Following the crowd and conforming too tightly to what everyone else thinks and does is so unhealthy! When the desire to fit in takes up so much of your time and energy, it leaves you feeling exhausted.
Understand that to follow the crowd requires that you neglect your own wants and needs to appease and please others. After so long, you will build up resentment and the funny thing is that you won’t know why you feel so resentful.
But I can tell you why. It’s because you neglected and denied your own needs to satisfy other people. You didn’t practice self-care because you were so afraid of pissing someone off.
Being a crowd-follower leaves one feeling controlled and manipulated. It’s also tiring because it requires so much work and effort.
Can you imagine having to shift-shape yourself constantly, forever having to change and adjust yourself to the new and keep up with the Jones’s? I can, because I did that for a long time and don’t want to ever do it again. It was exhausting and frustrating!
Understand that you’re not a ball of play-doh and no one can mold you into what they want you to be unless you allow them to. When you break your back to follow the crowd, you become a stranger to yourself. You will no longer recognize yourself because you’ve lost any sense of who you are.
When you don’t know yourself anymore, you lose sight of your goals, dreams, and aspirations. In short, you forget all about what you want out of life. Even worse, you’re more likely to take abuse from others and do things you don’t want to do- just to fit in and be liked.
You constantly worry and fret about what others think of you and say about you.
Screw that noise!
That’s no way to live and life’s too short for it!
Once you’re lost yourself, getting reacquainted with yourself is a slow process and can be downright uncomfortable. But it’s a necessity if you ever want to get your life back and be happy and at peace.
With knowledge comes empowerment!
Rightly said.. once u lost yourself it’s a difficult process to regaining that trust and confidence back.. very relatable
Thank you, Vartika. I think most of us have been there and coming back from it is a long process. 💖
True ❤️
Great advice, but it often times takes greater courage to go it alone. The crowd followers will campaign against you for not going along with them.
You got that right, Michael! You said it perfectly! 👏
I think the problem stems from people being afraid to show individuality. So many of us growing up were basically Clones. Now that I reflect, how many of us listened to the same bands are friends were listening to not basically we necessarily liked them but because we didn’t want to be different. We liked the same guys or girls, wore the same clothes, same hair styles, etc, rooted for the same teams. And the kids that were into different things we often mocked. I can remember for example there was a group of kids instead of going out to recess with sit in a classroom and play role playing games. We thought of it as them being the book worms, kind of nerdy, while I always noticed how close they were to one another as friends, and how much fun they seemed like they were having. I kind of wanted to play too but was afraid to admit it.
I completely agree! And you have to admire the nerdy kids because they weren’t afraid to be different. As for me, when I was in school, I listened to a lot of heavy metal but it was because I loved it, and it so happened that everyone else was listening to it too. However, I liked to write stories and sing music. I wasn’t into a lot of sports (only volleyball and kickball) That was frowned upon.
I agree with 80smetalman, it takes greater courage to go it alone. Some folks just want to be a part of something whether it’s good for them or not (much of the time it isn’t) just because it may be popular. I think we see more adults following the corrupt leaders than many of the kids nowadays. Yet, sooner or later people will find out just how toxic and chaotic losing yourself in the crowd can be! 😟 😲 😱 Sad!
I totally agree with this, Kym! In today’s climate, many adults are worse than the kids when it comes to being followers- or sheep, the name I love to give them! They don’t realize that they’re being led to a slaughter! And by the time they get there, it’ll be too late to turn back. I love your comment because you’re so spot on! You can’t get any more spot on than you are now, girl! <3 :D
I love it Cherie! Great minds think alike! Next stop 🛑 …the Slaughterhouse! 😱 SMH
You better believe it’s the slaughterhouse, girl! 😮