How to Prove Workplace Bullying: 3 Types of Proof You Need

‘Want to know how to prove workplace bullying? Here are three types of proof you should be familiar with.

how to prove workplace bullying

Workplace bullying is often more challenging to prove than school bullying. The reason for this is that adults are generally more skilled at concealing their intentions than schoolchildren and teenagers.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn how to prove workplace bullying so that you will have the materials you need to present during company tribunals or in court.

Once you have learned all about this crucial information, you will be able to gather your evidence and prove your case confidently.

This post is all about how to prove workplace bullying so that you can save your reputation and get the justice you deserve.

How to Prove Workplace Bullying

Workplace bullying is the most difficult to prove. Why? Because adults are much better at hiding their bullying than kids in school. Moreover, companies are good at covering up bullying incidents and protecting themselves from legal consequences.

Therefore, you must gather your evidence on your own.

When you report bullying at work, HR will likely tell you that they will conduct an investigation and get back with you. However, never rely on that. Here’s why.

1. HR will only look out for the company’s interests, not yours.

They may tell you that they’ll protect you. However, this is a lie that has sold many bullied employees down the river.

Additionally, if the bully is a superior, such as a supervisor or manager, you can be certain that HR will likely protect them rather than you.

Just by being higher up than you on the corporate ladder, HR will more than likely take their word over yours. That’s just how it works.

2. How to Prove Workplace Bullying:

By reporting bullying, you automatically become a liability.

HR will never tell you this. However, once you report bullying and submit that grievance form, they will consider you a threat to the company.

They may claim to have an open-door policy. But the reality is that most companies despise employees who complain even once.

When you complain, you make waves. Therefore, they’ll begin watching you and looking for any reason to terminate you.

Therefore, it would be best if you quietly gathered your evidence before reporting bullying and submitting a grievance form. Why? Because if you already have the proof you need, you will throw HR off balance.

You may even throw them into panic mode. Then, they will more than likely make mistakes that benefit you.

So, What are the three types of evidence you need?

The workplace can be very cutthroat. Therefore, gather your evidence quietly. The trick is not to let on that anything is happening until you have already collected your proof.

If you keep it quiet while gathering evidence, your workplace bullies won’t need to watch their behavior. Therefore, let them think that they have you over a barrel. Keep them comfortable with their abuse.

Why?  Because when someone is relaxed, they expose themself. That’s what you want!

Here is the proof you’ll need.

1. How to Prove Workplace Bullying:

Your own documentation.

If you want to gather evidence that people are bullying you at work, writing about it can be the first step to making a record of the attacks.

The best way to do this is to keep a bullying journal. Journals are the best way for you to protect yourself.

When you keep a journal of bullying, you establish a pattern of bullying that is believable. Moreover, you also provide evidence to present in court if you decide to go the legal route.

Also, keep your journal safe at home. Never take it to work with you. Why? Because bullies are known for plundering through your office and your desk after you’ve gone home for the day.

Therefore, you risk them finding your journal and snooping through it. So, keep it home.

Write about any of the day’s bullying events as soon as you get home, while your memory is still fresh. The sooner you write about it, the better.

When documenting bullying in your journal, be sure to use the 5-W method.

the 5-W Method

1. What

Write in your journal what happened. And when you write about it, describe the incident exactly as it unfolded. Include any exchanges of dialogue and by whom.

2. Who

Identify the bullies by writing down their full names. If necessary, include their titles and positions. Also, include the names, titles, and positions of any bystanders and witnesses.

If any supervisors are present, please add their names, titles, and positions as well. They may not want to provide any testimonies. Additionally, they may even deny witnessing the bullying incident.

However, if you document correctly, your bullying journal will expose them for the liars and cowards they are.

3. How to Prove Workplace Bullying:

When

Record the date and exact time of the incident. This is very important!

4. Where

 You must include where the incident happened. For instance, did it happen in the company bathroom? Record that. Did it occur in the parking lot? Write that in your journal.

5. Why

Write down why it happened. For example, was the bully retaliating because you reported prior harassment?. Write down every detail!

If you don’t know why it happened, write that down. Moreover, if necessary, also describe how the incident occurred. You owe it to yourself to document the bullying.

How not to record in Your Journal

Pay attention to the quality of your documentation. Make sure that you write everything neatly and legibly. The last thing you want is writing that isn’t easy to read.

Don’t be vague. And don’t write how they made you feel. Here are examples of wrong statements in documentation.

  • “Her words made me feel hurt and embarrassed.”
  • “He assaulted me.” This is why detailed documentation is so crucial.

Always write everything down in the tiniest details possible. And no hearsay. In other words, none of the “he said, she said” stuff. Ever!

If you didn’t hear it with your own ears, it’s best not to write about it. Instead, only record your own experiences.

If people are bullying you, I can’t stress enough how important it is to have documentation of it. Documentation gets more credit than spoken words.

Why? Because when you use the spoken word to describe what you’ve experienced, you can become emotional. Then, you will end up rambling about it. And it will hurt you more than it will help.

When you’re being bullied, it’s not the time to be lazy. You must be proactive and document! It’s truly the best defense there is!

2. How to Prove Workplace Bullying:

Recordings.

You can use a hidden body camera or a digital recorder. You can use both, if you prefer. However, here’s a word of caution. You must get familiar with the laws in your state on recordings.

Some states have a one-party consent rule, and others have a two-party consent rule. If you live in a one-party consent state, using recordings to gather evidence is illegal.  And it could easily backfire on you.

On the other hand, if you live in a two-party consent state, you are free to record. Therefore, consider wearing a hidden body camera or carrying a digital voice recorder to work.

But read the company’s policy first. Some companies have clauses that prevent recordings on their property.

3. How to Prove Workplace Bullying:

Electronic Evidence: Screenshots, saved emails, and saved messages.

Take screenshots of any company email exchanges between you and your bully. However, chances are that your company has software that monitors the entire network. In other words, they will be watching you.

Moreover, they will watch and record every keystroke you make. So, if you use the company computer to take screenshots, they’ll know it.

Therefore, use your phone to take pictures of the email exchanges. When you do it this way, you won’t blow your cover, and you’ll continue to keep your investigation secret.

If bullies bully you at work, there’s a good chance they’ll stalk your social media pages, get your email address, and bully you online too.

Therefore, save everything on three or more different flash drives. Then, keep each flash drive in a different place. The trick is to take precautions in case someone connected to your bullies breaks into your house to conduct a little snooping.

This doesn’t happen often. However, it has happened, and you want to take precautions.

If your workplace bully sends you a mean or threatening text, save it. The more evidence you gather, the more you build your case. Therefore, the more likely you are to get justice.

In Closing

When you’re being bullied or mobbed at work, I want to emphasize the importance of gathering your own evidence. HR may try to assure you that they’ll conduct an investigation. However, you should never take that at face value.

Realize that HR is only looking out for the company’s best interests. Therefore, you must look out for yours.

This is not the time to by lazy. So, do what you must do to gather evidence of bullying and build your case. Nobody can watch your ass but you.

This post was all about how to prove workplace bullying so that you can build a good case and win!

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Bullying Evidence: 5 Smart Ways to Get Evidence of Bullying

2. How to Document Bullying: 5 Things to Record in Your Journal

3. Bullying Journal: 8 Reasons You Should Keep One

mobbing in the workplace

Mobbing in the Workplace: How it Progresses, Step-by-Step

‘Want to know how mobbing in the workplace progresses step by step? Here are all the dirty but tiny details you need to know.

mobbing in the workplace

In this post, you will learn all about mobbing in the workplace. Also, you will learn how it begins and how it progresses, step by tiny step, in chronological order so that you’ll know what to expect if it ever happens to you.

Once you learn all the small details, you will be better able to predict it and, more importantly, outflank workplace bullies when they come for you.

This post is all about mobbing in the workplace so that you’ll be better prepared when workplace bullies set their sights on you.

Mobbing in the workplace

What is Mobbing?

Mobbing is extreme bullying by large groups. It can involve an entire school, workplace, or community.

The mob often acts under the influence of a ringleader or someone in a position of power. Mobbing almost always happens out of retaliation. Maybe the target became fed-up with being bullied and finally spoke out. Maybe they did something about it.

However, most people resort to mobbing when they’re pissed off at someone and want to teach them a lesson.

Mobbing has other names as well. People often refer to it as collective bullying.

Remember that bullies and their followers expect the target to stay quiet about the abuse. They may even demand that he bow down to and submit to it.

And when a targeted individual stands up to the bullies, they’ll punish them by working everyone else into a mob.

Chronic Bullying is Mobbing

Bullying becomes Chronic when the bullying has gone on over time. Moreover, once bullies repeat the behavior for any length of time,  it escalates to a dangerous level. It doesn’t take long for bullying to reach epic proportions.

After a while, bullies grow so comfortable with bullying you that they skyrocket the torment. Moreover, they pursue you obsessively and non-stop.

When there’s chronic bullying, there’s usually no accountability. And where there’s no accountability, there’s no incentive to stop.

Authorities refuse to address the bullies’ behavior. Then, the bullies become brazen and cocky. Therefore, their actions grow in strength, frequency, and level of cruelty.

Also, the bullies’ apathy toward you grows to a point where they lose all empathy. Consequently, they come to feel nothing but blind hatred and fury toward you.

Bullies and bystanders take the attitude that anything they do to you, no matter how cruel or dangerous, is good. Why? Because, to them, you have no value, and your life is worth nothing.

Bullying at work usually happens at the behest of a bully in power.

Bullies in power usually have followers and minions backing them up. Moreover, they enlist these human worker bees to do their dirty work.

Bullying becomes mobbing when an entire group unites to mob one person. And the bullying becomes so significant, so ingrained, and so severe that it seemingly takes on a life of its own.

Therefore, there’s no stopping it at this stage.

Members of the bullying group become drunk on their own power. Furthermore, bullying and tormenting you is all they can focus on.

Instead of the bullies controlling their evil emotions and actions, their feelings and actions begin to control them! Your bullies are so blinded by senseless rage that their very hatred controls their every move.

Mobbing in the Workplace:

When Bullying Morphs into Mobbing

They have become so addicted to power and control that they must constantly bully you to get their fix. It’s the only way they can maintain the high that this power gives them.

Understand that when bullying becomes mobbing, bullies don’t see you as a human being. They see you as so worthless and inferior that, you don’t deserve oxygen, much less any respect.

This is why mobbing is dangerous. Because, if you’re a victim of it, you the chance of either dying by suicide or murder. Yes, bullies do murder their victims.

This is why it’s so important to get out of the environment any time you suffer mobbing. Transfer to another school. Go to work for another company, or move to another area.

Never stay in an environment that hates you. It isn’t worth the cost to your mental health! The only way you’ll ever find peace is to leave without telling anyone. Only then will you be safe and have peace of mind.

Here’s a description of mobbing:

A large group of people (or mob) targets you because you opened your mouth about their abuse. Slowly, over time, they become increasingly aggressive.

Also, the number of attackers grows until they strip you of every ounce of power and completely isolate you.

Group aggression, or collective bullying, serves to reinforce a shared negative view of you. Moreover, this happens regardless of your prior value or reputation.

Vicious gossip about you circulates throughout the environment. People stick destructive labels to you and throw damaging accusations at you until they completely isolate you.

The mob will expand to include several teachers and school staff if you’re a victim of mobbing at school. Also, managers and supervisors may join the mob if you’re a target at work.

Bullies may even encourage people who are mostly peaceful and kind to join in. In other words, those who normally treat others with kindness may hate you.

Again, a bully in power directs them to gossip about you. Moreover, they instruct them to bully and abuse you.

Therefore, even the sweetest, most compassionate people can suddenly become brutal and nasty.

Peer pressure and group behavior have truckloads of influence!

Mobbing in the Workplace:

One by one, people you thought were friends begin turning on you.

And, one by one, the entire student body, workplace, or community turns their backs on you. They start slandering you. Moreover, they begin accusing you of one infraction after another.

In most cases, the people who are generally good, kind people won’t see themselves as participants of mobbing. No.

They’ll only think of themselves as defenders against an evil enemy. Therefore, they view their atrocious behavior as justified. To them, the nasty behavior is necessary.

Why? Because to know themselves as bullying participants goes against their sense of decency.

Even Sweet and Kind People Act Differently in a Group.

Always! They will be totally different people because they feel they must conform. They’ll be so different that you’ll no longer recognize them.

In fact, people who are normally sweet and kind are exponentially meaner than those who were already bullies to begin with. Why? Because they feel they have something to prove to the group.

Again, once bullying escalates to mobbing, it’s nearly impossible to stop.

The reason mobbing damages you the most is because of the support you lose so quickly. As more and more people jump on the hate bandwagon, you become radioactive.

Therefore, before long, everyone avoids you. Moreover, they continue blaming you for any tiny thing that goes wrong. Even things you couldn’t possibly have any control over.

In other words, they close ranks, thereby eliminating any help or escape from the abuse.

Sadly, there isn’t much you can do once the violence has escalated to this point.

Mobbing in the Workplace:

Step-by-Step Description of Mobbing in Progress

I can’t stress this enough. Mobbing is THE severest form of bullying. Once the bullying reaches the stage of mobbing, this is when the bullying becomes life-threatening! And if you ever a target of it, you’ll know firsthand how destructive it is.

This is how mobbing starts.

A bully or small group of bullies start a successful smear campaign. Mind you, these bullies are in positions of power. Moreover, they’re well-practiced in the arts of persuasion and influence.

Here’s something I want you to realize. A smear campaign is nowhere near as tricky as it looks. You’d be amazed at just how simple it is to smear someone. It’s so easy that it shouldn’t be so effective, but it is!

To quote the old Geico commercial, it’s “so easy; a caveman can do it.”

Here’s a chronological, step-by-step recap of how bullies do it and succeed at it:

1. The bullies Spot a specific individual who refuses to conform to their standard of who she should be.

Let’s call her “Cindy.”

Before, the bullies could influence everyone else and get them to submit to their every whim. Then, low and behold, along comes Cindy, who’s stubborn. She subtly resists the bullies’ control and doesn’t allow them to change her personality.

Moreover, Cindy doesn’t realize their motives. She doesn’t know that, just by doing her thing, she’s enraging the bullies.

Therefore, she goes on about her business and makes plans for her future. She accomplishes achievement after achievement.

Maybe she gets loads of positive attention and praise from others because she’s so successful and well-liked.

2. Mobbing in the Workplace:

Next, the bullies begin to smear Cindy.

To implement their smear campaign, they watch Cindy closely. They studying her behavior and the way she reacts and responds to stimuli. And they continue to watch her until they can anticipate her reactions.

3. The bullies then train their audience to expect a certain behavior out of Cindy.

They point out those behaviors when they occur. The bullies then associate Cindy’s completely innocent behavior with something bad or evil.

For example, let’s say that Cindy is sweet, playful, and likes to engage in a little banter. The bullies watch as Cindy banters with people.

She playfully calls someone a “dummy” or a “goofball.” However, others know that it’s all for harmless jokes. Therefore, they think it’s funny because Cindy is a genuinely kind person.

4. Next, the bullies begin making offhand comments.

They remark that Cindy’s kindness is only an attempt to kiss ass because she wants something from people. The bullies tell others that Cindy thinks they really are dummies. She only covers it under a veil of fun jokes and playfulness.

The bullies also make statements that Cindy thinks she’s cute. They also accuse her of thinking she’s smarter than everyone else.

5. The Bullies Then Repeat them.

And they repeat the same lies over and over again. To quote Josef Goebbels, “Tell a lie once, and it remains a lie. Tell a lie a thousand times, and it becomes the truth.”

 The next time others see Cindy being kind to and playfully bantering with someone, she doesn’t look so cute. Moreover, the banter isn’t so funny anymore.

Now people begin to see a side of Cindy they can’t believe they never noticed before.

6. Feeling smug, the bullies look at themselves, then at Cindy with smirks on their crooked faces and try the same thing all over again.

Therefore, they continue repeating the same lies again and again.

Before you know it, everyone wonders what they ever saw in Cindy, to begin with. Soon, they start having negative feelings toward the poor girl.

7. Cindy picks up on the negative vibes and begins to withdraw.

She doesn’t understand what she did for others to begin treating her so coldly. Therefore, she doesn’t speak to people like she did before. And why should she?

People have begun turning on her. Therefore, Cindy isn’t going to put herself in a situation to be rejected.

8. The bullies then notice that Cindy is growing distant.

They make sure to point this out to everyone. Moreover, they use Cindy’s distance as confirmation that she really does think less of everyone at work.

“Hey, look! Do you see that? Now, what did we tell you? Cindy really does think we’re all dummies! She really does think she’s smarter than the rest of us!”

“And her ass-kissing didn’t work, so now she’s too good to speak to anyone!”

9. Cindy’s withdrawal only makes people resent her more.

Although she only grew distant out of self-protection, others mistake it for arrogance. Maybe they know that Cindy isn’t being smug. However, they don’t want to believe it. They only want to believe the running narrative.

10. Things only snowball from there.

Understand that people are human, and they make mistakes. They misjudge innocent others all the time.

A smear campaign is most effective when bullies can condition a group to see any quality in you as a bad thing.

Therefore, people can become extremely cold and cruel to you. And they repeat the same cruel behavior, over and over again.

Understand that smear campaigns are effective because they quickly become bullying. Then, they escalate to mobbing. And once bullying gets out of control, things get dangerous really fast!

Why? Because, once it increases to mobbing, it’s unstoppable. And, sadly, the only way you can take your life back is to leave the toxic environment altogether.

This post was all about mobbing in the workplace so that you can recognize it while it’s happening and make your escape before it’s too late.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. The 4 Stages of Bullying

2. What Not to Share at Work When You Suffer Workplace Bullying