‘Want to know the importance of having the courage to be disliked? Here’s why it’s important and why it’s a part of standing up for what’s right and for your rights.
Many victims of bullying lose lots of friends because of the bullying they suffer. Many of them begin bending themselves into a pretzel just to get people to like them. This only further alienates them from others.
Therefore, in this post you will learn why having the courage to be disliked is the best thing you can ever do for yourself.
Once you learn all about this important information, you will be okay with it when people dislike you. Moreover, you will be more choosy of the people you allow into your life.
This post is all about the courage to be disliked so that you can feel better about yourself even when a few others don’t like you.
Having the courage to be disliked
Being disliked is not the end of the world. Life is not a popularity contest and there will be those who just don’t like you. And that’s okay.
Here are all the reasons you should be okay with people not liking you.
1. Like is Subjective. Not Everyone You Meet is Going to Like You
Not everyone is going to like you. Some may even hate you. But remember this! It’s their problem, not yours.
And this goes no matter who you are. Even famous people have others who dislike them. Therefore, it doesn’t matter how talented or famous you are. An estimated 10-35% of the people you know will not like you.
Nevertheless, you must always stay true to yourself. Stay true to your beliefs, and convictions. Moreover, continue to use your God-given talents to the best of your ability. Be the best you can be.
And know that if you don’t have enemies, then you’re doing something wrong.
Again, celebrities, politicians, and athletes have people who dislike them. This alone should be proof that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you.
So, feel good about yourself. Embrace all your flaws. Appreciate the people who love you. Let love in and let yourself shine!
Having the Courage to Be Disliked:
2. Opinions are like elbows.
Opinions are pinions. Nothing more. And they’re a dime a dozen. Therefore, don’t let other people’s negative opinions get under your skin. If you do, you’ll only allow their opinions to control you. As a result, you’ll only give them your power.
But once you finally begin seeing your worth, you’ll realize that you’re better off without those people. Therefore, ask yourself these questions:
- “Have any of these people even reached my level?”
- “Do their opinions even matter?
- “Who are they that I should even care?”
They don’t know you on a personal level. Moreover, they aren’t your family nor your closest friends. Therefore, the weight you give to any opinion should depend on who holds it and the relationship you have with them.
If you’re a target of bullying, you should have the same attitude. Realize that not everyone’s thoughts or opinions are relevant. Moreover, their words mean nothing.
In order to be offended by what another person thinks, you must first value their opinions. And that means, you must first value them.
3. The Value you Give to someone’s Opinion Depends on Who they Are and how close you are to them.
Realize that some people’s dislike or hatred only comes from a place of ignorance. Or, it may stem from bitterness, jealousy, or insecurity.
Therefore, take it with a grain of salt. Only value the opinions of those who know you. That means, those of God and your closest family members and friends.
Again, to be hurt, angered, and offended by someone, you must first value their opinions. And for someone to piss you off or hurt your feelings, you must value them to some degree. I can’t stress this enough.
When you stop caring what bullies think of you, you stop valuing their opinions. In that, you stop giving your bullies the value and consideration they haven’t earned. Therefore, you stop giving them your power.
Always be yourself. Stand up for your beliefs and convictions. Also, have your own preferences and make your own choices. Do the things you love to do. And lastly, follow your own dreams and your heart. Do all of these things no matter who does or doesn’t like it.
4. Having the Courage to be Disliked:
No two people are the same.
Stop worrying about who does or doesn’t like you.
No two people have the exact likes, dislikes, tastes, or opinions. Therefore, their dislike bears no reflection on you. We all move in different circles and directions.
It’s just how life works and how we’re all made.
Continue to love and embrace yourself as the person God created you to be. Continue to enjoy the friends and loved ones you do have and never mind the people you don’t have. They aren’t important.
Embrace your differences because no two people are the same. Accept every flaw and quirk you have. Above all, accept no one’s ignorant, cookie-cutter version of what you should be.
Moreover, imagine how utterly and downright boring life would be if we were all the same. Imagine a world full of white people, black people, or Hispanics. Or a world full of people with blonde hair and blue eyes or dark hair and dark eyes!
It would be like living in a town where all diners were pizza parlors and served pizza but nothing else. Yuck! I love pizza, but I wouldn’t want to eat that every day!
Therefore, love being different. Know that there are people who love you and are begging to spend time with you. And above all else, know that God loves you.
5. Having the Courage to be Disliked:
They Do Not Define you.
Bullies may think they know you and they may attempt to define who you are. But only you know the definition of who you are. By trying to tell you who you are, your bullies attempt to force you to replace your definition of yourself with theirs.
Moreover, they try to play God.
Also, your bullies also want to force you to deny your beliefs and convictions. In that they try to convince you to deny yourself.
They want you to think that what they did to you was all in your mind. Your bullies want you to live in a world of make-believe.
However, understand that to accept someone else’s definition of you, you must first discard your own. When you allow bullies to dictate your inner reality, you lose bits and pieces of yourself.
Also, little by little, you lose the awareness of your emotions each time we allow them to do it. Then, eventually you grow numb.
Some Things are off-Limits!
For example, when you cry about a legitimate hurt that cuts you to the core, bullies will often invalidate the pain you feel by replacing it with their perceptions of it.
They do it by making these biting statements.
- “It isn’t that serious!”
- “You’re too sensitive!”
- “Oh, boo-friggin-hoo! You’re just a little cry baby trying to get attention!”
- “Grow up!”
- “Put your big-girl panties on!”
- “Get over it!”
Understand that when you feel sadness, you feel sadness. When you’re angry, you’re angry. Therefore, you should allow yourself to feel those emotions. No one has a right to tell you how to feel. Ever!
6. Having the Courage to be Disliked:
No one can tell you how to feel.
In making these types of statements and accusations, bullies cause many victims to feel guilty for being a person. However, realize that bullies don’t see you as a person.
In other words, they don’t consider you as a human being with thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and convictions of your own. They see you as an abject – a robot they can control.
Bullies don’t see you as an independent and separate being. They see you as a subject who’s only here for their purpose, pleasure, and entertainment.
Therefore, in their minds, your sole purpose on earth is to make them feel powerful. Nothing more. So, instead of allowing you to own your truth, bullies will tell you what your truth should be. And they’ll force-feed it to you by cramming it down your throat.
Therefore, this is the kind of response you should expect from bullies.
7. You have a right to be your own person.
If you’re not careful, you’ll allow their statements to overtake you. In that, you’ll allow their perceptions to replace yours.
You’ll begin to see yourself through their eyes. And you’ll slowly lose sight of yourself until you don’t know who you are anymore.
Even worse, you’ll lose your intuition in bits and pieces. Eventually you won’t know when to protect yourself, because you’ll grow numb to the abuse.
Realize that this is how bullies and abusers train you not to defend yourself. And once they do, they then have you right where they want you.
This is how bullies slowly brainwash you to accept bigger abuses.
Having the Courage to be Disliked:
Never allow your bullies to destroy what matters.
Understand that you must muster the strength to withstand your bullies’ attacks. Do all you can to maintain your sense of self and refuse to accept your bullies’ definitions of you.
Never allow others to trick you into believing that they know you better than you know yourself. The truth is that you know yourself better than anyone else in the entire world.
Why? Because you’re the only one other than God who lives inside you.
However, realize that bullies are persistent. Therefore, you must maintain clarity of who you are. Your beliefs, convictions, likes, dislikes, preferences, authenticity, autonomy, and your ability to decide when something doesn’t feel good all add up to equal your truth.
Your self-definition, sense of self, self-belief, autonomy, confidence, self-esteem are like precious gems. Therefore, you must guard them against thieves who wish to take them.
And you do it by refusing to accept other people’s opinions of you. You do it by realizing that you don’t need everyone to like you. So, hold onto your self-respect.
This post was all about having the courage to be disliked so that you can maintain your confidence and save your self-esteem.
Related posts you’ll enjoy:
1. Like vs Respect: What’s the Difference?
2. Benefits of Self-Respect: 18 Good Results of Treating Yourself Well
