Signs of Low Self-Esteem and How to Correct It

February 4, 2025December 17, 20246 Comments

‘Want to know the signs of low self-esteem? Here are all the indicators that your self-esteem is broken and the best ways to repair it.

Low self-esteem makes for a miserable life. People who have it bypass opportunities that would otherwise improve their lives. Moreover, it can put a strain on relationships.

If you’re a target of bullying who’s self-esteem has been broken by bullies, this is the last thing you need. So, your first step is to know the signs of low self-esteem.

Therefore, in this post you will learn all the signs of low-self-esteem and how to recognize it in yourself and in others. Also, you’ll learn how to correct it in yourself so that you can raise your self-esteem, gather the courage to stand up to bullies, and ultimately, live a more fulfilling life.

Once you learn all this pertinent information, you will be prompted to take the necessary steps to improve your self-esteem so that you can take back control over your life.

Signs of low self-esteem

Let’s jump right into it. What are the signs of low self-esteem? And what can you do to raise it?

1. Lack of boundaries

When you have no boundaries, you let others walk all over you. You allow others to treat you like dirt. You don’t say no or stop when someone abuses you.

However, if you don’t set boundaries, you’ll only attract more bullies and predators in your life. Why? Because predatory people will see you coming a mile away!

Therefore, don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. You must understand that this is part of taking care of yourself.

Self-care isn’t selfish and you deserve well-treatment as much as the next person. Moreover, if people lash out at you for establishing boundaries, that’s your cue to ditch these losers and surround yourself with better people.

This will work wonders for your self-esteem

2. People-pleasing behavior

You can’t please everyone all the time. Therefore, people-pleasing doesn’t score you any points in the end. It only leaves you depleted and exhausted.

Realize that you can’t please everyone all the time and there are time when you must make yourself a priority. So, don’t be afraid to say no when you can’t fulfill someone’s request right away.

Know that there’s nothing wrong with pursuing your own interests when you must. And if anyone has a problem with it, it’s a sign you need to get rid of them.

This is how you place value on yourself. You do it by weeding out the users and abusers who only show up when they need something and get pissed when you’re in the middle of something else and can’t help them right away.

3. Signs of Low Self-Esteem:

approval-seeking behavior

What does approval-seeking behavior look like? Here are a few examples:

You change or soften your position when it looks like someone isn’t happy with where you stand. Or, you might give insincere compliments all for the sake of being liked.

Also, you may pretend to agree with someone when you really don’t. These are among the behaviors of approval-seeking and most people see right through it.

Therefore, be true to who you are. Stop pretending to be something you aren’t. People respect those who are authentic and have no time for someone who’s fake.

When you stop seeking approval, you’ll be amazed at what it does for your self-esteem!

4. Shyness/withdrawal

In other words, you avoid social situations because you’re afraid of rejection.

However, if you don’t take risks and put yourself out there, you’ll miss out on possible friendships and rewarding relationships. Here’s another thing to consider.

The best way to get rid of shyness is to take the focus off you and focus on the positives you can bring to others. This is what worked for me and it’ll work for you too.

5. Signs of Low Self-Esteem:

Fear of conflict

When you fear conflict, you go out of your way to avoid debates and disagreements. This is a close sister to seeking approval and people-pleasing because you pretend to agree when you really disagree.

For instance, you voice your opinion and others look like they disapprove. you notice their discomfort and suddenly change your opinion to line up with theirs.

You only do this to avoid any possible conflict you might have with them. However, if you don’t stay true to yourself, people will notice and they won’t respect you.

You must continue to be yourself even if others don’t like it. This is how you build your self-esteem.

6. Fear of failure

Fear of failure makes for an unsuccessful life. Understand that everyone fails at some point. However, those who keep trying eventually succeed. And they succeed because they keep trying no matter how many times they crash and burn.

Therefore, don’t be afraid to try. Why? Because if you don’t try, you surely won’t reach success. And think about this. You have a much higher chance of hitting your goals if you keep trying. But if you don’t try, you’ll have no chance whatsoever!

7. Signs of Low Self-Esteem:

Negative self-talk

Thinking things like, “I’m a loser,” or “I’ll never make it,” is negative self-talk. Therefore, if you continue with this inner dialogue, you’ll only motivate yourself to give up easily. Even worse, your self-esteem will sink even lower.

Instead, treat yourself as you would your best friend. Practice positive inner talk. This is how you turn negative thoughts to positive ones.

This may feel awkward at first because you aren’t used to thinking this way.

However, if you practice every day, it will feel less and less weird until it becomes like second nature. Try it! You’ll be surprise at how it raises your self-esteem!

8. Self-Depreciating jokes

You wouldn’t want anyone else to degrade you with jokes. So, why do it to yourself. Again, treat yourself like you would a best friend and watch your self-esteem improve dramatically!

9. Downplaying accomplishments

Any time you minimize your accomplishments and successes, it means that you don’t feel you deserve recognition and praise for them.

Therefore, be proud of your successes and don’t apologize for them. Realize that you aren’t being arrogant when you take pride in the things you’ve done.

When you allow yourself to bask in some of your accomplishments, you raise your self-esteem.

10. Signs of Low Self-Esteem:

Avoiding Eye Contact

Avoiding eye contact conveys fear and bullies can see this from a mile away! As a result, you become a target to those who wish to take advantage of you.

Therefore, practice good eye contact until it becomes nature. This will immensely improve your self-esteem.

11. Poor Posture

Slouching only shows the people around you that you don’t like yourself very much. And, trust me, they will treat you accordingly.

Therefore, learn to stand up straight with your head up and shoulders back. This is called confident body language and it’ll boost your self-esteem like magic!

12. downcast eyes

Looking down is another indicator of low self-esteem. When you look down all the time, it means that you’re afraid to look others in the eye.

Therefore, you’ll draw bullies and abusers to you instead of healthy, quality people who would otherwise be good friends and associates.

Therefore, never look down. Always look straight ahead and walk with purpose. These are other ways you can display confident body language and raise self-esteem.

13. Signs of Low Self-Esteem:

Toxic shame

When you feel toxic shame, you feel worthless. As a result, this can cause feelings of self-loathing and it will only cause you to behave in ways that signal that.

Therefore, if you haven’t done anything to deliberately harm anyone, what are you ashamed of? Take steps to find out where the shame comes from and take steps to get rid of it.

If you’re ashamed of the way you look, change the things you can change and accept the things about yourself that you can’t. It won’t be easy.

However, if you learn to embrace your imperfections, your self-esteem will soar!

14. self-doubt

Self-doubt comes from bullying and abuse. It comes from others who teach you that you can’t make choices on your own without screwing up.

However, realize that those people probably told you these things just to keep you down and steal your power. Once you realize their true motivations, you’ll be more compelled to trust your instincts, your decisions, and yourself.

Moreover, when you begin trusting yourself fully, your self-esteem will improve tremendously!

15. Self-comparison

There are reasons why well-meaning people tell you to never compare yourself to others. It’s because it kills your self-esteem.

Realize that we’re all different and that different people are good at different things. In other words, we all have different talents and gifts.

Therefore, instead of focusing on what they can do better than you, focus on the things YOU are best at! Then practice your talents and show them off.

I guarantee you that your self-esteem will thank you for it!

16. Signs of Low Self-Esteem:

Trust issues

Whether your trust issues is with your partner or with people in general, it’s not a good sign. In order to have a social life, you must learn to trust other people.

In other words, you must take risks. Realize that encountering a few assholes is a part of life and you should expect it. However, don’t let them cause you to sink into paranoia.

Instead, deal with the bullies and assholes accordingly. Stand up to them and tell them to piss off. Then keep doing your thing!

This is how you keep your self-esteem from tanking.

17. Difficulty accepting compliments

Any time someone gives you a genuine compliment. Tell them thank you. Real compliments are something to be grateful for and they feel good.

However, when you have low self-esteem, you have a hard time taking compliments because you don’t think that you deserve them. Moreover, you may feel that the person paying you that compliment may have ulterior motives.

However, think about this. Most people won’t pay you a compliment unless they feel you’ve earned it. Therefore, accept it with grace, smile, and say thank you.

Then let it repair your self-esteem. I promise you. If you start being grateful for the compliments people give you, you’re likely to get more of them, which will give your self-esteem a huge boost!

This post was all about the signs of low self-esteem so that you can recognize them in yourself and make the necessary change to boost it.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How to Overcome Low Self-Esteem: 7 Insanely Easy Ways

2. Raising Self-Esteem: 5 Easy Mind Hacks that Help

3. Bullying and Self Confidence: 7 Steps to Keeping Your Confidence Up When People Bully You

4. Knowing Yourself: Why it’s the First Step in Building Confidence

5. Lack of Boundaries: 15 Signs You Need to Get Some

The Bullied Brain: 7 Ways Bullying Effects Mental Health

January 13, 2025January 14, 20259 Comments

‘Want to know what happens in the bullied brain? Here are the changes that happen in the brain of a bullied person that you need to know about.

Prolonged bullying can cause actual changes in the brains of it’s victims. And these changes aren’t good.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about the bullied brain and the exact changes that victims’ brain goes through.

Once you learn all about these negative brain changes, you will be able to better describe how bullying has changed you. Also, you will be more motivated to take the steps needed to protect your mind from vicious bullies.

This post is all about the bullied brain and why it’s important for you not only to protect your your mind from bullying.

The Bullied Brain

Bullying and Changes in the Brain

As we know, bullying can cause victims lots of trauma. However, bystanders also suffer a degree of trauma as well, just by witnessing it.

For now, let’s talk about what bullying does to targets, since it affects them the most.

Any form of psychological trauma, whether it comes from combat, rape, or bullying, changes the physiology of the brain.

Furthermore, it reprograms the brain’s alarm system. It also causes a sharp increase in stress hormones.

Put simpler, it changes the way the brain distinguishes real information from fake information. And lastly it comes more difficult for the brain to tell the difference between information that relevant and that which is irrelevant.

Because of these changes, you become hyper-vigilant. In fact, some victims and survivors become so much so that they cannot function day to day.

Once you’ve suffered enough trauma, you may have difficulty learning from experience. As a result, you may often repeat the same destructive behaviors. This is why others often accuse you of being a “bad” person.

Also, others may label you as lazy, stubborn, immoral, and having bad character.

1. Bullying rewires Your brain to prepare for a hostile environment.

You must understand that this is what happens when people bully you for long periods of time. It will rewire your brain to prepare for a hostile environment.

In other words, you will have difficulty trusting people. You’ll come to only expect hostility from them.

Moreover, people may accuse you of being lazy when you’re only dealing with “learned helplessness.” And learned helplessness is a common result of repeated and prolonged bullying and verbal abuse.

Also, others may accuse you of being defiant and stubborn when you’re actually shutting down.

Moreover, they may also accuse you of hotheadedness or craziness when you’re actually defending yourself. Or, you could be experiencing the release of pinned up rage.

This sudden out-pour of raw emotions often results from being abused, then silenced and punished for speaking out and defending yourself.

2. The bullied brain:

Prolonged and Repeated Bullying and Abuse Causes Learned Helplessness.

If you suffer repeated bullying and abuse, you may have no way of defending yourself. Moreover, certain circumstances may leave you with no way of fleeing and escaping the bullying and toxic environment.

Learned helplessness doesn’t only come from repeated bullying and abuse. It also comes from feelings of entrapment.

In other words, it’s caused from feeling powerless to do anything to better your situation.

For example, if a group of bullies lock the door of the bathroom and surrounds you, they block any escape. They then hold you down as they attack you.

This is likely to cause “learned helplessness.”

Here’s another example. You report the bullying to the school principal or teacher. But instead of helping you, the school staff only blame you and refuse to help.

Then, the next day, the bullies retaliate and beat you to a pulp for snitching. Even worse, this happens several times until you finally give up trying to take care of yourself.

Thus, you develop learned helplessness.

Battered Wife Syndrome: Another example of the Bullied Brain

A battered wife is constantly threatened by her abusive husband. He tells her that, if she leaves, he will take the children from her, or kill her, or worse, kill her entire family.

As a result, she feels trapped in an abusive marriage with no way out. Therefore, she is likely to develop battered wife syndrome, which is another form of learned helplessness.

Understand that it’s not so much the bullying and abuse that causes this condition. There have been many abused and bullied people who have escaped their situations.

They later became highly independent, healthy, and successful people.

What causes learned helplessness is the inability to oppose or escape the abuse. In other words, you develop learned helplessness when bullies and abusers block you from any possible paths of escape.

Why? Because you have no other recourse than to take the abuse quietly just to survive. That is what causes “learned helplessness.”

This also happens when you have no one to turn to for help. When no one will listen to or believe you, the condition of learned helplessness has a strong chance of developing.

3. You become exhausted and lose the will to fight back.

When people bully you, it can be extremely exhausting. Understand that bullies know this. Therefore, they’ll deliberately wear you down to take the fight out of you. Then, they can take control over your life.

At first, you may defend yourself, fiercely asserting your rights to human dignity, respect and safety. However, most bullies don’t recognize human rights.

They only see your acts of self-defense and self-protection as a threat to their power. Therefore, they only double down.

In other words, your bullies intensify the hatred and abuse to keep you fighting until they mentally and physically exhaust you.

You finally become so tired that you lose your will to fight back. You then decide that it’s much easier just to give up.

4. The Bullied Brain:

You lose the ability to recognize mistreatment.

When you’re used to being treated well, you can see bullying more clearly. Therefore, you know the difference when it happens.

However, after you endure bullying for so long, the lines get blurred, and you lose the ability to see aggression so clearly. This happens especially if the hostility is subtle.

Finally, you reach a point where you don’t recognize abuse at all!

5. Bullies condition you to accept bad behavior from others.

After bullies have verbally abused you for so long, you begin to believe their words. In other words, bullies have abused you until you finally start to believe that you somehow deserve it.

These damaging self-beliefs happen after the bullies, their followers, and bystanders have repeatedly abused you and prevented you from defending yourself.

Put another way, they have drummed into your head that you are worthless. Moreover, they have repeated that lie over and over until you begin to believe it too.

6. The Bullied Brain:

You begin to punish yourself.

You do this by engaging in risky or self-destructive behaviors. you may hang with the wrong people and befriend those who only tolerate you. Moreover, you may participate in risky sexual behavior or having relationships with abusive partners.

7. You contemplate suicide.

After bullies have tormented you for so long, the torture can reach a point to where you think of suicide. It’s not that you want to die, per se. However, when people constantly bully you without stopping, you may feel that dying is the only way to make it stop.

The Bullied Brain: Understand that Bullying is One Big PsyOp

Think about it. Governments and their military use psyop operations by starting propaganda campaigns. When bullies employ smear campaigns and verbal abuse against you, it is the equivalent of a government propaganda campaign but on a much smaller scale.

Therefore, understand that propaganda campaigns and smear campaigns are pretty much the same and they both have the same purpose. To demoralize the enemy.

When people bully you, they consider you the enemy and want to demoralize you. Therefore, you must realize that, if bullies can demoralize you, they can then crush your will to stand up for yourself and fight back.

The Bullied Brain:

Here’s How Bullies Attempt to demoralize you.

Bullies will tell you things, such as:

“You’re not strong (pretty, smart) enough.”
“No body likes you” or “You don’t have any friends.”
“You can’t fight against us.”
“You’ll always be a nobody” or “You’ll never amount to anything.”
“No one will ever date you (or) marry you.”
“You’ll never win that contest.”
“You’ll never make the team.”

You’ll never this and you’ll never that. You must realize that these statements mean to mentally subdue you. In other words, they force you to give up your natural reluctance to bow down and take abuse.

Understand that your bullies must slowly weaken you so that you won’t stand up to them. And once they do, you’ll give up on yourself and allow them to just walk all over you.

In Conclusion:

Understand that you must take care of your mental health and self-esteem if you want to avoid these results in the future.

Therefore, make sure you have friends outside of the bullying environment that you can talk to. Also, turn to supportive family members for help.

Do things you enjoy and keep company with positive and uplifting people any time you’re away from the bullies.

Your goal is to balance everything out by adding healthy and positive relationships and experiences. You must cultivate these relationships even if they’re outside the bullying environment.

This balance will soften the blows to your self-esteem and provide a buffer to your bullies’ attacks.

This Post is all about the bullied brain and why you should take steps to protect your mind just as you would your body

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. The Effects of Bullying: 17 Negative Results on Victims

2. Fear of Setting Boundaries: 5 Reasons You Don’t Stand Up to Bullies

3. The Explaining Trap: 3 Reasons Bullies Set It and How to Respond

4. Psychological Effects of Gaslighting: 11 Ways it Impacts Victims

5. Why do Schools Ignore Bullying? 7 Reasons Schools Do Nothing

Who are Usually the Victims of Bullying? 11 Traits of Bully Targets

November 12, 2024November 24, 20244 Comments

If you have a soft spot for those who are bullied, you often ask yourself, “Who are usually the victims of bullying?” So, ‘want to know who they are. Here are the 11 characteristics of typical victims bullies like to target that you must become familiar with.

Many victims of bullying get blamed for altercations their bullies provoke because the perpetrators are experts at playing the victim and avoiding accountability. Therefore, it can be difficult for authority members to know which person is the bully and which is the target.

Who are usually the victims of bullying? This can be a tough one for superiors to figure out.

As someone who has dealt with these kinds of situations, I’m giving you all the characteristics of a typical target of bullying so that you will better be able to see through the bully’s facade and calmly call it out.

In this post, you will learn the thirteen traits of the marked person of bullying so that you will be more aware of how bullying effects you.

Once you learn about these victim features, you will be better able to report your bullies much more calmly and lessen your chances of taking the blame for their bad behavior.

This post is all about the traits of the typical victim of bullying so that you can have this information to show your superiors if ever you encounter bullies.

who are usually the victims of bullying?

When bystanders or authority witness bullying, it can be difficult for them to know which person is the bully and which is the target.

But why is this? Because most seasoned bullies are cunning, clever, and covert. In other words, not all bullies resort in physical violence.

Bruises, cuts, and broken bones are easy to see. Therefore, many bullies use psychological tactics and emotional manipulation to bully you.

Moreover, they may use psycho/emotional methods to set you up to either be physically attacked or to get into trouble with authority.

Remember that bullies have ways of slyly provoking you and setting you up to look like the aggressor.

bullies use gaslighting as a powerful tool.

Additionally, bullies have ways of gaslighting you and making you doubt your own sanity. They have a knack for manipulating your emotions and making you feel guilty for things you aren’t guilty of.

Moreover, these people also have ways of brainwashing you over time and turning you against yourself. They know how to make you feel as if you did something to justify their mistreatment and abuse.

As a result, you won’t know how to save yourself from those who unjustly accuse and label you. This is because you’ll have difficulty identifying and naming the tactics bullies use against you.

Therefore, you won’t know how to explain what is happening to you or report the bullying without sounding like you’re rambling.

The end result will be that your bullies and the circumstances they force on you will convince you and those in power that you are the culprit.

Moreover, if you happen to be the person who witnesses someone else being bullied, you’re likely to point a finger at the wrong person.

Therefore, here are the 11 traits victims of bullying share.

1. who are usually the victims of bullying? They’re the people with the least power.

Having the least amount of power automatically makes you an easy target. Why? Because the less power you have, the least likely you defend yourself. Bullies instinctively know this.

Moreover, powerlessness is sometime you can’t hide no matter how hard you try. Why? Because it will seep through in your body language and in the way you carry yourself.

And bullies are masters at reading people and can sniff out your weaknesses and low vibration. They’ll see you coming a mile away.

Understand that when bullies are like sharks that smell blood in the water. When they sense prey, they take full advantage.

2. those with the least social capital.

In other words, they’re very unpopular and have the least amount of friends, allies, and supporters. Why, because bullies tend to defame their victims to block their chances of getting support.

Moreover, having few people or no one behind you makes you easy prey for even more bullies to come for you. Understand that a pack of wolves always goes after that one elk that gets separated from the herd.

3. Victims of bullying tend to have the least influence.

It takes a confident person and yes, even an arrogant person to have influence. People with influence not only have better control over what happens to them but also may have control over what happens to others.

Most victims have no influence because they can’t seem to control what happens to them. If they did, they wouldn’t constantly have bullies on their tail.

4. Who are usually the victims of bullying? They’re the people that others like or love the least.

This goes back to victims of bullying having the least social capital. If you have few people or no one who loves or likes you, then you stand the least chance of getting help and support.

Therefore, this leaves you at the mercy of bullies.

Again, predators always go after the lone animal.

5. People others hate the most.

Those who hate you want you to suffer. Hate is an obsession. Moreover, bullies do have an obsession over their victims. However, being hated can cause big problems for you.

Why, because if most people already hate you, they’re most likely to join the bullies in tormenting you.

6. Victims are usually the person people can openly bully and abuse and get away with it.

Because most victims of bullying have the least power, social capital, and influence, bystanders will most likely refuse to help them when bullies come calling. Moreover, because they’re the most hated and least liked, bystanders are likely to team up with the bullies and join in the attacks.

Add all this up and school staff, company management, or even police probably won’t help the victim either.

If you fall into this category, I cannot stress enough the importance of being your own advocate. You may be afraid to open your mouth and yes, things may get worse for you if you do. However, if you don use your voice, things will get worse anyway.

7. Who are usually the victims of bullying? They’re usually those from abusive homes or who live in poverty.

Remember that abuse and bullying are one and the same. Bullying is abuse. Therefore, victims from abusive homes become objects of bullying because they’re already wounded.

Because they’re wounded, they automatically put out that bullied vibe through their energy and body language. Unfortunately, bullies are experts at reading people and can pick up on this very quickly.

As mentioned in earlier posts, bullies are like ravenous sharks that smell blood in the water or a pack of wolves that pick out the sickest member in a herd of deer.

Therefore, they select the already-abused victim to prey on.

Bullies will also select victims who live in poverty because of the clothes they wear or their hygiene. It’s not hard to ferret out indigence because it often shows through appearance and level of cleanliness.

Moreover, these victims will often feel insecure and have low self-esteem, giving out vibes and energy that match.

Money is power and lack of it spells powerlessness. Bullying is about power. Therefore, bullies will instantly sense these things and select these victim to harass and ridicule.

Lastly, people from abusive homes and the indigent are most likely to have low self-esteem. And those with low self-esteem are dead ringers for bullying because they’re least likely to fight back.

8. victims of bullying are usually those who are kindhearted.

Bullies automatically see kindness as weakness. Therefore, empaths and others who are sweet and kind become fair game.

Moreover, people who bully may be envious of the kindly victim’s qualities because they, themselves, lack them. So, bullies often bully the kindhearted out of jealousy.

And because the kindhearted tend to be well-loved by others, bullies also target them out of social envy.

9. Bullies also like to bully people with physical, mental, or intellectual disabilities.

Bullies are notorious for bullying anyone who is different and out of the ordinary. People with disabilities fit that bill in the eyes of many, sadly.

Moreover, cruel people often see disability as a weakness and this attracts bullies like a T-Rex to raw meat!

Here’s something else to be aware of. Because disabled people are likely to draw a monthly disability check, bullies will accuse them of fakery, laziness, and leaching on the taxpayer.

I can’t tell you the countless horror stories I’ve heard from SSDI recipients about the bullying and harassment they suffered and the same accusations their bullies hurled at them. And it’s heartbreaking!

10. Who are usually the victims of bullying? People with low self-esteem and introverts who are quiet.

Bullies can sniff out low self-esteem very quickly and from far off. In fact, they seem to have radars for it!

Low self-esteem is difficult to hide because it very subtly seeps out through your body language and your entire demeanor. Moreover, people with low self-esteem carry themselves complete different from those with healthy self-esteem.

They slouch when they sit or stand. Whereas, people with healthy self-esteem will hold their shoulders back and stand up straight.

Also those with low self-esteem tend to have downcast eyes and hold their heads down. On the other hand, confident people look up and ahead while holding their heads high and lengthening the neck.

Naturally, bullies take notice and, therefore, take full advantage!

On the other hand, bullies often select introverts who often have quiet confidence because they mistake their reserved nature for low self-esteem. This is why they often bullies get the shock of their lives when the quiet target defends themselves and ends up kicking a bully’s butt up between their shoulders.

Therefore, still waters run deep and bullies need to watch out when messing with the quiet ones. Because quiet people are unpredictable!

11. People who are exceptionally gifted and smart.

Bullies are jealous of anyone who is intelligent and gifted because they often receive recognition and accolades for those talents.

This threatens bullies’ power and status. Moreover, it delivers a huge blow to their overinflated egos. Why, because bullies have an obsessive need to be A-1 best at everything, all the time. Moreover, they crave attention and admiration and they don’t like to share it.

When some bright individual comes along and others see their talents and gifts, it automatically takes some of the favor and spotlight away from the bullies.

Therefore, is it any wonder bullies target these super-smart people to bully? Realize that having enemies doesn’t always mean that there’s something wrong with you. In most cases, it means there’s something right about you.

If you’re a target, you must find a way to report your bullies and better explain your situation. Documentation, using the 5W rule is the safest way of not only gathering your evidence, but also reporting the bullying.

This post answers the question, “Who are usually the victims of bullying?” Moreover, it covers all the characteristics of all types of victims to debunk any myths and give you clues as to why bullies bully you and ways you can Report it and use it to your advantage.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Easy Targets for Bullies: 6 Groups of People Bullies Love to Target

2. Setting Boundaries: 3 Powerful Practices to Hold Your Ground

3. How to Stop Being Too Nice: 5 Powerful Changes that Win Respect

4. Important Facts About Bullying: 3 Truths You Must Learn

5. How Do Bullies Pick Their Victims? Here are Your Answers.

How Does Bullying Affect the Victim’s Friendships?

October 23, 2024October 23, 20243 Comments

How does bullying affect the victim’s friendships? It’s a question that needs answering in great detail.

Bullying not only impacts the victim’s health, but also their friendships and social life.

In this post, you will have the exact answers to the question, “How does bullying affect the victim’s friendships?” Moreover, we will go over all the impacts in detail, discussing the hows and why’s of it.

Once you learn these social ramifications, you will be more motivated to help your bullied loved one. Or, if you’re the victim, you will be compelled to take powerful steps to protect yourself.

This post gives all the answers to the burning question, “How does bullying affect the victim’s friendships?” Moreover, we discuss how you can reverse the social damages bullying causes you if you’re a victim.

How does bullying affect the victim’s relationships?

1. Your Friends May Endure Social Pressure

They may be afraid that your bullies may bully them too.

Your friends may endure social pressure to turn on you. Understand that bullies go after your friends to make them afraid of being seen with you. Why? Because your bullies’ intentions is to isolate you from everyone else.

No one wants to be bullied, and that includes your friends. Therefore, when your bullies bully them too, you then become a liability to them. And once they see you as the cause to their social suffering and a threat to their social position, it’s not a question of if but when they turn on you.

“But what would the bullies have to gain by isolating me?” You may ask.

By isolating you, they make you more vulnerable to their abuse. ‘You see? Having friends means having support. In other words, friends are a line of defense and bullies know this.

Therefore, they manipulate your friends to turn them against you to strip you of any support (or defenses) you may have.

They do this because, without friends to support and defend you, your bullies can bully you freely and without fear of anyone retaliating or holding them accountable.

In other words, when there isn’t the possibility of anyone helping you, bullies have full and complete carte blanche to attack you anytime they feel like it.

2. How does bullying affect the victim’s friendships?

Your Friends May be Tempted by the Prospect of Social Status.

It’s human nature to want social status. We all want it. However, decent people know that it isn’t the end all be all.

With that said, your friends may decide that they want to climb the social ladder more than they want to continue associating with you. Therefore, they cease contact with you.

But, realize that these people never were your friends. If they were, they never wouldn’t dropped you in the first place.

You don’t lose friends, you lose frauds.

3. Your Friends Allow Your Bullies to Use Them to Get Information on You.

First, let me say this. If your friends allow your bullies to use them to get personal information and deep secrets about you and your life, then they aren’t friends at all. What they are, is a bunch of two-faced sellouts!

Additionally, these types of individuals are than enemies because, with enemies, you know exactly where you stand. Therefore, you know it’s best to keep your distance from them. In other words, you know to keep these people out of your life.

Not so with traitors. A traitor will be sneaky, and they’ll make it a point to stick close to you so that they can continue to get juicy information about your life, with which to report back to your bullies.

So, what are ways bullies use your so-called friends to bait you?

1. How Does Bullying Affect the Victim’s Friendships?

Your Bullies Have Your Friends ask you personal questions.

Your (fake)friends won’t seem nosy when they ask you. They’ll come under the pretense of deep concern for your well-being. They’ll have you fooled, thinking they really care about you when they’re only trying to gather your private details.

2. They have them stick extra close to you.

Your so-called friends will watch you closely and scrutinize everything you say and do. Also, they’ll try to find out who you associate with besides them.

These people will want to know who your family members are, where you live, everything. Therefore, beware when they seem to latch onto you like a tick to a dog.

3. They have them go through your belongings when you aren’t around.

Oh, yes! Your fake friends will go through your purse. Moreover, they’ll go through your notebook to see what you’re writing in it, and they’ll snoop through your email.

For example, two of your friends are visiting you at home. You’re all sitting in your living room and having coffee. You suddenly have to go to the bathroom and you excuse yourself, telling them you’ll be right back.

Then, one of them gets up and noses through your mail while the other keeps an eye out for you.

Another example would be that they may even swing by the night before trash pick-up day and grab your trash after you set it out by the curb. They will then take it somewhere safe and snoop through it.

4. How Does Bullying Affect the Victim’s Friendships?

Your bullies have your friends hawk your social media profiles and pages.

Sadly, many people post things on social media they really shouldn’t. Or they post things that are too easily taken out of context.

For example, in the early days of Facebook, I’ll admit that I posted a complaint from time to time. These were posts about bad service, idiot drivers, and ignorant people (without name-dropping, of course).

Although I didn’t post anything personal, it still wasn’t good policy. Understand that these are posts that can very easily be taken out of context, so it’s probably better to keep any complaints private.

Why are your Friends the first people bullies approach?

It’s no secret that many bullies are brazen. Therefore, they’ll have the audacity to go to your friends to get secrets about you because they don’t fear that your friends will tell them to piss off.

And in most cases they won’t.

It’s especially painful when those you thought were friends suddenly go turncoat. In other words, it’s not the bullies who hurt you the most. It’s the betrayal from friends and the silence of bystanders.

Therefore, understand that during a smear campaign, your friends will be at the top of your bullies’ list of people they wish to win over to their side.

Here’s why.

1. How does bullying affect the victim’s friendships?

Bullies know that if they can get the people you care about and trust the most to turn against you, they’ll be able to strike a devastating blow!

Again, having bullies, total strangers and people you don’t care much about turn against you is painful.. However, it’s much easier to take than if it’s someone you care about.

Nothing hurts worse than having the people you love most and think highly of turn against you.

2. By persuading your most cherished friends to turn against you, your bullies take away much needed social support.

In other words, if they can isolate you from your friends, bullies know that they can make you more vulnerable. Moreover, they know that you’re likely to become stressed and your performance and activities will take a hit.

This will make it much easier for them to bully you.

3. Your friends Likely know the most intimate details about you and your life.

Bullies know that if they can get your friends to turn against you, then they will have complete access to the most private knowledge about you.

In other words, your friends will most likely know about your deepest, darkest secrets and weaknesses.

Moreover, they may also be privy to about any future plans you’re making. and anything you may have said about the bullies.

Bullies can easily exploit, even weaponize these kinds of information.

4. How Does Bullying Affect The Victim’s Friendships.

**there’s a strong chance that if Friends turn against you, bystanders will too.**

People will figure that if your own friends turn against you, then damn! You must really have it coming! You must have done something pretty lowdown and dirty!

They may wonder if you slept with your best friend’s boyfriend or spouse. Maybe you stole from a friend. Maybe you emotionally abused their child.

When others see that your own friends have turned against you, all these above possible reasons immediately come to mind. That’s the worst thing about being hung out to dry.

5. associating with you may cause your friends’ positions on the social scene to weaken. Therefore, they put themselves at risk of becoming the next target.

Why, because people consider those who are bullied as unattractive and therefore, go out of their way to avoid forming friendships with them.

So, if your own friends turn against you, why would anyone else be fool enough to have anything to do with you?

Here’s what you should do:

Whatever you do, don’t be nice about it!

If nothing else, realize this. Anyone who claims to be a friend and stabs you in the back has no place in your life. Moreover, if you find out they’ve betrayed you, it’s time to ditch and switch to new friends.

Also, it’s best to make friends outside the bullying environment. Then you can show these new friends the awesome you that you can’t show in the environment you’re bullied in.

When you drop these people, you might be friendless for a while. However, think about this.

Did you have any friends in the first place while your fake friends were betraying you? Wouldn’t you rather be alone than to deal with fakers who only pretend to be for you when they’re really siding with the enemy?

Therefore, ditch your fake friends, then wait for better people to find you. I promise you that they will eventually.

This post provided all the answers to the question, “How does Bullying affect the victim’s friendships” so that you’ll know what to expect out of many of your friends when bullies bully you and what you can do to retake your self-respect.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Choose Your Friends Wisely: 9 Criteria to Judge by

2. How to Spot Fake Friends: 7 Proven Tricks to Instantly Out Them

3. Fake Friends: 13 Surefire Signs They Don’t Like You for You

4. How to Spot Fake Friends: 7 Proven Tricks to Instantly Out Them

5. 25 Signs of a Toxic Person

Bullying and Self Confidence: 7 Steps to Keeping Your Confidence Up When People Bully You

September 30, 2024September 29, 20246 Comments

Bullying and self confidence can exist when you’re being bullied. In other words, there are ways you can continue to be confident when you endure bullying.

‘Want to know how to do it? Here are 7 steps to keeping your confidence up when others continue to bully you.

Bullies can crush your self confidence, that much is true. But only if you let them. As someone who has been there, I’m giving you the steps you need to preserve your self-esteem.

In this post you will learn ways to save your confidence when others bully you.

Once you learn about these steps, it will become easier to continue feeling good about yourself when others try to drag you down.

As a result, you will have the courage to stand up to bullies and make your own choices.

This post is all about bullying and self confidence. It also explains the tips that will help you stand strong against bullying and lead a happier and healthier life.

Bullying and Self Confidence

When you’re being bullied by everyone, holding onto your self-esteem can be challenging. And that’s putting it mildly. Moreover, after being bullied, it can sometimes take years to regain the confidence you lost.

However, there are things you can do to buffer your confidence and take the sting out of your bullies’ attacks.

7 Steps to Protect Your Self-Esteem

1. Watch and Listen.

You may not know it, but bullies have those who talk about them too. Believe me when I tell you. Bullies also have enemies, and lots of them. And why not?

Your tormentors have been walking over others for a long time. Therefore, you can bet that they’ve left a long trail of foes behind them. These are enemies who will be more than happy to dish out the tea about them. So, know that it isn’t wrong to get the information.

2. Know that you aren’t the only one these creeps have bullied.

Understand that seasoned bullies have had plenty of practice over the years. There have been other victims before you, and there will be more after you. Why do you think these people are so good at making you feel bad about yourself?

Moreover, how do you think they got so good at it? They certainly didn’t get that way by magic, nor did it happen overnight. No.

Their successful bullying tactics came from many years of trial and error. As a result, they’ve figured out what works and what doesn’t.

Therefore, there have been plenty of previous victims for them to practice on.

3. Bullying and Self Confidence:

Collect info on your bullies.

In other words, find out about their personal lives. Realize that your bullies have problems too. Otherwise, they wouldn’t be going out of their way to make you miserable.

As I stated earlier, your bullies have enemies, and plenty of them. Find those enemies. Then, cozy up to them and finesse a little information out of them.

Listen closely as they tell you all the dirty details about them. You will be surprised at what you find out!

4. Befriend others whom your bullies have bullied.

You and these people have something in common. Therefore, this should be a cinch!

Align yourself with these other victims. Bullies run in packs, so, why can’t victims?

Understand that there is strength in numbers. If you ban together, it’s a sure bet that your bullies will think twice before accosting you.

Remember that bullies are cowards. They would prefer to catch you when you’re alone rather than confront you while you’re in a group.

5. Bullying and Self Confidence:

Keep company only with people who love you and make you feel good about yourself.

A good sign of a true friend is someone who uplifts you and helps your confidence soar. This person uplifts and encourages you. Moreover, they have your back when you’re in trouble, and cheer for you when you reach success.

However, victims of bullying often end up with fake friends who only tolerate them. As a result, these losers only find ways to humiliate them in public, then throw them under the bus when trouble comes for them.

This is because victims often become desperate for friends and companionship. Therefore, they latch onto the wrong people. Sadly, some of these targets would rather have sorry excuses for friends who treat them poorly than to have none at all.

In other words, they are under the false belief that anything is better than being by yourself. Having made that mistake myself, I’ve learned that it’s better to be alone.

Trust me when I tell you, anyone who belittles you even a little bit is not your friend! They’re only there because they know that you’re lonely. And, to an unsavory person, lonely means vulnerable and easy to use.

Therefore, these types only hang around to take advantage of you.

This is why you must remove these creeps from your life, and find better friends who respect you. Moreover, you must continue to keep company with those who genuinely like you and want to be with you.

Know that you deserve people who celebrate you, not those who only tolerate you.

6. Bullying and Self Confidence:

Show off your talents and gifts.

In other words, if you can sing, enter talent shows! If you can write, enter writing contests! If you know you’re good at something, find ways to show it off!

You’ll be surprised at how much it raises your self-esteem.

If you haven’t gotten up the courage to do these things yet, know that I understand because I’ve been there.

The bullying you suffer can increase such that you begin to fear showing anyone what you do well. You’re not only afraid that people will laugh at you, you’re also afraid that bullies will punish you for showing off.

However, understand that you have one shot and the time to take it is now. There are no do-overs. If you give in to fear and forgo doing what you’d really like to do, you’ll end up regretting it later.

Therefore, come out of your shell and take every opportunity to showcase your talents! Who knows where it might take you?

Also, you must take care of yourself. Exercise and eat well to take good care of your body. But don’t forget to take care of your mental health too. This is equally important!

7. Bullying and Self Confidence:

Do the things that fill your soul.

Whether you love to swim, hike or camp, find opportunities to do these things. The more happy moments you create for yourself, the less of an effect bullying will have on you!

Doing these things will lesson the pain of bullying attacks. Why? Because you’ll know that you have friends, allies, talents, and positive moments in life that counter anything your bullies try to tell you.

As a result, you’ll feel much better about yourself. Moreover, you’ll be able to respond to their drivel with an inner horselaugh and a middle finger.

Also, it will help tip the balance of adversity and success more in your favor. Many targets of bullying often have a ton of social failures and only a tiny few successes.

Therefore, if you do all these things, you’ll soon achieve a healthy balance between the two.

But, if you allow bullies to destroy your confidence, they’ll also destroy your life. It’s a fact!

If your confidence goes, so goes your performance, your social abilities, and everything else!

Think about it. Most bullied children and teens do not do well in school if others do not treat them fairly. In other words, kids in school need respect and for people to give them space, opportunity, and freedom to learn and grow.

It’s the same for adults in the workplace. If an employee endures workplace bullying, it won’t be long before their work performance declines.

Moreover, once job performance goes down, others will take notice. Even worse, bullies in the department will only weaponize it. How? By using it as confirmation that the targeted employee isn’t as smart as he appears.

Therefore, when a person is bombarded with consistent put-downs, nitpicking, and abuse, they eventually stop believing in themselves. As a result, their performance suffers.

Although we hear of bullied kids who compensate for their social failures by diving into schoolwork, and making exceptional grades, these kids are exceptions to the rule.

So, if you ever encounter bullying, you must guard your self-esteem with your life. Why? Because your life truly does depend on it!

Bullying and Self Confidence:

Here’s are other ways you protect your self-esteem.

Be there for others who are suffering.

Take pride in your appearance and look your best. Because if you look great, you feel great!

Make affirmations- “I AM” statements to yourself every day. “I AM beautiful,” “I AM smart,” “I AM better than what they say,” etc.

Find a therapist to talk to.

Tell the people who love you about what you’re going through.

And, whatever you do, Don’t be silent about it!

Take these steps to raise your confidence levels and, before long, you’ll notice a huge difference in the way you see yourself. I guarantee it!

This post was all about bullying and self confidence to help you take measures to improve your confidence levels and your life!

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How to Stop Caring What People Think: 9 Powerful Steps

2. Acceptance and Tolerance: 5 Best Ways to Know the Difference

3. Putting Yourself First: 7 Powerful Self-Care Practices

4. Important Facts About Bullying: 3 Truths You Must Learn

5. Fake Friends: 13 Surefire Signs They Don’t Like You for You