Why do bullies get away with bullying? ‘Want all the answers to this question? Here are all the answers you’ve been searching for.
Most bullies get away with their behavior and it’s a fact we all need to face. They have a knack with escaping accountability and making you look like the bad guy.
Therefore, in this post, you will get all the answers to the question, “Why do bullies get away with bullying.”
Once you learn all about these important details, you will be better able to outflank your bullies when they try to lay the blame on you.
This post will give you all the answers to the frequently asked question, “Why do bullies get away with bullying,” so that you can use this information to your advantage.
Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?
Every victim has at some point asked either themselves or another person these questions.
- “Why am I always to blame?”
- “Why do my tormentors always get away with abusing me?”
- “Why do bullies get away with bullying?”
Here are the answers, and there are many.
1. Bullies are notorious suck-ups.
They have a knack for appealing to those in authority and winning them over to their side. Understand that these types of people are very convincing liars. They use charm and allure to disarm anyone in authority.
Also, most people in authority love it when people suck up to them. And bullies instinctively know this. Therefore, they will eagerly kiss ass if it gets them what they want.
Because they kiss the right butts, supervisors, managers, and HR are more likely to overlook their rotten behavior. They also tend to thumb rides on others’ coattails.
Moreover, in school, bullies often suck up to teachers, principals, and school officials.
Sucking up is one of the reasons they gain power.
2. Why Do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?
They’re High Performers and scholars.
Many school bullies also impress school staff with academic excellence and being stars of the sports teams. In that, they make the school look good.
Therefore, the school is less likely to punish them. Instead, they’ll accuse you of picking on them.
3. They know people in high places.
Add that to their parents having connections with town and city big-shots, and they have the freedom to bully at will.
Why? Because people will be too afraid to hold them responsible for anything. They fear that their big connections just might come after them.
4. Bullies are convincing liars.
They’ve been lying and covering up bad behavior all of their lives. They have been doing this for long enough that they have learned what works and what doesn’t.
Therefore, they are master manipulators who have great skill in the arts of deception.
You must realize that these types are also very good at rationalizing and justifying their unacceptable behavior.
They are wordsmiths and con artists, who often use charm to deceive those in authority.
5. Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?
They’re masters at projection.
In other words, they project all their faults and shortcomings onto their victims. In doing this, they successfully reverse the roles, making you look like the bully and themselves the victim.
Anytime these abusers face possible accountability for their evil actions, they often cry those crocodile tears to feign victim-hood. This tactic is usually employed by females.
6. They’re charming to the right people.
Consequently, they can use this as another weapon against a victim. Bullies seem to emit an oozing charm. Nevertheless, they have a way of winning people over and making them their allies.
“How are these people able to use their good reputations as weapons?” You may wonder. Here’s a simple explanation.
When the bully has a good name among the majority, it’s much easier for her to fool everyone except you. Others find it hard to believe that “this sweet, innocent, pretty little girl” would harm anyone.
Moreover, take a look at the outgoing guy that everyone loves. No one is going to believe that this “fine young man” would ever beat up a smaller boy unless he was provoked.
7. Because they have so many friends who cherish them.
And the sad reality is this. Even if the bully’s friends did witness them attack you, their loyalty will override their sense of right and wrong. Therefore, these friends will lie for them to hide their bad behavior and place the blame on you.
8. Why Do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?
There is strength in numbers.
Unfortunately, most bullies have a large number of friends behind them. And people in large numbers wield a cumulative power that can be overwhelming for victims.
In other words, if enough people actively hate a certain person, that person is powerless, no matter how strong, smart, beautiful, or easy-going they may be.
9. They use gaslighting to keep you silent.
They’re good at placing the blame on you to make you feel like you did something wrong by defending yourself. Bullies may also lay guilt trips or hurl insults at you.
Also, they try to convince you that it’s your own fault or that the abuse is just your imagination.
Bullies are masters at this, especially females who use feminine charm to deceive bystanders and authority figures.
They will deny their abuse and trivialize everything you are experiencing. “Don’t believe your eyes, ears, nor how you feel. You’re too sensitive.”
And the most effective tactic is to make you look like you have a mental imbalance. Why? Because the tough reality is that there’s nothing that will discredit you more than the mental illness label.
10. Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?
They malign you to destroy your reputation.
They’ll recruit followers and start a campaign of hate and viciousness against you. They will spread rumors and lies about you to turn everyone against you.
Moreover, they’ll even turn your friends against you if they can.
It happens in school, the workplace, and in communities. Many times, this is how bad people retaliate against victims who have the gall to stand up to them.
Bullies hate it when you refuse to take their abuse.
11. They appeal to the self-interests of the school or workplace.
For example, the bullies may excel academically or be stars of one of the school’s sports teams. You must realize that schools have a vested interest in their sports teams and want to win championships.
Why? Because it boosts the school’s image. Also, if the school has a low number of dropouts and high graduation rate, this also reflects highly on the school.
Schools also get recognition for cranking out college-bound graduates. This adds to a schools good reputation.
And if the school has a great reputation, the larger number of students in attendance. Moreover, more parents want their kids to go to this school.
Additionally, the more students a school has, the more federal and state funds they get.
Do you see where I’m going with this?
So, right or wrong, the school won’t take your word over those of its brightest stars and highest achievers.
I want you to realize that in most cases of bullying, it’s not about who’s right or wrong. It’s about which people have the most power.
Again, most care less about right and wrong. What they care about is power and how you can benefit them in some way, shape, or form.
“What’s in it for me?”
12. Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?
They’re good at victim-blaming.
Evil people will blame you to protect one another from accountability. Moreover, they do it to protect their reputations.
Here’s something to think about. Most students in school get into two, maybe three fights in their entire twelve years of school. This sounds perfectly normal.
However, too many fights and people will likely label you a troublemaker. Teachers and school staff will see you as a problem child. And this goes whether or not your harassers provoked you.
Destroying your name with the school lessens your chances any chances of anyone listening to you. Your abusers can’t have you running and snitching.
Therefore, they may hit you first just to provoke you to fight. As soon as you hit back in self-defense, the bully draws everyone’s attention to you. And they make it look like you started it.
No one sees them hit you first. But they conveniently catch the tail end of it, when you hit back. Understand that this is how bullies set the stage.
The do this to protect themselves from discipline at school or work. Whereas, you get a bad reputation. Thus, it gives them the freedom to bully you again later.
This is also meant to silence you and make you afraid to report them or speak out about the harassment.
When people give you a bad rap, people won’t believe you when you try to get help.
Bystanders and people in authority will only think,
- “Why would so many kids have it in for her if she’s not provoking them somehow?”
- “Nobody likes him, so there has to be a reason that justifies it.”
- “She’s a lowlife, so she deserves it!”
Why do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?
Where there’s smoke, there’s fire.
People with bad reputations are the easiest to point the guilty finger at anytime a confrontation arises.
In other words, if people expect trouble to come from a certain place, that is where they’re going to look. Therefore, who’s going to look any further than the child with the worst reputation at school? Who’s going to look anywhere else other than the employee who isn’t a team player?
If you’re the one others suspect, the bullies get off scot-free.
Again, they provoke you to manipulate school staff and save their behinds from having to face repercussions.
Therefore, you don’t only need the confidence to fight bullying. You also need to know all about these types of people and how they operate.
The first step of defense is knowing the mindsets and intentions of bullies and the tactics they use.
13. Relationship is the determiner in many cases of bullying
Many times, if you’re a target of such torment, whether people believe you or not depends on their relationship with you and your abuser.
If the bully is someone they either like or love, they’ll act out of loyalty and take their word over yours. It won’t matter that the other person is in the wrong.
In fact, people may know the person is wrong. They may even witness the person’s bad behavior.
However, they’ll still may take that person’s side because that’s their friend or family member. Another possibility will be that they they dislike or may even hate them. But they dislike or hate you even more.
Therefore, they choose who they perceive to be the lesser of two evils. People tend to believe those they care about the most and disbelieve those they care about the least.
14. Why Do Bullies Get Away with Bullying?
They feign sympathy and compassion for you in front of others.
It’s not easy for people to distinguish between the real bully and the victim. Bad people are good at making you look guilty.
They show only you the worst, most brutal, and evil sides of themselves. And they do it all while showing everyone else their best, sweetest, and most loving halves of their personalities.
Fake sympathy and false compassion are powerful weapons for bullies!
They may tell others, “I feel so terrible for Jackie. I sincerely hope she gets the help she needs before it’s too late.”
These types of people very sweetly accuse their victims of attacking them when it’s the exact opposite. Therefore, they can easily confuse people, causing them to not know who did what to who. This is one reason it’s so easy to blame the wrong person.
15. They’re are in positions of power.
Anytime you’re up against people in powerful positions, it only multiplies an already bad situation. Why? Because people tend to listen to those in power.
Their positions alone give them credit, even if they haven’t earned it. Sadly, people tend to follow these types of people blindly.
My advice to you is this: It pays to have friends and connections. If you don’t have them, find ways of making them. Do it even if you must establish those connections outside of the toxic workplace or learning environment.
Friends may not be able to help you with your situation in the toxic environment. But what they can do is help you feel better about yourself. Moreover, you won’t feel alone.
Also, establishing connections and relationships now may pay off in the long run. Why? Because if people target you at your job, chances are you won’t be working there for much longer.
And maybe your outside friends and connections just may work at your next job. Therefore, life will be much easier there. And you’re least likely to get blamed if you suffer bullying.
This post gave you all the answers to the question, “Why do bullies get away with bullying” so that you’ll have the knowledge you need to not only feel better, but use to your advantage.
Related posts you’ll enjoy:
1. How Bullies Gain Power: 9 Astonishing Ways They Do It.
2. Social Bullying Examples: 7 Reasons Bullies Destroy Relationships
3. Stop Victim Blaming: 8 Reasons People Blame Targets for Bullying