Category: bullies

Excuses Schools Make for Bullies: Here are 7 Most Common

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‘Want to know all the excuses schools make for bullies? If you’re the parent of a bullied child, here are all the excuses you need to prepare yourself for.

excuses schools make for bullies

Many schools shirk responsibility when bullying occurs. And sadly, they usually protect the bullies. They either blame the victim or hide incidents of bullying altogether.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn about the excuses schools make for bullies so that you will know what to expect and be prepared for them.

Once you learn all about these popular responses, you will know what to expect when you report your bullies for bullying you.

This post is all about the excuses schools make for bullies, so that you will know what to expect and be ready for it.

Excuses schools make for bullies

There are news articles everywhere with stories of schools that failed to notify parents when their child was seriously injured by bullies. Moreover, there are even stories of schools that neglected to call 911 when a kid desperately needed medical attention.

Every day, schools pretend not to notice when they see bullies making some innocent student’s life hell. Instead, they turn a deaf ear and blame the victim when they report the bullying.

In extreme cases, schools have retaliated against the victim’s family because they wouldn’t keep their mouth shut. And, they usually retaliated by making false claims to CPS and having the child unfairly removed from their home. Therefore, they only break up entire families!

The reasons school officials resort to this kind of evil are to save the school’s reputation. Therefore, they do everything possible to make the victim’s family look bad and hide the bullying that is rampant in their schools.

It is because of this that parents lose trust in the public school system. And I don’t blame them. In recent years, homeschooling has skyrocketed. Should it be any wonder?

You must realize that school officials are elected officials, politicians! And when bullying happens and schools fail to act, you can best believe that politics is behind it. Teachers and principals would rather make excuses for bullies than protect the bullied child.

Here are the most common excuses schools make for bullies.

1. “Kids will be Kids.”

“Yep. And some of them can be real hellions, like this one right here,” you say as you point to your bully.

Many teachers, principals, and even the bullies’ parents will use this excuse to sweep incidents of bullying under the rug. They also use this line to trivialize any bullying the targeted student suffers.

The “kids will be kids” response is a cop out. And it’s designed to protect only the bullies, not the child who needs the protection.

Know that school officials have a legal responsibility to keep kids out of harm’s way while they’re at school, all kids. Not just a select few. But most neglect that responsibility.

Therefore, see this as one of many excuses. In most cases, it doesn’t pay to wait for the school to help you. Sometimes, you must take responsibility for your own safety and stand up to your bullies.

2. “It’s just a personality conflict”

“You got that right. Her personality sucks and mine doesn’t. There’s the conflict.”

When your teacher or principal tells you that the altercation between you and your bully is a personality conflict, see this excuse for what it is. They’re only trying to downplay the bullying you suffer.

Realize that bullying has become an ugly word nowadays. The very term, bullying, raises a lot of heckles. Moreover, it stirs up a lot of bad emotions. It’s no wonder that school officials cringe just hearing it.

Therefore, school staff won’t even mention the word “bullying.”  They won’t say that what you endure is bullying. Why? Because they would have to admit that bullying goes on in their school, and they can’t do that!

Therefore, they call it a personality conflict because that doesn’t sound as bad.

But, continue to call it what it is. They may not like it. But your priority is not to spare their feelings. It’s to keep yourself from harm.

3. Excuses Schools make for Bullies:

“That’s just the way she is.”

“Really? Then she needs to stay the hell away from me.”

That may very well be how your bully is. However, you don’t have to put up with their bullshit. Therefore, don’t accept any excuses from the school or the bully.

You must see the subtext of this excuse. And the subtext of it is, “This kind of behavior is typical of her. So, you should overlook her.”

But don’t overlook it. Stand up to your bully and put her in her place! Let her know in no uncertain terms that you won’t take her crap.

Also, let your school staff know that they’re the adults and they’re supposed to protect bullied students. Then, tell them that they’re not doing their jobs.

And, when you say it, say it point-blank!

4. “They’ve had a hard life.”

“Most people have, but not all of them use it as an excuse to treat others like crap.”

Just because your bully has had it rough doesn’t give them an excuse to abuse you. It’s okay to have empathy for those who are having a tough time.

However, when they use it as a crutch, that’s when the empathy stops! Their feelings are valid, yes. But their evil actions aren’t.

You can feel sorry for them if you want. However, that doesn’t mean you have to let them use you as a dumping ground for all their issues.

Again, don’t take any shit off of them. Stand up and defend yourself against bullying, no matter what!

5. Excuses schools make for Bullies:

“he’s a nice person once you get to know Him.”

This is just a polite way of saying, “He’s a real asshole but, after a while, you’ll get used to it.”

If nothing else, understand this right now! Bullying and abuse are not things you should ever get used to! Ever!

You do not have to put up with that garbage!

Anytime someone makes that kind of excuse for a bully, what they’re telling you is that they’ve been putting up with their crap. So, you should put up with it too.

Can I get a “hell no?”

You must realize that just because other people think they need to cower to some creep doesn’t mean you have to. If they want to let the bully dump all over them, it’s their life. Let them have at it!

But you don’t have to! Stand up to the bully and let them know that you aren’t the one!

6. “She’s just blowing off some steam.”

“Really? Then, maybe she should go somewhere else to blow it off!”

And that’s exactly what you should say. You are not a toxic waste dump! Therefore, don’t let some creep dump their toxic waste in your creek.

You are not responsible for their problems. And they shouldn’t be taking all their frustrations out on you! So, don’t let them do that.

7. Excuses schools make for bullies:

“He’s just having a bad day.”

“Everyone has those days now and then, but most of them don’t take it out on someone else.”

If your bully is having a bad day, that’s not your fault. And it’s not your problem. So, don’t let them try to make it your problem.

Buck up. Stand up. And let the bully know that you’re the wrong person to mess with. You must realize that bullies act this way because others have allowed them to get away with it for a long time.

Instead, they tiptoe around them to keep from setting them off. And because people have kissed the bully’s ass for so long, the bully has grown comfortable with being an asshole.

If nothing else, know this. You don’t have to put up with that! Other people may walk on eggshells around this person. But it doesn’t mean you have to.

So, tell the bully to buzz off. Also, tell them not to come around you until they calm their ass down.

In Conclusion

Schools and workplaces are full of bullies and other messed-up people. The world is full of them. And it’s a shame that most adults, at home and school, don’t teach kids to stand up for themselves like they used to.

If we don’t teach young people to take care of themselves now, they’ll only grow up to be spineless adults who submit to those who abuse power. And sadly, they won’t think to question it.

Schools can make all the policies they want. But until they enforce them, innocent students will continue to suffer bullying. And school officials will continue to make excuses for bullies and blame victims.

Therefore, know what to expect and be prepared. And stand up for yourself no matter how they may gaslight you. If that doesn’t work, it might be time for a school transfer.

This post was all about excuses schools make for bullies so that you’ll know what they are and be prepared to counter those excuses.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. School Choice: Why it’s a Godsend for Bullied Kids! 

2. Signs Someone is Gaslighting You: The 13 Must-Know Symptoms 

3. Putting Yourself First: 7 Powerful Self-Care Practices

bullies who brag about bullying you

Bullies Who Brag about Bullying: How They Screw Themselves

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 ‘Want to know all about bullies who brag about bullying their victims? Here are all the behaviors you need to know about.

bullies who brag about bullying

Bullies have big mouths. When they succeed in taking their targets down, you can bet that they will boast about it later.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about bullies who brag about bullying and why they do it.

Once you learn all about these important details, you will be able to catch it the next time your bullies brag and use it to bust them.

This post is all about bullies who brag about bullying so that you can use their own words to expose them.

Bullies who Brag about Bullying

I say this because many of my bullies were chronic boasters and braggarts. Anytime a bully beat me up physically or verbally, they would immediately boast about it to get the “street cred” and make that power-high last a little longer.

In fact, most bullies who score a win at your expense will do this. They will posture. And they do it to get attention and props from others.

They will make haughty statements, such as,

  • “I let her have it!”
  • “I cursed her out!”
  • “I threw his little ass down the stairs!”  
  • “I body-slammed that b*tch!”
  • “I kicked her butt!”
  • “I made his nose bleed!”
  • “I choked her out!”
  • “I threw him on the floor and kicked her in the ribs! I wish I’d broke her ribs!”
  • “I told her off!”
  • “I beat the breaks off that *****!”
  • “That little punk got owned!”
  • “We sure put that wimp in her place!”
  • “When we see him, we’re going to cut him down to size!”
  • “We sure shut her down when she tried to open her mouth, didn’t we?”

And they’ll do it while laughing and giving each other high fives. Oh, yes! If your bullies do the same to you, they will be so proud of themselves. They will want the whole world to know how they put “a girl like that” in her place.

Moreover, those who are listening will likely laugh derisively and openly. And sometimes they will brag and laugh right in front of you and even a few teachers.

‘You see? Bullies get their egos involved any time they bully you. And they will be determined that they’re going to prove you wrong, by George!

Bullies who brag about bullying have huge egos.

They’re going to humiliate you. They are going to show you who’s boss. And they’re going to show you that you aren’t as good, safe, independent, strong, or brave as you may think you are.

They’re going to get you! And they’re going to get you good and make you feel it when they do! Bullies love to talk smack! And they do it for psychological abuse.

Yet, if anyone outside their group brings it up and, especially if you do, they will sneer, ridicule, and do their due diligence to silence you? They even deny that it’s happening, or they try and justify themselves.

Here’s why your bullies brag on themselves.

1. To remind others that they have all the power.

Anytime your bullies take you down, they grow full of themselves. They get drunk on their own power. Realize that bullies are megalomaniacs. In other words, they can’t get enough power.

Also, they want others to think they’re more important than they truly are. Therefore, they’ll gloat any time they score a win, no matter how small that victory may be.

2. To remind each and everyone else that the same can happen to them.

Bullies like to brag because they know it intimidates others besides you. In other words, they use you as an example.

Therefore, when bystanders see your bullies torture and torment you, they get the message loud and clear that it’s best not to piss them off. So, they do their best just to stay out of their way.

And if they have to bully you themselves to stay off their radar, don’t think they won’t do it.

3. Bullies who Brag About Bullying:

They do it to encourage others to look down on you.

If your bullies can get others to join them in ridiculing you, they get a huge ego boost. Also, they get the satisfaction of making you feel worse. It’s a fact that large groups can do more damage than individuals.

To keep you down.

Your bullies already brought you down when they physically attacked you. Now, they mean to keep you down by bragging about it. 

If nothing else, know this! You bullies hate your living guts. Therefore, they can’t hurt you enough. In other words, no amount of pain you suffer will be enough to satisfy them.

They’ll always want more. But here’s another thing you probably don’t think about. In doing this, they openly admit that you’re their target and that they abuse you.

Bragging will catch up with your bullies.

Yep! You read that correctly. In their incessant boasting, your bullies are outing themselves. They’re admitting that they’re the ones who are bullying you. Moreover, they’re doing it without even realizing it.

They’re too ignorant to realize that their bragging is a confession. They’re confessing who the real victim is and who the bullies are.

By letting everyone know that they have all the power, and that you’re powerless, they only admit their bullying behavior.

And once you realize these little nuggets of truth when they do this, you won’t feel so powerless. In fact, you’ll be able to use it to your advantage.

In other words, you’ll get to weaponize every word that comes out of their big mouths and use them against your bullies. You’ll use their brags as evidence that they really are the perpetrators and possibly scare them into leaving you alone.

However, most victims of bullying don’t think about this. Why? Because the bullying stresses them out so much that they lose the ability to think clearly. Also, if they suffer bullying in school, few kids think about this at age 12, 13, or even 17? 

Bullies who Brag about Bullying:

Weaponizing their brags worked for me!

Speaking from my own experience, I only thought of this years later, after a bullying incident at work. A vicious coworker accosted me in the hallway. And, as you can probably guess, she bragged about it later.

I immediate jumped on it, using it to my benefit and calling it out.  And I was amazed at the results! The bullying coworker ended up with a week’s suspension and the bullying came to a screeching halt.

From that day forward, she avoided me and never even looked in my general direction.

Therefore, I want you to know that, if you’re a target of bullying and your bullies openly brag about taking you down, that right there, is a confession!

It is important that you point that out. You can say something to the tune of: “Oh, so, you admit to bullying me? Nice! Now, I don’t have to convince anyone. You did that for me! So, thank you!”

And, when you say it, be a real smart-ass. 

If a teacher or supervisor is present. You can turn to them and say, “Uh-huh! See there? Straight from the horse’s mouth. They just admitted that they attacked me. Now, who’s the instigator?”

Do this and you will be pleasantly amazed (and tickled pink) when you see your bullies’ faces change. Their expressions will go from smug looks of arrogance to looks of horror and humiliation, knowing they really stepped in it by opening their traps.

Then you can smile devilishly as they try desperately to pull the foot out of their mouths! Remember that loose lips sink ships and boasting can backfire. Royally!

Always point out the bullies’ confession. Use your bullies’ boasting to trap them. You’ll be surprised at just how fast you shut them down. 

In Closing

As mentioned, bullies, their followers, and cohorts like to brag and boast to others and among themselves about how they abuse you. That much is true.

They gloat to anyone who will listen to them, and people seem to get personal entertainment from it. And, no, they’re not afraid to do it right in front of you.

But call them on it and you throw your bullies into panic mode. They’ll turn right around and deny it then blame you. However, once they’ve opened their mouths in front of someone in power who knows how they are, the gaslighting almost never works.

Have you even wondered why they do this- openly brag about the abuse they inflict on you, then turn around and, depending on the person bringing it up or the overall circumstances and environment, try to cover up the abuse?

It’s because this is the best way for the bullies to hide the abuse in plain sight and sadly, it works like a charm and it’s hard to combat. But don’t lose hope.

Why? Because your bullies will eventually tell off on themselves.

Know that these types of people always get a little too cocky and then get clumsy. They’ve been getting away with stuff for so long that they push a little further, a little further.

They keep pushing until they finally push over the line and end up hanging themselves. And the best part is that you get to see it!

Again, use their brags and call them out. It’s the best way to bust them!

This post is all about bullies who brag about bullying so that you can weaponize their bragging and bust them with it.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Psychological Abuse Tactics: 9 Mind Games Seasoned Bullies Use 

2. Bullies in School: 5 Ways They Tell Off on Themselves Without Realizing It

Bullies and Victim-Mentality: 9 Behaviors of Bullies Who Play Victim

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‘Want to know about bullies and victim-mentality? Here’s everything you need to know.

bullies and victim-mentality

Bullies don’t mind dishing the nastiness out to their victims. However, when the victims start giving it back to them, they’ll play the victim-role real quickly.

In fact, they’re the biggest cry-babies in the world!

Therefore, in this post you will learn all about bullies and victim-mentality so that you can keep from being blamed for their attacks.

Once you learn all about these important facts, you will be able to confidently call them out when you defend yourself against your bullies and they try to act like they’re the victims.

This post is all about bullies and victim-mentality so that you can recognize the behavior and call it out. Also, you can protect yourself from getting blamed for your bullies’ ratchet behavior.

Bullies and Victim-Mentality

Bullies have a grandiose sense of entitlement. Why? Because they’re so quick to attack you without provocation. However, you finally get fed up and show your ugly side, it not only surprises them, it also offends them.

Therefore, they’ll assume the victim role.

Here are 9 behaviors of bullies who play victim.

1. They Dissolve into a puddle of tears.

If a bully thinks they’re about to get into trouble over their bad behavior, they’ll quickly turn on the water works. They’ll cry those crocodile tears and play the victim.

Unfortunately, they’ll do it so convincingly that others will fall for their bullshit. Therefore, be prepared and don’t take the blame for their bad behavior.

Call out those fake tears. And do it loudly and with confidence. Why? Because they’re nothing but a bunch of cry-bullies.

2. They Get Outraged at you for standing up to them.

Understand that bullies feel entitled to do whatever they want to do and you have no right to stop them. In fact, they believe you don’t have a right to even speak against it.

They think that they are beyond reproach and that you should never question their behavior.

You’re bullies think they have a right to mistreat you and you’re just supposed to bow down and take their crap. You’re just supposed to let them harm you and take it with a smile.

Why? Because, in their minds, you’re inferior. So, you should just shut your mouth and take it. They may not come out and say it. However, this is how these chumps think.

3. Bullies and victim-mentality:

They’ll grip, whine, and complain when things don’t go their way.

For instance, if you hold them accountable for anything, your bullies will bitch, moan, and regress into a toddler. If you stand up to them, they may run to a teacher or boss-man and cry like a little bitch.

They might throw a temper tantrum, railing against the injustice and unfairness of it all.

Also, they may also do something to get back at you for daring to stand up for yourself. Understand that cry-bullies must always get their way. This is why they get furious with and throw a fit with you.

Then, they’ll tell anyone who’ll listen that you’re the bully.

4. They’ll shout you down when call them out on their bad behavior.

To them, their words and opinions are golden. Therefore, if you happen to speak against them, your bullies will instantly turn into petulant children.

They’ll call you all kinds of ugly names and launch personal attacks against you. Moreover, they may even hit you first.

But, if you hit them back, they will cry like a wimp and claim you started it.

5. Bullies and Victim-Mentality:

They want everything handed to them.

Cry-bullies are entitled to have whatever they want when they want it. They don’t like to work for anything. Moreover, they don’t like to wait for it either.

These types of people are impatient. When they want something, they want it right then. And they’ll never stop bothering you until you cave in and give it to them.

You must understand that your bullies do this to wear you down. However, don’t give them the satisfaction. Double down and resist, no matter what! Stand firm, if for nothing more than to teach them a lesson.

6. They hate it when someone else has life better than they do.

When your bullies see you doing better than them, it makes them feel indignant. In other words, they feel that life hasn’t given them a fair shake.

They will often sulk and play on others’ sympathy. Also, they will try to get back at you for being just a little luckier than they are.

Understand that these types of individuals see your successes as injustice.

7. They Shift the blame to you.

This point takes me back to how the bully tries to make you look like the bully. In some cases, this person deludes herself into believing that she is, in fact, the victim.

And sadly, they’re very successful in making others believe that garbage.

Therefore, when you think of a cry-bully, think Nellie Olson in the TV series, “Little House on the Prairie.”

Don’t pander to the crybully and don’t be too nice and try to calm them down. If you do, they’ll only keep manipulating you.

8. Bullies and Victim-Mentality:

Many Bullies Cop Out Behind Victimization.

Too many people use past trauma as justification for wrongdoing. They feel that because they suffered, life owes them somehow.

I have seen people mistreat others merely because of the bullying they suffered in the past. But, why do they do this? It’s because they think that it’s the only way they can feel empowered again.

Sadly, I was guilty of the same thing in high school. It isn’t something I’m proud of today.

For example, some may choose to rob a bank or burn down a corporate building because they grew up poor. Because they didn’t get a fair shake in life, they think that it justifies their crimes.

In their minds, the world owes them. Therefore, they have a good excuse for striking back against a system they believe screwed them over.

And, when the law finally catches them and hauls them off to jail, they become even more embittered. Why? Because they believe that being held responsible for their crimes only further evidences that they aren’t getting a fair shake.

We’re all responsible for our actions regardless of what happened to us in the past. 

Evil behavior always brings consequences. You reap what you sow.

Your feelings are valid but your actions aren’t. Past victimization does not justify wrongdoing. Ever! A reason does not equal an excuse. We’re all responsible for our lives, whether you like it or not.

I could have gone on bullying others because people bullied me in the past. But where would it have gotten me? Nowhere! That behavior would have only brought consequences and more misery.

Wouldn’t it be better to learn from adversity and take accountability for your life? Therefore, it’s up to you to try to make your life better than it was in the past.

9. Bullies and Victim-Mentality:

They live in the past.

Now, reminiscing isn’t a bad thing. To look back on yesterday, when life was much simpler, makes you feel good. Happy memories always make you feel better.

However, when you constantly ruminate on the bad stuff that happened to you, that’s when it becomes a problem.

You hold grudges. And you long to someday get back at the person who hurt you. This isn’t good for anyone. It only eats you out from the inside.

Bullies are notorious for holding grudges.

Sadly, too many survivors of bullying hold on to grudges. They constantly ruminate over the bullying they endured, wishing they had knocked the hell out of the bully. They look back with remorse, shame, guilt, and regret.

Now, it’s normal to do right after you’ve gotten out of the toxic environment that encouraged the bullying. I completely understand. However, when this goes on for too many years, you only hold yourself back. Unnecessary baggage only keeps you down.

Therefore, don’t trap yourself in an endless cycle of what-ifs. Why? Because, when you do, you only keep yourself stuck in a quagmire of misery.

Also, you forgo opportunities to learn from and grow from those experiences.

So, let it go. Accept what happened and learn from it. Let it make you better instead of bitter!Only then can you reach empowerment and find happiness.

In Closing

Nothing makes you sicker than seeing some punk bully start something they can’t finish. And there’s nothing more pathetic than a bully who pushes someone too far, than cries like a schoolyard sissy when they get their ass kicked up between their shoulders.

But sadly, this is how most of them get away with bullying.

Therefore, if you’re a bully, do yourself a favor. Don’t mess with someone and expect not to get some in return. Don’t be a cry-bully.

And, if you’re a victim, stand up for yourself even if your bully tries to put on the innocent little victim act. Continue to hold your boundaries.

Don’t fall for the crocodile tears or the selective outrage. Call that shit out! And stand strong. Realize that victim-mentality is only a farce, designed to keep your bullies’ asses out of trouble.

And lastly, and most importantly, refuse to see yourself as a victim. Instead, see yourself as a target. Why? Because there’s a difference between a target of bullying and a victim of bullying.

This post is all about bullies and victim-mentality so that you can recognize it when you see it and be prepared for it when you stand up to your bullies.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. What is a Crybully and How Do You Spot One?

2. Setting Boundaries: 3 Powerful Practices to Hold Your Ground

3. Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying? 15 Must-Know Answers

4. Target vs Victim: 5 Reasons Your Choice of Words Matters 

female bullies reddit

Female Bullies: 7 Reasons They Bully Other Women and Girls

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‘Want to know all about female bullies? Here are all the reasons they like to bully other women and girls.

female bullies

Female bullies are the most vicious of the sexes. Why, because they’re sneakier with their bullying than their male counterparts.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about female bullies and the reasons they bully. Moreover, you’ll also learn the traits these bitches look for in potential victims.

Once you learn all about this important information, you will be prepared the next time these little vixens come for you. And you’ll be better able to defend yourself against them.

This post is all about female bullies, the covert tactics they use, the types of victims they look for, and how you can defend yourself so that you can rise above them like a phoenix! 

Female Bullies

Message to Female Victims

I knew how you feel. You see all the boys at school fawning over your bullies.  Or, you may be the single lady at work who watches all the suitors flirt with your workplace bullies. All the while, they only overlook or even laugh at you.

And the funny thing is that most of these girls may or may not look as good as you. However, these guys see something in these gals. And believe me, I know the sense of bewilderment you must be feeling.

But let me tell you what they really see in those girls.

They see potential scores- easy marks – cheap thrills! To put it bluntly, they have plans to bed these women. A honeypot is a honeypot and erect penises have no eyes. So, do you really want a guy to see you as that?

So, why do these guys avoid or laugh at you? Maybe it’s because they sense that if they were to ask you to put out, you’ll only turn them down flat. Therefore, these guys are great big chickens!

You must realize that most Female Bullies are easy.

Understand that when people know they can’t have something, they show disdain for it. In other words, they dump all over it to look like they’re the ones in control.

Guys in your age group may pass you over. However, many of the  guys will only use your them one time. And, once they get what they want from them, they’ll toss them away like a dirty diaper. Yuck! Who wants that!

And many of these jerks are under the delusion that they’re doing these girls a favor by even considering them. Also, they think that these gals are automatically obligated to put out to them.

This happens a lot in school.

And, if they say no, the boy usually kicks her get out of his vehicle and drive away. Therefore, he leaves her stranded on the side of the road at ten or eleven on a Saturday night. This happened to many girls when I was in school and it probably happens today.

So, can you really say that you’re unlucky? Absolutely not. It’s only evidence that you’ve dodged a bullet!

Therefore, if you’re one of those girls whom guys overlook, it may be a blessing in disguise! Do you really want some creep who’s only out to get in your pants?

Hold on to your virtues. Be confident in who you are. Moreover, be proud that you have morals and aren’t like the other girls who get kissed up to.

Why? Because the favor they get from these guys always comes with a huge price tag!

Female Bullies Like to Target Classy Chicks and Good Girls

In no way am I judging anyone who is sexually liberated. That’s not my job. Therefore, I won’t attempt to do a job that’s only God’s to do.

But when these bullies mistreat classy ladies who choose to save themselves for true love, that’s when I’m going to have something to say. And some people won’t like it. So, here goes.

Have you noticed that it’s almost never the butt-floss wearing females who get targeted for bullying? It seems that it’s mostly the girls who are discreet and have self-respect that people treat the worst.

Bullies and others ridicule them and made to feel like there’s something wrong with them if they don’t follow their lead. Moreover, it seems that bullies love to target these ladies.

But why?

1.Pop culture and music.

We get subliminal messages from the music, movies, TV, and other media outlets. And they push the narrative that it is okay to, dare I say, act like a “ho.”

Girls listen to a lot of “thot-pop.” Also, they watch videos of overrated stars like Cardi B and Miley Cyrus, who bare it all and commit blatant sexual acts for all the world to view right from their living rooms.

Who remembers either watching Cardi B’s raunchy performance with Megan whatshername to her infamous “WAP” song?

Sadly, our girls are getting the message that it’s okay, and worse, completely normal to let it all hang out. Society has normalized acting inappropriate in public.

Many girls think that it’s completely fine to cheapen themselves and make themselves nothing more than a sex object. In other words, they think it’s better to use your behind rather than your mind to get ahead in life.

Society is embracing the wrong values. Moreover, female bullies are persecuting the classy ladies who don’t or won’t jump on board.

The running narrative is that anything goes. Showing belly, boobs, and butt is what it takes to get a man.

However, no guy who’s worth his salt would even consider a long-term relationship, much less marriage with such a woman.

2. Female bullies think that classy women are old-fashioned and boring.

It’s no secret that bullies prioritize the wrong things. They focus on getting attention, approval, admiration, and popularity.

Therefore, they’re all for indecent behavior and stripping down to nothing if it will give them those benefits. Because bullies are all about being idolized and worshiped.

And they’ll only sneer at others who aren’t ratchet and slutty like they are.

But! Here’s the thing. Maybe, just maybe, it isn’t only that bullies consider classy women and good girls to be old-fashioned and boring.

They see classy woman and good girls as a threat.

If  you’re one of those decent ladies who gets bullied by other females, It just might be because you won’t  bow down and worship them. You won’t give them the validation they’re seeking.

Moreover, male bullies may bully you because they know that you just might reject them! Gasp!

So, again. Why do people bully good girls and classy women?

Because a good, classy, down-to-earth lady respects herself too much to kneel before anyone. And the she-bullies with narcissism are more than likely to be the butt-cheek baring, all-eyes-on-me, girls.

And the lady deems attentions-seekers to be of the lowest common denominator. Therefore, such females aren’t worth her time, and the she-bullies know that. And they’re angered by it.

Female bullies hate it when someone inferior won’t kneel.

God forbid that anyone they deem inferior rejects them. I mean, think about it. Maybe that’s why these she-bullies are so hell bent on bringing you down.

It’s because, deep down, they already know that you don’t think very highly of them. They have an I’m-gonna-get-you-before-you-get-me kind of attitude.

So, if you’re one of these victims, this is my message to you.

Know that your worth is so much higher than the she-bullies and their tomcat male counterparts. You have standards, a strong sense of self and know that you’re not just a sex object.

Therefore, you chose to expose your mind and not your behind. And one day, you’ll find a real man who truly deserves you and wants to love you.

Know that your worth isn’t determined by the eye candy you can offer men. And, it isn’t determined by what you can do for them.

Your sex-appeal doesn’t determine your worth.

Your worth is determined by what you can do for yourself and how well you treat yourself and others.

The best thing you can do is to be a lady. Why? Because it is the ladies who end up being the winners. They don’t have to resort to cheapening themselves to fit in or get male attention.

Moreover, they don’t accept attention from the cheap tomcats who crawl up behind the she-bullies.

The beautifully decorated, yet half-naked she-bullies are a dime a dozen. The she-bully only attracts the dogs.

In other words, they attract the beta-men who only pose as alphas. Only the cheap playboys who are only there to hit it then quit it chase these girls.

But a lady is a keeper. She’s not a one-date wonder or a one-night stand. Why? Because she knows she’s worth more than just her body.

Ladies don’t care what female bullies think of them.

The lady doesn’t care what petty people think of her. She doesn’t give a hoot that the she-bullies and their tomcats look down their noses at her. Because they don’t matter.

It is the lady, the once-bullied classy chick and good girl who will score a high-value man. Why? Because she is a high-value woman.

Moreover, the lady will live a good life because she has good morals she lives by. And those morals are, in fact, so strong that they remain unchanged by the decaying society we live in.

Instead of being half-naked to fit in, the lady will stand out by keeping her clothes on. This doesn’t mean she dresses like a nun, but she keeps it classy.

And, if you’re one of these ladies, that’s why you’re already ahead of the game. She-bullies are only good for a one-time roll in the sack. Ladies, on the other hand, are wife for life material.

Here are the 7 Reasons Female bullies bully other women and girls.

1. Competition.

She-bullies are overly competitive. Females who are ladies threaten their power. Therefore, those bullies will give them a hard time.

They do it to destroy their confidence and degrade them in the eyes of others. Especially suitors!

2. Jealousy.

If a female bully sees a lady who’s got her shit together, she will be jealous of her. As a result, the bully will do her best to know her down a peg or two.

3. Insecurity.

These chicks are naturally insecure. Otherwise, they wouldn’t behave the way they do. When they see some girl who’s secure in who she is, they want to tear her down.

Why? Because they want her to be as insecure as they are.

4. Female Bullies think it looks cute.

Ferocious females mistreat others because they think it impresses others, especially guys. However, others look down on that kind of behavior.

No one wants to be around someone who’s petty. And a catty woman is a complete turn-off to guys.

5. For social status.

Unfortunately, most people are toxic these days. Therefore, bullies are likely to be rewarded in toxic environments.

However, in one that’s healthy, bullies won’t get far.

6. To impress people.

This goes back to number four. Catty behavior isn’t impressive at it. It’s socially repelling! Moreover, no guy wants to be with a drama-queen. Why?

Because, he knows that she just might turn on him too. If you want to know how a person will treat you, watch how they treat others.

7. Female Bullies Bully other females To feel better about themselves.

They may feel better for the moment. However, it won’t last. That sense of power bullies get can fade rather quickly!

In closing

If you’re a decent, self-respecting woman who other females love to torment, I can’t stress this enough!

Women who are catty never get far in life.

So, don’t let the desire to fit in cause you to relax your values, your morals, your beliefs, and your convictions. Hold on to your standards. Know your worth.

Things may be lonely for you now. However, the virtues your bullies ridicule will be the very qualities that real, quality people will cherish.

You just wait!

This post was all about female bullies and the reasons they bully so that you will be prepared for them. And You’ll respond to them with poise and confidence.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Catty Women: 5 Powerful Ways to Deal with Their Bullying 

2. Know Your Worth As a Woman: 5 Rules to Live by 

3. Benefits of Self-Respect: 18 Good Results of Treating Yourself Well 

why people reward bullies in the workplace

Why People Reward Bullies

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‘Want to know why people reward bullies? Here are all the reasons you need to know about so that you can use them to your advantage.

why people reward bullies

It’s not uncommon to see bullies get rewards they don’t deserve. There are countless articles about bullies who gain favor from others.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn exactly why people reward bullies so that you can see what tools bullies use to gain favor.

Once you learn all about the tools they use, it will no longer confuse you. Moreover,  you just might be able to use it to your advantage.

This post is all about why people reward bullies so that you can relieve any confusion you may have. Also, you can take advantage of this new knowledge without stepping on others.

Why People Reward Bullies

Ever wonder why most seem to celebrate your bullies but hate you?

Everywhere you go, the workplace, school, or community, others tend to favor those who don’t deserve it. It seems that they support the vilest and nastiest human beings.

Yet, they despise those who go about their business and just want to live their lives in peace. So, why is this?

1. It’s because the world is mostly fake.

Put simpler, it thrives mostly on appearances. The majority of people are fake. Therefore, in an environment of fake individuals, others will only demonize those who are authentic.

Why? Because those who are real are threatening to everyone else. So, others will demonize them to contain the threats.

2. It’s because Most people prioritize the wrong things. 

Most fake people prioritize power, fame, sex, money, success, and good looks. Why? Because these are things they think make them seem more important.

Bullies bully to achieve these things. Therefore, others may reward them for it.

Also, too many think that strength is all about the ability to step over others. Granted, this may have been true during the caveman days. However, it isn’t so today.

Today, strength comes from social intelligence and the ability to keep quiet and listen. Strength can come from physical toughness. However, you also need to compliment that with mental resilience.

Genuine strength comes from staying true to yourself and doing the right thing. It’s the ability to stay kind when you’re surrounded by evil.

True strength is standing up to bullies when you feel at your weakest. Moreover, it’s the endurance to take life’s gut punches and having the resolve to get back up.

3. Why People Reward Bullies:

It’s because Bullies suck up to those in power.

Bullies are notorious for kissing the right butts. They do this to win favor and special treatment. On the other hand, those who have integrity won’t kiss booty to get ahead.

They prefer to advance on their own merit. They’re true to themselves and feel they don’t have to lick someone else’s boots to survive and thrive.

Also, they mind their own business and don’t get involved in cliques and social politics.

4. It’s because Bullies Demonize Those with Integrity.

Bullies are best at making those who are good look evil. Moreover, they do it by provoking them into an argument to get a reaction.

They then weaponize the person’s reaction by adding their own spin to it. They take a tiny grain of truth and embellish on it.

Therefore, they distort the person’s reaction and make it look worse than what it is. Make no mistake, bullies are good at distortions.

They’re like magicians in that they create illusions that are believable. They practice sleight of hand with their words. Bullies are the best wordsmiths.

For example, you can make an honest mistake and a bully will twist it to make it look like you did it on purpose. Bullies are experts and making simple mistakes look like sins punishable by death.

5. Why People reward Bullies:

It’s because Those with integrity threaten the status quo.

Again, good people threaten bullies and their supporters. In an environment of evil, they’ll likely the truth. Moreover, they’ll bring to light things that bullies will move heaven and earth to keep hidden.

Just by their down-to-earth personalities, those with integrity can expose the bullshit that goes on. And bullies know it.

Therefore, they decide that it’s better to mob them out before they have a chance to bust them. This bears repeating. Anytime you face a bully, and you never provoked them, it’s usually because you threaten them somehow.

6. It’s because bullies get privileges that others don’t get.

In most cases, bullies have followers and bystanders covering for them when they bully you. You, on the other hand, get no leniency whatsoever.

Therefore, you must make extra efforts to keep your hands clean. Why? Because, unlike the bullies, you can’t afford to break any rules.

You understand that if you even dare to engage in the same behaviors the bullies do, you’d quickly be punished.

In other words, those in power allow bullies to get away with the same things they punish you for. You see it all the time in schools, workplaces, and communities.

For you, there’s no margin for error. You don’t have the benefit of a cheering section. And, if bullies can’t find anything to hold against you , they’ll make something up.

7. Why People Reward Bullies:

It’s because They don’t play by the same rules.

Understand that bullies have a sense of entitlement. Why? Because they’ve been getting away with bad behavior for so long that they demand that others stay silent.

Witnesses are fully aware that if they dare to open their mouth, the bullies will make them their next victims. Therefore, the bullies stay exempt from accountability.

This is how double-standards stand firmly in place. While those in power give bullies a pass for the worst behaviors, they punish you for human errors that anyone could make.

Moreover, they may hold you accountable for slights that bullies falsely accuse you of. Bully privilege is real. And, it’s been around since the beginning of time.

8. It’s because most bullies have social capital.

What is social capital? It’s social networks and relationships among those in a community.

Most bullies have the most social connections and friends in high places. These bullies are usually those whom most others either fear or think well of.

In fact, they can be the “cool kids” at school or the “Good Ol’ Boy” clique at work or in town. These bullies can also be local politicians and businessmen. Or, they can be members of well-known families in a particular area.

Although money helps, they don’t necessarily have to be rich. All they need are the right connections. I’ve knew people who were quite poor and had powerful relationships.

Therefore, money isn’t what gives them power. Their power comes from their connections. When bullies have the right connections, they’re especially dangerous because they can do the most damage.

9. Why People Reward Bullies:

It’s because they know the right people.

These types of bullies actively build a network of social relationships to re-enforce their power. With this kind of power comes protection from consequences.

In many cases, these bullies already have close and well-established ties, which go back several years.

Therefore, these relationships ensure that the bullies are well-protected and above reproach. In other words, they have carte blanche to ride roughshod over anyone they want. And they can do it freely and with impunity.

These bullies understand that they have good name recognition.  And they take advantage of it. Any time a bully has a ton of social capital, others will not risk alienating them. Why? Because they risk losing their own social standing.

These others are called secondary bullies. And chances are that if your bullies come after you, the secondary bullies will only follow their lead. Why? Because they do what’s expected of them.

10. It’s because These Bullies are Popular.

Popular bullies also tend to be well-connected. Again, the most popular and well-connected bullies can do anything they want to anyone.

Therefore, if you get on their bad side, they will use their connections to destroy every aspect of your life. And they’ll never stop coming after you.

Understand that these bullies are very influential, persuasive, and, most of all, convincing. Their names alone carry a lot of weight behind them.

They have trust, mutual understanding, and shared values and behaviors which promote unity. This unity only strengthens their group.

Therefore, when one of these people says something, others, even those outside their circle, will more likely to listen!

11. Why People Reward Bullies:

It’s because they’re the “sacred cows” of the community.

Sacred cows have the most power and influence in the community.  In fact, they have so much of it that others won’t dare to question nor speak against them.

And this goes even if they’re in the wrong. If anyone does speak against them, the gaslighting they suffer will be through the roof!

With sacred cows, people may not necessarily like them. They may even hate them. However, the thing is that they fear them.

So, even haters are careful not to speak against them publicly or within earshot of the wrong people.

With that said, if you’re a victim of sacred cows, they can make your life hell. They can tarnish your name with smear campaigns.

And others will believe the rumors and lies simply because of who they come from. Moreover, sacred cows can also cause you to lose your job and have you blackballed.

Therefore, they can rob you of any opportunity to find other means of employment.

These bullies can destroy your ability to make new friends because others will be too afraid to associate with you. Also, if you own a business, they can discourage potential customers from doing business with you.

In worst cases, they can have someone set fire to your business and burn it to the ground. Moreover, don’t put it past these bullies to trump up false criminal charges against you and set you up to be arrested.

They will also send henchmen to either visit you or meet you on the street somewhere. Therefore, watch for any suspicious characters with threatening body language.

So, what can you do?

Sacred cows can throw you off your game.

 Therefore, if you expect to defend yourself successfully, learn all the facts about bullying. And don’t offer any apologies.

Also, you must stop being so shocked about it. Realize that such injustices exist and they happen all the time.

 Instead of getting blindsided by it, prepare! Why? Because, if you let it shock you, it’ll only throw you off balance and hinder your ability to think properly.

Realize that we live in a fallen world and one that isn’t just. Also, understand that nothing is impossible. Therefore, expect the unexpected!

Only then will you be able to come up with a strategy to protect yourself.

Why People Reward Bullies:

here are a few things you can do to stay safe from these types of bullies.

  • Befriend and align yourself with other targets. Why? Because you aren’t the only one these bullies torment.
  • If you can find former members of the bullies’ group who’ve been ousted for whatever reason, that’s even better! These people would be the ones who have private and sensitive info about each of the bullies and their sycophants. They’ll want a little payback.  Therefore, they’ll be only too happy to give you the juicy details!
  • Establish tight connections with your fellow targets and with the former members whom the bullies double-crossed or booted out of the “social club.”. Band together with them because nothing unites people like the shared anger and hatred toward an enemy.
  • Pal around with or eat out with them. Be sure your bullies see you with these outcasts and with as many of them as possible. This will provide you with a little protection! The more outcasts you connect and bond with, the better!
  • Always have their backs and make sure they have yours! This is very important!
  • Make friends, take jobs, and seize opportunities that are outside the bullies’ element.
  • If all else fails, move to a new area. Tell no one of your plans. Stay quiet about your new job, your new address, and where you’re moving to. Sometimes, it’s just best to vanish!

Do these things, and you’ll be much safer!

This post is all about why people reward bullies to relieve any confusion you may have and to give you a few things you can use to your advantage.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Bullying and Gaslighting: 7 Ways Bullies Gaslight Victims 

2. Important Facts About Bullying: 3 Truths You Must Learn 

3. Threatening Body Language: 21 Hostile Cues to Never Ignore 

why bullies are such good liars google

Why Bullies are Such Good Liars: 9 Ways They Deceive

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‘Want to know why bullies are such good liars? Here are all the reasons they make their lies look like the truth and what you can do.

why bullies are such good liars

As any victim of bullying knows, bullies are expert liars. If you’re a target of bullying, have you ever wondered why? Moreover, have you ever wondered how they do it?

In this post, you will learn why bullies are such good liars. Also, you will learn exactly how they successfully deceive others so that you can call it out.

Once you learn all about this important information, you will know the exact ways bullies lie so successfully. Even better, you will be able to recognize it when they do it so that you can peg them on their BS and weaponize it to protect yourself.

This post is all about why bullies are such good liars so that you can have your bullies’ number and use it to bust them.

Why Bullies are Such Good Liars

The reason why bullies are pros at lying is because they rarely tell boldface lies. Instead, they embellish on the truth. They may also take away from the truth.

‘You see? Boldface lies are too easy to find out. Therefore, all bullies need is a tiny grain of truth. Then, they can make their lies more believable.

So, what do bullies do to make their lies so convincing?

1. They use Exaggerate the truth.

They’re the kinds of deception bullies love to practice. Bullies understand, perhaps more than anyone else, that a pure lie isn’t likely to be believed.  It would only discredit them.

However, if they tell a half-truth, which is a lie that contains even a tiny grain of truth, people will more than likely believe it.

When a bully exaggerates facts, they blow them up and make it bigger than what it is. For example, a bully will provoke you and keep provoking you until you get fed up.

In a low but angry growl, you tell the bully to buzz off. The bully will then tell everyone else about the altercation, making sure to stretch the truth.

The bully will then exaggerate what happened by telling others that you screamed and cursed them out. Also, they’ll make sure to leave out the part where they kept provoking you until you got tired of their crap and told them to buzz off.

2. Why Bullies are Such Good Liars:

They Distort facts.

The bully may even distort the truth. They may do this by saying that you told them to f*** off when they know that you told them to buzz off.

Distortions are also perfect for bullies because, like exaggerations, there’s always a degree of truth to them.

Here’s another example. Your bully supervisor tells you to do a task. You haven’t yet completed the first task and you must finish it in the next thirty minutes to meet the deadline.

You tell the bully boss that you’ll get started on it as soon as you’re finished with the current task. The bully boss goes to management and distorts everything.

He exaggerates your response by telling management that you refused to do the task. Therefore, he tells them that you’re being insubordinate

Moreover, he conveniently leaves out that you told him that you would fulfill his request as soon as you got done with the task at hand. As a result, management reprimands you and gives you a write-up for insubordination, not knowing the whole story.

This is how exaggerations and distortions work.

Therefore, it’s important that you know how to name lies like this. Why? Because, when you can put a name on them, you sound so much better to your listener. You can better communicate what the bullies are doing without rambling.

3. Why Bullies are Such Good Liars:

They take things out of context.

Bullies are experts at taking things out of context. They can twist it and spin it to fit their narrative.

For example, an author writes a tell-all book about the abuse she suffered. One of her former abusers buys it and reads it.

The abuser comes to the part where two more of the author’s abusers die in a tragic accident. The other two happen to be the reader’s friends.

In the book, the author also admits that, when the two abusers died, she didn’t give a damn. And the author sees the deaths as two less monsters she’d have to deal with.

However, she does mention that her feelings about the deaths have changed in the years since the accident.

The reader is outraged at what she reads. So, she takes it out of context. Therefore, she tells the rest of her friends about the book, leaving out the part in the book where the author wrote that she no longer felt glad the two abusers were dead.

Instead, she tells everyone that the author still feels happy the two people are dead. In fact, she makes it sound as if the author celebrates it now.

And she tells them not to read the book because it will only upset them.

However, here’s the real reason she tells others not to read it. It’s because she’s afraid that if they read the book, they’ll figure out her lie.

Therefore, bullies love taking things out of context because, nine times out of ten, it works like a charm!

4. Why Bullies are Such Good Liars:

They Use Confabulations.

Many times, your bullies will blow up on you for absolutely no reason. Later, when others question them about the blow-up, they can’t remember why they lost their temper.

So, your bullies conveniently drum up fake memories to fill in the blanks. But, know the reason behind this. They do it in order to sound plausible instead of ridiculous.

When bullies confabulate, they do it to feel sane. And the way they feel sane is to insert these made-up stories. I’ve seen this happen many times.

In fact, many of my bullies justified themselves to others by using the same method. Here’s another thing about confabulations.

People can mistake them for real memories. Therefore, when bullies confabulate a justifiable reason for their appalling behavior, they believe themselves.

So, is it any wonder that most abusers appear to be telling the truth when they justify and rationalize away their abusive actions? When a person believes their own lies, others are more likely to believe them too. It’s a fact.

This is another reason bullies are talented liars.

5. Why Bullies are Such Good Liars:

Confirmation Bias.

People will believe what they want to believe. And no amount of solid evidence will convince them if they refuse to believe it.

Sadly, the only way confirmation bias has anything to do with truth is when it matches the belief. Therefore, if the truth doesn’t match the person’s beliefs, chances are they’ll only deny it.

Moreover, they’ll and elsewhere for evidence that contradicts it.

Your bullies will do the same when it comes to you. To justify and explain away their cruelty, they’ll find proof that supports their opinions of you.

For instance, bullies abuse you and they get caught. Later they have to stand tall before a member of authority to answer for their abuse.

Searching for information that fits

So, the bullies tell the person in authority that there’s a good reason why they beat you up. They make up some cockamamie excuse for their brutality.

In other words, they find ways to blame you. They may say that you instigated the fight by starting a rumor that could cost them their reputations. And they just had to teach you a lesson.

This is what confirmation bias is- it’s the tendency to recall, interpret, and favor information in a way that confirms a pre-existing belief.

Think about it. The media does this all the time. A witness may pull out their phone and film something terrible that is happening right before their eyes. They then send it to a news station to be broadcasted.

When the news media gets a hold of the film, they will edit out anything that doesn’t fit their beliefs. And they’ll only show the bits and pieces of the film that best fits the story they wish to put out.

If they get an audio recording, they will also edit it and create soundbites, only broadcasting fragments of the recording that best fits the story they want to tell the public.

It’s all the same.

6. Why Bullies are Such Good Liars:

They use Charm

We all know that bullies are cowards who hide behind a facade of charm and charisma. But what makes that facade?

What are the exact ingredients that make up the bully’s fake charm?

Understand that bullies are like peacocks. They like to strut around and fan out their tails, showing you their prettiest colors.

They do this to collect admirers, followers, and allies. That’s exactly what the bully’s fake charm means to do, draw others to them.

Also, this is how bullies dupe everyone into thinking that they’re perfect and can’t be touched. Only you know what’s behind the facades. Victims are always aware of the real people behind the masks bullies don.

7. They build carefully crafted images.

Impeccable Attire.

Most seasoned and well-practiced bullies dress in the best and latest fashions. These people love to be pleasing to the eyes. Why? Because they understand that most people are materialistic and beauty-obsessed, and everything is based on appearances.

So, they wear the fanciest clothes, the trendiest hairstyles, the best makeup, etc.

They show these things off to give the appearance that they’re rolling in money. Also, they want to give the impression that their life is perfect to impress others. Most of all, bullies also do it to one-up others!

And here’s something else! Many of my bullies didn’t have a pot to pee in or a window to throw it out. Not that being poor makes a person bad, but!

Why Bullies are Such Good Liars:

Many bullies go broke just to keep up appearances.

Most bullies will go flat broke buying fancy clothes and sporty cars to pimp around town in. And they’ll do it just to keep up a fake persona.

However, they’ll be up to their eyeballs in debt. Many of them have a hard time paying their bills. They’re the types who will run to mommy and daddy for bailouts and handouts.

And it’s all because they spend a fortune on clothes, hairstyles, manicures, pedicures, facials, cosmetic surgeries, you name it!

As a result, many workplace bullies who commit crimes such as theft, embezzlement, and forgery. Why? Because they live way beyond their means and got their butts in a crack they can’t get out of.

And they eventually get caught!

8. They put on a good show.

Seasoned bullies are also the best showmen. They put on an act to gain admiration, support, or sympathy. They make grand gestures.

They’re good at reading everyone else and finding out their likes and dislikes and how they react to certain stimuli. They make themselves aware of the people and moods around them, then adapt to them.

You’ll often find these bullies standing in the very center of the rooms they’re in. Moreover, they’re the types who despise being outshone, outsmarted, or outdone.

9. Why Bullies are Such Good Liars:

They’re master wordsmiths.

They use clichés, euphemisms, and loaded words to impress others with their speech. Moreover, they use big words to prove how smart they are when, in reality, they’re as incompetent as they come.

They also tell others what they want to hear. This is why they’re such convincing liars and why they’re so good at making you look like the bad guy.

But here’s something else you need to know.

Although seasoned bullies are very popular among people, they’re also hated and feared by rivals and enemies. And they do eventually get brought down. I’ve seen it happen many times.

Julius Caesar was one such example.

“Caesar had his Brutus and Charles I, his Cromwell…” – Patrick Henry.

In Closing

Bullies are fake. Period. Full stop! And, they have been for so long that they’ve become experts at fooling people. In fact, it’s how they gain power.

And it’s how they’re able to pass themselves off as fake friends to unsuspecting victims.

It’s also why they get away with much of their bullying.

Therefore, learn all the tools they use and you’ll be onto them. I promise you!

This post is all about why bullies are such good liars so that you can know how they do it and see behind the fake masks they wear.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How Bullies Gain Power: 9 Astonishing Ways They Do It.

2. Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying? 15 Must-Know Answers 

3. Fake Friends: 13 Surefire Signs They Don’t Like You for You

what bullies hate most about you

What Bullies Hate Most: 9 Things Bullies Despise

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‘Want to know what bullies hate most? Here are all the things bullies despise so that you’ll have something to feel good about and use against them.

what bullies hate most

There are things bullies absolutely despise and if you know how to use it against them, you’ll make yourself less a victim.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about what bullies hate most so that you can use it to protect yourself.

Once you learn about these game-changing details, you will be a force to be reckoned with the next time your bullies come for you.

This post will tell you exactly what bullies hate most so that you can use it to your advantage and be less of a target to them.

What Bullies Hate Most

Let’s get right into it! Here are all the things bullies hate most.

1. Constructive Criticism

Bullies don’t take constructive criticism very well. They only take it as a personal attack. Remember that bullies are highly egocentric.

They must always be right about everything. Moreover, if they can’t be right, they’ll make it look as if they are. This is how bullies hide beneath a veneer of total perfection.

But why do they do this? For several reasons.

  • They do it to make themselves look better than they really are.
  • The facade of perfection fools people and attracts followers and admirers.
  • Perfection also protects bullies from accountability and shields them from reproach.
  • Bullies can use their so-called perfection as a weapon against their victims.
  • It gives them status and social capital.
  • It gives them the attention.

Understand that when you give bullies any criticism, constructive or otherwise, they see it as an insult to their intelligence. Moreover, it shatters their fake facade.

Again, bullies hate being told they’re wrong about anytime. Therefore, if you want to expose them, tell them they’re wrong. Then, stand back and watch the fireworks!

2. What Bullies Hate Most:

You Countering Their Attacks

It’s because any time you counter a bully, you restore the balance of power. In other words, you take back your personal power, the very thing your bullies are trying to take from you.

You’ll throw them into panic mode. Why? Because, if they lose power over you, they  lose power over everyone and everything.

Moreover, when someone loses power, they lose face. Also, they lose respect. And when they lose respect, they lose credibility, allies, and support.

Then, they will become the bullied. ‘You see? Bullies have an obsessive fear of going from being the hunters to being hunted.

And why not? You aren’t the only person they’ve bullied. There were many others before you. Bullies know that most average people hate people like them. Also, they know that most others are just itching to see them get what’s coming to them.

Everyone loves to see a bully get brought down. And once a bully is brought down, no one will ever allow them to get back up again.

You become a threat to your bullies’ power.

This is why your bullies will pull out all the stops to keep you under their control. If they can’t control you, they control nothing.

Most people are still under the presumption that targets are weak. Therefore, if your bullies can no longer dominate you, others will notice.

And, chances are, the bullies will be at everyone else’s mercy.

In other words, bystanders will look at them and think, “Wow! If they can’t handle a wimp like her then he really couldn’t handle me! This is a juicy opportunity! I can punk this creep out so easily!”

Your bullies then become the new men on the bottom. Gasp!

Why? Because if you can’t overpower the weakest person in the bunch, then you become the new weakest person! Ouch! Talk about a humbling situation!

3. What Bullies Hate Most:

People Who Prefer to be Themselves

Bullies are fake. They have to be to instill fear in those around them. Therefore, they resent anyone who’s comfortable in their own skin. Here’s why.

1. Most bullies are highly insecure

In fact, they’re more insecure than others. When you prefer to be yourself, you’re naturally more charming, seductive, and graceful.

You captivate others without trying. Because of your openness and fluidity, you draw others to you like a magnet.

Bullies are jealous of anyone who enjoys good relations with others.

Not only are bullies insecure, they’re also vain. When you’re authentic, you outshine them without even trying. In fact, your presence, alone, makes your bullies appear less alluring to others.

Therefore, avoid these bullies like the plague. Why? Because they will find a way to destroy you if you stay around them.

They’ll only force you to suppress your natural charm and goodness. And they’ll do it to keep you from looking like you’re better than them.

2. What Bullies Hate Most:

When you chose to be yourself, you don’t have to make any effort to put on a show.

Everything you say and do comes natural. On the other hand, being fake requires a lot of work. There are also a lot of worries that go with it.

 As mentioned earlier, bullies are fake. Therefore, they fear they might slip up and expose themselves somehow. Then, their personalities just might seep through.

Here’s another reason bullies hate you for being yourself. They resent the fact that you don’t have to work and worry like they do.

But no matter what these idiots may throw at you, never be afraid to be yourself. Never hide anything about you.

Why? Because you’ll only lose a bit of yourself each time you put on an act until you lose yourself entirely.

To be fake, you have to work too hard. So, be lazy!

3. What Bullies Hate Most:

Targets They Can’t Manipulate

It’s the oldest and most used tactic in the book! If they can’t manipulate you, they’ll will hate you. My classmates were no different.

Moreover, bullies will always come back at you with the “mentally imbalanced” label. And they do this to discredit you and control how others see you.

 But see this for what it is. It’s a desperate attempt to get you back under their control. Bullies also do this when they can’t find anything else to pin on you.

It only goes to show that they see you as a threat and they’re both desperate and afraid. When you refuse to be manipulated, it sends several messages to your bullies. And these messages threaten their sense of superiority.

  1. It tells them that you see through their smokescreens.
  2. It tells them that you’re not afraid to tell them to go kick rocks.
  3. It tells them the opposite of what they think of you- that you’re strong and intelligent, not weak and clueless.
  4. It puts them in their place.
  5. It tells them that they can’t make you do anything you don’t want to do.
  6. It lets them know that you don’t give a crap about what they say or think about you.
  7. It tells them you could care less about impressing them.
  8. It tells them they don’t matter to you and that you don’t value their insults or do you accept their definitions of you.

Understand that bullies have an over-inflated sense of their own importance. Therefore, they feel entitled. Your bullies despise being told no and they loathe anyone who will not be controlled.

If they can’t manipulate you, they’ll manipulate your relationships, and the way others look at you.

5. Your Confidence

Bullies despise any confidence you have. Why? Because when you’re confident, you believe in yourself. Therefore, you don’t let others define who you are.

Confidence is your first line of defense against bullying. It naturally buffers your self-esteem for personal attacks.

Therefore, you’re more likely to tell your bullies where to stick it when they try to mess with you. And that’s a huge threat to their power.

They may try to push you around one time. But it will be the only time they do it.

It pays to love yourself even when it seems others don’t.

6. What Bullies Hate Most:

Being Called Out

They really hate it when you call them out in public!

Any time you call your bullies out on their bullshit, you expose them in front of any bystanders. Moreover, you do it right to their faces.

Understand that bullies have big egos. And when you call them out, you deflate their egos like popping a balloon!

Also, if there are any witnesses present, you humiliate them. You make them look like weak little punks! And others will notice it and they’ll laugh at them.

They may not laugh right then but once they get off somewhere away from the bullies, they’ll laugh about it behind their backs. And bullies instinctively know this because they’d do the same if they saw it happen to someone else.

7. Being Proven Wrong

For example, you’ve entered a contest and your bullies tell you that you’re going to lose. You ignore them and continue your plans to be in the competition. And you end up winning!

Therefore, you showed them up! Bullies despise it when you prove them wrong. Why? Because you force them to back peddle.

Bullies hate it when you feed them a plate of crow. Therefore, don’t be surprised if they try to get back at you for it.

8. What Bullies Hate Most:

Being Exposed.

Bullies despise it when someone rips their masks off. Especially if that person is you! Understand that they have an image to keep up.

And if you poke holes in their image, look out!

9. Being Stood Up To

This goes back to number two. Again, when you stand up to your bullies, you automatically restore the balance of power.

In that, you put your bullies in a weak position. Therefore, expect them to retaliate against you. Realize that bullies will do anything to restore their sense of superiority.

So, be prepared to dig in your heels until your bullies give up and go find another victim.

This post is all about what bullies hate most so that you can use it to defend yourself against them.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Jealousy and Bullying: 7 Proven Signs Your Bullies are Jealous

2. Standing Up to Bullies: 7 Ways Bullies React When You Stop Taking Their Crap

3. Your First Line of Defense Against Bullying

4. Loving Yourself in an Environment that Hates You

nosy bullies at school

Nosy Bullies: 11 Reasons Bullies Pry into Your Private Business

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‘Want to know all about nosy bullies? Here are all the reasons bullies keep their noses stuck in your business.

nosy bullies

When you’re a victim of bullying, your bullies will watch you closely, clocking every move you make. Bullies love to stick their big noses into your business. For people who hate the very air you breathe, they seem awful interested in the details of your life.

Have you ever wondered why?

In this post, you will learn all about nosy bullies and why they pry into your business so that you will gather the courage to tell these snoops to mind their own damn business.

Once you learn all about these important facts, you will be able to better defend yourself against these types of bullies and preserve your privacy.

This post is all about nosy bullies to give you a peek into their minds and use the information to protect your precious privacy.

Nosy Bullies

If you’re a victim of bullying, you’ve probably wondered why your bullies can’t keep their big, fat noses out of your personal life.

You have the nosy classmate who’s never short of personal and intimate questions about your private life. Maybe, you’re having problems with the  workplace gossip who never shuts up and always seems to know your business before you do.

Or, you know the spying neighbor across the street who forever peers through her window to spy on the neighbors outside.

Whoever they are, they’re bullying the crap out of you. Moreover, these kinds of bullies can be a real hemorrhoid when you want to be left alone and live your life in peace.

Here are all the reasons your bullies can’t stop spying on you. Moreover, they’re the same reasons your bullies ask you such personal questions.

1. Your bullies want to get information they can use against you later.

Most nosy people are, in fact, gossips, busybodies and buttinskies.

A nosy bully may ask you how much you get paid every week.  I know. The nerve! Right? However, you must know why they ask you this question.

They’re trying to gauge whether they should feel jealous of you or better than you. For instance, if your income is low, than they can feel better than you and use the information to ridicule you.

If your income is high, they’ll be jealous of you and talk smack about you just to bring you down a few notches.

Therefore, if someone asks you such personal questions, politely tell them that they’re getting too personal. Let them know in no uncertain terms that you don’t share such private information with anyone.

Then walk away and never have anything to do with this person.

2. Nosy Bullies:

They personally want to see you mess up.

Bullies will watch you closely, waiting with bated breath, for you to screw up somehow. Moreover, they’ll listen in on your conversations, hoping you’ll say the wrong things.

We all make blunders every now and them. You will too, eventually. And your bullies will be right there to pick it up and use your gaffe against you.

Realize that bullies love to see you goof because it gives them the ammo they need to ridicule you with.

3. To see who you associate with.

If you’re a victim of bullying, your bullies will want to know who you associate with. Why? Because they want to know who to turn against you.

Think about it. A salesperson must know who his target audience is. It’s the same with bullies. They need to know who to target with their smear campaigns against you.

4. For gossip.

Gossip is purely judgmental and includes hasty generalizations about your character and private life. The purpose of gossip is to control your status by demoting you on the social hierarchy.

Another purpose is to justify bullying you by convincing others that you don’t deserve respect.

Also, it tightens group connections. And it gives higher status to the people who are privy to the negative information. Moreover, it sets expectations in the group as to how they should treat you.

Through gossip, the group establishes, maintains, or changes social infrastructures. Gossip promotes unity and shared enmity. With the use of it, the group will foster justification for hostility.

Therefore, it gives bullies a way to feel better about abusing you. Why? Because they can say that you deserve it and that they were reacting to “an evil enemy.”

Your bullies may tell others to keep it secret. However, they also ask others to inform them of any new information and updates about you.

Realize that gossip provides bullies reaffirmations that they’re right about you.

5. Nosy Bullies:

They want to find your weaknesses.

You can’t find your enemy’s vulnerabilities unless you get information on them. Therefore, this is another reason your bullies ask personal questions and watch you closely.

Once they find your weak spots, they can easily weaponize them.

6. For future blackmail (leverage).

If your bullies want to make you do something you don’t want to do, they can use anything negative information they find.

For instance, you’re a successful businessman who has to travel frequently. During one of your out of town trips, you cheated on your wife a few years ago.

She still doesn’t know about it. However, your bullies catch wind of it. Later, they decide they want to make you do something that’s against the best interests of you and your business.

Therefore, they threaten to tell your wife all about it if you don’t do what they want you to do.

7. To humiliate you.

Your bullies will ask you some of the most embarrassing questions.

  • “Have you started your period yet?”
  • “Are you a virgin?”
  • “How is your boyfriend in bed?”

The audacity of them will leave you scratching your head because you just can’t believe that anyone would have the chutzpah. Especially if you were raised to mind your own business

Moreover, these kinds of questions will make you cringe! They might even upset you. You may tell them to get a life or just storm off without saying anything to them.

However, the best way to handle these people is to  laugh, make fun of and humiliate them. And enjoy it.

I guarantee you that if you handle it like this, your bullies will never do it again!

8. Nosy Bullies:

For revenge.

Bullies often want to get back at you because they feel you slighted them somehow in the past. Therefore, they’ll dig for any dirt they can find about you.

And, once they find it, they will spread it around just to teach you a lesson.

9. To sow discord between you and others.

Nosy bullies love sowing discord among other people. They just can’t seem to get enough drama. In fact, they thrive on it.

These individuals always have their ear cocked, listening in on your conversations with others. They listen specifically for anything you might say about someone else.

Why? So they can go back to the person you’re talking about and tell them what you’re saying about them.

In fact, what you say may be innocent enough. You may be legitimately concerned about Kathy’s health and may be talking to mutual friends of you both. And these friends may be equally concerned.

However, once your bullies overhear all of you talking, they’ll go back to Kathy and tell her only the parts that suit them. In other words, they’ll twist the story to make it look like you and the rest of her friends have evil intentions behind it.

And before you know it, all hell breaks loose.

Bullies get a kick out of watching others tear each other down. The more they stir shit, the more it stinks. And the more it stinks, the better they smell.

Therefore, the next time someone tries to turn you against a friend, ask yourself who the division would benefit most. You, your friend or the instigator?

Also., you can ask the same question if someone tries to turn a friend against you.

10. Nosy Bullies:

For cheap thrills.

Bullies may ask you personal questions because they know that you don’t know any better. This often happens to victims who are on the Autism spectrum.

Evil creeps ask them embarrassing questions because anyone with ASD likely doesn’t realize they’re humiliating. Therefore, when they answer innocently, the bullies get to watch the person unknowing humiliate themself.

The bullies then get their fun out of it, laughing and ridiculing the person.

11. Just to have power over you.

Make no mistake! Any time, a nosy person searches for intimate details about your life, the end goal is power and control!

In other words, their having a constant nose stuck in your private business can be a form of attempted control.

Why? Because they can’t seem to control their own lives. Therefore, they wish to control yours. And they do it for nothing more than to cause an annoyance or embarrassment.

Even in the adult world, you’re going to have people who have more nerve than a bad tooth. In other words, there will be those who will pry into your business and openly ask you embarrassing questions.

Therefore, you might as well prepare for it now. Why? Because these kids of creeps are everywhere!

How can nosy bullies be so brazen with their questions?

When these idiots ask you such personal questions, they may shock the living crap out of you. After all, you’re the type who knows that asking such questions is shameful.

Here’s why some people have no shame in their intrusiveness.

Most of them are raised in nosy families.

In other words, many of these people had parents who were the same way. They had mothers and grandmothers who would tell them to watch others and report back to them.

I know this because, years ago, I had a next door neighbor who was the same way. We all nicknamed her, “Mrs. I-Spy.”

This woman would sit on her front porch and watch who came in and out of the other neighbors’ houses. She would even have her ten-year-old granddaughter watch everyone, then report back to her.

Therefore, nosiness is generational and tends to run in families.

How do nosy bullies get you to talk?

They Air their dirty laundry to get you to air yours.

Beware the big mouth who airs their dirty laundry.

If you’re a target of bullying, another type of person you should be aware of is the big mouth. These people give you their own personal details, hoping that you’ll give them some of yours.

However, be forewarned! If they tell their private business, they’ll tell yours too.

Here are the red flag topics they talk about.

  •  Their messy home life.
  • A philandering husband.
  • Their lazy wife who keeps a nasty house.
  • Unruly and disrespectful kids they might have.
  • Getting toilet-hugging drunk at a bar.
  • Intimate details about their sex life (Yikes!).
  • Details about their bodily functions (Yuck! Gross! Barf!).

Again, if they will trumpet embarrassing details about their own lives, you can bet dollars to doughnuts they’ll talk about yours. Therefore, keep your private business to yourself!

Any personal details about themselves that make you want to “call Ralph,” should especially make you want to run for your life!

Therefore, avoid these people at all costs. Not only will they embarrass the crap out of you, but they’ll dig for information about you that’s equally humiliating.

In Closing

Those who are nosy are usually toxic people.

Be aware that your bullies may not be so blatant with their personal questions. Many may be subtle and you might mistake it for curiosity instead of nosiness.

Nevertheless, realize that anybody who openly asks you such personal questions about your life has no respect for you. Therefore, politely end the conversation, and excuse yourself.

In fact, you should wave these morons away like that pesky little fly that keeps buzzing around your face.

And you don’t have to get angry with them. Just shake your head and pity them. Because it’s those types who really need to get a life.

Or, if you’re a smart-ass like I am, take the opportunity to have a little fun with them. Just catch it, throw it back at them and shame them with it. And why not? They asked for it.

This post was all about nosy bullies, their shameful questions, and why they ask them so that you know what to look for and how to respond.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Curiosity vs Nosiness: 3 Must-Know Differences to Learn

2. Signs of a Smear Campaign: 3 Indicators of Relational Bullying

3. 25 Signs of a Toxic Person

why do bullies get away with bullying at work

Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying? 15 Must-Know Answers

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Why do bullies get away with bullying? ‘Want all the answers to this question? Here are all the answers you’ve been searching for.

why do bullies get away with bullying

Most bullies get away with their behavior and it’s a fact we all need to face. They have a knack with escaping accountability and making you look like the bad guy.

Therefore, in this post, you will get all the answers to the question, “Why do bullies get away with bullying.”

Once you learn all about these important details, you will be better able to outflank your bullies when they try to lay the blame on you.

This post will give you all the answers to the frequently asked question, “Why do bullies get away with bullying,” so that you can use this information to your advantage.

Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?

Every victim has at some point asked either themselves or another person these questions.

  • “Why am I always to blame?”
  • “Why do my tormentors always get away with abusing me?”
  • “Why do bullies get away with bullying?”

Here are the answers, and there are many.

1. Bullies are notorious suck-ups.

They have a knack for appealing to those in authority and winning them over to their side. Understand that these types of people are very convincing liars. They use charm and allure to disarm anyone in authority.

Also, most people in authority love it when people suck up to them. And bullies instinctively know this. Therefore, they will eagerly kiss ass if it gets them what they want.

 Because they kiss the right butts, supervisors, managers, and HR are more likely to overlook their rotten behavior. They also tend to thumb rides on others’ coattails.

Moreover, in school, bullies often suck up to teachers, principals, and school officials.

Sucking up is one of the reasons they gain power.

2. Why Do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?

They’re High Performers and scholars.

Many school bullies also impress school staff with academic excellence and being stars of the sports teams. In that, they make the school look good.

Therefore, the school is less likely to punish them. Instead, they’ll accuse you of picking on them.

3. They know people in high places.

Add that to their parents having connections with town and city big-shots, and they have the freedom to bully at will.

Why? Because people will be too afraid to hold them responsible for anything. They fear that their big connections just might come after them.

4. Bullies are convincing liars.

They’ve been lying and covering up bad behavior all of their lives. They have been doing this for long enough that they have learned what works and what doesn’t.

Therefore, they are master manipulators who have great skill in the arts of deception.
You must realize that these types are also very good at rationalizing and justifying their unacceptable behavior.

They are wordsmiths and con artists, who often use charm to deceive those in authority.

5. Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?

They’re masters at projection.

In other words, they project all their faults and shortcomings onto their victims. In doing this, they successfully reverse the roles, making you look like the bully and themselves the victim.

Anytime these abusers face possible accountability for their evil actions, they often cry those crocodile tears to feign victim-hood. This tactic is usually employed by females.

6. They’re charming to the right people.

Consequently, they can use this as another weapon against a victim. Bullies seem to emit an oozing charm. Nevertheless, they have a way of winning people over and making them their allies.

“How are these people able to use their good reputations as weapons?” You may wonder. Here’s a simple explanation.

When the bully has a good name among the majority, it’s much easier for her to fool everyone except you. Others find it hard to believe that “this sweet, innocent, pretty little girl” would harm anyone.

Moreover, take a look at the outgoing guy that everyone loves. No one is going to believe that this “fine young man” would ever beat up a smaller boy unless he was provoked.

7. Because they have so many friends who cherish them.

And the sad reality is this. Even if the bully’s friends did witness them attack you, their loyalty will override their sense of right and wrong. Therefore, these friends will lie for them to hide their bad behavior and place the blame on you.

8. Why Do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?

There is strength in numbers.

Unfortunately, most bullies have a large number of friends behind them. And people in large numbers wield a cumulative power that can be overwhelming for victims.

In other words, if enough people actively hate a certain person, that person is powerless, no matter how strong, smart, beautiful, or easy-going they may be.

9. They use gaslighting to keep you silent.

They’re good at placing the blame on you to make you feel like you did something wrong by defending yourself. Bullies may also lay guilt trips or hurl insults at you.

Also, they try to convince you that it’s your own fault or that the abuse is just your imagination.
Bullies are masters at this, especially females who use feminine charm to deceive bystanders and authority figures.

They will deny their abuse and trivialize everything you are experiencing. “Don’t believe your eyes, ears, nor how you feel. You’re too sensitive.”

And the most effective tactic is to make you look like you have a mental imbalance. Why? Because the tough reality is that there’s nothing that will discredit you more than the mental illness label.

10. Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?

They malign you to destroy your reputation.

They’ll recruit followers and start a campaign of hate and viciousness against you. They will spread rumors and lies about you to turn everyone against you.

Moreover, they’ll even turn your friends against you if they can.

It happens in school, the workplace, and in communities. Many times, this is how bad people retaliate against victims who have the gall to stand up to them.

Bullies hate it when you refuse to take their abuse.

11. They appeal to the self-interests of the school or workplace.

For example, the bullies may excel academically or be stars of one of the school’s sports teams. You must realize that schools have a vested interest in their sports teams and want to win championships.

Why? Because it boosts the school’s image. Also, if the school has a low number of dropouts and high graduation rate, this also reflects highly on the school.

Schools also get recognition for cranking out college-bound graduates. This adds to a schools good reputation.

And if the school has a great reputation, the larger number of students in attendance. Moreover, more parents want their kids to go to this school.

Additionally, the more students a school has, the more federal and state funds they get.
Do you see where I’m going with this?

So, right or wrong, the school won’t take your word over those of its brightest stars and highest achievers.

I want you to realize that in most cases of bullying, it’s not about who’s right or wrong. It’s about which people have the most power.

Again, most care less about right and wrong. What they care about is power and how you can benefit them in some way, shape, or form.

“What’s in it for me?”

12. Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?

They’re good at victim-blaming.

Evil people will blame you to protect one another from accountability. Moreover, they do it to protect their reputations.

Here’s something to think about. Most students in school get into two, maybe three fights in their entire twelve years of school. This sounds perfectly normal.

However, too many fights and people will likely label you a troublemaker. Teachers and school staff will see you as a problem child. And this goes whether or not your harassers provoked you.

Destroying your name with the school lessens your chances any chances of anyone listening to you. Your abusers can’t have you running and snitching.

Therefore, they may hit you first just to provoke you to fight. As soon as you hit back in self-defense, the bully draws everyone’s attention to you. And they make it look like you started it.

No one sees them hit you first. But they conveniently catch the tail end of it, when you hit back. Understand that this is how bullies set the stage.

The do this to protect themselves from discipline at school or work. Whereas, you get a bad reputation. Thus, it gives them the freedom to bully you again later.

This is also meant to silence you and make you afraid to report them or speak out about the harassment.

When people give you a bad rap, people won’t believe you when you try to get help.

Bystanders and people in authority will only think,

  • “Why would so many kids have it in for her if she’s not provoking them somehow?”
  • “Nobody likes him, so there has to be a reason that justifies it.”
  • “She’s a lowlife, so she deserves it!”

Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?

Where there’s smoke, there’s fire.

People with bad reputations are the easiest to point the guilty finger at anytime a confrontation arises.

In other words, if people expect trouble to come from a certain place, that is where they’re going to look. Therefore, who’s going to look any further than the child with the worst reputation at school? Who’s going to look anywhere else other than the employee who isn’t a team player?

If you’re the one others suspect, the bullies get off scot-free.
Again, they provoke you to manipulate school staff and save their behinds from having to face repercussions.

Therefore, you don’t only need the confidence to fight bullying. You also need to know all about these types of people and how they operate.

The first step of defense is knowing the mindsets and intentions of bullies and the tactics they use.

13. Relationship is the determiner in many cases of bullying

Many times, if you’re a target of such torment, whether people believe you or not depends on their relationship with you and your abuser.

If the bully is someone they either like or love, they’ll act out of loyalty and take their word over yours. It won’t matter that the other person is in the wrong.

In fact, people may know the person is wrong. They may even witness the person’s bad behavior.

However, they’ll still may take that person’s side because that’s their friend or family member. Another possibility will be that they they dislike or may even hate them. But they dislike or hate you even more.

Therefore, they choose who they perceive to be the lesser of two evils. People tend to believe those they care about the most and disbelieve those they care about the least.

14. Why Do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?

They feign sympathy and compassion for you in front of others.

It’s not easy for people to distinguish between the real bully and the victim. Bad people are good at making you look guilty.

They show only you the worst, most brutal, and evil sides of themselves. And they do it all while showing everyone else their best, sweetest, and most loving halves of their personalities.

Fake sympathy and false compassion are powerful weapons for bullies!

They may tell others, “I feel so terrible for Jackie. I sincerely hope she gets the help she needs before it’s too late.”

These types of people very sweetly accuse their victims of attacking them when it’s the exact opposite. Therefore, they can easily confuse people, causing them to not know who did what to who. This is one reason it’s so easy to blame the wrong person.

15. They’re are in positions of power.

Anytime you’re up against people in powerful positions, it only multiplies an already bad situation. Why? Because people tend to listen to those in power.

Their positions alone give them credit, even if they haven’t earned it. Sadly, people tend to follow these types of people blindly.

My advice to you is this: It pays to have friends and connections. If you don’t have them, find ways of making them. Do it even if you must establish those connections outside of the toxic workplace or learning environment.

Friends may not be able to help you with your situation in the toxic environment. But what they can do is help you feel better about yourself. Moreover, you won’t feel alone.

Also, establishing connections and relationships now may pay off in the long run. Why? Because if people target you at your job, chances are you won’t be working there for much longer.

And maybe your outside friends and connections just may work at your next job. Therefore, life will be much easier there. And you’re least likely to get blamed if you suffer bullying.

This post gave you all the answers to the question, “Why do bullies get away with bullying” so that you’ll have the knowledge you need to not only feel better, but use to your advantage.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How Bullies Gain Power: 9 Astonishing Ways They Do It.

2. Social Bullying Examples: 7 Reasons Bullies Destroy Relationships

3. Stop Victim Blaming: 8 Reasons People Blame Targets for Bullying

How to Deal with Bullies: 7 Do’s and Don’ts You Need to Know

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‘Want to know how to deal with bullies? There’s a right way and a wrong way to handle them. Here are the 7 do’s and don’ts you need to be aware of.

how to deal with bullies

Bullies have all kinds of tactics in their bag of tricks. They have tactics you probably haven’t thought about yet. Moreover, there’s a wrong and right way to deal with them.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn how to deal with bullies. You will learn the wrong and right ways to handle them so that you know what measures to avoid and which to use.

Once you learn all about this important information, you will be better able to make yourself less a target and handle bullies wisely.

This post is all about how to deal with bullies so that you can take care of yourself in any bullying situation.

How to Deal with Bullies

In order to better know the right ways to handle bullying, you must first know what ways to avoid. Here are the wrong ways of dealing with bullying that you need to know.

The Don’ts:

1. Don’t Ask them, “Why”.

Why? Because they will never tell you why they treat you so inhumanely. Understand that keeping you guessing is half the power bullies have over you.

Bullies are notorious for withholding information. In fact, withholding information is a silent bullying tactic all it’s own. Therefore, they’ll never tell you why they bully you.

In some cases, the bullies, themselves, don’t really know why. However, if they did, they probably wouldn’t tell you the truth.

So, why won’t they tell you the reasons they mistreat you?

Simple. It’s to keep you confused and bewildered. Keeping you befuddled is a power all its own. Because when you’re confused, you can’t think clearly.

And if you can’t think clearly, the less likely you are to figure out what to do to escape the bullies and their abuse. Or worse- how to defend yourself, conquer your bullies, and win your power back.

Keeping you confused is a huge chunk of the power bullies have over you.

Understand that bullies will never relinquish their power. Never! And to be truthful as to why they bully you would be like giving secrets to the enemy.

To be honest and tell you what they hate about you would be like giving their power away to you, and they’ll be damned if they ever!

I want you to know that there’s nothing wrong with you. You must know in your heart that you never did anything to deserve the brutal treatment your bullies continuously dish out to you.

They are the messed up ones. They are the ones with the problem. Moreover, they are the ones who will have to answer for what they’re doing one day, either in this life or the next.

Therefore, instead of focusing your attention on trying to find out why your bullies are giving you problems, focus on self-care.

Instead of asking, “Why me?” ask, “What can I do to take care of myself?” or “What can I do to remove myself from the situation?”

Think about what options you have and weigh each of them carefully. Then quietly begin making plans to get out of there as soon and as safely as possible.

2. How to Deal with Bullies:

Don’t give them any apology. Ever!

For anything!

Why? Because bullies will only see your apologies as weakness. And you can never appease a bully. Realize that when you apologize to a bully, you’re taking responsibility for things that aren’t your fault.

And when you give bullies apologies that are undeserved, you take accountability for their deplorable behavior. Furthermore, you’re giving your bullies exactly what they want and they know it.

Bullies and abusers will try to force you to apologize for something you know isn’t your fault. In other words, they’ll try to make you sorry for things that are beyond your control.

Moreover, they’ll even try and make you apologize for something that doesn’t need an apology. Therefore, respond but don’t apologize.

In other words, don’t say, “I’m sorry,” or “I apologize.”

Here are ways you can respond to bullies who pull this crap. And these are very powerful responses. When you use these, you respond to these bullies without accepting blame. You also respond with strength and power.

  • You’ll get over it.
  • You’ll be alright.
  • By the end of the day, this won’t even matter.
  • It’s no big deal.
  • This isn’t a crisis. Everything’s going to be okay.

3. How to Deal with Bullies:

Don’t explain anything to them.

When having a conversation with bullies and abusers, they will often try to trick you into explaining yourself to them. This is a trap because, no matter how you much explaining you do, they’ll never accept anything you have to say.

It doesn’t matter how logical your explanation may be, bullies will only pretend that they don’t understand. They’ll only keep challenging and criticizing your explanations just to get you to give even more of them.

Know that they do this on purpose.

You must see this tactic for what it is and what it’s meant to do. It’s all designed to throw you off balance. Moreover, bullies want to keep you running in an endless hamster wheel of explanations and justifications.

Therefore, the important thing to bear in mind is that this is a trick! Bullies really don’t need an explanation from you. In fact, they don’t even want one.

They only pretend to want it. What your bullies really want is to bamboozle you and keep you interacting with them.

Why? Because the longer your bullies can keep you engaging with them, the more chances they have to twist the things you say. Then, they can use them as proverbial bullets to fire back at you later.

Therefore, don’t explain a damn thing to them. You must realize that you don’t own them any explanations. You don’t owe them squat!

How to Deal with Bullies:

Do’s

1. Do stand up to them.

You must stand up to bullies. Never ignore them and never handle them with diplomacy or politeness.

Remember that bullies don’t respond to politeness, diplomacy, or pleasantries. They only respond to strength and power. Therefore, you must communicate to them in the only language they understand.

In other words, you must respond with strength and power! And sometimes that means being brutal!

For instance, physical bullies only understand the language of fists. So, you must be prepared to put up your fists and fight if necessary!

2. Gather your own evidence of bullying.

If you’re a victim of bullying, it’s crucial that you get evidence of it. Keep a daily journal and document the bullying, using the 5W Method.

Also, save any electronic evidence of cyberbullying. Why? Because if they bully you at school or work, they’ll probably find you online and bully you there as well.

Therefore, save any mean and threatening texts, emails, social media posts, and private messages on three or more flash drives.

Furthermore, depending on the laws in your state, you may be able to wear a body cam or record the bullying on a digital audio recorder.

And save any medical records and doctor’s reports if you ever need medical attention because of a physical bully.

3. How to Deal with Bullies:

Report the bullying to authorities.

Report the bullying to the principal, human resources, or the police. If the bullying is happening at work, fill out a grievance form. They also have bullying forms at school that you can fill out.

If all else fails, report the bullying to the police and get a restraining order. They may not do anything. However, the idea is to establish a paper trail.

And be sure to get copies of the paperwork. If there are reports on file and copies of them in your possession, you will establish evidence of a pattern of bullying.

This is a must in case you have to take it to court later.

Here’s another thing I want to mention. When you report bullying, schools and workplaces may try to assure you that they’ll do an internal investigation.

However, most of them don’t. And if they do conduct an investigation, it’s usually a sloppy one. This is why you must quietly do your own investigation.

This may require a lot of work on your part. Moreover, you may have to go through many channels. You will need patience because it will take some time.

But when you’re being bullied, you can’t afford to be lazy. Be proactive. Gather your own evidence. Be your own detective. I guarantee you that it will be worth it in the long run!

In Closing:

There are right and wrong ways to handle bullies. However, if you do everything right, you can overcome bullying. And you can emerge a winner!

This post was all about how to deal with bullies so that you can know what to do and what not to do when you encounter bullying.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Bully Proof: 7 Do’s and Don’ts for Victims of Bullying

2. Saying Sorry Too Much: 4 Reasons You Do and How to Stop It

3. The Explaining Trap: 3 Reasons Bullies Set It and How to Respond

People with Negative Energy: How to Protect Yourself from Them

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‘Want to know how to protect yourself from people with negative energy? Here’s all the life-changing information you need to know about.

people with negative energy

You can feel the energy others around you put out, especially if it’s bad energy. Negative energy is contagious and those with it can decide whether we have a bad day or a good day. Thankfully, there are ways you can shield yourself from them.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about people with negative energy and how to protect your own energy from their toxicity.

Once you learn all about this important information, you will be better able to avoid toxic people and the bad energy they put out.

This post is all about people with negative energy and how to avoid letting them suck you into their doldrums.

People with Negative Energy

These kinds of people are everywhere. They’re in our workplaces, schools, churches and neighborhoods. Sadly, they can even live in our homes. Here’s how you avoid such people and keep them from dogging your mood and killing your vibe.

1. Pay Close Attention to Others’ Energy

I’ll start with a personal story. During the six years I endured bullying, I would put up on the vibes of most others at school.

The energy of most of my classmates and a few teachers was bad. However, being a teenager, I knew squat about psychic energy and vibrations.

Back then, no one ever talked about those things. Also, there weren’t many books written on the subject. Not like there are today.

You only heard and read about that gut feeling. Another name for it was the sixth sense. It is this instinct that is triggered by the energy or vibrations the people around us put out.

When I would pick up on the yucky energy my classmates exuded, I would mistake my gut feeling for being overly suspicious. That little voice inside my head would admonish me. It would tell me, “Aw, C’mon! You don’t know that person. Give them a chance.”

Therefore, I would give into that voice. I caved in and gave people chances. However, I ended up paying dearly for it.

Always pay attention to the energy others put out. If a person puts out bad energy, you will feel it in your gut. So, don’t ignore it! Get away from them fast!

2. People with Negative Energy:

Trust your gut instinct.

Self-doubt is a tricky animal. It convinces you to go against your God-given instincts. So, you ignore your innate gut feeling.

In that, you ignore the bad energy you feel when you’re around unsavory people. That’s when you open the door and let evil and nefarious people walk into your life.

If you ignore your gut long enough, you eventually lose the ability to recognize bad energy when you feel it.

‘You see? The ability to pick up on energy is like your muscles. You must exercise it to make it stronger. In other words, if you don’t use it, you lose it!

Your God-given gut instinct is the last thing that you want to atrophy. In this mixed-up world, you cannot afford for it to weaken.

Therefore, trust your gut, especially if you’re a target of bullying! Moreover, never allow others to convince you that you’re a mental case for following your intuition.

If you pick up bad energy from the people around you, you must get away from them, if possible. So, don’t walk. Run!

Minding your Own Energy Output

Just the same, you should mind your own energy. Bullies are experts at picking up on other’s energy and they trust their instincts.

In fact, they never even question them. Why do you think bullies are able to weed through large crowds and pick out potential targets with such accuracy?

For example, if you’re a self-conscious and nervous person, you will put out that kind of energy. If you have low self-esteem, your energy will match that.

Therefore, bullies will pick up on it. And, make no mistake, they’ll milk it for all it’s worth!

If nothing else, understand this. Energy never lies! Vibrations never lie! You may be able to talk a good game and be a fine actor. However, people will sense that you’re faking it.

Why? Because your energy will give you away every time!

That’s why it’s so important that you exude confident energy. This is not to say that you still won’t become a target of bullies. However, you will greatly lesson your chances of it.

Know that you have more control over your energy than you realize.

People with Negative Energy:

So, how do you control your energy?

You have the ability to control your emotions and moods. But! How do you do it? Here are several ways.

Listen to positive music

This means opting for upbeat dance music instead of emo rock. You should also listen to songs about dancing or about celebrating and having a good time.

Never listen to songs about negative things. These songs include those about being cheated on by a lover. Songs about violence and ones that bash women are also no-nos.

Also, don’t listen to those about suicide or murder. Remember. You want to listen to songs that uplift your mood, not those that bring you down.

Positive affirmations

Make positive affirmations. This means making positive “I am” statements. Moreover, remind yourself, every day, of your strengths and good qualities only. And do it loudly.

Even if you must look at yourself in the mirror while making these statements. Do it.

Watch a good comedy but no dark comedies.

Watch one that is fun. Do this to make yourself laugh because laughter always drives away a crappy mood.

People with Negative Energy:

Surround yourself with positive people who lift you up.

That means staying away from bullies and abusers, people who complain, put you down, or bring you drama. Stay away from anyone who puts you in a foul mood.

Exercise!

Not only is it healthy, but it releases endorphins and makes you feel accomplished.

Focus on everything positive. It won’t be easy and may even feel unnatural at first. However, keep it up and it will get easier with time.

It will begin to feel like second nature once you’ve practiced it long enough.

Remember that energy never lies. You must pay attention to the energy of the people around us and trust your instincts. Moreover, you must also make sure that you, yourself, are putting out positive energy.

3. Listen to Your Gut instinct.

At times in your life, you’ll meet and be around certain people. Your inner alarm will warn you about them.

You may not be able to explain the feeling you get. The only way to describe that gut feeling is that you’ll sense that something is “off” about the people around you.

and I would get a sinking, creepy feeling in the pit of my stomach. I could literally feel the bad vibes that seemed to pour fourth from these people.

However, when you’re young, you’ll often mistake this feeling for paranoia and ignore it. This is something that a whopping majority of bullying victims do.

And it’ll prove to be to your disappointment every time! But if you listen to your gut and avoid these people, you’ll save yourself a truckload of heartache.

God gave you your gut instinct for a reason. Anytime you get a bad feeling in your gut about someone, you’re picking up on their energy.

Moreover, if you pay close attention to it, you’ll know when someone means you no good. And you’ll know when someone is about to hurt you.

4. People with Negative Energy:

Let your instinct guide you.

If you listen to your instincts, you’ll be able to make good choices. On the other hand, you’ll only make poor decisions if you ignore it.

Moreover, you’ll become a very mean and vicious person just to keep people away. As a result, you just might repel the people who have your best interests at heart.

You’ll run off genuine people who would otherwise become your friends. And you’ll miss out on opportunities for friendship.

Why? Because you’ll get to where you won’t trust anyone.

If you don’t trust yourself, you won’t trust anyone else either.

Trusting your gut feeling means trusting yourself. Period.

Lack of trust comes from not knowing how to listen to and trust your gut. Therefore, you think it’s much safer to put up a barrier and keep everyone out.

I realize how scary it is to begin relying on your feelings. Being bullied can very easily cause you not to believe in yourself and your own abilities.

Also, it can enable you to trust your own innate intuition if you let it. As a result, bullies will completely zap you of your sense of who is for real and who is fake.

Bullying causes you to lose your ability to avoid dangerous people. Why? Because they brainwash you into ignoring what you feel.

People with negative energy:

Your Gut Feeling is never wrong.

It helps you identify people with negative energy. In fact, you’ll feel, deep down in your gut, the nasty vibes they exude. Therefore, always listen to your gut feeling because it is never wrong.

And, anyone something about another person feels bad, get rid of them!

Don’t ignore your gut feeling. Never overlook that sinking feeling in your stomach because it could save you from so much trouble. It could even save your life!

Realize that you have more power than you think. It’s up to you to listen to what your gut is trying to tell you and act on it.

No one else can do it for you. You owe it to yourself to avoid anyone who gives you a creepy vibe.

This post is all about how to pick up on people with negative energy so that you can protect yourself from trouble down the road.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Fake Friends: 13 Surefire Signs They Don’t Like You for You

2. 10 Signs of a Toxic Friendship (And How to Cut Ties)

3. Signs of Toxic People: 5 Tell-Tale Indicators

outsmarting bullies at work

Outsmarting Bullies: 3 Clever Ways that Expose Them

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‘Want to know all about outsmarting bullies so you can expose them in less obvious ways? Here are all the details you need to know about.

outsmarting bullies

You can outsmart a bully. However, sometimes, you must think outside the box and get creative to do it.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn the best ways of outsmarting bullies so that you can expose them without looking like you’re exposing them.

Once you learn all about this important information, you will be able to draw your bullies out in the open and protect yourself from them.

Outsmarting Bullies

Sometimes, you must outfox them by drawing them out in the open. For instance, many bullies will pretend to be your friend just so they can get close enough to subtly attack you.

Let’s explain further.

1. To Draw Fake People Out into the Open, Make yourself Appear Weak and Powerless.

You may think you know all the people in our lives, especially those closest to you. However, most people aren’t who they make you think they are.

Therefore, in life, there will be fakers and imposter. There will be people who will infiltrate your inner circle and pretend to be your friends.

These people will latch onto you like a tick to a dog. Then, they’ll get close enough to you to figure out everything about you.

They’ll find all your soft spots. In fact, they’ll ferret out your  intentions, the most intimate details of your life, goals, and dreams.

Once they have all these thing about you, they’ll will work behind the scenes to sabotage and crush you.

But what if I told you that there is a clever way to draw all those rogues out? Moreover, what if I told you that it won’t be an easy thing to do?

In fact, it just might be the hardest thing to do. Why? Because it requires unshakeable confidence and self-belief.

Outsmarting Bullies:

Drawing  an enemy out requires unshakeable confidence.

What do I mean by this? Here it is.

Sometimes, you must play the loser and appear weak to make the people around you feel safe. Only then can you draw them out and trick them into removing their fake husks.

This is what you do anytime you have any shred of doubt about a person in your life.

‘You see? When people feel untouchable, they become brazen, and that is when you see their true nature. Therefore, to make them feel untouchable, you must give them the impression that they’ve already won.

I won’t kid you. This will be hard to do because it will feel like a huge blow to your pride. You’ll be ridiculed, people will gloat, and it won’t feel good at all.

In fact, it’ll feel terrible, even humiliating at times.

This is something most people wouldn’t dream of doing because, as I just mentioned, it’s downright terrifying. Nobody wants to know of any possibility that a long-trusted friend could turn out to be a snake. I get that.

It feels so much safer to live in denial and act as if everything is peachy king. Also, no one wants to look weak. It feels better to appear strong even if you’re not.

It’s a blow to the ego when we’re defeated. Moreover, it feels bad when we aren’t defeated but appear that way to the rest of the world. However, trust me on this.

Outsmarting Bullies:

You never find out who people really are until you’re at your lowest point.

Only when you’re at your lowest do you find out who’s really in your corner.

So, again, if you can make everyone think that you’ve been knocked on your tookus, you’ll be surprised at the snakes who shed their skins and reveal themselves. Moreover, some will be people you’d never expect.

And you don’t realize who your enemies are until the shit hits the fan.

Any time you appear at your weakest, not only will your enemies reveal themselves, they’ll be more emboldened to act against you. And when they do, they’ll do it openly!

Why will these people will be so open with their dirt? It’s because they’ll mistake you for being powerless to fight back.

However, realize that this is the only way you can get rid of all the dead weight. You do it by unmasking it first. After all, you must know who to get rid of before you can do this successfully.

Therefore, if you do this right, you can ensure your peace of mind in the future. In that, you can remove any obstacles to your progress and more easily achieve your goals.

More importantly, you can ensure a better future for yourself.

Therefore, any time you have doubts about a friend or two, make yourself appear weak and down and out. Then watch what they do.

It might not feel good at the time, but you’ll thank yourself later. Moreover, you’ll thank all the fakers for walking into your well-laid trap and showing you what lowlifes, they really are.

You’ll smile and hold your head high as you walk away and discard them into the trash heap of history.

2. Fake a surrender to bullies to trick them into leaving you alone.

Is there ever a time when you should surrender to a bully? The answer is yes! Or, at least, make it look like you’re surrendering to them!

In life, there are times when you should pick and choose our battles. In other words, you must decide when to fight back and when to leave well enough alone.

This is a must when your bullies are extremely powerful. Why? Because it isn’t smart to fight them and give them a chance to defeat you.

Sometimes real power comes with swallowing your pride and giving in to them first. When you do this, you’ll throw them off balance.

Moreover, you’ll enrage them because they were looking for a fight and they were so sure they’d get one. But they didn’t get it.

Outsmarting Bullies:

Don’t fight a battle you can’t win.

There’s no point in fighting an unwinnable battle. Showing weakness can be a strength if you know how to use it correctly.

When you make it look like you surrender, you give yourself time to recuperate and subtly torture and irritate your bullies.

You can sneakily sabotage your bullies in ways they’d never expect nor detect. You can get what you can out of the surrender, then fight later when your bullies aren’t so strong.

Believe it or not, bullies do eventually lose power.

Therefore, you don’t surrender because you give up. You do it to humor your bullies and lull them into a false sense of complacency. You do it to fool them into thinking they’ve won.

Understand that bullies continually try to show dominance and superiority. Therefore, if you make it look like you surrender to them, it’ll be so easy to trick them.

Being submissive to them for the time being satisfies them. Moreover, it makes them feel powerful. In this, the bullies become easier targets for a later countermove.

For example, You surrender, and the bullies let you walk away. But as you turn and walk away, you can cut a silent fart in their general direction.

And they won’t think it came from you. They’ll only be looking at each other and wondering who dealt it.

Silent ridicule works wonders for self-esteem!

3. Bait and trigger your bullies.

This may be scary to do but trust me. Get your bullies angry enough at you and they will come to you. In other words, play on the natural human tendency to react out of anger when pushed or baited.

Get your bullies to react to your moves. Make them pursue you because they only expend their own energy by chasing you. An added benefit to this is that it forces the bullies to act on your terms.

Also, when you trick them into pursuing you, you automatically fool them into thinking they’re controlling the situation.

However, there’s one requirement for this to work:

You must remain calm.

Calmness allows you to think more clearly. Emotions, on the other hand, block your ability to think and strategize effectively.

Outsmarting Bullies:

Lure your bullies to your territory or to neutral ground.

When you get your bullies to come for you, always get them on your territory. If you cannot get them into your element, then choose neutral ground. Never meet bullies on their turf! It’s much too dangerous.

If you can get them on your territory, you’ll keep your bearings while the bullies will be on the defensive. Why? Because they’ll be on unfamiliar ground. They won’t feel you pulling their invisible strings.

Make your bait so sweet that your bullies can’t refuse. Use yourself as bait if necessary. Do this especially if they’re so pissed off at you that they can’t see past their desire to “get you.”

Their intense rage will blind them to reality and they’ll be more than happy to come to where you are.

Moreover, the angrier they are, the more desperate they’ll be to get back at you. Also, the easier they’ll be for you to lead them by the nose. And you’ll lead them right into the trap that you’ve prepared for them.

But do it with caution.

If you can get your bullies to dig their own graves, you’ve already won. To quote Sun Tsu, “Never interfere when an enemy is destroying themselves.”

Weaponize Your Bullies’ Triggers

The trick is to use your bullies’ tactics against them! How you do this is to find what triggers their emotions, then use it to your advantage.

And why not? They’ve been doing the same to you for a long time now, haven’t they? As much as I hate to say it, sometimes you must play the bully’s game if you expect to survive.

I know this isn’t a pleasant place to be. It sucks! But sometimes, you must wade through crap to come out clean on the other side.

Outsmarting Bullies:

So, how do you weaponize your bullies’ triggers?

1. Get them in public.

In other words, get them in front of coworkers and supervisors, or classmates and teachers. Then very sneakily do something you know will trigger them.

Bait them into a reaction. Then stand back and watch with pleasure as the bully yells, screams, curses, and exposes themselves in front of everyone.

If you live in a one-party consent jurisdiction, record the outburst, and if you’re sure it’s safe, blast it all over social media.

2. Befriend others they have bullied (preferably people who’ve been fired or no longer have any contact with the bullies).

Then have them spread it all over social media. Give the bully the reputation they so deserve. Befriending others the bullies has harmed has a way of getting under their skin.

Bullies hate it when you talk to people they hate. Also, they especially hate it when all their victims unite and form a group!

This really ticks them off because, deep down, it intimidates them. Think about it, bullies always run in packs and they catch you when you’re alone.

However, when a group of target victims ban together, the bullies feel threatened. Why? Because they lose power.

Exposure is the best way to conquer bullies! So, out them! Better yet, trick them into outing themselves!

This post is all about outsmarting bullies so that you can expose them for the creeps they are and, at the same time, protect yourself from them.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How to Spot Fake Friends: 7 Proven Tricks to Instantly Out Them

2. 7 Secrets to Instantly Expose Bullies

3. How to Disarm a Bully: 13 Clever Comebacks that Work Wonders

Set Your Own Standards: Never Conform to a Bully’s.

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‘Want to know how to set your own standards and how to keep from conforming to a bully’s standards? Here’s all the information you need to know about.

set your own standards

A bully’s standards are unachievable. No matter what you do, who you are, or what you have; bullies will always move the goalposts. So, what do you do?

In this post, you will learn why it’s always best to set your own standards. Also, you’ll learn to never try to live up to a bully’s standards.

Once you learn all about these facts, you will no longer waste your time and energy tying to reach your bullies’ cookie-cutter versions of perfection. Instead you will be confident in your own way of life.

This post is all about the reasons you should set your own standards so that you will be yourself and be confident about refusing to follow anyone else’s lead.

Set Your Own Standards

Bullies change the rules just to find something else to use against you. Bullies will even weaponize your best qualities.

Therefore, you should always be yourself, no matter how difficult it may be. Don’t change for anyone. Realize that anytime you conform to someone else’s standards, you only lower your own.

Don’t change the way you dress, your interests, etc.

Bullies will often make fun of the way you dress- even if you dress fashionably. Understand that with bullies, it’s not about the way you dress.

Moreover, it’s not about your hair, makeup, your attire, hobbies, favorite music, your family, or anything they make fun of. No!

‘Want to know what it’s about?

Its about power and control.

It’s about having the power to make you feel bad about yourself.  Also, it’s about taking away your confidence, your pride, your happiness, your health, peace of mind, everything that matters.

Therefore, don’t give them that power.

Set Your Own Standards:

Don’t change your personality.

We all have quirks. Therefore, never change your personality. Continue to be yourself.

Realize that anything you change to appease a bully today will be ridiculed tomorrow. Again, bullies have a desire to control you to get that ego boost they’re seeking.

So, understand that they get their kicks from making you jump through hoops to win their approval. And you know what?

You don’t need their approval.

Just continue to be yourself and calmly blow the bullies off. Eventually, they’ll get bored and find another target.

Only you know what you like and don’t like. Only you can know what feels right to you and what’s best for you.

Therefore, don’t sell yourself short by living up to someone else’s expectations. They don’t know you the way you do. Realize that you’re a separate person from them.

Always remember that.

When Bullies Move the Goalposts

Understand that bullies will always judge you and they will do it by default. In other words, they’ll judge you without provocation.

You won’t need to do, wear, or say anything wrong because they will dissect everything until they find something wrong. Moreover, just your mere presence alone will invoke their judgements and attacks.

But know this. The negative suggestions and personal attacks they hurl are strictly to control you. That’s right. They insult you to control you.

Realize that bullies want to make you think, feel, and act the way they want you to. Nothing more. Also, those judgements, insults, and personal attacks come from a place of entitlement.

Therefore, you must realize that your bullies will not be happy with you. And they won’t accept you, no matter what you do.

Any efforts to win their approval will be like pouring water into a sieve.

Set Your Own Standards:

Remember! It’s all About Control!

How many attempts to satisfy these bullies are you willing to make before you become exhausted? How long are you willing to shapeshift and bend yourself into a pretzel?

What’s it going to take before you realize that conforming and adapting to their standards of who you should be will never yield the desired results?

You’ll only end up disheartened in the end. Why? Because, just as you can never fill a sieve, you can never appease a bully.

So, stop wasting your time and energy. And stop sacrificing your happiness because these people aren’t worth the powder to blow them up.

When you don’t stand up for yourself, others will only see you as an easy person and lose respect for you. The amount of crap you put up with only determines how others treat you in the future.

In other words, you teach people how to treat you by what you do or don’t put up with. And when you conform to the standards of others, you only discard your own standards.

Be Yourself in Every Way!

Isn’t it time you lived up to your own? Isn’t it time you begin living life on your own terms instead of someone else’s?

Your choices, your likes, your preferences, your pleasures, and your happiness should never depend on the permission of another.

Therefore, you must always be yourself. This means that you must have your own opinions, likes, dislikes, and preferences.

Also, you must do the things you love most, no matter what others think. Be yourself in every way!

Set Your Own Standards:

Whose Life Are You Living? Yours or Theirs?

Uh-oh! Here they go again! It seems that every time you as much as blink, someone else has got their honker in your business.

They’re always telling you how you ought to do things. Always dictating how you should act! These creeps even tell you how you should live your life!

These chumps! They have the chutzpah to think they can make your decisions for you. But, let’s face it, the world is full of nosy people.

If you are a target of bullying, you will have others trying to invade your life. Your personal business, and your boundaries are fair game.

And let me tell you, when it seems that no one will let you lead your own life in peace, life can go from enjoyable to unbearable real quick. This is why you must be assertive in cases like this.

Understand that you can’t please everyone and you shouldn’t even try to.

You don’t mind because they don’t matter.

Put simply, the only ones you must live your life for is God, your family, your closest and most trusted friends, and yourself.

Too many people care what the wrong people think of them. The wrong people! In other words, bullies, toxic people and those they don’t like!

Realize that you aren’t living their life, you’re living yours. Therefore, you must make decisions that best fit the situations and circumstances surrounding your life.

Set Your Own Standards:

You must do what’s best for you, not what’s best for them!

You must do what’s best for you, not what’s best for them, or, rather, what others want you to do. Half the time, they don’t even know what they want nor what’s best for them.

So, how can they claim to know what’s best for you if they haven’t a clue what’s best for their own lives?

You must do what makes you healthier, what makes you feel good, and what makes you whole. You must do what fulfills you, not other people. Don’t worry about them.

It’s up to them to make their lives easier and pleasant. It’s not your responsibility. Just the same, it’s up to you to make your life better, it’s not their place to do it.

There will always be others who want to insert their two cents where it isn’t needed.  And they’ll be downright abusive about it. They’ll attempt to order you around or deride you over your life-decisions.

You must open your mouth and tell these creeps where to shove it.

There will be those who will try to run your life and you should be prepared for it. But know that when they do this, they’re stepping out of their place. And you have every right to tell them to go kick rocks.

The old, popular 1990’s idiom, “All up in your koolaid and don’t know the flavor” wasn’t coined for nothing. And the sad thing is that most people don’t bother to lend a hand but they’re real quick to point a finger.

Understand that we each have responsibility over our own lives. Therefore, stop trying to spare the feelings of those who insist on sticking their nose where it doesn’t belong.

Tell these people to keep their snouts out of your business. Your life is yours to lead, no one else’s. So, stop worrying about what others think and say of you.

They may not like the way you live or think, but that’s their problem, not yours. Your life and the life-choices you make are no one’s business but yours.

So, tell them to kiss your ass and take your power back!

This post is all about why you should set your own standards instead of conforming to a bully’s so that you can take back your power and your life.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Bullying and Psychological Conditioning

2. How to Shut Down a Bully: 11 Comebacks that Stop Them Cold

3. How to Disarm a Bully: 13 Clever Comebacks that Work Wonders

hypocritical bullies at work

Hypocritical Bullies: Bullying and Hypocrisy Go Hand in Hand

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‘Want to know all about hypocritical bullies, what behaviors to look for and how to spot them? Here’s everything you need to know.

hypocritical bullies

Bullies really are hypocrites. They’re good at accusing you of the very bad deeds they do themselves. It’s funny, when you really think about it.

Therefore, in this post, you’ll learn all about hypocritical bullies and how to spot them so that you can point them out and avoid them to protect yourself from them.

Once you learn all about these red flags, you’ll know them just by watching them.

This post is all about hypocritical bullies so that you can spot them and beware of them.

Hypocritical bullies

Many Bullies Claim to be Christians

But are they really Christians? Are they, in fact, true Christians?

Sadly, many of your classmates or coworkers may have reputations as church-going people. They may go to church every Sunday. In fact, they may go every time the church doors open.

However, they may not act like Christians once they are away from the sanctuary. But, because of their reputations, they will get credibility they haven’t earned.

For example, at school, you may have group a girls who the teachers and principal dub as “the religious girls.” However, they’ll be just as nasty, if not worse, than the secular kids in the class.

This is not to say that all Christians are like this, because no, not all of them are. However, just as with any other religion, party, or group, there will always be wolves in sheep’s clothing among the flock.

Though over half of the people at work or school sit in a church pew on Sunday,  they’ll still bully you and a few others during the week. Moreover, if they aren’t necessarily bullies, they may join in with the bullies and mistreat you.

A few may not actively participate in the bullying but will stand back and watch the bullying. These people may either get entertainment from it, or pretend it isn’t happening. How Christian is that?

Just Because They Claim to be Christians Doesn’t Make it So.

These so-called Christian people may never bully you by cursing you out or beating you up. They’re too smart to make it that obvious.

However, they’ll sat back and snicker as they watch your bullies totally humiliate you. Also they’ll spiritually bully you.

For instance, they’ll tell you that you should, ”turn the other cheek.”  They’ll suggest that you submit to the bad treatment and if you don’t,  you’re going to hell.

Therefore, if this happens to you, ask them this. “What would you do if the shoe was on the other foot? Would you submit to it if it were happening to you?

Remember that the devil never comes in the form of a red man with horns and a pointy tail. He comes as an angel of light!

It’s bad enough when people who aren’t in the church target you for bullying. But when it’s those who claim to be Christians, it can be downright devastating.

Why? Because, just by virtue of being known as Christians, they will likely compel you to believe that you really are an evil person. Moreover, they’ll make you feel terrible about yourself.

Hypocritical bullies:

Judge Only by Actions, Not Affiliations.

If this ever happens to you, see them for who they really were- sanctimonious hypocrites.

Once you see your bullies exactly as they are, no amount of gaslighting will work on you. Any justification or rationalization of what they did will no longer have an effect on you.

Why? Because they’ll stand naked before you. And I thank the Lord for giving me this knowledge because it has given me so much confidence.

And confidence is freedom.

Again, none of us are perfect because we’re all human and humans sin every day. Christians are no exception to this. Moreover, I’ll be the first to admit that there were times and situations when I didn’t act very Christian.

I’m not afraid to own it. However, what I didn’t do was repeatedly use my faith as a weapon against someone who was already being horribly mistreated.

Anytime Christians use their faith to destroy another, they stoop to a special kind of evil and God will judge them the harshest.

I know for a fact that Jesus would have had my back. Also, He would have admonished them. And not only their persecution of a few others, but for their fake Christianity and sanctimony. Because true Christians will never use their faith and Christian platform to bully and destroy another human being.

Giving it a Name.

Therefore, if anyone claiming to be a person of God bullies you, they are not of God. There are names for people who use their faith to destroy your spirit. You can call them sanctimonious. Or you can look at them as hypocrites.

Knowing how to name these people is your power. It makes it so much easier for you to call it out. So, I urge you to see these people for who they are and name them accordingly.

They are not Christians. They’re only sanctimonious hypocrites.

Hypocritical Bullies:

Bullies Who Virtue Signal

Seasoned bullies are masters at virtue-signaling. In other words, they make themselves look like the angels they aren’t. Most bullies are expert virtue signalers.

 For example, I remember sitting in class, pregnant with my first child. I had also gotten married a few weeks before.

One of my bullies, we will call her Amy, told me I was still a sinner because I’d gotten pregnant before I had gotten married. Moreover, she made sure to blurt it out in front of everyone else.

However, what was funny was that she was one of those girls who slept around with every Tom, Dick, and Harry. Not that I ever judged her for it because what she did on the weekends was nobody’s business but hers.

However, I saw this for what it was. She was projecting. This is what saved my self-esteem.

Amy went on. She also told me that my child was a bastard and would be better off dead than to have me for a mother. The last thing she said was that I should never be allowed to get married nor have kids.

With that said, know this. Any time a bully publicly passes judgement on you, they only do it to feel like they’re better than you.

Moreover, they do it to fool themselves, you, and everyone else. They want everyone to think that they’re above you on the totem pole of morals and decency.

The reason Amy called out my “lack of virtue” was to try and prove to everyone else that she had it. However, although no one said a word, I think they all knew who she really was and what her attack was all about.

Sadly, we see the same from many people today.

Hypocritical Bullies:

If you know who you are, there’s no need to prove anything.

If you know yourself and you know that you aren’t the label of the day, be it a “whore”, a racist, a conspiracy theorist, or a nut job; there’s no need to prove it.

Moreover, you won’t feel you have to attack anyone else, pander, or virtue signal. There’s no need to prove something that’s already there.

When you truly know yourself, you won’t feel you have to prove anything to anyone. Trying to is too much work. It’s a waste of your time and energy. You do not have to show others you have something if it’s something you already have.

If you feel you must bend over backwards to prove something to the rest of the world, it’s a sign of insecurity or guilt.  Therefore, if your conscience is clear, don’t ever feel like you have anything to prove. You don’t.

There will be times when people accuse you of being the bully

Sadly, we now live in a culture of fruit-bats who are so quick to cry “bully” anytime you listen to your intuition.

This will happen especially if you don’t feel comfortable around a particular person. Understand that just because you prefer not to be around someone doesn’t necessarily make you a bully.

You may have legitimate and justifiable reasons for it. Let’s face it, we like who we like and we dislike who we dislike.

For instance, if the person creeps you out, it may be your gut warning you that the person is dangerous. And if you don’t feel safe around someone, it’s best to stay away from them.

Moreover, if the person is toxic and constantly dogs your mood, it’s natural to avoid this person. No sensible and healthy human being would want to be around such a person.

However, be prepared for a few clueless others to throw the label of “bully” in your face.

Know that, anytime you sense that something is “off” about a certain person, you have every right to ensure your own safety. You not only have a right, but an obligation to yourself to steer clear of them.

 You have a right to protect yourself from creeps, pedophiles, rapists, murderers, grifters, and other nefarious people.

Hypocritical Bullies:

Hypocrites send these unspoken messages:

  • “Safety and protection for us but not for you.”
  • “It’s bad when you do it but it’s okay when we do it!”

Therefore, don’t let these types of people confuse you. Realize that you don’t have to justify yourself to anyone! See this for what it is. You’re being held to a double standard.

You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone when you’re  trying to keep yourself safe. And if others unfairly criticize you for being uncomfortable around someone, then you should avoid them too.

Again, not wanting to be around someone isn’t bullying. You are not seeking to hurt them. You just want to keep yourself safe. It’s only bullying when you ignore someone for the sole purpose of harming them.

Parents Who Encourage Their Children to Bully Other People’s Children

Back in 2016, I saw a video, in which a young man was bullied by not only an adolescent girl but also her mother.

In the video, the young man is badly beaten by two, maybe three other boys, who were with the girl and her mother. They spotted the young man in a local park, stopped, and let the assailants out to attack him.

Also, by listening to the audio, I discovered that this mother was actually encouraging the bullies. She was cheering them on as they were viciously attacking him. Later, it was reported that the mother had been arrested.

Sadly, this was not the first video I’d seen of bullying involving a parent. I have watched many videos in the past twenty years…violent videos! Those in which the parent of the attacker actually egged on the altercation!

Hypocritical Bullies:

Adults who Bully Children

I have seen many news reports of parents arrested for attacking children on school buses, in city parks, and schoolyards for a perceived slight against their child.

Also, children and teens are also being cyber-bullied by not only their classroom bullies but the bullies’ parents as well. Just google the Megan Meier case and you will see how this precious child took her own life because she was being harassed online by not only her teenage bullies but by the mother of one of her bullies.

This type of behavior is horrible enough coming from young people but coming from parents, who should know better, it’s downright disgusting!

It amazes me how immature a good portion of today’s parents are. I have personally seen parents act as if they are still in high school. And it’s embarrassing, to say the least.

What embarrasses me the most is that the parents are of my generation!

These parents are no better than the bullies they are raising! They try to be their child’s BFF instead of being their parent. Most don’t teach good morals and values anymore. They don’t mind bullying other people’s children. However, they’re the first to holler when someone even ignores their little darling.

This is mostly the reason bullying is so prevalent today.

Why Some Parents Condone Bullying

Many parents encourage their child to bully other children because they have a deep-seated belief that being a bully is where it’s at. They think bullying is what it takes to move up the social hierarchy and be successful in life.

Also, they believe that keeping others down is key to being on top.

These parents believe that being popular and the toughest kid on the block is what life is all about. Also, I’ve seen parents who wanted to fight the bullied child’s parents because they spoke out.

Worse even, I’ve seen cases where the bully’s parents wanted to physically fight the young victim for daring to stand up to their bully child!

Again, the parents are mostly people in my age group and younger…thirties, forties, and fifties- old enough to have long ago known right from wrong!

Chance are that the parents were just as bad when they were in school. The bullying behaviors just passed from generation to generation.

Is it any wonder that bullying is so widespread?

One thing I cannot fathom is how an adult can insert themselves into kiddie confrontations. They bash the other child by calling them degrading names like they’re still in middle school. How do they resort to saw despicable acts and continue to keep a straight face?

How can people such as these bare to look in the mirror at themselves every day without turning ten shades of red? I just don’t get it. What is wrong with some of the parents of my generation?

Hypocritical Bullies:

Widespread bullying

Parents of this low caliber do not care about any other children than their own. They have no empathy whatsoever. In my opinion, people of this kind shouldn’t have children.

It’s sad that good, wholesome, strong parents are all but non-existent anymore. Those who actually love their child enough to call them out on bad behavior and enforce rules, are a dying breed.

Good parents are replaced by parents who encourage despicable behavior in their children. What will society and the world be like in another twenty years if we do not address this issue?

See these types of parents for who they are. They’re hypocritical bullies who don’t mind tormenting other people’s children. However, they’re the first to cry “bully” when others call their children out for bad behavior.

This post was all about hypocritical bullies, their behaviors, and how to spot them so that you can protect yourself from them.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Knowing Yourself: Why it’s the First Step in Building Confidence

2. Speaking Up About Bullying: Be Prepared for These 8 Responses

3. What Do Bullies Fear Most? 10 Things that Terrify Bullies

4. Why Bullying Goes Unpunished: 7 Reasons to Stand Up for Yourself

5. Effects of Bullying on the Victim: 13 Symptoms of Bullied People

incivility vs bullying at work

Incivility vs Bullying

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Incivility vs bullying. ‘Want to know the difference between the two? Here are the many ways they differ.

incivility vs bullyingMany people mistake incivility for bullying.

In the post, you will learn the difference of incivility vs bullying. Also, you’ll learn how to tell which is which.

Once you learn all this important information, you will be better able to see the difference when they happen. Moreover, you will know how to respond more appropriately.

This post is all about incivility vs bullying. Also, it teaches you the patterns and behaviors to look for in each so that you can more accurately call it out.

Incivility vs Bullying

In life, you’ll deal with difficult people. You will meet many jerks who act rude and obnoxious. However, just because a person is rude doesn’t mean they’re bullies.

Everyone deals with incivility but not everyone gets bullied.

Incivility is a part of life. Bullying, on the other hand, is sick and twisted. Although a jerk’s behavior is hurtful and negative, it doesn’t mean they’re bullying you.

Therefore, when is hurtful behavior classified as bullying? How do we tell the difference between bullying and incivility?  Also, what is the difference between a jerk and a bully?

Before we go any further, let’s define bullying.

The Definition of Bullying

Bullying – an ongoing and deliberate misuse of power in relationships through repeated verbal, physical, and/or social behavior that intends to cause physical, social, and/or psychological harm. It can involve an individual or a group misusing their power, or perceived power, over one or more persons who feel unable to stop it from happening

(https://www.ncab.org.au/bullying-advice/bullying-for-parents/definition-of-bullying/)

Incivility vs Bullying:

The Misuse of the term “Bullying”

In today’s climate, people use the word, “bullying” too loosely. Moreover, they use it to describe situations that don’t fit its use.

In fact, many stick the label to anyone who says anything they don’t agree with. They often confuse bullying with anything someone says that they don’t like.

Therefore, we have a duty to give the proper definition of bullying. Moreover, we must learn to differentiate bullying from other forms of conflict.

All too often, people confuse bullying with:

  • Disagreements and truthful debates
  • Misunderstandings
  • Stubbornness
  • Incivility and jerky behavior

Sadly, bullying has become a blanket term. People use it to describe anyone who says or does anything they don’t like.

Sure. There are those who are jerks. However, it doesn’t necessarily make them bullies.

Therefore, when society sticks this label where it doesn’t belong, it deprives people of the right to have their own opinions. This is wrong.

So, what are the differences of incivility vs bullying?

1. Bullying Requires a target Victim. Incivility Doesn’t.

Bullying requires a target! In other words, bullies single out one person to abuse.

Anyone, at any age, can fall victim to bullying. Also, there is evidence that suggests that child and teen targets are more likely to grow up to be bullied, adults. A few don’t, but most do.

Incivility, on the other hand, doesn’t need a target. The uncivil person just has a rotten attitude and the behavior is random. In other words, the person is just a jerk and their meanness is aimed at everyone.

All bullies, regardless of age, deep down at their core, are cowards! A jerk just doesn’t care. Period.

Again, bullying requires a target victim. Take the victim out of the equation and bullying ceases to exist. Incivility, on the other hand, has no particular target person. An uncivil person is mean to anyone.

In other words, bullies target you specifically. People who are uncivil treat everyone like dirt, not just you.

2. Incivility vs Bullying:

Bullying is a pattern. Incivility Isn’t.

As mentioned in the last section, bullying is a pattern. It repeats itself over and over. Incivility, on the other hand, is sporadic.

In other words, bullies repeat the behavior against you. There’s a reason why bullies repeat their behavior. It’s to tear down your confidence and make you doubt your worth.

The repeated attacks serve to brainwash you and convince you that you have no value. Think about it. Tyrannical governments also brainwash their target people with repeated attacks.

Therefore, there’s a reason for the repetition. Repeat a lie often enough and it becomes the truth. Repeat a behavior often enough and it becomes normalized. Bullying operates the same exact way.

On the other hand, Incivility isn’t repeated, especially against the same person. Again, jerks  direct their vicious attitudes toward all kinds of people.

3. Bullying Lasts a Long Period of Time.

  Not only do bullies repeat their attacks against the same individual or group. They also do it over a long period of time (usually from 3 weeks to several years). Therefore, it is relentless.

Bullying is long-term because it takes time to take the desired effect on the victim. In other words, targets of bullying don’t break down overnight. The breakdown is almost always a cumulative result of bullying.

Incivility, on the other hand, doesn’t last long at all. In fact, it only requires a one-time occurrence.

For example, you’re driving and you accidentally pull in front of someone.

They lay on the horn and scream, “Watch where the hell you’re going you moron!” That’s not bullying. It’s incivility.

4. Incivility vs Bullying:

Bullying is a Campaign with a goal. Incivility Has No Particular Goal.

Bullies often persuade others, even total strangers, to join in on tormenting you. They go around defaming you to anyone who’ll listen.

They do this to isolate you by lessening your chances of making new friends and destroying your existing relationships.

The goal of bullying is to isolate, demoralize, and destroy the target victim. Therefore, bullies start by employing smears to destroy the target’s good name and standing in a community.

Moreover, it can tear down their relationships, family, career, finances and businesses. Consequently, the cumulative result is that bullying ruins the target’s self-esteem and their life.

5. Bullying is personal.

As mentioned earlier, bullies require a target. Also, bullying requires an agenda and vendetta. Bullies will actively pursue you and make it their mission in life to destroy you.

Uncivil people, on the other hand, have no agenda nor vendetta. Therefore, they don’t care who you are or where you come from. They just have personalities that suck. These people are just jerks.

Jerks treat everyone in general, like dirt. Moreover, they only insult you because they don’t want you to bother them with anything.  They’ll never put in the time or effort to pursue anyone.

Jerks are equal opportunity dirt bags.

A jerk just doesn’t care about anyone. Period. This kind of person is just afraid you might want something from him. On the other hand, a bully wants something from YOU.

Examples of Incivility vs Bullying:

Jerky Behavior.

If a 6’5” tall and muscular knucklehead on the street bumps into you and says, “Hey, idiot! Watch where the hell you’re going!”, then keeps walking. That’s not bullying.

Is the person a total jackass? Absolutely. However, he isn’t necessarily a bully.

Bullying would be if he deliberately ran into you and shot his mouth off to you every day, every time he saw you on the street. In other words, he’d have to repeat the behavior and continue to harass you.

Only then would this be a case of bullying. Why? Because the knucklehead would be using his size and height to intimidate you. Also, he’d be repeating the behavior every day.

Voicing an Opinion.

Kathy and Kelly live across the street from each other. Kelly asks Kathy what she thinks of her new next-door neighbor. Kathy answers, saying, “I think he is an arrogant, egotistical jackass.”

Kathy is not a bully. Is she highly opinionated? Yes. Is she an asshole? Probably. But she’s not necessarily a bully.

However, if Kathy continues this behavior for a length of time, then yes. She would be a bully. If she smears the new neighbor to everyone in the neighborhood to turn everyone against them, then you could call it bullying.

Incivility vs Bullying:

Arguments and debates.

If two people are arguing over different beliefs, it’s not bullying. This goes even if the argument is heated.

However, incivility becomes bullying when one of the arguers begins repeatedly calling the other names and shaming them because they don’t share their beliefs. Moreover, if the person continues to harass the other long after the debate is finished, then, yes, it’s bullying.

To protect yourself from being falsely labeled a bully, you must know what constitutes bullying and what doesn’t. Only then will you be able to distinguish between each and correct anyone who tries to stick you with that label.

And you will do it confidently.

THis post is all about the differences of incivility vs bullying so that you can better recognize the differences between the two and call out bullying when you see it.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. What Constitutes Bullying and What Doesn’t

2. Speaking Out Against Bullying: 5 Ways Bullies React When You Speak Up

3. How to Spot a Bully: 13 Must-Know Body-Language Examples