Leaving Town to Escape Bullying: 7 Reasons it’s a Good Idea

December 5, 2025December 5, 2025Leave a comment

‘Want to know why leaving town to escape bullying is sometimes the best idea? Here, you’ll find out the exact reasons, in detail, why moving to a new area could be the best decision you’ll ever make.

“A prophet is honored everywhere except in his own hometown and among his relatives and his own family.” – Mark 6:4

Therefore, in this post, you will learn why you may need to consider leaving town to escape bullying.

Once you learn all about this vital information, you will be compelled to make the changes you need to have a better life.

This post is all about leaving town to escape bullying and why it could be the best thing you can ever do for yourself.

Leaving Town to Escape Bullying

You want to live bully-free. You long for others to give you space and the chance to relax, be yourself, and live a rewarding and meaningful life.

Moreover, you want opportunities to flow into your life and to live by your own standards. If people bully you, you probably desire to reinvent yourself and attract love and respect.

Unfortunately, to do this, you will have to leave the area if everyone bullies you. Here’s why this is a good idea.

1. People will always know you as the label they stuck you with.

If you don’t move, everyone will never forget you as that “loser,” or that “whore.” They will only remember you as that “lowlife,” that “nut-ball,” or whatever label they stuck you with. Therefore, no one will give you a chance, no matter what you do.

Moreover, Everyone will know you as the kid whom everyone bullied and got away with it. They’ll always have you in their mind as “Everybody’s bitch.”

As a result, they will treat you as such. And they will do it long after graduation, especially if you live in a small town or rural area.

So, why not consider leaving if you can afford it?

2. Leaving Town to Escape Bullying:

In a New Town, People Will Likely Welcome You.

In a new geological area, you will be the new kid in town. You will be that new kid who is mysterious, intriguing, and beguiling!

You will be the person everyone is anxious to meet because they feel that you’re full of hope and promise. When you leave for a new area, you can reinvent and redefine yourself.

You can rewrite your own story and give a stellar first impression, then let it speak for itself. As a result, you can be successful at anything. And you can attract endless opportunities for love, friendship, and advancement.

3. If you stay, no one will give you a chance to rise above.

But back in the old town, you’re the kid who was desperate for attention. In other words, others will view every success you enjoy as another ploy to show off and impress others.

Also, there’s a high likelihood that you will provoke their jealousy. And they will treat you even worse as an adult.

In contrast, any failure will be seen by others as an “I told you so” moment. It will confirm to them that you really are a loser.

However, in a new area, your value comes from what you put out. You are judged by the fruit you bear, not who you are.

Whereas, in the old town, you are judged by your reputation, which was ruined in school. Just because of who they think you are, they will adjust their attitudes to reflect hostility.

Therefore, leaving town saves you from all of that.

4. Leaving town to Escape Bullying:

In the old town, people will have already made up their minds.

In a locale where you were bullied, nobody will be interested in how much you’ve grown as a person. They won’t want to hear about any successes you’ve enjoyed or accomplishments you’ve made. Why?

Because it would only force them to consider that maybe you’re not such a bad person after all. As a result, it might quiet their own judgment of you.

Think about it. No one wants to be wrong about anything. Therefore, they’ll only dig their heels in and double down on their judgments and attitudes.

Again, leaving town and going where no one knows you gives you a chance to re-establish yourself.

5. Without leaving town, you’ll Never Discover Your True Potential.

It’s next to impossible to discover your true potential when others define you by who they think you are. Their perceptions of you will always be negative, so they will do everything they can to keep you in your place.

It’s a box you will never be able to get out of, no matter what. However, when you leave and move to a new environment, you will more likely advance. You’re likely to get the breakthrough you’ve waited for so long.

6. Leaving town to Escape Bullying:

Opportunities will open up for you.

You could become an expert at something later in life. And others would respect you for it anywhere else. However, if you took that expertise to the old town, only a scant few would acknowledge it.

But if you leave and move to a new locale and show what you know, then you’ll likely have notoriety.

But more importantly, you should consider leaving so you can finally have peace. Do it because your happiness and your sanity depend on it.

Why would you stay in a place where people constantly watch you every move? Moreover, why would you stay where people unfairly judge and mistreat you?

Why stay where you’ll only suffer more bullying in the future? Also, why live where people will more than likely bully you out of every job you find?

Moreover, why risk bullies harassing you at the supermarket? Why continue to live under the threat of hoodlums jumping you in the parking lot outside the local Dairy Queen?

7. You can always return for a visit if you have family in the old town, but you don’t have to live there.

You can always return a few years later after you’ve built your confidence and social and creative portfolios. However, don’t be surprised if you notice all the things that suck about the old town.

And, one of the things that will suck the most is the reception you get from the people there. Therefore, if you have family there, stop in for a visit. However, do it on a low key.

Another thing that will most likely disappoint you is that you will have experienced more life changes than anyone who stayed. Therefore, they would only bore the crap out of you.

Leaving Town to Escape Bullying:

It’s best to get out of Dodge

Leaving town isn’t running, and it isn’t being chicken. It’s finding a place where you can flourish and have a better life. There’s nothing wrong with that. And there’s no shame or blame in that.

Go to a brand-new place and rediscover yourself. You want to get beyond the confines of your reputation, and the only way to do that is to pack your bags and leave.

When you escape bullying, you escape everything that comes with it. You escape mental and physical abuse, and you also escape unfair judgment. And the best part is that you escape stagnation.

Leaving town is the only way you’ll become what you want to be and move up in the world! Once you move to a new area and get re-established, you’ll have a level of respect, influence, safety, and best of all, freedom that you never would’ve achieved had you stayed in your home area!

You either leave or stay and embrace the Suck.

I realize that some cannot leave, especially children or adults who can’t afford it. Life circumstances can sometimes trap victims of bullying in a school or town that hates them.

It’s easier to get out of a toxic environment when you’re an adult who others bully at work. You can transfer, and if you can’t transfer, you can always quit.

However, when you’re a minor, it’s almost impossible. What if your family cannot afford to move to a new school district? Also, what if your parents refuse to move or to transfer you? What if your parents can’t afford to homeschool you?

There’s nothing worse than being stuck in a toxic environment and in a horrible situation. When everyone in the school or area is bullying you and there’s no way of escaping it, it’s the feeling of entrapment!

Just imagine finding yourself in this situation, and there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it! You can’t get away from it! You’re just stuck there!

So, what do you do? You embrace the suck.

Embracing the suck means that you grin and bear it. You accept the god-awful, crappy mess that plagues your life because there’s no other choice.

Leaving town to Escape Bullying:

Sadly, some people have no choice but to stay.

In other words, you’re just plain screwed, and there’s no way out of it. You decide to live with it and make peace with the possibility that things may not get any better. And yes, it sucks!

Sadly, uncontrollable circumstances keep targeted kids in schools with a toxic culture of bullying. Finances keep adults stuck in neighborhoods full of people who hate them.

When a child is stuck in a school where bullying is rife, their classmates attack them daily. They attack them psychologically and physically.

Teachers and principals view these children unfavorably because bullies have convinced them that they are the instigators. Therefore, school staff are constantly watching them, waiting for any reason to drag them into the principal’s office.

These kids suffer from plummeting grades and poor school performance. Why? Because circumstances force them to stay in a toxic school.

As a result, they live in survival mode. And, unfortunately, preparing for a hostile learning environment takes priority over studying and learning.

Therefore, school staff see them as lazy and hopeless. And they refuse to give them the extra help they need.

Gee! That’s an awful lot of suck!

And how much suck can one child deal with?

Understand that if you’re a child dealing with these types of circumstances, you don’t have to “embrace the suck.” There’s always School Choice.

Nowadays, families can apply for vouchers to transfer their child to a new school. These vouchers have saved countless targets from years of bullying.

Also, there are other things you can do if, by chance, School Choice isn’t an option where you live:

document the bullying and have your parent or legal guardian help you with your documentation.
Also, depending on the jurisdiction you live in, hide a body cam or digital device somewhere on your person.
Thirdly, practice self-care.

And keep the faith. School Choice may not be available in your area now, but it doesn’t mean it won’t be later. You are not entirely powerless. Do the above three things because they are within your control.

When you document and record the bullying and practice self-care, you’ll not only change the dynamic. You’ll also feel so much better about yourself because you will have at least some control.

Leaving Town to Escape Bullying:

In conclusion

If you can’t leave, my heart goes out to you. However, if you can, you must consider doing so because leaving for greener pastures can change your life. Leaving town to escape bullying usually works out for the best. It gives you new hope.

It allows you to get re-established and start your life anew. You will meet new people who will welcome you because you’ll have no history with them.

Leaving town gives you a fresh start with a clean slate. And you won’t regret it. I promise you!

This post was all about leaving town to escape bullying to let you know that there is always something you can do to better your life and get away from bullying.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. School Choice: Why it’s a Godsend for Bullied Kids!

2. It Only Gets Better: There is Life After Bullying

3. There’s Always Hope: 11 Things to Remember When People Bully You

Low Self-Esteem Causes: 3 Things that Crush Your Confidence

October 28, 2025October 12, 20256 Comments

‘Want to know all the low self-esteem causes? Here are seven things that trigger low self-esteem, along with actions you can take to reverse them.

Low self-esteem doesn’t just happen. It is caused. Therefore, in this post, you will learn all the low self-esteem causes so that you can heal yourself.

Once you learn all about these essential facts, you will be able to recognize the early warning signs and take steps to repair things early.

This post is all about low self-esteem causes so that you can take steps to save it when someone tries to put a dent in it.

Low self-Esteem CAuses

Insecurity and a lack of confidence are not characteristics that we’re born with. They are taught!

People begin chipping away at your self-esteem when you are a small child. Bullies and abusive family members can program it into you. This is no secret.

However, well-meaning family members can also give it to you. And they do it, thinking that they are teaching you humbleness and humility. Granted, these characteristics are both good virtues to have, but only in moderation.

Too much of it can cause you to suppress a little too much of yourself. When you’re too humble, you hide your own extraordinary personalities, talents, and gifts.

It can grow into insecurity and, in worst cases, self-loathing.

Low Self-Esteem is taught

Each one of us is born with confidence and a heart of gold. However, over time, your environment, circumstances, and sadly, the people in your life can slowly erode the natural confidence and goodness you were born with.

Once someone has hurt you so many times, you withdraw from others. You put up a barrier to protect yourself. And you turn cold and harden yourself to numb the feelings of rejection and pain.

Low Self-Esteem Causes:

The Slow Erosion of Self-Esteem

Before long, you regard others’ feelings and suffering with indifference. In other words, you don’t give a crap about anyone. You don’t care how they feel or what they think.

Sometimes, you even grow cold toward the people who love you because you lose the ability to trust them. You no longer have any respect for others, much less yourself.

Lastly, you arrive at that dark place where schadenfreude takes hold of your personality. And you secretly or openly take pleasure in seeing others, especially those you hate, suffer.

Low Self-Esteem Comes From Not Knowing Who You Are

Abusive family members and bullies aren’t the only ones who can squash your self-esteem. Media, movies, music, and politicians can also cause you to feel bad about yourself.

You see those with victim mentality, those running around in fear, and those who carry unnecessary guilt.

1. Fear.

Many politicians and news personalities try to cause fear in the masses. Bullies do the same. They instill fear in you by threatening physical harm or smear campaigns. All of them do it to keep you under their power.

Love Self-Esteem Causes:

2. Victimhood.

Media, politicians, and bullies also use the victim card to keep you down. Bullies also tell you that you can’t do anything to better your situation.

They try to convince you that you’re stuck with no way out. They also try to convince you that you’re their victim and always will be.

Politicians and media also try to convince certain ones that they’re victims and can’t rise above it. They also make them believe that others hate them and are blocking them from success.

If someone can convince you that you’re a victim and that there’s nothing you can do to change it, then you’re least likely even to want to try at anything. Right?

Again, they all do this to maintain power over them.

3. Guilt.

Media and politicians use guilt and gaslighting to control particular groups of people. Bullies also use guilt to control you.

Why? Because they all know that someone who feels guilty of something will do desperate things to prove that they’re not guilty. A guilt-stricken person will bend over backwards to make up for their (perceived) transgressions.

For example, several year ago, we saw people kneeling before certain groups to virtue signal and prove they weren’t evil. And while these people were kneeling, those they were kneeling before only laughed. It was quite pathetic.

Bullies, media, and politicians will convince their targets that they’re inherently evil. They’ll send the message that somehow, the targets are responsible for the evil in the world.

Low Self-Esteem Causes:

When you know who you are, you don’t need to prove it.

I want you to understand that you are not responsible for someone else’s unspeakable actions. ‘You see? Here’s the thing. If you know that you aren’t any of the things they call you, you don’t have to prove it.

You’ll refuse to demean yourself by bending over backwards and jumping through hoops to convince these idiots that you are not what they call you. Why? Because you know you don’t have to.

If you know who you are, what you stand for, and that you haven’t done anything wrong, you know. Your virtues are there whether others see them or not.

You’ll let your goodness and humanity speak for themselves. Let your truth do the talking for you. Stop being afraid of being labeled.

Stop being a victim.

If you think you’re a victim, stop this thinking. Realize that you have more power than you know. And if you want to change your life for the better, no one can stop you unless you let them.

If you’re carrying guilt that isn’t your burden to carry, stop it right now. Know that a fearful person who feels guilty is controllable. Don’t be that person!

Instead, be the person whose positivity, love, and good deeds speak for themselves. Remember that we’re all human beings deserving of dignity and love.

Remember, it all starts when we are children. Therefore, parents, here are ways to build your children’s self-esteem.

Low Self-Esteem CAuses:

Ways to Build Your Child’s Self-Esteem

Bullying can be devastating to a child’s self-esteem. And the damage can last a lifetime. It can harm their progress even into adulthood.

But understand that, if you aren’t abusive, you didn’t cause your child’s low self-esteem. It isn’t your fault. You and your child are innocent in this. However, you still must do some damage control.

Teach them kindness and empathy, yes. However, you also have work to do. You must teach the children confidence. Neither of you gets out of this without some degree of responsibility.

I realize that it isn’t fair that most of the confidence-building work must be done on the victim’s end. However, nothing in life is fair, and we can’t change that reality.

If your child is bullied, you still need to take action. You must do your part to ensure that the children’s confidence stays intact. Why? So that they can flourish.

Therefore, it’s up to parents to tip the confidence balance more in the kids’ favor.

Teaching children confidence means teaching them never to look to bullies for validity. Most of all, it means creating experiences for them that naturally balance out all the negative experiences they face at school.

To neglect this work would be devastating for our children! How do you build a child’s self-esteem?

1. Low Self-Esteem Causes:

Teach them never to seek validation from anyone who mistreats them.

Many victims mistakenly seek validation from the very people who crush it. This is a losing battle. Why? Because when you seek approval from bullies and their followers, they will let you down every time.

And it will only reinforce the low self-esteem they already have. Teach the kids to seek approval from the right people—those who love and care for them. Those people will affirm their validation, and their self-esteem will skyrocket.

2. Give them opportunities to make friends outside their toxic school environment.

For instance, your kid can join a martial arts class or a scout troop. Also, you can send them to summer camp. Maybe you can get them involved in a church group.

There are so many options available for victims of bullying to forge lasting friendships. And you will be amazed at just how it will help build their confidence and self-esteem.

Yes, kind words, encouragement, and verbal reinforcement of positivity are essential. However, giving kids the positive experiences that back up your well-meaning words will work doubly well.

Why? Because it will serve as confirmation that they really are good kids and give their self-esteem that extra boost.

So, give your little guy or little girl fun, exciting, and positive experiences that they can remember fondly! They will thank you for it later! I guarantee it!

3. Low Self-Esteem Causes:

When they tell you they’re being bullied, believe them.

One of the biggest causes of low self-esteem is when a child tells their parents they’re being bullied, and they don’t believe it. Or, they ask them to ignore it.

As a parent, you must be your child’s primary source of support. Moreover, you must teach them assertive and confident ways to respond to bullying attacks.

Ignoring them will not make bullies go away. However, a confident response will. And you’ll be surprised at how it boosts self-esteem.

This post was all about low self-esteem causes so that you will recognize them and take steps to guard your confidence.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Signs of Low Self-Esteem and How to Correct It

2. Guilt by Association Fallacy: How It Brings About Bullying

3. Causes of Bullying: 9 Proven Factors That Trigger Bullying

4. Bullying by Teachers: 15 Proven Signs a Teacher is Bullying You

5. Confident Person Example: Who Are the Most Confident People?

That Bullied Vibe: How Not to Attract More Bullies

August 19, 2025August 15, 202512 Comments

Have you ever heard of that bullied vibe that victims of bullying give off that attracts more bullies and other human predators? Here’s everything that you need to know about it.

After bullies have targeted them for so long, some victims will give off certain micro-expressions of victimhood. And they will attract new bullies once the old ones leave their lives.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn about that bullied vibe, what it is, and how you can avoid giving it off.

Once you learn all about these crucial details, you will be better able to exude confidence instead of low self-esteem once you leave a bullying environment. Moreover, you won’t have any trouble with bullies.

This post is all about that bullied vibe, so that you know what it is and how to keep history from repeating itself.

That Bullied Vibe

What is it? It’s low energy that comes from low self-esteem, lack of confidence, and lack of self-belief. For instance, a person who gives off these kinds of vibes may exhibit specific non-verbal cues that scream, “Weak! Submissive! Vulnerable!”.

These cues include lack of eye contact, slouching, looking down, and appearing nervous. They can also include people-pleasing, neediness, approval-seeking, and desperation for friends or dating partners.

For instance, your bullies have bullied you for years. Moreover, they’ve managed to turn everyone against you, and your friends only side with your bullies.

Losing friends has become the norm for you. And because you suffer deprivation of human friendships, you’ve lost your sense of belonging.

Because the bullying has crushed your self-esteem, you begin slouching when you stand and avoid eye contact with people. You also feel nervous in social situations, and it shows!

After you’ve suffered this deprivation for so long, you become desperate for even the tiniest crumb of connection. So, you become needy. You begin exhibiting approval-seeking behaviors to try to win friends. Only the outcome is the opposite. You only attract more bullying.

In doing all this, you signal to everyone around you that you are a victim. In other words, you give off that bullied vibe.

That Bullied Vibe:

Neediness always invites abuse.

Understand that when bullies target you, they beat you down. They leave you sad, lonely, and worst of all, desperate!

Realize that evil always attaches itself to the weak and most vulnerable. People smell desperation from a mile away.

Therefore, if you give off even the tiniest scent of weakness, you will repel those who are emotionally healthy. In contrast, you will attract only the lowlifes who mean to use and abuse you.

Predators love to catch you when you’re most vulnerable. When bullies make you powerless, you will attract fake friends.

And they’ll only use you until they get all they can out of you. Many will pretend to be friends so that they can get close enough to you to hurt you.

They may use you for money or material things. Or they may use you for social benefits. Also, they may feign friendship to dominate you.

Whatever it is, know that they aren’t here for your benefit; they’re here for theirs.

Bullies have a refined ability to sense weakness.

In fact, they have an internal radar for it. They can see vulnerability as plain as day. In other words, they can tell if you’re confident in your ability to defend yourself. And they know whether they can wield power over someone.

People who have been abused often have learned helplessness. Bullies instantly pick up on this. Why? Because they are always on the hunt for easy prey. And a person who has the power to make their lives unpleasant is not easy prey.

It’s why they only target certain people and not others. Bullies are less likely to target a confident person than they are to select someone who isn’t confident.

That Bullied Vibe:

How and When does it start?

Sometimes, it starts somewhere during early childhood. Maybe your initial self-value and self-love were compromised by abuse. Perhaps you had parents who were overly aggressive with discipline.

It could be that you had older siblings who terrorized you. Maybe they made you believe that your feelings didn’t count.

Or you were born different. Maybe you have autism, and people have treated you like a disease.

Whatever the case may be, it broke your spirit. They conditioned you, and subconsciously, you started believing that you were defective – that you were inferior to others.

However, if nothing else, understand this. All false beliefs are created through traumatic experiences. They also stem from societal conditioning.

And, as time passes, those beliefs fester until they begin attracting experiences of bullying. This is why you must learn to recognize the connection between bullying and the unconscious beliefs you adopted earlier in your life.

The longer you don’t, the more bullying experiences you will have, and the more they will reinforce those false beliefs that you aren’t good enough. Moreover, the more victimized you will feel.

As a result, you will become more reclusive, more avoidant, and more unsure of yourself and others.

Never let them break your spirit!

Your spirit breaks the moment you accept other people’s definition of you. When you take your bullies’ judgements as truth, they win.

I know this is always easy to do. When you’re a small child, you can’t see the hidden motives of abusers. Therefore, when your frustrated mother lashes out at you, or your drug-addicted father abuses you, or an insecure older sibling teases you, their words penetrate your spirit.

As a result, they become a part of your inner dialogue. Why? Because the people who force-feed you this garbage are supposed to love you. Right?

“They’re probably saying these things for my own good. They know what’s best for me. So, I must have screwed up somewhere. I must have done something to cause these people so much frustration.”

That Bullied Vibe:

Toxic Beliefs don’t just HAPPEN. Others plant them in your mind.

And there you have it. That’s what your bullies sense. They sense your belief that you are defective and that you are not good enough.

And the sad thing is that these beliefs are subconscious. Therefore, they’re more difficult to tackle. If you’re a victim, oftentimes, you become frustrated because you don’t understand why history keeps repeating itself.

You’re at a loss as to why the same shit has happened to you over and over again throughout your entire life.

But here’s what is happening here.

You have very low self-esteem. And, because of this, you wear an invisible “kick-me sign”. Others may not see it, but they can sense it.

They can tell when you have a deeply buried fear of rejection. Also, you may be co-dependent. You likely don’t have any opinions, ideas, or principles of your own. Therefore, you constantly look to others for advice.

And this probably gets on people’s nerves, so you drive good people away. Others may lash out at you.

However, you must realize that these are only self-fulfilling prophesies.

How to Get Rid of That bullied Vibe and avoid attracting more bullies.

The trick is to dig deep down inside of yourself. Recall the memories of judgment that people instilled in you early in life. Also, remember that they conditioned you to think the thoughts that bring bullying about.

Then, re-frame those judgements as wrong. Moreover, start replacing your self-judgements with compassion and love for yourself. Do this with the love you would feel for a wounded child.

And most importantly, be patient because the change won’t happen overnight. Life will do everything it can to reinforce the negatives each day. So, you will need to do a lot of work to go against it.

When self-diminishing thoughts try to creep in, you must catch them and reverse them. You must replace them with thoughts of self-love.

You will need patience.

Again, it will be a slow process. However, if you remain focused and continue the work, you will eventually repair the damage your abusers did to your spirit. And the curse will finally be broken.

And here’s another solution. If your bullies are still in your life, cut them out of it. Also, find your purpose. Set goals and achieve them. Create your own power.

Your bullies may still try to bully you. But they will back down quicker if you defend yourself and carry yourself with confidence. You don’t have to be tall, muscular, or good-looking. Just use what you have.

What are your talents and gifts? What are your superpowers? And what are your goals and dreams? We all have them, and they come in many forms. Get to know yourself. Accept yourself, love yourself, and be proud of who you are.

This post was all about that bullied vibe so that you can take steps to change your mindset and undo any self-defeating beliefs that took root from past bullying and abuse.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Defending Yourself from Bullies: 11 Best Defenses

2. Conditioning: 5 Signs You’re Being Conditioned

3. Bullying and Psychological Conditioning

4. Loving Yourself First: 7 Amazing Benefits of Treating Yourself Well

Bullies are Cowards: Why Targets are the Brave Ones

August 1, 2025July 28, 20257 Comments

‘Want to know why bullies are cowards and how victims are the brave ones? Here is everything you need to know.

In a world where appearances prevail, it would seem that bullies are the brave ones and targets are the cowards. But things aren’t always what they seem. Now, are they?

In this post, you will learn why bullies are cowards and victims are the brave ones.

Once you learn all about these essential truths, you will feel better knowing that you are better off than your bullies will ever be.

This post is all about why bullies are often cowards, so that you can see your bullies for who they truly are and begin standing up to them.

Bullies are Cowards

Have you noticed that bullies love to talk smack? They trumpet to the world about how tough they are. Moreover, they believe that everyone else should bow down and tremble before them.

Bullies work hard at beating their chests and bluffing. However, it only goes to prove that they’re the least confident and most insecure schmucks on the face of the earth.

Why? Because anyone who must announce that they’re tough can’t be. When something is there, you don’t have to try and show it.

Those who are tough are usually the quiet ones. They don’t have to talk about it. How many times have you heard stories about the quiet kid beating the crap out of the loudmouth bully who pushed him too far?

The ones who are truly tough never talk. You don’t see these people running around, spouting off about how tough they are because they don’t have to.

They don’t need to tell you about it because they already know they’re tough and there’s no need to prove it to anyone. They’ve already proven it to themselves, and that’s enough.

Bluffs, Blowhards, and Windbags

Therefore, if any bully messes with them, they will get hurt.

I’ve dealt with droves of bullies, and one thing I noticed a long time ago is that they’re loudmouth losers. They puff out their chests and flap their lips. They talk about how they’re going to kick this person’s butt, whip that person’s butt- they never stop.

Additionally, many bullies may employ passive-aggressive tactics. Because they’re too scared to be direct, they like to hurl subtle zingers your way, hoping you won’t notice.

With these chumps, it’s one pissing contest after another.

Bullies are Cowards:

They Quickly Grow Boring.

As a result, having to listen to their gas constantly gets boring fast. Why? Because, again, that’s all you hear out of them.

Anyone who must spit such rubbish isn’t only trying to convince the rest of the world. They’re also trying to convince themselves.

These are characteristics of every single chump who has ever bullied me in my lifetime. It’s not only pathetic, but laughable that they must go through life this way.

Furthermore, these people are so incredibly insecure that you can trigger them just by challenging them in any way. Their egos are that fragile.

These bullies may even approach you and get in your face if they have their entourage of lackeys behind them. Therefore, if you’re a target of bullying, know this.

Your bullies are total fakes. They’re phonies. Cowards. Chumps!

All You Can Do is Pity Them.

When you stop and think about it, it’s hard to hate anyone who is this pathetic. The only thing you can do is feel sorry for such pitiful souls.

Again, remember that those who are genuinely tough don’t have to talk about it. It’s just there.

Always remember this the next time a bully gets in your face or shoots their mouth off. Feel confident in knowing that you’re not like this person and you don’t have to resort to such buffoonery. This alone should be a real self-esteem booster.

Have you noticed that many little people can be the biggest bullies?

Bullies are Cowards:

Bullies with Napoleon Complexes

Many bullies in school were insecure because they were short, skinny, or both. So, they would compensate for that by bullying others.

They would intimidate others by walking around with a scowl on their faces. Or they’d scream, yell, and talk real tough. It’s hilarious when I look back now.

Many of these little squirts do this, and there’s a name for it. It’s called either the “Napoleon Complex” or “little man syndrome.”

Think “Maddy Webber” on the new MacGyver reboot.

Understand that their bark is worse than their bite, and they bully as a defense mechanism. Maybe the little ankle-biters at my school gave me a hard time because bigger kids were bullying them.

But they would never admit it. So, they took the coward’s way out and searched for someone they thought was weaker.

They’d come at you with their spitfire tempers and want to try to fight you. Then they’d wonder why they got a good whack in the nose. Next, they’d either run, crying to a teacher, or they’d go bark up someone else’s tree.

I was small myself, weighing about 120 pounds and standing at only 5’3″ -5’4″. However, some of these kids were even smaller than I was. Such kids are in every school, and you even have tiny adults who behave the same way at work.

We even had a few short and skinny teachers. And they’d scream and yell at the students when they’d get too noisy.

I knew of one male English teacher who’d go wild. He would slam his fists down on his desk or shake his fists in the air. He would even throw erasers at students and scream like a banshee.

We just knew this little guy was a future resident at the state mental hospital.

Bullies are Cowards:

Real Life Experiences with Tiny Bullies

Even as an adult, I’ve seen different people (especially men) at work who were short and lanky. Yet, they would bark loudly, and I couldn’t help but think that they were compensating somehow for their stature.

Their screaming, cursing, posturing, and jockeying seemed to give them some sense of power. I’m not posting this to make fun of little people. Not all of them are like this. As I mentioned earlier, I’m only 5’4″.

We all come in different sizes and varieties, and we should celebrate those differences. But when you feel you have to bully others to make up for a weakness, you only show what a scared little coward you are. And people like me see right through you, and all we do is laugh.

Try a little kindness instead. Then, when a bigger bully comes for you, we just might come to your defense instead of laughing at you.

Cyber-bullies are the biggest cowards of all.

Bullies are cowards, but Cyber-bullies are the biggest, most pathetic ones.

They sit in the safety of their homes or their mom’s basements, attics, and backyard sheds. And they hide behind fake profiles and screen names, trolling the internet and social media in search of victims.

If you’ve ever dealt with a cyber-bully, I knew how you feel. Words do have power and it’s easy to be hurt when anyone attacks you, online or off. I, too used to get upset when I’d look at my instant messages and find that some idiot had sent me a flamer.

However, today, I’ve learned to see it for what it is and the cyber-bullies for who they are. And that in itself can be a real boost to the self-esteem.

When I think of the term “cyber-bully,” I instantly get a mental picture of one of two types of people:

1. Some broke, unemployed and shirtless fat guy sitting and typing on a computer in his granny’s basement, while stuffing his face with Cheetos and sporting a man-bun.

2. A skinny, pimple-faced, bespectacled geek who only trolls the net to compensate for his lack of sex and a social life in the real world.

Occasionally, I still deal with cyberbullies. When I do, one of those pathetic pictures immediately pops up in my mind. And I can’t help but chuckle to myself.

Bullies are Cowards:

If they have time to troll the internet, they can’t be about much.

Because cyber-bullies often use a fake profile or screen name with either a blank photo or one that’s fake, it only shows that they’re faceless cowards and not to be taken seriously.

These losers talk so big and tough behind that keyboard- oh, yeah! They’re real badasses online. But you can bet that if they ever saw you on the street, they wouldn’t have the sack to step up.

So, ask yourself these questions.

Should I take these wusses so seriously?
Should I give these worthless schmucks the power to make us feel bad about ourselves?
Should I value their useless gibberish?

I can’t speak for anyone else. However, I have a hard time valuing the worthless opinions of anyone who doesn’t have a name or face.

Any person who’s a Rambo in cyberspace but a George McFly on the street, I can only take with a horselaugh and a grain of salt.

You either have a big, brass pair or you don’t.

It takes a real zero to spend even a few hours a day trolling other users. You just know that the person has no ambition, no prospects, and no life.

Understand that when you’re cyber-bullied, often you’re dealing with a poor soul who is bored, lonely, and miserable.

And the only way they can feel good about themselves and have power is to do what they’re doing now.

Therefore, if you are cyber-bullied online, you shouldn’t put too much stock in their opinions. Their words don’t carry a lot of weight.

Understand that cyber-bullies are often people who flame others because they’re insecure, self-loathing, and have nothing going for them. Online is the only way these pathetic losers can have a social life.

That alone speaks volumes about the kind of people they are and the crappy lives they lead. So, again, should you take these losers seriously? Are they worth getting angry or depressed over?

These idiots can’t make you feel bad about yourself unless you allow them to.

Bullies are Cowards:

For words to have power over you, you must first consider the source.

Though words have power, and they can hurt you, you should always consider the source. Because in truth, most cyber-bullies live miserable existences and should only be pitied.

Yet, victims are (mistakenly) branded as cowards. They are the ones who come to school or work and face bullies… alone, no matter how viciously they get brutalized.

Through all the name-calling, the taunts, the brutal beatings, and the threats to their lives, targets manage to reach within themselves and push through another day.

To endure abuse every single day for several years and still find the resolve to soldier on? Now that takes courage! Targets of bullying are the real warriors! Notice I didn’t say victim.

It takes bravery to be a target of relentless bullying and remain standing tall. To endure bouts of daily and constant abuse and make it to the finish line of high school graduation or the end-of-week paycheck? That takes guts!

To stay in the race, while most bullies drop out of school or quit their jobs when the going gets tough? That’s not only brave, but it’s also heroic! To be your own hero? That takes bravery, bullies will never have.

So take advantage of it and shut your bullies down for good! You don’t have to be an easy target.

This post explained why bullies are cowards so that their games DON’T have the effect on you they once did and you can feel better about yourself knowing that you aren’t them.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How to Shut Down a Bully: 11 Comebacks that Stop Them Cold

2. Easy Targets for Bullies: 6 Groups of People Bullies Love to Target

3. Passive-Aggressive Bullying: 7 Hallmarks of Sneak Dissing

Is Bullying Natural? 3 Cop Outs Bullies Use for Excuses

July 28, 2025July 28, 202511 Comments

Is bullying natural? Some people think so, and some do not. Here are all the details you need to know.

Many people say that bullying is only natural selection. Additionally, they may refer to it as Darwinism. They may even say that bullying is all about survival of the fittest.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn to look further into to the age-old question, “Is bullying natural?”. Also, you will learn all about bullying, natural selection, Darwinism, and survival of the fittest so that you can make your own judgments.

Once you learn all about these details, you will be able to draw more informed conclusions.

Is bullying natural? This post may or may not give you the answer you’re looking for. However, it will prompt you to conduct some research and draw your own conclusions.

Is Bullying Natural?

Anytime I hear people refer to bullying as either of the three mentioned in this article’s title, I find it cringeworthy at best! And the words that immediately flash through my mind are “cop-out,” “trivialization,” and “excuses.”

However, the more research I do, the more I’m convinced that it is a dark part of human nature. However, it doesn’t mean it’s natural, per se. Moreover, it damn sure isn’t right, and people shouldn’t do it.

Many bullies use the natural selection, Darwinism, and survival of the fittest science as excuses to continue their behavior.

And that is what pisses me off!

When bullies describe their behavior as one of these three things, they are essentially saying that their behavior is entirely normal. Therefore, they don’t have to stop the abuse.

They’re also saying that victims are weak and undesirable. And that they should be eliminated from the human race. Moreover, they believe that bullying is required for the survival of the human race.

Bullying is not normal.

Bullying is anything but normal. It is brutal, malicious, hurtful, and cowardly.

Victims of bullying are not weak. And they are not undesirable. They may think differently from most. They are often exceptional people with brilliant minds.

Many celebrities, CEOs, inventors, writers, scientists, doctors, and professors were bullied in school. Moreover, some of them have been bullied in the workplace as adults. However, they survived.

If these people had not survived, the world might never have seen many awesome inventions. Many breakthroughs never would have happened.

For example, Edison might not have invented the electric light bulb. Bell may not have finished inventing the telephone.

Perhaps we would never have seen the first organ transplant. Where would we be without these people?

Bullying may be a dark part of human nature. But, I would not go so far as to say that it’s natural or normal.

Is Bullying Natural?

Bullying only destroys the human race.

An example of this would be the Nazi’s bullying of Jews during World War II. As a result, they ended up slaughtering six million of them during the holocaust.

Now, do you still think that bullying is necessary for the survival of our species?

Bullying is never okay! And sadly, I’ve heard many people refer to it as one of the above three. Understand that this is only a cop-out.

It’s a way to blame victims. And, it’s an excuse not to help those who are bullied.

If you are a bully or bystander and believe this garbage, then you are only lying to yourself. If you’re a victim, rest assured that you are not weak, nor are you undesirable.

It only means that you are brave enough to think outside the box. Moreover, you refuse to be a follower.

Those are characteristics that you should be proud of. Why? Because you have the opportunity to go far and make a difference in society.

Therefore, don’t give up! Give yourself a chance! You never know. In the future, you may be the person who brings positive change to the world. And your bullies will more than likely end up living less than desirable lives.

So, what are Darwinism, natural selection, and survival of the fittest?

Is Bullying Natural?

What is Darwinism and Natural Selection?

There are 3 cop outs bullies hide behind. Darwinism, Natural Selection, and Survival of the Fittest.

Darwinism refers to the theory of natural selection. In other words, humans and animals choose mates based on their preferred inherited genes and traits. For instance, partners are likely to select those with specific physical and mental characteristics over others.

The purpose of this is to ensure the production of healthier offspring. That’s fine and dandy. I get that. However, bullying has nothing to do with natural selection. Why? Because bullying is abuse.

It’s one thing not to prefer a particular person for a relationship or friendship. That’s okay because we like what we like. However, when a bully sets out to bully a target, they must stalk them to do it.

Again, bullying is abuse. Natural selection doesn’t involve bullying. You choose certain people over others. And it doesn’t have to involve bullying.

This is why Darwinism and Natural Selection are excuses bullies use to cop out behind.

When you choose a particular person over the other, it doesn’t involve bullying the other. In other words, just because someone chooses someone else over you, it doesn’t mean they’re out to harm you. Bullying, on the other hand, seeks to do deliberate harm.

What is Survival of the Fittest?

Survival of the fittest is the theory that organisms best suited to their environment are more likely to survive, reproduce, and pass their superior genes to their offspring.

Again, this doesn’t involve bullying. It simply means that those who are best suited to their environments are more likely to survive. For instance, an Inuit can survive in cold climates. In contrast, someone from the tropics will have a hard time adapting and surviving in the Arctic.

It doesn’t involve bullying.

Is Bullying Natural?

5 myths about bullying we need to be aware of

Myths are often mistaken for facts. Therefore, they can obscure people’s judgment. They can also blind you to bullying behavior, even when it’s happening right in front of your face.

Moreover, myths can even make it hard for a person to know when someone is abusing them.

Here are a few myths to be aware of:

Myth 1. Targets are weak losers who deserve bullying.

People suffering at the hands of bullies are not weak, nor are they losers. Over the past decade or so, we have found that bullies tend to target those who are genuinely good people with kind hearts.

Bullies are evil people who perceive goodness, kindness, and generosity as weaknesses. Therefore, they target people who have these qualities.

Additionally, bullies often target those who are multi-talented, star achievers, and performers. Understand that bullies perceive these individuals as a threat to their power. Why? One-upmanship is one way bullies can feel a sense of power.

When high-achieving targets outshine bullies, they unwittingly provoke jealous rage in them. And these bullies will pull out all the stops to make them pay and set them up to fail.

If nothing else, understand this! Bullies hate to be outshone, outdone, or beaten at anything! Nobody deserves bullying. Ever! Bullying is harmful and can destroy someone’s life.

There are myths about bullying that don’t help.

Is Bullying Natural?

Myth 2. Bullies are brave, strong, cool, exciting, and in control.

Ha! Bullies are the opposite of these things. Let’s explain further.

Bullies are brave.

Nope! Bullies are great, big cowards, but they’re good at hiding it. Bullies live by the motto that strength comes in numbers, so they run around in packs. They hide their cowardice behind groups of sycophants or flying monkeys.

You will never catch a bully alone because a bully doesn’t know how to stand alone. Their followers are there to support them and do their bidding.

Bullies get their power from an entourage. Without their wingmen to cover them, they would be powerless.

Bullies are strong.

No! Bullies are weak. However, they hide that behind a veneer of aggression and false bravado. Understand that bullies draw their power from the fear they instill in others.

What bullies are is a bunch of bluffs, blowhards, and windbags. The tough act they put on is a way they hide their weaknesses.

Bullies are cool.

Wrong! Bullies are pathetic. They bluff, they posture, and they one-up people. They always have to be better than anyone else.

All of this are signs of insecurity and self-loathing. Because if they were secure in themselves, they wouldn’t resort to this kind of buffoonery.

Is Bullying Natural?

Bullies are exciting.

They may seem exciting at first, but they quickly become boring. Why? Because they’ll talk incessantly about themselves.

They will brag and showboat until you’ll want to chew off your arm to get away from them. And they won’t be so exciting once they turn on you.

Bullies are in control.

Really? Is that what you want to call it? Um… not!

Bullies can’t control themselves and their own pathetic lives. So, they seek to control you to feel powerful. And in doing that, they not only create victims, they also develop enemies who hate them with a passion.

If you’re a bully, you may only control someone to a certain degree. You may put the fear of God in them. But you’ll never control what they think of you and how they feel about you.

Why? Because the mind and thoughts are free. And if you run across a person who has a strong sense of self and doesn’t fall for your guff, what are you going to do then?

Is Bullying Natural?

Myth 3. “Bullying is a normal rite of passage that all kids endure.”

Not so. There’s nothing normal about bullying. It’s perverse, twisted, and sick.

Bullying only speaks volumes about their own mental imbalance and lack of character. A bully’s behavior doesn’t reflect on you. It only reflects on them.

And the more we learn about bullying, the more evidence we seem to get that supports this.

Myth 4. Bullying builds character.

No, it doesn’t. It tears it down. Why? Because it erodes the confidence you were born with. It causes anxiety because, when you’re bullied, you no longer feel safe.

Myth 5. Bullying is only Natural Selection and Survival of the Fittest.

It may be a dark part of human nature. But a reason doesn’t equal an excuse. Bullies and their enablers often use this little line as an excuse to normalize their pathetic behavior.

It’s important to dispel these myths. So, do not fall for this garbage.

Never blame yourself for other people’s crappy behavior. Hold on to your truth. And if anyone rattles off any of the above lines to you when you speak out against bullying, counter them and do it with conviction.

Is Bullying Natural?

In Closing:

Bullies are all about abusing others, then making excuses for it. Even bystanders and schools make excuses for bullies. And the myths only serve to encourage bullies and blame victims.

However, bullying is harmful, and it can be dangerous to victims! The effects are often devastating.

Therefore, the next time someone bullies you and makes excuses for it, call them out on their bullshit. And do it straight to their faces.

See their behavior for what it is. Abuse!

This post was all about whether bullying is natural so that you can recognize hogwash and counter it confidently.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Bullying Myths: 5 Widely-Held Beliefs about Bullies and Victims

2. Excuses Schools Make for Bullies: Here are 7 Most Common

3. Effects of Bullying on the Victim: 13 Symptoms of Bullied People

bullying and school shootings statistics

Bullying and School Shootings: 8 Facts You Need to Know

July 23, 2025July 15, 202515 Comments

‘Want to know about bullying and school shootings and why you should think before you act?

According to Science Direct, “Approximately 88% of school shooters had at least one social media account, and 76% posted disturbing content of guns and threatening messages. Over 72% of shooters had at least one reported adverse childhood experience, and 60% reported being bullied in-person or online.”

Therefore, in this post, you will learn about bullying and school shootings. Moreover, you will learn why taking a gun to school is wrong whether or not you were bullied. And thirdly, you will learn all the consequences of it to yourself and everyone else.

Once you learn all about this life-saving information, you will be compelled to seek out better ways to handle it if you’re a victim of bullying.

Bullying and School Shootings

Many victims of bullying end up destroying their own lives and the lives of others by taking a gun to school and murdering their classmates. This must stop now!

However, before we get into the nitty gritty of this topic, let’s first talk about the widespread occurrences of victims using their victim-hood as an entitlement to wrongdoing.

The Dangers of Copping Out Behind Victimization

Sadly, too many victims use victimization as justification for wrongdoing. They feel that because they suffered, life owes them somehow.

In fact, I’ve seen people mistreat others merely because of the bullying they suffered in the past. Why? Because they think it’s the only way they can feel empowered again.

For example, some people may choose to rob a bank. Maybe they burn down a corporate building because they grew up poor and didn’t get a fair shake in life.

Again, they feel that the world owes them. Moreover, they feel justified in striking back against a system they believe screwed them over.

Moreover, when the law finally catches them and hauls them off to jail, they become even more embittered. Why? Because the perpetrator feels that accountability only further evidences that they aren’t getting a fair shake.

However, here’s the reality many don’t want to accept. We’re still responsible for our actions regardless of what happened to us in the past.

Here are 8 facts you need to know!

1. Bullying and School Shootings:

Victim-hood does not exempt you from consequences.

Evil behavior always brings consequences. You reap what you sow.

Therefore, past victimization does not justify wrongdoing. Ever! A reason does not equal an excuse.

Even if you’re a victim of bullying, you’re still responsible for your life.

Therefore, why not learn from the bullying you suffer. Because, believe it or not, there are lessons in it. Let it teach you something. Also, let it motivate you to create a better life for yourself later.

Realize that school is only one chapter of your life, not the entire book. And know that things will get better. They did for me and they will for you too.

Many school shootings have happen in the past thirty years. We have Columbine, Santa Fe, Parkland, and Marjory Stoneman Douglas.

Therefore, it compels me to write about something which isn’t discussed enough. It’s no surprise that bullying is a factor most school shootings.

It seems that most of today’s kids don’t have the emotional strength that those of mine and older generations had. So again, let me remind you.

Being bullied is no excuse for taking human lives.

2. Your feelings are valid but your actions aren’t.

Not if you shoot someone.

Yes. Bullying can push you to the breaking point. And yes, after years of relentless and repetitive bullying, it’s easy to snap.

Believe me, I know how it feels when school staff cruelly rebuff you when you report bullying. However, bringing a gun to school and using it isn’t the answer.

Even if you do knock off a few of your bullies and turn the gun on yourself after you’re done, you’ll still leave death and mayhem in your wake!

Those left behind will still be here to deal with what you did. And, I promise you. You’ll leave your family and the families of the ones you took in utter devastation! In fact, you’ll destroy an entire community!

And people will remember what a coward you were. All because you chose to use a gun instead of your fists! They’ll always remember how you offed yourself to avoid going to prison.

And they will talk about it for years to come. Is that the legacy you want to leave behind? You have to think before you act!

Bullying and school Shootings:

Columbine

I have read many articles about the Columbine Shooting in April of 1999. Many experts stated that the perpetrators, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, had been bullied for years.

They said that the boys had gotten fed up with the continuous negative treatment. As a result, they finally went into a rage and lashed out. Sadly, many more victims of bullying have followed their example since.

I cannot stress enough how counterproductive it is to bring a gun to school! However, I believe there is something we’re missing here.

Somewhere along the way, parents have lost the ability to talk to kids about the consequence of their actions. Moreover, the mental health industry has also failed.

I know I’m going to piss a lot of people off. But, I’m going to be honest. I think that they’re in it more for the money than they are to help bullied kids. This is only my opinion.

3. public schools and the mental health industry work together.

It’s no secret that public schools and the mental health industry work together. Also, bullying in schools keeps the mental health machine humming.

It keeps the lobbies of mental health centers packed with fresh, young patients. Moreover, it keeps the pharmaceutical companies purring too.

They profit from shoving anti-depressants down these kids’ throats. Then, they send them on their way. In many cases, schools are the ones that recommend kids to these mental health facilities.

Hmmm… is it any wonder public schools do nothing to reduce bullying rates? ‘Gotta keep those mental health centers cashing in! Right?

And they have to keep Big Pharma’s pockets fat too. Mental health has become a cash cow these past few decades.

Not to mental, bullying, mental health, and school shootings make good political fodder. It keeps the left pushing for gun control and the right pushing to arm teachers and tighten school security.

Therefore, it keeps the political machine humming as well.

Bullying and School Shootings:

Teaching Bullies and Victims Personal Responsibility

Each incidence could have been prevented. Moreover, we CAN prevent the next shooting… before it happens?

Many want to preach about gun control. But, how about holding bullies accountable and teaching them better ways to deal with their emotions? How about teaching victims confidence and proper ways to defend themselves?

And what about telling victims the truth? The cold, hard truth! That no one is coming to rescue them and it’s their responsibility to defend themselves!

Why? Because life’s not fair and it never will be. Most bullies are charming and convincing. Moreover, they will find ways of escaping accountability.

The point is that everyone has a responsibility here.

4. When You Shoot Bullies, You make them the victims.

Again, no matter how horribly you are treated, it doesn’t give you the right to harm someone. No matter how angry, sad or lonely you are, it is never okay to take a life. NEVER!

A cause is never an excuse. The only thing that justifies killing another human being is if they’re threatening your life or the lives of your family.

Murder is wrong. Moreover, there are better and more productive ways to handle bullying.

Let’s put it another way. When you kill someone, you no longer get to claim victim-hood. Instead, you immediately become the aggressor and make your bully the victim!

Sorry. It is what it is!

You must understand that this is exactly what bullies want. They want to look like the victim in the eyes of others.

And they want to do it while sneakily torturing you and making you look like the bad guy. Therefore, by shooting them, you only make it so much easier for them to do that.

Remember that bullies are masters at feigning victim-hood. It’s the reason they go unpunished while you look guilty as hell.

Think about it. And think hard! Your bullies have looked innocent and vilified you for so long!Why then would you want to help them look like bigger victims?

5. Bullying and School Shootings:

When you shoot someone, your bullies’ lies about you become the truth!

Your bullies have already destroyed your reputation. Shooting them would only transform their lies into the truth.

You’ll only prove that you really are despicable person. In other words, you’ll only confirm that they were right about you all along.

Here’s another possible scenario. If you shoot your bullies, you will make them heroes. People will engrave their names on a memorial at the school. On the other hand, they’ll regard your name with contempt and disgust.

You will go down in infamy. People will view you as a disgusting and vile monster. Whereas, they’ll remember your bullies as martyrs. Seriously! Is that what you want???

Therefore, when you take the life of another human being, you not only put shame on yourself. You also put shame on your family!

Do you really want to put the people who love you through that kind of humiliation? Once you kill someone, you can never correct it! You can never bring them back!

6. If you take a life, it won’t matter that you suffered bullying.

Nicolas Cruz didn’t think about this when he snapped and decided to go to Marjorie Stoneman Douglas High School and shoot his classmates. Yes. He was a victim of bullying.

The other kids considered him to be “weird”. One of his classmates, Emma Gonzales even admitted to bullying him.

However, he chose to handle it incorrectly. He picked up a gun and shot several classmates.

Therefore, the fact that he was bullied is no longer relevant. That’s. Just. Reality!

Bullying and School Shootings:

**7. If you shoot someone without just cause, no one will care why you did it.**

They won’t give a damn what your reasons were! And it’s the same attitude with Nicholas Cruz. Nobody cares that he was bullied. Nobody cares that he was pushed over the edge

The only thing that matters is that several kids are dead because of him. And if you allow your bullies to drive you to committing murder, the same will go for you.

Yes, bullying is a hell only few can comprehend. I understand the intense rage. It builds to a climax after so many years of putting up with abuse.

Moreover, I understand the feeling of hopelessness. I’ve been there… in the trenches! But! You must think before you act.

Keep your wits about you no matter how badly people bully you.

You must learn to think ahead. This means thinking of the possible consequences you’ll face. Moreover, it means considering how it’ll devastate your family, not only theirs.

Think about what it would do to your future! How many prospects and opportunities would disappear, just like that!

8. Your bullies aren’t worth it!

Don’t do it! Think before you act! There are better ways to conquer bullies and bullying.

Therefore, take revenge by taking care of yourself. Make positive changes in your life. Transfer to another school and reinvent yourself if you must. It’s what I did!

Find your purpose. Set and accomplish your goals. Strive for self-betterment! If people don’t value you, then you need to create your own value.

This could be as simple as doing something you’re good at and winning an award for it. Or making an A on a test!

Instead of picking up a gun, pick up as many successes as you can. Instead of a gun, let SUCCESS be your weapon of choice! Why? Because, as Frank Sinatra quoted, “being wildly successful is the best revenge you can ever take.”

It’s about self! Make it about you and what you can achieve! Screw your bullies! They don’t matter. In fact, they don’t deserve the privilege of being in your life!

Make a lot of money! Win a truckload of awards! Write a book! Cut a CD… whatever fulfills you!

Make as many accomplishments and happy moments as humanly possible! Create your own value with SUCCESS!

This post is all about bullying and school shootings so that you’ll think before you do something drastic. Moreover, you’ll find more constructive ways to handle bullying.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Standing Up to Bullies: 7 Ways Bullies React When You Stop Taking Their Crap

2. Setting Boundaries: 3 Powerful Practices to Hold Your Ground

3. Self-Preservation Instinct: Defending Yourself from Bullies is Okay!

4. Your First Line of Defense Against Bullying

5. How to Shut Down a Bully: 11 Comebacks that Stop Them Cold

When the Bullied Become Bullies

July 5, 2025October 18, 20255 Comments

‘Want to know what happens when the bullied become bullies? Here are all the mechanics of it that you need to know.

It’s too easy to become a bully yourself when you’re a victim of bullying. It’s just too easy!

After others have abused you for so long, you search for ways to take the edge off the pain. You search for any band-aid, as long as it takes away some of the pain, even if it’s only temporary.

Most of all, you search for ways to take back some of the power that they have taken from you.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn what happens when the bullied become the bullies. Also, you will how they do so that you will recognize it if it happens to you.

Once you learn all about these details, you will be able to catch it before you become an abuser and begin working on yourself so that you don’t become one.

This post is all about what happens when the bullied become bullies and how they become aggressors, so that you can make sure that it doesn’t happen to you, too.

When the Bullied Become Bullies

Sadly, many targets become bullies themselves because they’re just plain tired of feeling powerless. They want to have control over something- or someone!

We all want to be in control of something because to have power over nothing is the very definition of hell!

It’s hard to feel empathy when you’re being bullied by everyone.

When you’re a victim of bullying, people often accuse you of being selfish and out for your interests. However, anytime people bully you, the pain of it only blunts your capacity to feel for others.

In other words, any time you suffer severe abuse long-term, your pain overrides any ability to empathize with those around you, who may also be hurting.

It’s like lying in the emergency room after a car accident with both legs broken. The pain is so intense that you couldn’t care less about the patient in the next room.

All you’re thinking of is how soon a doctor will see you and give you something for pain.

For instance, you’re a teenager and you’re mistreated in high school. Two classmates die in a horrific car accident. You may not admit it. But, chances are that you probably won’t care less.

Now, you probably won’t feel the same later. However, right now, you just don’t give a damn. You have no feeling for them because they bullied you when they were alive.

Moreover, you may think that the two bitches got what was coming to them. You’ll even feel a sense of sweet justice. Even worse, you may wish for a few more of them to drop dead soon.

Nevertheless, if your class picks on you badly and for long enough, you probably won’t even have it in you to care.

This is why it’s important to get out of the environment. And you must leave before the bullying you suffer has time to harden your heart.

When the Bullied Become Bullies:

When people mistreat you, you soon turn cold.

After people jerk you around long enough, you withdraw from others and put up a barrier. Next, you turn mean and begin to harden yourself just to numb feelings of rejection and the pain that comes with it.

Before long, you look at the feelings and suffering of others with indifference. Again, you just don’t give a damn about anyone, how they feel or what they think.

Moreover, you no longer have any respect for others, much less yourself. Lastly, you come to that evil place where schadenfreude takes hold, and you secretly take pleasure in seeing others, especially those you despise, suffer.

In short, you turn cold and unfeeling. And it only brings resentment from people who might otherwise offer love and support.

being tormented can make you powerless if you let it.

And nothing makes you powerless like having people abuse you left and right. Especially if they get physical!

When you’re constantly picked on, you feel powerless. So, you’ll do anything, and I mean anything, to have some semblance of power.

You learn very quickly to become a bully yourself to reclaim that power. Because you’re being tormented, you find others to torment. You learn that, to stay off the bottom of the pecking order, you must find victims of your own to degrade and humiliate.

Often, bullied children and teens feel helpless. They feel that they have no control over anything in their lives. Therefore, they become aggressors to feel some sense of power and control over something.

When the Bullied become Bullies:

Crap Rolls Downhill and Lands on the bottom.

They often mistreat others who are even more powerless than they are. And they do it just to make themselves feel better. Crap always rolls downhill and lands at the bottom.

Therefore, no one wants to be at the bottom of the social hierarchy. Some people fight to stay on top. However, others fight just as hard to stay off the bottom.

For example, a child gets yelled at by parents, then goes outside and kicks the dog. It is the same with most victims. You’ve got to have control over something.

In Mistreating you, They teach you to torment others.

Your bullies teach you that bullying another person is what you must do to feel good about yourself. Moreover, they teach you that it’s what it takes to climb the social ladder.

You think, “Why not? It’s keeping my bullies off the bottom, so it should keep me off it too.”

I tell you this because I did the same thing. And I’m sorry to admit this. I allowed my tormentors to change me from a caring, loving child to a vicious teenager.

I had become someone I no longer recognized. I had once been friendly and accepting of everyone, regardless of what they had. And now, I was this cruel and mean human being.

I was beautiful to look at. But I was ugly as hell on the inside. Because others judged me, I judged others. Because I was being bullied, I began bullying others.

And how did I learn to do that? My bullies taught me! And they taught me by doing the same to me.

Even worse, I was cunning with it. There were times when I got caught and was punished. However, there were more times when I avoided accountability.

When the Bullied become Bullies:

You sow discord because you become jealous of others’ friendships.

I got my kicks out of seeing others’ friendships end. At different times in high school, I instigated fights between other people. Then, I stood back and watched the results of my handiwork.

And I did it proudly! I enjoyed watching the two girls that I had very stealthily turned against each other. They would duke it out while I laughed inside while and hid it with a false look of concern.

I had no real friendships. So, I wanted to destroy other people’s friendships to feel like I was not the only one. It was better to have someone else suffering along with me than to suffer alone.

But here’s the problem. Bullies are weak, cowardly, and pathetic. So, I was no better than they were. I was worse than they were because I knew firsthand how it felt. I knew better, but I did it anyway.

Today, I’m sorry for the way I treated those victims.

Take it from someone who’s tried it. If you mistreat others, you may get a rush of power. However, it won’t last long. It wears off quickly. Then, you’ll be back to square one.

And if you don’t typically bully, it will only eat away at your conscience! Therefore, set boundaries so that you won’t feel the need to bully others.

Why not make friends with other victims? Be a Buddy to them, not a bully!

And, instead of tormenting other victims, align with them. Become their friend and their protector. I guarantee you! You’ll feel much better about yourself.

More importantly, you’ll make a positive difference in their lives, and there’s no better feeling than that!

You’ll help uplift them. And you’ll make them feel better about themselves! Heck! You might even save a life!

Today, droves of victims are dying by suicide. If you could be the difference between someone ending their life and deciding that life’s worth living? Wouldn’t that feel great? Knowing you kept someone from taking their life?

It’s more rewarding than you realize! Knowing that you were possibly the difference that kept that person from ending their own life is a feeling so wonderful, words can’t describe it! I promise you!

So, if you know that someone is weaker than you, give them strength by being a friend. If you know someone else who people abuse just like they do you, align with them. Why? Because they need a friend, and so do you. You can’t lose!

This post is all about what happens when the bullied become bullies so that you can be a buddy instead of a bully yourself.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Physical Bullying Information: 5 Must-Know Secrets Bullies Don’t Want You to Know

2. Lack of Boundaries: 15 Signs You Need to Get Some

3. Bullying by Teachers: 15 Proven Signs a Teacher is Bullying You

4. Bullying by Teachers in School: 7 Steps to Protect Yourself

Bullying Myths: 5 Widely-Held Beliefs about Bullies and Victims

June 12, 2025July 28, 20258 Comments

‘Want to know all the widely-held bullying myths that you need to bust right now? Here are all the wrong beliefs you need to know about.

People often mistake myths for facts and obscure people’s judgment. Myths can also blind you to bullying behavior, even when it’s happening right in front of your face. In fact, they can even make it hard for you to know when someone is abusing you.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn about all the bullying myths that are floating around and the facts that debunk them.

Once you learn all about these falsehoods, you will be able to see bullying exactly for what it is. Moreover, you will learn the facts about bullying rather than be misled by a bunch of myths.

This post is all about bullying myths so that you can better discern bullying facts from fiction.

Bullying Myths

There are many myths floating around about bullies and victims. And they’re wrong. Therefore, you must bust those myths if you’re a victim of bullying and you expect to get a fair shake.

Here are all the myths.

1. Victims are weak losers who deserve bullying.

Despite all the available information about bullying, there are people who still believe that you’re weak if you suffer at the hands of bullies. Moreover, they also believe that you’re a loser.

However, know this! You are not weak, nor are you a loser. In the past twenty years or so, we have found that bullies don’t only target people who are physically impaired in some way.

Moreover, they don’t only victimize those with mental handicaps or those who have difficulty in social situations. In fact, bullies target mostly those who are good people with hearts of gold.

Anyone who is multi-talented can fall victim of bullying. Star achievers and performers often suffer bullying because they’re exceptional.

However, understand that bullies perceive these people to be threats to their power.

When high-achieving targets outshine bullies, especially those with narcissism, they unwittingly provoke jealousy. Therefore, bullies will pull out all the stops to make them pay.

If nothing else, understand this! Bullies hate to be beaten at anything!

Nobody deserves bullying. Ever! Bullying is harmful and can destroy someone’s life. You must realize that bullies are evil people who are predatory by nature. So, learn to see them for who they are.

2. Bullying Myths:

Bullies are brave, strong, cool, exciting, and in control.

Ha! Bullies are the opposite of these things. Let me break it down for you.

Bullies are brave.

Nope! Bullies are great, big cowards! They’re only good at hiding it. Bullies live by the motto that strength comes in numbers. Therefore, they run around in packs.

They hide their cowardice behind groups of flying monkeys. You will never catch a bully alone because a bully doesn’t know how to stand alone.

The bullies’ followers are there to back them up and do their dirty work. Realize that bullies get their power from an entourage.

Without their wing-men to cover them, they would be powerless.

Bullies are strong.

‘Taint so! Bullies are weak. They only hide it behind aggression, loudness, and false bravado. Moreover, bullies will instill unnecessary fear in you if you allow it.

‘You see? Bullies are notorious bluffs and blowhards. The tough act they put on is a way they hide their weakness.

And your fear is where they draw their power. Therefore, don’t be afraid of these windbags! Stand up to them and do it confidently.

Then, they’ll likely leave you alone and go find someone else to mess with.

Bullying Myths:

Bullies are cool.

Au contraire! Bullies are pathetic. They bluff, they posture, and they’re notorious one-uppers. It’s how some of them achieved their popularity.

Moreover, they always have to be king of the hill and better than anyone else. All of this is a sign of insecurity and self-loathing.

Why? Because if they were secure in themselves, they wouldn’t resort to this type of buffoonery. People who are happy, confident and secure with themselves have nothing to prove.

Therefore, they don’t go around trying to intimidate others to get their point across.

Bullies are exciting.

They may seem exciting at first, but they get boring pretty quick. Why? Because bullies are notorious for talking incessantly about themselves.

In other words, they brag and showboat until you want to chew off your arm just to get away from them. And they won’t be so exciting when they turn on you.

Bullies are in control.

Really? Is that what you want to call it? Um…not!

Bullies can’t control their own pathetic lives. So, they seek to control you in order to feel powerful.

And in doing that, they create enemies who hate them with a passion. Bullies may control their victims to a certain degree. And they may put the fear of God in them.

However, they’ll never control what those victims think of them. Because the mind and thoughts are free.

And if they run across someone who has a strong sense of self, what are they going to do then? Some people won’t fall for their guff.

3. Bullying Myths:

Bullying is a normal rite of passage that all people endure.

Not so. There’s nothing normal about bullying. Moreover, it’s not a rite of passage. And there are many people who never suffer bullying.

Therefore, another bullying myth bites the dust!

Here’s what bullying is. It’s perverse, twisted, and sick. Bullying only speaks volumes of the bully’s lack of character. It never reflects on you.

Bullying is always a reflection of the bully’s insecurity, jealousy, and hidden rage. And the more we learn about it, the more evidence we get that supports this.

4. Bullying builds character.

No, it doesn’t. It tears it down and suppresses it.

Bullying instills fear in its victims. It makes them afraid to relax and be themselves. People don’t feel safe when bullies target them.

In fact, being bullied can cause victims to shut down. And they bury parts of themselves for their own safety.

As a result, bullying can lead to low self-esteem and poor mental health. So, stand up to bullies and they’ll likely leave you alone.

5. Bullying Myths:

Bullying is only Darwinism, Natural Selection, or Survival of the Fittest.

It may be a dark part of human nature, but a reason doesn’t equal an excuse. Bullies and their enablers often use this line as an excuse for their rotten behavior.

Moreover, supporters of it say this to normalize this despicable and pathetic behavior.

This is why it’s important not to fall for these myths. You must dispel them to protect yourself.

And never blame yourself for someone else’s crappy behavior. Hold on to your truth.

If anyone rattles off any of the above lines when you speak out against bullying, counter those statements. And do it with conviction!

Other facts about bullying

1. You can never appease a bully.

Never! This goes no matter what you do to satisfy the bullies and no matter how many times you tell them what they want to hear.

If you submit to them, your bullies may go away and leave you alone for the time being. However, they always come back for more.

Bullying Myths:

You can never submit your way out of being abused.

Put another way, the more you submit, the more your bullies will hound you. Why? Because it’s how they get what they want from you.

Moreover, by cowing down to them, you make yourself look weak. And bullies prey on weakness.

Therefore, stand up to them and they’ll leave you alone.

Sometimes it takes a final showdown before your bullies will finally give you the respect you deserve and go find another target to bully. Think of the movie “Tombstone.”

2. Bullies thrive on your fear of retaliation and further harm.

Know that your fear is understandable because it is a natural human response to danger. So, I don’t blame you for it.

However, you must realize that your bullies thrive on your perfectly normal fear response. And they will exploit it every chance they get!

Why? Because your fear has, so far, gotten them what they want. So, why would they stop?

Begin standing up to these creeps! You may face the possibility of getting beat within an inch of your life. But you’ll never improve your situations unless you learn to take risks.

3. Bullying myths:

Bullies only understand strength and power. They do not understand reason, diplomacy, nor politeness.

There are no polite ways to handle bullies. Also, you can never reason with them.

Realize that bullies only see niceties, pleasantries, and politeness as weaknesses to exploit and manipulate.

Therefore, you must communicate with your bullies in the only language they understand. You must meet them exactly where they are.

This means refusing to be afraid to set boundaries. And when you set your boundaries, you must do it firmly and mean it!

Moreover, you cannot just set boundaries and expect your bullies to respect them. You must also enforce those boundaries with consequences.

Why? Because your bullies will see this as a challenge. And you can best believe they will rise to that challenge.

In other words, they will violate your newly established boundaries just to dare you and prove to you that they can. And when they do, make sure that the consequences are severe enough to make them stop!

The consequences must be so severe that your bullies won’t even want to look in your direction again, much less mess with you.

This is how you earn respect!

In closing, realize that your bullies want you to believe these myths. They do not want you to know the facts. Moreover, supporters of bullying also want you to believe it because they like to side with bullies. Therefore, do your research. Once you learn the truth your bullies try to hide, you’ll feel more confident in yourself. I promise!

This post was all about bullying myths and facts so that you’ll know that the bullying you suffer is no reflection on you and that bullies are more pathetic than you think.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Important Facts About Bullying: 3 Truths You Must Learn

2. Things School Bullies Try to Hide: 13 Things They’re Ashamed Of

3. Fear of Setting Boundaries: 5 Reasons You Don’t Stand Up to Bullies

4. Facts About Respect: 9 Time-Tested Truths You Must Know

Bullying Survival Mode: 5 Things Victims of Bullying Do Wrong

May 29, 2025June 18, 20257 Comments

‘Want to know about bullying survival and how victims in survival mode can make poor decisions if they aren’t careful? Here are all the mistakes to avoid.

When you’re stuck in survival mode, it negatively effects your judgment and your ability to make decisions.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn about the bullying survival mode effect and how it effects your life.

Once you learn all about this important information, you will be able to make better, more sound choices and avoid the pitfalls that bullying and survival mode can trap you in.

This post is all about the bullying survival mode effect so that you can recognize the signs of it and do what you must do to avoid it.

Bullying survival mode

It’s not enough just to survive bullying. You must overcome it. Why? Because it can have a terrible effect on your life.

Here are all the things you can do wrong if you aren’t careful.

1. You find it necessary to lie.

I’ve never told one lie in my entire life, and that’s no lie! Ha! Shyeah, right!

Let’s face it, we’ve all told some big ones in our lives, myself included. And yes, even you have. No one is perfect and there are many reasons why people lie- too many to list.

However, victims of bullying lie for totally different reasons than most. Most victims of bullying don’t like having to tell falsehoods. In fact, they hate it!

But they do out of fear and terror. Victims of bullying lie because they feel they must just to survive. ‘You see? A person under the threat of being harmed will do anything to remove that threat. And if they have to lie to save themselves, they’ll do it.

Lying becomes a way to survive.

Many targets of bullying must tell lie after lie just to survive! Why? Because they know that the truth could get them hurt.

Also, victims of bullying lie because they think it will make the bullying stop. Sadly, lying becomes a survival method. Even worse, it grows into a terrible habit that’s hard to break.

I must confess that during the years I was bullied, I felt I had to lie to ensure my personal safety. And it sucked!

As a result, many of my relationships suffered. After years of suffering bullying, I became a very sneaky and wily person. In other words, I used cunning and craftiness to get through school.

I felt I had to use trickery and con games just to survive each school day. And I’m not proud of it.

Bullying Survival Mode:

If you feel you must lie to someone, that person has power over you.

If there’s one thing you should remember, it’s this. The people you you must lie to have power over you. They control your life. In other words, by lying, you make yourself a subject to others.

Here’s another thing you should remember.

People can tell when they’re being played. And lies have a way of unraveling. Falsehoods are also hard to maintain. And you must tell another lie to cover up the first one. In other words, it’s a lot of work to keep up a lie.

If this describes you, you must ask yourself these questions.

“Who are these people that I should have to lie?”
“Why must I work so hard to hide stuff instead of being myself and being free?”
“Who do I have anything to hide from?”
“Why should I give up my power to people who have no business having it?”

Isn’t time you got sick of all the bullshit? Isn’t it time you just said, “Screw it?”

Lying is Stressful!

Lying is too much work and it’s stressful too. And I’m just too lazy to do it.

Moreover, I’m glad I have the confidence to be honest without feeling a need to apologize for it. I know that I have nothing to hide from anyone. And that means I have nothing to lie about.

If others can’t handle my reality, then screw them! They don’t pay my bills, nor do they sign my paychecks. They have no bearing on my life whatsoever.

And even if they did, I still wouldn’t feel the need to lie to them about anything.

Being myself and standing in my truth allow me to relax and live in peace and harmony. I don’t have to scramble to cover up any lies. This is the life I love and want to continue to live.

Bullying Survival Mode:

Why Bullies Lie

Bullies and abusers are notorious liars. And they do it without even a shred of conscience. Bullies lie for reasons of vanity. Also, they lie to insulate themselves from accountability.

However, the scary thing about it is that they’re good at lying. In fact, their talent for telling such convincing falsehoods is what makes them so dangerous.

And why not, bullies and abusers have been telling fibs all their lives.

They’ve had years of practice. In fact, they’ve been doing it for so long that they’ve gotten down to a fine art. In short, bullies have become masters at deception!

Bullies don’t only lie to cover their butts and conceal wrongdoings, imperfections, and shortcomings. They also do it to discredit their victims, defame others, and destroy people’s reputations.

2. Bullying Survival Mode:

You Bully Other Victims

Bullying hurts. It’s not the physical beatings in the locker room nor having your books knocked out of your arms. It’s not the name-calling nor the threats. Nor is it the cruel jokes or pranks in the company break room.

It’s the cumulative sum of all factors

It leaves you feeling you’ve lost all control over your life. It seems you no longer have any say in what happens to you. It’s the feeling of having power over nothing!

In an attempt to snatch back control over something, you soon begin to bully those who are even more vulnerable than you are.

Through your own victimization, you learn that, to keep from feeling powerless, you must bully too. Therefore, in bullying you, bullies unwittingly teach you how to bully.

Victims who also bully others are called bully-victims. In other words, they’re people who are both bullies and victims of other bullies.

Fighting to stay off the bottom.

So, you bully other victims to feel better about yourself. Also, you do it to ascend a few rungs up the social ladder.

Nobody wants to be on the bottom. Everybody wants to be better than somebody. It’s a sad part of human nature.

Just as people fight like hell to stay on top, others fight just as hard to stay off the bottom. Why? Because shit rolls downhill and lands at the bottom.

Person A at the top bullies Person B, who is second from the top.
Person B then bullies Person C, and so on.

And down the pecking order, the nastiness rolls until it lands on Person Z at the bottom. Then, everyone bullies Person Z because they’re defenseless!

The last person doesn’t bully because they’re the one with the least power of all the others. In fact, anyone on the bottom is going to catch hell because they’re powerless.

Moreover, that person will likely be kept on the bottom because no one wants that position. Therefore, everyone keeps Z down to ensure that none of them ever take their place.
That’s how it works!

Bullying Survival Mode:

You bully to stay off the bottom.

As long as someone else is on the bottom, it keeps you and everyone else safe from being there. It’s why bully-victims get bullied by pure bullies, then go on to select their own victims to degrade and humiliate.

However, most of the time, this doesn’t turn out good. Why? Because sometimes, bully-victims become worse off then pure bullies or pure victims.

Pure bullies are people who don’t get bullied by other people. On the other hand, bully-victims are both bullies and victims of bullying by other bullies.

Moreover, they bully far more than pure bullies do because they have more to prove. Bully-victims are far more hated and ostracized than pure bullies or pure victims.

Therefore, they’re lonelier and have few friends or none at all.

3. You resort to trickery.

If you’re a pure victim or bully-victim, you often resort to trickery and deceit. Many bully-victims are pathological liars, cheats, fakes, and sneaks. They believe that humans are the lowest forms of life on earth. Bully-victims tend to be Machiavellian.

However, understand that these people need help. They need someone to get it through their heads that just because people are bullying them doesn’t make it okay to turn around and bully someone else.

So, tell them lovingly and with patience. Why? Because they’re hurting inside and they need someone to listen to them.

They need gentle guidance in the right direction.

4. Bullying Survival Mode:

Making poor choices just to be accepted.

Sadly, targets of bullying often make poor life choices. Years ago, I made some really bad decisions.

At the time, I didn’t really know why. However, today, there is no doubt in my mind that the reason I allowed myself to get into smoking marijuana and having sex during high school was that I was lonely from being bullied.

You see? When you’ve been bullied for so many years, you’ll do anything to be accepted. After so long, the loneliness, the despair, and the sadness becomes too much to bear. Then, desperation begins to creep in.

The bad choices you make include promiscuity and joining gangs. You may also get into drinking, drugs, and hard partying.

Moreover, you may participate in crime and commit high-risk behaviors, such as drag-racing and daredevil stunts.

Moreover you will sometimes do these things just to feel like you belong.

5. Dating Down.

You may also may begin “dating down”. You’ll settle for a partner you don’t really love. Or, you pick one who’s abusive.

Why? Because you need proof that you’re desirable. Moreover, you want to prove to everyone else that you can find a partner just like they can.

Bullied girls may also deliberately become pregnant because they want so badly to have someone (the baby) to love them.

If you are a target of bullying, I can’t emphasize enough that you don’t have to do these things to feel loved. There are better options.

And if the bullying is unbearable, find a way to get out of the environment and go somewhere you can be safe.

Instead of making unwise choices, practice your talents, and do the things you enjoy. Spend time with the people who DO love you.

Give a little of yourself to help others every day and I promise you, it will pay off sooner or later.

Know that there will come a day when you attract genuine friends into your life. Believe it with every fiber of your being!

This post is all about Bullying Survival and what not to do When you’re being bullied so that you don’t risk making your life worse.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. School Choice: Why it’s a Godsend for Bullied Kids!

2. Effects of Bullying on the Victim: 13 Symptoms of Bullied People

bullying and psychological effects in children

Bullying and Psychological Effects: 11 Emotions Victims Feel

May 19, 2025July 21, 20254 Comments

‘Want to know all the bullying and psychological effects? Here are all the emotions that come with being a victim of bullying.

Bullying and psychological effects are closely related. Targets go through so many raw emotions. They go from anger, to sadness, to hopelessness and so much more.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all the emotions victims feel so that you can know what you’re feeling and know when to get help.

Once you learn all about this important information, you will be able to better take care of yourself.

This post is all about bullying and psychological effects so that you can show yourself compassion and get profession help when you need it.

Bullying and Psychological Effects

If you’re a victim of bullying, here are all the emotions you’ll likely feel so that you can understand what you’re feeling and why. Self-knowledge is one of the steps to overcoming bullying.

Emotions Victims of Bullying Feel

Targets of bullying endure a hell that no one can comprehend. Unless they have experienced bullying, others won’t understand what it does.

It’s the same with the range of resulting emotions they feel. Unless you’ve been there, you can’t imagine the intense stress and the wide array of powerful emotions that come with it. The psychological effects cannot be underestimated!

1. Grief

Once bullies select you as their object of bullying, life as you know it changes. You mourn for the way your life used to be and long to get things back to the way they were.

You also grieve the loss of the dignity and respect you once had. Moreover, you mourn the loss of your reputation and good standing. In fact, you’ve lost your entire identity.

You grieve for your friends and in some cases, your spouse and family. There’s nothing worse than to endure grief over a loved one who’s still alive.

2. Bullying and Psychological Effects:

Bewilderment

You don’t understand why this is happening to you. You can’t fathom why people are bullying you because you know you’ve done nothing to deserve it.

You’re shocked that people you love and who you thought loved you have turned against you. You’re also at a loss as to what you did to bring about such hatred.

In your heart, you know that you’re a great person. You’re fully aware of the good you bring to this world.

3. Bullying and Psychological Effects:

Confusion

You don’t know which way to turn. Who do you turn to? How do you remedy the situation? Each time you do something to make things better, the bullying only intensifies. Therefore, you feel stuck!

4. Terror

Anytime you’re targeted, the fear can be paralyzing. You’re afraid to speak but afraid not to speak.

Moreover, you’re frightened of the people around you. You’re scared to make any moves or decisions. Why? Because you know that people will scrutinize anything you do.

They’ll only see it in a negative light. You’re afraid to come to school or work because you know what’s waiting for you when you get there.

You know that none of it is just your imagination. They’re all out to get you and if you show up, they’ll only blindside you with another bullying attack.

5. Sadness

You cry in your car to and from your school or your job. You cry in your pillow at night when you go to bed.

It seems that no one will give you a chance. Therefore, you’re isolated and alone. When you try to make new friends, the bullies always seem to intervene.

They turn the new people against you too. The type of sadness you feel is the kind that is deep, dark, and overwhelming.

6. Bullying and Psychological Effects:

Depression

Depression is the lowest point bullying can drive you to. Why? Because it comes from feelings of powerlessness. When you think that you have power over nothing, it’s as if your life has been set to autopilot.

Therefore, you feel like a leaf being blown around in the wind. This is the epitome of hell on earth. Why? Because it seems that there’s nothing you can do to change the situation. It’s the feeling of being bound and gagged.

Bullying makes you feel trapped like a rat. And there’s nowhere to go where the bullies won’t find you. Therefore, it seems that things will never get better.

When you’re depressed, you don’t fight back because you’re exhausted from all the bullying you’ve endured. Therefore, you resign yourself after so long.

After bullying has knocked you on your ass enough times, you want to give up. However, it’s not that you want to quit, you only want a break from the bullying.

Moreover, you want to feel some semblance of peace. You want to rest because you’re so damn tired!

7. Exhaustion.

Therefore, you lose the will to fight.

This is why bullies love picking on the depressed because they’re least likely to push back. Understand that when you’re depressed, they’ve already diminished you. Therefore, the bullies don’t have to work so hard to bring you down.

They’ve already accomplished that mission. Therefore, all the bullies have to do is keep you down. After all, it’s much easier to keep someone on their knees than it is to bring them to their knees.

In other words, it’s always easier to maintain something than it is to change it.

If this describes you, don’t lose hope! Know that things will get better and you will heal. You many need lots of therapy, but you can regain their confidence and feel good again.

Moreover, you can take your life back.

It won’t be easy. In fact, it will be hard, even exhausting at times, but will be worth it later. If you are battling depression brought about by bullying, or anything else, know that there are people who care. You are not alone and it’s okay to not be okay.

8. Bullying and Psychological Effects:

Rage

This is, by far, THE most powerful emotion you can have. With each physical or psychological attack, the fury grows.

Therefore, it festers until you just want to rip the bullies’ heads off and shove them up their butts. Oh, yes! Rage does that to you. It gives you such evil thoughts!

If you aren’t careful, the bullying can make you feel homicidal! In other words, you’ll loathe your bullies so intensely that you’ll just want them all to drop dead.

But please! Use your brain. Don’t allow yourself to snap and take any lives. Instead, think about your future. Moreover, think about the consequences you’d face.

The bullying you suffer will only last for a little while. Therefore, your bullies aren’t worth you ruining your future.

Also, they’re not worth the pain you’d cause the people who love you. Rest assured that, eventually, a door will open for you. And you will be able to transfer to a new school or job where things will be so much better.

9. Suicidal thoughts

It’s not that you want to die. You just want the torment to stop. Therefore, when the torture reaches a certain level, death seems to be the only escape.

These thoughts happen when you feel you’ve exhausted every possible option to make things better. However, don’t give up.

As long as you’re alive, there’s always a good chance that things will change. If you hang tough, things will get better and you’ll come out victorious on the other side of it.

I want you to know that if you suffer bullying, things may seem hopeless but they aren’t. Things are going to change for the better. And it will happen when you least expect them to.

10. Bullying and Psychological Effects:

shame

Bullying comes with a high level of shame. Bullies can ritually torment you to the point that you may begin viewing yourself through their eyes.

Toxic shame is, perhaps, the worst effect of bullying. Why? Because once you begin seeing yourself through the eyes of your abusers, that’s when you know you’ve hit rock bottom.

Your abusers’ contempt, disgust, and aversion toward you have rubbed off on you. Therefore, you began to hate yourself.

But I want you to understand that this is what your bullies want. They want you to hate yourself. Because the bullies know that once they finally get you to hate yourself, they’ve won.

Your bullies aren’t dimwitted. They know that you’ll submit to the abuse because when a person hates themselves, they think they deserve abuse.

When a target of bullying suffers from toxic shame, they accuse themselves of sins of which they aren’t guilty. They apologize incessantly over things that aren’t their fault. Ultimately, targets feel guilty for merely existing!

There, you must fight like the devil to keep your self-esteem and confidence. Educate yourself on the psychology of bullies and bullying. Then, you will have the knowledge to empower yourself.

11. You Grow Numb to the bullying

Some people endure bullying and gaslighting for so long they seem to grow accustomed to it. Therefore, they become emotionally numb.

This is one of the most heartbreaking effects of bullying. When the bullying has gone on for so long that the attacks don’t even hurt anymore. You may think you’ve finally toughened up.

However, here’s what’s really happening here. You’ve gotten so used to the torment that the more subtle attacks no longer sound cruel.

Now, some people think that targets are better off when they no longer realize they’re being bullied. But are they really?

In some instances, yes, and in others, no. If you don’t react because you don’t know to, some bullies will get bored with the lack of response and leave you alone.

But others will only bully you worse.

Either way, there comes a point when the target just says, “F it!” and doesn’t care anymore. To survive and keep your sanity, sometimes it becomes a necessity not to give a damn until you can find a way out.

The effects of bullying are no joke, and you shouldn’t take them lightly. So, be aware of your bullies’ mind games.

I can’t stress this enough! Things may seem utterly hopeless now, but it won’t always be this way. This is the time to dig in your heels and fight to maintain your self-esteem. Whatever you do, don’t give up!

Look to the future because you never know what tomorrow will bring! Things eventually improved for me. And they will for you, too.

You will likely need to leave the environment and move somewhere where you can start anew and reinvent yourself. But know that one day, you’ll finally live in peace.

This post was all about bullying and psychological effects so that you’ll recognize them and do what you must to keep your sanity and heal from bullying.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Effects of Bullying on the Victim: 13 Symptoms of Bullied People

2. The Effects of Bullying: 17 Negative Results on Victims

3. Psychological Effects of Gaslighting: 11 Ways it Impacts Victims

Imbalance of Power in Bullying: 3 Sources of Power for Bullies

May 16, 2025May 27, 20253 Comments

‘Want to know all about the imbalance of power in bullying? Here are all the sources bullies draw their power from.

Too many victims of bullying don’t know what to do to reclaim their power. They’re at a loss as to where to start.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about the imbalance of power in bullying. You’ll also learn exactly what it is that unfairly tips the scales of power in your bullies’ favor.

Once you learn all about this life-changing information, you will be able to take back your personal favor and tip the scales back in your favor.

This post is all about the imbalance of power in bullying so that you know where it comes from and you can finally take back control of your life.

Imbalance of Power in Bullying

As most of you know, bullying arises from an imbalance of power. In other words, the bullies have way more power than you do. This is why they selected you as their victim.

However, exactly what is it that determines this power imbalance? Here are 5 sources your bullies get their power from.

1. A Bully’s Power is Your Lack of Knowledge.

You’ve heard people say that knowledge is power. And they’re right. Knowledge is power. Having knowledge is the first step in problem-solving.

Your bullies get their power because you simply don’t know the power you have. To know your power, you must also have knowledge of your goodness, your strengths, and your rights as a human being.

Power you don’t know you have is power you don’t have. In other words, if you don’t know your power, you might as well not have it.

Here’s exactly what you need to know.

You must have self-knowledge. This means not only knowing your power, but also your worth! Furthermore, you must also know your potential and the good things you’re capable of.

You must believe in yourself. And you must realize that you deserve love and respect just as much as the next person

You must know all about human predators. This means knowing all about bullying and how bullies operate. Therefore, have knowledge of he nature, mindset, and tactics of bullies.

In short, you must have self-knowledge and know your enemies. Once you do, their moves and power plays will no longer have any effect on you.

Again, your lack of self-knowledge and that of your bullies is where they draw their power over you. This is why many victims of bullying beg for approval.

However, when you seek approval from others, you only hand over more of your power. There’s a name for this. It’s called, “simping.”

Imbalance of Power in Bullying:

When You Simp, You Only Hand Over Your Power.

Many targets beg for approval, attention, and popularity. And the sad thing is that most don’t realize they’re doing it.

As a result, you’ll only get bullied worse. Also, people lose respect for you. Even bystanders will mistreat you too. And it’ll be because you don’t respect yourself.

Understand that if you don’t respect yourself, no one else will respect you either.

Therefore, you must respect yourself and do it in the early stages of bullying. Because once the bullying has gone on for so long, it will be too late.

And the way to self-respect is to have knowledge of your value and your power. Also, setting boundaries is a way to respect yourself. Know your worth and you will know your power!

And once you do, you will be able to defuse bullying like a champ.

2. Naivete.

Naivete and lack of knowledge are closely related. However, the latter comes more from lack of life experiences.

We all have been naïve at some point in our lives. But over time, we grew and accumulated knowledge. This knowledge came from lessons learned from good and bad life experiences.

This is how wisdom is acquired. Some people become sage quicker and others slower. What counts is that we eventually learn. It doesn’t matter the pace.

However, some people take years to learn. Not that this is necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes, the learning process takes longer due to the environment you’re stuck in.

Maybe you live in a sheltered home. Maybe you have a secure family and home life. Therefore, you believe that all people have goodness in them.

Again, this is not a bad thing. However, it can mark you for bullying and abuse. It can set you up for someone to take advantage of you.

Imbalance of Power in Bullying:

Bullies Can Smell Naivete A Mile Away.

It’s what helps them choose their victims. Any time you’re a target of bullying, you can’t afford to be naïve. Moreover, the sad reality is that most people targeted for bullying are.

And it’s why their bullies selected them in the first place.

When I was young, I was not very smart when it came to people. I believed that all people were inherently good, and I believed it to a fault. I can admit that today.

Therefore, the bullying I suffered years ago wised me up when it came to the duality of human beings.

Most victims hold the same belief. They believe that all people are inherently good. They cannot fathom how anyone could deliberately harm another person without a darn good reason.

In other words, they were raised to believe that things will work out for the best. This is not to say that we shouldn’t think positively.

However, many fail to take into consideration that the world is full of bad people with evil intentions. Also, we live in a competitive world.

And there are people who want to take what we have. There are people who want to hurt us. Failure to realize these harsh truths will only subject targets of bullying to years of abuse.

You must learn to spot bullies before they strike.

Bullies, especially those in power, will always win unless you learn to spot them ahead of time. Moreover, you must learn strategies to counter their attacks.

You can only learn to counter them when you accept the truth that bad people exist in the world.

You must realize that once bullies have their sights set on you, they won’t just disappear. Bullies are very persistent with their goals to harm you and ultimately destroy you.

This is hard to swallow because we all want to believe that all humans are good. However, the fact is that many of them are monsters. Not everyone believes in treating others as they would like to be treated.

When you’re naïve, you’re vulnerable. Why? Because without people-knowledge, you’ll continue to take abuse. Therefore, you must gain knowledge of the bully mindset. And you must learn the motivations and intentions behind each tactic bullies use.

Only then will you be able to protect yourself and keep them away.

3. Imbalance of Power in Bullying:

Bullies also get their power from Your Predictability.

Being predictable is dangerous. Why? Because if bullies can predict your next move, it’s game over.

Remember that most bullies are socially intelligent. They can spot behavior patterns in their victims.

All they have to do is carefully observe you. They look for any patterns of behavior, habits, and weaknesses. Your bullies closely monitor your reactions to everything. They notice what ticks you off, what makes you happy, and what excites you.

Moreover, they study your body language to suss out your moods and emotional state. And when they watch you, bullies leave no stone unturned.

They even scrutinize the way you do things. For example, the way you arrange objects.

Bullies are like bank robbers who case out a bank before pulling off the heist. The robbers get the bank’s layout and search for any vulnerabilities in the security system. Also, they look for any patterns of patrols and the comings and goings there.

Is it any wonder that being targeted for bullying can feel like being under a microscope? Like you’re being watched? It’s because you are!

It’s always best to be unpredictable.

Being too predictable is unwise, especially if a pack of bullies are on your tail. Instead, make it a point to be unpredictable. In other words, do things as randomly as possible.

I know it won’t be easy because we’re all creatures of habit. However, if you do things people don’t expect, you won’t be so easy to figure out.

Therefore, it’s best to be versatile.

If you’re a target of bullying, you want to make it look you have no clear strategy. You must scramble your behavior patterns and your reactions.

This will confuse the bullies and force them to back off. In fact, it’ll scare the hell out of them!

Again, by doing something unexpected, you gain a huge advantage over your bullies. Therefore, when bullies can’t figure out what you’re going to do, it scares them to death.

As a result, they’ll either leave you alone or react out of fear!

Nothing is more frightening than when you make a move nobody would ever expect. It’s the reason natural disasters are so scary because no one knows when and where they’ll hit next.

Moreover, it’s why deer hunters can track down their prey and kill them. They know the habits and behavior patterns of the deer they hunt.

Understand that habits and patterns are the worst things for you. Bullies pick up on your routines and use them against you.

Imbalance of Power in Bullying:

In closing

you must learn to unsettle your bullies by allowing them to see you do things they’d never expect. If a bully launches an attack, you should counter-attack suddenly.

The attack should come without warning. You should hit them in a way they wouldn’t expect, and when they least expect it.

You must purposefully mislead your bullies to trick them into an emotional reaction!

If you’re going to be predictable, don’t stay that way. Do it for long enough that your bullies get used to your patterns.

What you want is to lull them into a false sense of security. Then, you can strike suddenly with something unexpected! And that’s how you get them to leave you alone!

You can find many more ways to reclaim your power here.

This post is all about the imbalance of power in bullying so that you’ll know all the sources your bullies draw their power from. Moreover, with this knowledge, you’ll be able to counter bullying much more effectively.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. False Sense of Power: Real Power versus the Fake Power of Bullying

2. Lack of Boundaries: 15 Signs You Need to Get Some

what does victim blaming look like reddit

What Does Victim Blaming Look Like? 9 Easy Signs to Watch for

April 2, 2025April 2, 20252 Comments

What does victim blaming look like? ‘Want to know exactly how to recognize when you’re being blamed for the bullying you suffer. Here are all the signs you need to know about.

Victim blaming is ugly in that it re-victimizes victims, over and over again.

Therefore, in this post is all the answers to the question, “What does victim blaming look like,” so that you can know how to recognize it when you see it and how to defend yourself against victim blaming behavior it when a bully tries it with you.

Once you learn to see it when it happens, you will better be able to call it out when it happens to you or anyone else.

This post answers the question, “What does victim blaming look like,” so that you can see victim blaming for what it is and tackle it immediately.

What does victim blaming look like?

Many times, when you call out or report bullying, your bullies will blame you for their despicable behavior just to take the guilt off themselves.

So, what is the definition of victim blaming?

According to Welsh Women’s Aid, “Victim blaming is any response that explicitly states or implies that the victim is to blame for the abuse they have experienced.”

In cases of bullying, Targets Never Become Targets Overnight

Victim blaming doesn’t only happen to victims of bullying, it can also happen to victims of crimes, such as rape and domestic assault. Moreover, the blame can come from the perpetrators, other people, or even law enforcement, who is supposed to help victims.

The same happens to victims of bullying as well. Bullies are notorious for blaming their victims for their atrocious abuse. However, blame can also come from peers, teachers, coworkers, supervisors and managers.

This happens especially when the bullying of a certain individual first begins. Therefore, if you’re beginning to see subtle signs of bullying by others, be very careful. Why?

Because, any time bullies select a potential target, they start out subtle and sweet with their bullying. The reason bullies are subtle at first is because they’re testing the waters. In other words, they’re probing you to see how you respond and if you’re an easy target.

If you overlook their behavior, or response too emotionally, your bullies will slowly move on to more obvious verbal abuse. However, if you respond the right way by being assertive and telling them in no uncertain terms to stop the behavior, they will leave you alone. Keep in mind that this only works in the early stages of bullying.

And sadly, most people don’t stand up for themselves in the early stages. Therefore, again, bullies progress to more blatant verbal abuse.

Your bullies may try to blame you. However, continue to stand strong. Don’t back down and refuse to accept blame. Then, eventually, they’ll leave you alone.

What Does Victim Blaming Look Like?

1. Bullies Ridicule You and tell you to “Get Over It.”

Bullies will ridicule you for the way you feel about their abuse. Moreover, they taunt you if you have the guts to call them out on it. But see them for who they are.

“Get over it!”
“Let it go!”
“Forget about it!”

Whatever way they say it, it usually means the same.

Realize that bullies are self-entitled turds who think you should just let them ride roughshod over you. Also, they believe that you’re wrong for even trying to defend against the abuse.

Maybe they know they’re in the wrong but don’t want you to notice it.

How many of you have been told to do either of these? As if you could just wiggle your nose and everything is peachy king. When you’ve been abused, you cannot just let it go. Healing takes time.

The emotions you feel won’t just go away. Even if you paint a smile on your face and pretend that nothing’s wrong, these feelings will still be there.

They’ll only simmer under the surface. Moreover, the more you try to stuff them down and bury them, the more damage it will cause.

Don’t feel guilty for feeling the way that you do.

Understand that the emotions you’re feeling are there for a reason. They warn you that something isn’t right. Realize that the anger and hurt won’t disappear overnight.

Know that the people who give you that kind of response do so out of ignorance and entitlement. Moreover, they only re-abuse you when they demand that you “get over it.”

In order to heal and get your life back again, you must allow yourself to feel those raw emotions. No, it isn’t comfortable. No one wants to feel pain.

However, you must go through it to come out on the other side of it. And while you’re moving through the pain, practice self-care.

Give yourself some TLC. Have self-compassion. It’s okay to not be okay and it’s okay to baby yourself.

Take a few days off. Lounge around the house in your pajamas if you want to. Eat your favorite treat or give yourself a good, sweaty workout.

Also, treat yourself to a spa-day, facial, new do, or a beach vacation. Your first priority is self-care, whatever that may be.

Last and most importantly, don’t shut up! Tell your bullies to take a long walk off a short pier.

Also, keep speaking out and standing in your truth. Self-care also means being your own advocate and if people don’t like it, too bad.

Put yourself first!

2. What does victim blaming look like?

Shifting focus from your bullies’ actions to your reactions.

This is a classic bully-move. Anytime you call attention to their disgusting behavior, your bullies try to distract others’ attention to the way you reacted to it.

Your bullies do this for three reasons.

To silence you.
To make you ashamed of defending yourself.
Also, to make you doubt your own judgement.
To discredit you.

Bullying thrives on secrecy. Therefore, bullies point out your reaction, hoping that you’ll shut your mouth. Therefore, keep talking.

3. Questioning the victim’s reactions.

Many times, when you defend yourself against bullying, people will question your reaction. They may ask, “Why didn’t you walk away when the bully hit you? You didn’t have to sink to their level by hitting them back.

However, bullies don’t honor someone who walks away. People may tell you to be the bigger person and walk away from the bully. But how do you know that your bully won’t sucker punch you the moment you turn your back?

Realize that bullies only understand strength. Therefore, strength is what you respond with. Punch their lights out!

You have to let them know that if they lay hands on you, there will be consequences.

4. What does victim blaming look like?

Bringing attention to the victim’s flaws and weaknesses.

Your bullies may say that your weight or your big ears are the reason you get bullied. They may make remarks such as, “Maybe if you weren’t such an oinker, no one would mess with you.”

Be that as it may, no one has the right to bully you. Ever!

Therefore, don’t fall that bullshit. Continue to stand your ground!

5. Trivializing the victim’s pain.

“It’s not that bad.” “Aw! It’s not the end of the world.” How many gave you one of these responses when you reported bullying and abuse or spoke out about it?

Understand that bullies say these things to trivialize your pain.

Therefore, don’t fall for that garbage! Your bullies aren’t the ones on the receiving end of the abuse. You are!

Again, don’t let them gaslight you! Keep standing up for yourself.

6. Removing the bully’s name.

For instance, instead of saying, “Billy beat Kelly up,” bystanders will say, “Kelly got beat up!”

Many times, the bully’s friends and followers will do this to protect their friend. Therefore, they cover for their buddy while taunting you because Billy beat the crap out of you.

7. What does victim blaming look like?

Suggesting that you had it coming.

Lots of times, when bullies abuse you, they’ll tell you that you had it coming. They may say that you made them do it.

They’ll make statements, such as,

“You ‘made me‘ or ‘make me’ hit you!”
“You ‘make‘ people want to hurt you!”
“Don’t ‘make me‘ hurt you!”
“Don’t ‘make me‘ mad!”

However, you must see all this for what it is. It’s all a way for your bullies to blame you and take the guilt off themselves.

Think about this. If they can make you take the blame for their abuse, then they get off Scot free. Moreover, they can make themselves look like the innocent victims while making you look like the bully.

8. Implying that you must have provoked the bully.

For example, if you’re bullied at school and you report it to the principal. The principal then asks you, “What did you do to make that boy attack you?”

Sadly, school staff tend to take the bully’s side and blame the victim.

9. Asking you what you could’ve done to avoid being bullied.

School staff and workplace managers are also guilty of this. In many cases, they ask you, “What do you think you could’ve done to prevent John from cursing you out?”

If nothing else, understand this right now! When they ask you questions like these, they’re trying to put if off on you. Don’t let them do it!

Call them out on it! Let them know that you see through it and you won’t accept blame for anyone else’s deplorable behavior but your own! And when you say it, mean it!

This post addressed the question, “what does victim blaming look like,” So you’ll recognize it when it happens and defend yourself against it.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Stop Victim Blaming: 8 Reasons People Blame Targets for Bullying

2. Signs Someone is Gaslighting You: The 13 Must-Know Symptoms

3. Gaslighting Phrases: 7 Most Common Statements to Be Aware of

4. Phrases to Shut Down a Gaslighter: 9 Powerful Statements to Use

Negative Self-Fulfilling Prophecy: 9 Ways it Plagues Victims of Bullying

March 14, 2025June 24, 20252 Comments

‘Want to know what a negative self-fulfilling prophecy is and how victims of bullying unwittingly bring it about? ‘Want to know how you can change your way of thinking so that this bad phenomenon doesn’t happen to you? Here’s how it happens and how you can turn it around so that it doesn’t keep happening to you.

When you’ve been a target of bullying for so long, your world becomes shaky. You began to doubt yourself and your abilities. Why? Because bullies and others had drummed into your head for so long and you can’t do anything right. Moreover, they’ve successfully made you believe that you aren’t good enough and never will be.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn about the negative self-fulfilling prophecy so that you’ll be compelled to change your negative thought patterns and begin thinking only positive thoughts.

Once you learn all about these secrets, you will work on having a positive mind. As a result, you will be better able to put your life in the direction of success.

This post is all about the negative self-fulfilling prophecy and how you can turn a negative attitude into a positive one.

Negative self-fulfilling prophecy

After bullies and others have put you down and degraded you for so long, serious changes in your thought patterns begin happening. You begin having symptoms that should warn you that you’re on your way to having a “bullied brain.”

Here are those symptoms.

1. You start to wonder if they’re right about you.

Moreover, you wonder if they were all along and that you just didn’t see it. If you aren’t careful, bullies will tell you lies about yourself so often, for so long, that you’ll begin to believe it too.

Why? Because a huge piece of your self-esteem has broken off. Therefore, your brain is rewiring itself to accept what these creeps tell you as gospel.

You may think to yourself, “Well, everyone else thinks I’m no good, maybe they’re right. Because if there is any good in me, why would so many people tell me differently?”

You think you’re using logic when thinking this. But you aren’t. What you’re doing is buying into the lies bullies have told you. Moreover, you’re mistakenly thinking that because the bullies have managed to convince everyone else that you’re no good, that it must be true.

It isn’t. Just because everyone else thinks you’re garbage does NOT make it true. Therefore, you must never fall for your bullies’ lies. Because, that what they are! LIES!

Again, just because everyone else thinks you’re trash doesn’t make it so. Moreover, this is what you must tell yourself every day, several times a day if you have to.

Never let your bullies get into your head. They may turn everyone else against you, but you don’t have to let them turn you against you.

Instead, hold on tightly to your worth and your confidence, no matter what!

2. Negative self-fulfilling prophecy:

You begin to get awkward and clumsy.

Let’s face it. When people bully you nonstop, you’re likely to turn into a bundle of nerves. Therefore, it is out of nervousness that you become clumsy and awkward.

This is because your brain is preparing itself for a hostile environment. Realize that this is a survival mechanism. The bullying has thrown not only your mind but your entire body into survival mode.

Therefore, your logical brain has shut down and your primal, survival brain has taken over. Therefore, you will begin to do things you normally wouldn’t do. When you’re in survival mode, you’ll make a ton of mistakes.

Your decision making takes a big hit. Any decision you make, you wonder if it’s the right one. You may have even become too afraid to make choices.

Therefore, you begin fumbling and screwing up constantly. Moreover, it seems that the harder you try not to make mistakes, the more of them you make. And it feels as if you don’t know which end is up anymore.

As a result, the more bullies ridicule, put you down, even hurt you for those mistakes. And there goes another piece of self-esteem.

3. You begin to make a ton of gaffes and blunders.

This also comes from nervousness.

As you continue to descend down this downward spiral, you unintentionally make gaffes that only make people angrier at you. You only rub them the wrong way when you’re only trying to quell the hostility.

Therefore, it seems that anything you try to do to help the situation only seems to have the opposite effect. This erodes even more of your precious self-esteem.

4. Negative self-fulfilling prophecy:

You then begin to have a horrible attitude and outlook on life.

You then begin to lose faith in humanity. Moreover, you have thoughts such as:

All humans are mean-spirited, greedy, and selfish pieces of sh**.
The world is a crappy place.
I’ll never amount to anything.
Life sucks.

5. Adverse things then begin happening in your life.

Adverse things begin to happen in your life. Your grades drop, your performance starts to wane, and you lose out on awards, achievements, and opportunities.

Moreover, all the while, your bullies are watching and smiling. Why? Because all that is happening to you is confirming to them that you really are “a loser.”

Even worse is that you know, deep down inside, what they’re thinking. Bam! More of your self-esteem is smashed to bits.

6. What relationships you have left begin to suffer.

The people in your life don’t understand what is happening to you. Therefore, they begin to question you. Some may accuse you of having a bad attitude. Also, some may accuse you of being stubborn or defiant when you’re really shutting down.

Therefore they become disappointed in you and eventually stop believing in you.

7. Negative Self-Fulfilling Prophecy:

Goals that were once easy to attain seem to become unreachable.

Schoolwork or work projects that were once easy for you suddenly become difficult. This is because you’re in survival mode. In other words, you’re too busy looking over your shoulder and trying to survive bullying to learn anything or concentrate on work projects.

After all, your brain can only do so much at once. Again, you learn and concentrate on work using your logical brain. Therefore, when the survival part of your brain turns on, the part involved in learning and concentration shuts down.

8. You become exhausted.

Living in survival mode wipes you out after so long. You become both mentally and physically tire and fatigued.

Sadly, others may accuse you of being lazy when you’re actually exhausted.

9. learned helplessness.

Finally, you stop trying at anything. Period. Your bullied and everyone else have convinced you that you’re doomed to fail and live in misery. Therefore, you unintentionally live up to their expectations.

Do you see where I’m going with this? It’s only the Law of Attraction at work. It starts with negative thought patterns. Like attracts like. What you think about, even on a subconscious level, always comes about.

However, know that it isn’t your fault. So, don’t blame yourself.

People consistently bombard you with negativity and every kind of abuse. And they’ve done it repetitiously.

In fact, they’ve already convinced everyone else that you’re evil, worthless, and foolish. However, it seems they’re breaking their backs, trying their damnedest to convince you of it too.

Negative self-fulfilling prophecy:

Still, You must take responsibility for your own well-being!

Because, every day, you hear the same vitriol and get the same abuse over and over. Again. Repetition, repetition, repetition.

However, this doesn’t relieve you of your responsibility to yourself.

You must train your brain to re-frame everything these creeps say and do. Moreover, you must train your brain to see through their behavior and see the intentions behind it.

And you must do it fast!

Otherwise, you’ll only start believing the crap that your bullies feed you. Then, you’ll to live up to it. Moreover, you’ll have a hard time controlling it or stopping it from happening.

See your bullies’ behavior and attempts to condition you. See The Attacks for what they are and what they’re intended to do.

Understand that bullies do all of this deliberately. Oh yes! There is both a method and a purpose behind it that’s either conscious or subconscious.

Put plainer, bullies mean to get you to believe that you are, in fact, worthless. Moreover, they want to force you to agree with it and that you deserve the mistreatment. Why?

Because if they can get you to believe it too, then you’re more likely to submit to their abuse and demands without protest. Moreover, if they can get you to believe you deserve the abuse, then you’re least likely to call them out or hold them accountable.

Therefore, they can continue to abuse you without any inhibitions. And they can do it with impunity.

Negative self-Fulfilling Prophecy:

**Why else would they try to drum such garbage into your head a million and one times a day?**

Understand that bullying, because of its repetitiveness and brutality, is a form of brainwashing. It’s not only physical, but it’s also psychological warfare.

In other words, it is designed to condition you to believe that you’re no good and will never amount to anything.

When you’re in a school or workplace full of bullies who loathe you and want nothing more than to destroy you, the psychology of it is akin to being stuck in a communist re-education camp.

It’s just as mind-altering as it is damaging.

this is because bullies spoon-feed you their bullshit repeatedly until your mind absorbs it and you end up believing it. They physically and emotionally beat you down. Next, they gaslight you and convince you that you deserve it.

In other words, they repeatedly tell you that you asked for the abuse and made them hurt you.

You MADE ME hit you!
You MADE ME mad!
You MADE everybody hate you!

They blame you for their bad behavior when the truth is that you have no control over it. I want you to know this right now!

Negative Self-Fulfilling Prophecy:

You’re Not Responsible for their behavior!

You can’t control anyone else’s behavior. Only they have control over their actions. The only person’s behavior you can control is your own. Always remember that!

Again, start training your brain to resist these gaslighting statements!

Again, if you aren’t careful, this repetition of bullying, abuse, and gaslighting will brainwash you. You’ll internalize it and be convinced of it.

Once your bullies finally convince you that you’re the lowest form of life on Earth, you will adopt a poor attitude and begin behaving in a way that matches your new beliefs about yourself. I know it sounds unbelievable, but it’s true.

I can’t stress this enough!

You’ll stop believing in yourself.
You’ll have a condition known as “Learned Helplessness.”
Your grades will plummet, and your performance will suffer.
You’ll attract all kinds of bad fortune into your life.
You’ll want so badly to get out of the bad environment and situation you’re in that you’ll begin making poor decisions and life choices out of desperation- choices that may alter the entire course of your life.
You may drop out of school to get away from your bullies. I almost did.
You may quit your job before you have time to find other employment.
You may join a gang or extremist group to feel like you belong and to have friends.
You may use drugs to fit in or to dull the pain.

And what’s really sad is that you won’t even realize it’s happening until you’re already too far down the rabbit hole. That is if you ever realize it.

Negative Self-Fulfilling Prophecy:

Bullying will change your life- either for better or worse.

It’s hard! I completely get that. It’s damn hard to keep loving yourself when you’re surrounded by people who hate you.

Moreover, I know how difficult it is to believe in yourself when it seems that no one else does. And I realize that it’s overwhelming to continue trying when everyone else is constantly telling you to give up- that you’ll never make it.

Believe me. I empathize with you because I was there and I almost gave up.

I attempted suicide in the eighth grade and almost didn’t make it.
I almost dropped out of school during the eleventh grade.
I almost lost hope.

I did some desperate things back then- things that could have gotten me arrested or worse- killed!

However, if I’d held on to my love for and belief in myself, there’s no doubt that I would’ve spared myself a lot of pain.

But I eventually got mad- at myself! And when I got mad, I became determined that they weren’t going to destroy the rest of my life. I wasn’t going to let them.

That’s what you have to do- get mad. Get determined. Dig in your heels and double down. Be determined not to lose yourself. Don’t let them destroy the parts of yourself that matter.

Don’t let them take your person-hood!

Because if you give into your bullies and cave into believing what they tell you, it will become a Self-Fulfilling Prophesy. You’ll end up living up to everything they tell you. That’s not what you want.

You don’t want to give your bullies any more satisfaction than they’ve already gotten at your expense. No way!

Negative Self-Fulfilling Prophecy:

Why are they so hell-bent on making you believe their lies?

Because they want to brainwash you.
Bullies want is to break your spirit.
Their end goal is to bring you so low that you never recover.
If they can do the above three, then you’re likely to prove them right.
Know that it’s all an attempt to reprogram you, and in a vast majority of cases, it works!

Self-fulfilling prophesies are real, and they can destroy your life. Therefore, don’t let bullies cause you to have a losing, self-defeating, and bitter attitude.

On the other hand, having confidence, loving yourself, and having a positive attitude will bring good things into your life. It may take a while but be patient! It will happen!

This is not to say that bad things won’t sometimes happen anyway because they do. Sometimes things happen that we have no control over. And it happens to all of us.

However, with a positive attitude, your life won’t be one huge string of bad luck. You will have victories- and more of them than losses.

Attitude does attract things into your life. Like attracts like. How I wish I’d know this when I was young.

This post was all about the negative self-fulfilling prophecy so that you can stop them before they happen by re-training your thought patterns.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. The Bullied Brain: 7 Ways Bullying Effects Mental Health

2. Bullying and Self Confidence: 7 Steps to Keeping Your Confidence Up When People Bully You

3. Your First Line of Defense Against Bullying

4. How to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem

5. How to Overcome Low Self-Esteem: 7 Insanely Easy Ways

Culture of Bullying in Schools: Why Schools Lose Money

March 7, 2025March 7, 20255 Comments

‘Want to know why a culture of bullying in schools causes them to lose money and what you can do if you or your child suffers bullying? Here are all the facts you need to know about and the steps you can take if you’re a parent of a bullied child.

“When bullied children stay home to avoid hurtful relationships, schools lose tens of millions of dollars each year, a study says.” (Education Week)

According to The Atlantic (theatlantic.com) in a 2013 article by Eleanor Barkham, “160,000 kids stay home from school each day to avoid being bullied.” (https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp/.theatlantic.com/amp/article/280201/)

It adds up. Imagine those numbers per week, per month, and school year.
Each state receives federal funding for education.

You will learn all about the culture of bullying in schools and why educational institutions lose money. Moreover, you will learn what they’re doing about it and why you should be concerned. Lastly, you will learn what you can do if you or your child is stuck in a school where bullies run amuck.

Once you learn all of this life-saving information, you will be prompted to take steps to get yourself or your child out of a toxic learning environment. Then, you will select a school where you or your kid can learn in peace and flourish.

This post is all about the culture of bullying in schools and why they lose money. It’s also about what these schools are doing about it and why you should be concerned. Lastly, it’s about the importance of transferring your child to a safer school so that they can learn in a safe environment.

Culture of Bullying In Schools

The federal government funds the states, then each state funds each of its schools a specific dollar amount per day, per child in attendance. Therefore, when a student is absent from class on any given day, the school loses money for that particular student that day.

Many schools choose to sweep incidences of bullying under the rug. Moreover, it’s the victims who others label the troublemakers. In other words, they blame the incident victim of bullying for the abuse they suffer. Even worse people punish the target while letting the bullies off the hook.

This only encourages the bullies to bully the victim again later. Then, the abuse becomes a cycle that only repeats itself. This is why many victims skip school to avoid their tormentors and the teachers and staff who continuously blame them for their own suffering.

I don’t blame these kids for staying home. Many times, I skipped class myself when I was in school. All because of bullying.

Who wants to be in an environment where people continuously abuse them? You might as well stay home because you’re so busy watching your back that you don’t learn anything.

If school staff fails to address bullying at the district level, more bullied kids will skip school to avoid being tormented. Therefore, schools will lose more funds.

In my opinion, it serves these schools right! It’s funny how things always run full circle!

Reasons to Leave a Toxic Environment

A Positive Environment

When you’re in the right environment, you thrive instead of survive. In other words, when you can learn in a place that is accepting, loving, and nurturing, you can grow and flourish.

In a positive environment, under the right conditions, you feel free to be yourself. You can express your own ideas and opinions confidently and without fear.

Also, you feel safe and secure. You can be confident and build positive relationships with others. Thus giving you the freedom to create and to show your talents.

The people around you encourage and support you. They cooperate and give you the freedom to be and do. Moreover, they gently nudge and push you to be your best. This is the kind of environment that nurtures your soul.

Whereas, in the wrong environment, you stumble and fall. When you’re stuck somewhere that is toxic, oppressive, restrictive, and harmful, you only survive.

In other words, you don’t work at your full potential. You only squeeze by. Instead of grow, you only stagnate, or worse, regress. In other words, instead of flourish, you only wither.

Culture of bullying In Schools:

A Toxic Environment

In a toxic environment, under terrible conditions, you aren’t free. You’re only a prisoner. You’re a slave – a victim.

Humans need more than just food and water to survive. They also need positivity and encouragement. They need healthy people around them. Also, human beings need diverse experiences instead of sameness.

Sadly, a toxic, bullying environment only promotes sameness. It doesn’t tolerate any form of diversity because it loathes anything different.

Environmental stimuli have a huge impact on your mental health and social interactions. Moreover, it can make you bitter or better. Your environment can either cause you to progress or regress.

Therefore, if you find yourself in an environment that sucks the oxygen out of you, you must remove yourself from it. Though it may not always be easy to do. Leaving a toxic place will salvage your self-esteem and mental health. In doing so, you will save yourself a lot of stress and heartache. Moreover, you will save yourself months of recovery.

Flowers Can’t Grow and Bloom Without Sunlight

Self-doubt kills dreams. It comes when bullies and abusers shower a target person with toxicity. Therefore, when all a person gets are insults and abuse for a long period of time, they become exhausted. Moreover, any positivity they once had is slowly drained from them until they’re totally depleted of it.

Eventually, if targets aren’t careful, they’ll start to believe their abusers. In other words, they’ll start seeing themselves through the eyes of their bullies. They’ll give up and others will see in them, a person who’s lackluster and slow.

When you’re a target of bullying, you’re like a flower that gets nothing but constant rain. The flower doesn’t grow and develop properly.

The consistent abuse zaps your energy and keeps you hyper-vigilant and on guard 24/7- waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Culture of bullying in Schools:

Bullying takes away your spirit.

In other words, you’re in survival mode. And you lose your happiness, confidence, pride, will, and purpose in life. In essence, your bullies take away your good qualities and turn you into a person you don’t even recognize anymore.

Bullying and abuse takes the joy out of your life. Moreover, you begin to daydream about escaping your current situation. If there is no escape route available, you feel stuck.

Then, you isolate yourself and become a recluse. You retreat into your own little fantasy world because it just feels safer that way.

Finally, you stop growing as a person because you live inside your head instead of observing life that’s going on around you. As a result you stop and learning the lessons life is trying to teach you.

All the while, the bullying and abuse you suffer only gets worse because everyone around you knows that you’re living inside your head and they ridicule you for it.

And people do not know what you are going through. Therefore, they may mistake you for being lazy, slow, or foolish.

However, it only causes you to retreat further inside yourself and the bullying only gets worse. It is a vicious cycle, and it is no way to live!

Culture of Bullying in Schools:

You must have a good balance of positive and negative experiences.

Not only do I understand how you feel inside, I understand why. Just as flowers can’t grow without sunlight, people can’t grow without positivity.

Flowers need a good balance of rain and sunlight and people need a good balance of positivity and negativity. They cannot survive on just negativity nor positivity.

Too much negativity or, in this case, toxicity, and the person’s emotional and psychological growth will be stunted. Moreover, their happiness, confidence, and dreams will die. As a result, they’ll give up.

Too much positivity, and they lose touch with the real world and real people. Therefore, they become arrogant, full of themselves, demanding, and tyrannical!

There has to be a healthy balance of both before a person can truly grow.

Culture of bullying in schools:

Never accept anything your bullies tell you.

Therefore, if you’re a target of bullying, never accept what bullies and abusers try to cram down your throat. I want you to realize that they don’t know you at all.

Although they may claim they know you more than you know yourself. The truth is, nobody can possibly know you like you do. Moreover, anyone who tells you otherwise is lying through their teeth.

Understand that bullies and abusers are miserable people who want you to be as miserable as they are. Therefore, stay away from those people. They aren’t worth your time or energy. Only keep company with people who love you and who uplift you!

Remember that there’s always hope. Also, realize that you’re worth much more than what your bullies say. Never let bullies destroy the things inside you that matter the most.

And those things are your self-love, self-respect, confidence, and sense of pride. Those things are yours and not for anyone else to have!

And how you do this is through self-care. If at all possible, remove yourself from the bullying environment. Go to a new place where you can grow and flourish.

In a new environment, you have the chance to make friends and be not only accepted, but celebrated!

Be your own hero and best friend. Be your own sunlight! Keep company with people who allow you to shine and the sun to shine on you!

This post was all about the culture of bullying in schools so that you can know whether your school has that toxic culture and convince your family to take advantage of school choice.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. School Choice: Why it’s a Godsend for Bullied Kids!

2. Bullying by Teachers in School: 7 Steps to Protect Yourself

3. Why do Schools Ignore Bullying? 7 Reasons Schools Do Nothing

4. Bullying Support: 7 Resources You Can Reach Out to

5. Things School Bullies Try to Hide: 13 Things They’re Ashamed Of

Effects of Bullying on the Victim: 13 Symptoms of Bullied People

March 4, 2025May 26, 20257 Comments

‘Want to know all the effects of bullying on the victim? Here are the symptoms you have if people constantly bully you.

When you endure bullying, especially after a long time, you go through so many emotions. Moreover, you know you must bury those emotions or people will punish you for them.

In this post, you will learn the effects of bullying on the victim. If you’re a victim, you must know these effects so that you’ll be able to express them better to a therapist or to a confidant.

Once you learn about these negative impacts, you’ll be able to talk to someone about it without rambling. You’ll also be motivated to take steps to either stand up for yourself or leave the environment.

This post is all about the effects of bullying on the victim so that you can effectively speak out about it. Also, you can begin doing what you must do to take care of yourself.

Effects of Bullying on the Victim

1. fear

It’s the intense fear you feel but don’t dare show. Moreover, it’s the paralyzing social fear that sets in. It only shuts you down and leaves you withdrawn from the rest of the world.

2. Hyper-Vigilance

Once people have bullied you for so long, you become intensely suspicious of every person you meet. Any laughter you hear, you automatically think, is directed at you. This is no way to live.

3. Pinned up Rage

After people bully you for so long, you become angry. In fact, you become enraged. But you don’t dare show it. Instead, you keep it buried deep, because you know that any show of emotion will bring even more bullying.

Therefore, you constantly keep your emotions in check.

4. confusion and bewilderment

Your bullies’ behavior confuses you. You often wonder what you did to make them so hateful and irate.

Moreover, you know that you should take a stand against the bullies. You know that you should speak out about it, only you don’t know how to do it, and you’re terrified that it will only make things worse.

5. Effects of Bullying on the Victim:

unanswered questions

A thousand questions play in your mind several times daily.

“Why me?” “What have I done to these people” and “How do I fix this?” are the questions you have in your head every time bullies surround you and harass you.

Moreover, you know what you want to say to the bullies.

“Look! Leave me the &%$# alone!” you scream inside your head but don’t’ dare say it because you know what’s likely to come next.

6. feelings of loneliness and isolation

When you suffer bullying, bullies smear you to keep you isolated and from making any new friends. At the same time, you automatically put up walls of protection to keep others out.

This only reinforces the separation from others.

7. loss of your entire personhood

In other words, you forget how to smile, laugh, and have a good time. In short, you forget how to connect with and interact with others.

Once bullies have browbeaten you for so long, you lose the vibrant, happy, and healthy person you once were.

Moreover, each insult, each rumor, each physical attack, each joke, and each prank cuts a little deeper. It chips away at your self-esteem, bringing you even lower.

You feel trapped, as if your bullies are holding you hostage!

8. Effects of Bullying on the Victim:

Constant Living in Survival Mode

Living in survival mode can make for a hellish life. Sadly, many targets of bullying go through day-to-day life surviving instead of thriving.

Consequently, this can have an impact on your successes with your family and relationships. You’re also likely to lose opportunities for advancement and for friendships.

Living in survival mode can also effect your mental and physical health.

Being stuck in survival mode can rob you of your personal power. Why?

Because personal power is essential to personal freedom. It’s the last vestige of power you have. Therefore, without it, you’re completely powerless.

9. Mental and physical exhaustion

And when you’re exhausted, you’re only running on fumes. You need extra sleep and have trouble getting out of bed in the mornings.

Moreover, you go into work or school at 8am dreading the day. Your butt drags around like an old, tired dog. You have zero energy, and constantly feel sluggish.

Living off raw adrenaline every day is never good. It can cause health problems, such as autoimmune disorders, hypertension, and heart issues.

10. Effects of Bullying On the Victim:

**Instead of living, you only exist.**

Instead of living a purposeful life, you only go through the motions. Circumstances beyond your control force you to only get by.

You have no chance of reaching your full potential and happiness quotient. Therefore, if you feel you can’t reach those levels, you don’t really live.

11. You either don’t have time to think about personal goals or you give up on them altogether.

When you busy living in survival mode, you’ll more than likely give up on your goals. Once you resign yourself, then the goal simply becomes just to survive and get through the day.

If you do think about your goals, those goals are only passing thoughts. Or you wish for your goals to materialize.

But here’s the thing about wishing instead of goal setting. Wishing denotes a spirit of lack instead of the spirit of abundance. A spirit of lack only invites more lack to come into your life.

You must understand that thoughts and feelings become our circumstances. In other words, what you think about, if even subconsciously, comes about.

12. You feel you must lie to people for your safety.

If people target you for bullying, chances are that you don’t like telling falsehoods. In fact, most victims of bullying hate lying! However, they do so out of fear and terror. Therefore, they lie out of self-preservation.

You see, a person who is under the threat of being harmed will do anything to remove that threat. Therefore, if they have to lie to save themselves, they’ll do it.

You must tell lie after lie just to survive! Why? Because you know the truth could get you hurt. So, you lie to make the bullying stop.

Consequently, if you aren’t careful, lying will eventually become a survival method.Moreover, it will turn into a terrible habit that’s hard to break.

13. Effects of Bullying on the Victim:

Learned Helplessness

After people have bullied and abused you for so long, you develop a condition called “Learned Helplessness.” In other words, you give up and forego any options you have to make a better life for yourself.

The only things you may know are bullying and abuse. Therefore, if those are the only things you know, you’re likely to stay stuck in relationships that hurt.

Moreover, you’ll probably stay in harmful environments. Why? Because bullies and abusers have conditioned you to believe that abuse is normal. Also, they make you think that it’s all you deserve and are ever going to get.

This happens to animals as well. Here’s a piece from the book, “The Body Keeps the Score,” by Bessel Van Der Kolk, M. D.

“Maier and Seligman had repeatedly administered painful electrical shocks to dogs who were trapped in locked cages. They called this condition, ‘inescapable shock.’”

“After administering several courses of electric shock, the researchers opened the doors of the cages and then shocked the dogs again. A group of control dogs who had never been shocked before immediately ran away, but the dogs who had earlier been subjected to inescapable shock made no attempt to flee, even when the door was wide open- they just lay there, whimpering and defecating. The mere opportunity to escape does not necessarily make traumatized animals, or people, take the road to freedom.

Like Maier and Seligman’s dogs, many traumatized people give up. Rather than risk experimenting with new options, they stay stuck in the fear they know.”

In other words, you allow the abuse because you think that there’s nothing you can do about it. Therefore, you give up and stop fighting.

Effects of Bullying On the Victim

In Conclusion:

This is why you must recognize the horrible effects of bullying when you feel them. Moreover, you should never to allow bullies and abusers to drive you to giving up.

In other words, never let these people brainwash you into believing that you’re helpless. Why? Because it will have devastating consequences for your entire life.

No matter how others treat you and how bad things get, you must hold on to your self-belief. And you must do it everything you have.

Also, you must hold on to hope and keep your eyes on your goals and dreams. Only then will you break the hold any bullies or abusers have on you.

You may not physically be able to escape the bullying and abuse. However, you still have control over your mind. You still have a say over what goes into your mind and what you choose to kick out of it.

Know that you have more power than you know. Use it! Realize that you’re worth it and you deserve to live in peace.

This post was all about the effects of bullying on the victim so that you can recognize the symptoms and call them by name if you have fallen victim.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Lack of Boundaries: 15 Signs You Need to Get Some

2. Signs of Gaslighting: The 7 Signs You Must Know

3. Signs of Toxic People: 5 Tell-Tale Indicators

4. Coercive Control: The Top 5 Signs and How to Escape It

5. The 4 Stages of Bullying