Tag: bullies

bullies

Flattery vs Compliment: 7 Signs Bullies are Buttering You Up

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‘Want to know the difference of flattery vs compliment? Here are all the differences you need to know about.

flattery vs compliment

Compliments are great. But only if they come from the heart.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn how to differentiate flattery vs compliment so that you know when to say thank you and when someone is just trying to butter you up.

Once you learn all about these crucial details, you will be able to spot a fake compliment when you hear one.

This post is all about the differences between flattery vs compliment and how you should respond to each.

Flattery vs compliment

Targets of bullying must know the difference between the two. And, surprisingly, many people think that compliments and flattery are one and the same. They aren’t.

A compliment is genuine. Whereas flattery is fake.

A compliment comes from the heart and is truthful. Also, compliments are earned. They’re reserved for people who deserve them. Compliments are given to praise someone for an accomplishment. They are an acknowledgement for a good deed or a job well done.

Flattery, on the other hand, is used for self-servitude. It is insincere, deceptive, and can be an insult to the recipient. Because, again, it is strictly used for selfish purposes. Flattery and insincere compliments are both the same.

Therefore, bullies never pay sincere compliments, especially to their victims. However, they will use flattery to butter them up to manipulate and exploit them. Bullies may also use flattery as a form of subtle sarcasm.

And if the target happens to be gullible, he may confuse it for genuine compliments. Bullies will then watch the victim’s face light up with over-excitement, then laugh later.

Remember that many targets of bullying are often thirsty for any sign of approval and praise because they don’t get enough of it, if they get any at all. Therefore, anything that even looks like approval, they’ll be excited to receive, even overly so.

So, what are the differences between flattery and compliments?

Flattery vs Compliment:

Your Relationship with the person giving it

Simple. You can tell by the kind of relationship you have with the person complimenting you. In other words, if the person complimenting you is a bully who normally mistreats you, then you can be sure that it’s flattery. And the compliment is fake, phony, and false.

I can’t stress this enough. Never take seriously any “compliment” you receive from a bully. When a bully is suddenly nice to you and gives compliments, it is likely an attempt to manipulate you.

A bully who compliments you is only flattering you. They are looking for an eventual payoff, be it psychological or otherwise.

In contrast, if the person is a true friend or family member who loves you and has never intentionally harmed you, you know that the compliment is for real. Even if the praise comes from a total stranger, it would be more acceptable than if it came from a bully.

Still, even with strangers, you should be gracious but cautious because they haven’t established a relationship with you yet. A simple thank you will do in this situation.

Make Sure Your Own Compliments are Sincere.

Just the same, if you are the one making the compliment, make sure the person you compliment is a close friend or family member. In other words, make sure that person damn well deserves it from you and that they’ve done something that warrants it.

Understand that most people know their strengths and weaknesses. And if you give them a false accolade on something they know they aren’t good at, they will see that you’re lying to them. Also, they will wonder what ulterior motives you have in giving them such a fake compliment.

And last and most importantly, never compliment a bully! Ever!

Flattery vs Compliment:

Here’s why:

  1. Bullies get their behinds kissed all the time, and it’s exactly how they’ll perceive it.
  2. You will be giving the bully a juicy opportunity to turn it against you and steamroll you with it.
  3. Bullies are the last people who deserve praise. Never give anyone anything they haven’t earned.

Trust me, bullies, especially the arrogant and puffed-up type, get their boots licked enough.

They get false compliments and fake sympathy from their sycophants daily. How do you think they got so sickeningly full of themselves? Again, compliments should only be handed out to people who deserve them.

I learned this the hard way when I was sixteen and a sophomore in high school.

I remember seeing a girl in the cafeteria at lunch, and she was wearing a lovely dress. Naturally, I told her that it was a beautiful dress and that I liked it. And I meant it from the bottom of my heart when I said it.

However, it only fueled her arrogance. She only sneered at me and said,

“I know. So what? Nobody likes you, and you think kissing up changes things?”

You can imagine how heartbroken and humiliated I was because she said that aloud, in front of an audience. I vowed that, from that moment on, I would give compliments only to those I trusted.

Few things uplift a person like a sincere compliment, which comes from the heart. However, a bully will only wipe their butts with it, then throw it back at you.

Flattery vs Compliment:

They may accept anyone else’s compliment. But if it comes for you, your bullies will only see it as ass-kissing.

Realize that a bully will only see it as confirmation that they are better than you. A bully will also think that you’re only trying to suck up to them to get them off your back.

A compliment to a bully is nothing more than an ego boost. And why not? Again, bullies are used to having most other classmates or coworkers bow down before them.

Moreover, it’s an opportunity for them to rake your dignity over the coals.

Instead, be the one who gives these life-suckers and happiness thieves a healthy dose of the real world. Be indifferent toward them- like you just don’t give a crap about them.

They may get angry because they may think people owe them allegiance, but you won’t give them the wrong impression. And, most importantly, you’ll walk away with your self-respect intact.

Follow these three rules, and I promise you that your value will increase significantly. It may not seem so, but it will.

So, how can you tell when your bullies are trying to butter you up to get something from you? Here’s what to look for.

1. A Sudden Chance of Heart.

Anytime your bullies have a sudden change of heart, your antennae should automatically go up! Nobody becomes a friend overnight. Friendship takes time because trust takes time to build.

Therefore, just as you shouldn’t rush into a romantic relationship, neither should you rush into a friendship. If someone who is usually brutal toward you suddenly begins treating you warmly, watch out!

Bullies will often begin sweet-talking you when they want something from you. So, look for them to ask you for something once they’ve buttered you up enough.

2. Flattery vs Compliment:

Excessive Sweet-Talk

You must understand that bullies have a higher understanding of human nature than most. They instinctively know that after they’ve bullied you over a certain amount of time and turned enough people against you, you’ll likely be hungry for any morsel of kindness.

People can sense when you’re vulnerable. And they will take full advantage!

You’ll know that something is off because your bullies will overdo the pleasantries. They’ll use excessive flattery. And, man! Do they lay it on thick!

Therefore, if they’re so sickeningly sweet that you swear you’re getting a mouthful of cavities just listening to them, that’s your cue to find the door.

3. fake smiles

A genuine smile is when a person smiles with their eyes and their mouth. You’ll see their eyes light up and crinkles develop around their eyes. On the other hand, if someone smiles only with their mouth, it’s time to end the conversation and excuse yourself.

4. Micro-flashes

If you pay close attention to body language and facial expressions, you’ll notice those tiny, split-second flashes of contempt on their faces. Moreover, you’ll notice them when your bullies think you aren’t looking or paying attention.

Therefore, don’t ignore those. Bid them goodbye and politely leave.

5. Flattery vs Compliment

Giggling or smirking among themselves after you turn and walk away

They’ll look at you until you turn your back. Once you walk away, they’ll give each other knowing glances. Or, they may look at each other and give a wink, a nod, or both.

Also, you may hear giggling and snickering as you walk away. These are a dead giveaway! Therefore, give these idiots the boot!

6. They will get furious when you politely decline any invitations or requests.

Again! Steer clear. It only goes to show that they don’t respect you as a person with boundaries and human rights!

Also, it’s a sign that in their invitations or requests, they more than likely had plans for you that you don’t know about. Maybe they invited you to dinner or a party as a way to lure you to a possible set-up for something humiliating or dangerous?

You never know. And if you don’t know, don’t go!

7. Your Gut will warn you!

When it comes to bullies, always be on the lookout for anything out of the ordinary. Therefore, if your bullies shower you with flattery, you’ll notice that something doesn’t feel right.

This is your first clue. Your gut will always warn you when there’s danger around. So, listen to it.

Flattery vs Compliment:

In Conclusion:

Any time bullies want something from you, the first thing they do is have a sudden change of heart and pour on the flattery. Therefore, always look at how they’ve treated you in the past. Because past behavior always predicts future behavior.

You’re a target, but you don’t have to be a victim.

This post was all about the differences in flattery vs compliment so that you will see the difference and protect yourself from insincere people.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Why is My Bully Being Nice to Me? Here are 5 Reasons to Beware!

2. Target vs Victim: 5 Reasons Your Choice of Words Matters

3. Character vs Reputation: 4 Tactics Bullies Use to Smear You  

how to deal with haters and jealous people

How to Deal with Haters and Why Having Them is Good

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‘Want to know how to deal with haters? Here’s everything you need to know.

how to deal with haters

Haters can make your life harder than it should be. Therefore, in this post, you will learn how to deal with haters without stooping to their level.

Once you learn all of this essential and detailed information, you will be able to rise above your bullies and haters confidently.

This post is all about how to deal with haters so that you can save your self-esteem without sacrificing your goodness.

How to Deal with Haters

Anyone who’s anyone has haters. If you don’t have haters, you aren’t doing something right. Therefore, if you have haters and bullies on your back, maybe they hate you because you have something they wish they had.

Or, it could be because they’re so miserable with their own lives that they want to give you a difficult time to feel better about themselves.

Whatever the case, realize that their hatred is only hurting them, not you.

Hate Only hurts the Hater, Not the Hated

As a survivor of severe bullying and peer abuse, I’ve seen the faces of hate – up close and personal. And let me tell you, it’s ugly! And dangerous!

I know what it looks like. I’ve felt its painful sting. As much as I hate to admit it, I’ve even directed toward others in those days.

However, hatred is worthless. Most people don’t understand the damage it does to not the hated, but the hater!

Hate causes the hater more pain than it does the hated. I say this because I’ve witnessed it.

In the past, I’ve looked into the eyes of my bullies. I’ve stared deep into their eyes, down into their souls! And I firmly believe that if there weren’t a law against murder, I probably wouldn’t be here today.

How to Deal with Haters:

When You’re On the Receiving End of Hatred

That was the kind of hate many of my classmates had for me. I saw how it would burn them up inside. ‘You see? That’s what hate does. When you have hatred for another person, you’re only hurting yourself.

Because hate will eat you up inside and make you batty. It is a sick and twisted obsession, and it can take over your life if you allow it to.

Hatred can destroy your happiness and prospects. It skews your judgment and ability to think clearly. It causes you to make horrible decisions that can alter the entire trajectory of your life.

Hate is Harmful on Both Sides

When a person has hatred for another human being, it numbs their conscience and dulls their reasoning capabilities. They will condone things they would otherwise deem immoral and evil.

The hater will approve of the most depraved, heinous, and atrocious atrocities directed toward the hated person. However, they would disapprove of it, even condemn it, if it’s against anyone else, even a total stranger.

Hate turns even the kindest, most caring people into depraved monsters. It destroys haters and targets alike. Hate kills.

Indifference is a better option than hate. Because with indifference, you could absolutely care less. You couldn’t care less if the person is doing well or poorly, what he thinks, what he says, or what he does.

How to Deal with Haters:

Indifference is Much Better than Hate

On the other hand, with hate, you care because all you want is for the hated person to suffer. There’s a strong desire to make sure nothing good happens to those you hate.

And you obsessively seek to destroy them and their life. You want to make sure all opportunities are closed off to the hated person. This is what hate does. It causes haters to obsess over the hated.

So, if you’re a target of bullies, let them go ahead and hate on you. But don’t hate them back. Instead, be indifferent toward them. And how you do that is to stop caring what others think and do your thing, baby!

Haters live to spite you and cause you lots of stress. They love to see you fail and despise it when you win. Even the greatest have haters.

Therefore, what if I told you that having haters can be a good thing and you could use it to your advantage?

Most victims of bullying see haters as a bad thing. In other words, they see them as a hindrance to their progress. However, they don’t have to be.

It depends on how you look at it and how you use it. Once you start seeing the positives in it, they won’t be so threatening to you. In fact, you may even enjoy watching them squirm every time they see you.

How to Deal with Haters:

5 Reasons They Hate You So Much

The greatest people in the world have a pack of haters behind them. But many of them don’t understand why.

Therefore, if you have haters, you probably wonder, “What did I ever do to them?”

You may think to yourself, “I know I’m not a bad person and I treat everyone how I would want to be treated. So, why do these people hate me so much?”

So, allow me to answer.

You didn’t do anything to them. In fact, you did nothing wrong. Period! What they think doesn’t matter. Know that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you.

I want you to know that you’re okay. You’re enough. And you’re awesome just the way you are. Now, you’re probably thinking, “But there’s got to be some reason they hate me like they do?”

And you’re right. There are many reasons your haters hate you. But those reasons have nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.

Here are the reasons your haters have a problem with you.

1. How to Deal with Haters:

They don’t have a life.

Or they don’t have one that’s meaningful. Also, most haters aren’t what they appear to be. Many are life losers who have no redeeming qualities whatsoever.

So, they have nothing better to do than to hate on you. Many of these types of haters are broke, jobless, partner-less, and live in their mom’s basement.

Only they would never in a million years tell you this. They’d go out of their way to keep that hidden. Why? Because, if it ever got out, they’d lose face and, therefore, lose much of their power.

Bullying you is their power because they can’t get it anywhere else.

Therefore, to feel better about themselves, they’ll troll your social media pages, make incendiary comments, and post vile things about you. If they happen to be local to your area and you know them, they’ll talk trash about you behind your back.

Moreover, they smear and slander you, trying to kill your reputation, your opportunities, and prospects. These types of haters are bored with life. And their only source of entertainment and an endorphin rush is to cause drama in other people’s lives.

Again, it’s the only source of power they have left.

Therefore, these are the types of people you should feel sorry for. Why? Because they live truly miserable and pathetic lives.

And the only way they can feel powerful is to ruin your life.

Sadly, we have so many people like that today. Many of them get involved in the cancel culture that’s so prevalent. Again, understand that this is a last-ditch effort for them to achieve power. Unfortunately for the rest of us, it seems to work for them.

2. 5 Reasons You Have Haters:

They’re not happy in their lives.

This can go hand in hand with number 1. However, some people can have everything, a good job, a lovely home, a good family, and still not be happy. Therefore, what they lack is contentment.

Or, it could be that they aren’t happy with some things in their life. Whatever it may be, their attitude is this. If they can’t be satisfied, then by George, they’re going to make sure you’re not happy either.

In other words, they want to take away your peace of mind and bring you down to their level of misery. And you aren’t the only one.

There are probably other people they do this to as well. Again, they’re miserable people, and you shouldn’t hate them back; you should only pity them.

3. You have something they don’t have.

No one ever said life was fair. Some people can, and some can’t. Some have, and some don’t. It’s a hard part of reality that makes some people angry.

Why? Because they can’t seem to figure out how to obtain the things they want. So, they hate on anyone who has the things they (the haters) have been longing for and who has life a little easier than they do.

Moreover, this is probably the reason they don’t have the things they desire. They’re too busy focusing on what you have rather than focusing and working hard to attain those goals for themselves.

I know many lazy people who sit around wishing for things all the time. They don’t want to work for what they want. Yet they get outraged at those who work hard and achieve the things they wish for.

The haters never stop to think that, if you want something, you must make it a goal. Moreover, you must focus on that goal and work hard, no matter how long it takes to attain it.

However, most haters don’t want to work. And if they do work, they either make the wrong choices, or, sometimes, life doesn’t work out how they want.

Nevertheless, hating only hurts them and not you. Why? Because you probably don’t know about it, and if you do, you have the choice not to care.

4. 5 Reasons You Have Haters:

Jealousy.

This goes back to you having something your haters don’t have. Moreover, it goes back to those poor souls not being happy in their lives.

Whether it’s an admirable trait you may have, such as the ability to make friends easily, or how you look, they don’t want you to have it.

Your haters could be jealous of what you have or your ability to be happy. They want to take it all from you because they don’t have it and don’t think they can ever get it.

Therefore, feel good about it. This isn’t to say that you should be buddies with them, but feel good about yourself, knowing these people exist.

5. Your good qualities are a threat to them.

In other words, you make them look bad. You cause them to compare themselves with you and see you as competition. And if they ever feel like you’re winning over them, look out!

Again, realize that you aren’t at fault here. It was nothing you said or did to ruffle their feathers, and there’s nothing wrong with you.

You are enough. You are awesome! Your haters only say otherwise to mess with your mind and throw you off balance. Don’t let them do that to you!

Moreover, they want to rip your confidence and self-esteem to shreds. Why? Because if they can’t have what you were blessed with, they’ll go after something you have that they think is easier to take. And that’s your confidence and self-esteem.

In other words, if your haters can’t rob you of the things you have and they wish they had, then they’ll rob you of your mental health. And they’ll attack your psychological well-being to even the score a little.

This is how they operate. However, haters only win if you allow them to tear you down.

Reasons You Have Haters:

Let your haters be your motivation.

Haters can stress you out, yes. But they can also motivate you. So, be your best self and keep your haters blabbing. Think about it. Your haters are the ones who keep you relevant.

They’re your biggest fans, if you really think about it. Why? Because haters are the people who watch you the closest.

The thoughts and opinions of bullies are worthless to you, or they should be. This may sound strange to many targets, especially those whom bullies have brainwashed for so long.

And that’s a terrible thing. Therefore, if you’re a target who has been conditioned, I’d like for you to ask yourself these questions:

Has it benefited me in any way to measure my value as a person by the opinions of bullies?

Would my bullies be able to hold up as well as I do if they themselves had to endure bullying?

Even on the off-chance that they could, does that give them license to judge me, a person who is enduring something that would break many others?

If we all worried about the opinions of our bullies and haters, the world wouldn’t have even a tenth of it’s population. Moreover, we wouldn’t have doctors, lawyers, writers, comedians, singers, actors, and other such great people.

They all would have collapsed under the crushing weight of anticipated judgements and personal attacks. Therefore, they never would have reached the heights of success that they have.

Therefore, let your haters be your motivation to love yourself, to care for yourself, and to improve your life.

It’s Not What They Call You, It’s What You Answer to.

Your favorite rock star receives hate and vitriolic comments over a few lyrics in one of his songs. Back in the pre-Internet days, famous actors and musicians got bags of hate mail along with the fan mail.

Many targets of bullying have an intense fear of being judged, and it’s exactly what holds them back in life. Why? Because it can cause you to hold back your feelings. Furthermore, you will allow this fear to stifle your talents and creativity.

Realize that a bully’s judgment is only a reflection of their own fears and insecurities.

This is why you must never allow haters or anyone else to make you believe that their feelings about you are more important than how you feel about yourself. Never take your bullies’ word over your own. Never allow their opinions to trump yours.

And once you realize how cheap your bullies’ thoughts and opinions of you really are, they will have less effect on you.

Reasons You Have Haters:

In Closing

You should love your haters. Why? Because your haters are your fans, they just don’t know it. They keep you relevant.

One thing bullies and haters despise is when they can’t get you to hate yourself.

How you deal with haters is to let them hate and keep doing your thing. Keep being yourself. And continue to love yourself.

Know the real reasons you have haters and feel good about it!

This post gave you all the reasons you have haters to motivate, inspire, and encourage you.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. 5 Reasons You Have Haters

2. How to Love Yourself when Everyone Hates You

3. What Bullies Hate Most: 9 Things Bullies Despise

things bullies hate most

Things Bullies Hate: 9 Things That Drive Them Up the Wall

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‘Want to know about all the things bullies hate? Here are the most common things they despise.

things bullies hate

There are things bullies hate, and if you know what they are, you can use them to gain an advantage.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about the most common things bullies hate so that you can weaponize them to defend yourself.

Once you learn all about this critical information, you will be better able to protect yourself the next time they come for you.

This post is all about the things bullies hate most, so that you can gain the advantage you need to ensure your safety.

Things Bullies Hate

Bullies have images to keep up. Therefore, they hate anything that pokes holes in their image. And they hate anyone who sees behind the facades. So, what are the things that might threaten their images of perfection?

1. Constructive Criticism

Bullies don’t take constructive criticism very well. They only react to it as if it is a personal attack. Constructive criticism is designed to help you, not harm you. However, bullies don’t see it that way.

Constructive criticism makes you better. In contrast, destructive criticism tears you down. Let’s give an example of constructive and destructive criticism.

Constructive:

“What you did was foolish.”

Destructive:

“You’re foolish.”

Constructive criticism attacks the deed. Destructive criticism attacks the person. However, bullies can’t tell the difference because they’re too wrapped up in themselves to notice.

Remember that bullies are highly egocentric. They must always be right about everything. Or, more appropriately, look as if they’re right about everything. Bullies have a knack for hiding beneath a veneer of total perfection.

They do this for several reasons.

  1. It makes them look better than they really are.
  2. The veneer of perfection can be used as protection from accountability and shield them from reproach.
  3. It can be used to draw others to them and fool them.
  4. It can be used as a weapon against their targets.
  5. It gives them status and social capital.
  6. It gives them the attention and admiration they seek.

Things Bullies Hate:

Bullies hate getting it, but they love giving it.

Bullies love criticizing you because it makes them look like they’re smarter than you. They will use the veil of constructive criticism to disparage others they deem inferior and unworthy.

They may tell you that they’re only giving you this criticism to help you. However, they’re doing it to show you and everyone else that they’re superior to you. A bully’s hypocrisy knows no bounds.

If a bully ever unfairly criticizes you, you must stand up to them. Tell them in no uncertain terms to mind their own affairs and go on about their business.

And if they keep it up, hit them with their own book of standards. You can always say something like:

“That sounds real good coming from someone who doesn’t practice what they preach. Now, get out of here and go on about your business.”

This is one comeback you can use. It’s straightforward and, even better, it’s blunt. It’s nothing fancy. You don’t have to get cute or witty with it. Just say what you mean, mean what you say, and say it in as few words as possible.

2. Rules

Bullies hate following rules. Remember that bullies have a grandiose sense of entitlement. Moreover, they crave power. And the more power they have, the more they want.

Therefore, they feel that rules don’t apply to them. In their minds, rules are for everyone else.

3. Things Bullies Hate:

Being Stood up to

Bullies despise it when you stand up to them. Why? Because you are challenging their perceived authority. Therefore, they will fight you tooth and nail to reinforce their power over you.

Realize that when you stand up to a bully, things usually get worse before they get better. This is because bullies aren’t used to you defending yourself. In fact, they aren’t used to anyone standing up to them.

This is because others usually kiss their ass and give them free reign.

Therefore, bullies grow quite comfortable with having carte blanche to ride roughshod over you any time they feel like it. And they don’t want those advantages to stop.

Therefore, they’ll fight even harder to keep getting those benefits, even if they do come at your expense.

You must get this through your head right now. Bullies do not care about how they’ve hurt you. They don’t care about how much you’ve suffered from their abuse. The only thing they care about is power and whether they can keep getting what they want from you.

So, they will increase the abuse, not only to punish you, but also to wear you down. Why? Because if they can make you too tired to keep fighting, then they keep the upper hand.

Therefore, they will fight harder to keep you down at first. What you must do is stay strong, no matter how exhausted you may become. And you must also fight harder. This means you have to fight harder than they do.

It’s the only way you will ever get them to leave you alone.

4. Things Bullies Hate:

You proving them wrong

When you prove a bully wrong, you show everyone else that they aren’t so perfect. This puts a dent in their image. Therefore, they’ll try to get back at you to repair it.

5. You outshining them

Upstage a bully, and you’ll get tons of flak for it. To your bullies, you are inferior, and they want you to stay that way.

If you make a significant accomplishment, this makes your bullies look less important. You naturally overshadow anything they’ve accomplished. And they’ll do everything possible to try to reduce you back down where they think you should be.

6. Things Bullies Hate:

Competition

Bullies hate competition. And they despise it especially when it’s you they must compete with. If someone they deem inferior outmatches them in any competition. Oooo! Talk about a blow to the bully’s ego. Ouch!

Understand that bullies see any successes or accomplishments you achieve as a threat to their superiority. Why? Because the bullies’ sense of self-worth is drawn from a sense of one-upmanship and winning over.

Therefore, if you make a huge accomplishment or win any award or prize, bullies will see it as competition with them. As a result, they will escalate the bullying to punish you for that success.

Bullies will get angry and say things like:

  • “You think you’re better than us!”
  • “You think you’re hot stuff!”
  • “You think you’re so f***ing cool, don’t you?”

I’ve come to realize that any time a bully makes any statement that begins with, “You think you’re…,” it usually means jealousy. And it means anger, or resentment aimed at you for a success or desirable quality that you have. Always!

Understand that those three little words can say so much.

7. Taking Orders

Remember that bullies are primarily concerned with exerting power. Therefore, they despise taking orders. Why? Because to take orders means that they must be in a position of inferiority.

Bullies have an attitude of superiority. They don’t follow orders; they give them.

8. Things Bullies Hate:

Someone treating them the way they treat their victims

Bullies are notorious for expecting you to be okay with treatment that they would never be OK with. In their minds, it’s OK for them to treat others with disrespect.

However, when you kick the shit back their way, they become outraged. This is because bullies think that they’re exempt from having to suffer negative treatment.

Bullies think that they’re entitled to respect and admiration. And they become quite angry if you don’t give it to them. Moreover, they may even retaliate vengefully if they feel you aren’t giving them the recognition they think they deserve.

Therefore, see them for who they are… a bunch of smug, self-important turds who think the world should bow before them. Instead of kissing up to them, give them the treatment they give you. Regard them with indifference and dismissal.

9. Being ignored.

I’ve met many bullies who despised being ignored, even if they were acting like total jackasses. Realize that bullies crave attention, and they will do anything to get it.

They want to be the center of attention. “All eyes on me! Look at me! I’m special!”

Therefore, the best thing to do with them is to give them the attention they don’t want. And that is to stand up to them and tell them to get a life. Also, you can give them a dismissive look and walk away.

Things Bullies Hate:

In Closing

Bullies hate anything that doesn’t focus on them. Therefore, the worst you can do to them is dismiss them and keep going about your business. Sometimes, you must give bullies a dose of their own medicine to keep your self-esteem intact.

If you know what your bullies hate most, you can leverage it.

This post was all about the things bullies hate so that you can use them to your advantage.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Jealousy and Bullying: 7 Proven Signs Your Bullies are Jealous 

2. What Bullies Hate Most: 9 Things Bullies Despise 

bullies are cowards in disguise

Bullies are Cowards: Why Targets are the Brave Ones

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‘Want to know why bullies are cowards and how victims are the brave ones? Here is everything you need to know.

bullies are cowards

In a world where appearances prevail, it would seem that bullies are the brave ones and targets are the cowards. But things aren’t always what they seem. Now, are they?

In this post, you will learn why bullies are cowards and victims are the brave ones.

Once you learn all about these essential truths, you will feel better knowing that you are better off than your bullies will ever be.

This post is all about why bullies are often cowards, so that you can see your bullies for who they truly are and begin standing up to them.

Bullies are Cowards

Have you noticed that bullies love to talk smack? They trumpet to the world about how tough they are. Moreover, they believe that everyone else should bow down and tremble before them.

Bullies work hard at beating their chests and bluffing. However, it only goes to prove that they’re the least confident and most insecure schmucks on the face of the earth.

Why? Because anyone who must announce that they’re tough can’t be. When something is there, you don’t have to try and show it.

Those who are tough are usually the quiet ones. They don’t have to talk about it. How many times have you heard stories about the quiet kid beating the crap out of the loudmouth bully who pushed him too far?

The ones who are truly tough never talk. You don’t see these people running around, spouting off about how tough they are because they don’t have to.

They don’t need to tell you about it because they already know they’re tough and there’s no need to prove it to anyone. They’ve already proven it to themselves, and that’s enough.

Bluffs, Blowhards, and Windbags

Therefore, if any bully messes with them, they will get hurt.

I’ve dealt with droves of bullies, and one thing I noticed a long time ago is that they’re loudmouth losers. They puff out their chests and flap their lips. They talk about how they’re going to kick this person’s butt, whip that person’s butt- they never stop.

Additionally, many bullies may employ passive-aggressive tactics. Because they’re too scared to be direct, they like to hurl subtle zingers your way, hoping you won’t notice.

With these chumps, it’s one pissing contest after another.

Bullies are Cowards:

They Quickly Grow Boring.

As a result, having to listen to their gas constantly gets boring fast. Why? Because, again, that’s all you hear out of them.

Anyone who must spit such rubbish isn’t only trying to convince the rest of the world. They’re also trying to convince themselves.

These are characteristics of every single chump who has ever bullied me in my lifetime. It’s not only pathetic, but laughable that they must go through life this way.

Furthermore, these people are so incredibly insecure that you can trigger them just by challenging them in any way. Their egos are that fragile.

These bullies may even approach you and get in your face if they have their entourage of lackeys behind them. Therefore, if you’re a target of bullying, know this.

Your bullies are total fakes. They’re phonies. Cowards. Chumps!

All You Can Do is Pity Them.

When you stop and think about it, it’s hard to hate anyone who is this pathetic. The only thing you can do is feel sorry for such pitiful souls.

Again, remember that those who are genuinely tough don’t have to talk about it. It’s just there.

Always remember this the next time a bully gets in your face or shoots their mouth off. Feel confident in knowing that you’re not like this person and you don’t have to resort to such buffoonery. This alone should be a real self-esteem booster.

Have you noticed that many little people can be the biggest bullies?

Bullies are Cowards:

Bullies with Napoleon Complexes

Many bullies in school were insecure because they were short, skinny, or both. So, they would compensate for that by bullying others.

They would intimidate others by walking around with a scowl on their faces. Or they’d scream, yell, and talk real tough. It’s hilarious when I look back now.

Many of these little squirts do this, and there’s a name for it. It’s called either the “Napoleon Complex” or “little man syndrome.”

Think “Maddy Webber” on the new MacGyver reboot.

Understand that their bark is worse than their bite, and they bully as a defense mechanism. Maybe the little ankle-biters at my school gave me a hard time because bigger kids were bullying them.

But they would never admit it. So, they took the coward’s way out and searched for someone they thought was weaker.

They’d come at you with their spitfire tempers and want to try to fight you. Then they’d wonder why they got a good whack in the nose. Next, they’d either run, crying to a teacher, or they’d go bark up someone else’s tree.

I was small myself, weighing about 120 pounds and standing at only 5’3″ -5’4″. However, some of these kids were even smaller than I was. Such kids are in every school, and you even have tiny adults who behave the same way at work.

We even had a few short and skinny teachers. And they’d scream and yell at the students when they’d get too noisy.

I knew of one male English teacher who’d go wild. He would slam his fists down on his desk or shake his fists in the air.  He would even throw erasers at students and scream like a banshee.

We just knew this little guy was a future resident at the state mental hospital.

Bullies are Cowards:

Real Life Experiences with Tiny Bullies

Even as an adult, I’ve seen different people (especially men) at work who were short and lanky. Yet, they would bark loudly, and I couldn’t help but think that they were compensating somehow for their stature.

Their screaming, cursing, posturing, and jockeying seemed to give them some sense of power. I’m not posting this to make fun of little people. Not all of them are like this. As I mentioned earlier, I’m only 5’4″.

We all come in different sizes and varieties, and we should celebrate those differences. But when you feel you have to bully others to make up for a weakness, you only show what a scared little coward you are. And people like me see right through you, and all we do is laugh.

Try a little kindness instead. Then, when a bigger bully comes for you, we just might come to your defense instead of laughing at you.

Cyber-bullies are the biggest cowards of all.

Bullies are cowards, but Cyber-bullies are the biggest, most pathetic ones.

They sit in the safety of their homes or their mom’s basements, attics, and backyard sheds. And they hide behind fake profiles and screen names, trolling the internet and social media in search of victims.

If you’ve ever dealt with a cyber-bully, I knew how you feel. Words do have power and it’s easy to be hurt when anyone attacks you, online or off. I, too used to get upset when I’d look at my instant messages and find that some idiot had sent me a flamer.

However, today, I’ve learned to see it for what it is and the cyber-bullies for who they are. And that in itself can be a real boost to the self-esteem.

When I think of the term “cyber-bully,” I instantly get a mental picture of one of two types of people:

1. Some broke, unemployed and shirtless fat guy sitting and typing on a computer in his granny’s basement, while stuffing his face with Cheetos and sporting a man-bun.

2. A skinny, pimple-faced, bespectacled geek who only trolls the net to compensate for his lack of sex and a social life in the real world.

Occasionally, I still deal with cyberbullies. When I do, one of those pathetic pictures immediately pops up in my mind. And I can’t help but chuckle to myself.

Bullies are Cowards:

If they have time to troll the internet, they can’t be about much.

Because cyber-bullies often use a fake profile or screen name with either a blank photo or one that’s fake, it only shows that they’re faceless cowards and not to be taken seriously.

These losers talk so big and tough behind that keyboard- oh, yeah! They’re real badasses online. But you can bet that if they ever saw you on the street, they wouldn’t have the sack to step up.

So, ask yourself these questions.

  • Should I take these wusses so seriously?
  • Should I give these worthless schmucks the power to make us feel bad about ourselves?
  • Should I value their useless gibberish?

I can’t speak for anyone else. However, I have a hard time valuing the worthless opinions of anyone who doesn’t have a name or face.

Any person who’s a Rambo in cyberspace but a George McFly on the street, I can only take with a horselaugh and a grain of salt.

You either have a big, brass pair or you don’t.

It takes a real zero to spend even a few hours a day trolling other users. You just know that the person has no ambition, no prospects, and no life.

Understand that when you’re cyber-bullied, often you’re dealing with a poor soul who is bored, lonely, and miserable.

And the only way they can feel good about themselves and have power is to do what they’re doing now.

Therefore, if you are cyber-bullied online, you shouldn’t put too much stock in their opinions. Their words don’t carry a lot of weight.

Understand that cyber-bullies are often people who flame others because they’re insecure, self-loathing, and have nothing going for them. Online is the only way these pathetic losers can have a social life.

That alone speaks volumes about the kind of people they are and the crappy lives they lead. So, again, should you take these losers seriously? Are they worth getting angry or depressed over?

These idiots can’t make you feel bad about yourself unless you allow them to.

Bullies are Cowards:

For words to have power over you, you must first consider the source.

Though words have power, and they can hurt you, you should always consider the source. Because in truth, most cyber-bullies live miserable existences and should only be pitied.

Yet, victims are (mistakenly) branded as cowards. They are the ones who come to school or work and face bullies… alone, no matter how viciously they get brutalized.

Through all the name-calling, the taunts, the brutal beatings, and the threats to their lives, targets manage to reach within themselves and push through another day.

To endure abuse every single day for several years and still find the resolve to soldier on? Now that takes courage! Targets of bullying are the real warriors! Notice I didn’t say victim.

It takes bravery to be a target of relentless bullying and remain standing tall. To endure bouts of daily and constant abuse and make it to the finish line of high school graduation or the end-of-week paycheck? That takes guts!

To stay in the race, while most bullies drop out of school or quit their jobs when the going gets tough? That’s not only brave, but it’s also heroic! To be your own hero? That takes bravery, bullies will never have.

So take advantage of it and shut your bullies down for good! You don’t have to be an easy target.

This post explained why bullies are cowards so that their games DON’T have the effect on you they once did and you can feel better about yourself knowing that you aren’t them.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How to Shut Down a Bully: 11 Comebacks that Stop Them Cold

2. Easy Targets for Bullies: 6 Groups of People Bullies Love to Target

3. Passive-Aggressive Bullying: 7 Hallmarks of Sneak Dissing

is bullying natural selection

Is Bullying Natural? 3 Cop Outs Bullies Use for Excuses

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Is bullying natural? Some people think so, and some do not. Here are all the details you need to know.

is bullying natural

Many people say that bullying is only natural selection. Additionally, they may refer to it as Darwinism. They may even say that bullying is all about survival of the fittest.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn to look further into to the age-old question, “Is bullying natural?”. Also, you will learn all about bullying, natural selection, Darwinism, and survival of the fittest so that you can make your own judgments.

Once you learn all about these details, you will be able to draw more informed conclusions.

Is bullying natural? This post may or may not give you the answer you’re looking for. However, it will prompt you to conduct some research and draw your own conclusions.

Is Bullying Natural?

Anytime I hear people refer to bullying as either of the three mentioned in this article’s title, I find it cringeworthy at best! And the words that immediately flash through my mind are “cop-out,” “trivialization,” and “excuses.”

However, the more research I do, the more I’m convinced that it is a dark part of human nature. However, it doesn’t mean it’s natural, per se. Moreover, it damn sure isn’t right, and people shouldn’t do it.

Many bullies use the natural selection, Darwinism, and survival of the fittest science as excuses to continue their behavior.

And that is what pisses me off!

When bullies describe their behavior as one of these three things, they are essentially saying that their behavior is entirely normal. Therefore, they don’t have to stop the abuse.

They’re also saying that victims are weak and undesirable. And that they should be eliminated from the human race. Moreover, they believe that bullying is required for the survival of the human race.

Bullying is not normal.

Bullying is anything but normal. It is brutal, malicious, hurtful, and cowardly.

Victims of bullying are not weak. And they are not undesirable. They may think differently from most. They are often exceptional people with brilliant minds.

Many celebrities, CEOs, inventors, writers, scientists, doctors, and professors were bullied in school. Moreover, some of them have been bullied in the workplace as adults. However, they survived.

If these people had not survived, the world might never have seen many awesome inventions.  Many breakthroughs never would have happened.

For example, Edison might not have invented the electric light bulb. Bell may not have finished inventing the telephone.

Perhaps we would never have seen the first organ transplant. Where would we be without these people?

Bullying may be a dark part of human nature. But, I would not go so far as to say that it’s natural or normal.

Is Bullying Natural?

Bullying only destroys the human race.

An example of this would be the Nazi’s bullying of Jews during World War II. As a result, they ended up slaughtering six million of them during the holocaust.

Now, do you still think that bullying is necessary for the survival of our species?

Bullying is never okay! And sadly, I’ve heard many people refer to it as one of the above three. Understand that this is only a cop-out.

It’s a way to blame victims. And, it’s an excuse not to help those who are bullied.

If you are a bully or bystander and believe this garbage, then you are only lying to yourself. If you’re a victim, rest assured that you are not weak, nor are you undesirable.

It only means that you are brave enough to think outside the box. Moreover, you refuse to be a follower.

Those are characteristics that you should be proud of. Why? Because you have the opportunity to go far and make a difference in society.

Therefore, don’t give up! Give yourself a chance! You never know. In the future, you may be the person who brings positive change to the world. And your bullies will more than likely end up living less than desirable lives.

So, what are Darwinism, natural selection, and survival of the fittest?

Is Bullying Natural?

What is Darwinism and Natural Selection?

There are 3 cop outs bullies hide behind. Darwinism, Natural Selection, and Survival of the Fittest.

Darwinism refers to the theory of natural selection. In other words, humans and animals choose mates based on their preferred inherited genes and traits. For instance, partners are likely to select those with specific physical and mental characteristics over others.

The purpose of this is to ensure the production of healthier offspring. That’s fine and dandy. I get that. However, bullying has nothing to do with natural selection. Why? Because bullying is abuse.

It’s one thing not to prefer a particular person for a relationship or friendship. That’s okay because we like what we like. However, when a bully sets out to bully a target, they must stalk them to do it.

Again, bullying is abuse. Natural selection doesn’t involve bullying. You choose certain people over others. And it doesn’t have to involve bullying.

This is why Darwinism and Natural Selection are excuses bullies use to cop out behind.

When you choose a particular person over the other, it doesn’t involve bullying the other. In other words, just because someone chooses someone else over you, it doesn’t mean they’re out to harm you. Bullying, on the other hand, seeks to do deliberate harm.

What is Survival of the Fittest?

Survival of the fittest is the theory that organisms best suited to their environment are more likely to survive, reproduce, and pass their superior genes to their offspring.

Again, this doesn’t involve bullying. It simply means that those who are best suited to their environments are more likely to survive. For instance, an Inuit can survive in cold climates. In contrast, someone from the tropics will have a hard time adapting and surviving in the Arctic.

It doesn’t involve bullying.

Is Bullying Natural?

5 myths about bullying we need to be aware of

Myths are often mistaken for facts. Therefore, they can obscure people’s judgment. They can also blind you to bullying behavior, even when it’s happening right in front of your face.

Moreover, myths can even make it hard for a person to know when someone is abusing them.

Here are a few myths to be aware of:

Myth 1. Targets are weak losers who deserve bullying.

People suffering at the hands of bullies are not weak, nor are they losers. Over the past decade or so, we have found that bullies tend to target those who are genuinely good people with kind hearts.

Bullies are evil people who perceive goodness, kindness, and generosity as weaknesses. Therefore, they target people who have these qualities.

Additionally, bullies often target those who are multi-talented, star achievers, and performers. Understand that bullies perceive these individuals as a threat to their power. Why? One-upmanship is one way bullies can feel a sense of power.

When high-achieving targets outshine bullies, they unwittingly provoke jealous rage in them. And these bullies will pull out all the stops to make them pay and set them up to fail.

If nothing else, understand this! Bullies hate to be outshone, outdone, or beaten at anything! Nobody deserves bullying. Ever! Bullying is harmful and can destroy someone’s life.

There are myths about bullying that don’t help.

Is Bullying Natural?

Myth 2. Bullies are brave, strong, cool, exciting, and in control.

Ha! Bullies are the opposite of these things. Let’s explain further.

Bullies are brave.

Nope! Bullies are great, big cowards, but they’re good at hiding it. Bullies live by the motto that strength comes in numbers, so they run around in packs. They hide their cowardice behind groups of sycophants or flying monkeys.

You will never catch a bully alone because a bully doesn’t know how to stand alone. Their followers are there to support them and do their bidding.

Bullies get their power from an entourage. Without their wingmen to cover them, they would be powerless.

Bullies are strong.

No! Bullies are weak. However, they hide that behind a veneer of aggression and false bravado. Understand that bullies draw their power from the fear they instill in others.

What bullies are is a bunch of bluffs, blowhards, and windbags. The tough act they put on is a way they hide their weaknesses.

Bullies are cool.

Wrong! Bullies are pathetic. They bluff, they posture, and they one-up people. They always have to be better than anyone else.

All of this are signs of insecurity and self-loathing. Because if they were secure in themselves, they wouldn’t resort to this kind of buffoonery.

Is Bullying Natural?

Bullies are exciting.

They may seem exciting at first, but they quickly become boring. Why? Because they’ll talk incessantly about themselves.

They will brag and showboat until you’ll want to chew off your arm to get away from them. And they won’t be so exciting once they turn on you.

Bullies are in control.

Really? Is that what you want to call it? Um… not!

Bullies can’t control themselves and their own pathetic lives. So, they seek to control you to feel powerful. And in doing that, they not only create victims, they also develop enemies who hate them with a passion.

If you’re a bully, you may only control someone to a certain degree. You may put the fear of God in them. But you’ll never control what they think of you and how they feel about you.

Why? Because the mind and thoughts are free. And if you run across a person who has a strong sense of self and doesn’t fall for your guff, what are you going to do then?

Is Bullying Natural?

Myth 3. “Bullying is a normal rite of passage that all kids endure.”

Not so. There’s nothing normal about bullying. It’s perverse, twisted, and sick.

Bullying only speaks volumes about their own mental imbalance and lack of character. A bully’s behavior doesn’t reflect on you. It only reflects on them.

And the more we learn about bullying, the more evidence we seem to get that supports this.

Myth 4. Bullying builds character.

No, it doesn’t. It tears it down. Why? Because it erodes the confidence you were born with. It causes anxiety because, when you’re bullied, you no longer feel safe.

Myth 5. Bullying is only Natural Selection and Survival of the Fittest.

It may be a dark part of human nature. But a reason doesn’t equal an excuse. Bullies and their enablers often use this little line as an excuse to normalize their pathetic behavior.

It’s important to dispel these myths. So, do not fall for this garbage.

Never blame yourself for other people’s crappy behavior. Hold on to your truth. And if anyone rattles off any of the above lines to you when you speak out against bullying, counter them and do it with conviction.

Is Bullying Natural?

In Closing:

Bullies are all about abusing others, then making excuses for it. Even bystanders and schools make excuses for bullies. And the myths only serve to encourage bullies and blame victims.

However, bullying is harmful, and it can be dangerous to victims! The effects are often devastating.

Therefore, the next time someone bullies you and makes excuses for it, call them out on their bullshit. And do it straight to their faces.

See their behavior for what it is. Abuse!

This post was all about whether bullying is natural so that you can recognize hogwash and counter it confidently.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Bullying Myths: 5 Widely-Held Beliefs about Bullies and Victims 

2. Excuses Schools Make for Bullies: Here are 7 Most Common

3. Effects of Bullying on the Victim: 13 Symptoms of Bullied People

popularity and bullying in school

Popularity and Bullying

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‘Want to know how popularity and bullying can go hand in hand. Here is all the information you need to know.

popularity and bullying

In this post, you will learn about popularity and bullying so that you can call it out and protect yourself from it.

Once you learn all the ins and outs of this kind of bullying, you will be able to recognize it, call it out, predict your bullies’ behavior, and defend yourself.

This post is all about popularity and bullying, so that you can recognize how they connect and protect yourself from popular bullies.

Popularity and bullying

Most popular people like to bully others. It’s just what they do. Here’s why they do it and what you can do to protect yourself.

Bullying for Increased Social Status

Bullies not only use bullying to control you. They also use it as a vehicle to achieve a higher social status.

And sadly, it works like a charm. The reason it works so well is that, when someone bullies you, their social status rises, while yours falls. They benefit at your expense.

For many, having their peers admire them is the end-all be-all. It adds more value to their sense of self-worth than money and material wealth.

One can achieve an elevated social status through wealth and material possessions. However, they can attain it through bullying if the bully lacks financial means.

On the other hand, if the bully does have material wealth, the social status he gets from bullying is just icing on the cake.

It’s not something he feels he must do to raise his status. It’s something he wants to do because he thinks it’s fun.

Popularity and Bullying:

Why DO popular people bully?

1. Because they have social capital.

It’s because they have the social capital to protect them from wrongdoing. Bullies with social capital are the most destructive

These are the bullies who enjoy the most social connections and friends in high places. A vast majority of people either think well of them or fear them.

This includes classmates at school and coworkers at work. They can also be those in the neighborhood or community.

Bullies can be the “cool kids” at school, the “Good Old Boys” clique at work, or the dominant group in town. These bullies can also include local politicians, businessmen, or members of prominent families in a particular area.

Their popularity is their weapon.

It doesn’t matter how much money you have, it’s how much power you have.

Although money does help, these folks don’t necessarily have to be rich to have these connections. I’ve known many who were quite poor and had a lot of power. Why? Because of the relationships they maintained with influential people.

What gives them the power they have is their connections with the right people. This is why bullies in these select groups are particularly dangerous and can cause you the most harm.

These types of bullies proactively build a network of social relationships. Moreover, they do this to reinforce their power and get protection from any accountability for wrongdoing.

In many cases, they already have well-established ties that date back several years. I can’t stress this enough. So, I’ll repeat it.

Those who are popular do not have to be rich. In fact, most of them aren’t. I’ve met many people who were poor but popular, and wealthy individuals who weren’t.

Money does not equal popularity.

Popularity and Bullying:

Bullies with social connections.

Bullies build connections that benefit them with protection and keep them above reproach. Moreover, these connections give them carte blanche to ride roughshod over anyone freely and with impunity.

They may perpetuate a culture of bullying.

These are the types who will watch their enemies closely. They know they have good name recognition. Therefore, they take advantage of it.

Whenever a bully has a significant amount of social capital, others are less likely to risk pissing them off. Why? Because they may become the next target.

And chances are that if they target you, their groupies and flying monkeys will only follow their lead.

Bullies with power have many wannabes who surround them. These groupies will bully you simply because it’s what the bigger bullies expect of them.

This is why the most popular and well-connected bullies get away with deplorable behavior. Heck! They can do anything they want to anyone.

Therefore, if you become a target of one of them, they will use their influence and connections to destroy every aspect of your life. And they’ll never stop coming after you.

Popular bullies are very influential, persuasive, and, most of all, convincing.

It’s how they were able to achieve their popularity in the first place.

Their names alone carry significant weight behind them. They possess trust, mutual understanding, and shared values and behaviors that promote unity and strengthen their group.

When one of these bullies says something, others, even those outside their circle, listen.  And they take their word as fact!

Popularity and Bullying:

Sacred Cows.

I call these people “sacred cows”. Why?  Because they are the most popular. They have the most power and influence in a school, corporation, or community. They have so much of it that others don’t dare question or speak against them, even if they’re wrong.

In fact, they may get rewarded for their behavior.

Therefore, with sacred cows, people may not necessarily like them. They may even hate them but, you can be sure that they fear them.

So, even haters are careful not to speak against them publicly or within earshot of the wrong people.

If you’re a target of bullies who have social capital, know that they can make your life hell. They can tarnish your name with smear campaigns.

And others will believe it simply because of who the rumors and lies come from. They can also cause the loss of your job and block you from finding new employment. As a result, these bullies can rob you of your ability to make a living.

Popularity can be a powerful weapon!

These bullies can destroy your ability to make new friends because others will be too afraid to associate with you. In other words, you become radioactive!

When bullies are popular and well-liked, no one wants to do anything that might upset them. Therefore, they play it safe and avoid you like a bad disease.

If you own a business, bullies with popularity can discourage customers from patronizing it. They can also have their worker bees set fire to it and burn it down.

And don’t put it past them to trump up false charges against you. They may set you up to be arrested.

For example, if they know a few crooked law enforcement officers, they may have them pull you over on the way home from work.

And these bad cops may plant drugs in your car to have an excuse to throw you in the slammer. If that doesn’t work, they may send henchmen to visit you or meet you on the street somewhere.

Popularity and Bullying:

These bullies are the biggest crooks because they’re popular.

Your self-esteem can also take a harder hit because of these bullies’ popularity. And you’re likely to be paralyzed with fear, especially if you’re a kid in school.

Here are a few things you can do to insulate yourself from popular bullies.

Remember that even the most popular bullies have enemies. And some of those enemies may be just as powerful. Also, bear in mind that you aren’t the only person these creeps have bullied.

There were others before you, and there will be others after you. Bullies with popularity love to throw their weight around. And if they can’t do it with you, they’ll find someone else to buffalo.

Build your own social capital.

Find out who else these brutes have tormented. Then, befriend and align yourself with them..

If you can find those who were once a part of the bullies’ circle but were ousted, that’s even better! These former friends likely have private and sensitive information about each of the bullies.

Moreover, they probably know some damaging info about their sycophants as well. These individuals will likely be seeking some form of retribution.

Therefore, they’ll be only too happy to give you all the juicy details!

Establish tight connections with your fellow victims. Cozy up to anyone the bullies have double-crossed. Band together with them. Why? Because nothing unites people like the shared anger and hatred toward an enemy.

Popularity and Bullying:

Establish connections with your bullies’ enemies.

Pal around with them. Eat out with them. Be sure you’re seen with as many of these victims as possible. This will provide you with a little protection!

The more targets and outcasts you connect and bond with, the better! And always have their backs and make sure they have yours!

Also, make friends, take jobs, and seize opportunities that are outside the bullies’ element. If necessary and all else fails, consider moving to a new area.

Tell no one of your plans or where you’re moving to. Sometimes, it’s just best to vanish!

Do these things, and you’ll be much safer!

This post is all about popularity and bullying, so that you know what to expect from popular bullies and ways to protect yourself from them.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Why People Reward Bullies

2. Reasons Why People Bully – 7 Most Common Motives

3. Bullying Culture: When Bullying is the Status Quo

4. Why People Bully: 11 Benefits Bullies Reap at Your Expense

why do schools protect bullies reddit

Why Do Schools Protect Bullies? 5 Common Reasons

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Why do schools protect bullies? This is the question on the minds of most school bullying victims. If you’re one of them, here are all the detailed reasons you need to know.

why do schools protect bullies

When a student is bullied and reports the abuse, many schools will protect the bullies instead of the kid who needs protection. They never hold them accountable for their bad behavior. Instead, they blame the victim.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all the answers you need to know.

Once you learn all the answers and the details around them, you will no longer need to ask, “Why do schools protect bullies?”. Moreover, you will realize that protecting yourself from bullying is your responsibility. And you will feel better about taking the initiative and standing up to your bullies.

This post will give you all the answers when you ask, “Why do schools protect bullies,” so that you will no longer let it confuse you.

Why Do Schools Protect Bullies?

If you’re bullied in school, you should follow the proper channels. You can report the bullying to your teachers and the principal. It’s only legal.

However, when you are bullied and report the abuse, many schools will only protect the bullies and blame you.

There are several reasons why schools protect bullies. However, first, let’s discuss how and why they attempt to conceal bullying.

Why do schools try to hide bullying?

Here are all the ways schools try to hide bullying.

1. They vehemently deny bullying in their facilities.

The reason they do this is to protect the school’s reputation and that of the school district. Bullying has been a topic of widespread news coverage over the last twenty-five years or so.

Moreover, the last thing any school wants is to be plastered all over the media because of a bullying incident. Therefore, they will deny that anything happened to cover it up.

2. They don’t contact the victim’s parents.

When a bully injures a child, schools often fail to report the incident to the child’s parents.  Moreover, they refuse to show any videos of bullying or fights to the bullied child’s parents. I’ve read about this many times.

Again, the reason they do this is to prevent the school’s reputation from being tarnished. Additionally, this also protects the bullies.

3. Why Do Schools Protect Bullies?

They answer any questions with vague statements or refuse to comment AT ALL.

The reason schools do this is to confuse the parents. They also do it to stonewall them and make them go away.

They think that if your parents give up, everything can go back to the way it was, and they won’t have to worry about their school’s reputation taking a hit.

4. They Retaliate against the bullied kid or their family.

When your parents get involved and refuse to shut up about the bullying, your school may retaliate. This doesn’t happen often, but it happens.

How schools retaliate against Bullied Students.

Many schools are vindictive toward bullied students and families who refuse to shut up about incidents of bullying. Here are the ways they retaliate.

1. They threaten to call Children’s Services

Schools do this to scare your parents into being quiet. If they can put you at risk of being removed from your home, they are more likely to silence you and your family.

Additionally, this shifts the negative spotlight away from the school and onto your family.

2. Why Do Schools Protect Bullies?

It’s easier to ban your parents from the school.

Parents who complain about bullying pose a threat to the school. Therefore, the school may ban the parent from school property.

If the parent is violent, then the school should ban them. However, in many cases, the parent did not resort to violence. All they did was simply bring up a bullying incident, and that was all it took for the school to ban them.

No. This doesn’t happen every day. Some schools do protect bullied kids. However, they are few and far between. And the bullying of innocent parents does happen. And it’s heartbreaking.

3. They have your parents arrested.

Again, if the parent comes to the school threatening violence and acting like a fool, I’m all for banning them and having them arrested.

However, many innocent parents have been arrested for simply addressing bullying. Sometimes this happens even if the parent handles the situation with diplomacy.

I’ve read many heartbreaking stories about similar situations.

4. Why Do Schools Protect Bullies?

It’s easier to Threaten you.

This happened to me years ago. Because I defended myself against many bullies, the staff made out an unruly child report and almost had me sent away.

Fortunately, I dodged that bullet. But many bullied victims don’t. And it’s sad.

5. They have you arrested and sent to the juvenile detention center.

I’ve read many stories of innocent bullying victims being sent away to juvenile detention because they fought their bullies in self-defense.

Unfortunately, zero-tolerance policies often fail to deter bullying. Sometimes, they get innocent kids in trouble for simply trying to defend themselves from physically violent bullies.

6. Why do schools protect bullies?

It’s easier to hide behind Sovereign Immunity.

Also, understand that schools have Sovereign Immunity and they will hide behind it. Sovereign Immunity is the stipulation that protects federal or state entities from litigation.

Therefore, it’s difficult to file a lawsuit against a school or school district. Parents have filed lawsuits against schools. And, yes, some have even won those lawsuits.

However, the statistics for successful cases are low.

This is why Sovereign Immunity for schools must be abolished. Moreover, they must be held accountable if a bullied student is maimed, murdered, or dies from suicide.

So, why do schools protect bullies?

1. Because the bullies have connections to people in power.

In other words, they are connected to local politicians and crime kingpins. This is especially true in small towns.

It’s because schools are afraid of pissing off those in power. If they suspend the bullies, their grades will likely drop.

Then, their powerful parents, who are likely to be adult bullies, would show up the next morning. They will demand to know why their little darlings were suspended.

If nothing else, know this. In most cases of bullying, it’s not about who’s right or wrong. It’s about who has the most power.

In other words, most people care less about right and wrong. What they care about is power and how you can benefit them in some way, shape, or form.

“What’s in it for me?”

2. Why do schools protect bullies?

Because the bullies often score high academically, which makes the school look good.

Schools are rated by the grades their students receive. Their graduation and dropout rates are also taken into account.

Therefore, if a school can maintain a high graduation rate and a low dropout rate, it enhances its reputation. In short, they look good.

Therefore, why would the school side with anyone other than its brightest stars and highest achievers?

If schools can crank out college candidates with high honors, all the better. And sadly, because of bullying, many targets drop out.

3. Why Do Schools Protect Bullies?

The bullies are athletes on the school sports teams.

Many bullies are stars of the school’s sports teams. Let’s face it. Schools have an interest in their sports teams.

They want to win games and to win in regional, state, and national championships. Why? Because it bolsters the school’s image.

And what school board member or principal wouldn’t want these things?

If the school has an excellent reputation, it’s likely to have a larger number of attending students. And more parents will likely want their kids to attend.

And the more students a school has, the more funding it receives from its state. Therefore, schools have a vested interest in maintaining a positive image.

4. The bullies are on the cheerleading squad and in sororities and fraternities.

Only students with good grades and high marks are accepted into these groups. So, it goes without saying. If they make superior grades, the school will protect them.

5. Why do schools protect bullies?

The bullies’ parents are boosters.

In other words, they are those who provide funding for the school’s programs. And trust me when I say that schools won’t risk losing these funders!

Therefore, schools will always side with the bullies and blame you because appealing to any entity’s self-interest equals POWER! And most victims of bullying, I’m sorry to say, don’t have the power that bullies have.

Remember that an imbalance of power is a primary characteristic of bullying.

6. The bullies suck up to faculty.

Like it or not, most people in power love being sucked up to. Teachers and school officials are no exception. Therefore, sucking up gives bullies many brownie points.

And school staff will protect bullies. And they will do it out of loyalty.

Why do schools protect bullies?

Schools THAT bully parents

Schools have more power than you realize. If their reputation is at risk, they will do anything to silence you and your family. They will take measures to prevent anything bad from getting out.

Sadly, many parents of bullied kids are single. And they are raising children on one paycheck. How do they fight against such powerful entities?

Understand that school officials are elected officials- politicians. And schools will protect their reputations at all costs.

How Parents can protect their children from bullying

1. Put in for a school transfer.

Although not always feasible, transferring your child to a new school is one of the best things you can do for them. A transfer will give them a fresh start with a clean slate.

And, because they’ve had no history with the other students at the new school, it will be much easier for them to make friends there.

However, what if you can’t afford it? Luckily, there’s a government program called school choice. With the school choice program, you get vouchers to send your child to any school they want to attend, even a private school.

Ways you can appeal to the school’s interests and level the playing field

If you can find a way to appeal to the school’s self-interest, then you have an ace in the hole. Here are ways you can do it!

1. Excel and keep your grades up.

I realize that this can be hard to do when you’re a target of relentless bullying. Bullying can break your concentration.

Instead of focusing on schoolwork, you naturally focus on ways to be safe. That’s completely understandable. However, you must make your bullies your motivation to excel.

There’s nothing wrong with compensating. And sometimes you must compensate to buffer your self-esteem and protect your mental health.

Therefore, if you lack friends and social connections, compensate for this by excelling in academics and improving your class performance.

It will pay huge dividends. And you’ll feel so much better about yourself.

3. Find ways to benefit the school with your talents and gifts.

If you can use your talents to bolster the school’s image, that’s a win for you. And the school will more likely support and protect you from bullies.

If you can sing, join the school choir and win in the all-state championships. Not only will you look good, but your school will also look good!

In closing:

It’s a fact that most schools ignore bullying and protect bullies. Bullies get away with bullying all the time, and some teachers may join in on the torment. It’s heartbreaking.

But don’t give up. There are things you can do to protect yourself.

This post answered the question, “Why do schools protect bullies” to get rid of any confusion and bewilderment you might have.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Why do Schools Ignore Bullying? 7 Reasons Schools Do Nothing

2. Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying? 15 Must-Know Answers 

3. Bullying by Teachers in School: 7 Steps to Protect Yourself

sub-types of bullies and how to deal with them

Sub-types of Bullies: 7 Personalities of Bullies

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Understanding the sub-types of bullies is crucial. It’s not just about knowing there are types of bullies, but also recognizing the sub-types. Here’s everything you need to know to protect yourself.

sub-types of bullies

Types of bullies include physical bullies, verbal bullies, cyberbullies, social bullies, and so on. With sub-types, we go deeper.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn about all the sub-types of bullies so that you can easily identify them when they come for you.

Once you learn all about these categories of bullies, you will be better equipped to defend yourself from bullying and ensure your safety.

This post is all about the sub-types of bullies so that you know who they are and can better protect yourself.

Sub-types of Bullies

Bullies come in different kinds. You can never assume how your bullies will react, as different people respond to other things in various ways.

Speak out against and expose some bullies, and they might leave you alone. Talk about others, and they’ll go to the ends of the earth to get back at you.

Therefore, you must tailor your defense strategies to the particular bully you’re dealing with. To do this, you must be able to distinguish the blowhards from the truly vindictive.

You must differentiate between the smart and the foolish. You must also separate the aggressive and the passive-aggressive.

Never deal blindly with bullies. Why? Because if you handle them willy-nilly, you’ll be at their mercy. And they’ll toss you around like a tornado tosses debris.

To successfully combat bullying, it is essential to recognize the various personality types. Otherwise, you won’t survive.

Here are all the personality types (sub-types) of bullies you likely deal with.

1. Bullies with Narcissism

They may try to hide it. However, their self-importance gives them away. They have excessive pride and an overly inflated sense of entitlement.

All this combined makes them dangerous. They believe they are beyond reproach. Therefore, if they think for a moment that you slighted them, they will pay you back with severe brutality.

Logic and rationality don’t apply to these people. They overreact to what even looks like opposition.

Sub-Types of Bullies:

All you don’t have to do anything to them for them to come after you.

You don’t have to provoke them. In fact, you don’t have to do anything at all. All you have to do is be good at something. In other words, if you outdo them at anything, they’ll take offense to it.

They’ll call you a showoff and take it as you’re trying to be better than them. And they’ll make you pay dearly. If you get recognition for a project well done, these people won’t tolerate it. They hate being in anyone’s shadow!

Bullies with narcissism are usually in the popular crowd at school or in management at work.

Don’t bother trying to second-guess them. Avoid them like the plague! Because they live to cause pain.

It’s in their psychology.

2. Sub-Types of Bullies:

Arrogant Bullies

Arrogant bullies don’t have to have narcissism. Why? Because, in many cases, arrogance comes from insecurity. People may put on an air of arrogance to hide their insecurities.

This kind of bully may have low self-esteem, but they hide that by acting like they’re better than you.

They are a close second to the bullies with narcissism. The only thing that separates them from the narcs is that the narcs really do think they’re superior.

However, the arrogant bullies want you to think they’re superior.

These bullies are harder to spot and less violent. Like those with narcissism, they have extremely fragile egos.

They are highly insecure. Moreover, if they dislike you, they’ll attack in small nibbles. You won’t realize it until they begin taking bigger swipes at you.

These bullies are usually the wannabes. They are groupies to the popular crowd at school or the suck-ups to management at work.

Avoid these people as well because they will bully you to prove their worth to the popular crowd.

3. Suspicious Bullies

These bullies only see the worst in you. They see you as a threat and think that you’re out to get them when you aren’t.

Suspicious bullies aren’t as dangerous as the previous two. You can fool these bullies much easier. And sometimes you must resort to trickery to protect yourself.

To counter these bullies, you must use their suspicions and turn them to someone else. As long as they’re bullying someone else, they’re leaving you alone.

4. Sub-Types of Bullies:

Those with photographic memories

These bullies never forget you. If you were to run into them again 30 years later, you can bet that they will target you again. They’ll pick up where they left off.

If you’re a target of these bullies, they won’t show their hatred outwardly. But they will keep their eyes on you.

They’ll lie in wait as they plot. Then, when the time is right, they’ll exact their brutality with a frigid coldness. These bullies are usually stoic.

To protect yourself, you must punish these bullies so severely that they won’t even think of coming for you again.

5. Bullies who aren’t very bright

These individuals are easy to counter and won’t anticipate your counterattack. These are the bullies you can most easily defend yourself against. Also, they’re easy to expose.

Again, you must know your bullies if you expect to overcome them. Knowing your bullies means understanding their personalities and being able to predict their future actions.

Only then will you be able to protect yourself against them.

6. Sub-Types of Bullies:

Passive-Aggressive Bullies

These types of bullies are slick with their attacks. They catch you off guard, taunting you in such a way that it can be tricky to figure out if it’s you they’re aiming their attacks at.

Sometimes, you don’t even know until it’s too late for you to deliver a good comeback.

Why? Because the bully may not necessarily address it to you. In other words, you may not know they’re talking about you.

However, bystanders will immediately know who the covert nastiness was meant for. It’s funny how we tend to see so much clearer from the outside.

What’s so terrible about this is that the stealthy insults are usually hurled at you in front of an audience. And they can quickly fly over your head.

As a result, you end up looking like a clueless idiot for not catching it in time. The bully’s words are vague and unclear. But they’ll still nibble at your self-esteem.

Passive-aggressive bullies are cowards.

They take a chunk out of your pride, whether you want them to or not. Why? Because you usually figure it out sooner or later. It only goes to prove how vicious these covert attacks can be.

The bully and a few others think they’re being cute and witty. And they slap you with burn after burn. However, see these people for who they are and why they’re so slick with their mouths.

They’re nothing but cowards. Why? Because they lack the courage to make a direct attack. They’re afraid of how you might respond, so they hit you with sneak attacks to stun you into silence.

Here’s how you protect yourself from these creeps. Learn to read between the lines. Also, learn to read the room when they get slick-mouthed with you.

Also, listen to your gut. If you have a bad feeling in the pit of your stomach, don’t ignore it.

Watch the people around you. Notice their reactions. Also pay attention to any clusters. If you see any of these expressions below, you are the target of the insult.

  • Witnesses’ eyes suddenly widen and they immediately look at you funny after the bully opens his mouth
  • They alternate uncomfortable glances from the bully to you, then back to the bully.
  • You hear light gasps and grunts of shock from the “audience.”
  • Their faces suddenly change and mouths slightly gape open.
  • You hear soft but derisive giggles, chuckles, or laughter
  • You see or hear snickering

If you notice any of these things, let the bully have it!

7. Sub-Types of Bullies:

Those who are easily Offended

For people who love to dish out the bullshit, bullies are the most easily offended. They have such fragile egos that it takes zero effort to offend them.

Understand that people who are easily offended take things completely out of context. They attach meaning to your behavior when it’s completely devoid of personal meaning.

Even if you are neutral, these bullies will find ways to turn it into a personal affront or confrontation.

With these pansies, it’s always:

  • “She doesn’t agree with everything I say, do, and think, so that means she doesn’t like me!”
  • “He has a different opinion than me, so that means he’s looking down his nose at me!”
  • “She doesn’t like the same things I like, so that means she hates me!”

When they do this, they presume to know what you’re thinking and feeling.

In Closing

In life, you will run into all kinds of bullies. This is why you must understand their personality types so that you can better predict their behavior. Then, you can tailor your defense tactics

This post was all about the sub-Types of bullies so that you can predict their next move and tailor your defense against them.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Bullying and Narcissism: 7 Secret Powers of Narcopathic Bullies

2. Sadistic Personality: Bullies who Bully for Pleasure 

comebacks for bullies at school

Comebacks for Bullies: 12 Phrases that Shut Them Up

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‘Want to know the best comebacks for bullies so that you can shut them up for good? Here are all the burning clap-backs you need to know about.

comebacks for bullies

Bullies are forever on the attack. They are pretty inventive when it comes to verbal sparring. Sadly, many victims get stumped because they can’t think of anything to counter the verbal abuse.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn several comebacks you can use to get them to shut up and leave you alone once and for all.

Once you learn these clap-backs, you will lessen the chances of them coming for you again. Additionally, your confidence will receive a significant boost.

This post provides a list of comebacks for bullies, so you can give them a dose of their own medicine and force them to go away for good.

Comebacks for Bullies

Understand that bullies thrive on power and control. Therefore, if they can’t control you, they’ll control how others view you. This is why they like to throw cute little zingers and burns at you in front of an audience.

They want to diminish you in the eyes of others.

Also, they’ll use redundancy and repetition to make you believe their lies, too. Here’s what they say to brainwash you into seeing yourself through their eyes. Also, here’s what you should come back with.

Examples

1. Bullies: “Apart from us, you can do nothing, you are nothing, and you never will be.”

You: “Apart from you, I’m better off. I can do anything I set my mind to do, and who are you to make predictions?”

When you respond this way, you completely counter the bully’s statement. In that, you buffer your self-esteem and confidence. They may not stop talking. They may even repeat themselves.

However, the important thing is that you countered their attack. You didn’t take it lying down. So, you dealt a blow, and that’s what matters.

2. Bullies: “You’ll never find happiness.”

You: “Really? Why’s that? Because you never found any? I don’t need your permission to be happy. I’m much happier without losers like you.”

3. Bullies: “Nobody will ever like you.”

You: “And who’s ‘nobody?’ You? Maybe you never will, but I don’t mind because you don’t matter.”

4. Bullies: “You’re nothing without our approval.”

You: “I’m nothing with it because you are nothing. I don’t need your approval.

Always counter your bullies’ verbal attacks. Even counter the unspoken ones. You’ll be surprised at what it’ll do for your self-esteem and spirit!

Comebacks for bullies:

Universal comebacks you can use to counter any verbal attack.

1. If I want to hear from an ass, I’ll fart.

2. Were you born a jackass or did you have to work at it?

3. Take a break. You don’t have to be a moron every day of your life.

With the above three comebacks, you are insulting the bully’s intelligence. Making someone out to be an idiot is worse than yelling and cursing them out. Why? Because you can be calm and cool as a cucumber when you counter with these kinds of comebacks.

4. Boneheads like you are the reason abortion is legal.

Not only are you calling the bully an idiot, you’re also sending the message that the world would be a better place if they weren’t around. Therefore, this is a two-in-one.

Comebacks that weaponize your bully’s emotions.

5. Are you mad? Fix your face, sweetie.

This is a great counter-jab because it highlights your bully’s anger. Also, you get to take their outrage and rub their noses in it. Now, who doesn’t love that?

6. You’re not a happy person, are you?

When you come back with this, you’re letting the bully and everyone else within earshot know that they’re a miserable human being. Ouch!

Moreover, this is embarrassing to bullies, and they’ll likely quickly leave you alone and find someone else to jerk around.

Comebacks for bullies:

Calling out their behavior.

7. Are you so miserable that you have to put someone else down to feel better about yourself?

By saying this, you’re not only calling out their behavior, you’re exposing the bully as the pathetic loser they are. Anyone who must berate others to feel powerful can’t be about much.

Therefore, you instill some shame into the bullies, and they’ll likely decide that you aren’t the one they want to tangle with.

8. You can’t insult me. I’d have to care about your opinions first.

With this little gem of a comeback, you’re telling your bullies that they’re wasting their breath on you. And if you’re a bully, it’s nowhere near as fun to take pot shots at someone who doesn’t give a damn what you think.

In fact, it takes the wind out of a bully’s sails. Remember that bullies are counting on a big, emotional reaction from you. And when you calmly counter them with this little firecracker, you take the fun out of the game.

Therefore, they’ll decide that you aren’t worth the energy and find an easier target.

When Using these comebacks, remember to use them calmly.

9. Why are you so obsessed with me? That’s creepy, and I don’t like you that way.

This is a great clap-back because you’re humiliating the bullies by highlighting their obsession with you. Also, you’re making it look to bystanders as though they are romantically interested in you, but don’t know how else to get your attention.

10. You must bully people to compensate for your shoe size.

The most effective counter-jab is to reframe the bully’s behavior as a response to a shortcoming.  When you do it this way, you can reduce the bully’s power and make them look foolish if an audience is present.

11. You need to stop outing yourself.

This is a good one because you make it seem to others as if your bullies are projecting their issues onto you. And, in most cases of bullying, they are.

12. Whatever.

You can use this little one-word wonder in almost any verbal situation. Also, it can be used as a response to any verbal attack.

A cool response of “whatever” is the comeback of the ages! It’s short and sweet, and it’s the perfect blow-off to any bully.

Comebacks for Bullies:

The less words you use, the better!

Let’s face it, being blown off with this magic word is a real pisser-offer to every bully. Why? Because they’re looking for a big reaction from you. Any time you calmly make this little response, it sends the message to the bully that they bore you. Ouch!

Another reason this little beauty of a word infuriates bullies so much is that there’s no good comeback to counter it. It stops them dead in their tracks and leaves them looking nine kinds of dimwitted!

Bullies may verbally retaliate with a “whatever” of their own, but it will only make them look unoriginal and childish. The trick with this comeback is to strike first. Why? Because he who says it first automatically wins the day!

More Comebacks for bullies.

For example, your bully may ask you, “‘You want to fight me?”  Then, you can say, “I would but shit splatters.”

If your bully tells you to get a life, you say, “Like yours? Nah. I’ll pass.”

If the bully tells you that you’re an arrogant jerk, you could say, “That’s a compliment coming from you.”

And, if the bully tells you that your shirt looks like it’s from the Salvation Army, you could come back with, “Oh, you shop there too, huh?”

If a bully flips you off, you could say, “Behind every bird is a pile of shit.”

In Closing

If you’re a target of bullying, I cannot stress how important it is for you to have a few zingers filed away in the back of your mind. Moreover, you must be quick! You must be able to think on your feet!

With these comebacks, you will look calm, cool, and collected while making your bullies look defeated.

You will throw your bullies off balance. You will infuriate them so much that they won’t be able to think straight. They will probably react out of emotion. And when they do that, they will only expose themselves.

Moreover, you will instantly boost your self-esteem and save your mental health from any damage that verbal bullying can cause.

So, put this in your little toolbox, because with these comebacks, you can’t go wrong! Just remember to say it calmly and coolly. Then watch your bullies’ reactions as they search and stumble to find a comeback without repeating you and looking utterly ridiculous.

Once you learn how to disarm bullies, you will throw them for a loop and discourage them from ever coming for you again.

This post was all about comebacks for bullies so that you can be ready with a quick counter-jab when your bullies come at you with verbal abuse, and you can save your self-esteem and overall mental health.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How to Disarm a Bully: 13 Clever Comebacks that Work Wonders

2. How to Shut Down a Bully: 11 Comebacks that Stop Them Cold

3.  Phrases to Shut Down a Gaslighter: 9 Powerful Statements to Use

4. How to Respond to Darvo: 7 Powerful Ways to Shut it Down 

tearing the mask off the bully at work

Tearing the Mask off the Bully: 3 Tools That Build Their Facade

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Tearing the mask off the bully isn’t easy. Therefore, do you want to know the real people behind the fake facades bullies put up? Here are all the details you need to know.

tearing the mask off the bully

The reality for many victims of bullying is that they seem to be the only person in the world who knows the real people behind the masks their bullies wear.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn how to tear the mask of the bully so that you can not only expose them for the creeps they are, but also preserve your good name and ensure your safety.

Once you learn all about this game-changing information, you will be able to easily expose bullies who try to play victim and use charm to fool others.

This post is all about tearing the mask off the bully so that you can expose your bullies and ensure your safety.

Tearing the mask of the bully

Realizing the truth about your bully is not always easy. Sadly, it seems that the more fake a person appears to be, the more others adore them. On the other hand, the more real a person is, the more others hate them.

The reason for this is that the truth scares most folks. The truth is uncomfortable, even painful. As the old quote goes, “It’s much easier to fool others than to convince them that they’ve been fooled.”

Bullies have a way of using seductive charm and drawing others to them. They have a knack for making others like, even love them. These individuals are exceptionally skilled at forming connections with everyone.

Bullies will agree with everyone on anything and tell others what they want to hear. They say all the right things at the right times. They’re the best actors in the business, and sometimes it’s hard to see the snake behind the charm.

This is how workplace bullies get promoted in the workplace. It’s how school bullies become the teacher’s pets and the school’s sacred cows. It’s how bullies are liked and yes, even loved by unsuspecting others.

Bullies Thrive on Deception

It’s frustrating, isn’t it? When you know a person is fake, yet others think they’re the best thing since sliced bread?

The person is evil, manipulative, and lies without a conscience, yet nobody knows it but you. Why? Because you’re the only one who sees that side of them.

You notice the real person behind the facade of charisma, smiles, and waves. Plain as day, you watch them take pleasure in hurting others and ruining lives. At the same time, these bullies have a talent for sucking everyone else in by their fakery.

For example, A high school bully boy beats up a smaller kid on the ball field. As a result, all the girls who watch from the bleachers love him for it.

Or, maybe the bully gropes an innocent girl in the hallway. And he does it, knowing that she clearly does not want them touching her.

But, sadly, the female admirers who hang with them only laugh and signal approval. After all, the girl the creep groped is “a slut who was asking for it.” Right?

You can almost see what they’re thinking as you watch their eyes and their body language.

“Wow! What a man!”

Tearing the mask off the bully:

Bullies can don their masks but Can’t Survive Without Putting Someone Else Down

Take, for instance, the workplace bully. She seems so in control, so smart, and so attractive when she’s berating another employee for a minor mistake. Or, maybe she’s attacking another, more talented person to undermine their abilities.

These are the type of folks who are blind to their own selfishness. They tell lie after lie and ruin life after life.

They lack consideration for others and aren’t responsible for their own screw-ups. However, they have no qualms about pointing out the mistakes and imperfections of others.  Additionally, they have no problem projecting their issues onto someone else.

What’s even more baffling is that you’d think that once this creep dumps on enough people, others would begin to see through their smokescreens. However!

Au contraire! Some of them keep going back after being dumped on, only to have the bully rub it in. It’s enough to make you sick.

The Idiocy of The Bully’s Followers

You may try to warn others about the real person behind the facade. Also, you may defend yourself when they attack you, but others take their word and their side over yours.

Moreover, you hear others talk, saying what a fine, upstanding person the bully is. Furthermore, they don’t know the person. You and only a few others know. Therefore, it’s hard to bite your tongue when you hear it.

The bully can be so horribly evil that if he stood side by side with the devil himself, you’d have a hard time distinguishing between the two. Furthermore, this person puts on the pathetic but convincing act of being bullied when they’re the ones doing the bullying.

It’s amazing how easily the people around you are fooled! But realize that not only the bully, but the weak and gullible followers who enable the bully, need professional help.

Tearing the mask of the bully:

Those Who Surround the Bully are Followers, Nothing More.

Understand that these bullies are toxic souls and wastes of space. They’re the people who struggle to maintain a relationship. Eventually, these bullies get a little too prideful, a little too bold…then they get sloppy!

They screw up somehow, the mask falls off, and finally! Everyone sees their true colors!

I’ve seen this happen, and I won’t lie to you. It gave me a sense of justice, and I was ecstatic when I watched them fall. Karma is a booger!

3 Ingredients Bullies Use to Build Their Image of Perfection

We all know that bullies are cowards who hide behind a facade. But what makes that facade? What are the exact ingredients that make up the bully’s facade?

Bullies are like peacocks. They like to strut around and fan out their tails, displaying their most vibrant colors.

And they do this to collect admirers, followers, and allies. That’s exactly what the bully’s facade is used for. And bullies are skilled at deceiving their peers into believing that they’re perfect and untouchable.

Only you know what’s behind the masks. Victims know the real personalities these masks hide. So, again, what exactly are the ingredients that bullies use to build their carefully crafted facades and promote those fake images?

1. Tearing the Mask off the Bully:

Impeccable Attire.

Most seasoned and well-practiced bullies dress in the best and latest fashions. These creeps love to be pleasing to the eyes.

Why? Because they understand that most humans are materialistic and obsessed with beauty. They also understand that everything is based on appearances.

So, they wear the fanciest clothes, the trendiest hairstyles, and the sexiest makeup.

They showcase these things to present themselves in the best possible light. Moreover, they give the impression that they’re rolling in money and have the perfect life, all to impress others. Most of all, bullies do it to make themselves appear better than others.

Many of them don’t have a pot to pee in or a window to throw it out. Not that being poor makes a person bad, but!

Most bullies will go flat broke buying fancy clothes and sporty cars to pimp around town in to keep up a fake persona. And they’ll be up to their eyeballs in debt.

As a result, many of these types constantly struggle to pay or fail to pay their bills.

They’re the types who will run to mommy and daddy for bailouts and handouts. Yet they continue to spend a fortune on clothes, hairstyles, manicures, pedicures, facials, cosmetic surgeries, and more.

Facades are challenging to maintain.

Many workplace bullies have committed crimes such as theft, embezzlement, and forgery. All because they lived way beyond their means. They got their butts in a crack they couldn’t get out of. And they got caught!

2. Tearing the mask off the Bully:

They put on a good show.

Seasoned bullies are also the best showmen. They put on an act to gain admiration, support, or sympathy.

They make grand gestures. They’re skilled at reading people and determining their likes and dislikes, as well as deciphering how they react to various stimuli. They are fully aware of the people and moods around them and adapt to them.

You’ll often find these bullies standing in the very center of the rooms they’re in. Also, they’re the types who despise being outshone, outsmarted, or outdone.

3. Bullies are master wordsmiths.

They use clichés, euphemisms, and loaded words to impress others with their speech. They also use big words to prove how smart they are when, in reality, they’re as incompetent as they come.

And they tell others what they want to hear and say everything with conviction. This is why bullies are such convincing liars and so good at making you look like the bad guy.

But here’s something else you need to know.

Although seasoned bullies are very popular among people, they’re also hated and feared by rivals and enemies. And they do eventually get brought down. I’ve seen it happen many times.

Julius Caesar was one such example.

“Caesar had his Brutus and Charles I, his Cromwell…” – Patrick Henry.

Abraham Lincoln quoted, “You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time. But you can’t fool all of the people all of the time.”

You can easily outsmart and expose bullies. It just takes strategy.

Eventually, the masks fall off and facades crack. Facades and just those. Facades! And no matter how much the bully may play the victim and put on fronts, others eventually find them out!

This post was all about tearing the mask off the bully to assure you that bullies always end up being discovered for who they are.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Bullies and Victim-Mentality: 9 Behaviors of Bullies Who Play Victim

2. How to Outsmart a Bully: 1 Proven Strategy.

3.  How to Outsmart Bullies: 4 Unconventional Ways to Do So

4. 7 Secrets to Instantly Expose Bullies

Punished for Defending Yourself: What You Can Do

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Want to know why you get punished for defending yourself and what you can do? Here are all the details you need to know.

punished for defending yourself

Sadly, many victims of bullying end up getting punished for defending themselves. Therefore, in this post, you will learn why you get punished for defending yourself if you’re a victim of bullying. Also, you will learn what you can do about it.

Once you learn all this vital information, you will be able to push back effectively and protect your right to self-preservation.

This post is all about why you get punished for defending yourself and what you can do to assert your rights to safety.

Punished for Defending Yourself

You can take a lot of crap from bullies and no one else says a word. However, once you get sick of the bullshit and begin defending yourself, suddenly, they are surprised! But not only are they surprised, they’re pissed off.

It’s like, “How dare you,” and “Who do you think you are!” That is essentially what everyone else thinks once you stand up to bullies.

Bullies not only CONDITION you to Accept Bigger and More Severe Abuses, they condition bystanders to get comfortable with seeing it.

Gradualism and Incrementalism- drop by drop, bullies start by taking teeny-weeny bites out of your self-esteem. They take it up ever so slowly and step by itsy-bitsy step.

In fact, they escalate it so slowly and so subtly that it isn’t noticeable. Yet you feel that something is off and that something doesn’t feel good. But you can’t quite put a finger on it. It’s that subtle!

But here’s your first clue: Your body will know if you pay attention to it. When you meet your bullies for the first time, you will pick up some pretty creepy vibes from these people, and you’ll feel it in the pit of your stomach.

You’ll sense something about these creeps that feels “off.” And sometimes, you’ll feel it before the first words are exchanged. You will sense them watching your every move, scoping you out, studying you like a specimen.

You may look up from whatever you’re doing or turn around. Then you’ll see, out of the corner of your eye, a few of these people eyeing you from a distance.

Then you’ll see them look at each other and smirk. And, when they do, you’ll also notice that eerie twinkle in their eyes. You might even notice a micro-flash or two of contempt. Don’t ignore this!

Understand that these bullies are sizing you up and probing to see how you respond or react. But, more importantly, these bullies are slowly conditioning you and everyone else that it is normal for them to bully you.

Punished for Defending Yourself:

Bullies Always size you up at first.

Next, bullies start committing slightly bigger violations. Understand that bullies do this deliberately to soften you. Again, they start by making the abuse almost unrecognizable. That is, until it isn’t anymore.

By the time you recognize it, the abuse is so out of control that your bullies can’t help themselves. And they don’t even try to hide it anymore.

Why continue to put in the work to hide something you’ve gotten away with for so long that there’s no incentive to stop? Right?

By the time the abuse becomes obvious, it’s usually too late because everyone has grown accustomed to bullying you. And once they’ve grown accustomed to it, it’s almost impossible for you to get them to leave you alone, no matter what you do to protect yourself.

Therefore, when you finally get fed up and begin asserting yourself, bullies and everyone else become outraged. You must understand that they don’t give a crap about your pain. Why? Because you’re their target and they intend for you to stay that way.

They get a psychological reward from bullying you. And hell will freeze over before they give that up. This is why, at this stage, bullies respond with anger and resentment when you finally stand up to them.

Bullies have big egos. And when ego is involved, bullies become offended when someone they deem inferior finally develops a backbone. Therefore, they’ll do everything they can to break your will. And they’ll do it to keep getting their sick, sadistic jollies.

The unspoken message is, “How dare you take away our fun!”

Punished for defending yourself:

This is why you should always put a stop to it in the early stages.

Conditioning always starts small. Therefore, you must stand up to it in the early stages. You must know how to recognize it when it is barely recognizable.

Why? Because the longer bullying goes on, the more severe the abuses become. And the bigger the violations get, the harder it is to defend yourself and put a stop to it. I can’t stress this enough!

And how you recognize it is by listening to your body, because your body will feel it. You’ll also sense it in the vibes the people put out. So, pay close attention.

Bullies Want You TO BE Dependent on their approval.

Deep down, many targets are brainwashed into thinking that they must depend on their bullies for something. It’s true. I know this leaves you scratching your head. You may ask, “Depend on bullies? For what?”

Your bullies want you to be dependent on their approval and acceptance. They want to have control over your ability to meet people and make friends. In short, they want to have power over your social life.

It’s how they keep you begging for it. They dangle carrots of acceptance to keep you under their thumb and doing what they want you to do.

Punished for Defending Yourself:

Domestic Abusers Do the same to their PARTNERS.

Think about it. Domestic abusers do the same to their abused partners. They keep them dependent to maintain control and domination over them.

Only spousal abusers keep their victims dependent on financial resources. How? They do so by controlling the purse strings. They withhold money from them. Also, they shut down opportunities for the partner to make their own money by forbidding them from working.

Another control tactic of the spousal abuser is cutting the partner off from their family and friends. They do this to cut their partner off from any support they may get from them.

Again, know the early signs of bullying and abuse. If you defend yourself in the early stages, others are less likely to punish you for it.

Why? Because they haven’t gotten comfortable with seeing others bullying you yet.

Abuse is abuse, whether it comes in the form of bullying in school or the workplace, or domestic abuse in the home.

Oppressive Governments do the same to their CONSTITUENCIES. 

Socialist and Communist governments also do the same to their citizenry. They manipulate events and media narratives. Moreover, they deliberately crash their countries’ economies to force the people to become dependent on them.

They even set up terrorist regimes to beat any dissenters into submission and burn their homes and businesses. This is nothing new. Those in power have used these tactics throughout history!

And they have done it solely to wrest control of the people’s behavior, thoughts, and very lives. Why? Because if you can keep someone dependent on you, you can make rules for them to follow.

In other words, you can tell them what to do and have complete domination over their lives. You can also force them to put up with the most unspeakable and evil of abuses. And you can silence them by keeping them in a state of fear.

You can make them afraid that you will withdraw whatever it is they need from you. With bullies, it is approval, acceptance, and the ability to make friends with others. With spousal abusers, it is love, money, or even food and medicine to keep you alive.

And with government despots, it’s basic needs like food, water, and other vital resources. And they can have complete control over every aspect of your life if they can keep you dependent on them for your very safety and survival.

Again, it always starts small. So, defend yourself before others have time to grow accustomed to it. This way, you won’t wait too long and get punished for it.

Punished for Defending Yourself:

Bullies will strip you of freedom and autonomy if you let them.

Understand that when control freaks use these methods of control, they strip you of your freedom and autonomy. They keep you too afraid to be your own person and exercise your human rights.

Also, they take away your ability to speak freely, be creative with your life, and flourish. They also keep you too afraid to stand up to them, call them out on their abuse, and assert your God-given right not to be controlled and abused.

The controlling person does this by keeping you under the threat that they will retaliate and unleash even worse pain on you if you disobey or step out of line.

The problem with this is that bullies, abusers, and oppressive governments only get drunk on their power. You can never satisfy them, and they can never get enough power. They must always up the ante and take more and more control.

Reasons You Get Punished for Defending yourself

Here’s something you need to realize. In your bullies’ minds, you’re only here for their convenience, their purpose, their agenda, and their pleasure. Never your own.

They need you to stay powerless. In other words, they need the scales of power to keep tipping in their favor.

Therefore, when you defend yourself against a bully, you automatically restore the balance of power. In other words, you reclaim your power. You snatch back the very thing your bullies are trying to keep from you.

When this happens, your bullies panic! Why? Because they feel that if they lose power over you, they’ll lose power over everyone else.

As a result, they will lose face. The bullies will lose respect, credibility, allies, and support. Then, they will become the bullied.

Bullies fear becoming targets.

Bullies have an obsessive fear of going from hunters to the hunted. And why not? You aren’t the only person they’ve bullied. There were many others before you. Moreover, bullies know all too well that most average people hate people like them.

They also know that most love to see bullies get their comeuppance. And once someone brings a bully down, no one will ever allow that bully to get up again.

This is why bullies will go to great lengths to keep you under control. If they cannot control you, they control nothing. Most people are still under the presumption that victims are weak. Therefore, if a victim stands up to a bully, others will see that and the bully will be at everyone else’s mercy.

Others will look at the failed bully and think, “Wow! If he can’t handle a wimp like them, then he really couldn’t handle me! This is a juicy opportunity! I can punk this creep out so easily!”

The bully then becomes the new man on the bottom. Gasp! Because if they can’t overpower the person who’s deemed the weakest link in the bunch, then they become the new weakest link! Ouch! Talk about a humbling situation!

Punished for Defending Yourself:

Bullies fear becoming the new man on the bottom.

Therefore, the bully and everyone else punish you for daring to defend yourself once the bullying reaches the late stages. And with each provocation from the bully and each counter you deliver, the more determined they are to tip the scales of power back in their favor.

With your counter jab comes pain and humiliation for bullies. Therefore, the human reflex is always to punish or eliminate the cause of that pain and humiliation.

When you stand up to a bully, they feel vulnerable because you just upset that power imbalance. Therefore, the bully punishes you to restore the power imbalance.

What do you do?

In a situation like this, you have three choices: either keep defending yourself with counterattacks or give up and feel even worse about yourself later. Or, you can leave the toxic environment altogether.

My advice is to defend yourself. However, you must punish the bully so severely that they won’t ever want to mess with you again. You must give the bully a traumatic memory they never want to relive.

It’s the only way they will stop. And if you can’t do this, then the next best thing to do is to remove yourself from the environment and relocate to a place where you can live in peace.

This post is all about what happens when you’re punished for defending yourself and what you can do about it.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Defending Yourself from Bullies: 11 Best Defenses 

2. Self-Preservation Instinct: Defending Yourself from Bullies is Okay!

3. The 4 Stages of Bullying 

4. Bullying and Psychological Conditioning 

5. Conditioning: 5 Signs You’re Being Conditioned 

Excuses Schools Make for Bullies: Here are 7 Most Common

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‘Want to know all the excuses schools make for bullies? If you’re the parent of a bullied child, here are all the excuses you need to prepare yourself for.

excuses schools make for bullies

Many schools shirk responsibility when bullying occurs. And sadly, they usually protect the bullies. They either blame the victim or hide incidents of bullying altogether.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn about the excuses schools make for bullies so that you will know what to expect and be prepared for them.

Once you learn all about these popular responses, you will know what to expect when you report your bullies for bullying you.

This post is all about the excuses schools make for bullies, so that you will know what to expect and be ready for it.

Excuses schools make for bullies

There are news articles everywhere with stories of schools that failed to notify parents when their child was seriously injured by bullies. Moreover, there are even stories of schools that neglected to call 911 when a kid desperately needed medical attention.

Every day, schools pretend not to notice when they see bullies making some innocent student’s life hell. Instead, they turn a deaf ear and blame the victim when they report the bullying.

In extreme cases, schools have retaliated against the victim’s family because they wouldn’t keep their mouth shut. And, they usually retaliated by making false claims to CPS and having the child unfairly removed from their home. Therefore, they only break up entire families!

The reasons school officials resort to this kind of evil are to save the school’s reputation. Therefore, they do everything possible to make the victim’s family look bad and hide the bullying that is rampant in their schools.

It is because of this that parents lose trust in the public school system. And I don’t blame them. In recent years, homeschooling has skyrocketed. Should it be any wonder?

You must realize that school officials are elected officials, politicians! And when bullying happens and schools fail to act, you can best believe that politics is behind it. Teachers and principals would rather make excuses for bullies than protect the bullied child.

Here are the most common excuses schools make for bullies.

1. “Kids will be Kids.”

“Yep. And some of them can be real hellions, like this one right here,” you say as you point to your bully.

Many teachers, principals, and even the bullies’ parents will use this excuse to sweep incidents of bullying under the rug. They also use this line to trivialize any bullying the targeted student suffers.

The “kids will be kids” response is a cop out. And it’s designed to protect only the bullies, not the child who needs the protection.

Know that school officials have a legal responsibility to keep kids out of harm’s way while they’re at school, all kids. Not just a select few. But most neglect that responsibility.

Therefore, see this as one of many excuses. In most cases, it doesn’t pay to wait for the school to help you. Sometimes, you must take responsibility for your own safety and stand up to your bullies.

2. “It’s just a personality conflict”

“You got that right. Her personality sucks and mine doesn’t. There’s the conflict.”

When your teacher or principal tells you that the altercation between you and your bully is a personality conflict, see this excuse for what it is. They’re only trying to downplay the bullying you suffer.

Realize that bullying has become an ugly word nowadays. The very term, bullying, raises a lot of heckles. Moreover, it stirs up a lot of bad emotions. It’s no wonder that school officials cringe just hearing it.

Therefore, school staff won’t even mention the word “bullying.”  They won’t say that what you endure is bullying. Why? Because they would have to admit that bullying goes on in their school, and they can’t do that!

Therefore, they call it a personality conflict because that doesn’t sound as bad.

But, continue to call it what it is. They may not like it. But your priority is not to spare their feelings. It’s to keep yourself from harm.

3. Excuses Schools make for Bullies:

“That’s just the way she is.”

“Really? Then she needs to stay the hell away from me.”

That may very well be how your bully is. However, you don’t have to put up with their bullshit. Therefore, don’t accept any excuses from the school or the bully.

You must see the subtext of this excuse. And the subtext of it is, “This kind of behavior is typical of her. So, you should overlook her.”

But don’t overlook it. Stand up to your bully and put her in her place! Let her know in no uncertain terms that you won’t take her crap.

Also, let your school staff know that they’re the adults and they’re supposed to protect bullied students. Then, tell them that they’re not doing their jobs.

And, when you say it, say it point-blank!

4. “They’ve had a hard life.”

“Most people have, but not all of them use it as an excuse to treat others like crap.”

Just because your bully has had it rough doesn’t give them an excuse to abuse you. It’s okay to have empathy for those who are having a tough time.

However, when they use it as a crutch, that’s when the empathy stops! Their feelings are valid, yes. But their evil actions aren’t.

You can feel sorry for them if you want. However, that doesn’t mean you have to let them use you as a dumping ground for all their issues.

Again, don’t take any shit off of them. Stand up and defend yourself against bullying, no matter what!

5. Excuses schools make for Bullies:

“he’s a nice person once you get to know Him.”

This is just a polite way of saying, “He’s a real asshole but, after a while, you’ll get used to it.”

If nothing else, understand this right now! Bullying and abuse are not things you should ever get used to! Ever!

You do not have to put up with that garbage!

Anytime someone makes that kind of excuse for a bully, what they’re telling you is that they’ve been putting up with their crap. So, you should put up with it too.

Can I get a “hell no?”

You must realize that just because other people think they need to cower to some creep doesn’t mean you have to. If they want to let the bully dump all over them, it’s their life. Let them have at it!

But you don’t have to! Stand up to the bully and let them know that you aren’t the one!

6. “She’s just blowing off some steam.”

“Really? Then, maybe she should go somewhere else to blow it off!”

And that’s exactly what you should say. You are not a toxic waste dump! Therefore, don’t let some creep dump their toxic waste in your creek.

You are not responsible for their problems. And they shouldn’t be taking all their frustrations out on you! So, don’t let them do that.

7. Excuses schools make for bullies:

“He’s just having a bad day.”

“Everyone has those days now and then, but most of them don’t take it out on someone else.”

If your bully is having a bad day, that’s not your fault. And it’s not your problem. So, don’t let them try to make it your problem.

Buck up. Stand up. And let the bully know that you’re the wrong person to mess with. You must realize that bullies act this way because others have allowed them to get away with it for a long time.

Instead, they tiptoe around them to keep from setting them off. And because people have kissed the bully’s ass for so long, the bully has grown comfortable with being an asshole.

If nothing else, know this. You don’t have to put up with that! Other people may walk on eggshells around this person. But it doesn’t mean you have to.

So, tell the bully to buzz off. Also, tell them not to come around you until they calm their ass down.

In Conclusion

Schools and workplaces are full of bullies and other messed-up people. The world is full of them. And it’s a shame that most adults, at home and school, don’t teach kids to stand up for themselves like they used to.

If we don’t teach young people to take care of themselves now, they’ll only grow up to be spineless adults who submit to those who abuse power. And sadly, they won’t think to question it.

Schools can make all the policies they want. But until they enforce them, innocent students will continue to suffer bullying. And school officials will continue to make excuses for bullies and blame victims.

Therefore, know what to expect and be prepared. And stand up for yourself no matter how they may gaslight you. If that doesn’t work, it might be time for a school transfer.

This post was all about excuses schools make for bullies so that you’ll know what they are and be prepared to counter those excuses.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. School Choice: Why it’s a Godsend for Bullied Kids! 

2. Signs Someone is Gaslighting You: The 13 Must-Know Symptoms 

3. Putting Yourself First: 7 Powerful Self-Care Practices

Life Lessons from Bullying: 16 Powerful Takeaways to Remember

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 ‘Want to know all the life lessons from bullying? Here are all the morals of your bullying story that you need to know about.

life lessons from bullying

To endure bullying is the fight of your life. Though it’s painful, even excruciating, there are lessons you learn from it.

In this post, you will learn all the life lessons from bullying that you can take.

Once you learn all about these important lessons, you will feel much better about yourself. Moreover, you will look back one day and be glad you kept going when you wanted to give up.

This post is all about the life lessons from bullying to give you the strength to push forward instead of quitting.

Life Lessons from Bullying

I know it’s tough. But keep pushing on! Don’t quit! Don’t give up! I promise you that it will all be worth it in the end.

Here are all the takeaways from being a victim of bullying.

1. You learn that Sometimes you must live with what you hate before you can move on to what you love.

In other words, you must weather the storm before you can see sunlight. Why? It’s only when you’ve been through hell, you learn to appreciate heaven so much more.

Although your mind keeps telling you that there’s something wrong with you, know that there’s nothing wrong with you. It’s not your fault.

I know you want so badly to fix it, but you don’t know what’s broken.

You may think that you must be doing something to rub these people the wrong way. You aren’t. And if you listen to your heart, it will tell you differently.

Your heart will tell you that you did nothing wrong. Also, it will tell you that the bullies who bully you don’t like themselves and that they’re putting all that negative energy off on you.

This war between your mind and your heart leaves you exhausted. But, no matter how bad things get, don’t lose that small glimmer of hope in your eyes.

Although you carry an enormous amount of pain, you’re still holding on, taking it one day at a time. Keep it up.

Please love yourself. Continue to forge your path despite how others may treat you.

2. Life Lessons from Bullying:

You learn to Never hate those who bully you.

You can never repay hate with hate. Therefore, please don’t hate your bullies. Instead, feel sorry for them- take pity on them.

Hate only eats you up and rots out your very soul. It does nothing to your bullies. It only hurts you. There’s dignity in being hated.

Therefore, in your hate, you give your bullies dignity they don’t deserve. Feeling pity for them is so much better because there’s no dignity in pity.

3. You learn that Bullies fight demons of their own.

Their lives aren’t as perfect as they let on. Believe it or not, your bullies are hurting too. They have mental problems of their own that they never confessed to or got help for.

Only they’ll never in this lifetime tell you about it. Understand that they’re only keeping up appearances, which is such hard work.

Moreover, they’re angry at you because you don’t have to work as hard as they do.

If you’re being bullied at school, a lot of your bullies are indeed spoiled and coddled. However, many of them are abused at home. Some have parents who are into prostitution or drugs and alcohol, and who fight.

Also, many bullies are dirt poor, surviving on welfare and ashamed of it. Many of those you go to school with have home lives you couldn’t imagine! And school is their happy place.

Therefore, they’re only taking all their pain and frustrations out on you.

Looking back on my own experiences, I realize that my home life was better than most kids my age. I’m thankful for that. My home was a sanctuary compared to those of most of the other kids.

4. Life Lessons from Bullying:

You learn that You’re stronger than you realize.

You don’t yet realize how strong, brave, and resilient you are. But you are, just for the fact that you haven’t dropped out of school like so many of your classmates. You haven’t quit the race! You haven’t given up on life!

Even though others will bombard you with a barrage of attacks once you pass through the school entrance, you manage to find the courage to get up every morning and go to school. And you do it scared!

So, who are the weak ones now?

5. You learn that Most of your bullies will only end up miserable later on.

They may have favor with most of the teachers, even the ones who have little hope for you. However, most of them will never leave this town. This is a small town- only a dot on the map.

And, in a small town, it doesn’t take long to maximize one’s potential.

You may feel so small and insignificant. However, each of your classmates feels the same way.

The only way they can feel big and powerful is to make you feel bad. And one day, you’re going to see just how they end up.

Only a few will make it. The rest will be living in loveless and abusive marriages. Many will be poor and wondering how they’ll pay the rent. Some will join gangs or begin slinging dope.

Several will immerse themselves in drugs and alcohol to cope with their failures in life. Also, a good portion of them will end up behind bars. And many will have kids who disrespect and hurt them.

6. Life Lessons from Bullying:

You learn that Most of your bullies will never learn to love themselves.

Instead of letting love come from within, they’ll look outside of themselves for it.

Most of your classmates will be on a desperate and never-ending search for love. They’ll go through numerous divorces and broken relationships.

They’ll never learn to fall in love with themselves and with life first.

Instead, they’ll be on an endless quest for happiness. And they’ll never realize that happiness comes from within themselves.

7. You learn that Your bullies see you as a threat.

You must realize that you’re a major threat to your bullies. Do you know why? It’s because you’re smart.

You’re smart enough to see right through them, and they know it. They also hate it. Why? Because they’re afraid that you’re exposing the bullying and letting all their skeletons out of the closet.

Why do you think they shout you down and tell you to “shut up” every time you start to open your mouth? Why do you think they scream at you when you answer a teacher’s question in class?

And, why do you think they tell you to sit down every time you get out of your seat to sharpen a pencil or turn in homework?

It’s because they’re very much afraid that you’ll upstage them somehow. So, they keep you afraid to open your mouth or be noticed.

You’re also talented. And your classmates know it, and they’re jealous of it.

They hate it when you display your talents. Again, understand that they’re afraid that you just might outshine them.

You have so much potential. You just don’t know it yet. Why? Because your bullies have programmed you to think that you’re no good and will never amount to anything.

8. Life lessons from Bullying:

You learn that The Bullying you suffer is only temporary.

Life won’t always be this way. Bullies won’t always bully you. They won’t always be in your life.

Trust me. There will come a day when others will accept you. They will no longer just tolerate you but celebrate you.

You will have friends one day. Not fake ones, but real friends who’ll love you for all that you are and the beauty you bring to this world.

Also, you’ll have the courage to walk away from toxic people who are no good for you. And you won’t be afraid to stand alone until better people find you.

9. You learn to read people.

You learn to recognize threatening body language and facial expressions very quickly.

Being bullied will make you a very accurate people reader. If there’s anyone who will teach you the level of evil human beings are capable of, it’s bullies.

Once you’ve suffered the vicious onslaught of bullying for long, your people senses sharpen tremendously. This allows you to more accurately pick up on body language, facial expressions, tonality, and the hidden emotions/intentions of others around you.

Even better, you learn to read those split-second flashes or micro-expressions most others miss. Why? Because it becomes key to your survival!

This is only natural. An example would be a person who has lost their sight. We’ve heard stories of people who have suddenly gone blind. The same people reported that the other four senses automatically sharpened to compensate for the lost ability to see.

This is a natural survival mechanism of the body. It is the same when someone is bullied.

A victim of bullying is in a constant state of being threatened, both physically and psychologically. To survive, the person’s “sixth sense” and the ability to read non-verbal communication heightens to near perfection.

Again, this is only the brain’s and body’s way of protecting them. Understand that what compels a person to hone certain powers is always…ALWAYS necessity.

In other words, if our survival depends on how well we read the emotions, moods, and intentions of those around us, we will find a way to tap into that power. And we will learn it forward, backwards, upside down, and sideways!

10. Life Lessons from Bullying:

You learn that The bullying you suffer sharpens your BS detector.

The bullying you suffer now will turn you into a radar for bullshit. Bullying is never good, but it does have its payoffs for victims later.

You won’t see the benefits until after the bullying is over and you’ve healed. However, I can tell you that a bullied past has its positive takeaways.

And one of them is a fine-tuned ability to smell bullshit from a mile away. Being a target of bullies has ways of giving you an almost psychic ability to see through people.

Moreover, you can detect true motives and intentions. Having dealt with bullies allows you to observe a large group of people, then spot and pick out the fakes and troublemakers.

And you can do it at lightning speed and with accuracy. You don’t have to say a word. All you do is stand back and watch.

Think of it this way. A person who loses his sight experiences a much keener sense of hearing. Therefore, it’s the same concept with survivors and targets of bullying.

A victim of bullying quickly grows the ability to read people like a newspaper. Why? Out of sheer necessity. Many bullying survivors can read body language like an FBI agent, deciphering the tiniest of micro-expressions.

One can even pick up on the vibes others put out…especially negative ones. When a certain skill is mandatory for survival, nature gives you no choice but to quickly hone that skill.

This is a gift. However, it comes at a heavy price.

11. Life lessons from Bullying:

You learn that your safety is your responsibility.

If you’re a victim of bullying, can you truly rely on people in authority to help you? Can you rely on them to do something about the bullying you suffer?

Moreover, can you depend on them to hold your bullies accountable for their horrible behavior? Can you rely on others to bring you justice?

The answer is a resounding NO!

Life is but a vapor, and we only get one chance in this world. Therefore, it’s your responsibility to make that chance count.

If bullies make a derogatory statement to you. It’s your responsibility to counter that statement. So, start today by countering every negative statement your bullies may throw at you.

Tell yourself that you are awesome. Also, tell yourself that you’re a trooper and you deserve much better than the shit people have been giving you.

Only you have control over your life. Therefore, isn’t it time that you got pissed and took your life back?

Why not become a force to be reckoned with? Stand up to these confidence thieves! Let them know that they have no control over your life. Reclaim your power and do it NOW!

Only you have the responsibility to defend yourself from bullying. Your safety is on you!

12. Life Lessons from Bullying:

You learn that No one else is coming to rescue you.

No one is coming to save you from bullying. Not your teachers, your principal, your supervisors, or managers! Moreover, neither the police nor the government is coming to rescue you either.

Again, it’s your responsibility to stand up to your bullies.

It’s up to you to report your bullies. And if that doesn’t work, it’s up to you to defend yourself against them.

13. You learn that Governments can’t legislate bullying out of Bullies.

In other words, you cannot pass laws against it and think that it will go away. Passing laws against bullying will get a lot of innocent victims of it in trouble.

I used to be all about laws against bullying. And yes, the idea sounds great. I won’t pretend it doesn’t.

However, I’m beginning to gravitate away from making bullying a crime. Why? Because most people aren’t going to protect targets until it happens to them or one of theirs.

Here’s another reason I’m gravitating away from making bullying a crime. It’s because most seasoned bullies are believable liars.

They have a flair for flipping the script and painting their victims as the bad guys. Therefore, if lawmakers make bullying an imprisonable crime, many innocent targets would end up behind bars.

If you’re a victim of bullying, you must learn to take care of yourself.

14. Life Lessons from Bullying:

You learn that Anti-Bullying policies aren’t worth the paper they’re printed on.

You cannot rely too much on policies. Why? Because they have no teeth!

Schools and workplaces can write all the anti-bullying rules and policies they want. However, until they enforce those policies, they’re cheap. As cheap as the ink and paper that administrators use to make them!

What good are laws and policies if these entities don’t enforce them? And, at what point do we stop relying on the system to protect us and start protecting ourselves?

Understand that, no matter what anyone says, you don’t have to put up with anyone else’s crap. Therefore, it’s up to you to stand up to bullies and do it properly.

And if defending yourself doesn’t work, you have the option to remove yourself from the situation and environment.

15. You learn that bullies will keep bullying you unless you stand up for yourself.

Too many victims have been conditioned to think that self-defense is wrong. It isn’t!

And those who condition these victims to think this way are mostly bullies themselves. Therefore, if bullies select you for bullying, you must stand up for yourself. And you do it by setting boundaries!

Also, you must know your enemies. How you do this is to do a lot of study and research on bullies. Then, you can use the knowledge you gain to outmaneuver them.

16. Life Lessons from Bullying:

You learn to stop caring about what others say or think.

Opinions are just that – opinions! They’re the cheapest commodities on earth! Therefore, you shouldn’t give much value to them.

For someone to offend you, you must first value their opinion. And, to value someone’s opinion, you must also value them. So, stop giving undue value to ignorant people. They damn sure haven’t earned it!

The value you give to an opinion depends on the person giving it and your relationship to them. Put simply, the value of your loving mother’s opinion holds much more value than that of some jerk at work!

In Conclusion

Bullying is painful as hell. No doubt about it. However, if you look for the lessons it can teach you, you will come out on the other side, a winner!

This post was all about the life lessons from bullying so that you can more easily overcome it.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. 5 Things to Never Do with a Bully

2. Setting Boundaries: 3 Powerful Practices to Hold Your Ground

3. Opinions are Not Facts: 7 Reasons Those of Bullies Don’t Matter

bullies who brag about bullying you

Bullies Who Brag about Bullying: How They Screw Themselves

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 ‘Want to know all about bullies who brag about bullying their victims? Here are all the behaviors you need to know about.

bullies who brag about bullying

Bullies have big mouths. When they succeed in taking their targets down, you can bet that they will boast about it later.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about bullies who brag about bullying and why they do it.

Once you learn all about these important details, you will be able to catch it the next time your bullies brag and use it to bust them.

This post is all about bullies who brag about bullying so that you can use their own words to expose them.

Bullies who Brag about Bullying

I say this because many of my bullies were chronic boasters and braggarts. Anytime a bully beat me up physically or verbally, they would immediately boast about it to get the “street cred” and make that power-high last a little longer.

In fact, most bullies who score a win at your expense will do this. They will posture. And they do it to get attention and props from others.

They will make haughty statements, such as,

  • “I let her have it!”
  • “I cursed her out!”
  • “I threw his little ass down the stairs!”  
  • “I body-slammed that b*tch!”
  • “I kicked her butt!”
  • “I made his nose bleed!”
  • “I choked her out!”
  • “I threw him on the floor and kicked her in the ribs! I wish I’d broke her ribs!”
  • “I told her off!”
  • “I beat the breaks off that *****!”
  • “That little punk got owned!”
  • “We sure put that wimp in her place!”
  • “When we see him, we’re going to cut him down to size!”
  • “We sure shut her down when she tried to open her mouth, didn’t we?”

And they’ll do it while laughing and giving each other high fives. Oh, yes! If your bullies do the same to you, they will be so proud of themselves. They will want the whole world to know how they put “a girl like that” in her place.

Moreover, those who are listening will likely laugh derisively and openly. And sometimes they will brag and laugh right in front of you and even a few teachers.

‘You see? Bullies get their egos involved any time they bully you. And they will be determined that they’re going to prove you wrong, by George!

Bullies who brag about bullying have huge egos.

They’re going to humiliate you. They are going to show you who’s boss. And they’re going to show you that you aren’t as good, safe, independent, strong, or brave as you may think you are.

They’re going to get you! And they’re going to get you good and make you feel it when they do! Bullies love to talk smack! And they do it for psychological abuse.

Yet, if anyone outside their group brings it up and, especially if you do, they will sneer, ridicule, and do their due diligence to silence you? They even deny that it’s happening, or they try and justify themselves.

Here’s why your bullies brag on themselves.

1. To remind others that they have all the power.

Anytime your bullies take you down, they grow full of themselves. They get drunk on their own power. Realize that bullies are megalomaniacs. In other words, they can’t get enough power.

Also, they want others to think they’re more important than they truly are. Therefore, they’ll gloat any time they score a win, no matter how small that victory may be.

2. To remind each and everyone else that the same can happen to them.

Bullies like to brag because they know it intimidates others besides you. In other words, they use you as an example.

Therefore, when bystanders see your bullies torture and torment you, they get the message loud and clear that it’s best not to piss them off. So, they do their best just to stay out of their way.

And if they have to bully you themselves to stay off their radar, don’t think they won’t do it.

3. Bullies who Brag About Bullying:

They do it to encourage others to look down on you.

If your bullies can get others to join them in ridiculing you, they get a huge ego boost. Also, they get the satisfaction of making you feel worse. It’s a fact that large groups can do more damage than individuals.

To keep you down.

Your bullies already brought you down when they physically attacked you. Now, they mean to keep you down by bragging about it. 

If nothing else, know this! You bullies hate your living guts. Therefore, they can’t hurt you enough. In other words, no amount of pain you suffer will be enough to satisfy them.

They’ll always want more. But here’s another thing you probably don’t think about. In doing this, they openly admit that you’re their target and that they abuse you.

Bragging will catch up with your bullies.

Yep! You read that correctly. In their incessant boasting, your bullies are outing themselves. They’re admitting that they’re the ones who are bullying you. Moreover, they’re doing it without even realizing it.

They’re too ignorant to realize that their bragging is a confession. They’re confessing who the real victim is and who the bullies are.

By letting everyone know that they have all the power, and that you’re powerless, they only admit their bullying behavior.

And once you realize these little nuggets of truth when they do this, you won’t feel so powerless. In fact, you’ll be able to use it to your advantage.

In other words, you’ll get to weaponize every word that comes out of their big mouths and use them against your bullies. You’ll use their brags as evidence that they really are the perpetrators and possibly scare them into leaving you alone.

However, most victims of bullying don’t think about this. Why? Because the bullying stresses them out so much that they lose the ability to think clearly. Also, if they suffer bullying in school, few kids think about this at age 12, 13, or even 17? 

Bullies who Brag about Bullying:

Weaponizing their brags worked for me!

Speaking from my own experience, I only thought of this years later, after a bullying incident at work. A vicious coworker accosted me in the hallway. And, as you can probably guess, she bragged about it later.

I immediate jumped on it, using it to my benefit and calling it out.  And I was amazed at the results! The bullying coworker ended up with a week’s suspension and the bullying came to a screeching halt.

From that day forward, she avoided me and never even looked in my general direction.

Therefore, I want you to know that, if you’re a target of bullying and your bullies openly brag about taking you down, that right there, is a confession!

It is important that you point that out. You can say something to the tune of: “Oh, so, you admit to bullying me? Nice! Now, I don’t have to convince anyone. You did that for me! So, thank you!”

And, when you say it, be a real smart-ass. 

If a teacher or supervisor is present. You can turn to them and say, “Uh-huh! See there? Straight from the horse’s mouth. They just admitted that they attacked me. Now, who’s the instigator?”

Do this and you will be pleasantly amazed (and tickled pink) when you see your bullies’ faces change. Their expressions will go from smug looks of arrogance to looks of horror and humiliation, knowing they really stepped in it by opening their traps.

Then you can smile devilishly as they try desperately to pull the foot out of their mouths! Remember that loose lips sink ships and boasting can backfire. Royally!

Always point out the bullies’ confession. Use your bullies’ boasting to trap them. You’ll be surprised at just how fast you shut them down. 

In Closing

As mentioned, bullies, their followers, and cohorts like to brag and boast to others and among themselves about how they abuse you. That much is true.

They gloat to anyone who will listen to them, and people seem to get personal entertainment from it. And, no, they’re not afraid to do it right in front of you.

But call them on it and you throw your bullies into panic mode. They’ll turn right around and deny it then blame you. However, once they’ve opened their mouths in front of someone in power who knows how they are, the gaslighting almost never works.

Have you even wondered why they do this- openly brag about the abuse they inflict on you, then turn around and, depending on the person bringing it up or the overall circumstances and environment, try to cover up the abuse?

It’s because this is the best way for the bullies to hide the abuse in plain sight and sadly, it works like a charm and it’s hard to combat. But don’t lose hope.

Why? Because your bullies will eventually tell off on themselves.

Know that these types of people always get a little too cocky and then get clumsy. They’ve been getting away with stuff for so long that they push a little further, a little further.

They keep pushing until they finally push over the line and end up hanging themselves. And the best part is that you get to see it!

Again, use their brags and call them out. It’s the best way to bust them!

This post is all about bullies who brag about bullying so that you can weaponize their bragging and bust them with it.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Psychological Abuse Tactics: 9 Mind Games Seasoned Bullies Use 

2. Bullies in School: 5 Ways They Tell Off on Themselves Without Realizing It

Bullies and Victim-Mentality: 9 Behaviors of Bullies Who Play Victim

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‘Want to know about bullies and victim-mentality? Here’s everything you need to know.

bullies and victim-mentality

Bullies don’t mind dishing the nastiness out to their victims. However, when the victims start giving it back to them, they’ll play the victim-role real quickly.

In fact, they’re the biggest cry-babies in the world!

Therefore, in this post you will learn all about bullies and victim-mentality so that you can keep from being blamed for their attacks.

Once you learn all about these important facts, you will be able to confidently call them out when you defend yourself against your bullies and they try to act like they’re the victims.

This post is all about bullies and victim-mentality so that you can recognize the behavior and call it out. Also, you can protect yourself from getting blamed for your bullies’ ratchet behavior.

Bullies and Victim-Mentality

Bullies have a grandiose sense of entitlement. Why? Because they’re so quick to attack you without provocation. However, you finally get fed up and show your ugly side, it not only surprises them, it also offends them.

Therefore, they’ll assume the victim role.

Here are 9 behaviors of bullies who play victim.

1. They Dissolve into a puddle of tears.

If a bully thinks they’re about to get into trouble over their bad behavior, they’ll quickly turn on the water works. They’ll cry those crocodile tears and play the victim.

Unfortunately, they’ll do it so convincingly that others will fall for their bullshit. Therefore, be prepared and don’t take the blame for their bad behavior.

Call out those fake tears. And do it loudly and with confidence. Why? Because they’re nothing but a bunch of cry-bullies.

2. They Get Outraged at you for standing up to them.

Understand that bullies feel entitled to do whatever they want to do and you have no right to stop them. In fact, they believe you don’t have a right to even speak against it.

They think that they are beyond reproach and that you should never question their behavior.

You’re bullies think they have a right to mistreat you and you’re just supposed to bow down and take their crap. You’re just supposed to let them harm you and take it with a smile.

Why? Because, in their minds, you’re inferior. So, you should just shut your mouth and take it. They may not come out and say it. However, this is how these chumps think.

3. Bullies and victim-mentality:

They’ll gripe, whine, and complain when things don’t go their way.

For instance, if you hold them accountable for anything, your bullies will bitch, moan, and regress into a toddler. If you stand up to them, they may run to a teacher or boss-man and cry like a little bitch.

They might throw a temper tantrum, railing against the injustice and unfairness of it all.

Also, they may also do something to get back at you for daring to stand up for yourself. Understand that cry-bullies must always get their way. This is why they get furious with and throw a fit with you.

Then, they’ll tell anyone who’ll listen that you’re the bully.

4. They’ll shout you down when call them out on their bad behavior.

To them, their words and opinions are golden. Therefore, if you happen to speak against them, your bullies will instantly turn into petulant children.

They’ll call you all kinds of ugly names and launch personal attacks against you. Moreover, they may even hit you first.

But, if you hit them back, they will cry like a wimp and claim you started it.

5. Bullies and Victim-Mentality:

They want everything handed to them.

Cry-bullies are entitled to have whatever they want when they want it. They don’t like to work for anything. Moreover, they don’t like to wait for it either.

These types of people are impatient. When they want something, they want it right then. And they’ll never stop bothering you until you cave in and give it to them.

You must understand that your bullies do this to wear you down. However, don’t give them the satisfaction. Double down and resist, no matter what! Stand firm, if for nothing more than to teach them a lesson.

6. They hate it when someone else has life better than they do.

When your bullies see you doing better than them, it makes them feel indignant. In other words, they feel that life hasn’t given them a fair shake.

They will often sulk and play on others’ sympathy. Also, they will try to get back at you for being just a little luckier than they are.

Understand that these types of individuals see your successes as injustice.

7. They Shift the blame to you.

This point takes me back to how the bully tries to make you look like the bully. In some cases, this person deludes herself into believing that she is, in fact, the victim.

And sadly, they’re very successful in making others believe that garbage.

Therefore, when you think of a cry-bully, think Nellie Olson in the TV series, “Little House on the Prairie.”

Don’t pander to the crybully and don’t be too nice and try to calm them down. If you do, they’ll only keep manipulating you.

8. Bullies and Victim-Mentality:

Many Bullies Cop Out Behind Victimization.

Too many people use past trauma as justification for wrongdoing. They feel that because they suffered, life owes them somehow.

I have seen people mistreat others merely because of the bullying they suffered in the past. But, why do they do this? It’s because they think that it’s the only way they can feel empowered again.

Sadly, I was guilty of the same thing in high school. It isn’t something I’m proud of today.

For example, some may choose to rob a bank or burn down a corporate building because they grew up poor. Because they didn’t get a fair shake in life, they think that it justifies their crimes.

In their minds, the world owes them. Therefore, they have a good excuse for striking back against a system they believe screwed them over.

And, when the law finally catches them and hauls them off to jail, they become even more embittered. Why? Because they believe that being held responsible for their crimes only further evidences that they aren’t getting a fair shake.

We’re all responsible for our actions regardless of what happened to us in the past. 

Evil behavior always brings consequences. You reap what you sow.

Your feelings are valid but your actions aren’t. Past victimization does not justify wrongdoing. Ever! A reason does not equal an excuse. We’re all responsible for our lives, whether you like it or not.

I could have gone on bullying others because people bullied me in the past. But where would it have gotten me? Nowhere! That behavior would have only brought consequences and more misery.

Wouldn’t it be better to learn from adversity and take accountability for your life? Therefore, it’s up to you to try to make your life better than it was in the past.

9. Bullies and Victim-Mentality:

They live in the past.

Now, reminiscing isn’t a bad thing. To look back on yesterday, when life was much simpler, makes you feel good. Happy memories always make you feel better.

However, when you constantly ruminate on the bad stuff that happened to you, that’s when it becomes a problem.

You hold grudges. And you long to someday get back at the person who hurt you. This isn’t good for anyone. It only eats you out from the inside.

Bullies are notorious for holding grudges.

Sadly, too many survivors of bullying hold on to grudges. They constantly ruminate over the bullying they endured, wishing they had knocked the hell out of the bully. They look back with remorse, shame, guilt, and regret.

Now, it’s normal to do right after you’ve gotten out of the toxic environment that encouraged the bullying. I completely understand. However, when this goes on for too many years, you only hold yourself back. Unnecessary baggage only keeps you down.

Therefore, don’t trap yourself in an endless cycle of what-ifs. Why? Because, when you do, you only keep yourself stuck in a quagmire of misery.

Also, you forgo opportunities to learn from and grow from those experiences.

So, let it go. Accept what happened and learn from it. Let it make you better instead of bitter!Only then can you reach empowerment and find happiness.

In Closing

Nothing makes you sicker than seeing some punk bully start something they can’t finish. And there’s nothing more pathetic than a bully who pushes someone too far, than cries like a schoolyard sissy when they get their ass kicked up between their shoulders.

But sadly, this is how most of them get away with bullying.

Therefore, if you’re a bully, do yourself a favor. Don’t mess with someone and expect not to get some in return. Don’t be a cry-bully.

And, if you’re a victim, stand up for yourself even if your bully tries to put on the innocent little victim act. Continue to hold your boundaries.

Don’t fall for the crocodile tears or the selective outrage. Call that shit out! And stand strong. Realize that victim-mentality is only a farce, designed to keep your bullies’ asses out of trouble.

And lastly, and most importantly, refuse to see yourself as a victim. Instead, see yourself as a target. Why? Because there’s a difference between a target of bullying and a victim of bullying.

This post is all about bullies and victim-mentality so that you can recognize it when you see it and be prepared for it when you stand up to your bullies.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. What is a Crybully and How Do You Spot One?

2. Setting Boundaries: 3 Powerful Practices to Hold Your Ground

3. Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying? 15 Must-Know Answers

4. Target vs Victim: 5 Reasons Your Choice of Words Matters