Victims often pick “friends” who only tolerate them or those who wish them ill will because they’re often lonely and desperate. For so long, they have been wrongly alienated from others due to rumors and lies that bullies have spread about them to keep them from making friends. Because the target is so hungry for a connection…any connection, he/she will befriend anyone…and I mean anyone! They are not selective with who they call “friend” and end up latching on to people who are not even worth knowing…predators, who only take advantage.
Also, young victims often assume that to be “cool”, they have to have a big circle of friends. This is not true.
With that being said, I want you to know that if you are a victim of bullying, you do not need a whole slew of people in your life to be happy nor to feel like or be a whole person. You only need your family and a few true friends. It’s safer this way. Wouldn’t you much rather have just a handful of true friends than to have an abundance of frenemies? I know I would.
In fact, you should prefer to have enemies over ‘frenemies’ because, with an enemy, you know exactly where they stand without having to do any guesswork. However, with frenemies, you will always be the last to know after being played for a sucker.
If at any time you wonder about a person…if your intuition is telling you that something is “off”, put some distance between yourself and that individual and do it fast! Instinct is trying to warn you.
If your so-called friends are only tolerating you, stabbing you in the back, or sabotaging you in any way, it’s time to eighty-six these leaches to your self-esteem. And the sooner you do, the better!
I also had a ‘friend’ but after time flew by, she started making false rumors about me and also started gossiping about me. 😔But my real friends were always there for me. ❤
Absolutely. It’s amazing how quickly you learn this life lesson.
By the way, please accept my sincerest apologies for not seeing this comment much sooner. WP has been sending a lot of legitimate comments to my spam folder lately and I didn’t think to check it. I’m truly sorry.
Thank you 😊
You don’t have to apologise, it’s okay…i know you didn’t do it on purpose 🙂
I forgot to mention, that those are my true friends. I hope everyone gets friends like mine. They are awesome!
I hear you. It’s friends like those who are hard to find.
One good test here is how do they treat you in front of others when it is a group of friends. I mean a little playful picking at one another when it is not taken seriously is one thing but we all have had that “friend” who when it was just you and then together or chatting, texting etc they sing your praises and you are really tight. But then get them in a group of other friends and all of a sudden they are short with you, critical, always making you the butt of the jokes, etc and doing it to you but noone else.And if you say something to them then they deny it.
Wow! I didn’t think about that one but you know? You’re right! I went through a few of those occasions myself and it felt horrible! Thank you for giving me another writing prompt! I will definitely write a post on this very subject.
Awesome! It is one thing for a group to all playfully give each other not taken serious grief but when it is one being ganged up on the butt of all the “playful” picking then that is a Frenemy. They are close to you when no one else is around. And I will add if the other friends get jealous of someone having one than one close friend that is problematic too.
Absolutely! And I’ve definitely had so-called friends get extreeeemely jealous anytime they’d see me talking to someone else.