‘Want to know all about standing up to bullies and what happens when you do? Here’s how bullies react when you stand up to them and why you should feel good about it.
In movies and television, we see scenarios where targets stand up to bullies and automatically either get left alone or become friends with their former tormentors. However, in most cases, this is not reality. Remember that bullies are relentless.
However, you should feel good about it because, when they act out, your bullies are only revealing themselves.
Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about standing up to bullies and how they react when you finally do. Moreover, you will learn why you should welcome their reactions and how those reactions expose bullies for who they are.
Once you learn all about this life-changing information, you will be able to speak out confidently and handle it properly when your bullies react.
This post is all about standing up to bullies and everything that comes with it.
Standing up to Bullies
You may be afraid to stand up to your bullies and I understand completely. Anytime you stand up to bullies, you’re taking a risk. However, it’s often worth the risk and you end up thanking yourself later.
Just the same, you need to know what to expect once you’ve had enough and decide to take a stand.
If people bully you left and right, you must realize that bullies will not relinquish their power so easily. In other words, they will not be good sports and hand your human rights back to you.
Neither will they bow out of your life gracefully. Bullies have an insatiable need to wield power over you. Why? Because, without that power, they feel lost.
Realize that bullies have no redeemable qualities and they’re losers in life. And since they can’t get power by their own merit, the only way left to get it is by ruining someone else’s life.
Here are the tactics bullies use when you stand up for yourself:
Make no mistake about it. When you kick unsavory people out of your life, they will do the following:
1. They will gaslight you
Bullies will add their spin to it. In other words, bullies will try to convince you that you are at fault or that the abuse is your imagination. Bullies are masters at this, especially female bullies who use feminine charm to deceive bystanders and authority figures.
They might accuse you of being too sensitive. Moreover, bullies may tell you, “I didn’t say it,” or “I didn’t do that.”
Understand that all this is designed to make you question yourself and feel like the villain. Therefore, learn how to recognize gaslighting when you hear it and protect your mind.
2. Standing up to Bullies:
They will lay guilt trips
In other words, your bullies might bring up a past favor they did for you. They may say, “after all I’ve done for you, this is how you thank me?”
Your bullies may not have done anything for you. Moreover, if they did, they only did it for obligation points they can use later.
3. They may recruit followers and start a smear campaign
Bullies are experts at this. By recruiting followers to spread rumors and lies, your bullies use numbers to discredit you. Why? Because the more people they get to say bad things about you, the more likely stranger are to believe them.
They will also try to turn your friends against you. I say this from first-hand experience. Bullies did the same to me many times.
Moreover, it always came as retaliation for my having the gall to stand up to them and assert my rights to defend myself.
Therefore, expect your bullies to malign you to others. And know that they’re only retaliating by trying to destroy your good name and credibility.
4. They will turn your friends against you
Females, although becoming more and more physically violent with time, commit much of their bullying by Dividing and Conquering. In other words, they attack your relationships. And they do this to isolate you by turning everyone against you.
There’s another objective to this as well. Once bullies turn all your friends against you, then, they can gather intimidate details about your life and weaponize them.
Think about it. Your friends likely know your deepest, darkest secrets. They would be the ones to know the most intimate details about your life. Friends are a GOLDMINE of information to bullies.
5. Standing Up to Bullies:
They will project their shortcomings onto you
Bullies have flaws and their greatest fear is having them exposed. What better way to keep their imperfections hidden than to project them onto you?
In other words, your bullies accuse you of the same rotten things they themselves are doing.
6. They will distract others’ attention away from their flaws by pointing out yours
What better way is there to hide their own shortcomings than putting the spotlight on yours? It shouldn’t be so easy but it is!
“Don’t look over here. Look over there!” or “Don’t look at me. Look at them!”
7. They will use Physical Violence.
If none of the previous six tactics work. They will use physical violence. However, they only use this as a last resort because bodily harm is the most detectable form of bullying.
Let’s break it down some more here.
If bullies can’t control you, they will control how others see you.
In other words, if your bullies can no longer have power over you, they will start smear campaigns and try to turn others against you. Understand that they do this to isolate you from everyone.
Bullies use these strategies to cover their backsides. Moreover, they do it to punish you for daring to grow a spine and defend yourself. And thirdly, they do it to close you off from any possible help or protection.
Once the bullies isolate you, they then move in for the kill. Now, they can do whatever they want to you. Moreover, they can do it freely and with impunity.
Why? Because if everyone is against you, the least likely they are to report the bullies or stop them from abusing you.
Remember, your bullies have succeeded in turning people against you. Now, no one can stand you. Therefore, in the minds of others, you deserve the abuse. You’ve got it coming and you’ve had it coming!
Therefore, hell will freeze over before anyone lifts a finger to help you. And this is exactly the outcome your bullies have been counting on.
Figuratively, Your bullies want to hold you hostage.
And they will resort to any means necessary to keep you on emotional lock down. This is how they keep you in your place.
Standing Up to Bullies:
Physical violence is usually a last ditch effort at power and control.
Sometimes, exclusion, subtle digs, verbal assaults, gaslighting and smear campaigns fail to do the job. Or, they may lose their effectiveness and no longer have the impact your bullies intended for them to have.
Therefore, your bullies will then resort to physical violence. The physical violence will go one of two ways:
- Bullies will commit the bodily harm themselves.
- They will send someone else to do their savagery for them.
This does not mean that you should not stand up for yourself because you should. However, when you do, be prepared. The torment will get worse before it gets better.
So, be strong. Be brave and know that none of it is your fault.
The Power Dynamic Shifts In Your Favor the Moment You Stand Up to Your Bullies
Anytime you stand up to a bully, you instantly change the power dynamic. In other words, you immediately take your personal power back. At the same time, you automatically put the bully in a position of weakness and inferiority.
In simplest terms, you flip the script and take the position of power over the bully. This is why bullies cannot handle it when you stand up to them. Because they feel that they must always be in the position of power.
Standing up to Bullies:
Bullies can’t handle being stood up to by those they deem beneath them.
Bullies get angry enough when anyone stands up to them. However, if that person happens to be someone they deem inferior and who they’ve grown accustomed to abusing, this is when they really lose their marbles!
This is because you’re most likely on the bottom of the pecking order. And when you finally buck up and grow a backbone, you figuratively trade places with the bullies.
Therefore, you automatically put them on the bottom of the pecking order, if only for that moment. This is what the bullies can’t handle and it’s why they explode with rage.
Their unspoken message is:
- “How dare you!”
- “Who are you to stand up to me!”
- “You’re supposed to be under me and here you are talking and acting like you’re OVER me!”
- “The nerve!”
- Who do you think you are!”
Bullies rely on force to get what they want from you.
In other words, they depend on fear, overwhelming strength, and coercion. Bullies have been steamrolling people and getting what they want from them for a long time. In fact, they’ve been doing it for so long that they’ve become arrogant and self-satisfied.
Therefore, when you’ve finally had enough of their gas and put your foot down, you can bet that it’s going to throw them off. And do you know what else it’s going to do?
It’s going to blast a huge hole in their ego. Moreover, it’ll shock the bejeebers out of them. Then the bullies will become highly PO’ed. In fact, they’ll become so angry that they’ll more than likely go from zero to one hundred in a matter of seconds.
If the bully is a person with narcissism (and most bullies are), they will go into narc*ssistic rage. And trust me, you don’t want to be anywhere around when this happens.
Standing up to Bullies:
Stand your ground but be prepared for anything.
It’s best to be prepared. Expect the unexpected.
When you finally grow a spine, expect your bullies to do anything to break it. Therefore, they escalate the bullying when you stop taking their crap.
Bullies have very delicate egos. Moreover, bullying always involves ego. So, any time you tell them to go kick rocks, you undermine their perceived superiority. Even worse, you put them into an inferior position and they know it.
In other words, bullies are very prideful and their pride takes a huge blow anytime you talk back or fight back. And most bullies would rather die than to be made inferior, especially to a little peon like you.
Therefore, be prepared for a battle because your bullies will become vindictive. They’ll seek revenge and they won’t stop coming after you until they get it.
It doesn’t matter if your bullies were the ones who started it because, to them, it doesn’t matter who’s right or wrong.
In other words, don’t care if they’re the ones who’ve mistreated you all these years. Furthermore, they don’t care that you only want to be left alone.
The only thing they are thinking at this moment is that you challenged them. You are a target and nothing more. In other words, you are beneath them. And you had the gall to undermine their (perceived) authority and superiority.
The nerve! The audacity! The chutzpah!
Keep Standing Up for yourself, no matter what!
In other words, if your bullies keep coming for you, you mustn’t back down. Unless they have a deadly weapon, keep fighting and fighting hard.
Know that you deserve to be safe and to live in peace. And when bullies try to disrupt your peace, you have every right to stand up to them and defend yourself. Because if you don’t take care of yourself, no one else will.
Don’t wait for someone to come rescue you because, chances are, it won’t happen. It’s up to you to take a stand. Your life is your responsibility. That means that standing up to bullies is your responsibility.
You can do it! I believe in you!
This post is all about standing up to bullies, what to expect when you stand up to them, and why you should continue to stand firm no matter what.
1. How to Defend Yourself from Bullies: 5 Powerful Strategies
2. Defending Yourself from Bullies: 11 Best Defenses
3. Your First Line of Defense Against Bullying
4. Setting Boundaries: 3 Powerful Practices to Hold Your Ground
