Tag: arrogance

How Confidence and Egotism Differ

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The confusion between the two is quite common. However, there are ways to distinguish between confidence and egotism. Before I go further, let me start by saying that we all have egos. However, the trick is in how we handle them.

1. Confidence is quiet. Egotism is loud and boastful.

2. The former doesn’t have to boast because it already knows its value. The latter, on the other hand, must constantly remind others of its value.

3. Confidence is teachable. Whereas, egotism is not. It kills the capacity to learn because it thinks it already knows everything there is to know.

4. Confidence leads to growth. Egotism can only lead to stagnation and eventual destruction.

Two Opposites

Princess Diana, during her latter years, was the perfect example of confidence. Once she saw her worth, she traveled the world, helping the less fortunate.

Hitler, on the other hand, was an example of egotism. His overinflated ego led to the destruction and loss of millions of innocent lives. Also, it produced intense hatred for an entire people.

As we know, bullies aren’t confident, they’re egotistical. Again, we all have egos. However, not all of us have egotism. Egotism is bad because it often stems from negative feelings of anger, guilt, jealousy, insecurity, and fear. And it’s the reason bullies often target those based on the lower role they play and their stations in life.

Confidence Promotes Equality while Egotism Promotes Division

Confident people treat the janitor or the security guard with the same respect they would give the company president or the CEO. In contrast, egotistical bullies only will only mistreat the janitor and security guard while sucking up to the president and the CEO.

A confident person gives kindness and respect to those who can do nothing for him. He treats everyone equally regardless of difference or position. Ego-driven bullies only abuse those he knows can’t benefit him somehow.

Those who are confident have selfless motives and doesn’t care who you are as long as you’re a decent and moral person. However, those who are ego-driven bullies are self-serving. With these types of personalities, it’s all about fame and name.

Putting ego aside means respecting those who society deems beneath you and giving them the same human value. It means making an effort to understand those who are different from you and doing your best to help them somehow.

Egotism is when ego overrides humanity and places it in grave danger. Confidence, on the other hand, helps and saves humanity.

Confidence Saves Humanity, Egotism Destroys it.

Sadly, I’ve worked with people who were great people to get along with. But once they got that coveted promotion, they became people I no longer recognized.

Bullies often spend money beyond their means to buy expensive clothes and cars, trying to look like they’re better off than everyone else. This is a sure hallmark of egotism. Unfortunately, they get deep in debt and sometimes resort to thievery to get out of it. As a result, they end up in legal trouble, which is an example of the self-destruction that egotism can bring.

Therefore, be aware of these signs in other people. And be confident, but know where the line between confidence and egotism lies.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

The Difference between Confidence and Arrogance

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Many people get the two confused. Why? Because they’ve been conditioned to believe that even the smallest shred of confidence is arrogance and that it’s bad.

Sadly, many people are taught by bullies, abusers, or well-meaning people who, themselves were also taught such things and didn’t know better; that confidence, self-respect, self-love, and self-compassion are arrogance and they’re bad people for having those treasures. They are also manipulated into believing that they don’t deserve them.

If you were taught this, understand that you were fed lies. Confidence, basic self-respect, self-love, and self-compassion are not arrogant, and they aren’t selfish. What they are is essential– essential for good mental health and a good life. They’re crucial for happiness and fulfillment.

 

Realize that when someone attacks your confidence by accusing you of being arrogant or self-centered, it’s not about you. It’s really about them and always has been. Because they only do it to keep you down by making you feel less than them.

They do it because, deep down, they feel small. So, they feel they must push you down into the pits of low self-esteem so they can feel superior. These people, who are bullies, believe they must break your spirit to uplift theirs.

Oh, but wait! Here’s something else to think about here: maybe bullies and abusers drum this garbage into your head because they’re afraid. That’s right!

They’re frightened that if you manage to attain or to keep that precious confidence that you were born with, then you just might grow a pair of coconuts! You’re more likely to develop the spinal column to tell them where they can stick it and drop them like a bad habit!

Realize that this is about power. Moreover, it’s about making sure they keep you in your place, so they don’t risk losing their power over you.

So, what is the difference between confidence and arrogance? Here are your answers:

1. Confidence is healthy. It’s never shy nor boastful. It’s that happy and healthy middle between low self-esteem and smugness. When a person is confident, they don’t have to trumpet their own importance and they don’t have to show off. Confidence isn’t loud or obnoxious, it’s quiet. A confident person doesn’t boast or brag because they don’t have to. They know their value and all the good they bring to this world. They already know their own importance. Confidence is seen and not heard because it’s there.

Confident people believe they’re equal to everyone else. They believe they’re no better than anyone but just as good. They are kind to others and allow them to be themselves and do their own thing. However, a confident person is assertive. They aren’t afraid to set firm boundaries and lay down the law if another person sticks so much as a toe over their boundaries.

2. Arrogance is unhealthy- in fact, it’s toxic! Arrogance is extreme. It’s loud and obnoxious. When a person is arrogant, they’re full of themselves. An arrogant person makes sure that everyone around them knows how important they are because they announce it to the world.

Arrogance is like a peacock; it shows all it’s pretty colors and expects people to notice and give it recognition. Arrogance is boastful because it is insecure, and it craves attention, admiration, and adoration.

An arrogant person believes he’s superior. They treat people they deem inferior like dirt and will go out of their way to bully them and let them know who the king of the mountain is.

An arrogant person either doesn’t recognize boundaries, or he resents them. He believes that he should have carte blanche to violate another person’s boundaries and gets highly pissed if the person he bullies has the gall to stand up to him.

An arrogant person is a self-entitled, egotistical, self-satisfied turd who uses flamboyance to compensate for insecurity, cowardice, and weakness.

A confident person, on the other hand, doesn’t let his confidence effect the way he treats people because he believes that everyone has a right to respect and dignity.

I want you to know that it’s okay to be confident and to be comfortable in your own skin. It’s okay to have respect for yourself and to love yourself. And it’s okay to indulge in self-care and to tell some creep to go to hell if they get abusive with you. So, be confident! Know that you can have confidence without being a pompous stuffed shirt. Know your worth and that you deserve to be treated well and with love and respect.

With knowledge comes empowerment!