Bullying Story: Endurance, Survival, and the Will to Overcome

Here’s a bullying story. It’s a story of not only the will to survive but the will to overcome and begin thriving. Also, it’s a story of healing and re-empowerment.

bullying story

In this post, you will learn what it means to endure bullying, survive it and overcome it through a true bullying story. Also, you will see what life is like through the eyes of a bullying victim and later, a survivor and overcomer.

Once you learn all about these real-life experiences, you will know that you are not alone if you endure the same thing now. Moreover, you will understand that you, too, can overcome and look forward to a rewarding life with friends who truly care for you.

This post shares a bullying story filled with true-life experiences to offer you hope and encouragement.

Bullying Story

I didn’t experience bullying, nothing beyond usual teasing, until I moved to a small Tennessee town after having been an Army Brat and lived in several different areas. Until then, bullying had always been something that happened to kids in the movies.

When I became a target of severe and chronic bullying as a sixth-grader at the age of twelve, I began a long lesson in the human predator/prey dynamic and a battle for my dignity, safety, and my very soul.

During the sixth grade, I never fought back. My family had taught me that decent young ladies didn’t fight. So, I took the physical beatings, name-calling, and abuse. However, what I didn’t realize was that my classmates were growing accustomed to bullying me.

When the Bullying Escalates

When I entered seventh grade at the age of thirteen, the harassment by my classmates reached a fever pitch. The abuse my classmates subjected me to is called “poly-victimization.” They called me names and slandered me. Moreover, they would humiliate me with pranks. When the bullying grew out of control, they began threatening me and physically attacking me.

And after enough of it, I learned the hard way that I had two choices: either take a stand and fight back or get eaten alive. However, it seemed that the more I tried to set boundaries, the worse the bullying became.

The physical bullying was brutal. I suffered horrible beatings, and it escalated to the point of having a box cutter pulled on me and my life threatened.

Every morning before going to school, I would feel a huge lump in my throat and swallow hard. It took everything I had in me to step onto that school bus. Why? Because I knew what would be waiting for me as soon as I walked through the school entrance.

Bullying Story:

Enduring Daily Abuse

During P.E., I excelled at some sports but struggled with others. I loved volleyball and kickball, but basketball and baseball weren’t my strong suits. Music and writing stories were my gifts, not sports.

However, students and a few teachers judged me because I wasn’t an athlete or a member of a sorority. I was musically talented and creative. So, what they were doing was akin to judging a fish on its ability to fly.

In just two short years, I went from being a confident and outgoing kid to one who was sad and withdrawn.  Additionally, I transitioned from a student who consistently made the honor roll to one who earned C’s and D’s.

Schoolwork had always been so easy for me. I had been one of those lucky kids who didn’t have to pick up a book.

All I had to do was listen in class and complete my homework (which I could do in minutes). And I would ace every test. But in a matter of two years, the schoolwork went from being a piece of cake to being complicated and overwhelming.

Who can concentrate on schoolwork when they’re busy looking over their shoulder and dodging bullies? Who can learn effectively when they’re constantly in survival mode?

The Bullying Becomes Unbearable

The torment became next to unbearable. So much so that I attempted suicide at the age of fourteen. As a result, I spent a week in the ICU and almost didn’t make it.

It was a hell I would never wish on anyone, not even my worst enemy. My classmates had stripped me of every ounce of power I had.

Trying to keep a calm demeanor amid so much toxicity and desperately hanging onto my dignity with everything I had was exhausting! It felt as if they were holding me hostage. At times, teachers and a few school staff members would also join in the bullying.

Bullying Story:

When the victim Becomes a Bully

Because I felt powerless, I began to bully those who were even weaker than I was. The reason I did this was to reclaim some of the power bullies had taken from me. This is not something I’m proud of.

There was no one I could turn to. Back then, people considered bullying to be a normal rite of passage. Therefore, I had to deal with it on my own.

Anytime I spoke out about or reported the mistreatment, they shouted me down. The other classmates would tell me to “keep my mouth shut.”

Teachers and school staff blamed me for my own suffering. Other adults labelled me a whiner and ridiculed me because they saw speaking out as a sign of weakness. I received no help or relief.

The Stripping Away of Personhood

They never allowed me to be a human being. Moreover, they gave no margin for error. Instead, they would minimize or ignore any good deeds, accomplishments, and successes. And they would maximize any mistakes.

If I wore a dress and went to class all dolled up, I was trying to either impress people, get a date, or get laid. And if I wore my jeans the slightest bit tight, I looked like a whore.

If I cried, they would accuse me of being too sensitive. But if I laughed, they accused me of trying to get attention. If I became angry, they labelled me mentally unstable. But if I was friendly, I was either flirting or trying to kiss up. If I smiled, I was secretly plotting something devious.

They never allowed me to be myself, and it was exhausting. It felt as if I were suffering a slow and agonizing social murder.

Bullying Story:

The Transfer

The day came when two classmates attacked me from behind when I was four months pregnant with my first child. They threw me over a teacher’s desk, then kicked me as I lay curled in a fetal position on the floor.

All I could do was try to protect my unborn baby by shielding my growing belly with both arms. Luckily, my unborn child survived and came into the world healthy later that year.

After the last attack, I was done with Oakley High. I changed schools, and the bullying stopped. Words cannot tell you the relief I felt when I transferred to a new school! I could finally learn in a safer and less stressful environment!

A Safer Learning Environment.

I loved my new school. And I felt like a bird out of a cage! The feeling was of being released from a nearly six-year-long prison sentence. I had done my time in hell, and now I could put it all behind me. It was then that I began the process of rebuilding my life.

While riding in the car, on the way to my new school, I sat in the passenger seat, next to my then-husband. As he drove, I cried tears of joy.

It was hard to believe that I had finally escaped the persecution! The pain had grown so great I couldn’t even cry! It was all finally over, and I could start a new and better chapter in my life.

Sure enough, I went on to make friends with my new classmates, but more importantly, my grades skyrocketed! The transformation of my grades seemed to happen suddenly and like magic!

After five years, I made the honor roll again and then finally graduated.

I now lead a successful life and use what I went through to help bullied kids today. Anytime I hear of an innocent child bullied into suicide, it truly breaks my heart.

When People Judge Bullying victims who have given up, it makes me cringe.

What’s even more heartbreaking is the attitudes and remarks I hear from others around me when a tragedy like this happens! I often hear statements such as:

  • “But that boy was so quiet!”
  • “Really??? Still waters run deep!”
  • “But that girl always kept to herself!”
  • “No joke! Just as an AIDS patient keeps his diagnosis to himself!”
  • “Shame on him! He was such a coward!”
  • “Right! Anyone running through the woods from a wild boar would look like a coward to someone sitting safely in a tree! You spend a few years being bullied by everyone you know and see how mighty and brave you are! You’ll find out how quickly your life can go to crap!”

If you haven’t experienced it, you’ll never know what it is to be a target of bullying. I was fortunate enough to survive and move on to happiness and success. But many victims don’t, which is why writing about bullying and advocating for victims is my passion.

Bullying Story:

Although being bullied is never a good thing, I did get a few positive takeaways:

  • Having been bullied has made me appreciate the great friends I have today. It also gave me empathy and compassion for others and a desire to help those who endure the same!
  • Having been bullied made a strong woman out of me. It made me more determined never to quit until I reach a goal! Knowing that bullies often bully out of jealousy and fear is the motivation for me.’
  • Being bullied gave me the determination to love myself, put myself first, and the willingness to say “no” anytime I am asked or told to do something that does not feel right!
  • Having been bullied gave me the determination to follow my dreams, to do things I enjoy most, and to achieve success.
  • Having been bullied has given me hope. Because I know that if I can go through bullying and survive, then I can rise above anything!
  • It gave me a soft spot and a great willingness to fight for the underdog.
  • And lastly, it sharpened my BS detector, giving me the ability to read people, spot a bully instantly, and avoid being targeted!

Being a target of bullying almost broke me, yes! But in the end, it made me! Keeping a bullying journal is what saved me. So, I advise you to keep one. Bullying won’t last forever. If you’re a target of bullying and you don’t give up, you too can survive and emerge a winner!

This post was a bullying story to encourage you to keep going when things seem hopeless.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Encouraging Words for Bullying: You Can Overcome!

2. Bullying Journal: 8 Reasons You Should Keep One

3. It Only Gets Better: There is Life After Bullying

male bullying vs female bullying statistics

Male bullying vs Female bullying

‘Want to know the difference between male bullying vs female bullying? Here’s everything you need to know so that you have a better idea of what to expect from bullies of either gender.

male vs female bullying

Regardless of what some may believe, there are noticeable differences in male bullying vs female bullying. Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about those differences.

Once you learn how boys and men bully differently from girls and women, you will be better able to protect yourself from bullying, no matter who it comes from.

This post is all about male bullying vs female bullying, so that you can tailor your self-defense measures to the bully you face.

Male vs female bullying statistics

According to stopbullying.gov, female bullying has a higher prevalence than male bullying, with bullying among females reaching 21.8% while the frequency of male bullying is only 16.7%

Female bullies can be the most vicious. Why? Because they seem to be better at going undetected than male bullies.

Granted, there are always exceptions to this rule. However, this is true for the most part. Male bullies lean more toward outward physical bullying. On the other hand, females prefer psychological and emotional bullying.

Female Bullies

I’ll say again, but more descriptively. Although there are exceptions, most girls and women tend to be passive-aggressive. Therefore, they commit most of their bullying on a psychological level.

However, thanks to radical feminism and the moral decline in today’s females, physical assaults perpetrated by girls and women are increasing at an alarming rate.

The Divide and Conquer Strategy

Females bully by Dividing and Conquering. They like to attack their targets’ relationships. Girls and women use smear campaigns, gossip, rumors, and witch hunts.

Girls and women bully this way to turn everyone against their victims. These shrews may infiltrate the victim’s circle or “warn” strangers about their victim.

If you suffer this kind of bullying, you must know what the intent is. Their end goal is to isolate and alienate you from others and make it difficult for you to make friends.

male bullying vs female bullying:

Females love to use Projection

Females also use projection. In other words, they project all of their own shortcomings onto you. You must understand that bullies, like everyone else, have flaws and imperfections. And their greatest fear is someone, mainly you, exposing those shortcomings.

Therefore, they project their bad behavior onto you.  In other words, they accuse you of the same behavior they are guilty of. You have to admit, it’s one of the best ways for bullies to hide their own evil deeds.

Distraction

These bullies will also use distraction. In other words, they distract others’ attention away from their evil actions by pointing out your reaction to their behavior. They may also point out your negative qualities to keep others from noticing theirs.

Psychological v/s Physical Bullying

Girls and some boys use psychological warfare. Psychological bullying can come in the form of exclusion and dirty looks. Moreover,  taunts, insults, rumors, and lies are also kinds of psychological bullying.

Psychological bullying can even include thievery, invasion of your privacy, and destruction of your property.

Male Bullying vs Female Bullying:

What females do if their psychological bullying isn’t working:

If female bullies discover that their psychological attacks do not work, they may then resort to physical violence. However, if females want to cause you bodily harm, they will more likely persuade someone else to do their violence for them.

For instance, they may send henchmen after you. In other words, they may send a male friend or a bigger and tougher female friend to catch you alone and physically assault you.

Now, you may ask, “But how do they get them to comply? Here’s your answer.

They do it by offering incentives. These girls may promise to give their male friend lots of sex. If they send a tougher female friends, they may promise to provide them with inclusion into their clique. They may also promise her the chance to climb the social ladder.

Lastly, they may also offer them money and material possessions.

Body Shaming

If you are female, people will also use your weight and their appearance as a weapon to cause harm.

Relational Bullying

By primal instinct, females are nurturers. Nature has hardwired girls and women toward maintaining familial, friend, and romantic relationships.

From the time they are small, most young girls dream of one day finding a mate and having children. Why? Again, because they have an instinct to nurture.

Females usually assume the role of caretakers of the family and home. This is why they place the most value on the ability to maintain relationships.

Female bullies aren’t completely clueless. They instinctively know this. Therefore, they will try to sabotage their target girl’s relationships.

Male Bullying vs Female Bullying:

Female Bullies Try to Lower Their Victim’s Prospects for Marriage.

It shouldn’t be any surprise that female bullies love to call their targets names like ‘whore’, ‘slut’, and other names that attack femininity and virtues.

Also, here’s another thing to consider. Anytime you as a young lady are called either one of these names, there is an even deeper meaning behind it. Here’s the hidden meaning.

These bullies are essentially telling you that you aren’t marriageable. They are also trying to tell you that you aren’t worthy of a mate or children. And, therefore, you are not considered to be a whole woman.

Female Bullies Want to Brainwash you.

It’s the truth. This is the reason her attacks are so vicious and repetitive. She wants so badly to convince you that you are worthless. And, she will stop at nothing to make you believe it!

Why? Because she knows that if she can make you believe the lies, there is a strong chance that you will live up to them. We are what we believe.

This bears repeating. Female bullies hope you will live up to the names that they call you. If they call you a whore, what they really want is for you to be one.

A female bully knows that if she could drum it into your head, she will succeed in breaking your spirit. Then, she will succeed in making you prove her right.

So, don’t live up to it! Show her up! However, don’t expect her to give up easily. Girls tend to hang on to their hatred of another girl to the point of obsession.

Their bullying becomes a ritual. And when you stand up to a bully, don’t expect things to get better anytime soon. It usually gets worse before it gets better.

Male Bullying vs Female Bullying:

Females Aren’t Always the Weaker Sex

The reason for this is that girls and women are cunning. They are sneakier with their abuse. Females bully less obviously than females. Therefore, they are much harder to detect.

Compared to males, what females lack in physical strength, they make up for in social intelligence.

Male bullies:

Because nature has hardwired most males to be the hunter and gatherer, guys tend to be more physical. And why not?

Back during prehistoric times, males had to hunt and bring home the food to feed their families. Often, they had to fight off wild animals and human males of other groups to survive.

Although there are exceptions, males are more likely to use physical aggression. Young men are expected to be strong and tough – to display manhood.

Therefore, if the target is another male, the boy bully will not only use his fists, but will also try to feminize their target by repetitively emasculating him.

Male Bullying vs Female Bullying:

Emasculation of Male Targets

Male bullies often call their targets names like “sissy”, “pussy”, “bitch”, and other names that attack maleness. The male bully’s goal is to cause their male victims to feel less like men. Why?

Male bullies aren’t clueless either. They know that if they can make their victims feel impotent, chances are that the bullied male will live up to it.

Therefore, a male bully will try like the devil to strip his victim of manhood. This is also the reason male targets beat up on their victims, especially if the victims are male, because a male who wins a fight is the alpha male.

They know that most females want a strong male partner who will protect and take care of them. They do not want to date a feminized male. In fact, feminized boys and men are complete turn-offs to most girls and women.

Therefore, male bullies will emasculate their victims to lessen their chances of finding a mate. Moreover, they also do it to expand the dating pool for themselves.

If the male victim speaks out against the treatment, other males may ridicule him for it. Moreover, the male bully will trivialize it by referring to him as a crybaby.

People may tell him to “toughen up”, or “man up”. The male bully may also accuse his male victim of going against“man-code” if he dares to report the bullying.

And male bullies who are physically violent usually beat up on males and females. However, there are a few who are so cowardly that they’ll never stand up against another guy but only beat up on girls. These types of male bullies are the most pathetic of all!

Male Bullying vs Female Bullying:

In Closing

If you face a male bully, you will likely endure physical bullying, whether you are male or female. On the other hand, if you face a female bully, you will likely face psychological and emotional bullying. So, tailor your defense accordingly.

This post is all about the differences in male vs female bullying so that you can tailor the best defense for each sex.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Male vs Female Bullying

2. Bullying Statistics Male vs Female: How Males and Females Bully

3. Catty Women: 5 Powerful Ways to Deal with Their Bullying

4. Female Bullies: 7 Reasons They Bully Other Women and Girls

physical bullies at school

Physical Bullies: 9 Secrets You Should Know

‘Want to know secrets of physical bullies. Here are all the secrets they hide so you can use them to your advantage.

physical bullies

They may appear tough. However, physical bullies are the weakest ones of all.

In this post you will learn all the secrets physical bullies don’t want you to know so that you can use them to your advantage.

Once you learn all about these important details, you will feel better about yourself just knowing that you don’t have to result to physical means to get through life.

This post is all about physical bullies and their weaknesses so that you can use them as weapons to protect yourself.

Physical Bullies

The weakest person always uses physical violence. However, the strongest person always uses their brain. It’s also true that the weakest person talks the most and the loudest, but the strongest person gets his message across in few words.

Through experience, I’ve found that these bullies were taught at home that violence is the answer to all their problems. Most of my classmates had the same brutish mentality.

Therefore, if you didn’t give them what they wanted, they resorted to using their fists to force you to comply. Also, they used physical violence any time they felt you weren’t giving them the respect they thought they deserved.

Additionally, bullies like these may even use physical violence to take their frustrations out on you. Whenever they’re in a bad mood, they hold you responsible for it. It’s pathetic really.

But they would never tell you these things!

Here are the secrets they hope you never find out.

1. Physical Bullies are highly insecure with themselves.

Physical violence is weakness. Why? Because people only submit because they don’t the bully to beat them up.

True persuasion is having someone do something for you because they want to do it. Therefore, when people have a choice and they choose to do something you want, it’s so much more rewarding.

Understand that physical bullies see everything as zero-sum. In other words, they feel they either have total control, or none at all. And there’s no in-between.

If they can’t have complete influence, they feel powerless.

2. Physical Bullies:

They compare themselves with others.

Physically violent bullies often compare themselves with others. They see themselves as less effective at persuasion than others.

Therefore, they feel that they’re not as good at getting others to cooperate. And they feel that they should always be in command of circumstances and situations.

In their intense anger and rage, these bullies look at you. And through use of force and violence, these bullies shift the blame. They shift it from their own sense of powerlessness to something you must have done.

They see you as their enemy or their adversary. Therefore, they feel that they must punish and destroy you.

Therefore, their knee-jerk reactions are triggered with a self-demeaning or self-defeating thought and feeling of indignation. And this trigger happens somewhere between your statement or action and their blow-up.

3. They care what you and everyone else thinks of them.

Consequently, the bully has an afterthought that compels them to physically attack you. The afterthought can be something like:

  • “He thinks I’m a wuss.”
  • “He thinks I’m chicken.”
  • “She thinks I’m weak.”
  • “I’m not getting through to this jerk.”
  • “He doesn’t respect me.”
  • “I need to show this person she cannot ignore me and just walk away.”

This is all the result of the bully’s feeling hurt. Therefore, they cover this hurt feeling behind a veneer of anger and toughness.

Moreover, physically violent bullies believe that being calm and cool is a sign of weakness. They feel the same about walking away from confrontation.

 They also think that ignoring an aggressor is a sign of disrespect. However, understand that these bullies place high value on their status and social image.

Therefore, when they feel that you’ve slighted them, they make you responsible for their feelings of indignation.

4. Physical bullies must use violence to keep their power.

In other words, they think they’re entitled to put their hands on you. Why? Because they think that you wronged them somehow. Therefore, you should be punished.

Also, physically violent bullies impose rules of engagement on you that they, themselves, don’t follow. Bullies think they’re exempt from any rules.

Again, physical bullies have a sense of entitlement. They believe that you should respect them at all times. According to your bullies, you should know what they want from you.

In fact, your bullies expect you to do what they tell you to do and never say no to them. Moreover, you should only tell them what they want to hear.

In short, your bullies expect you to satisfy their every whim, even if it means sacrificing yourself for them.

5. They see themselves as the victim and you as the aggressor who must be punished.

In their minds, they’re thinking the following thoughts.

  • “You caused me distress!”
  • “You made me mad, so I must make you pay dearly for it!”
  • “How dare you defy me!”
  • “That loser is not giving me the respect they owe me.”

By reversing the roles and making you the aggressor, physical bullies can blunt the pains of their frustrations and disappointments. Why? Because anger and rage are less unpleasant than hopelessness.

Physical violence may Seem like strength. But, is it?

Physical bullies may look strong and mighty. They may seem tough when they’re whipping and beating up on you, However, they’re really weak.

In fact, they’re the weakest of all other types of bullies. And it’s because they can’t have power any other way. The only way they can get it is to use physical force.

Outside of their use of fear and bodily harm, these bullies are totally ineffective. They have no gift of gab, charm nor seductive powers.

In other words, they aren’t able to persuade people to do what they want.

Physically violent bullies constantly apply evil intentions to you. Therefore, they feel consistent urges to make you pay for being such a pain.

Remember that your bullies are under the delusion that you’re persecuting them when, in fact, it’s the opposite. However, realize that blaming you helps them soothe their self-image.

Fisticuffs give physical bullies psychological rewards.

When physically violent bullies attacks you and beats you down, they get instant psychological rewards. As a result, they relieve their anger and get a sense of power.

Finally, they get to feel a sense of satisfaction and justice.

Moreover, your bullies get to deal with you up close. They get to look into your eyes to see your pain. Also, they want to hear you cry out or scream in pain.

They also get the satisfaction from the possibility of getting you good and bloody. For them, that’s icing on the cake.

Realize that these people are sick individuals. They derive pleasure from inflicting cuts, bruises, and broken bones.

6. These types of Bullies Feel Powerless. they’re are No Different Than Rapists

For example, the reason why most rapists rape isn’t only about power over another. Put bluntly, it’s because they couldn’t get sex any other way.

Maybe they have no game. In other words, they have a hard time seducing a woman to go to bed with them. It could be that they don’t know how to flirt with or court a woman effectively.

Moreover, maybe they’re creepy or unattractive and women find them repulsive. Either way, they’re a turn off to potential partners.

Most rapists are ineffective and powerless with women under normal circumstances. So, the only way they can get sexual gratification is to use force and violence- rape!

7. Physical Bullies Feel Vulnerable during conflicts.

It comes down to the  views of not just others, but of themselves. The reason these bullies use physical force and violence is because they feel vulnerable in conflicts.

Therefore, they go to the only problem-solving technique they know. Physical violence is the only way they can punish their targets and restore their self-esteem.

Here’s another way to look at it. Anytime anyone has to physically threaten you to make you do what they want, it only means that you have all the power, not them. They may beat the crap out of you but you don’t have to resort to that kind of behavior to get your needs met.

Moreover, your scratches, bruises, and broken bones will heal. But your bullies’ stupidity and lack of social intelligence are things they are stuck with forever!

If nothing else, remember this! You have a God-given, animal right to defend yourself from harm. If a bully is pounding on you, it’s no use relying on the school, workplace, or the law to protect you.

You must learn to protect yourself and if that means throwing up your dukes, so be it!

8. Instant Gratification.

These bullies tend to crave instant and immediate gratification. Physical violence gives them that. Moreover, your bullies get an immediate rush of power and dominion.  And they think that they’ve won.

Many physically violent bullies are egocentric and have delusions of grandeur. And when you stand up to them, you shatter their delusions.

Moreover, if you say anything back to the bullies, it automatically puts your bullies on the weaker end. Therefore, they fly into a rage and use violence to restore that sense of power and invincibility.

Understand that these types of people are self-serving. And they feel superior to anyone else. Therefore, they think they have innate entitlements that supersede even your most basic human rights.

Physical Bullies Expect you to take their shit.

These bullies believe they’re entitled to hurt you.  On the other hand, they believe you’re just supposed to shut up and take it. They expect you to take the abuse without question or protest.

Therefore, when you stand up and oppose the abuse, your bullies will take it as a challenge. They may even see it as an insult. As a result, they will use forceful and violent measures to take you down.

9. They are Sadistic.

Physical bullies derive feelings of pleasure when beating you up. Moreover, they feel no shame unless the wrong people find them out.

They’re open with their violence and don’t fear accountability. Why? Because they know that most others are too scared to confront them.

Physical bullies have no qualms about asserting their dominance over others. They feel their entitlements supersede your basic rights.

Therefore, they confidently encroach on your time, your space, and your safety. Where most people would feel shame over hurting someone, physical bullies only feel powerful.

Sadly, there isn’t much you can do to help these types of people. Sadistic people are resistant to any help. Consequently, those who are physically violent usually end up in prison for battery or murder.

Bullies have many secrets and it’s up to you to find out what they are. Also, it’s up to you to defend yourself against them no matter what.

This post is all about the mentality of physical bullies so that you’ll be more emboldened to defend yourself.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How to Deal with Physical Bullies

2. Physical Bullying Information: 5 Must-Know Secrets Bullies Don’t Want You to Know

3. Secrets Bullies Hope You Never Find Out: 11 Must-Know Facts about Bullies

4. Standing Up to Bullies: 7 Ways Bullies React When You Stop Taking Their Crap