7 Types of People Bullies Pick for Targets

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Have you noticed that bullies always seen to pick the same types of people to target with their bullying? Bullies pick good people, smart people, people who are creative and seem to be going places. Here are the characteristics of a typical person bullies like to select to be their punching bags:

1. Bullies like to make targets out of people who take responsibility for their lives. Targets tend to be good people who follow rules and laws. They understand that rules and laws are in place for a reason- to ensure a safe community and society.

Most targets do not go around blaming others for their actions and behavior. More often than not, targets blame themselves and try to correct their mistakes when they make them. Bullies see this and they see these people as easy to manipulate and make feel guilty for their (the bullies’) rotten behavior.

Because these people tend to blame themselves, bullies will blame these people even though it’s the bullies who have the issues and not their targets. Over time, bullies can condition targets to accept blame for things they have no control over, such as another person’s behavior.

School boy angel with wings and halo concept for being clever, good, success in education or smug

2. Bullies pick people who are goal oriented. Most targets of bullying work hard, are goal-oriented and have a truckload of self-discipline. They know that if you want anything in life, you have to work for it. Therefore, targets work like the devil to reach their goals and dreams and they have the utmost perseverance and endurance, which are characteristics that most bullies lack.

This is why many targets mistakenly stay in toxic work environments until they end up with a psychological injury from all the bullying they endure. Bullies select these people to bully because their good traits only reflect back to the bullies their own laziness, inadequacy, and lack of purpose. Bullies see these people as threats, because bullies lack self-discipline, and their relationships are usually superficial, one-sided, and short lived. And they will pull out all the stops to contain the threats.

Bullies will exploit these people’s perseverance by establishing one-sided friendships, partnerships, and romances with them. They then use the push and pull method- going hot and cold, making empty promises and love bombing the person. Bullies do this to make them hold onto the hope that just maybe the bully will give them what they’ve been wanting- acceptance, approval, attention, and praise.

But the truth is that no matter how much the person tries to better the relationship, the bullies will never be satisfied and will always find fault with him/her. Understand that one person can never sustain a relationship. It takes effort from both people!

3. Most targets of bullying are Empaths. Most targets of bullying are exceptionally empathetic people who like to help humanity. They strive for self-betterment, to empower others, and make a positive difference in the world.

This is a threat to bullies because, again, these are threats to bullies and only reflect back at them their self-centered, attention grabbing, and flawed personalities. In short, empaths force bullies to see themselves for who they truly are, and bullies will go all out to make them pay for it.

Also, bullies are masters at gaining sympathy from others. Therefore, they target people with empathy because they assume that they are the perfect to elicit sympathy from. How bullies extract sympathy from empaths is by pretending to be the real victims.

In the minds of the bullies, the target is supposed to feel terrible for them because they’ve had such a tough life. And because they (the bullies) have had it so rough, it’s why they behave like they do. So, the target is made to feel that he/she should just accept the abuse.

Understand that this is a load of bologna and it’s no excuse for being a total heel to people and treating them like garbage.

Also, empaths have difficulty setting boundaries and bullies take full advantage of it. They usually retaliate viciously when the empath finally gets tired of their crap and puts their foot down.

4. Most targets of bullying are people who make plans and think ahead. Because these people plan carefully and think ahead, they have goals and dreams that come to fruition and relationships that are solid and long lasting. Bullies are highly jealous of this and they seek these people deliberately just to tear them down.

 5. Bullies usually pick people whose communication skills need improvement. If a person’s communication skills are lacking, they will most likely suffer in silence when people violate their boundaries. Bullies rely on the target’s silence so that they can continue to bully the target and cover up their appalling behavior.

 6. Bullies select people who are givers and not takers. They love to target people who are people-pleasers and reluctant to ask for help and they select them because they see these people as easy to use and degrade. Because these people have a hard time establishing their boundaries, bullies will violate them at will and to achieve their own sick ends. Understand that bullies are takers and never givers!

 7. People who are smart. Intelligence is a huge threat to bullies. Why? Because a smart person will more than likely see through the bullies’ fake facades and call them out publicly on it. Also, just their intelligence alone can serve as a mirror and force the bullies to see their own lack of smarts and make them feel inferior. And they will seek to punish the target for that.

Why do you think kids who are smart, make straight A’s and high marks in school, and win awards are usually the ones bullied the worst? It’s because they only reflect back to the bullies their own stupidity and lack of intelligence and make them feel less than.

In order to win back your confidence and self-esteem, you must first learn the mindsets of bullies and what insecurities they have hidden inside them that cause them to bully you. Only then will you have the endurance to withstand their attacks and the confidence to counter them and defend yourself.

With knowledge comes empowerment!

26 thoughts on “7 Types of People Bullies Pick for Targets

  1. Adrienne Morris says:

    My father was raised in a bullying family. He was the favorite because he stayed under the radar and did what his father was impressed with, but his eight other siblings were brutalized. Of course, this learned behavior filtered down into the next generation. I realize now that the main character in my novels was the family scapegoat and that I was writing about my extended family’s dynamics.

    When I was a teacher a big and intelligent kid was being bullied by a bratty little pip-squeak and making his life a living hell. His parents told him to remain peaceful and rise above it, but he just couldn’t because the kid wouldn’t stop. I often wonder if the boy still lets people abuse him. He was such a sweet and noble person, but he needed to stand up for himself in some way.

    • cheriewhite says:

      My heart goes out to you, and to other family members who were bullied, Adrienne. I can’t imagine the pain of bullying by family. Being bullied at school or work is bad enough but by those who are supposed to love you- that’s got to be a living hell. My heart hurts for you all. As for the sweet boy in your class, I too hope that he put his foot down and defended himself eventually. And I hope the little pipsqueak who bullied him ended up getting body-slammed by him! Sending you lots of love! 💖🌺🌷🌞

  2. ajeanneinthekitchen says:

    So very true. I am thinking of one person who is a big bully, and she tried all these things with me. I finally told her to get lost and to leave me alone. Let her go bully someone else. Needless to say, she didn’t like my response to her.

  3. Ellie Thompson says:

    Yes, yes and yes … I totally get this and agree, Cherie – I guess it won’t come as any surprise if I tell you I was bullied through primary and secondary school. Also, in the workplace and in the very few relationships I’ve had with men. I’m learning to get out of those relationships before I get damaged or walked all over these days, but it’s ‘only’ taken me the last ten years or so! Wish I had this knowledge back then – things would have been very different. Still, I’ve got to start somewhere. Thanks again for a wonderful post – full of beneficial information. I appreciate you blogging about all this topic. 💞

    • cheriewhite says:

      You’re most welcome, Ellie! And you are a work in progress, sweetie! And those are things that I didn’t know myself when I was young but when I wised up, I began refusing to take other people’s crap. No bought you will get to that point too. I believe in you and I have no doubt that you will get to where you want to be. You are one of the strongest and bravest! 💖💪💪💪

    • cheriewhite says:

      Yes they do, Vanya. 💯 They always exploit any weaknesses the target may have, whether it’s the inability to fight back, or shyness, social anxiety, etc. They kick the person when they’re already down. It’s what makes them cowards at heart.

  4. Kym Gordon Moore says:

    Great article Cherie and oh so true. 🎯 Love this regarding empaths –
    “This is a threat to bullies because, again, these are threats to bullies and only reflect back at them their self-centered, attention grabbing, and flawed personalities.”
    And to think they try to act like they’re not flawed when they know doggone well they stink to the bone! UGH!!! 😝😖😣

    • cheriewhite says:

      Amen, girl! “…they stink to the bone” – Bingo! Empaths indeed threaten their facades and they can’t have that! I love your insightful comment because you’re wise to bullies’ fears and intentions just like I am! Great minds think alike, girlie! 💡💖😍🌺🌹

  5. Stella Reddy says:

    Thanks for the great post Cherie! Bullies hate anyone who may have control over any aspect of their lives.

    Apartment Building Staff, the people who have to deal with people like this every day, are being terrorized on a daily basis by Tenant Bullies, who hate the fact that this staff has a right to enforce the rules of apartment living, and hate that you can enter the apt. without them being there. Some will even go out of their way to get a dog, to prevent you from entering when they are not home.

    As you know, I was one such person. I followed the rules and enforced them within my job, and they couldn’t stand it so made false allegations of racism against me, even made websites, one in my own name, hoping it would stick and I would be fired and terrorized by others. They were evicted in the end, but it was a 3 yr nightmare.

    I stood my ground, still do, and after almost 6 yrs, I am finally seeing the END!! They may not be stopping their online smear campaign of me any time soon, but my mind is free of it. I have healed the trauma to the point I am happy and have peace of mind! So thank you, out of all my education, yours made the most impact….

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