When People Lump You into A Category Based on The Bad Behavior of Someone Close to You

I hear these stories all the time from people who have a ne’er do well brother, an uncle who’s the town drunk, or a sister who’s notorious for being promiscuous. But whether your dad did a stint in prison, or your mom is perceived by others to be the town nut-job, know that these are things you have no control over and therefore, are not your responsibility. You aren’t defined by the lousy choices or unfortunate circumstances of a few relatives.

Yes, I know that the judgement people heap on top of you hurts and hurts terribly, but I want you to know that you’re an innocent person in all of it. You’re an individual and you shouldn’t feel ashamed of anything because you’ve done nothing wrong. Realize that humans have a bad habit of lumping people into categories, whether justly or unjustly. And they’re wrong for painting you with the same brush based on bad choices a few of your family members made.

People also do this with different races and ethnic groups as well. It seems that many automatically think that all Blacks are thugs, all Whites are racist, all Native Americans are savages, all Hispanics are illegal aliens and so forth.

Yes, I’ve heard all the above statements throughout high school, in a few workplaces, even in the news media and it’s all garbage! We should all know that none of it is true. There are some of the greatest, loving, and most tenderhearted people in every race and there are many who don’t live up to the ignorant stereotypes that society likes to hoist upon them.

Therefore, I want you to know that anyone who puts you in a category with a few evil bad apples, or people who’ve simply made bad choices, doesn’t know the individual you. They do not know your heart nor your inner reality. And they don’t know what you think and feel.

Nobody can possibly know these things but you and God. And if they claim they do know, they’re only playing God by claiming to know the unknowable. Realize that when people perceive you to be someone you aren’t, their thoughts and opinions aren’t worthy of even being considered and you shouldn’t place any value to them.

In fact, you should kick these people to the curb because they aren’t worth your time nor energy. You deserve people in your life who get you- who love you for you and the good you bring to this world.

So, know that you deserve better and that you are not the labels others stick to you.

0 thoughts on “When People Lump You into A Category Based on The Bad Behavior of Someone Close to You

  1. 80smetalman says:

    As an American living in Great Britain, I have had some of these stereotypes aimed at me. I can assure everyone that I am not so fat that I need a crane to get out of bed nor am I a loudmouthed, gun toting redneck who thinks with his bible as opposed to his brain.

  2. katiemiafrederick says:

    SMiles Some Days Cherie
    Humor Is The Best

    Medicine Why

    Outcasts Often

    Become The Town
    Jester Or Even Still
    ASSessed As “Village


    No Difference
    To The one Who



    Joy Within

    Of Truly Generating

    One’S Own Happiness

    No Matter WhaT Hehe

    People See My

    Wife Always

    Walking In

    Front Of Me Sign

    Of Respect To Her

    YeT Hehe

    Not Everyone

    Wants To Be Too
    Closely Associated

    With The

    Town Jester

    Or That “Other

    Assessed Guy” Yet

    You See i Already Read

    ‘The Book’ Yes And

    Understand One Gets

    “The Happily Ever After

    Part” Before

    One Even

    Starts ‘Writing

    The Book’ Indeed Be
    This iS HoW We ALWaYS
    Come Happy Now For Real🏝

      • katiemiafrederick says:

        Balance is Key Cherie and in a World of So Many Folks “Packing
        Heat” “These Days” It Doesn’t Matter Now How Swift a Martial
        Artist moves are defending against A Bully When He Otherwise

        Might Have Left the
        Fight When A Friend
        Has A Gun Across the

        Room As In the Real World
        Comic Book Super Heroes Don’t Exist

        Faster Than A Speeding Bullet As Such…

        Even The Tricksters are a bit Unrealistic
        As ‘Tom And Jerry’ Opens Up in Theaters
        Yesterday Across the Nation And Let’s Face

        It Real Mice
        Aren’t Nearly
        That Witty for
        Trickster Escapes
        In Real Life too Anyway

        At the Heart of Every Comic Book
        Superhero May Reside Someone Wishing
        For Supernatural Revenge Against A Bully

        Oh if i could only
        Get that Bully
        Back yet

        The Friend Packing
        Heat across the Room

        For True The Greatest Martial
        Artist is the one Who Gains Enough
        Balance And Confidence Like Bruce
        Lee Per Fictional Movie Who Understands

        Fighting is Just Plain Dumb And Quite Honestly
        Even Striking Inanimate Objects is Repetitive Motion

        Trauma that often Leads to Incapacity in the Real World Too..

        As When Someone Challenged Him On An Island He Just
        Got In the Boat And Traveled to an Island Without Conflict…

        Smiles i’ve Been Practicing Marital Arts for 14,505 Miles Plus in
        the Last 90 Months Yet You See Only For the Balance that allows

        me to do Real


        Feats’ that Most

        Folks Can’t Figure

        Out Yet it’s no Different

        Than Building Pyramids

        Ya Find Center Point Balance

        Become Friends With Gravity

        And move Relatively Speaking

        Mountains Hehe even me at

        244.8 Pounds Floating Like

        A Feather across the Aisles

        Where Folks Have Asked are

        You Wearing skates yet Nope

        Still Not In Walmart These days

        Yes Just Nikes in Balance Hehe
        Running was always Repetitive Leading

        to Injury And Exercise Machines in Repetitive
        Movements also now Repetitive Movements that
        May Lead Eventually to Ergonomic Injuries Yet Free
        Style Dance Now Friends with Gravity Close to Earth
        Yet Floating Brings Balance That looks Like Magic

        Yet it is Just


        Mastered With

        Sensory And Emotional
        Intelligences And The Two
        Are Inseparable Powering Us
        In Fruition of All that Moves Us


        My Friend

        Real Fearless

        Confidence Now

        ‘Energizer Power
        Max’ Just Balance
        And Emotions Regulating
        Senses Integrating Mind And Body Soul…
        And sure the Natural Accompanying Autotelic
        Flow the Heaven That Comes With that With Various
        Metaphors to describe it Cross-Culturally Loving Friends With Gravity Essence Same..:)

  3. Yernasia Quorelios says:

    💜 Well Stated and Fully Understood; however I AM uneasy about what may seem to be Judgemental UnderTones from the SubConscious because, as Jesus said, “Let you who is without sin cast the first stone.”…a Life Mirror is an UnForgiving Beast of Our Guilty Burdens unless We CHOOSE!!! to Forgive OurSelves and Forgive Others as Jesus Does with Love


      • Yernasia Quorelios says:

        💜 I Agree and thank you for your kind words; also I Would Add that I THINK!!! that Being Ashamed of People We ARE Associated with, Whether or NOT!!! Close, is “F.E.A.R” (Friendly Emotive Response, False Evidence Appearing Real, Firm Efficient Assertive ReAction) of Being Judged by Association…as a Person with Psychiatric Conditions My Family and Friends Avoid Me Due to the Mental Health Social STIGMA!!!; so I Have Forgiven Them after Being Really Angry about Their Lack of Compassion, as Jesus put it “Forgive them; for they know not what they do.”


        • cheriewhite says:

          Absolutely! We should never be ashamed of those we love. And it’s important to stand up for them too. It goes hand in hand with not letting their unfortunate circumstances define us. We must be confident enough in our own selves to stand up for them too.

  4. bgddyjim says:

    The best advice I ever got (and actually put to use) is this, “It’s none of your business what anyone else thinks of you”. The freedom in that advice is glorious.

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