‘Want to know how to recognize a victim of bullying? Here are all the signs you need to know about.
If you look closely, you will recognize a victim of bullying. You will be able to tell it in their body language and the way they carry themselves.
Therefore, in this post, you will learn how to recognize a victim of bullying by reading their body language.
Once you learn all about this important information, you will be able to help a person who is bullied. Moreover, you will be able to watch your own body language if you’re a victim yourself.
This post is all about how to recognize a victim of bullying so that you can not only monitor your own non-verbal communication, but reach out to other victims by recognizing theirs.
How to Recognize a Victim of Bullying
There are certain things you see in a victim that screams just that… “victim!” If bullies can point out victim material a mile away, then why can’t people who aren’t bullies?
When You Look into The Face of a Victim of Bullying
If you pay close attention, you see the anguish. Also, you can see the desperately yearning to belong. They’ll have hopelessness and despair in their eyes. The victim will constantly wonder if things will ever get better.
You also see fear in their eyes. Moreover, it will come from knowing they could be physically or psychologically attacked at any moment. Maybe even killed!
Other times, you’ll see the sadness. The victim will want to cry. However, they won’t dare to. They’ll be too afraid of looking weaker than they already look to others.
You won’t hear the silent pleas for help. Why? Because most people won’t help victims. Therefore, they know that usually, help never comes.
Most victims have a lack of trust in humanity. How can you trust after people have let you down too many times?
Moreover, you’ll see the exhaustion. The constant battle can wear you out. Victims yearn for peace. They desperately want the war to stop.
They’ve forgotten what it’s like to relax, breathe, and not have to fight. But more than anything else, you see the determination to survive another day.
How to Recognize a Victim of Bullying:
Know the Body Language of Targets
Bullies bully many of their victims long term. Many do it over a period of years. Imagine what that does to the victims’ self-esteem.
Low self-esteem, sadly, comes out in a person’s body language.
Therefore, victims of bullying are nervous people. Is it any wonder they constantly walk on eggshells?
This goes especially in social situations. It’s why victims of bullying tend to monitor every action and every word that comes out of their mouths?
And why not? Bullies have beaten them down. In fact, they’ve stripped them of their entire person-hood.
You’re always on guard. And that’s a crappy way to live.
Are they nervous and afraid or are they lying?
It depends on context.
Consequently, people accuse victims of bullying of lying about the bullying they suffer. Why? Because people mistake nervousness for having something to hide.
If you ever read “Othello,” by William Shakespeare, you’ll get a clearer picture of this heartbreaking scenario.
Moreover, this is why people call this, “Othello’s Error.”
How to Recognize a Victim of Bullying:
Othello’s Error
Othello’s Error often happens in police interrogation rooms and principal’s offices.
It comes from Shakespeare’s play, “Othello.” In the play, the main character, Othello, assumes that his wife, Desdemona, is having an affair.
In reality, Desdemona is innocent
He questions her in a aggressive and volatile manner. As a result, the poor wife becomes nervous. Even worse, the angry husband takes her nervousness as a sign of guilt.
Sadly, his often occurs in real life.
For example, bullying victims become nervous when someone questions them aggressively. The questioner then misreads the response.
They take it as a sign that the person is hiding something. Sadly, this is how many people take blame for something they didn’t do.
Most people view nervousness as a sign of deception and confidence as a sign of honesty and trustworthiness.
As we know, bullies are well-known for fake confidence and false bravado. However, victims of bullying are always nervous, and rightfully so.
Who wouldn’t be if they were constantly bullied and attacked?
People tend to rush to the narrative the fits what want to be true. Therefore, should it be any wonder that people blame targets and let bullies go scot-free?
Sadly, after this goes on for so long, targets learn to expect more of the same. And they usually get it.
In other words, the expectation of such treatment brings more of the same. So, the target grows more nervous with each occurrence.
And the more nervous the victim grows, the more suspicious others become of them. Therefore, people often make mistakes in the decoding. Not the observation!
How to Recognize a Victim of Bullying:
13 signs a person is a victim of bullying
1. Lack of Eye Contact.
Because of severe bullying and abuse, many victims are too afraid to even look people in the eye. This goes specially for those on the Autism Spectrum!
Moreover, when people bully you to the point that you fear looking at them, it’s a terrible thing. Lack of eye contact can signal deception, yes.
However, it’s usually not the case with victims of bullying. When a person is suffering from bullying or any type of abuse, it usually conveys terror.
Therefore, we must look at context. We must ask ourselves these questions. “Have I witnessed others consistently bullying this person?”
“Are there other non-verbal signals from this person besides the inability to look at people?” This is where the ability to read clusters of body language comes in handy.
If the person is shaking, sweating, licking their lips and touching their neck, you might be able to make a more accurate guess.
Again, targets of bullying are anxious. Who wouldn’t be if they were relentlessly bullied?
Therefore, before you make snap judgements, assess the person carefully. Don’t automatically assume that the victim is lying.
2. Submissive Body Language
Many targets of bullying also display submissive body language. No surprise there. They have endured bullying so severe that they’ve learned to be submissive just to survive.
The submissive person has lost all sense of their worth. Moreover, they’re afraid to make their own decisions.
Why? Because they fear they might make the wrong one and be bullied worse for it.
3. How to Recognize a Victim of Bullying:
The Person is Overly Forgiving
Bully victims tend to be overly forgiving. Why? Because they want to rock the boat.
Rather than risk the chance of conflict, victims of bullying take the path of least resistance. It’s easier and less risky for them to go along with the abuse.
Think about it. They already get enough of it from their bullies, be it at school, work, or home. Therefore, the last thing these victims want is to do anything to make it worse.
4. Downcast eyes
In other words, victims of bullying may hold their heads down and look down all the time. Understand that this type of bullying only brings about more bullying.
Why? Because it’s a sign of low self-esteem. And bullies take notice right away!
5. They have a sheepish look on their face
These victims will usually have a sheepish look on their faces. This is a dead giveaway because a sheepish look conveys shame.
Therefore, bullies will read it and take advantage.
6. How to Recognize a Victim of Bullying:
Staying Motionless to avoid drawing attention
Many victims will keep from moving to avoid drawing attention. Bullies can see through this too. They see this as a juicy opportunity. Therefore, they’re likely to pounce.
7. Protective Behaviors
Victims of bullying often have closed body language. They may cross their arms in front of their torsos. Also, they might cross their legs or hunker down into their shoulders, hiding the neck.
This signals self-protection.
8. Bad Posture
Another thing they do is display bad posture. They may slouch when they stand or sit in their chairs.
9. Over-Apologizing
You always notice a victim of bullying because the person apologizes for everything. Over-apologizing is the surefire sign of bullying and abuse.
Realize that you only apologize because you’re scared, not because you’re truly sorry. It’s a trauma response. The good news is that you can kick that habit if you want to.
10. How to Recognize a Victim of Bullying:
They’re too quiet.
Many victims are also afraid to talk to people because they’re afraid of saying something foolish or offensive and again getting persecuted for it
After being bullied for so long, you become fearful. Around people, you clam up, keep your eyes to yourself and go about your business.
However, it seldom works because bullies are like pit bulldogs. They can smell fear from a mile away. Being reserved and staying out of the way tends to bring more bullying.
They fear looking too friendly. Therefore, victims of bullying typically don’t bother to greet people. And people often mistake it for being stuck up or standoffish.
11. They fear being seen in public.
Victims are fearful of going out because they might run into the wrong people (bullies).
12. They’re Needy and Clingy.
Many victims of bullying will bend over backwards to win friends. They’ll do desperate things to win approval and even put up with shoddy treatment.
You’ll be able to point these people out easily. Why? Because they’ll crawl behind people who don’t value them.
However, they only repel good people and attract bullies when they do these things.
13. They’re People Pleasers.
Most victims of bullying try to please everyone because they think it wins them approval. They’ll say yes when they really want to say no.
Moreover, they’ll put up with disrespect just to avoid conflict. In short, they’ll have no boundaries, which only invites more disrespect.
Victim body language is easy to see
The body language that victims display is so easy to spot. However, most people in authority either ignore it or don’t consider it.
Also, this is the body language that attracts bullies, users, and abusers!
Bullies can pick up on this body language from a mile away. And they will instantly think, “target!” and take full advantage. Therefore, if you’re a victim of bullying, you must watch your body language.
It won’t be easy. However, if you want to stop looking like bully-bait, you can do it. I believe in you.
All you have to do is catch yourself displaying any of the above nonverbal cues. Then, you can correct it.
How to Recognize a Victim of Bullying:
Stop Looking Like a Victim
When you catch yourself slouching, sit or stand up straight. If you see that you’re looking down, hold your head up and look straight ahead.
Also, uncross your arms and legs. Start making eye contact with people. And when people do you wrong, don’t be so forgiving.
Begin seeing your worth and setting boundaries. Lose the sheepish look and replace it with the look of confidence.
Do these things and your situation will likely improve. Realize that you don’t need permission to be yourself. You have every right to exist!
Things may get worse before they get better. However, it’ll be worth it in the long run. I guarantee it.
This post is all about how to recognize a victim of bullying so that you can better pinpoint victim body language in others and in yourself.
Related posts you’ll enjoy:
1. Effects of Bullying on the Victim: 13 Symptoms of Bullied People
2. Signs of Low Self-Esteem and How to Correct It
3. Neediness: 5 Reasons It’s Unhealthy and How to Overcome It
4. Disadvantages of Being a People Pleaser: 7 Consequences of Putting Yourself Last
5. Who are Usually the Victims of Bullying? 11 Traits of Bully Targets