‘Want to know about deliberate indifference and the most common reasons bystanders won’t help victims? These are the proven most common reasons victims of bullying need to be aware of.
Being bullies is bad enough but when others blatantly do not care to help you or acknowledge that people are abusing you, it’s much worse. Therefore, as someone who’s been on the receiving end of it, I’m giving you all the details about deliberate indifference.
In this post, you will learn exactly what deliberate indifference is and all the possible reasons bystanders won’t help you when others bully you.
Once you learn this value and life-changing information, you will be better able to take the best recourse to deal with and possibly alleviate your situation.
This post is all about deliberate indifference and bystanders’ reasons for failure to help that every victim of bullying must know.
Deliberate Indifference
You not only never forget the bullies, but you also remember the people who were there- the people who had the power to help you but did nothing.
Many times, the bystanders who see people bully you never try to intervene and stop the attacks, nor do they speak up on your behalf.
As much as I hate to say it, I was guilty of the same thing years ago. When I watched people bully a few others, I said and did nothing. Why? Because I thought that my voice wouldn’t make a difference if I did speak up. Additionally, other times, I was just damn glad that, for a change, bullies weren’t targeting me.
I was relieved that, finally, someone else taking the heat for a change.
For this, I am very remorseful and would like to apologize to all the other targets I left to fend for themselves. I’m truly sorry.
With that said, here’s the deliberate indifference definition:
According to the LSD Law Website, “deliberate indifference is a term used in criminal law to describe a situation where a person is aware of a problem or danger, but chooses to ignore it or take no action to address it. It can also refer to a lack of interest or concern about something.”
Although it happens during the commission of a crime, which is why it’s a legal term, it also happens during incidences of bullying as well.
5 Deliberate Indifference: Reasons Bystanders don’t help victims of bullying
1. They’re afraid of arousing the bullies’ anger and becoming the next target.
No one wants to be a target of bullying. I get that. Many bystanders fear getting involved, and for good reasons. However, many bystanders do have some power because they’re high on the social hierarchy.
And the higher they are in the pecking order, the more weight their words and actions carry. In other words, if some of the bystanders are extremely popular, chances are good that other bystanders will follow their lead.
Moreover, it’s more likely that the bully will leave you alone. There’s strength in numbers.
So, why won’t they use their power to help you when you’re being bullied?
It’s because they fear that speaking out in your defense would automatically weaken their social position. In other words, they’re afraid of losing their popularity.
Therefore, they either watch the attacks without doing anything, or worse. They join in, hoping to further raise their social status.
2. The bystanders see the bullies’ torment of you as entertainment.
Understand that bullies always bully you in front of an audience. In other words, bullying you is a performance to them.
Your bullies are performing in pubic to show their superiority, strength, and power. Moreover, they wish to to humiliate and embarrass you.
During altercations between bullies and targets, bystanders immediately gather around to watch it go down. Moreover, most witnesses will stand around, laughing and pointing fingers.
Many of them cheer and egg the bully on, stirring it up to get more entertainment. Consequently, all this does is encourage the bullies to continue and even escalate the abuse.
Sadly, as long as it isn’t them or someone they love getting dogged out or having their brains beat in, most bystanders think it’s funny to see it happen to someone else.
Therefore, instead of helping the target, bystanders will automatically whip out their smartphones and record the confrontation. They can then watch it later, send the film to their friends, and have another big laugh over it.
However, it’s not the least bit funny to you. It’s painful and humiliating. It can be devastating to a if you’ve already been a target of bullying for an extended time. And if you’re not careful, it can drive you over the edge if you let it.
It’s sad when the only entertainment people get is to see someone get hurt. It only goes to show that these people don’t get enough of it otherwise.
3. Deliberate indifference: The bystanders themselves either dislike or hate you.
In many cases, bullies run vicious smear campaigns and turn everyone against you. Therefore, when an altercation finally breaks out, the bystanders refuse to help you. Why?
Because they think you deserve the abuse. It’s heartbreaking. However, in a case like this, the bystanders secretly or openly take pleasure in seeing you suffer.
They may stand around snickering. Moreover, the bystanders may join the bullies in torturing you.
The bystanders are probably too cowardly to attack you or they’re afraid they’ll get into trouble. Therefore, the bullies are proxies to them.
In other words, the bullies are only doing to you what the bystanders wish they had the stones to do themselves
So, they get complete satisfaction in seeing other people stick it to you. Bystanders often hate victims so much that they would defend a total stranger before protecting someone they hate so intensely.
4. They don’t want to get involved.
Many bystanders figure that it’s none of their business and choose not to get involved. Again, many bystanders are afraid of becoming victims themselves if they intervene.
Therefore, they figure it’s much safer to just stay out of it and pretend like they didn’t see anything. See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil.
5. Deliberate indifference: The bystanders are in a rush.
In other words, they feel that they just don’t have the time. They’ve got things to do and helping you would only slow them down.
These bystanders are so indifferent that they won’t even stop and watch. They will only pass by and keep going because they’re in a hurry to get somewhere.
6. some bystanders are notorious gossips and are just there to have a story to tell later.
People who are gossips are notorious cowards. Therefore, they’ll definitely not help you. Instead, they’ll stand back and watch your bullies pummel you. And they’ll watch with glee!
In fact, they’re the nosiest people on the planet! As soon as these people hear the first sign of commotion, they’ll break their necks, rushing to the scene to see what’s happening.
Realize that these are the kinds of people who constantly wait, with bated breath, for any drama to pop off so that they can have juicy gossip to share later.
Moreover, they won’t leave until the confrontation is over because they want to get everything. Then, once the brouhaha is finished. They’ll run and give their friends and others who weren’t there to see it the latest scoop.
And know this about gossips. They do this because it’s the only way they can feel validated and important. As long as they have the latest gossip to spread, they feel good about themselves.
7. They’re sadistic.
Some people just enjoy watching others suffer and seeing the pain on their faces. Moreover, they love seeing emotional reactions, such as crying.
Therefore, this brings us back to reason number two. They get free entertainment from watching bullies bully you.
Whatever the reason they don’t help. Know that they don’t care about you. Period. It’s all about them and what they can get out of it or not get out of it.
However, understand that, no matter what their reasons are, bystanders who do nothing to stop the attacks only silently support and encourage the bullies. Not many people think about this.
Any abuse you don’t report, you support. And what you tolerate, you encourage. In other words, these bystanders are just as guilty as the bullies who perpetuate the attacks against you.
However, some bystanders either don’t understand or underestimate the power they have, especially in large numbers.
When witnesses speak up for you, the bullies will likely stop and leave you alone. And the sad reality is that, when it comes to bullying, there are too many bystanders and not enough upstanders.
This post was all about deliberate Indifference to give you all the answers as to why bystanders refuse to help victims when bullies attack.
1. The Horns Effect: Bully-Induced Bias Against Victims of Bullying
2. Bullying by Teachers: 15 Proven Signs a Teacher is Bullying You
3. Why do Schools Ignore Bullying? 7 Reasons Schools Do Nothing
4. Who are Usually the Victims of Bullying? 11 Traits of Bully Targets
5. Social Bullying Examples: 7 Reasons Bullies Destroy Relationships