – Yoda (Star Wars)

In most cases, the way you feel will be all the answers you need.

And once you go with your feelings, find a way to rid yourself of the life-leeches (if possible). It’s the only way you’ll be able to heal, get yourself back, and live a peaceful, happy, and purposeful life.

13. You Feel Trapped.

This goes especially for abused partners. It won’t be easy. In fact, it will be anything but! However, gather the courage to do what you must to take back your personal power and your life.

It may take a while and you will go through a grieving process. However, once you’ve gone through the sadness, you will be amazed at how much freer and more empowered you’ll be.

Moreover, you’ll have peace and happiness like you never thought possible.

This post was all about the signs someone is gaslighting you and the symptoms that go with it to prompt you to make the changes necessary for your self-esteem and mental health.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Signs of Gaslighting: The 7 Signs You Must Know

2. Gaslighting at Work: 5 Surefire Indicators to Watch Out For

3. Gaslighting Phrases: 7 Most Common Statements to Be Aware of

4. You Don’t Have to Explain Yourself: 5 Reasons You Shouldn’t

5. Phrases to Shut Down a Gaslighter: 9 Powerful Statements to Use