How to Distinguish Between Being Alone and Being Lonely

Being alone means being in solitude- being by yourself. When you’re alone, you’re without the company of others. Being lonely, on the other hand, means having feelings of abandonment- being sad due to being isolated and alienated from others.

Alone is a state of being. Whereas, loneliness is a state of mind. An emotion. You can be in a room full of people and though you may not be alone, you can be lonely. It’s not about the number of people around you, it’s about how you feel.

When you’re alone, you can be happy. When you’re lonely, you can’t.

Being alone is sometimes beneficial because it allows you to focus on a project without disruption and makes concentration so much easier. So, you can be alone without necessarily being lonely. And everyone needs a little bit of “me-time” every day!

Being alone is being at home by yourself and enjoying a good book.
Being lonely is that dull ache in your chest after you’ve lost a family member or been thrown under the bus by your friends.

Here’s how to beat that awful feeling of loneliness:

1. Concentrate on your hobbies. Do something you enjoy doing- preferably something that takes a little concentration and consumes some time.

2. Get up and move. Exercise works wonders and has a way of producing endorphins that make you feel good. Dancing to some good music is a great picker-upper!

3. Do a home-improvement project. Clean out your garage or declutter your closets.

As you know, I was bullied for six long years in school. But I also had hobbies that distracted me from some of the loneliness.

My writing and art projects at home were one of the ways I survived those lonely years. They made things a lot more bearable and when I’d finish a project, that feeling of accomplishment I’d get would always supersede any feeling of abandonment I felt!

Never fear being alone. Too many people think that because you’re alone, it means you’re lonely. It doesn’t!

0 thoughts on “How to Distinguish Between Being Alone and Being Lonely

    • cheriewhite says:

      Thank you so much, Lance. For me, being alone isn’t a bad thing as I can get much more accomplished when I’m alone. I haven’t been “lonely” in years! And that’s a blessing 🙌

    • cheriewhite says:

      That’s understandable, Michael. I lived on a world of my own for a while too and created an alter ego. And although, it worked for me and helped me to survive, it wasn’t necessarily healthy for me. But when I started writing and music, I finally found a healthy outlet and I could leave that world behind. Thank you so much for commenting. Blessings to you and yours. 🙂🤗

  1. Kym Gordon Moore says:

    You’re right Cherie, there are definite distinctions between the two. Being alone is quite introspective and I embrace this. I step away to step in, if that makes any sense. 🤔 Loneliness is extrospective, the external where the feeling is being deserted or isolated…wanting company to be around so to speak. Well put girlfriend! 👏🏼 👍🏼 🙌🏼

  2. dawnfanshawe says:

    Absolutely, Cherie. I love being alone for large portions of time, the majority of my time, but I love human interaction too. I need both. Loneliness is horrid and I thank God that I rarely suffer from it – just the wounded inner part of me makes her loneliness known from time to time and asks for tlc. Bless you.

    • cheriewhite says:

      You’re most welcome, Dawn. 💖 And you’re so right. 💯 There has to be an even balance of the two. Too much togetherness makes you feel smothered and too much alone time makes you feel isolated. The happy middle is the best. ⚖

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *