loving yourself in an environment that hates you reddit

Loving Yourself in an Environment that Hates You

Loving yourself in an environment that hates you is one of the biggest challenges you face when people constantly bully you. However, you can do it! Here’s how to love yourself in the middle of bullying so that you can emerge from it with your self-esteem and mental health intact.

loving yourself in an environment that hates you

Loving yourself can be challenging when people target you for bullying. How can you feel good about yourself when the only thing you hear from others is negativity?

In this post you will learn all about ways of loving yourself in an environment that hates you. In that, you will learn ways to do it so that you can come away from bullying with a healthy self-esteem.

Once you learn all about this life-saving information, you will be able to come through any abuse with minimal damage to your mental health and move on to a happy and productive life.

This post is all about loving yourself in an environment that hates you so that you can come through bullying with your confidence, self-esteem, and mental health intact.

Loving Yourself in an Environment that Hates You

People constantly bombarding you with ugly names, cruel taunts and attacks, even for a short time, makes life harder than it should be.

Moreover, after a long period of time, it can have a cumulative and devastating effect on your self-esteem. And if you aren’t careful, you too will begin to believe the cruel falsehoods that mean-spirited bullies tell you.

Nevertheless, no matter how viciously others may treat you, it’s imperative that you do everything possible to hold on to self-love. Why? Because loving yourself is the most important thing you can ever do for yourself.

Here are ways to keep loving yourself when everyone bullies you.

1. Make positive affirmations every day, several times a day.

In other words, look at yourself in the mirror each morning and say these words to yourself:

  • “I AM a good person.”
  • “I AM worthy of being loved.”
  • “I AM beautiful.”
  • “I AM important.”
  • “I AM smart.”

The more you give yourself positive affirmations, the more they will stick and the more you’ll believe it even if others try to bring you down. This is how you shield your precious mind from bullies who wish to destroy it.

Understand that you must do what you must do to maintain your self-esteem. Never let anyone brainwash you into thinking that you are less than.

You must love and respect yourself before anyone else can love and respect you. Also, you must take care of YOU. Therefore, love yourself enough to give yourself compassion when others mistreat you.

2. Loving Yourself in an Environment that Hates You:

Be willing to make difficult, even heartbreaking decisions.

You must command respect and love from others, including toxic family members that you love dearly. And be willing to make some very difficult decisions in order to either receive that love and respect or get rid of toxic people who refuse to give it to you.

Sometimes, you have to walk away for people you love and care about. And you must do it knowing full well that there is always a chance that they may never see your worth.

Moreover, this means coming to a place where you no longer care even the slightest about the outcome.

However, there is a strong chance that your value will go up in that person’s eyes. And they will eventually see your worth and treat you better than you ever thought possible. It may not happen overnight. In fact, it may take up to several years, but it can happen.

But! If by chance, it doesn’t happen, realize that you did not turn your back on the person because you did not love them. You did it only because they did not love you enough to treat you with the love and respect that you know in your heart of hearts that you deserve.

You must love yourself or nobody will love you. Never look outside of yourself for love and validation. Never depend on others for assurance of your value. Let love come from within your heart!

That means loving yourself enough to know when it’s time to let go.

3. Loving Yourself in an Environment that Hates You:

Stop Caring what people think of you.

No lie. This can be hard to do, especially if the people around you hate you and are bullying you. Loving yourself in a room full of people who hate you takes a mountain of hard work.

In other words, it’s real tough to do when all you hear from everyone is:

  • “You aren’t worth a damn!”
  • “You suck!”
  • “You’re a drain on society!”
  • “You’ll never amount to a hill of beans!”

I understand. If you hear that long enough and from enough people, it can break your spirit if you let it. And how you refuse to let it get to you is to see it for what it is- noise pollution!

This is why it’s so important to stop giving a tinker’s damn what anyone thinks of you. At the end of the day, what they think of you doesn’t matter.

Here’s another thing to think about. The weight a person’s opinions carry depends on their relationship with you. In other words, you give the most value to the opinions of the people who are closest to you. The ones who love and care for you.

However, the opinions of those who are out to hurt you carry the least weight. Therefore, you don’t have to place in value on the opinions of enemies, bullies, and haters.

To get offended by someone’s opinion, you must first value their opinions. Therefore, don’t give any value to things that have none.

In other words, refuse to let the incendiary remarks of a bully get to you.

4. Give yourself permission to be yourself.

That means be the authentically beautiful person you were born to be. Moreover, do it even if others don’t like it. Understand that most people are fake and they won’t like it when you relax and be yourself. Why? Because you’re their complete opposite.

Also, giving yourself permission to be yourself means knowing it’s okay to have needs, wants, and desires. Moreover, it’s okay to express those desires.

Other people might ridicule or reprimand you for asking for what you want. However, pay these people no mind and just do your thing. They’ll get over it eventually.

5. Loving Yourself in an Environment that Hates You:

Train your inner voice to speak lovingly to you.

You do this through practice and patience. If that inner critic starts putting you down, catch it when it happens. Then turn the negative words into words of love.

Therefore, when you do this for long enough, that voice will begin to love you unconditionally.

6. Stop comparing yourself to others.

Understand that we’re all on different paths. Some have smooth paths and others paths are rougher. However, never compare your life with theirs.

Look for the blessings in your life and be proud of who you are.

7. Give yourself permission to walk away from drama.

When bullies begin running their mouths, sometimes it’s best to just walk away and leave them standing there. Understand that you have a right not to deal with drama.

Moreover, expect your bullies to ridicule you for choosing to remove yourself. They may accuse you of being to scared to face them. However, know that it’s not out of fear that you do so, it’s out of smarts and self-care.

Therefore, realize that it’s okay to leave if you’re in an environment where you aren’t valued.

8. Loving Yourself in an Environment that Hates You:

Allow yourself to make mistakes and learn from them.

Everyone makes mistakes. However, not everyone has bullies who constantly shame them for it or remind them of past errors.

This is proof that your mistakes are no worse than the ones others make. Your bullies may make it seem like they are. But they aren’t. Therefore, you’re no worse than anyone else.

Continue to love and value yourself anyway, despite what others may say or think.

9. Know that it’s okay if people get angry with you.

In other words, if people get angry at you for taking care of yourself, that’s your cue that they don’t deserve to be in your life and you should ditch these creeps and move on.

Don’t let their anger discourage you from doing what’s best for yourself. Because you’re the only one who must live your life. Therefore, make your life the best life you can make it.

And to hell with what anyone else thinks!

10. Realize that you can’t control how others think, feel, or behave.

Another person’s behavior is beyond your control. Therefore, give up the urge to control the way others act toward you. Why? Because it’s impossible and it’s a waste of your time and energy.

You can never control how others view you. Moreover, you can’t control what people say to you and how they act toward you.

However, what you can control is how you behave. In other words, you can control how you respond to the behavior of bullies and other idiots who try to steal your joy.

And, most importantly, you have a choice whether to keep associating with these losers and keep them in your life. Therefore, give them the boot if possible.

You don’t need them around.

11. Loving Yourself in an Environment that Hates You:

See your bullies’ drivel for what it is – a bunch of noise!

Loving yourself in the face of bullying is revolutionary!

Therefore, you must drown out all the hot air and noise pollution your bullies emit. And you must see it for what it is. How do you do that?

  •  You do it by seeing your bullies for the creeps they truly are.
  • You do it by understanding where all their vitriol comes from.
  • Also, you do it by thinking good thoughts of yourself and reminding yourself of your good qualities.
  • And you do it by reminding yourself what a bunch of pathetic losers your bullies truly are.

Therefore, keep training your brain to think highly of yourself, even when nobody else thinks lowly of you. It’s the greatest act of rebellion against bullies!

Again, see it for what it is. The judgements and verbal abuse you consistently hear from the cowardly creeps around you, is nothing but a bunch of racket. In other words, it’s noise pollution!

When you’re determined like yourself when others don’t, you refuse to let bullies get into your head.

Moreover, you train your brain to filter out the negative comments that serve no purpose but to damage your self-esteem. Also, you silence that inner critic that would otherwise nag you night and day.

And here’s the best part! When you love and accept yourself, others outside the bullying environment will likely accept you. In other words, strangers who have no history with you will be inclined to also love and accept you.

No, your bullies and abusers won’t like or love you even if you love yourself. But who cares about them?

Therefore, you must love yourself in spite of what others think of you. You will be surprised at how it protects your self-esteem. When you work to feel good about yourself, even while bullies are trying to tear you down, it will work as a buffer to the psychological attacks they launch.

You may come out of it bruised, but not broken.

Loving Yourself in an Environment that Hates You:

Learn to Love the Person You’re Stuck with For Life- You!

There’s no getting away from it, bucko! You can never run from yourself. You are confined to yourself and will take this person with you wherever you go.

Therefore, would you rather be stuck for the rest of your life with someone you love or someone you hate?

This post was all about the importance of loving yourself in an environment that hates you so that you’ll be able to buffer yourself against the attacks of bullies.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Raising Self-Esteem: 5 Easy Mind Hacks that Help

2. When You Start Seeing Your Worth, 17 Amazing Changes Happen.

3. Never Chase People Who Don’t See Your Worth

4. How to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem

5. How to Have Self-Respect: 7 Powerful Ways to Treat Yourself Well

benefits of self-love meditation

Benefits of Self-Love: 13 Reasons to Love Yourself No Matter What

‘Want to know the benefits of self-love so that you’ll be compelled to practice it and better your life? Here are all the reasons to love yourself in any situation.

benefits of self-love

Many times, you may have allowed bullying to shoot down your confidence. Moreover, you’ve heard critical and debasing voices of the people around you when you were growing up.

Moreover, they conditioned you to take it as truth. You were an innocent person who ended up internalizing the bad stuff that happened to you. Even worse, you mistook them as confirmation that you’re unlovable.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all the benefits of self-love and why it’s so important that you love yourself.

Once you learn all about this life-changing information, you will be more inclined to begin practicing self-love so that you can take back your power and change your life for the better.

This post is all about the benefits of self-love to let you know that once you begin to love yourself, life can only get better.

Benefits of Self-Love

When people bully you from everywhere, they will often try to convince you that you’re no good and that no one should love you. Moreover, they may use your past mistakes to convince you that you should hate yourself. But, listen up!

You must realize that the devil is the author of lies and a good liar always uses the past to convince you that their lies are the truth. They tell you that you’re unworthy, that you’re bad, that you’ll never amount to a hill of beans.

However, understand that it’s all lies.

You must Love the person you’re stuck with.

I’m not a shrink. I’m not even a mental health professional. However, what I’m suggesting here is just common sense. Wouldn’t it make sense to love the only person you’re stuck with 24/7, rather than to hate them? Sure, it would.

Therefore, it’s so important that you don’t let bullies convince you to hate yourself. Never let someone else use you as their personal toxic waste dump. Never allow yourself to be a dumping ground for their baggage.

I won’t kid you here. It won’t be easy, and it won’t happen overnight. It’s going to take a lot of inner work and you will have to invest a lot of time and energy at first.

Moreover, there will be times when your mind will fight against you. You fall short but get back up and keep at it! It will be so worth it in the end. Know that YOU are worth it!

Again, learn to love the one person you’re stuck with. Love the one person you can never, even for a second, get away from- yourself!

Therefore, love the person you’re stuck with!

Benefits of Self-Love:

Self-love isn’t selfish.

 Here is the difference between self-love and selfishness.

Self-love is caring for yourself without taking advantage of other people. Selfishness, on the other hand, involves taking something from others without caring about them.

Therefore, self-love isn’t selfish, it’s essential! It’s a must for your health. And when you suffer bullying, it’s a brave act of rebellion. In fact, it’s a revolutionary act when bullies have turned everyone against you.

If you don’t love yourself no matter your circumstances, it can have negative consequences later. So, it’s so important that you do! And do it no matter how others feel about it.

Granted, this is easier said than done, especially when you’re a target of relentless bullying. It takes a conscious effort and a lot of work to keep their garbage from affecting your mental health. But realize that you’re worth the investment. I promise you.

And if it gets overwhelming, there’s nothing wrong with seeking therapy. We all need a little help sometimes. Also, there’s nothing wrong with leaving the environment either. Do whatever you must do to preserve your peace.

If you choose the first option, know that it doesn’t mean you’re “mentally imbalanced.” Therefore, realize that ignorant people tell you these things to make you seem that way. Why? Because it helps them to distract others from their own mental and emotional issues.

If you choose the latter, know that you’re not running away. You’re removing yourself from a bad place that’s no good for you. That’s not being chicken or wimping out. It’s called self-care.

And naturally, when you love someone, you’ll protect and take care of them. Therefore, take care of yourself.

What are the benefits of self-Love?

1. You treat your mind and body better.

In other words, you treat them with care and respect. You feed your body what it needs. You minimize the junk food in your diet. Moreover, you exercise to make your body stronger.

Also, you go on nature walks and spend time outside rather than shutting yourself inside the house all day. There’s nothing like being outdoors and enjoying some sunlight and a cool breeze. You’d be surprised at how much better it makes you feel.

It means feeding your mind as well- reading personal development books (or a good mystery novel), meditating, and praying.

Most importantly, it means you stop criticizing yourself and listening to that toxic voice that says you’re not good enough. You might not completely get rid of your inner critic, but you won’t give it nearly as much airtime as you once did.

So, fall in love with yourself and break up with the voices that tell you that you’re not worthy. Banish them forever because those voices are nasty.

They’re old, stale, and they stink like yesterday’s trash! Moreover, they’ve been telling you the same worn out lies for years. You’d think we’d get bored hearing the same old crap from them after so long.

Therefore, instead of listening to the voice of that nasty inner bully, replace it with a voice of love. Anything else is just noise pollution!

This is how you prioritize your physical and mental well-being.

2. You don’t worry about mistakes.

When you love yourself fully and completely, you allow yourself to make mistakes and use them to learn and grow.

3. Benefits of Self-Love:

You only apologize when it’s necessary.

In other words, you don’t give apologies for things that don’t warrant them. No. You only allow yourself to apologize when appropriate.

Put simpler, you won’t be sorry for being yourself, nor the way you feel. And, anyone who tells you otherwise, you’ll only blow them off with a “whatever” and keep it moving.

4. You embrace your flaws.

You’ll embrace the imperfections you cannot change and improve on the ones you can.

5. You only accept healthy relationships.

You give your time and energy to only people who truly love you and want best for  you. Why? Because you realize that they are the only people who matter.

Moreover, you’ll feel more worthy of healthier people and let go of the people who use, abuse, and neglect you.

6. You believe in yourself.

You’re a go-getter and begin going after your dreams. Why? Because you truly believe you can achieve them. Moreover, you believe you’re worthy of success and that nothing short of an act of God can stop you.

7. Benefits of Self-Love:

Toxic people will disappear from your life.

In other words, toxic people will avoid you like the plague. Why? Because they won’t want to mess with you. On the other hand, healthy people will be drawn to you like a magnet.

Why? Because the high quality people will sense the love within you and treat you with love and respect. Even your finances and lifestyle will go up!

8. You’re open to learning new things.

You’ll invite positive changes by learning, improving, and growing. You won’t change who you are but only become a better version of yourself. Moreover, you’ll enjoy your journey to self-betterment.

9. You stop settling for crappy treatment.

Understand that we accept what we think we deserve out of life. If you loathe yourself, you’ll accept drama in your life and toxic relationships. Therefore, you’ll stay in environments that aren’t good for you.

You’ll allow people to wipe their feet all over you and you’ll lose sight of your goals and dreams. In short, you’ll settle for less. As a result, you’ll get even less than what you settle for.

On the other hand, once you begin loving yourself, you stop settling for shoddy treatment. Moreover, you distance yourself from people who mean you no good.

In getting rid of toxic people, you stop treating yourself badly.

10. Benefits of Self-love:

You do the things that make you feel alive.

For example, you might go for a walk on a warm spring morning. Maybe you love sitting in your backyard swing and watching the sunrise. Or, you might spend the day lying on the beach.

Also, you may have projects you enjoy, like writing or playing music. Whatever makes you feel good, do it! Do everything that feeds your heart and soul!

11. You look for the glimmers.

Glimmers are the opposite of triggers. They’re those tiny, beautiful, but fleeting moments that make you feel safe, happy and calm. Glimmers instantly fill you with hope! And the best part is that they’re so easy to find. They’re everywhere!

Therefore, if you look for the glimmers, you’ll find more and more of them. For example, watching a shooting star can be a glimmer. A cool breeze on a warm spring day is a glimmer.

Other things like seeing fireflies at night or watching the leaves change colors during Autumn are glimmers. Therefore, learn to look for the glimmers in life and you’ll soon see them all the time!

And, believe it or not, they can help you heal from bullying and other traumas. So, catch every glimmer you possible can!

12. You reduce depression and anxiety.

Self-love automatically reduces depression and anxiety. Why? Because, when you love yourself, you don’t concern yourself with other people’s opinions. Put another way, you could care less what people think of you, good or bad.

But wait! Here’s another thing! You don’t worry as much about outcomes either. You’re more willing to go with the flow and let the chips fall where they may.

Therefore, you’re much calmer and more relaxed.

13. Benefits of Self-Love:

You Improve Your Self-Esteem.

Self-love helps you feel confident and to have more respect for yourself. And when you’re confident, you’re more likely to meet new people and make friends.

Moreover, self-love is a good motivator. It motivates you to do the work required to improve yourself and your situation.

Self-love can bring you so many benefits. So, why not begin practicing it today?

This post was all about the benefits of self-love to motivate you to begin loving yourself so that you can cash in on those benefits!

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How to Build Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem

2. Bullying and Self Confidence: 7 Steps to Keeping Your Confidence Up When People Bully You

3. Benefits of Setting Boundaries

4. Benefits of Positive Thinking: 6 Positive Changes You’ll See

5. When You Start Seeing Your Worth, 17 Amazing Changes Happen.

Know Your Worth As a Woman: 5 Rules to Live by

Do you know what it means to know your worth as a woman? Here are rules you should live by to increase your value.

know your worth as a womanWhen you know your worth as a woman, you’re least likely to settle for anything less than what you want and what you know you deserve.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn what it is to know your worth as a woman. Moreover, you’ll live by your beliefs and convictions so that you can increase your value and live the life you deserve.

Once you know this life-changing information, you will successfully increase your feminine value. Moreover, you’ll be more capable of creating the good life you deserve because you won’t settle for crap.

This post is all about what it is to know your worth as a woman so that you can know your true value and live up to it.

Know Your Worth as a Woman

A high-value woman is worth more than gold. However, with the moral decline of today’s females, she’s a rare commodity. Even so, potential partners still hope to find her.

First, here’s a scenario. A fourteen-year-old girl comes home from school to find both her grandmother’s sitting at the kitchen table.

Having both grown up during the Great Depression and been daughters of farmers, the grandmothers only have fifth-grade and seventh-grade educations, yet they are geniuses in common sense and street smarts!

As they sit together, sipping coffee and having just finished a card game, the girl’s maternal grandmother tells her the story of how her grandfather cheated on her many times but only dropped the other woman in the end.

She also tells her how she ended up divorcing him. After she tells her the story. Her sweet grandmas then give her 5 Rules all women should live by.

Rule Number 1

“Never, ever have an affair with a married man because you only settle for second place when you do, sweetheart. You decrease your value as a woman when you go with another woman’s husband”

“In other words, you cheapen yourself. Wouldn’t you rather find your own husband and be his one and only?”

Naturally, the young girl’s answer is an emphatic “YES!”

Know Your Worth as a Woman:

Her maternal grandmother continued:

“When a woman dates a married man, she decreases her worth as a woman- and she does it immensely. She reduces herself to the lowest common denominator.”

“Moreover, she lives on the fantasy and false promise that the man will leave his wife for her. In most cases, he doesn’t. She only waits, with bated breath, wasting her valuable time on someone who doesn’t deserve her love let alone his wife’s.”

“Philanderers don’t change. And if he does leave his wife and marries the mistress, he’ll only eventually cheat on her too. When you have an affair with a married man, you sell yourself short. You set yourself up for a huge letdown later. Therefore, you must choose someone who isn’t already committed and who you can call your own.”

“That’s right.” the girl’s paternal grandmother agreed. Then she began to speak.

Rule Number 2

“And never ever throw herself at a man, or worse- crawl up behind someone who doesn’t want you. I see a lot of young girls in your age group doing this and the only thing it does is make them look desperate.”

“Moreover, the guys they chase only get an ego rush from it, them sit back with the buddies and laugh at the girl behind her back. Now, I know you haven’t begun dating yet, but I want to let you know now, so that you’ll avoid these pitfalls when you do begin to date.”

As the girl’s paternal grandmother, a widow, spoke her words, she listened attentively and the maternal grandmother nodded in agreement as she looked at the young girl with those beautiful, wide, but serious eyes.

Now before I go on, I realize that times have changed since I was a young girl and that I may offend a few people out there who may accuse me of using stereotypical gender roles and such. However, the girl in the story was I and this is the conversation we had.

Therefore, for those of you who are thinking about sending me a flamer about how “politically incorrect” this post sounds and that I should be more “gender neutral,” do not!

Know Your Worth as a Woman:

Don’t listen to the in things of today, listen to your heart.

Don’t waste both your time and mine by trying to “school” me on the unwritten rules of identity politics because I’m not interested! This post isn’t about identity politics.

What it is about is knowing your worth as a woman and a person. Also, it’s about the importance of self-value, which, sadly, is in short supply in people these days.

Getting back to the subject, my grandmothers sure knew what they were talking about. They were two of the smartest and socially savviest women I knew. God rest their souls, I considered them life-geniuses! They were both masters at human nature and the hidden motivations and intentions of people!

Our little talk really made an impression on me that day. I never forgot that conversation and continued to live by it.

Know Your worth as a Woman:

Rule Number 3

You must value yourself. Therefore, my point to the above story is that no matter what relationship you choose, heterosexual, homosexual, or otherwise, you should always know your worth. You should value yourself enough not to even begin a relationship with someone who’s already taken. Know that there are always better options.

I say this not to judge anyone, but to convince you to see that you’re worth so much more than you think. In other words, you’re worth so much more than being a side-partner to some creepy toad who doesn’t value women.

The same goes for men who have affairs with married women or settle for fem-toads who either don’t value them or who cheat on them. You must start treating yourselves better!

When you date someone who’s already in a marriage or committed relationship, you set yourself up to play second fiddle. To be okay with lapping up someone else’s sloppy seconds? Yuck! Why would anyone settle for that pathetic crap?

Here’s something else I’ll bet you haven’t thought of. If you have an affair with someone else’s romantic partner, you might as well be wearing their underwear! Egads!

Rule Number 4

Don’t settle. In other words, don’t be okay with someone who wants to only shack up with you!

Know Your Worth as a Woman:

The Value of a Wedding Band

Too many women these days don’t value themselves like they should, especially women who have suffered past bullying and abuse. And many predatory men will take advantage.

Take it from someone who made that mistake when she was young and naive. Shacking up isn’t what it’s cracked up to be.

A woman who prefers marriage over living together knows her value and isn’t afraid of making it clear what she wants out of life. She is confident and a man who is worth her time will respect her and be willing to commit his life to her and make her his wife.

In no way am I telling people how to live. If you’d rather live together than to be married, then that’s your business and I won’t judge you for it. And there are couples who live together and eventually marry but that’s a rare occurrence these days.

Know that you’re worthy of so much more.

If a man wants you to live with him but doesn’t want to marry, how much does he actually think of you? Really think about it.

He expects you to cook, clean, and go to bed with him every night, and yet, he doesn’t think enough of you to make it official? Remember that you teach people how to treat you by what you accept. Seriously, don’t you think you deserve better?

Rule Number 5

Don’t be afraid to go after the relationship you want.

Don’t be like the woman in the video!

Know Your Worth as a Woman:

Don’t settle for anything less than what you deserve.

There are reasons why marriage is so much better than shacking up

1. There’s much more security.

Marriage is more legally binding than living together ever will be. Understand that people who marry make much more of a commitment to their partners than those who only live together.

2. There are higher levels of trust between partners.

The average couple who is married trusts each other more than the average couple who lives together outside marriage. I know that many will counter me with statistics of a high divorce rate. However, this should not deter you from getting married if that’s what you want.

When my husband and I were dating and the subject came up, I made it absolutely clear that the only man I would even consider living with would be the man I married. I knew what I wanted, and I didn’t fear speaking up about it.

Moreover, Mike loved and respected me for it. He thought a lot more of me, and eventually, he asked me to marry him. And the real kicker is that the first few times he asked, I said no because I wasn’t ready yet.

But he never gave up and eventually, I said yes.

3. Know Your Worth as a Woman:

Know your value. You are not free neither are you cheap.

There’s an old saying that was popular when I was growing up and it pertained to the attitudes of those who didn’t want the responsibility of marriage but wanted the perks of it:

“Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?”

Nothing is free. There’s always a price in some way, shape, or form.

If I perform the duties of a wife, then I’m damn sure going to have the title. If I’m going to wash some guy’s dirty underwear, clip his toenails, or wash his funky feet when he’s sick and cannot do it himself, you can believe I’m going to do it with a marriage certificate and a wedding band.

When two people are truly in love, the chances are high that they will marry.

Realize that you have value. If you want marriage and your boyfriend doesn’t want to step up to the plate after you’re together for a few years, then let him go.

It won’t be easy, but don’t be afraid to walk away if your guy isn’t emotionally mature enough for marriage. Then you can make room for a man who deserves you. Understand that you deserve to be a wife, not a forever girlfriend.

Know Your Worth as a Woman:

Don’t be afraid to walk away from emotionally immature partners.

Therefore, love yourself enough to walk away from a man of low quality. Value yourself enough to wait for a high-quality man who deserves you and who wants your hand in marriage. You’re worth it, don’t you think?

http://www.thebridalbox.com/articles/benefits-of-marriage_0051522/

http://www.thelist.com/41041/surprising-benefits-married/

If you don’t learn to value and be true to yourself, how do you expect a potential partner to value and be true to you?

You value yourself by getting absolutely clear on what you will not settle for and what you won’t tolerate. Also, you value yourself by avoiding such partners who are known for cheating on their significant others.

You also value yourself by avoiding any toxic person, commanding respect, and being selective of friends and even choosier of dating and romantic partners.

Know that you deserve so much more. You deserve to be one and only in someone’s life and that should be non-negotiable. Anything less than that is unacceptable!

This post was all about what it means to know your worth as a woman so that you can start treating yourself better and going after what you know you deserve.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Why is Self Acceptance Important? 21 Must-Know Reasons

2. How to Have Self-Respect: 7 Powerful Ways to Treat Yourself Well

3. Lack of Boundaries: 15 Signs You Need to Get Some

4. Be Happy Be Yourself: 3 Benefits You Reap When You Stop Caring What Others Think

5. Knowing Yourself: Why it’s the First Step in Building Confidence

self-acceptance

Why is Self Acceptance Important? 21 Must-Know Reasons

Sadly, many people go through life without self-acceptance. But why is self-acceptance important?

why is self-acceptance important

You may have heard the term “self-acceptance” many times before and may be asking yourself, “Why is self-acceptance important?” Moreover, you may not even know what it is.

Here you will learn the definition of if, why it’s important, and how you can achieve it in order to better your life.

Once you learn all these important details and put them to use, your confidence will soar and you’ll finally be able to take more control of your life and it’s trajectory.

This post will give you the answers to the question, “Why is self-acceptance important?” so that you can reap the benefits of it and reclaim your personal power.

Why is self-acceptance important?

Again, there are many reasons. However, first, lets discuss exactly what self-acceptance is and how it relates to bullying and it’s victims.

Anyone who has ever been bullied will tell you that it sometimes takes years to overcome the after-affects, get completely comfortable with yourself and find happiness.

Because of the torment they suffer, victims often withdraw and become shy. Moreover, the shyness can last a lifetime if they aren’t careful.

This reserved condition often comes from not only fear, but a lack of self-acceptance. Shyness is painful. Therefore, self-acceptance is the most important gift you can ever give yourself.

Here are the reasons that self-acceptance is so important.

1. you can see your own beauty.

A lack of self-acceptance blinds you to your own individual beauty. Therefore, once you accept yourself for all that you are, you will easily see your beauty and every good quality you have. You will then relax and just be.

2. you give yourself permission to make mistakes.

You realize that everyone screws up, including yourself. Therefore, you’re okay with making errors. You may not necessarily like goofing on a project, or singing off key. However, you’re still okay with the blunders you make throughout your life simply because everyone else does it too.

Moreover, you won’t try so hard to be perfect because you realize that perfection is impossible for anyone to reach. So, you’re able to just relax and go with the flow.

3. Why is self-acceptance important? You feel free to express yourself.

The reason many victims of bullying don’t practice self-expression is because they’re afraid that others won’t approve. In other words, they spend too much time worrying about what other people think or what they’ll say.

Therefore, they live in an invisible prison they don’t know how to escape from. The prison of whether they get other people’s approval. What they don’t realize is that they don’t need approval from anyone else.

However, when you express yourself, you don’t feel restricted. Therefore, you feel free to express yourself and aren’t the least bit concerned with what the people around you might think about it.

Why? Because you know that you don’t need the approval of others to live your truth and be who you are.

4. You feel free to be yourself.

In other words, you know you don’t need to try and be someone you aren’t. You don’t have to put on a big front to impress others. You’re completely comfortable in your own skin and as discussed in number three, you express yourself more freely.

Moreover, when you can be yourself, you’re relaxed, calm, and content with who God made you to be.

5. You accept all your flaws.

Why? Because you realize that everyone has imperfections. Therefore, you understand that you’re no different and you’re fine with it.

In other words, you accept all parts of yourself, the good and the not so good.

6. Why is self-acceptance important? You’re not afraid to display all your talents, gifts, and natural abilities.

Though others may criticize you for it, mostly out of jealousy, you keep showing what you can do best. Moreover, you’re not concerned with the way people may feel about it.

Sure. You like to display your natural gifts before others, but you do it because you enjoy it and not to impress anyone.

7. You feel free to have your own opinions, feelings, and beliefs.

In other words, you’re not afraid to voice those opinions. In today’s world, being an individual and having your own opinions is of the utmost importance.

Why? Because now more than ever, society frowns on differences of opinions and beliefs.  Agreeing to disagree is, sadly, becoming more and more out of date with the majority of people attacking those with differences in thought, taste, and opinion.

Understand that no two people are going to agree on everything. That’s why you must have the courage to have your own beliefs and convictions even if it causes others discomfort.

8. you work on getting to know yourself better.

You can begin keeping a journal and writing in it everyday. Also, you can take a few courses and try new things. These are a few ways to get to know yourself better.

9. You’re not afraid to grow, learn, and try new things.

Learning and trying new things brings growth. Moreover, it’s also exciting! Therefore, never stop learning, no matter how old you get. Because, when you stop learning, you become stagnant.

10. Why is self-acceptance important? Because You’re more likely to face your fears head-on.

Self-acceptance takes courage. Moreover, when you accept yourself, flaws and all, you’re more likely to take risks.

Risk taking is important because it brings you out of your comfort zone. And when you step out of your comfort zone and put yourself out there, amazing things happen!

11. you discover talents and abilities you never thought you had.

When you accept yourself, you’re more willing to try new things. And when you try new things, you’ll find those hidden natural gifts and abilities. Also, you’ll have the patience to practice them and the courage to show them to others.

12. You believe in yourself.

In other words, you believe that you can succeed at what you set out to do. You have confidence in yourself and are much less afraid to take on projects and tasks.

Moreover, you’ll be more confident in tackling anything life throws your way. Why? Because you know that you’re strong and that you’ll triumph over it.

13. Why is Self-Acceptance Important? Because You’re not afraid to set goals, work on those goals, and pursue your dreams.

People who accept themselves have goals to work toward and dreams to fulfill. They’re usually so busy that they don’t have time to worry about what others think and seek approval.

Therefore, accept yourself and be too busy doing you! This will only bring you success and happiness down the road if you don’t give up.

14. You practice self-care.

When you accept yourself, you love yourself. And when you love yourself, you’re more likely to take care of your body. In other words, you’ll make sure you eat right and exercise everyday.

Also, you’ll get plenty of rest at night and see the doctor if you get sick.

You will take care of your mental health as well. Moreover, you’ll do this by protecting your peace from bullies, abusers, and other toxic people.

15. You’re not afraid to set boundaries nor to enforce them if you need to.

In other words, you don’t put up with bad behavior from anyone. Again, you’ll protect your mental health by keeping toxic people out of your life and protecting your peace.

Moreover, you’re not afraid to set boundaries and call out anyone who verbally abuses you. And you aren’t afraid to walk away from people who take advantage of your goodness or get abusive with you.

16. Why is self-acceptance important? When you accept yourself, new opportunities and better situations open up for you.

You’ll think that the floodgates of heaven have suddenly opened and you are being washed away in a river of blessings.

In other words, your relationships will improve and you’ll suddenly begin attracting better people into your life. You’ll make new friends and associates.

Moreover, other opportunities will come through these new people, such as great jobs, careers, and travel.

17. You’re not afraid to show your silly side and have fun.

In fact, you’ll enjoy having fun and goofing off a little. Also, the people around you will enjoy it too because you’ll be a fun person to be around!

18. You’re better able to have compassion and empathy for others.

The prerequisite to loving others is to love yourself and that takes self-acceptance.

If you can’t accept yourself, you won’t be able to accept others either. This is why a lot of people become bullies and most bullies haven’t achieved self-acceptance.

Being a bully doesn’t score any points. Moreover, it doesn’t make bullies feel any better in the long run. Sure, they may feel better about themselves the instant they put someone else down.

However, that feeling won’t last long. In fact, it fades rather quickly. They’ll then need to attack someone else to get that fix and it will only make them look like insecure little cowards.

But when you accept yourself, you don’t worry about the opinions of others and are better able to give love and compassion to the people around you. Even better, you won’t feel the need to bully anyone.

Therefore, work on changing the way you see yourself and begin loving yourself more.

 Only then will you be able to properly love others.

19. Why is self-acceptance important? Your personal relationships improve.

Because you accept yourself, you accept others. You love yourself and give the same to others. This can only improve your personal relationships.

People love those who love them and they accept those who accept them. Therefore, your relationships can only get better, not worse.

20. You’re social life improves.

You become much more attractive to people and they are drawn to you like a magnet. And the individuals who are waiting for you to mess up actually get bored, give up and stop watching you. I know this from experience. Acceptance of self (all aspects) is such sweet freedom!

No one likes to be around a self conscious and insecure person with a victim-mentality who doesn’t like themselves.

Again, when you accept yourself, others will too.

21. You find peace and happiness.

Self-acceptance is one of the main stepping stones to happiness. When you accept yourself as you are, quirks and all, you release yourself from the enslavement of others’ approval. Moreover, you stop concerning yourself with how others see you.

In that, you lift a huge weight off your shoulders. This brings peace and happiness into your life.

This post is all about the importance of self-acceptance and the amazing life-changes it brings.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Benefits of Positive Thinking: 6 Positive Changes You’ll See

2. The Advantages of Having Enemies: 7 Powerful Positives

3. Secrets Bullies Hope You Never Find Out: 11 Must-Know Facts about Bullies

4. Knowing Yourself: Why it’s the First Step in Building Confidence

5. Setting Boundaries: 3 Powerful Practices to Hold Your Ground

What Babies Can Teach Us About Confidence

Babies are so adorable! They have that charm and innocence that no other age group has. They don’t worry about what others think of them and they never try to impress others. These little darlings display sweetness, purity, complete authenticity, and hearts of gold.

Babies have not a care in the world what people think of them. They have no inhibitions whatsoever. They’re not afraid to cry and express their wants and needs. You can see it in the way little toddlers shamelessly coo, laugh, babble, skip, run, and dance. And they’ll do it in front of anyone. These little sweeties are fearless. They’re not afraid to show their emotions, express their thoughts, show their creativity.

Furthermore, their precious little souls are completely open. They give, share, and receive love with an open and grateful heart. They love being loved and doted on and will receive it with a soft coo or laugh.

Everything starts with self-love and babies are a perfect example of it.

Sadly, as time passes and these babies grow bigger, the ways of people and the world slowly and incrementally taint their little hearts. Many grow up in toxic environments and with parents who excessively criticize and abuse them.

Therefore, they build a protective wall around themselves to try and keep the contamination out. Because family members and others discount, ridicule, even punish them for their feelings, they learn to mask those feelings. They collect emotional baggage as they become preschoolers, school-aged kids, then teenagers, and finally, adults.

Also, many are raised by drug-addicted, mentally ill, and neglectful adults and they build walls to protect themselves from that as well. Therefore, many must learn to raise themselves.

None of us have low self-esteem and lack of confidence at birth. Either ell-meaning family members who wish to keep us humble and sweet, instill those characteristics in us or bullies and abusers force-fed them to us.

Consequently, many adults will cause a baby to grow up thinking that they are unlovable. They don’t feel they deserve to have their wants and needs met. Thus, they grow up filled with either anger and self-loathing, or sadness and depression.

Life Has Ways of Eroding That Confidence and Goodness We Were Born With.

We all go through these terrible changes, even those who aren’t bullied. Only few people in this world manage to keep that confidence and joy they were born with. Furthermore, life’s disappointments, hurts, and heartaches have ways of doing these things to all of us. However, the worse changes happen to targets of bullying and abuse.

They stop expressing emotions and give up asking for anything. Why? Because sometime during their childhoods, other people conditioned them. They conditioned them to think that they’re self-centered and wrong for ever needing or wanting anything out of life.

Therefore, they resign themselves to the attitude that, things are “just the way they are” and that there’s nothing they can do to change anything.

Consequently, when you tell them about self-love and how important it is, they wince at the idea because it makes them uncomfortable. But, again, other people program them to think that self-love is somehow self-absorbed and evil. I can relate to this because, when I was thirteen and fourteen years old, I did the exact same when I was first told about the idea of self-love and self-care.

The thought of looking at myself in the mirror every day and telling myself “I love you” or “You’re beautiful,” “You’re Smart,” “You’re awesome,” etc., felt both weird. In fact, it felt downright sickening because I was under the impression that it was all a sign of sheer vanity.

It’s Sad When People Can Successfully Condition You to Believe that Self-love is Vanity

Self-love can feel downright painful after you’ve wasted years and decades hating and degrading yourself. After all, it’s not something you’re accustomed to practicing. Anything new and out of the ordinary feels painful at first. Like all things, it must first become a habit. And it can only become habit through rigorous learning and practice.

‘You see? My bullies and a few abusive others sold me on the idea that any form of self-care or self-love was abhorrent and self-serving. I was under the misguided belief that self-degradation and self-criticism was a virtue. It was a sign of being humble and meek. Therefore, I thought that was what normal people did, as I watched a few family members do the same thing.

Some of my family members still do this at times and it breaks my heart. If only they could see, I mean, truly see their value. . In my eyes, their worth is more than that of gold.

The truth is that self-hatred is the equivalent of having a millstone hung from your neck. You drag it around everywhere you go because it’s exhausting. Therefore, it zaps your energy. It takes the magic, wonder, and excitement from your life. And it keeps you stuck and worse, invites more disrespect and abuse from others.

Self-love doesn’t equal Vanity, It equals Virtue!

Self-love can only come from within, never from without. It doesn’t come from a partner, a spouse, or a boatload of friends. It can’t come from a banging body or fancy clothes, hairdos, or makeup. Money can’t buy self-love. Power doesn’t give it to you and neither does prestige. Self-love comes from the heart and only the heart.

Additionally, self-love is about self-acceptance and being perfectly okay with your imperfections. It comes from being comfortable in your own skin and not caring even the slightest what others think or say of you.

In order to find peace and joy in life, self-love is a must-have. It helps you to achieve your goals and realize your dreams and aspirations. It determines your outcomes- whether you succeed or fail. Also, it helps you to better re-frame bad situations and see them as learning experiences. Self-esteem and self-love give you peace of mind.

In a nutshell, self-love gives you complete freedom! It is the key to happiness and joy!

Don’t you think you deserve to be at peace with yourself? Don’t you think you deserve happiness and joy? I do.

So, be like a baby. Love yourself. Know that your true colors are vibrant and never be afraid to show them. Dance like you’ve never been ridiculed. And play like you’ve never fallen and scraped your knee. Express your emotions. Love, laugh, and live.

You’ll be surprised at how everything will change for the better! I promise!

With knowledge comes empowerment!

Bullies May Turn Others Against You but Never Allow Them to Turn You Against You!

No matter what other people may think of you, you are the only one who knows who you truly are. Bullies are known for spinning smear campaigns and witch hunts to turn others against a target because it’s the only way they can make their lies and accusations seem valid. However, no matter how convincing the bullies may be and how many people believe the lies and rumors spread about you, it doesn’t mean the talk is true.

Only you can judge who you really are, nobody else can. I know it’s difficult not to question yourself when it seems that others hate you. Anyone who finds themselves in this situation would ask themselves, “What did I do?” or “What did I say?” It’s only a natural human reaction to being ostracized. It’s difficult not to blame yourself.

But please, for your own self-esteem, do not blame yourself. Remember that the problem lies with the bullies, not with you. You are not responsible for what is happening to you. Believe it!

Although others may turn against you, just make sure that you do not turn against you! Remember that reputation doesn’t equal character!

Continue to love yourself. Continue to take care of yourself and be true to your own heart! Continue to do the things that give you pleasure and surround yourself with those who do love you and want the best for you. Because during this time, you must ‘baby’ your self-esteem and your confidence!

Bullies may turn everyone else against, you! Just don’t allow them to turn you against yourself because you have no reason to hate yourself. So, love yourself even when it seems that others hate you. I promise you that your self-esteem will thank you for it! You will thank yourself for it!

With knowledge comes power!

Being Comfortable In Your Own Skin: What It Means

positive always be yourself

To become comfortable in your own skin, it takes several years and plenty of life lessons and experiences. It takes being knocked down enough times by enough people before you can finally say, enough is enough and choose to be happy.

And when we choose to be happy, despite our imperfections and what others think or say of us, we choose to be truly free! Free from the constraints of longing to fit in- free from the constraints of conformity!

To be comfortable in your own skin means loving and accepting all parts of you- the good, the bad, and the downright ugly.

It means doing what fulfills you and makes you happy.

It means living life on your own terms.

It means refusing to apologize for who you are.

It means allowing yourself to make mistakes and learn from them.

It means refusing to live up to standards and expectations other than your own.

It means making time for hobbies and interests.

It means making time for your family and closest friends.

It means not being afraid to say no or to set boundaries.

It means not being afraid to ask for what you want.

It means following your dreams.

positive free happy hope peace confidence self-esteem

It means working toward your goals.

It means celebrating your successes and accomplishments.

It means not being afraid to ask for help when you need it.

It means being selective of friends and who you spend time with.

It means accepting and embracing differences in people.

It means having empathy and compassion for others.

It means putting yourself and your health first.

It means being realistic with goals and patient with the time it takes to reach them.

It means being present in the moment.

It means knowing your limitations.

It means knowing what you want in life and going after it.

It means being clear on what you will and will not tolerate.

It means loving yourself enough to know when it’s time to walk away.

It means knowing that you’re worthy of respect, love, compassion, friendship, and peace.

Most of all, it means the freedom to be.